- 1 day ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:01On the Dukes, strange things happen in Hazard
00:04when convicts take the Dukes hostage and Boss takes over the Dukes mortgage.
00:34Just a good old boy, never meaning no harm, beats all you've never saw, been in trouble
00:44with the law since the day they was born, straightening the curves, flattening the hills, someday
00:56the mountain might get them, but the law never will, making their way the only way they
01:05know how, that's just a little bit more than the law will allow, just a good old boy, wouldn't
01:17change if they could, fighting the system like a two modern day Robin Hood.
01:31Boy and Luke Duke know every highway, road, and cow path in Hazard County so well that
01:36they could probably drive them blindfolded.
01:38You know, a lot of folks have wondered why the Duke boys keep hanging around Hazard.
01:43Well, one reason is life in Hazard is plumb full of surprises.
01:49The Flash, now watch your, your superior leader here.
01:52This is my finest, we're gonna make a fortune, I'm not kidding you, we're gonna make a fortune
01:57on this doodad.
01:58I'm telling you, Flash, we're gonna be up to your nose in steaks and caviar.
02:03I love caviar.
02:05Do I know it?
02:11Well, cousin, for once we can just kind of take it easy and kick back.
02:14Yeah, we ought to make it to the bank by three with no sweat.
02:18On your tippy toes, I think I hear one.
02:23Good news, good news, it's the Duke.
02:28What in the world?
02:33Dang it, that red light just popped right out of that tree.
02:37Like a big old apple, huh?
02:39You can just guess who did the planting, too.
02:40I told you it'd work.
02:41Woo-hoo!
02:47Hold on, Flashy!
02:53I tell you, Flash, the police works my life.
02:55Good!
03:04Get away!
03:05Get away!
03:06Get away!
03:13Did you see what I'd see?
03:14I always suspected Roscoe was a mite backwards, but this is ridiculous.
03:18Ha-ha!
03:19Come on, let's get out.
03:20We got that right.
03:23The girls are getting them in reverse.
03:25Well, you'll kick them in reverse then.
03:28Keep a lookout now.
03:30Come on, Luke.
03:32Hey, he can't go very fast backwards.
03:38Now, them dooks don't know it yet, but this prison car taking a shortcut to the Federal Slammer
03:43in Atlanta is going to land them in more trouble than Custard Hat Indians.
03:57In reverse, I don't care.
04:11Now, that's Mars.
04:21Now, that's Mars.
04:23Well, we did it.
04:24We finally treed old Roscoe.
04:26We'd better get back there and give them a hand before the squirrels get at them.
04:35Randall!
04:39Randall!
04:41Randall, you trying to get up killed?
04:46Oh, Clayman, you all right, Matt?
04:48Yeah.
04:49Look at him.
04:51Randall!
04:54He's out of it.
04:55He's out of it.
04:56A team!
05:00Give me up, man.
05:02Yeah.
05:03Yeah.
05:03That's all set.
05:04Give it a shot.
05:05All right.
05:06It's all right, Flash.
05:07It's all right, Drew.
05:16Shoot, ain't gonna work.
05:19Come on, come on!
05:21Oh, he comes to.
05:26That's a C.B. Wyatt.
05:28That's a C.B. Wyatt.
05:29All right.
05:32Get the bag.
05:33Come on.
05:37Well, we're off to a good start.
05:39Two dangerous felons on the loose, and the chief law officer is up a tree.
05:45Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
05:50Good driving, girl.
05:52All right.
05:52Oh, ho, ho, what a horrendous.
05:54I don't know whether, geez, you're going up or coming down.
05:57Yeah.
05:58Out of the way.
05:59Out of the way.
05:59All right.
06:00You are in one piece, Roscoe?
06:02Flash is in a state.
06:03Her nose has gone dry.
06:05Oh, she'll walk it off, Roscoe.
06:07So is mine.
06:08Me?
06:09We've got to get back into town.
06:10Got to leave the bank by three.
06:11Right.
06:12Jesse's making a mortgage payment.
06:13We're going to celebrate.
06:14You just wait a purple pea-picking minute here.
06:16You ain't going nowhere.
06:17I'm going to write you a citation for running that red light back there.
06:20Roscoe, come on.
06:21That was a phony light.
06:22They don't put lights in trees.
06:23Hush!
06:23Don't make no difference.
06:24I'm going to give you a citation.
06:25Get free right there.
06:26All right.
06:27Wait a minute.
06:27Wait.
06:28Grab another cut.
06:29Did you?
06:30Oh.
06:31Did you freeze?
06:32Good.
06:33Oh.
06:33I caught him once backwards.
06:35I'll do it again.
06:36Good, good, good.
06:40All right.
06:40Hang on.
06:46Cover your ears, Slash.
06:48I don't want a lady to hear what I'm about to say.
06:51Good, good.
06:52Baby, this is J.D. Hall.
06:54Give me my bank, please.
06:55Over the bank.
06:56This is me.
06:57Did Jesse Duke show up at the bank yet?
07:00Mmm.
07:00Good, good.
07:01There's only 30 minutes to go.
07:03Now, listen.
07:04At 3 p.m. sharp, you bang them front doors shut.
07:11One of these days, Jesse Duke is going to miss his mortgage payment.
07:14And I just got me a feeling today might be that very day.
07:21Here you go, girl.
07:23You're going to have to hold it until we get back from town.
07:26Come on, Daisy.
07:2620 minutes to 3.
07:28We're cutting it short.
07:30Come on, Jesse.
07:32Say, do you have the mortgage money?
07:34Right here.
07:34I wouldn't go to town without it.
07:36Okay.
07:37Just checking.
07:40Jess, hold it.
07:41You folks ain't going nowhere.
07:45What's going on here?
07:46Just climb down on it.
07:47They will tell you, puppy.
07:49Here we go.
07:52That's real smart, Uncle.
07:54Real smart.
07:56Hey, you say something about some mortgage money.
07:58All right.
07:59You got the money?
08:00Just let her go.
08:01I'll behave.
08:02Well, there goes the farm.
08:05And things are just starting.
08:12Cusco held us up longer than I thought he did.
08:15Well, I'm going to be a mite late.
08:16Put the pedal to the metal, cousin.
08:18Let's go.
08:18My best.
08:22Old Cooter was cruising the Duke trails, looking for debris,
08:26which was good business and hazard.
08:50And while the guard from the state prison was telling old Cooter
08:53all about them escaped convicts,
08:55back in town there was one very happy fat man.
08:59Three o'clock!
09:00Three o'clock!
09:01It's three o'clock, Uncle Vern!
09:04Close them doors tight and lock them up good.
09:07The bank is closed.
09:09And Jesse Duke is forked it on his mortgage.
09:15I got me a farm!
09:17Baby Hog has a farm.
09:20E-I-E-O!
09:22There's always, always got some sheep.
09:24E-I-E-O!
09:26With a bag here, I love it.
09:28In a bar, in a bar, in a little bubble.
09:29Oh, Baby Hog has a farm.
09:33E-I-E-E-E-A!
09:36Own it!
09:44It's a minute after three.
09:45Yeah, that bank's closed up tight.
09:47Let's see if it's Jesse's truck.
09:48Where do you suppose he and Daisy are?
09:49No, try him on a CB.
09:51Shepard, this is Lost Sheep.
09:53Shepard, Lost Sheep.
09:54Shepard, you have to...
09:57I ain't like him to miss a payment like this.
09:59For sure, well...
10:02Lost Sheep to Shepard, you got your ears on.
10:03Come back.
10:04J.D. Hog has a farm.
10:06E-I-E-O!
10:07And on this farm, he got some P-O-C-E-I-E-O!
10:11Where they're only going here and they're only going there.
10:13Here and they're only going there and they're only going there and they're only going...
10:15Hey, boss, have you seen our Uncle Jesse?
10:17No, no Uncle Jesse.
10:19No current mortgage payment.
10:21And now that 3 p.m. has come and gone,
10:23you dudes ain't got no farm.
10:26Just hold on a second.
10:27Now, something must have happened to Uncle Jesse.
10:29You know that.
10:29You gotta cut him a half hour slack or so, don't you?
10:31Where does it say that?
10:33Oh, come on, boss.
10:34You can't take Uncle Jesse's farm away from him.
10:36The farm's been our family for generations.
10:38Ain't that a crime shame, then?
10:40Well, now it's my said duty to go seek out your Uncle Jesse
10:43and serve him with his foreclosure notice
10:46and make that farm my own.
10:48Well, time's a-wasting.
10:49Dainty horse made the farm.
10:51E-I-E-O!
10:53And on this farm, he got some P-O-C-E-I-E-O!
11:00So here's the lost sheep calling a shepherd.
11:02Come in, shepherd.
11:04It's the lost sheep calling a shepherd.
11:05This here's an emergency.
11:06Come back.
11:08Now, look, you fellas got the money and everything.
11:10Why don't you just hit the road before the law shows up?
11:13Of course, we kind of like it here.
11:15This is a nice, cozy little place.
11:17Now, move it.
11:18Yeah.
11:19How about fix this a little child, sugar?
11:22I'm not hungry.
11:24Feisty little filly, ain't ya?
11:25Oh, fix it yourself!
11:26Now, Daisy, Daisy, Daisy, it's all right.
11:28I'll help you fix it.
11:47Boss, we're in a hurry now.
11:48Get out of the way.
11:49You ain't passing me.
11:51Don't hurry, boss.
11:52You're messing with an old root brother.
11:54That's what you are.
11:54I'm trying to, dang it.
12:06It's a little early for boss to be hitting the haine.
12:10All right, let's move.
12:16There's Winnie and Bob, left over from last night's square dance.
12:20Hey, hey, hey!
12:21What's going on here?
12:23This ain't no drive-in movie.
12:25Come on, shoot!
12:26You know where Daddy's been looking for him.
12:29Now, this thing won't start at all.
12:32What the time is, what's the matter with it?
12:35Well, that younger generation,
12:36by the way, the children...
12:40Hey, please!
12:51Somebody's coming.
12:53Not a sound out of you.
12:58Pickup's still here.
12:59Uncle Jesse ain't took sick.
13:02Uncle Jesse!
13:04Uncle Jesse!
13:04There you are!
13:06This is what we hear down the line.
13:07I'm making no sense.
13:09Put him up, country, boys.
13:10And don't try to think cute.
13:12Uh, no, I wouldn't think of it.
13:15Go for it, Luke!
13:16Now, go for it, Luke, usually means trouble.
13:25You ain't running nowhere.
13:31Hammer!
13:31Hammer!
13:32Cool it!
13:33Lucky wise guy!
13:36You all right?
13:37Yeah, yeah.
13:38How about you two?
13:38You okay?
13:39We're fine.
13:39Now, you got the mortgage money,
13:40but that don't make no never mind.
13:42It must have come from that station
13:43when you saw it turned over down the creek.
13:45Oh, Elma, you ain't as dumb as you look.
13:47Listen, you got what you want.
13:48Now, why don't you leave us alone?
13:49You gotta be kidding, plow boy.
13:51We want our way to the federal penitentiary.
13:53Roads must be crawling with law by now.
13:55We're laying low right here.
13:56We figure a way out.
13:58I'm gonna take them to another room,
13:59and if they move a finger, waste them.
14:02Get!
14:03Come on, plow boy.
14:08We're gonna have to get out of here and get some help.
14:09I know it.
14:11Sit.
14:12Yeah.
14:13All right.
14:13Such a yap.
14:15Yes, sir.
14:19Hey, that's what?
14:20What'd I say?
14:21Go, go!
14:22Well, I'm going.
14:23What's the matter?
14:24I'm going.
14:24You know, you infuriate me.
14:27I said go slow.
14:29Clean it.
14:29Shut it down.
14:30What's the matter with that?
14:31Shut it down.
14:33What's the matter with you?
14:34What do you mean, what's the matter with me?
14:35When I said go slow, I meant go slow.
14:37Get the chain off.
14:37Malcolm, I gotta do everything.
14:38I totally tore the transmission right out of my vehicle.
14:42Now, let's see if this dirty thing goes strong.
14:53That's a good, kid.
14:58Let's get a hit-up.
15:00I'll get it.
15:03Oh...
15:04Oh...
15:04Oh...
15:05Oh...
15:05Oh...
15:07Oh...
15:07Oh...
15:07Oh...
15:07Oh...
15:08Oh...
15:08Oh...
15:10Oh...
15:13Oh...
15:14This is Roscoe, P.E. Coltrane.
15:17Roscoe, where the devil are you at?
15:19You sound like you're sitting down in a boiling hot tub.
15:22Ho, ho, ho, ho!
15:23All right, all right, all right, all right, never mind.
15:26Listen, meet me at the Duke farm, and I mean on the double.
15:29I'm foreclosing on the place, and there may be trouble.
15:32Over and out.
15:33That's a 10-4.
15:34We're on.
15:45I'm real sorry about this, Sheriff.
15:47That's one thing I agree about.
15:48You were the sorriest deputy that ever breathed.
15:50Now, get in your vehicle, and take Old Court down,
15:53and don't even come near my vehicle.
15:55All right, I want my vehicle any more than this.
15:57Scott, did you?
15:58I hate you.
16:00That's not nice.
16:23Roscoe, we got a problem.
16:25What?
16:25Escape B.
16:26The problem was them two escaped cons.
16:29Old Roscoe told the guard that he was in hot pursuit at the moment.
16:33He had Radio Cletus and loaned him a patrol car.
16:35You mean here in Hasbro?
16:37Oh, good news, good news.
16:39Hot pursuit.
16:46Hey, Lehman, look at this.
16:49In them plowboys' closet.
16:52Take your picture.
16:52Wait a minute, then there's our clothes.
16:55Hold it, hold it.
16:57Someone's coming.
16:59Not a sound out of you.
17:04Honk.
17:06Who is that?
17:07That's, uh, J.D. Hogg.
17:10He's one of the town bigwigs.
17:13All right, Hammer, take them two in back.
17:15Get.
17:16Sir.
17:17Remove.
17:18All right.
17:19All right, now listen.
17:20You get rid of him and no funny business.
17:22I'll be watching you like a hulk.
17:26Yeah.
17:28Yeah.
17:32Oh, my, oh, my.
17:35J.D. Hogg has a farm.
17:38Yeah, yeah, oh.
17:52Well, good day to you, Jesse and Daisy.
17:56It's a fine day today, ain't it?
17:58A wonderful day.
17:59Fact is, I've been waiting for this day for a long, long time.
18:03I bet you have.
18:04Jesse Duke, I hereby serve you with a foreclosure notice for failure to pay your mortgage payments on time.
18:11And I hereby request you to evacuate my farm immediately.
18:15Uh, J.D., you can't kick us out because we got nowhere to go.
18:19And we did try and make the mortgage payments, but something came up that we just didn't figure on, boss.
18:23Yeah, so, J.D., why don't you just run on back to town and get in that little office of
18:28yours, and we'll be in to see you next week, and we can talk this whole thing over.
18:32Mm-mm, mm-mm, mm-mm.
18:33Just get your hands off of me, Jesse.
18:35As of 3 p.m. today, this farm is mine.
18:38And I ain't leaving.
18:40No, sirree, boss.
18:41You all are.
18:43Boss, you wouldn't like farm life.
18:45Now, just get out of here.
18:46It's for your own good.
18:47Oh, for my own good?
18:49That's right.
18:49Listen, you ain't threatening me, are you?
18:51No, we ain't threatening you.
18:53J.D., just get out.
18:55That's the best thing for you.
18:56Oh, listen, Jesse, you can jaw at me all you want.
18:59I still am not leaving.
19:05Well, you made your choice, fatty.
19:07Welcome to the party.
19:08Hey, what's going on here?
19:09You dukes are trying to pull a fast one on me, ain't you?
19:12Well, who the heck do you think you are all dressed up like a jailbird?
19:16J.D., he is a jailbird.
19:18Who I am ain't none of your business, you overstuffed beanbag.
19:22You in it with the rest of them now.
19:24I tried to tell you, you stubborn mule, to get out of here, but you wouldn't listen.
19:28Hammer, bring them other two in here.
19:34See here, gentlemen, I am J.D. Hall, county commissioner of Harrison County,
19:38and I have no connection in any way, shape, or form with these here dukes.
19:41So, if you fellas have any problem with them, I'll leave you now to work it out among the...
19:45Just hold it. Get back over there, blimp, before I let out your hot air.
19:59Okay, Rue, you bought it.
20:02Listen, fella, you can still leave. You're getting in this awful deep.
20:06As deep as you, fella. You're heading for six feet under.
20:15Sounds like Cletus.
20:17No, it's more like Roscoe.
20:18Well, whoever it is, it's got to be the Harrison County Sheriff's Department.
20:21They work for me, so you better run for it while you can't.
20:25Didn't work.
20:27I knew it.
20:28It's split.
20:29No way. No way.
20:34No way.
20:34No, no, no, no, no, no.
20:35No way.
20:36No fucking dead efficient.
20:39Roscoe's driving is improving, ain't it?
20:42Dang, this has got to be the busiest place in town.
20:44Hammer!
20:45I want to keep an eye on those, too.
20:47You get Unk and the gal out of here.
20:48One little gal.
20:49Unk, move.
20:50Move it.
20:51Go on.
20:52Uh, say, my dear sir,
20:55if you'd just let me go,
20:56I could arrange for you to be let go in some way.
21:00Just sit down.
21:01All right, you two, get over there and sit down.
21:05Yes, sir.
21:06We're going.
21:07All right, I want you to act real natural
21:09and get rid of that chair before I start shooting, okay?
21:11You got it.
21:12You almost feel sorry for them old boys
21:15picking Hazard County to get trapped in.
21:17Here, I want to teach you how to foreclose.
21:19The secret of foreclosing is looking mean.
21:22You know how to look mean.
21:24You got to show your little fangs.
21:26Get them ready.
21:27You just snarled and snapped.
21:29Well, it sure is nice of you, Duke, to have seen the light
21:32and not make no fuss about this here foreclosing notice.
21:35Hey, boss. Hey, boss.
21:36Listen, Flash and me, we got here just as quick as we possibly could.
21:40All right.
21:41Are these guys giving you a hard time?
21:44Why should we be giving him a hard time?
21:46He's got us dead to rights.
21:47That's right.
21:47Jesse did not make that mortgage payment on time,
21:49so the farm legally belongs to boss.
21:51That's right.
21:51You might as well run along or ask everything's peaceful around here.
21:54Bye-bye. We're all normal.
21:55Very peaceful.
21:56You mean, you know something?
21:59I'm sure glad to see you Duke boys cooperating for just one time.
22:03Ain't that nice?
22:04Yeah.
22:05Listen, boss.
22:05You want to hear some good news?
22:07Yes.
22:07Oh, listen.
22:07There's some desperate convicts out there.
22:09And Flash and me, we're organizing a dog hunt.
22:12Man hunt.
22:13Oh, oh, oh.
22:14So if you don't mind, Flash and I, we'll just go on on,
22:17and we'll go out there and apprehend them.
22:19Oh, I don't mind. Go right now.
22:24She's sniffing at your, your closet there.
22:26You must have a humongous mouse in there.
22:28Well, don't worry about it, Roscoe.
22:30The cat will take care of it.
22:31You ain't got no cat.
22:33Well, we'll get one.
22:34Matter of fact, we'll get two.
22:35Why don't you just go hunt?
22:36Hot pursuit?
22:39Listen, I'll tell you something.
22:40When she, she's sniffing like that, there's gotta be something in there.
22:43Come on, Flag, darling.
22:44Let's go.
22:45Come on.
22:45Let's go.
22:46Come on.
22:46That's right.
22:47Take her and go.
22:48She wants to see what's in here.
22:49Don't do that.
22:50Don't do that.
22:51Don't do that.
22:52Don't do that.
22:54Well, guess you're just gonna have to join our little party too, chef.
22:58You're the convict, aren't you?
22:59Well, get a man a cigar.
23:00Get him up.
23:01Come on.
23:01Hammer, get in here fast.
23:03Well, hold the dog.
23:04No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
23:05Don't give this flea bag to me.
23:06You gotta hold the dog.
23:07I gotta get my hand up.
23:08Yeah!
23:10Hey!
23:10Hold on.
23:13Take a deep breath, Powerboy, and your gun.
23:20You know, the way things are going for that feller, I believe I'll just let him get away.
23:33Okay, Rube, out of the car.
23:34You got no car hoes.
23:35Out of the car!
23:38You try that one more time, and I won't be shooting at your tires next time.
23:41You got no call holding us prisoners.
23:42Get in our own house.
23:43Inside.
23:45Move it!
23:47But you take this dog and...
23:49Are you kidding me?
23:50I ain't going to put my hands down.
23:53Oh, you're right.
23:54Get over there.
23:55Now, listen up!
23:57You people are starting to get me ticked off.
23:59Now, I want you to hear this, and I want you to hear it real good.
24:02The next time any of you tries to bust out of here, we are not going to chase you.
24:06We're just going to shoot your dear little cousin Daisy here.
24:09Bang, bang, and she is gone.
24:10You understand that?
24:11Just hold on a second.
24:12Now, you don't have to do nothing crazy.
24:14Why don't you just take our clothes in the car and clear out of here?
24:16That sounds like the best bet for me.
24:18Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you, Plowboy?
24:19Well, you are not running things here.
24:21I am!
24:22And we're going to lay low right here for a long time.
24:24Now, you get over there and get that chow ready.
24:27Speaking of chow, I got me an appetite right now.
24:29I could eat an orange.
24:31Give me that!
24:33Get over here!
24:34Come here!
24:34What, yeah!
24:34She's talking to me.
24:35What do you say?
24:36Why, surely!
24:37Glad to!
24:39It tell me that you're the boss man around here.
24:42Oh, yeah, that I am.
24:43Yeah, he's the boss, all right.
24:44Would you please simply not getting this?
24:46Well, you're the boss.
24:46Yeah, and therefore, I am in a position to do something very good for you if you let me go.
24:52Yeah, and I'm his brother-in-law.
24:54Would you go away, please?
24:55Move on.
24:56Well, I am.
24:57Listen, how would you like a healthy cut of my pocket meter money?
25:00I mean, how would you like 50% of my 50% of his 50%?
25:04How would you like 100% of an unemployment check?
25:07Just do it.
25:07Just do it!
25:08Yeah!
25:08There is something you can do for me.
25:10Oh, yeah?
25:11Yeah.
25:11In there.
25:12In there.
25:13In there.
25:13Yeah, all right.
25:14I'm going.
25:15In here.
25:22All right, now, listen, with you and the sheriff out here, who's your next-in-command in town?
25:26My next-in-command?
25:27Oh, well, for better or worse, it's Deputy Cletus Hugg.
25:31All right, I want you to call him.
25:33Get Coco on.
25:34You tell him that he is in charge, and he is not to bother you or the sheriff.
25:39You tell him that the both of y'all are going to be out here at the Duke's farm for
25:42a couple of days,
25:42and that he is not to disturb you for anything.
25:46You got that?
25:47Hmm?
25:48Hmm.
25:49I can't remember the second part of what you said.
25:51I wasn't paying attention.
25:52I think you can remember it.
25:54Yeah, I remember.
25:55I remember.
25:56I remember that.
25:56Uh, but listen, after I make the call, uh, I want to talk to you about me.
26:01Snickers!
26:01Yeah, Mabel! Mabel!
26:03Mabel!
26:03Hey, Mabel!
26:04Oh, Mabel, Mabel, listen, listen, J.D. Hugg here.
26:07Uh, would you get me, uh, Deputy Cletus over at the booking office?
26:10Hello from Roscoe.
26:11Mr. Randall, there's a gun.
26:13Good.
26:15Keys to a spare patrol car.
26:17Thanks.
26:18Now I gotta round up them cons before they stir up some real trouble.
26:21All right.
26:21Good hunting.
26:22Yeah.
26:23Oh.
26:25Bye.
26:29Uh, Deputy Cletus Hogg speaking.
26:31Oh, hi, Cousin Boss.
26:32Listen, have I got something exciting to tell you.
26:34This prison car from the state pen was taking a shortcut through hazard.
26:37It had an accident, and both these cons escaped, and they're dangerous.
26:40I'm talking dangerous.
26:42Yeah, I know.
26:43I know.
26:43I know all about it.
26:44Uh, news travels fierce.
26:46And so, Boss told Cletus that he was in charge of the town while he and Roscoe was out at
26:51the Duke farm taking inventory.
26:53And old Cletus took to the news like a hungry boll weevil in a bale of cotton.
26:57You bet.
26:59Woo!
27:00Ha!
27:02Ha!
27:03All right, my fellow Hazardinians.
27:06Uh, Hazardites.
27:07Uh, people of hazard.
27:10Deputy Cletus Hogg is running this town now.
27:13And when I say jump, I want everybody to jump.
27:17And when I...
27:20Oh, no.
27:22Oh, no.
27:23Uh, help!
27:24I'm locked in somebody!
27:25Help!
27:27Yes!
27:35My note was unlocked all the time.
27:40Meanwhile, back at the farm, Lehman and Hammer were making themselves at home.
27:44Just like relatives, grabbing all the car keys, knocking out all the CBs, cutting the phone lines and borrowing clothes,
27:53just like cousins come for the summer.
27:58Get out to the bar and the bows and arrows are out there.
28:04Oh, I got an old shotgun out there, too, but it's too dangerous.
28:08Gotta try something.
28:09Hey, button it up, you two.
28:10And you remember, Plowboy, one of you tries to bust out of here again and the girl gets it.
28:19Is the truck coming this way?
28:35Now, about the only person who hadn't shown up was Cooter.
28:38And here he is.
28:43Oh, you got more company coming.
28:45Better put on another plate.
28:47Oh, that smells good.
28:49Hey, Cooter.
28:50How you doing?
28:51See, y'all got company.
28:53Yeah, uh, J.D. and Roscoe just happened by.
28:58I'm just sitting down to dinner, huh?
29:00Yeah, just this minute.
29:03Crawfish gumbo is my favorite.
29:06Yeah, it's mine, too.
29:07Yeah, mine.
29:09I've been so busy, I didn't have a chance to get no dinner.
29:12Oh, well, you're just working little fingers to the bone, ain't you, Cooter?
29:14Yeah, probably be too late for supper time I get home.
29:17Well, then you better hurry, Cooter.
29:18I want some of these hair biscuits.
29:20Go ahead, it's tough, boss.
29:22I need gravy, too.
29:27You know, Cooter, you're just an angel, and I want to thank you so much for bringing my Jeep out
29:32to me.
29:33Yeah, you need a little time, yeah.
29:35Bye.
29:36Adios, Cooter.
29:37Bye-bye, Cooter.
29:39Bye, that's right.
29:40Bye now.
29:40You on your head.
29:41Yeah, bye now.
29:42You're good to drive safe.
29:44Yeah.
29:47Now, if Daisy hadn't distracted him with that kiss, he'd have noticed that note in his pocket.
29:53Either that or old Cooter can't read.
30:23Meanwhile, not too far away.
30:24That prison guard fellow was out of one of their convicts his own self.
30:39You all right, Mr. Randall?
30:40Cooter, you're trying to pick up some more towing business?
30:43Sorry about that.
30:44I was a little distracted.
30:45You see any sign of them escapees?
30:47Not yet.
30:48I thought I'd check out the farms down along this way.
30:49I wasn't for them up there.
30:51That's a Duke place, and they ain't there.
30:52I was just there.
30:54Well, I'll head back up the other way.
30:56Cooter, you see anything, you let me know.
30:58These guys are bad news.
30:59We'll get them.
31:00Just hang tight on the seabody.
31:03The way their luck's going, it's a good thing they ain't playing cards for money.
31:10What do you think you're doing, you cow-chip?
31:12Them good biscuits.
31:13What?
31:13Don't feed them to no hound dog.
31:15Well, listen, Flay, she's starving.
31:16She hasn't eaten all day.
31:17Well, better she should starve than me.
31:18Well, listen, if she doesn't eat, she faints.
31:21Well, so do I.
31:22Give me them.
31:22Listen, Flay.
31:23Gentlemen.
31:23What you gonna eat?
31:24That's good.
31:25Allow me.
31:34Let's dump them all out there.
31:36Wait a minute, you can't do that.
31:37It's too cold out there.
31:38Yeah, there's nothing to sleep on in the barn.
31:42You can't do that to us.
31:43You can't throw us out of our own house.
31:44I can do anything I want.
31:45Oh, he's got a point to you.
31:47It's a good idea, Hammer.
31:48We can use the peace and quiet around here.
31:50They can take turns guarding them.
31:52Say, listen, my dear, sir.
31:53You know, I am county commissioner.
31:55And like I've been trying to tell you,
31:57my being incarcerated here is all a very ghastly mistake.
32:00Now, if you let me go, I'll tell you what I'll do.
32:03I'll give you a very healthy cut of my speed trip money.
32:07Listen, I'll let you play with my radar gun.
32:09Would you please?
32:09Well, you shouldn't.
32:10I'll tell you what, Chubby.
32:11Yeah.
32:12If you're talking real money.
32:14I am.
32:14Cash.
32:14That's right.
32:15He is.
32:15Oh, listen.
32:16All right.
32:16Listen.
32:17Listen, he's got cash.
32:18I mean, he's got cash.
32:19He's got more than you can spend or I can spend.
32:21Even Flash can spend.
32:23So I do.
32:24Well.
32:24Well, he's right around here and he's fat.
32:26Roscoe.
32:27I didn't say tummy.
32:28No.
32:30Well, well, well.
32:32Well.
32:33So this ain't old belly.
32:36No.
32:36I don't know what you're talking about.
32:38What do you mean?
32:38He means the one.
32:39No, no, no, no, no, no.
32:42No.
32:48Jackpot.
32:54Roscoe, if we ever get out of this thing alive, I'll kill you.
32:59No, Laverne.
33:00I'm not kidding.
33:02Right now, you are talking to the law and order in Hazard County.
33:05So if you see any sign of those escaped convicts, you just tell them to come see me.
33:10Now, listen, Laverne.
33:11You don't have to worry.
33:12With me on the job, you're as safe as a penny in Boss Hog's pot.
33:18It's covered!
33:21Oh, hi, Randall.
33:23Just take it easy.
33:24Cletus.
33:26Practicing your fast draw.
33:28Yeah.
33:29Cletus, those escaped cons have disappeared off the face of the earth.
33:34Never mind about that.
33:35What about the escaped cons?
33:37You are standing on my gun.
33:43Now, I don't think Lehman and Hammer have ever heard of Brer Rabbit and the Briar Patch.
33:47Because the barn is where the dukes want to go.
33:50Keep your eyes and your mouth shut.
33:54I'm headed to the barn.
33:55Now if we can just get to them bows and arrows.
33:57I said keep your mouth shut.
33:58Come on over and lead it right down here, sugar.
34:01I can keep an eye on you.
34:04Better do what the man says.
34:06Yeah, we'll keep an eye on you too, Daisy.
34:09Come on.
34:10All of you.
34:14Say, wait a minute.
34:15I've been trying to tell you I am commissioner around here.
34:18County commissioner there it is.
34:20And I for one deserve a little more respect.
34:22Down, Fatsul.
34:23Keep your eyes and your mouth shut.
34:25When you said Fatsul, he meant you.
34:27Oh, just shut up and give me some of your blankets, will you?
34:30Because this ain't going to be enough to keep me warm.
34:32And get that meanzy fleabag away from me, will you?
34:34Knock it off, D2.
34:36Sir, you don't mind if Fatsul says her prayers, do you?
34:39Close your eyes.
34:40Close your eyes like a nice man's head.
34:57Roscoe, don't get so close.
35:15Well, I thought somebody had tried to escape, but they didn't.
35:19I reckon that they figured anybody left behind would have a tough time with those fellas
35:23who were getting a little bit testy.
35:30Say, you all right if we open our eyes yet?
35:33Okay.
35:33No moving around.
35:35Man, am I hungry.
35:36Yeah, I know what you mean.
35:37How about the rest of y'all?
35:38Yeah?
35:39Stuff.
35:39I sure couldn't use a good old hot country breakfast.
35:42Hey, what about with my homemade sizzling juicy sausages?
35:44Some of them biscuits?
35:45Yeah.
35:46And we got fresh milk and eggs.
35:49Shoot, it won't take us a minute to gather them together.
35:51Hey, how about it, Hammer?
35:52I bet after all that prison food, you could enjoy a good home-cooked meal.
35:55Okay.
35:56But, Unc, you and Sugar go.
35:57You two stay here.
35:59I can watch you.
36:00I'm trying anything funny.
36:02I'll start shooting.
36:03You ain't trying nothing.
36:05Yes, sir.
36:06Say, listen.
36:07Now that I've had a chance to sleep on it, I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse.
36:13You know, old boss is the only person I know who could sleep in a barn and not get a
36:17spot on it quite sick.
36:19The best in the world.
36:20And I'll give you one of Flash's puppies.
36:22Are you kidding me, mister?
36:23All right, look.
36:24Make it two dozen cases of shine.
36:25I'll give you the whole letter and ten pounds of dog bones.
36:28Forget it, pal.
36:29Well, I'll give you the whole still.
36:30Listen, I'll let you pick Flash's husband.
36:32If you don't mind, do you, darling?
36:33Shut your yuck.
36:34All right, all right.
36:43Wait till they serve the next course.
37:01Get that gun.
37:02Get my gun.
37:03Daisy.
37:10Get me out of here.
37:11Get me out of here.
37:13Get me out of here.
37:15Okay.
37:15Hey, come on, get me out of here.
37:16Get me out of here.
37:18Get me out of here.
37:18Get me out of here.
37:18Okay.
37:19You dudes.
37:20Come out of there with your hands up or we come in firing.
37:24That's firing up.
37:25I'm warning you.
37:26Got a gun.
37:29Dang dudes are trying to kill us.
37:30Get down.
37:31Get down.
37:31I'm going to fire a couple of shots over their heads.
37:43Let's get him while he's reloading.
37:49All right.
37:53We're just supposed to be scaring him.
37:55Those are pretty close.
37:56You think you can pin down, Uncle Jesse?
38:00I'm going to faint.
38:01I need food.
38:03You're that scared, huh?
38:04And that hungry.
38:05Oh, yeah.
38:09Watch your book out.
38:18There's a goat.
38:19You're going to eat the goat?
38:20I'm going to milk it.
38:21Oh, yeah.
38:22Keep there.
38:29And while there was a fight in the battle of the O.K. Corral, Duke's time.
38:33Back in town, things was beginning to pick up, considered it was so early.
38:37Mabel, this is Cletus.
38:39The governor calls.
38:41Take a message.
38:41Cletus.
38:42Cletus, look here on this napkin.
38:43Say, help.
38:44Daisy must have put it on there when I was out at the Duke place.
38:46Think you're in trouble.
38:48Say what?
38:49Look, never mind.
38:50I'll tell you on the way.
38:50All right?
38:51Come on.
38:53Come on.
38:54Come on.
38:54Just don't sit there and give me a hand, will you?
38:57I'm having trouble.
38:58I ain't getting enough.
38:59You sure you got the right for you?
39:00You mean this one?
39:06I'm going to see if I can make it over to Dixie.
39:15Give me your last arrow.
39:17Cover me.
39:18You bet.
39:19It's too dangerous.
39:20Don't buy it.
39:27Get back here.
39:29Oh, come on.
39:35Hey, boy.
39:35Look what Flash fell.
39:37She found an egg.
39:38Oh, that's good.
39:39I can just use that in my milkshake.
39:42You mean our milkshake.
39:43No, I mean my milkshake.
39:45Here goes.
39:46Boys.
39:49Boys.
39:52It's probably you left the shells on there.
39:58That prison guard left behind his carrion.
40:01Tear gas.
40:02Nice going, Hammer.
40:03How's your arm?
40:04Not so bad.
40:05All right.
40:07I'll copy.
40:10That'll rip.
40:15Tear gas.
40:17Paisy, no.
40:23Nice pitch in there.
40:24All right.
40:27Now, don't get anxious.
40:28They still got your guns.
40:30Just a little bit.
40:37The sheriff's cop.
40:41Here's the keys.
40:42Get the tires.
40:53Take it off.
40:55Look, they've blown our tires.
41:02Tear, take it off, Tear.
41:03Take off my money, baby.
41:04And my mortgage money.
41:05Let's go, Bo.
41:06It's enough time.
41:07Let's get it.
41:07We need to go.
41:08Oh, we need to go.
41:09Come on.
41:10You got the keys, don't you?
41:11Come on.
41:12Come on.
41:13Come on.
41:13Come on.
41:14That's it.
41:16Watch yourself.
41:23Don't give up, friends.
41:25Their best time is 53 seconds.
41:28Now, y'all watch real close.
41:30This here's the bad guys in Roscoe's car.
41:33But you can forget that.
41:35And here comes Cletus and Cooter.
41:37Remember that.
41:41And coming in on the right is the prison door.
41:46Hey, here's Roscoe.
41:48Come on.
41:48Turn around, please.
41:49It's empty content.
41:50True.
41:50There's two people in that car?
41:51Yeah.
41:52I thought it flashed a little over, Chris.
41:53Hang on.
42:05Go get the bows and the dynamite here.
42:07See ya.
42:08See ya.
42:09Come on.
42:10Come on.
42:11Come on.
42:12Come on.
42:12Get after him.
42:12Get after him.
42:13Get after him, man.
42:14Get.
42:14Come on.
42:15Come on.
42:16Faster now.
42:19Time, minute three.
42:21Needs work, boys.
42:23Listen here.
42:23Listen.
42:24Don't forget to bring back my money bill.
42:25I'm the sheriff.
42:30I ought to be in that vehicle.
42:32Digit in hot pursuit.
42:36We ain't never gonna catch him unless we go cross country.
42:39We got no choice then.
42:48We got no choice.
42:50Woo!
42:55Woo!
42:55We've been in the Marines.
42:57Looks like the general's gonna have to join the airport, huh?
42:59All right.
43:05All right.
43:08Woo!
43:09Woo!
43:14Woo!
43:15Woo!
43:16Woo!
43:16Woo!
43:28Pow boys.
43:30Well, looky who we caught up.
43:33Makes them tired and fast.
43:34I don't know.
43:35I expect you better start putting some polis in them.
43:40The boys ain't kidding around.
43:41Yeah, all right.
43:42Let's see how they like the animated.
43:43Good luck.
44:01Hey, dang it!
44:04Well, they didn't.
44:05I guess not.
44:06Holy smoke.
44:11You better hit him this time, Luke.
44:12Yeah, that right.
44:17Get him now.
44:26Yeah! All right!
44:28Yeah, Luke!
44:39Come on, get out of there now.
44:41Get him out of there.
44:44Go back up and...
44:45Come on.
44:45All right.
44:46All right, watch yourself.
44:47Right against your car now.
44:48Go back, Clark.
44:55Hey, come on down. Give us a hand.
44:57And so the escaped convicts were finally captured by the Duke boys
45:01and turned over to the law
45:03after they'd been relieved of Jesse's mortgage money
45:05and the boss's very fat money belt.
45:09But the Duke's problem wasn't over,
45:11because they had to get boss to accept that mortgage money.
45:14We got it!
45:15We got it!
45:15There it is!
45:16Oh, they got it!
45:17They got everything!
45:18Here's our mortgage money.
45:20You gotta take that.
45:21Boss, you gotta play fair.
45:22I am playing fair and square,
45:24and that's why I got this...
45:25So they counted on old boss's greed.
45:27Come on, now.
45:28They slipped the mortgage money into the money belt,
45:30which meant that boss had accepted the payment,
45:33and the Dukes kept the farm.
45:40Now, you do realize that this all started,
45:42because they got their first traffic light in Hazard County,
45:45don't you?
46:04Well, you do.
46:15You do.
46:17My analogue, your video.
46:21Too OPA not to be in the middle.
46:22You do.
46:26No.
46:27You do.
46:28You do.
46:29You do.
46:29You do.
46:30You do.