- 2 days ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:01On the Duke
00:02Because of your dang strike, I'm the temporary sheriff of Hazard County
00:06It's Duke After Duke, when boss tricks Jesse into being sheriff
00:10Yeah, I'm in the hot first minute
00:13The temple's TV shop just got cleaned out
00:21Will do, boss
00:34Just a good old boy
00:37Never meaning no harm
00:42Beats all you never saw
00:43Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born
00:48Straightening the curves
00:52Flatening the hills
00:56Someday the mountain might get them, but the law never will
01:01Making their way
01:04The only way they know how
01:08That's just a little bit more than the law will allow
01:13Just a good old boy
01:17Wouldn't change if they could
01:21Fighting the system like a true modern-day Robin Hood
01:31Y'all might have noticed, the general ain't exactly getting it on here.
01:36Now, Bo and Luke never did like to go full blast unless there's a real good reason.
01:40Especially when they got Uncle Jesse and Daisy in the car with them.
01:43Can you boys think of anything else?
01:46Not much as I hate to say it, Daisy. I think we could probably all use a day off from
01:49your fancy cooking.
01:50One of the last notch of my belt is this from them praline pies you made this week.
01:54Listen, I got some belts I've grown out of, and they'd have a lot of notches left on them for
01:58you.
01:59I didn't mean to get first.
02:00That's all right, Coach. You're the deputy and I'm the sheriff.
02:02Now, what Roscoe and Cletus are reading in that newspaper has done got them green with envy
02:06And hotter than a West Texas highway on the 1st of August.
02:10Will you look at that sucker's made twice what you and I make.
02:13I know, and that's not counting that special withholding tax boss takes out our checks.
02:17Yeah, which he withholds from the government in the 1st place.
02:19Which makes it unnecessary for him to withhold it from us.
02:21Because he's withholding for his own fat little pocketbook.
02:24Withholding and withholding and withholding.
02:25You know something, Cletus.
02:28Now, I know your boss hogs blood cushion, but I don't care.
02:32And you know something, Sheriff? I know your boss's unblooded brother-in-law, but I don't care either.
02:36You don't? No, I don't.
02:37You bet. You know something. You're all union.
02:40You are, too. Let's go break it to boss.
02:41Let's go. Come on, man.
02:43You need your support.
02:45Look for the union lifeboat.
02:47You can give him a little chunk.
02:48Here, we got the evidence right here.
02:50Oh, oh, oh.
02:51Don't go scuffing my feet.
02:52Get over there.
02:52There's your feet.
02:54Oh, I love it.
02:55Go ahead.
03:03I'm going, Cletus.
03:05Now, Cletus, this is your superior officer.
03:09It's those dang Duke boys.
03:10You know something.
03:12When we want them, we can't find them.
03:13And then, when we don't want them, we're in the way.
03:16I know what you mean.
03:17Hey, y'all got any idea what we've done that deserves the pleasure of their company?
03:21Nothing.
03:22Well, all in favor of losing them, say yeah.
03:24Yeah!
03:25Yay!
03:26Yahoo!
03:27Well, he has a knee-high's habit.
03:29Hang on, y'all.
03:32You know, habits are hard to break.
03:35The Dukes are running from the law that ain't even after them.
03:39Do it?
03:40No.
03:41Uh, it's...
03:47Uh, Cletus, this is Roscoe again.
03:50Uh, listen, there ain't no way we're gonna get around them, so, uh, let's cut through town on Meadowbrook Road.
03:55Is that a Roger?
03:56Uh, that's Roger.
03:57I'm right behind you, General.
03:58Leave it away.
04:08They turned down Meadowbrook Road.
04:10Well, that sure ain't like them to give up the chase.
04:13I know it.
04:14Well, unless they wasn't chasing you in the first place.
04:17Yeah, that's a thought.
04:20I wonder what the heck is up to.
04:22Well, it was showdown at the J.D. Corral for Roscoe and Cletus, as they showed Boss the article about
04:28the lawmen in Chickasha winning their strike.
04:30Just forget all about this here breezes and benefit talk and all that kind of clip trip, because I just
04:37can't afford it.
04:38No, times is really bad.
04:40Well?
04:40You heard?
04:41We got a recession.
04:42Well, well, we...
04:44Well, I'll tell you what I'll do, though.
04:45You get back on the job.
04:47Yeah.
04:48And I'll think about it.
04:49Maybe I can't afford a little bit of what you want in a year or two.
04:54Are you kidding me, boss?
04:57Listen, we know you can afford it, and we're not going to wait a year.
05:01Or two.
05:01Or two.
05:02You ain't?
05:03No.
05:03Well, here I thought I was being generous.
05:05No.
05:05All right, just get back to work, will you?
05:07Before I dock your paycheck for all the time you spent joining here in my office.
05:11Oh, listen, don't you threaten us.
05:12No.
05:13You're forcing us to go out on strike.
05:16Go out on strike?
05:16Go out on strike?
05:17Strike.
05:17Is that what you said?
05:18He said that.
05:19Well, how dare you?
05:20Well, did you just...
05:21All right, all right.
05:22Just go out on strike.
05:23Yeah, yeah, yeah.
05:23But while you're striking out there, don't forget that you're both also fired.
05:28Woken in, fired.
05:29Never fired?
05:30Yeah, you're fired till you come to your senses.
05:32Ooh.
05:33So just hand in your badges and your guns and your gun belts as men.
05:36Yeah, go over here.
05:37Put them down right there.
05:38Put them down right there.
05:39Put that right down there.
05:39Yeah, if you want to strike them right there.
05:41Put them down right there.
05:42Hush.
05:42Just put them down there.
05:44Oh.
05:44Right there.
05:45That's what I like about you.
05:46You're all union.
05:47I'm all scared.
05:50Policemen have bills to pay just like an apparel.
05:52All right, we've got this done.
05:54I've got some more business over to the bank so that we can go home.
05:56Policemen can't work on an empty stomach.
05:58I don't know where they look at that.
06:02I did it.
06:03If there's any money left, give it to me.
06:05Pass us by.
06:07More dollars, more collars.
06:09Oh, yeah.
06:10Just pass them by.
06:12No loot, no pursuit.
06:13Support your local police dog.
06:15More meat and less bones.
06:17I didn't believe in this.
06:19Roscoe has played us on strike against, boss, huh?
06:22You got it.
06:23My goodness.
06:24They finally want a bigger piece of the pie, huh?
06:26Yeah, either that or their own private speed track.
06:29Yeah, well, with inflationary,
06:30it's going to need at least two speed tracks.
06:33Now, just a minute.
06:35Roscoe and Cletus may not be as pure as the driven snow,
06:39but they're the only law we've got,
06:41and some law on hazard is better than none at all,
06:43so let's just get on over to the bank
06:45and take care of our business.
06:47See y'all later.
06:48It'll be done in a little while.
06:49You got it.
06:51Now, everybody knows that old boss runs hazard,
06:54and most of the crime in it.
06:56So, not having Roscoe to help,
06:58boss took off to find the Jones clan,
07:00to kind of take up the crime slack.
07:03I tell you, being an entrepreneur
07:05is a heavy responsibility.
07:07Learning that word wasn't too easy, either.
07:17Well, well, well, the Jones boys.
07:19Boss found the Jones at their favorite watering hole.
07:22That's Simon and Floy.
07:24Hi, boss.
07:25Say, listen, where's that special sister of yours?
07:28And that's her sister, Alabama.
07:31Her friends always beware of folks that have a first name like a state.
07:35They're always trouble.
07:37Alabama.
07:38Honey, you sure are a sight for sore eyes.
07:41Lot of water under the bridge since some old colonial city days, ain't there?
07:45Hmm.
07:46A little bird told me that you Joneses might be passing through these parts
07:49and might just be camping out here.
07:51Let's just say we're between jobs.
07:53Listen.
07:54What would you say if I told you that every low man and hazard just went out on strike?
07:58Go on.
07:59Well, the town is perched high and dry.
08:03I'd say this town was just ripe for picking.
08:07That's what I'd say, too.
08:11Same deal as the last deal, 50-50?
08:14Yes, same deal, of course, 50-50.
08:17It don't bother you to be robbing people from your own town?
08:20Well, it would, but I ain't.
08:22I sold all them folks robbery insurance.
08:25So the only ones are gonna take it on the chin of the insurance company.
08:30Well, now, boss, all we got is that small pickup.
08:32Well, make two trips.
08:34Nobody's gonna stop you.
08:38And even if somebody did try to catch you,
08:40it wouldn't be you they were trying to catch.
08:42No siree, boss.
08:44It'd be the Duke boys.
08:46The Duke boys?
08:47The Duke boys.
08:48Who are the Duke boys?
08:50Oh, you'll find out soon enough, honey.
08:52It'll be a surprise.
08:53You like surprises?
08:54I do.
08:55I keep in touch.
08:57I'm happy.
09:00Floyd, you get some of the truck.
09:02Simon, you get the guns.
09:05Now, how do you reckon old boss figures to get the Dukes messed up in this?
09:10Well...
09:11Policemen have bills to pay just like anyone else.
09:14Just like anyone else?
09:15Policemen can't work on an empty stomach.
09:17Can't get hungry like any human being.
09:19All we want is what we got coming.
09:23You're gonna get what you deserve.
09:25Oh.
09:26Oh, here, here, here.
09:27Here.
09:28Amen, brought it.
09:28All right.
09:29It's gonna be a glory day, fellas.
09:31You Dukes just hush and butt out of our picketing anyway.
09:34Kids, that's enough.
09:36No.
09:37How's it going?
09:38Well, Jesse, it's come see, come saw.
09:41Speaking of saw, look over there.
09:43There's a little fat meadow muffin.
09:45When he sees his sign, he's gonna get...
09:47Wait a minute.
09:48Wait a minute over there.
09:50Thank you, Bob.
09:50We got a picket line here.
09:51Well, what do you think you're doing over here, huh?
09:54Look here.
09:55I don't want no picket in our county property.
09:57Well, yeah.
09:57And get them parches off your clothes on the corner of your fight.
10:00These are our...
10:00Just move on before I call out some...
10:03Oh, wait a minute.
10:05And you get that vicious dog of yours off the picket line too, you hear me?
10:08Hey, wait a minute.
10:09All right.
10:10Hey, listen, boss.
10:12Does this mean that you want to talk turkey?
10:15Wrong.
10:15It means I want to go inside and eat one.
10:18Oh, wait.
10:18Now just move it, will you, please?
10:20D.D., now it ain't right not to have law enforcement and hazards.
10:24So why don't you just take Roscoe and Cletus and sit down at a bargaining table?
10:28You're right.
10:29That would be fair.
10:30I will sit down at a bargaining table with them.
10:33First thing tomorrow morning.
10:35Do it tomorrow.
10:35Tomorrow morning.
10:36Well, what about today?
10:37We can't go without no law enforcement all day.
10:39Today, today, today.
10:40What could possibly happen today?
10:43Help!
10:44Help!
10:44I've been robbed!
10:45Sheriff, please stop them.
10:47They took everything.
10:48What?
10:49Stop them.
10:49They took everything.
10:50Everything.
10:50Who?
10:51Who took what?
10:51Where?
10:51They stole every stereo and video game in my store.
10:54I seen them.
10:55They just drove up.
10:56Look.
10:56Look.
10:57There's their pickups on a maple street.
10:59Do something.
11:00There's nothing in the world that I would rather do than to help you.
11:03But I can't.
11:04My hands are tied.
11:05You see, we're on strike.
11:07There you strike.
11:08How am I going to get back my stereo and video game?
11:10I'll tell you how.
11:12Everybody, like you heard, there's been a robbery and the crooks just went up Maple Street.
11:16Now, anybody, or somebody, just get after them and make a citizen's arrest.
11:21Hey, boys.
11:22Boys, please, and I'll go if you'll give in on the strike.
11:26What?
11:26Never.
11:27Listen, hear up to me, folks.
11:29Ain't there just somebody around here with a fast car who's man enough to go after and catch them troops?
11:37All right, everybody, sit tight.
11:39Yeah, look at me.
11:39You'll see what we can do.
11:40Oh, no, no, no.
11:41Not you.
11:42Not you, boys.
11:43No, I want somebody we can trust.
11:45Well, you're out.
11:45Come back.
11:46Come back here.
11:47I'm tired of this.
11:51Hey!
11:54Hey!
11:55Hey!
11:56Hey!
11:57You forgot your groceries, too!
12:00Come back!
12:02Come on back!
12:03Come on back here!
12:05Come on back!
12:08Uh-huh.
12:09The boss has done it again.
12:19Well, ain't we sitting, pretty boys.
12:47Oh, gosh.
12:48Hold on.
12:49Got it.
12:51Woo!
12:58Yeah!
13:23Oh, listen, if you mean that you're being pursued at this exact moment by a certain orange clunker car, don't
13:32you worry, none, because that's exactly what I had in mind for them two boys to be doing.
13:37What do you want me to do with them?
13:38Well, now, I don't care how you do this, but what I want you to do is...
13:44I'm kind of looking forward to somebody starting to think ahead of old boss, ain't you?
13:51I don't see much of a plan, but if I was old Bo and Luke, I'd begin to get suspicious
13:55when I couldn't catch that old clunker truck.
14:05This is about as good a place as any. Hold on.
14:09I'm holding.
14:21All right, fellas, out of the car. Fight!
14:24Have y'all ever noticed that Bo and Luke most always get into trouble when they stop?
14:38All right.
14:39We'll get out fast.
14:53They were easier than I thought.
14:56Let's get out of here.
14:57Come on.
14:58Time out.
14:59You Duke boys fight just about as good as you drive.
15:03Too bad your friends don't.
15:05How'd you know who we were?
15:07Just a wild guess.
15:09Get some rope.
15:13Meanwhile, Cooter dropped Jesse and Daisy off at the Duke farm.
15:17Jesse kept trying to reach Bo and Luke on the CB all the way in from town with no luck.
15:21This is Shepard calling the lost sheep.
15:23This is Shepard calling the lost sheep.
15:25Come back, boys.
15:26You out there?
15:27Yeah, they're out there all right, but they're just too tied up to answer.
15:31More ideas?
15:33Quiet.
15:34Don't forget, I got the gun.
15:38Any word?
15:40Can't raise them any word, dang it.
15:41Well, then they gotta be in trouble or they would have answered you, Uncle Jesse.
15:44I know.
15:45That's what I've been thinking.
15:46But I've been afraid to think it.
15:49Well, let's go.
15:50Where are we going?
15:50Get Roscoe and Cletus to give us a hand finding the boys.
15:53And their own strike.
15:54Well, they're just gonna have to unstrike their strike.
15:57I need their help and I need it bad.
16:00Now, they can walk up and down there all they want with them placards and scare J.D. Hawks,
16:04but they don't scare me none.
16:06Hey, taxes, they can just come and give me a hand and I'll go find the boys.
16:13What's that nice, Santa Bama, honey?
16:16You're really doing your job, just like I said.
16:19Now, you take very good care of them Duke boys, you hear me?
16:23Oh, don't worry, boss.
16:25I got them all tied up out at your warehouse.
16:27What do we do with them now?
16:29Well, now, Alabama, is when we start to lay the whole blame for them robberies.
16:34Right smack in the lamp of them Duke boys.
16:37Eww!
16:38While old boss was laying out his frame up to Alabama,
16:41things was deteriorating on the labor barricade.
16:45Cletus, will you don't scuff my sign?
16:48Just across the street, old Jake Sumner was taking a pretty expensive lunch break.
16:53Because inside, those Jones boys was a cleaning out his shelves.
16:56And y'all know who's gonna get the blame, don't you?
17:01Excuse me, ma'am.
17:02Is there any chance of getting a drink of water?
17:04Ma'am, well, ain't we the polite one?
17:07Well, you see, that comes from being brought up right.
17:09Which, of course, you wouldn't know nothing about.
17:12You apologize for that.
17:13No way, ma'am.
17:15Oh, apologize to the lady.
17:16Maybe we can get some water to drink.
17:18I will not apologize to the lady.
17:19Bo!
17:21I'm sorry, ma'am.
17:24That's better.
17:26Now, don't you two run away.
17:31You didn't overplay it much, did you?
17:33That hurt, didn't it?
17:34I got my compass.
17:37All right.
17:39See if they lift up out of this.
17:43Whoa!
18:09She's gone.
18:10I don't see her.
18:11Let's go.
18:12Come on.
18:18Still thirsty?
18:22You got the stuff.
18:25Trouble?
18:25Do I ever have trouble?
18:28All right, inside.
18:29Come on, move it.
18:30Now, friends, ain't nothing scarier than a woman on the other end of a waving gun.
18:34You know, I'll bet she can't cook, either.
18:37Ho, ho, ho!
18:38Just a little more dough.
18:40Now, here comes boss, toting a snack.
18:43Oh, listen, boss.
18:45Phoenix and I, we've been talking it over, and we've decided we will take one week a year with pay.
18:50One week?
18:51Right.
18:51Never.
18:52Oh, boss, how about a long weekend with pay?
18:54Weekend?
18:55Forget it.
18:56Oh, one afternoon with pay.
18:58One afternoon?
18:59Not on your life.
19:03Rasko, please.
19:06Oh, hold it in the back, buddy.
19:10Oh, hold it in the back, Lopin'.
19:12Oh, get away.
19:14Oh, get away.
19:15Get away.
19:15Get away from me.
19:16Will you?
19:17Rasko, you knuckleheads.
19:20What?
19:20You love nuts.
19:21You see what your dumb strike comes to?
19:23Violence.
19:24Violence.
19:25Just down there.
19:26Why not?
19:27Well, I tell them a grocery.
19:28Get me out of here.
19:31I ain't giving you one minute off, you hear me?
19:35I ain't giving you one minute off, you hear me?
19:36I got your tomato.
19:41Jesse Duke, it's your Duke's fault.
19:43Wait a minute.
19:44You know, you shut our strike back for weeks, maybe even years.
19:47It's your own fault, fella.
19:48Never mind about that.
19:49Now, boys, I need your help.
19:51Bo and Luke could be in bad trouble.
19:53Jake Sumner's camera store at Andy Tibble's TV shop just got cleaned out.
19:57No!
19:58That was terrible.
19:59My TV's something there being repaired.
20:01Well, I ain't there no more.
20:02Oh, Roscoe, maybe this one.
20:04Can we go after him?
20:04Forget it, please, forget it, forget it, forget it.
20:06You're not a deputy anymore, right?
20:08And I'm not a sheriff anymore.
20:10I know.
20:10We've been fired, so get back on the picket line.
20:14Just get on.
20:15Ho, ho, ho.
20:17Ladies, start with the hee, hee, hee.
20:19Those onions.
20:23Meanwhile, old boss was a-whoopin' up an appetizer.
20:25Real good.
20:27You get an A.
20:29Yeah, A for L or B.
20:31All right, now, honey.
20:32I want you to take all that stuff that you just got your hands on and get it all over
20:37to our usual place in Chalk Dog County.
20:39Will do.
20:40The next thing you gotta do, and listen carefully, is get your hands on one of them cameras you
20:45just gotta hold off and take yourself a real nice picture of them Duke boys for the sheriff.
20:51Sheriff?
20:52I thought you said the sheriff was on strike.
20:54I didn't mean the old sheriff.
20:55No, I meant the new sheriff, the one whose first job is gonna be to arrest them Duke boys.
21:01And that new sheriff is gonna be somebody who nobody ever would think of would arrest them.
21:06I don't know or care who or what you're raving about, but if we keep the heat off me and
21:10my brothers, I'll do just like you say.
21:13Yeah, you do that.
21:17All right.
21:19Now, I believe I'd shoot that thing to be sure it was dead first.
21:29All right.
21:34And you boys move them TVs into the back of that RV and get back inside for the rest.
21:38Watch this.
21:41Play change, boys.
21:42What?
21:45Oh, the sheriff's gonna just love that one.
21:48I think we're being set up.
21:50What was your first clue?
21:51Now, how about one more just in case you blinked your eyes the first time?
21:55Sure.
21:56Go, go.
21:57Go, go.
21:59Go!
22:09Go, go, go, go.
22:18Go, go.
22:38that's enough alabama let them go up on around this next bend you know it looks like bo and
22:43loot's being had again i'll bet alabama's got some plans for them pictures she took too
22:50and now what well we better get back to the edge of town
22:53i gotta get these pictures to boss hog after that the duke boys are his problem
23:08you lose them yeah i think so it seemed awful easy to me
23:18first a car then a truck about all that's left is something to fall out of the sky
23:29hang on all right
23:34way to catch a ride sorry ain't going our way though let's get out of here all right
23:40hey roy did you put that vehicle in there
23:46you know even the moving business is kind of strange and hazard
23:51well the boys headed for the duke farm still not realizing that they had some of that stolen stuff
23:56in the trunk of the general which was all part of old boss's plan
24:00uh jesse daisy you got your ears on come back
24:05listen this is lost sheep to shepherd and bo peep you got your ears on
24:12hey they ain't at the farm
24:14try cooter
24:17crazy cooter this is lost sheep you got your ears on come back
24:22cooter
24:24where is everybody where everybody is is at the emergency town meeting over at boss hog's office
24:32wait a minute wait a minute we didn't call this in meeting to talk about no strike
24:38on the other hand uh since you did bring up the strike
24:42uh maybe until it's settled uh we could just appoint ourselves a temporary sheriff
24:49well that's what we've been wanting all the time
24:52of course uh trouble is here at the last minute
24:56uh where are we gonna find someone for the job whom we can trust and their faith in
25:01i mean where oh where in this very room
25:04can we find somebody that we can all look up to
25:07and who would be willing to make the sacrifice of taking on the job of temporary sheriff
25:12where i repeat where in this room is there a man i can reach out and touch whom we can
25:20all trust
25:21where where boss you've done it i did
25:24there's only one person in this room like that that's jesse duke
25:29oh no no no no no no no right not jesse duke
25:34no way no he wouldn't do it sure he would sure i don't want to be
25:38well all right all right if you insist let's put it to a vote
25:42and all those who want jesse duke raise your hands
25:44well it's unanimous congratulations jesse the people have spoken
25:51you are our temporary sheriff
25:56oh i've been thinking what
25:59who pictures that little lady took about to fall in the boss's hands ain't they
26:02yeah the only reason roscoe and cletus ain't after us right now is because they're on strike
26:06i wonder what boss has got going
26:08something the real shame of the situation is the predicament he puts a town folk in
26:13no protection at all
26:14i know it
26:15hey wait a minute we could help
26:17how well when uncle jesse gets back we have him call some of his old cronies
26:21and we call some of our buddies we put together some sort of volunteer bunch
26:24like the well like the hazard fire brigade
26:26hey that way when the joneses come to town we'll have some kind of surprise waiting for them
26:30huh you got that right
26:32to enforce all the laws
26:33to enforce all the laws
26:35of hazard county so help me
26:36of hazard county so help me
26:38well all right then
26:39now here's your vids
26:41and now your temporary sheriff
26:46you're proud of you
26:48and boys we're going to be even prouder of sheriff duke here
26:52when he gets out
26:53captures and brings in the perpetrators responsible for robbing your stores
26:57well jd that's going to take some time
27:00namely
27:00bow and luke duke
27:02what that's a lie
27:05no
27:05jd
27:08you've gone local
27:09you know them boys didn't have nothing to do with them store of robberies
27:13oh no
27:14well there's proof that they did
27:16i got some pictures of them caught in the air
27:19hey boys
27:21take a gander at these
27:22let me see
27:24where'd you get them
27:25uncle jesse
27:26let me see this
27:27boys
27:28kind of favors them don't it
27:30all right
27:32all right
27:34i'll do my sworn duty
27:36and i'll bring them boys in
27:38just to prove in a court of law
27:40that them phony pictures
27:42don't tell the whole truth
27:44come on d
27:47you can take
27:48cletus's patrol car
27:49parked outside
27:50it's all yours now
27:52sheriff duke
27:54old boss kind of looks like a cat
27:56with cream on his whiskers
27:58huh
27:58ho ho ho
28:03well where are you gonna go first
28:04with jesse
28:05i'm going out to the farm first thing
28:06because if the boys are in trouble
28:07that's where they'll come to
28:08and i want to be there when they get there
28:10then i'm going with you
28:11it's time for us dukes to be together
28:12well sir are you going out there
28:14as your uncle jesse or as the sheriff
28:16cooter you know better than that
28:18i don't like this any better than you do
28:21sorry
28:22this ain't easy on them cooter
28:23or any of us for that matter
28:28oh wait a minute jesse
28:29what are you and daisy doing
28:31you're taking cletus's vehicle
28:32you see that there badge
28:34yeah
28:35well because of your dang strike
28:37i'm the temporary sheriff of hazard county
28:39and i ain't got time to explain
28:41what do you mean
28:41you're taking my car
28:43wait a minute
28:44so sheriff jesse duke and daisy
28:47headed back to the duke farm
28:48hoping to find bo and luke
28:50jesse duke
28:50the new sheriff
28:52that's impossible
28:53no it's possible
28:54boss wore him in and it's legal
28:56what
28:57the boss did that to me
28:58that little sneaky metal muffin
29:00you just
29:00all right
29:02cleaners
29:03pick it live
29:21here's lucas coming back at you
29:23you ain't by chance seen uncle jesse or daisy have you
29:25yeah y'all i just seen him
29:28listen you got something to hang tight on five by five
29:30because i got some good news and some bad news
29:33well let her rip
29:34hey now the good news is that your uncle jesse is the new
29:37contemporary sheriff of hazard county
29:41what
29:42but the uh
29:43bad news is it looks like he's coming out to
29:45arrest y'all
29:46cooter told the boys how boss conned jesse into becoming sheriff
29:50and all about them incriminating photographs
29:52cooter now wait a minute you trying to tell us that our uncle jesse's coming out to the farm to
29:56arrest us
29:57listen y'all i i don't know for sure if he's gonna do that
30:00all i know is that there's a
30:02sad old man with a badge
30:04heading towards you
30:05i'm gone
30:07yeah we're gone too
30:11nah
30:11no uncle jesse wouldn't arrest us
30:13i knew them pictures would show up
30:16well he ain't no rascal or cletus
30:18so if we tell him how that happened
30:20he's gonna believe us
30:22yeah
30:22won't he
30:23yeah
30:24yeah shoot
30:25nothing to worry about
30:26sheriff
30:27oh hey we got air in the spare
30:28yeah we didn't the last time
30:30i better check
30:31good idea
30:32sheriff jesse duke
30:33speak of the devil
30:34here he comes now
30:36i never thought i'd live to see the day he's driving one of them things
30:45look i don't know quite how to tell you this
30:50want to watch tv
30:52lord
30:53this kind of evidence jesse's got to take us in
30:55that's what boss hog wanted in the first place
30:57yeah
30:57save him the embarrassment
30:58take this stuff back to the rightful owners and then somehow get him out to that warehouse
31:01where the rest of it's at
31:02all right
31:02let's go
31:09hang on girl
31:10oh i never thought i'd see the day when i said we'd chase the dick
31:15hot dang y'all
31:16old sheriff jesse is in hot pursuit of bow and loop
31:19you know i'll bet they never figured out over breakfast this morning
31:21yeah shepherd the law chief shepherd
31:24dang it this is a sheriff this is your uncle jesse in here
31:28uh pull over boys
31:29i can explain everything
31:31no you don't have to explain nothing uncle jesse
31:33you could have told us all about you being sheriff
31:35oh that's good
31:36pull over so we can talk
31:39listen uncle jesse we ain't never disobeyed an order from you before but
31:43i'm afraid this one time we got to do just that
31:45wait a minute
31:45are you boys trying to tell me that you're guilty
31:49no sir but
31:51well circumstances kind of point in that direction right about now
31:54well dang it pull over so we can talk about it
31:58we can't do that
32:00at least why should we get them circumstances pointing the other direction
32:03we're gone
32:14we're gone
32:17we're gone
32:30we're gone
32:32we're gone
32:34we're gone
32:34we're gone
32:34we're gone
32:34we're gone
32:35I don't know about y'all, but I don't know who to root for.
32:43Hey!
32:50Whoa!
32:56Hey!
32:59Are you all right?
33:00Oh, would you look at that.
33:02Looks like they're okay.
33:04Thank God.
33:06Listen, Uncle Jesse.
33:08Now, look, now, you and Daisy just set tight.
33:11Me and Bo are gonna go do what we gotta do,
33:12and we'll come back and fix that tire and explain everything then.
33:16Let's get out of here.
33:17Now, just dumping that stolen stuff wasn't good enough.
33:21They had to see that everything got back in its right place.
33:24That's called pride.
33:25But Jesse was up to his ears in Duke pride.
33:28He wasn't about to wait for help.
33:30No, they'd have worn-out tires on this thing.
33:35The boys unloaded everything on Otis Plunkett's doorstep,
33:39knowing that old Otis was honest enough to see that Jake and Andy got back what was theirs.
33:47But, meanwhile, most of the remaining stolen goods was close to pulling out for Choctaw County.
33:52Come on, move it.
34:02Well, Uncle Jesse ought to be up around the next band.
34:04Yeah, that is, if he waited for us.
34:15Now, just get him to pull over and talk.
34:24I guess it's that they found us.
34:44Well, it's the handiest place I could find to carry it.
34:47Now, how's come you to run off from me like that?
34:50So the boys told Jesse and Daisy about Alabama Jones and her brothers,
34:54and how old Boss had tried to set them up with them phony photographs and planting the evidence in their
34:59car.
34:59Just hold it, hold it, hold it.
35:01Now, if I was to believe all that, which I do, it'd still have to be proved in the court
35:06of law.
35:07Uncle Jesse, look.
35:08Now, we know where the evidence is.
35:10It's in an old warehouse down on Dry Creek Road.
35:12Belongs to Boss.
35:13That is, provided them Joneses ain't got rid of it yet.
35:15They're not lying.
35:16Well, I know that, Daisy, but as temporary deputy sheriff, I'm supposed to take them in for questioning.
35:22Of course, if you was to bamboozle me like you do Roscoe and Cletus all the time and get away,
35:31well, then I guess I'd have to follow you wherever you went.
35:33And if it happened to be that warehouse, well, then that's where we'd be.
35:36But then you wouldn't do that to your old Uncle Jesse, now, would you?
35:40Us?
35:41No.
35:41Not to you.
35:42No way.
35:43I didn't think so.
35:45You know, Sheriff, it looks like you got yourself another flat.
35:47Where?
35:48Why don't you go check it out?
35:49Where?
35:50Where?
35:50Take a look.
35:51See ya.
36:06I think we'll be able to catch him.
36:21Bo and Luke started steering Sheriff Uncle Jesse Duke straight up Dry Creek Road to Boss's Warehouse.
36:30Where the Jones trio was just getting ready to leave.
36:37Alabama, we got company.
36:41Boss, you got your ears on?
36:43This is J.D. Hogg, Alabama, honey.
36:46How you doing, combat?
36:47Them two young uncles and the Sheriff are coming down on us.
36:49If this is a double cross...
36:51Look, all them dukes ain't supposed to be there.
36:53All right, all right, all right.
36:54Look, never mind.
36:55Just get out of there quick.
36:56I'll take care of it.
36:58Let's move now.
37:00Move it!
37:16There they go, Sheriff.
37:17I see them.
37:19What callin' me Sheriff?
37:20You're makin' me sick to my stomach.
37:22Let's get them.
37:26Break them on, break them on.
37:27This is J.D. Hogg, you see?
37:29Now listen, listen, now listen good.
37:32Are you forgettin' that you're the sheriff or what?
37:34Well, you oughtin' for us to bring in Bo and Luke Dukes.
37:37You get what I'm sayin'?
37:38J.D., I'm conductin' this investigation the way I see fit.
37:42This is the way I see fit to do it.
37:44I ain't one of your Tonys like Cletus and Roscoe, so just bug off.
37:49You hear?
37:50But, uh, J.D.
37:52I love it, I love it, I love it.
37:54Hee, hee, hee, I'm in a hot pursuit.
37:57Uh, J.D., Duke, how dare you!
38:01Oh, oh.
38:04Roscoe.
38:05Yeah, what are you doin' makin' fun of Roscoe?
38:08And, besides, I was a terrible imitation of Roscoe.
38:14Roscoe.
38:15Roscoe and please, let's hear it.
38:22the duke's got some heavy catching up to do no question about that
38:28the boss meanwhile decided to finagle roscoe and cletus to stop the dukes and bring them all in
38:35but they out finagled the finagler and that's fine finagling
38:38oh yes you do come on no sir you give in if you give in we'll do it all right
38:46all right i'll give
38:46you anything you want just take these things and get going oh a 25 percent pay raise 25 all right
38:53done done done and two weeks paid vacation and double time pay for sunday work sunday's all right
39:02stick your clammy hands off of me i'm again your supreme superior commander sorry listen you
39:07oh listen listen here what you ain't want nothing unless you go on and catch them dukes and bring
39:12them all back you hear me including ex-tippy baby sheriff jesse duke for disobeying the direct order
39:17now here take these things and get going you hear me just go where you go oh you children
39:23come on flash it's hot pursuit get flash in there
39:37right for making an honest man a shearer i mean you just can't trust nobody nowadays no more
40:08you see that car
40:16Oh, Peter, why didn't you put the windows up?
40:20One thing while you're paying all over.
40:23Peter, I'll get you.
40:37All right, we're going to take a little shortcut, Sheriff, you're right behind us.
40:40Of course I'm coming.
40:42Who do you think taught you how to take these tours?
40:44I'm right behind you.
40:46That's right.
41:03Where'd they come from?
41:10Now, two things old Roscoe knows about is dogs and shortcuts.
41:15Now, this is Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane calling ex-temporary Sheriff Jesse Duke.
41:21Now, listen, Jesse, the strike is over, and I'm ordering the boys to pull over, and I'm serious.
41:27Right before you've been with that car.
41:29It looks like you've been to an Easter egg counter party.
41:31Listen, I'm not kidding now.
41:34I'm repeating.
41:35Pull over, or I'm going to have to run you over here.
41:40Who's going to be driving who off the road?
41:42So watch this.
41:44Get your own.
42:04He's been trying to outdrive me for 40 years, and never has been able to do it.
42:16What a horrendous crash.
42:30Alabama, they're gaining on us.
42:34Well, I always say, if you can't lose them, shoot them.
42:42Well, they're getting real mad now.
42:52Listen, now, pull up and pretend that we're going to back off.
42:56What?
42:57Listen, they've got to slow down going up Devil's Ridge, don't they?
43:00Yeah, they do.
43:01Yes, they do.
43:09Let me out right after they disappear out of the next bin.
43:16Be careful now.
43:18Got it.
43:28We're doing it.
43:30I guess people around here scare real easy.
43:41Here they come again.
43:54They're on the roof.
44:16You still got a gun.
44:18Use it!
44:33You still got a gun.
44:59I ain't holdin' right there!
45:05Hormit!
45:08You!
45:09Come on over here.
45:10Well, Jesse's first act as sheriff was to arrest them Jones people for robbery.
45:18His second one was to resign from his law enforcement career.
45:21You sure did a good job, and thank you for everything you've done.
45:25Boss naturally dropped the robbery charges against old Bo and Lou.
45:28And just as naturally, he denied that he had anything to do with Alabama and their brothers,
45:33which they didn't like too much.
45:35Well, when they get out of jail, old boss better show or watch it.
45:38Whoever you are.
45:39Before the labor movement could tidy up and celebrate their victory,
45:43old boss had already figured out a way to get a kick back on their vacations.
45:47Well, the dukes headed back to the farm and supper.
45:51Not bad for a slow day in Hazard.
46:22There, we'll be right back.
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