- 8 months ago
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00:00Meet the gang, cos the boys are here, the boys to entertain you.
00:09With music and laughter to help you on your way, to raising the rafters with a hey, hey, hey.
00:15With songs and sketches and jokes old and new, with us about you and Phil Blue.
00:21So meet the gang, cos the boys are here, the boys to entertain you.
00:26B-O-B-O-Y-S, boys, to entertain you.
00:44Oh, dear, oh, dear, what a sad day it is for all of us here at Royal Artillery Depot, dear Lally.
00:50We have all been saying goodbye to Bombardier Salam Saab, who has left us and gone home to Blighty.
00:56As farewell present, he has given me this splendid and top-hole watch.
01:01Oh, it is so jolly nice.
01:03There is only one problem.
01:04It has no insides.
01:06But Bombardier Salam and Saab has told me that it shows the correct and proper time twice a day at 11 minutes past 10.
01:14So all I need is another watch now to show me when it is 11 minutes past 10, so that I can look at this watch and see that it is indeed 11 minutes past 10.
01:26He has also given me one chitti to show to the Indian police to prove that it was a gift and that I have not stolen it.
01:35Unfortunately, he has not given me a chitti to stop the Indian police from stealing it.
01:39So I will keep it very carefully hidden in my doughty.
01:45Salaam, Rundi.
01:46Ah, Salaam, Mohamed.
01:48Oh, dear me.
01:49Just think we shall never see Bombardier Salam again.
01:53Ah, I feel that I have lost very dear friend.
01:56And I have lost the sale of four cuffs of child, eh?
01:59You're a ratty fool.
02:02You think of nothing but your own pocket.
02:06Ah, I can hear weeping and wailing from concert party, Basha.
02:10Come, let us go and comfort the Saabs.
02:13Chalo, bai, chalo.
02:17Oh, Saab, Saab, Saab.
02:19What sad day it is today.
02:21Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
02:24Don't rub it in, Randy.
02:26I shall never forgive Solly for this.
02:28I mean, he's desertin' me.
02:30I mean, what's going to happen to the concert party now?
02:32You can't blame him for going, Gloria.
02:34He has done his three years.
02:36Thank goodness I've nearly done mine.
02:38I've only got six months to go.
02:40Doesn't it sure?
02:42You shan't be great, butch-scotch-hairy-haggis.
02:45Oh, be careful, Saab.
02:46Now that Bombardier Salam and Saab is not here,
02:48there is nobody to protect you.
02:50Thanks for reminding me of Andy
02:54What do you say a petal when there's nothing wrong with being butch and hairy, and I think those tattoos are very tasteful
03:03Well the question is who is to be promoted to bombardier well I wouldn't hear a stripes and a gift
03:10Mind you the money would come in handy
03:12That's true
03:18Sweep it up Randy sweep it up moment
03:22It's quite a responsibility you know being a bombardier I mean apart from running the show you've got to be able to maintain discipline
03:28Oh, I quite agree. I mean this concert party has to be run with an iron hand
03:32Otherwise, we're all liable to break out dash down to the bazaar pillaging looting and raping
03:36I mean nobody in charge why don't we all go on the rampage?
03:42Count me out. I'm not doing any raping or pillaging
03:48Sarb, as Sergeant Major Sarb thinks that Parky Sarb is his son, perhaps he will give him the two stripes
03:53And Sarb, he's always telling you what fine shoulders you have and how jolly good-looking you are
03:58Oh no, I wouldn't want that Randy, I wouldn't want to get any promotion just on me looks
04:02Well, I wouldn't touch him with the barge pole
04:07Mind you I'm entitled to them. I mean I am the only true professional artist here
04:12Sarb, thus speaks the wisdom of Sullivan
04:15I wouldn't accept it either
04:17Mind you I really ought to have it with all my qualifications
04:20I mean I ask you, how many bombardiers in the Royal Artillery have got a degree in English literature?
04:25I ask you
04:27How many bombardiers got a degree in English literature?
04:31None!
04:32And I will tell you why, Mr. La-de-da gunner Graham
04:35It is because of the start-arse quo
04:37In the British Army officers should speak like officers
04:39NCOs and gunners should speak like NCOs and gunners
04:41That is the start-arse quo
04:43Do you understand?
04:45Well, not really, Sergeant Major, no
04:49Well, not really, Sergeant Major, no
04:51If all bombardiers spoke la-de-da, nobody would know where we are
04:55Get properly, fucking Mooselle, Mooselle
04:57You should be there by now
04:59I'm probably at ease, watch it
05:01What?
05:02Help!
05:03Turn that ice!
05:04It's uneasy
05:05Now
05:06You have all been saying goodbye to bombardiers Solomon
05:08And you is all very upset
05:10Oh dear, how sad never mind
05:12My lovely boys, let's have a look at you
05:15You evil
05:16Hello
05:17Something wrong here?
05:19My finger is staying in the horizontal position
05:21Normally when I count you lot, it droops
05:23Where is the droop?
05:24Sorry, Mr. Tom
05:26Here is droop
05:28Where has you been gonna suck them?
05:31Down to see if the males come in
05:33When one of you lot gets a letter, that is the only time a male gets into this bar show
05:37You puffs
05:38Get Bobby Fellian
05:40It's not a letter, it's a song
05:42I sent home for Tosti's Goodbye
05:44Shut up and get Fellian
05:53Now
05:54You may all have been puzzled when you were saying goodbye to bombardiers Solomon's
05:58That Colonel Reynolds and Captain Hashwood was not there
06:01This may seem strange to you because bombardiers Solomon spent most of his time crawling around the Colonel's Jaxi
06:06And the Colonel was fond of him
06:10But the Colonel and the Captain was not there because they is in hospital with Quarantine
06:14Suspected of having picked up something nasty
06:18I'm sorry to hear that
06:19Is it contagious, Sergeant Major?
06:21No, lovely boy, not unless you catches it
06:24Now I suppose you is all wondering who is going to be promoted to bombardier
06:30Well, I will tell you
06:33Colonel Sugden
06:35What is the name of that song you just got?
06:38Er, Tosti's Goodbye
06:40It's very sad
06:42Good
06:44Let's hear it
06:45Sing, Lofty
06:47Now
06:48Goodbye
06:49Forever
06:50Goodbye
06:51Forever
06:52Goodbye
06:53Forever
06:54Goodbye
06:55Goodbye
06:56Goodbye
06:57Goodbye
06:58Goodbye
07:01Beautiful
07:03Beautiful
07:04That was Tosti's Goodbye
07:06That was Toasty's Goodbye
07:07Now I was going to give you Sergeant Major Williams' Goodbye
07:12None of you is going to be promoted to bombardier
07:14Because there is not going to be no concert party for you to be promoted bombardier of
07:18You is all posted up the jungle
07:20But Sergeant Major, you can't post us up the jungle without the Colonel's permission
07:23Shut up
07:24The Colonel would not know nothing about it, seeing as he is in hospital
07:27And cannot see anybody or come into contact with any human beings for the next two weeks
07:31And by the time he gets out, you will be gone
07:34Won't you get into trouble, Sergeant Major?
07:40Any trouble I gets into, gunna la-dee-da-geraim, will be well worth it to get rid of you lot
07:46Now hear this
07:48Them postings will take ten days to come through
07:50And I as not having you lot in here bashing you a chart-poys all day
07:53So, get a McIntosh Clark and Evans
07:55Sir
07:56Cookhouse fatigues, gunna Graham
07:57Sir
07:58Library fatigues
07:59Can I park him?
08:00Sir
08:01Battery office
08:02Can I point Batman to Colonel Saunders
08:07The rest of you
08:11Permanent whitewashing off stones
08:15I want them stones gleaming white
08:17Gleaming, gleaming
08:18That's all
08:19That's best
08:20Who is that right now?
08:22Goodbye
08:23Goodbye
08:24Goodbye
08:25Goodbye
08:26Oh, what terrible day that was for concert party, huh?
08:30Now they have all been dismembered
08:32Ever since then they have been on fatigues
08:37In wash house, cook house and such like places
08:40Don't be such clever dicky
08:42Don't be such clever dicky
08:46Come quick
08:47There's an urgent conference in the concert party, basha
08:50And they're needing your help
08:52Atcha
08:53Challow by
08:54Challow
08:55Right
08:56That's another day nearer to us getting posted
09:00Oh, for goodness sake, put a sock in it
09:02Every day you tick off that silly calendar
09:03You say
09:04That's another day nearer to us getting posted
09:05But nobody does anything
09:06Nobody does anything
09:07Why doesn't somebody do something?
09:08I can't understand this pressure
09:09It's too great
09:10I can't understand this pressure
09:11It's too great
09:12I can't understand this pressure
09:13It's too great
09:14I can't understand this pressure
09:15It's too great
09:16I can't understand this pressure
09:17It's too great
09:18I can't understand this pressure
09:19Rob
09:20If pressure too great
09:21Get bigger size of boots
09:22From quartermaster
09:24I'll belt up, Randy
09:26Rob
09:27I am completely belted up
09:28That could be the cause of the pressure
09:30What?
09:31Your belt's too tight
09:32The pressure is in my mind
09:35My artistic sensitive mind
09:37Let's see, a mind
09:39What we need is a clear logical mind
09:41To help us get out of this mess
09:43That's right
09:44A clear logical mind
09:46And Saab
09:47Who could have more clear logical mind
09:49Than Graham Saab
09:50With all his wonderful university education
09:53And after all
09:54Wasn't it not pupil of Eton
09:56Who invented flush toilet?
09:58I don't think I quite follow that, Randy
10:01Oh, Saab
10:02Have you not heard the story?
10:03Oh, Saab
10:04It is something that
10:05All we British should be truly proud of
10:07You see, Saab
10:12There was this brilliant scholar of Eton
10:14Who had drawn up a plan for flush toilet
10:16And another scholar said
10:18This will not work
10:19So
10:20He challenged him to do it
10:21And hence
10:22You get the saying, Saab
10:24That the battle of the Waterloo
10:26Was won on the playing field of Eton
10:28Yes, well, as I see it
10:31It's a simple mathematical problem of syllogistics
10:33Now, let A equal the Colonel in quarantine
10:36B equals us in here
10:37And X equals the way to get the message to the Colonel
10:40A, B, X
10:42C comes after B, not X
10:44Hey, fellas, can we tie a little message to a cricket ball and throw it?
10:50That's not really very logical, Nobby
10:52We could tie a little note to a pigeon
10:55No, Saab
10:56There are no pigeon left in this part of India
10:58The kite hawks have all eaten them
11:00Right
11:01We'll catch a kite hawk and get lessons
11:03Will somebody please say something sensible?
11:06Saab
11:07I have it
11:08I will disguise myself
11:09And sneak into hospital with message
11:11Oh, now, Ranji
11:12You might catch something
11:13Not to worry, Saab
11:14I've had all dreaded Indian diseases
11:17Derry belly
11:18Swamp fever
11:19Yellow fever
11:20No, no, no, Ranji
11:21Yeh Rahi, Saab
11:22Desi mimari hai
11:23Saab ko lagti hai
11:24Veleti mimari hai
11:25Hay fever
11:26How dare you?
11:27Go and pull your punkah
11:29Bakhtiri
11:30Bakhtiri
11:31Bakhtiri
11:32Saab
11:33In order to get into hospital
11:36I will disguise myself as nurse
11:39Alright
11:40I'll end your mask skirt and black stockings
11:42No, no, Saab
11:44Male nurse
11:46Perhaps you're right
11:48You haven't got the legs for it
11:50Here we are again
11:53Happy as can be
12:00Have you started to feel anything yet, Ashrod?
12:03No
12:04Yes, Saab
12:05I was just taking a nap
12:07Do come out from under that net
12:09Oh, I'm sorry, Saab
12:11No, Saab
12:13I can't see how we could possibly have swamp fever
12:16When we haven't been near any swamps
12:18It was all your fault taking me to that restaurant
12:20It wasn't in a swamp
12:22Wasn't it?
12:24Mind you, that mango fool we had for pudding was a bit watery
12:27It had nothing to do with the mango fool, you fool
12:29One of the waiters had swamp fever
12:31Well, anyway, we've only got to be here for three more days
12:33Message from G.H.Q. Saab
12:35It's for the Colonel
12:40Give it to him
12:41Together
12:42Thank you, my man
12:43What's he waiting for?
12:44I think he wants a tip
12:53Well, give him something, will you?
12:56Oh, don't give him a whole rupee, that's far too much
13:01But I can't get a coin on the pill
13:03Give him one of those bath buns
13:05Oh, thanks
13:12Thanks, Hoffley
13:15Oh, good heavens
13:16Perhaps I shouldn't have done that
13:17He might catch, or we don't know if we've got or not
13:20Do use your intelligence, Ashwood
13:22Indians don't catch things, they give them to us
13:28What's he say?
13:30Have you got any butter?
13:33Damn cheap
13:34Clear off
13:36I don't think
13:37Throw things on the floor, Ashwood
13:38Oh, I'm sorry, sir
13:44I say, have a care
13:48Good heavens, the Supremo's coming
13:50What, Lord Thingy?
13:51Yes
13:52Yes, he's coming next week
13:53And they want us to put on a show for him
13:55I hope the concert party's in good shape
13:57Oh, don't worry, sir
13:58Beaumont's pretty keen
13:59I've been just rehearsing them like mad
14:08Excuse me, Colonel, sir
14:09Not today, thank you
14:10Colonel, sir, it is me
14:12You mean, it is I
14:13Yes, sir, it is I
14:14Who's I?
14:16My eyes, sir
14:17Both of them
14:18Good heavens, Bear
14:19What are you doing here?
14:20You'll catch something
14:21Oh, no
14:22Do not worry, Colonel, sir
14:23I am totally in fume
14:26Colonel, sir
14:27Captain, sir
14:28For urgent and grave news
14:29Concert party is about to be posted
14:31Up, jungle
14:32But the Supremo's coming
14:33Yes, the Supremo's coming
14:34Oh, Colonel, sir
14:35Please do not eat it
14:36Don't grab that Indian ice cream
14:38Full of germs
14:39Bear, will you please go and get
14:41Sergeant Major Williams at once
14:42Tell him to come here at the double
14:43Colonel, sir
14:44He might catch something
14:45Don't worry, I'll make special arrangements
14:47Off you go
14:48Geldy, geldy
14:49Mr. Colonel, sir
14:50Geldy, geldy
14:51Oh, blimey
14:52Yes, doctor, sir
14:54You have to leave the job
14:55You have to leave the job
14:56You have to leave the job
14:57This job is necessary
14:58And you do it
14:59And you do it
15:00And you do it
15:01And you do it
15:02And get on with it
15:03Now, sir, doctor, sir
15:04What's he say, Barrow?
15:06Colonel, sir
15:08He has asked me to do something
15:09That I would not dream of doing
15:11To British officers
15:20That is all the postings through
15:22Where'd the concert party go, Sergeant Major?
15:25The Jungle Battle School in Assam
15:28Wish I was going with them, sir
15:30Really, boy?
15:32Ooh
15:36That's what I like to see
15:37Keenness
15:39Shoulders back, boy
15:40Shoulders back
15:41Why better shoulder as you show them off?
15:44We dare not see
15:45I mean, that dandruff of yours
15:46Is clearing up nicely
15:49We used to send you up the jungle
15:50Might brig out again
15:51And who knows where it would end
15:54I shall be sorry to see him go, sir
15:57Yes, I'll be very sorry, too, boy
16:02I can hardly wait to get him on parade
16:04And...
16:05Tell him
16:06He's leaving at 1100 hours tomorrow
16:10Oh!
16:11Shut up! Shut up!
16:12Shut up!
16:13How dare you come bursting in the battery office like that
16:15Stand to attention!
16:16About time!
16:17Quick march!
16:18Left side, left side, left side, left side, left side
16:19March!
16:20About time!
16:21Close the door!
16:22Not on the door!
16:23Open the door!
16:24Quick march!
16:25Left side, left side, right side, right side, left side
16:27Oh, sir, sir
16:29Colonel, sir
16:30wants to see you at them
16:32Shut up!
16:34Have you gone off your flaming rock, huh?
16:36How only Colonel see me
16:37He's in hospital and highly conflagious
16:40Sir, he has made the special arrangement
16:42When this sound with the last fall clear
16:49Doctor, sir
16:50Right!
16:51Do not come any closer, Sergeant Major
16:55And put this over your head
17:03I hope this disinfectant is not too strong
17:05But we can't afford to take any chances, you see
17:07Now, Bera
17:08Splash the veil every 15 seconds
17:10Oh, Doctor, sir
17:12Unfortunately
17:13My watch does not go beyond 11 minutes past 10
17:17Well, count 15 slowly then
17:18What's that, sir?
17:19Is it safe for you to speak to the fellow now, Colonel?
17:21Thank you, Doctor
17:22Start spraying the veil
17:23What's that, Doctor, sir?
17:27What the hell?
17:28If you need any more disinfectant
17:29Let me know, won't you?
17:30What's that, Doctor, sir?
17:32Now, listen to me, Sergeant Major
17:33Sir?
17:34What the hell do you mean by posting the concert party
17:35Without my permission?
17:36Well, sir, I was only doing my due
17:38I don't want to hear a lot of excuses
17:43Stop the posting at once
17:45Don't you realise the Supremo's coming in three days?
17:48We've got to put on a special show for him
17:50The Supremo, sir?
17:53Yes, you know, the Admiral Supremo
17:57What are we going to say to him if there's no show?
17:59Well, with respect, sir, you as a Colonel in the Army
18:02And you don't need to worry about no Dago sailors
18:05I'm talking about Admiral Lord Thingy
18:08Admiral Lord Thingy?
18:11Right, we're finished, Doctor
18:12Stop the postings
18:13And start the concert party rehearsing at once
18:15And that is an order
18:16I'm afraid that this disinfectant was a bit stronger than I thought
18:25Good to go
18:32Good to go
18:33Come in
18:34Sergeant Major, sir
18:35I've given Beaumont, sir, your message
18:36And he's coming
18:37Good
18:38Get two mugs of tea
18:39Oh, sir, Sergeant Major, sir
18:40Oh, sir, Sergeant Major, sir
18:41Oh, sir, Sergeant Major, sir
18:42It is most kind of you to ask me to partake of tea with you
18:44I am totally honored
18:45Shut up
18:46Not for you to forget Beaumont
18:48Now, when he comes in here
18:49You stay with me
18:50Cause I'm gonna butter him up
18:51And give him a bit of the old soft soap
18:52What's that, sir?
18:53No, no
18:54You are desiring chance, Sergeant Major, sir?
18:55Shut up and crouch in the corner
18:57I want you to prepare tea for Beaumont, sir
18:58And then Sergeant Major, sir
18:59Is going to butter him up with soft soap?
19:00Shut up
19:01Come in
19:02You wanted to see me, Sergeant Major?
19:03I want you to prepare tea for Beaumont, sir
19:05And then Sergeant Major, sir
19:07Is going to butter him up with soft soap?
19:08Shut up
19:09Come in
19:11You wanted to see me, Sergeant Major?
19:13You wanted to see me, Sergeant Major?
19:16Yes, lovely boy.
19:18A chair for Gunna Bump.
19:20I just had to make it up.
19:23You may serve the tea, Bearer.
19:25Do you fancy a kinky?
19:27I don't think I should. I have to watch my figure.
19:30You should, you should, lovely boy.
19:32I was saying the other day, when you get that Ginger Rogers dress on,
19:35it's hard to believe you as a man.
19:37That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me, Sergeant Major.
19:40Ooh, lovely boy. By means every word of it.
19:46Tea, sir.
19:48Bearer.
19:49Sir.
19:50You can tell the charwalla to go now.
19:52I have not seen the Sergeant Major doing the buttering with the soft soap yet.
19:59How dare you!
20:01But it's not for you damn natives to watch.
20:03But it's only for us British.
20:05Now, Gunna Beaumont, you will be pleased to know I has used whole my influence
20:13and got them postings cancelled.
20:15Does that mean we're not going to get sent up the jungle after all?
20:17That's right.
20:18Oh, thank you very much, Sergeant Major.
20:20Mind you, Sister's well, the Colonel was telling me to tell you
20:22that he wants you to do a special show next Tuesday evening.
20:25Oh, I'm sorry, I couldn't do that.
20:30Why not?
20:31Well, I'd like to. I just couldn't get the show ready in time.
20:33I mean, my nerves would never stand it.
20:35Besides, I'm quite happy where I am, being Batman to Colonel Saunders.
20:38I get on ever so well with his wife.
20:41I help her design all her frocks.
20:43She says I'm a little treasure.
20:51It's a very special show, you know.
20:53Hey, do you know who's going to be there?
20:54Who?
20:57Admiral Lord...
21:01I'm sorry, I can't help it.
21:02I still can't get the show ready in time.
21:06You... you know who his mate is, don't you?
21:08No.
21:09Noel Coward.
21:11Noel Coward?
21:13And if the Admiral sees you in the show,
21:15he's bound to tell his mate Noel, isn't he?
21:17What'd he do with that, Sergeant Major?
21:19With you a talent, lovely boy, he's bound to spot you.
21:21I can see it now.
21:22When you get back to Blighty,
21:24on the troop ship,
21:26he lowers the gangplank,
21:28and there is Noel Coward,
21:30standing there with his contract in his hand.
21:34Well, Sergeant Major,
21:36I'm going to be a star,
21:37and I owe it all to you.
21:43Yes, lovely boy.
21:44You owe it all to me.
21:45Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
21:51Swing high, swing low,
21:53swing to, swing fro,
21:55the way they said wedding bells swinging,
21:58you know,
21:59in rhythmic rhyme,
22:01keep tune and time.
22:03Hold it, hold it, hold it!
22:05Hold it, hold it!
22:06Hold it!
22:07What are you playing?
22:09Swing high, swing low.
22:11What's the matter?
22:12Isn't it loud enough?
22:13Oh yes, it's loud enough.
22:14Oh, what's wrong with it then?
22:15This is supposed to be a romantic number
22:17with a gentle swing.
22:18Well, I am swinging it.
22:19I thought I'd, er,
22:20give it a bit of a beat as well.
22:22I'm meant to be a girl in an English garden.
22:25Not Tarzan in the jungle!
22:29Don't you mean Jane?
22:30Oh!
22:31And Lofty!
22:34Why are you wearing those glasses?
22:36You're meant to be a soldier!
22:37It's all right,
22:38there are my issue glasses
22:39for wearing under a gas mask.
22:41They didn't have gas masks in those days!
22:44Oh, start the whole thing again.
22:45Get me up the ranch!
22:46All right!
22:47Swing high, swing low,
22:50swing to, swing from,
22:52the way they said wedding bells swinging.
22:55Right, lovely boys,
22:56now don't forget,
22:57I want it to be a really good show tonight.
22:58Oh, son of it is half in this tough hall, too!
23:00There are no moments of look lovely lady on the swing.
23:03Does it not give you joy
23:05to see him swinging to and fro?
23:07Yes, I'd like to see him swing.
23:09You're nervous, Sergeant Major.
23:11Fancy the Supremo being in the audience tonight?
23:13You've got nothing to worry about, lovely boy!
23:15He's bound to like you!
23:16Can't you push him harder, Bella?
23:17I want it to be a really good show!
23:19Wait a minute, Tom!
23:20I think I'm pushing him quite high enough!
23:22Come out of the way, come out of the way!
23:23Let me do it!
23:24Stop!
23:25What?
23:26Better, isn't it?
23:29What's that up?
23:30Well, good on C!
23:32What?
23:33My ankle!
23:34My poor ankle!
23:35Sir, pleased to drink this!
23:36Oh, thank you!
23:37What did the doctor say, Ashford?
23:38We've sprained his ankle rather badly, sir.
23:39He won't be able to walk for a week.
23:40My career's in ruins!
23:41Ruins!
23:42You'll have to cancel the show, sir!
23:43We can't!
23:44The Supremo's here in a couple of hours!
23:45Well, how are we going to do the show without a leading lady, sir?
23:46Well, couldn't we use a real woman, sir?
23:48Look, I hold you responsible for this, Sergeant Major.
23:50You got us into this mess and you jolly well get us out of it.
23:53I don't mind what you do, but just fix it and that is an order.
23:55Come along, Ashford.
23:56This is a letter.
23:57Thank you, Sergeant.
23:58I'm sorry.
23:59I'm sorry.
24:00I'm sorry.
24:01I'm sorry, Sergeant Major.
24:02I'm sorry.
24:03I'm sorry, Sergeant Major.
24:04I'm sorry.
24:05I'm sorry, Sergeant Major.
24:06I'm sorry.
24:07I'm sorry.
24:08I'm sorry, Sergeant Major.
24:09I'm sorry.
24:10I'm sorry!
24:11I'm sorry.
24:12I'm sorry.
24:13This is a lovely way.
24:24The show seems to be going well, Ashford.
24:26Absolutely first class.
24:28Are you enjoying the show, sir?
24:30Oh, interesting, yes. Yes, very interesting.
24:33Keen on paper tearing, are you, sir?
24:36I don't think I've ever seen anything like that before.
24:38You know, I think my friend Noel would certainly find it very amusing.
24:43Your friend Noel? Yes, of course.
24:45And your cousin?
24:46Cousin? What cousin?
24:48Oh, oh, oh, yes, she's very fond of theatricals.
24:53It's like having her tonight in Dixie.
24:55The whole thing's a travesty.
24:58Never mind, the show must go on.
25:00Randy, stand by to turn the mic on.
25:02Watch out. Stand by to turn mic on, sir.
25:05Hey, mother!
25:08Swing high, swing low, Nick, sir.
25:17Oh, really?
25:18Had a bit of trouble with the girl on the swing.
25:21What, you personally?
25:22Not me personally, sir.
25:24Oh, that's all right, then, sir.
25:26That was, that was Gunnar Evans tearing him up.
25:30And now Gunnar Sogdon will tear you up with swing low.
25:35Randy, you're pulling the curtains the wrong way.
25:37Oh, sorry, Carl.
25:37Swing high, swing low, swing to, swing fro.
25:48The way they set wedding bells swinging, you'll know.
25:52In rhythmic rhyme, keep tune and time.
25:56As though you were ringing your bridal chime.
25:59You know, there's an old Hindu proverb which say that if you are pushing a lady on a swing who is singing in high voice, you must be careful that the swing does not come back and hit you.
26:25Or else you also will be singing in high voice.
26:29You must be singing in high voice.
26:30I'm going to go then.
26:31I'll go then.
26:31I'll go then.
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