- 5 hours ago
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00:07Music
00:23Arriving at the junction of Harewood Avenue in the High Street,
00:26our walk takes us left into the High Street itself.
00:31Interesting features to note are
00:34a fine mock Tudor frontage to the video shop,
00:38a striking orange fascia to the job centre,
00:42and 15p of frozen peas at the minibus.
00:48While stocks last.
00:50Mrs Bidmead? What's all this, then?
00:53It's a face-in-the-crowd competition. It's to encourage people to use the centre.
00:57Oh, I see. Another one of Brittus' daft ideas, is it?
01:00Mr Brittus does not have daft ideas.
01:03Mr Brittus always has good ideas.
01:06He is an ideas man.
01:08Oh, yes. Like his archery classes for the elderly.
01:11That was not Mr Brittus' fault. That arrow could have gone anywhere.
01:15I happen to know that he paid for the funeral out of his own pocket.
01:18So this fellow wins a year's free admission to all our facilities.
01:23And a magnificent prize it is, too.
01:25A man would kill for a prize like that.
01:27I'm sorry, I'm not having it.
01:29He's not using my sauna for free.
01:31Can I have a pen, please, Carol?
01:33Will one of Ben's felt tips do?
01:35Or crayons? Or magic markers?
01:37Indelible, water washable. They come in three colours.
01:39Blue, black and red.
01:41This will be fine.
01:43No one asked me about this.
01:45Mrs Bigmead, have you taken leave of your senses?
01:50After a further 642.75 metres,
01:54we passed the Ingle Nook home for the elderly,
01:57so tragically destroyed by a stray flaming arrow.
02:00The building is now being restored to its former glory.
02:05Excuse me, please, young man.
02:07I've got to come through.
02:08I'm sorry, you're on the way.
02:09You must have accurate measurements.
02:11This, then, is Frenchman's Hill.
02:15Famous for...
02:17It's Frenchmen.
02:20OK.
02:29So, as we near the end of walk number 38
02:32from the precinct to the gyratory system,
02:35one is reminded of Mahatma Gandhi's famous words.
02:38Oi!
02:40I need a birth who runs a leisure centre!
02:47I should leave that if I were you, Colin.
02:49You're only making it worse.
02:51You saw it, Carol.
02:52That was a piece of pure premeditated vandalism.
02:55Oh, stop it, Ben!
02:57Now, kiss and make up.
02:58Come along, darling.
02:59Big hugs.
03:00That's right.
03:00Breathe deeply, breathe deeply.
03:02Good boy.
03:02What a caring mother you are, if I may say so, Carol.
03:06Oh, thank you, Colin.
03:07I'm giving Ben chicken pox at the moment.
03:10I'm sorry?
03:11Well, Ben's never had it.
03:12The twins have, but Ben hasn't.
03:13And it's very important that he gets it out of the way while he's still a child.
03:16So I've invited his little friend, Sophie, around.
03:18And she's absolutely covered in spots and highly contagious.
03:21So, with a bit of luck, he might come down with a really serious infection.
03:25I am lost in admiration for you, Carol.
03:28Thank you, Colin.
03:30Vivinda says she does it twice a day.
03:32Meditation's supposed to relieve stress and solve problems.
03:35Well, I don't see how sitting around with your eyes closed can solve your problems.
03:38It's a load of old nonsense.
03:39It's all right.
03:40She can't hear me.
03:41Yes, she can.
03:42Well, I'm going to join the meditation class this morning.
03:44It could help reduce my anxiety levels.
03:46Why are you going to do table tennis?
03:47Gosh, I feel better for that.
03:49Relaxed.
03:50Calm.
03:51Filled with a deep sense of inner peace.
03:54What am I down for this morning, Gavin?
03:56Uh, martial arts.
03:57Great!
03:59Interesting walk, Mr Britus?
04:02Incident pack, Colin.
04:03No, not interesting per se.
04:06Certainly not as interesting as walk number 27.
04:08Ah, yes.
04:09The roundabouts of Whitbury.
04:11Their verges and their bollards.
04:13That's amazing stuff.
04:14A heady brew for Eddie Walker.
04:15Give me a hand with this, will you?
04:17Certainly, Mr Britus.
04:19I've done two more walks myself, Mr Britus, for your research.
04:23Good man.
04:24Debriefing my office ten minutes.
04:26Welcome, Mr Britus.
04:27I've also rigged up the face in the crowd display,
04:29but I'm afraid I have to report that Mrs Bitmead has defaced the poster.
04:34Dear, oh dear, oh dear.
04:37Shall I call the police?
04:38Not yet, Colin.
04:40I'd better look into the matter first.
04:41If it should come to court, Mr Britus,
04:43Carol here was a witness to the whole event.
04:46Is this true, Carol?
04:47Yes, Mr Britus.
04:48In fact, it was Carol who lent her the pen.
04:51Really, Carol?
04:54Well, I suppose...
04:55So you are in fact an accessory to this alleged act of vandalism.
04:59Well, I suppose...
05:00I would be careful what you say, Carol.
05:03I shall, of course, be holding a full internal inquiry,
05:05but I'd strongly advise you not to say anything at all
05:08till you've spoken to your legal representative.
05:12I tell you, I'm dead on my feet.
05:14I've walked miles and miles and miles.
05:17He won't let me use the car anymore.
05:19Why not?
05:20Oh, it's Gordon's walking for health programme.
05:22It's killing me.
05:23He had this stupid idea.
05:25He put it to the European Commission.
05:27It's now a Euro-directive.
05:30He's got to find 50 interesting walks in Whitbury.
05:33The only interesting walk in Whitbury
05:35is the walk out of Whitbury.
05:36Oh, no.
05:36Can't take much more.
05:38Do you want to try some of the green ones?
05:39No.
05:41You're joining in the meditation week.
05:43They've got a swami coming in.
05:44No.
05:44I tried it once, years ago.
05:46Didn't do anything for me.
05:47Tools are more reliable.
05:53Has the swami arrived yet?
05:55Carol?
05:57We haven't had any deliveries this month.
05:59No.
06:00The swami.
06:01He's the Hindu meditation teacher.
06:02Why is he called a swami?
06:04It means master, Gavin.
06:05He's from the East.
06:06When he comes to him,
06:07would you take him to the dance studio?
06:08I've got jiu-jitsu.
06:10Carol, what's the matter?
06:11You seem a bit upset.
06:12I don't think I can say anything without my lawyer present.
06:14What?
06:16I'm being investigated.
06:18Investigated about what?
06:19Morning, love.
06:21Um, welcome to Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre.
06:23How may she help you?
06:26Harry Johnson.
06:27I'm here to run meditation classes.
06:29Oh, great.
06:29Tim Whistler.
06:30I'm really looking forward to them.
06:31I'll show you the room.
06:32Hey, hey, hey.
06:32I thought you said he was from the East.
06:33He is.
06:34Scarborough.
06:37Hello.
06:39It's me.
06:41Is this you?
06:43Yes, it's me.
06:47Who do I see about the prize?
06:55I've got some old map she wanted.
06:58Excellent.
06:59From Brussels phone to see how you're getting on with your walks for health.
07:02Apparently they're getting a very good response from leisure centres throughout Europe.
07:06Good.
07:06There's mad buggers wandering all over the place.
07:10And the Germans have already marched through Poland.
07:13Yeah, it's all right, Julie.
07:14That's the country for walk number 38.
07:16More?
07:17I'm going to induce myself banging away on that keyboard all day every day.
07:22Uh, Julie.
07:23What?
07:23Send a copy to the liaison officer for the Ramblers' Association.
07:26I'm keeping them au fait with developments.
07:28Yeah, yeah.
07:29Right, Colleen.
07:30Your two walks, please.
07:31Great, Mr Bridges.
07:32The first one has something for nature lovers, as well as those of a scientific bend.
07:37As we perambulate from the sewage works to the abattoir.
07:42Might have limited appeal, Colleen.
07:44What about the second one?
07:45Ah, now that one is very different.
07:47That one runs from the abattoir to the sewage works.
07:51Gives you an entirely different perspective.
07:53And you've taken down some notes, have you?
07:55All detailed notes, Mr Bridges.
07:58Unfortunately, this bit here might be a little bit difficult to read.
08:01You see, as I was jotting down my notes in the offal room,
08:05I happened to step on a piece of stray bovine liver,
08:08which is a lot slippier than you might think,
08:11and found myself inexorably propelled into a vat of steaming entrails.
08:17Hence the slight discoloration round there.
08:20Colleen, I'll read what I can and give you an answer by Thursday.
08:23Whatever you think, Mr Bridges.
08:24You see, what we're concentrating on now, Colleen, is historical walks.
08:29Whitbury through the ages.
08:30Whitbury in bygone days.
08:31With a Whitbury.
08:33See this, Matt Peer?
08:34This is Whitbury before the leisure centre was even built.
08:36Look, just fields, orchards.
08:40And what's this?
08:41A public right of way?
08:44Colleen, we have a problem.
08:47So, if St Mark's is over there, and the railway line is over there,
08:53that means the public right of way must come around there,
08:56then through a section...
08:59What is it, Carol?
09:02Speak up.
09:02Well, I know you said I wasn't to say anything till I'd spoken to my legal representative, Miss Briss.
09:07That was only with regard to matters pertaining to my enquiry vis-a-vis the poster.
09:11This is to do with the poster, Miss Briss.
09:13Right, better keep shtum, get a lawyer.
09:14But he even said him.
09:18Hello there.
09:21You're Carol's solicitor, are you?
09:23No, I'm a plumber.
09:25Carol, I don't think this man is qualified to represent you.
09:27No, no.
09:29Is this you?
09:30It's me.
09:32Sorry.
09:34The photograph there.
09:35That's me.
09:36I'm the face in the crowd.
09:45Got any proof of that?
09:47What do you mean, proof?
09:50That's me, with my family.
09:52I've only got your word for that.
09:53I need some sort of corroboration.
09:56Well, use your eyes, it's bloody obvious.
10:00Don't adopt that tone with me, thank you very much.
10:02An extremely valuable prize is on offer, and I need to know I've got the right person.
10:07And frankly, you've done your claim no good at all by coming in here and posing as her lawyer.
10:12Come on, Colin, you've got a path to follow.
10:15No, I'd much rather be a chef.
10:16Oh, stressful.
10:17Oh, I panic a lot.
10:19Well, my problem is, you see, I've got...
10:22I've got anarachnophobia.
10:24Oh, you're frightened of spiders.
10:25No, I'm frightened of men in anorachs.
10:28You can't be frightened of men in anorachs.
10:31Oh, well, I am.
10:31I used to have these nightmares when I was little.
10:33The child psychiatrist said it was to do with death.
10:36The grim reaper, the hooded figure, anorachs.
10:38I just panic.
10:39Well, meditation could certainly help with that.
10:42It can give you a sense of inner peace.
10:45You could look on it as a kind of stress.
10:47Man is...
10:49Moon maidens!
10:53And then it goes over this way, through this door, and then it goes straight on through this wall.
11:04Whoa!
11:05Colin, it's going to have to come down.
11:06But behind this wall is the ladies' toilet.
11:09It can't be helped, Colin.
11:11This is the public footpath right of way, and it's my legal obligation to make sure the public have unfettered
11:16access to it.
11:18For a start, I'm sure the Ramblers Association will want to exercise their rights.
11:21And rumble through the ladies?
11:23Indeed, Colin.
11:24And you know what they're like? A militant bunch.
11:26As soon as they find out about it, they're through here like a dose of salt.
11:29Ah, but how are they going to find out?
11:30I'm going to have to tell them, Colin.
11:33Moon maiden, you're the only woman I ever really wanted.
11:37I spent years looking for you. I'd given up hope.
11:40Oh, come on. It's just a one-night stand.
11:43Oh, really? That night was magical.
11:46I was devastated when you'd left in the morning without saying a word.
11:49I didn't know where you'd gone.
11:50It's Grimsby, I think. I had a holiday job at the canning factory.
11:55You do remember that night, don't you?
11:57Oh, yes. Most of it.
12:00I expect.
12:01What do you remember?
12:03Well, we met at a party, didn't we?
12:05No. I took you to the party. We met at a folk club.
12:09Did we?
12:10And the bonfire on the beach?
12:11Oh, yes. And there was lots of singing and dancing.
12:14Yeah. We clicked straight away, didn't we?
12:18Well, not straight away. I mean, we waited till after the party.
12:24And do you remember on the beach, everyone waving lighters in the air and giving us their blessing?
12:29Yeah, they did that sort of thing in those days, didn't they?
12:31Was that when that old hippie friend of yours pretended to marry us?
12:35The Reverend Jackson, yeah.
12:37The Reverend Jackson. Why did you call him that?
12:39Because that's what he was.
12:42Still is.
12:44Actually, he's the Bishop of Maidstone now.
12:47You mean it was real?
12:48Well, of course.
12:50You're my wife, Moon Maiden.
12:54What about me?
12:55What about Gordon? And the children? I've got a ring.
12:59I've been to marriage guidance.
13:01Not with me.
13:02No.
13:04What was your name, by the way?
13:07Harry.
13:08Harry Johnson.
13:11Pleased to meet you, Harry.
13:12I'm Helen Brittis.
13:14No, I suppose I'm Helen Johnson, Brittis.
13:19So you're saying there's a public footpath running through here and anyone can walk along it?
13:24Precisely.
13:25Without paying to come in, Mr. Brittis?
13:28Now we're at the nub of it.
13:29Any member of the public wishing to use leisure centre facilities must pay in the usual way.
13:35Any member of the public wishing to use the public right of way does not need to pay in any
13:39way.
13:40But any member of the public using the public right of way and then straying into leisure centre facilities
13:45would then have to pay in the usual way.
13:48Which is why Colin is down there at this precise moment marking out the route clearly.
13:53It runs through reception, through the staff restroom.
13:56Through the staff restroom?
13:57Hey, that's cool.
13:58Oh!
13:58Through the ladies' toilets.
14:00Through the ladies' toilets?
14:01Now that is what you call an inconvenience.
14:03Nice one, Tim.
14:04Yo!
14:05What's coming to you?
14:06In a piece.
14:07What if someone wants to spend a penny?
14:09Ah, then they have to spend £1.80, the normal admission fee.
14:13No!
14:14I mean, what if you're in there and people start walking through?
14:17Ah, now that is why I'm introducing a system of stewarding along the route
14:21so that in addition to your normal jobs you'll all be marshals or stewards for your own particular area.
14:28Is this the silly internal inquiry you've been talking about?
14:32No, it is not, Mrs Bidmead.
14:34Regrettably, I've had to put that on hold because another matter has superseded it, but I will be resuming it
14:39in due course.
14:40You know, you're a very sad man.
14:44Well, I'm not very happy with you, Mrs Bidmead.
14:47Well, what have you called me up here for, then?
14:49I'm not going over old ground. Gavin will fill you in later.
14:51Now, that really would be a first.
14:53Yo!
14:55You on drugs?
14:56No, I've been meditating.
14:59Look, here you are. It's me.
15:03Satisfied now.
15:04How dare you burst into my office in a semi-naked state? Who do you think you are?
15:10Is this you? It's me. I'm him.
15:12I missed something.
15:13I'm sorry, you bear no resemblance at all to the man in the photograph. For a start, he's been swimming,
15:19he's got wet hair.
15:21Well, would it help if I wet myself?
15:27Gavin, escort this man from the premises, please. He's an obvious imposter. Do this sort of thing for a living,
15:32do you?
15:33What sort of thing?
15:34I suppose you're one of those professional look-alikes.
15:37Well, frankly, you're no good at it. You're supposed to look like someone famous. Gavin, chuck him out.
15:42Yes, Mr Bidmead. I'll be back.
15:44Who has? Princess Diana?
15:48Colin! Colin!
15:54A cup of tea for you?
15:57A cup of tea would be most welcome.
16:00I've been here since 4am. I'm clearing the path of all obstructions.
16:04I hope I didn't disturb you at all.
16:06No, not at all. I've been up most of the night with Ben. Actually, I'm rather pleased. He's got the
16:12chicken pox.
16:12Oh, good.
16:13He's covered in spots. He's more spot than Ben at the moment.
16:17From now on, Carol, he'll be immune. He's building up his antibodies. It's something I try to do myself.
16:23What is?
16:24Antibody building. I try to do myself a disease on a regular basis so that I can build up an
16:30immunity to it.
16:31As I always say, a disease a day keeps the doctor away.
16:36You're giving Ben a fine start in life.
16:40As a matter of fact, I've got something for him.
16:42That's very kind.
16:47Here we are.
16:52Foot and mouth disease.
16:54Spine fever.
16:55Anthrax.
16:56Sorry.
16:57I've had them all myself, Carol.
16:58And if you'd like Ben to have them, I'd be only too pleased to give him a dose.
17:02No, no, no, thank you.
17:03It's very kind.
17:05But no, thank you.
17:06As you wish.
17:07But if you are thinking of vaccinations in the future, remember, I can lay my hand on most diseases.
17:17Meditation really sets me up for the day.
17:20Fills me with get up and go.
17:22Well, it hasn't filled Tim with get up and go, has it?
17:24It's filled him with sit down and stop.
17:27Tim, can you help, please?
17:29Oh, no, thanks.
17:29I'm fine.
17:30I'm preparing for the class.
17:31I'm emptying my hair.
17:32Well, that won't take long, will it?
17:34Look, just get off your butt and help Linda.
17:36Calm down, Gavin.
17:38What you need is some stress management.
17:40If it wasn't management, I wouldn't get the stress, would I?
17:43Oh, hello.
17:44Is this where they're doing the meditation class?
17:46Yes.
17:46Are you going to join us?
17:47Well, yes.
17:48I thought I might give it a try.
17:49You know him, don't you?
17:49You're the teacher.
17:50Yes, we have met under different circumstances.
17:53You'll find it very good.
17:54Very thorough.
17:55Gets down to the nitty gritty.
17:57Yeah.
17:58What was it you called you?
17:59Oh, I don't know.
18:01Moon Maiden.
18:02Yes, that was it.
18:03Why did he call you that?
18:05Well, years ago at a wedding, somebody said Moon Maiden, and apparently I did.
18:14I have spoken to the Ramblers Association and they will be exercising their rights to walk
18:20the path during the course of the afternoon.
18:22I had no choice.
18:25I realise your position as borough engineer means that you've got to approve all alterations
18:31to the centre, but I was faced with a legal obligation.
18:34What else could I do?
18:37I will treat that suggestion with a contempt it deserves.
18:41I'm doing this tape of yours.
18:43Walk number 38.
18:45Good.
18:46Now do you want me to type it all out?
18:48Yes, please.
18:48Including, oi, are you the pillock who runs the leisure centre?
18:52Pardon?
18:53And how do you spell urgh?
18:55Julie, what are you talking about?
18:57You know the bit where he thumps you.
18:59Julie, use your common sense.
19:01Confine yourself to my descriptive passages, please.
19:04Right.
19:05Oh, by the way, there's a pervert running amok in the ladies' toilet.
19:10Now come on, Ben.
19:12Pink's a lovely colour.
19:13It suits you.
19:14Look, don't do with Mummy.
19:16Just put on the calamine lotion.
19:18Oh!
19:19Mr Richards!
19:20Not now, Carol.
19:21I've had a pervert alert.
19:22Oi!
19:28Now that is just plain pathetic.
19:32I want the prize.
19:34I want it now.
19:41Tony!
19:46Tony!
19:51I'm on top of it now, Mr Bridas.
19:53I'm getting on famously with this little beauty.
19:56Can you hear that, Mr Bridas?
19:58Colin, I've just had a report there's a pervert in the ladies.
20:01I'll get him out for you, Mr Bridas.
20:03No, Colin.
20:04They think you're the pervert.
20:09It's all right, madam.
20:10There's nothing to be alarmed about.
20:12My deputy manager was merely sawing his way through the toilet.
20:16You see, I'm afraid that you are, at this precise moment,
20:19on a public right-of-way.
20:21But you can come out now, it's quite safe.
20:25I'm telling you.
20:27I want it.
20:29Now!
20:32He has blown it up out of all proportion.
20:36Yes, he does that.
20:37He is so petty, small-minded, childish.
20:41He's such...
20:42I'm sorry, I shouldn't talk about your husband like that.
20:45Oh, it's OK.
20:45He's not my husband.
20:47Well, of course he is my husband.
20:49We are married, but not legally.
20:51What do you mean?
20:52For someone else.
20:54My first...
20:54Well, no!
20:55My first, first husband.
20:57I've forgotten all about him.
20:58It turns out, I'm a bigamist.
21:02I've met the man I was married to before I was married to,
21:05the man I was married to before I was married to Gordon.
21:08Sorry, you've lost me.
21:09Yeah, I've lost me too, but it has its good side.
21:11It means I'm probably not married to Gordon.
21:13What are you going to do?
21:15I don't know.
21:16I don't know what I'm going to do.
21:18What would you do?
21:19Do you mean, would I leave Gordon?
21:20Yeah.
21:21And go off with someone else?
21:22A man I had forgotten all about?
21:25A man who is, in fact, a complete stranger?
21:28Yeah.
21:29Yeah, I'd leave Gordon.
21:32Walk up there and you'll be all right.
21:34The paramedic was exaggerating.
21:36People recover from catatonic states all the time.
21:39Now, put that arrow down there, please,
21:41to signify the path goes into the restroom.
21:44Stop that, then.
21:45That's a silly place to put a thermometer.
21:50Right, Carol.
21:51If that phony lawyer comes back fraudulently claiming the prize,
21:54I want to know about it.
21:55Yes, Miss Bruce.
21:55Miss Bruce, I know your inquiry is on hold,
21:58but, you see, it wasn't my pen.
22:01It was Ben's pen.
22:03Whoa.
22:05Trying to lay the blame on a child, Carol.
22:07It won't wash, you know.
22:09It will, Miss Bruce.
22:10It's water washable.
22:11It's gone.
22:12Where's the poster gone?
22:13I don't know, Mr Bruce.
22:14I haven't seen anything.
22:15I've been here taking Ben's temperature.
22:17Right, Carol.
22:18A tannoy announcement, please.
22:19Any member of staff who knows anything about
22:22the disappearance of the poster
22:23is to report to me immediately.
22:26I'm prepared to grant a two-hour amnesty,
22:28and within that period,
22:29I expect Mrs Big Me to own up.
22:31Yes, Miss Bruce.
22:32Hello.
22:33Any member of staff who knows anything about
22:35the disappearance of the poster
22:36is to report to me immediately.
22:37I'm prepared to grant a two-hour amnesty,
22:39And one-
22:46Harry, Harry, Harry.
22:48Harry.
22:49Harry, hari.
22:50Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy, Hardy.
23:14Jamie, Jamie, arms wide open, head back, a bit lower.
23:18Steph, okay.
23:24So Mrs Bidmead didn't take it?
23:26Not as far as I know, Mr British, no.
23:28Why, everybody, positions!
23:29I might have known, it's you!
23:32That's what I've been trying to tell you!
23:35So now you've added theft to your list of criminal activities, have you?
23:39That poster is Leisure Centre property.
23:41It's also central to an inquiry that I'm currently...
23:46You've really done it now!
23:48How can I continue my inquiry now that you've destroyed the vital evidence?
23:52You are guilty of perverting the course of justice, so I have no alternative but to ban you from this
23:59Leisure Centre for the rest of your natural life.
24:03Mr British, hit a bit of a snag.
24:08Unfortunately, Gavin, I can't close it off, it's a public right of way.
24:11But there's foot and mouth disease in there, and swine fever!
24:14And anthrax.
24:15Anthrax is lethal!
24:17No, no Gavin, it's not that bad.
24:19I was a bit chesty with it for the first routine.
24:22Of course, the malignant pustules were a bit irritating.
24:25Especially the one right on the end of my...
24:27Yes, thank you, Colin.
24:30So you're telling me that in there at the moment these serums are inert?
24:33Yes, Mr British.
24:35You're nerdish.
24:36Oh, my God!
24:37Right, Carol, no more admissions from now on, please.
24:40What about the Ramblers, Miss British?
24:42Initiate emergency procedure 34B.
24:44Ah, the Veruca code.
24:46Precisely.
24:48I think you have to come away with me.
24:51Don't you see?
24:51We were meant for each other.
24:53Look, I just don't know, Harry.
24:56But...
24:56But if I were to come with you, it would just be for a trial period,
25:00say, three, four, maybe five years.
25:04Oh, moon-made.
25:06Well, no, I haven't.
25:08Welcome to the Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre European Walk for Health.
25:15Now, anyone ever had foot-and-mouth disease?
25:18Swine fever?
25:19And...
25:21All right, form an orderly queue in that direction, please.
25:24Carol, spray them.
25:27Right, Gavin.
25:28Get ready to take them through the dip, please.
25:30Yes, Mr British.
25:32Colin, over to you.
25:35Good afternoon.
25:36Lovely day for a walk.
25:39Don't worry about me.
25:40I'm immune.
25:42Miss Ritters.
25:43Julie.
25:44What does rescinded mean?
25:46Rescinded, it means repealed, revoked, cancelled.
25:49Oh, right.
25:50Well, the Chief Planning Office has been on,
25:52and he says that's what's happened to your public right of way.
25:54It was repealed, cancelled and fingered when the Leisure Centre was built.
25:58Ah-ha.
25:59Right.
26:00He also said you were cretinous.
26:02But it's all right, I know what that means.
26:04You know what the implications are?
26:06Indeed I do, Gavin.
26:07It means all those people are here without having paid.
26:10Get rid of them.
26:11Yes, Mr Carson.
26:13We're gonna have to tell him, you know.
26:15What, Gordon?
26:16Do we have to?
26:18Yes.
26:19He won't like it.
26:21Trust me.
26:24Think nothing.
26:27Think everything.
26:29Think darkness.
26:31Think light.
26:34Yo.
26:43Oh, God, no.
26:45It's the hooded figure.
26:46It's death.
26:47He's come for me.
26:48I'm panicking.
26:49I'm panicking.
26:51I'm panicking.
26:52I'm panicking.
26:52Out you go, please.
26:53Hey, Gordon.
26:54In a moment, my darling.
26:55I'm just getting rid of these trespassers.
26:58Out you go, please.
26:59Out you go.
27:00Out you go, there.
27:02Right, Gavin.
27:03We are now in a position to close the centre on the grounds that it is, in fact, a plague
27:08zone.
27:08Right, Mr Chris.
27:09Right.
27:10Gordon, could you come here a minute, please?
27:12Yes, my angel.
27:14Look, I don't know quite how to put this down, but I've decided...
27:17Oi, panock!
27:18I've had enough.
27:19You are banned for life.
27:22Gavin, I thought we'd thrown him out.
27:23You can't ban me.
27:25I'm on a public right away.
27:28No!
27:30That is where you are wrong, Squire.
27:33Gavin, eject him forthwith.
27:34I'm panicking!
27:35I'm panicking!
27:36I'm panicking!
27:37I'm panicking!
27:37I've seen him!
27:38The Grim Reaper!
27:39We're all gonna die!
27:40I'm gonna get him!
27:45I think you've killed him!
27:48My heart's burnt!
27:50What?
27:51My heart's burnt!
27:53What?
27:55So, it's finally come to this.
27:58In a desperate attempt to claim the prize,
28:01you've killed the real winner!
28:03Hell no more for the sheep dip!
28:05Colin, call the police.
28:08With pleasure, Mr Brittus.
28:09We're finally going to arrest Mrs Bigmead, are we?
28:13What?
28:14No!
28:15Oop!
28:16What?
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