- 2 days ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:00On the Duke.
00:02There ain't no way a hog would be attracted to a Duke.
00:06Daisy and I getting married.
00:08What?
00:09Daisy Duke is marrying a hog.
00:12I'm not giving her up.
00:17I just can't stop seeing him.
00:24Somebody done scuffed my vehicle.
00:27Think thin.
00:34Just a good old boy.
00:38Never meaning no harm.
00:42Beats all you never saw.
00:44Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born.
00:48Straightening the curves.
00:52Flattening the hills.
00:56Someday the mountain might get them, but the law never will.
01:01Making their way the only way they know how.
01:08That's just a little bit more than the law will allow.
01:13Just a good old boy.
01:17Wouldn't change if they could.
01:21Fighting the system like a two modern-day Robin Hood.
01:38It all started out to be one of them peaceful hazard momentants.
01:46Guess it was mine too peaceful.
01:52There's nuts.
01:57Now, friends, it was only a doorbanger.
01:59But it sure was about to churn things up for the Dukes.
02:02Especially Daisy.
02:03Where in the heck did you learn to drive?
02:05Correspondent school?
02:06Hey, what's the big idea not yielding, you country hick?
02:09I hit that intersection first.
02:11Now, we got the right-of-way.
02:12Plus, you're supposed to come to a full stop.
02:14All horse taters.
02:15Now, frankly, I didn't see what happened.
02:17I was reading these financial reports.
02:18That's just great.
02:19Now, who the heck are you?
02:20The name's Jamie Lee Hogg.
02:22Jamie Lee Hogg.
02:23Well, that's fine.
02:24You're hogging a dang road.
02:25Couldn't be any relation to J.D., his nephew from Atlanta.
02:28And you's the one's hogging the road.
02:30You're going to cough up for the damages.
02:32Oh, that's where you're wrong.
02:32We ain't going to pay you one blame nickel.
02:34Look, you caused an accident.
02:36You're lying through your teeth, boy.
02:38How'd you like to lose yours, boy?
02:39Come on.
02:40All right.
02:41Hold it.
02:42Just freeze it right there, you Duke boys.
02:45Now, what's going on here?
02:47Nothing's going on.
02:49These two dang near killed us.
02:50I hit the intersection first, Sheriff.
02:52These fellas didn't yield the right-of-way.
02:54I call that reckless driving a fever I seen.
02:57Yeah.
02:57You is just lying through your teeth, ain't you?
02:59You're asking for it, plow boy.
03:01Go ahead.
03:01Wait, wait, wait, wait.
03:02Just a minute here.
03:03I'm the sheriff around here.
03:05Don't you see this badge here?
03:06It says sheriff.
03:07S-H-E.
03:08Excuse me, Sheriff.
03:09There seems to be some difference.
03:11Hush.
03:11I'm not through yet.
03:12R-I-F.
03:13The name's Jamie Lee Hogg.
03:15I don't care if your name is Hogg.
03:18Hogg?
03:18Jamie Lee Hogg?
03:20Who?
03:21You mean to tell me you're that rich and fabulous, wealthy nephew of Boss Hogg?
03:27The same.
03:28Oh, well, welcome to Hazard County.
03:30Good, good.
03:31Well, there's no doubt about who's guilty and who's not.
03:34Now, Hogg.
03:34All right.
03:35Come on, you little.
03:35Come on.
03:36Come on.
03:36We'll see you later.
03:37Well, now, that doorbanger was just the beginning, and things went downhill from there.
03:42Old Boss was as happy as a hog-eating slop with his unexpected visit from his kin, especially
03:47with the present that his nephew was bringing him, Jalen Chargers against the Duke boys.
03:52Jamie Lee Hogg!
03:53Jamie Lee Hogg, my own baby brother's boy.
03:56Oh, my.
03:57Welcome to Hazard.
03:58What a surprise.
03:59I heard you had a little trouble coming into town.
04:01But anyhow, it sure is good to see you.
04:04A real hog.
04:05Tall, handsome, charming.
04:07Full of beans.
04:08Yeah, yeah.
04:09Will you hush?
04:10There ain't no way to talk about Boss's favorite nephew.
04:13Hey, Boss, I caught him fighting like the third monkey on the gangplank of Noah's Ark.
04:17All right, Roscoe, just take him off to the pokey, and then you impound that dangerous orange
04:21clunker car of theirs until they pay every penny of the damages they've done with their reckless
04:26driver.
04:26Oh, wait a minute.
04:27Impound a General Lee?
04:28You can't do that.
04:29Just hold it, hold it, hold it.
04:30What's going on here, J.D.?
04:32Uncle Jesse's trying to railroad us.
04:34Yeah, we had some sort of accident.
04:35There weren't no accident.
04:36Well, that's a load of horse feed.
04:38This here's my fine-outstanding nephew, Jimmy Lee Hogg, and he says you did it, and if
04:42he says you did it, you done it.
04:44Well, I say if he's a hog, his word don't mean dilly squat.
04:47Well, from that fire in your eyes, you must be a duke.
04:49Daisy Duke's the name, and you can just back off of my cousins, because they didn't do anything
04:53to you.
04:53Well, all right, all right.
04:54Enough of this procrastinating.
04:56Roscoe, lock them up.
04:57Right.
04:57Now, just hold it right there, J.D.
05:00You're ganging up on my nephews, and I ain't gonna allow it.
05:03Oh, no?
05:04Well, let me tell you, if we're ganging up on anybody, it's because you dukes are a bunch
05:08of no-good, worthless, law-breaking scallow eggs.
05:11You can't talk to my Uncle Jesse like that.
05:13Oh, I can't, can I?
05:14No.
05:14And when it comes to lying and cheating and thieving, you hogs is the worst skunk phase.
05:20Whoa, wait a minute.
05:22Maybe we could jump out.
05:22Oh, why don't you just shut your snoot and put it back in your trough?
05:25Oh, you see there?
05:26That's why she talks to you, because she's a dude.
05:28She wants to take that and just cut it over your knee, huh?
05:30Get over here.
05:31Who are you calling him?
05:32Make sure they don't start to go right.
05:33And get him off of the street.
05:35I don't want to hear any more about my nephew, because I...
05:37Oh, they're getting away, they're getting away.
05:39Wait, wait, wait, where?
05:40They're just...
05:41Freeze!
05:42Oh, baby, baby!
05:47There, you see, you see?
05:48There's your proof.
05:49Now, who's bringing them in there?
05:51Their precious nephews are yours that's escaped in custody.
05:54That's because you and your precious nephew forced him into it.
05:58Oh!
05:58Oh, baby, baby.
06:00Oh, Uncle Jesse.
06:02This is all you're doing.
06:03Oh, don't listen to her.
06:04Come on, come on, Jamie Lee.
06:06Let's go inside.
06:07Why, with these dukes about, the air around here sure is getting awful polluted.
06:10Come on.
06:11Hush.
06:12Just hush.
06:13I said, come on, will you?
06:15And, Cooter, you just fix up my nephew's car pronto and hold the bill for them duke boys.
06:21Oh, yeah.
06:22Come on, Jamie Lee.
06:24Come on.
06:25Just what we need.
06:26Another hog and hazard.
06:52You caught me right in the middle of my morning snack.
06:55Oh, you care to join me?
06:57I'm having belly burgers smothered in greens.
06:59Uh, no, thank you.
07:00You go right ahead, though.
07:01Yeah, well, I will, but you don't know what you're missing.
07:03Now, Uncle, did you have to be so rough on those dukes?
07:08Don't mention that name while I'm eating.
07:10And what do you mean rough, anyhow?
07:11Oh, out there.
07:12Yeah.
07:13Well, nephew, you just don't know what goes on in these here small towns.
07:17And, uh, speaking of small towns, what you doing here from the big city, anyhow?
07:21I thought maybe my favorite uncle and I might do a little business.
07:25Business, huh?
07:26Well, maybe I will.
07:28What kind of business did you have in mind, nephew?
07:30Now, you know that broken-down old hog grits mill?
07:33Yeah, that old grits mill.
07:34I know it.
07:35The one you've been losing so much money on?
07:37Who said?
07:38I thought maybe I'd take that off your hands.
07:40Well, if it is losing so much money, and mind you, I ain't seen it is or it ain't.
07:45How come you're so interested in it anyhow?
07:48Oh, I was just gonna use it as a, uh, as a tax loss.
07:51Oh, a tax loss, huh?
07:54I am willing to pay cash.
07:59Friends, cash is the one word that rings old boss's bell.
08:03So the hogs started dealing, and the dukes, well, did you ever try to run a race in country traffic?
08:19Come on, truck.
08:22I'm gonna have to go around it.
08:23I can't, I'm not standing.
08:28All right, you dudes, pull it over there.
08:30I'm serious this time.
08:32I got you.
08:32Hey, Ross, go look out.
08:34Oh, no, you're not fooling me to follow each other.
08:37No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
09:01All right.
09:02We better go find Jamie Lee in the lion driver, kids.
09:07Meanwhile, back in town, Jamie Lee was heading for the local hotel.
09:10And who should he run into, but I'm afraid to think of what I think is coming.
09:15You got your cotton-picking nerve, Mr. Jamie Lee Hogg, coming into our town and making trouble.
09:21I'm telling you, my cousins never lie.
09:23And if they say that accident wasn't their fault, you can bet your silly granddad wasn't.
09:27I'm sorry you're so upset, Miss Duke.
09:30Well, why shouldn't I be?
09:31On account of you, my blood cousins, Bo and Luke, are running from justice.
09:35Hog justice.
09:36You say hog as if it's a dirty word.
09:39As far as us Dukes are concerned, it is.
09:41Well, I'd like to do something to change that image.
09:43Huh.
09:43I'd drop all the charges against your cousin.
09:45Oh, sure. Just drop all the charges?
09:47Of course.
09:48With an outstanding character reference, such as yourself, why Bo and Luke must be telling the truth.
09:52He ain't John, man.
09:54Certainly not.
09:54I owe you and your family an apology for all the heartache I've caused.
09:59Well, that's silver-tongued snake.
10:02Car's all fixed, Jamie Lee.
10:03Here's a call coming in for you.
10:05Excuse me, Miss Duke.
10:07Oh, Daisy.
10:09Don't you be thinking that.
10:10It's a boss calling from Savannah.
10:13Hey, Roy.
10:14Is it a go?
10:15Sure is.
10:15I made a deal on that gristmill.
10:17Free.
10:18Get everything rolling to make sure nothing goes wrong.
10:21There's millions in this for us.
10:23Keep in touch.
10:26Is that a way, Floyd?
10:29How about that accident?
10:31We're cooling it.
10:32I knew that boy wasn't nothing but low rent.
10:34I'm sorry we were interrupted.
10:36Is there someplace we can go and talk?
10:38Well, there's the boys, Nast.
10:40Well, shall we?
10:43Miss Duke?
10:44Daisy.
10:45Daisy.
10:47Okay.
10:48Jamie Lee.
10:52I knew we'd get her in the car.
10:59Well, the boys had lost old Roscoe, but their trouble pot was just to buy them.
11:12Now, there's Jamie Lee's car.
11:14Sure is.
11:15There, get it.
11:17Jamie Lee!
11:18Hey, pull up!
11:22Careful!
11:23Dang it if Daisy ain't falling for old Silvertone, and the Duke boys are just falling.
11:28Shoot.
11:37Those are my cousins!
11:39Hey, look at these!
11:51All right, Turkey, now you're really asking for it.
11:53Dang, Daisy!
11:54Daisy, what are you doing with these two guys?
11:56Jamie Lee dropped all the charges.
11:57He did what?
11:58Yes, he dropped all the charges.
12:00You boys are in the clear.
12:01Then what was all this back here?
12:02Sorry about that.
12:04You fellas sure took me by surprise.
12:06I'm sorry, too.
12:07Chalked the whole thing up.
12:08One big misunderstanding.
12:10Isn't this something?
12:11Jamie Lee sure isn't what he appeared to be, huh?
12:14Just hold it right there, you Duke boys.
12:16Good, Daisy.
12:17I got you this time.
12:18You're not going to get away.
12:19I'm going to cuff you and stuff you.
12:20Put the gun away, Sheriff.
12:22There's no need to arrest him.
12:23Are you kidding me?
12:24I'm dropping the charges.
12:25You're a hog, aren't you?
12:26Hog don't do anything good for nobody.
12:28Well, this one does.
12:29We'll see you later, huh?
12:31See you, fellas.
12:39What was G. Hush a fan?
12:41About to say the same thing, more or less.
12:44What?
12:45What'd you say?
12:48Come on, repeat that.
12:49I said Jamie Lee dropped the charges on the Duke boys.
12:53Yeah, he dropped the charges.
12:54Well, that's bad enough.
12:56But no, I meant repeat that other part.
12:58Well, it appears to me like Jamie Lee hog is sweet on Daisy Duke.
13:04Well, it appears to me you don't know sweet from sour.
13:07No?
13:08No.
13:08Because what you say is absolutely positively dang impossible.
13:12Yeah?
13:13Yeah.
13:13There ain't no way a hog would be attracted to a Duke.
13:18Hmm.
13:19Hmm.
13:23I seen it, but ain't believing it.
13:25I don't see any self-respecting Duke can like a hog.
13:28There ain't no way.
13:30Absolutely ain't no way.
13:32Maybe, maybe, just maybe, mind you.
13:35This, uh, Jamie Lee might be a different kind of home.
13:38He dropped the charges and apologized.
13:40Daisy likes him.
13:41You know, he might be an all right fella.
13:43An all right fella, my shovel.
13:45Scratch any hog deep enough, you're bound to find something rotten.
13:48True.
13:49Sad, but true.
13:55Well, old Bo's right.
13:56Jamie Lee's really making money.
13:58And I mean making money.
14:16Boy, that fella sure do work fast.
14:34Now, I don't know about y'all, but I'm sure getting a sinking feeling.
14:40It's a nice little spot that I'm going to show you up here.
14:43It's...
14:44Jamie!
14:45Jamie!
14:55Oh, I can't believe this is happening.
14:58How am I going to catch all the butterflies you're making me feel?
15:00You were really something special.
15:07Now, Jamie Lee hog, if what I hear is true, there's something I got to tell you and lay down
15:12the law.
15:13Now, you're my own baby brother's boy and he ain't here to tell you.
15:16So, I'm going to have to be your daddy in his place.
15:18And I'm going to have to insist that you stop running around with Daisy Duke.
15:24I'm going to have to insist that you cease and desist from having any contact...
15:30Whatsoever.
15:31...with that female.
15:32I mean, just being seen with her is ruining our family image.
15:35Well, I'm sorry you feel that way, Uncle Jefferson.
15:38Daisy's a fine girl and I'm not giving her up.
15:41Yeah, but...
15:41But...
15:42Now, if you'll excuse me, sir.
15:44Jamie Lee!
15:45Now, listen.
15:46What?
15:47Wait a minute here.
15:48I ain't finished.
15:50Did you hear that, Oscar?
15:51Did you hear that?
15:52I knew it.
15:52I mean, my own flesh and blood.
15:54My very image.
15:56And he wants to socialize with them dukes.
15:58Oh, well.
15:58It's enough to give my hog blood a conniption.
16:01Listen, boss.
16:02If you don't mind me saying so, you know that Jamie Lee ain't exactly like your image.
16:07No?
16:08No.
16:08I mean, he's got a full set of hair.
16:11And he ain't got your beady brown eyes.
16:14Yeah, but...
16:14And your fat, chubby little cheek.
16:16Oh, and a little...
16:17Listen.
16:18Listen here.
16:19I gotta tell you something.
16:20And I don't know how to say it.
16:22He just...
16:23Well, don't beat around the bush.
16:25Go on, say it.
16:26Well, it's hard.
16:29He's nice.
16:31I know it.
16:33That's what worries me.
16:36And meanwhile, over at the Duke farm, well, there's more of the same goings on.
16:40Daisy, ever since you started seeing fellas, there ain't never been one.
16:44That I ask you to stop seeing.
16:46But, well, I just don't think this Jamie Lee fella's right for you.
16:51Jamie Lee's the kindest, sweetest, gentlest, smartest, best thing that ever happened to me.
16:57I'm sorry, Uncle Jesse.
16:59I just can't stop seeing him.
17:06I hurt her bad.
17:10Maybe we're wrong.
17:12Maybe we're right.
17:13We gotta check out this Jamie Lee.
17:15Settle this once and for all.
17:16Well, uh...
17:18Don't let her know what you're doing.
17:21I don't want to hurt her any worse than I already have.
17:29And so, for openers, Luke called a newspaper pal of his in Atlanta and started digging.
17:34Okay, thanks a lot, Scoop.
17:36Bo says, hey, give our best to kids.
17:38Adios.
17:40Well, for some of the rich, successful hotshot who made a fortune in the market, ain't nobody
17:44in Atlanta ever heard of Jamie Lee hog.
17:46Uh-huh.
17:47Scoop says he checked the news desk, the business editor, society editor.
17:50Nobody's heard a thing.
17:51Yeah, we don't know what the heck he's doing in Hazard.
17:53Especially don't know why he bought that old grits mill.
17:55Well, it's next on the list.
17:57Let's hit it.
17:58All right.
18:00All right.
18:03All right.
18:04All right.
18:19Don't you know any speed, but too fast.
18:22You've got a lot of room to talk.
18:34I'll see you later, honey.
18:37Bye-bye.
18:38Bye.
18:41I've never seen Daisy this far-gone-off fellow.
18:44Yeah, and it would have to be with a dang hog.
18:45Yeah, he better watch himself.
18:47When he steps out of line, he's going to have to answer to me.
18:49If he steps out of line, he's going to have to answer to both of us.
18:51Come on.
19:01Well, I can tell y'all one thing.
19:05Old boss is going to be upset.
19:07Now, he ain't going to mind Jamie Lee doing a little bit of counterfeiting.
19:10But boss sure don't want Jamie working for no Yankee.
19:12That's it.
19:12You're a rough-looking customer.
19:14Yeah, let's get down there.
19:16See if we can't get a better look.
19:17Watch yourself.
19:19Ah.
19:19You're working hard.
19:22What do you think?
19:22Well, let's take a look around.
19:46Hey, hey, look, look at this.
19:47It says here that this car is registered to the Dixie Praline Company in Savannah.
19:51Hey, look at these here bottles.
19:53Don't you got shine?
19:54Unless it's green shine.
19:56Looks like some sort of pre-nergy.
19:58Think's in the back of that car.
19:59Now, hurry up.
20:00Yes.
20:04Come on.
20:04Come on.
20:25Now, that old grits mill was beginning to look like a camp meet, with everybody showing up.
20:39What the heck are we doing here, anyway?
20:41Well, I want to check up on my nephew, Jamie Lee.
20:43Jamie Lee's not acting like a hog, is he?
20:45He acts like he's going to plumb out of his mind.
20:47You think his brain's warped?
20:49It could be.
20:50That's why I want to take a gander and see what he's got going on at this old grits mill.
20:55And I'm praying for his sake, it ain't nothing above board.
20:59Well, let's go take a look-see.
21:02Just be quiet.
21:03Don't make a sound.
21:04Don't make a sound.
21:05Good.
21:06Good, look at that.
21:07I love it.
21:07Oh, gee, Roscoe!
21:09Just, will you?
21:11Come on.
21:12Pretty hard to believe.
21:14There's no boys!
21:15Look at that!
21:16What are you two doing out here?
21:17A little snipe hunting or what?
21:18Roscoe arrest them.
21:19Right.
21:19You're under arrest.
21:21What am I arresting them for?
21:22Yeah, that's about that's the same thing.
21:23What for?
21:25For trespassing on private property, that's what's for.
21:27Well, she's got to be out of your mind.
21:29No, he ain't out of his mind.
21:31No, I'm going to show that goody-two-shoes nephew of mine that all you dukes belong in the hooscow.
21:36All right, put out your hands.
21:39Him first.
21:39Yeah, what about my feet?
21:41There's no, Roscoe!
21:42Oh, get it!
21:43Get out of me, will you scow!
21:47Oh, Roscoe, you mudhole!
21:48Look what, you slapped them cuffs on me!
21:50I didn't know they'd fit on your pudgy little wrist.
21:53That's because you didn't use your pudgy little dreams.
21:56Come on, get me out of this, will you, before that duke boy's escaped?
21:58Bad news, bad news.
22:00The keys are in the car.
22:02Oh, come on, help me too!
22:04Here, little fat buddy.
22:05All right, let's go!
22:12Good thing we made a getaway.
22:14We ain't going to do Daisy no good behind bars.
22:17Turn on.
22:22Well, now, how about that?
22:23They're shipping out that funny money all over the country in cases of grits.
22:27Now, that just goes to show you how much grits is catching on.
22:30Let's go, let's go, let's go.
22:32Let's go, let's go.
22:41Let's go.
22:42Jamie Lee?
22:44That's Hulk, sweetie pop.
22:46Quick, catch him.
22:48I'll be right with you, honey.
22:56Jamie Leary.
22:58Hi, baby.
23:00Now, I miss you too, honey, but...
23:02You left your wallet in the chain.
23:04I told you, sugar.
23:05You're making me do some strange things.
23:07Yeah?
23:08Thanks.
23:10Hey.
23:11Jamie!
23:14What's your cash?
23:15Jamie, $300.
23:17Ah, yes.
23:18We were just checking through the petty cash.
23:20Thanks again, honey.
23:22Bye, Flo.
23:23Bye, Miss Daisy.
23:25Starting to pick up after me now.
23:26I'm even starting to like it.
23:29I'll let you get back to your work.
23:31Bye.
23:32Bye-bye.
23:45That chick saw these hot bills.
23:47Yeah, but she couldn't tell they were phony.
23:48Well, how do we know?
23:50No telling what else she's seen or heard.
23:52Right.
23:53We got a perfect setup here, and you got to start playing around.
23:56Now, look, Mr. Leary.
23:56No, you look!
23:57All my life, I've been searching for a deal like this, and I ain't letting it go down the drain.
24:01You're going to have to put her away.
24:04I can't.
24:05I'm falling in love with her.
24:07Look, pretty boy.
24:08I got millions writing on this.
24:10You do something about her.
24:13I will.
24:35Well, if any of y'all ever drive through,
24:38hazard, well, you might remember that if it's got wheels, folks tend to want to race it.
24:46Do something.
24:47Think thin.
24:50Woo!
24:51Uh, hey!
24:56Sometimes things just work out.
24:58Oh, look at that!
24:59Look at that!
25:06And sometimes they doesn't.
25:11Nothing hurt but their pride, looks like.
25:13Let's go.
25:16Oh, we better get us over to a pay phone.
25:18Check out that registration.
25:20Come back in!
25:21Here.
25:22Take my gun.
25:23Move it.
25:24Wait a minute, Mr. Landry.
25:25If you're worried about Daisy talking,
25:28I have another way of shutting her up.
25:31Sure you have.
25:32I don't have to kill her.
25:34I could marry her.
25:35She's flipping out.
25:36Well, if she's my wife, she can't legally testify against me.
25:38That's the law in all 50 states.
25:40There's no way she could blow the whistle.
25:41I know the law, but I don't get it.
25:43You'd really marry this chick?
25:46I sure would.
25:47I love her.
25:59Meanwhile, like everybody says,
26:00the buttermilk's getting thicker,
26:02and the Duke boys were putting in a call to Savannah Information.
26:06Yeah, operator, I'd like the number for the Dixie Praline Company.
26:09Yeah, that's it.
26:11What's that?
26:11You got no number for them?
26:13You sure now?
26:14Hold on a minute.
26:15I just asked.
26:17All right, thanks a lot.
26:18Much obliged.
26:20The phony registration, that figures.
26:22Yeah.
26:23It means the driver's probably phony, too.
26:24If Jamie Lee mixed up with somebody like that,
26:26you can bet there's trouble brewing somewhere.
26:28Much as I hate to bring it up,
26:29looks like you and me got to talk to Daisy.
26:32Come on.
26:33My name first, huh?
26:34Then you do it.
26:35Me do it?
26:36Come on.
26:37Hey, you're older.
26:39Not much.
26:39Enough.
26:45Uh-oh.
26:46I've been a dread in this.
26:48Marry you?
26:49You'd make me the happiest man in the entire state of Georgia.
26:52Jamie, what are our families going to say?
26:54It doesn't matter if we get married right away.
26:57It matters to me.
26:58I'll tell you what, darling.
27:00We'll have a little get-together, make the announcement.
27:03When they see how much in love we are, they couldn't possibly object.
27:07Say yes.
27:08This is Daisy Hogg.
27:10That's going to take some getting used to.
27:12But I like the sound of it already.
27:15Thanks, sir.
27:16Friends, that comes on like a mouthful of root canals.
27:19I got a premonition and I ain't too happy about it.
27:22Well, all the parts showin' up here.
27:24Ain't bad news.
27:26And so Daisy and Jamie Lee each invited everybody to a meet
27:29for an important announcement.
27:31Daisy and I getting married?
27:33There's nothing like a wedding to draw folks together.
27:35I'm married, married over my dead partner here.
27:38Well, Daisy, marriage is a very serious thing now.
27:43Jamie Lee Hogg, you ain't getting yourself hitched up
27:45to know Noah Count Duke.
27:47What do you mean Noah Count Duke, you over-swilled hog?
27:50Can you calm down, Uncle Jefferson?
27:53Calm down?
27:54When I'm facing a family disgrace?
27:56Well, I can hear ten generations of hogs
27:58are spinnin' in their graves.
27:59Spinnin'?
28:00Spinnin' at the trough, you mean?
28:02Now, wait a minute, Jesse Duke.
28:03I don't want to hear you talkin' to me like that.
28:04No siree box.
28:05And I don't want to hear language like that
28:06in my own boy's nest, either.
28:12Dang fuel pump.
28:14Every time we want to get somewhere is in a hurry.
28:16Well, if you didn't take so dang long
28:17to fix it in the first place,
28:18maybe we'd get there.
28:19I could help you, you know.
28:19I could help you.
28:20Let's just hope we're in time to stop Daisy
28:22from doing something foolish.
28:23I'd help you if I knew anything about mechanics.
28:25All I knew was drive.
28:25Now, wait a minute.
28:27One, Jesse Duke, you hush up.
28:29And two, I'm tellin' you, Jamie Lee,
28:31you can put this marriage right out of your mind.
28:34Daisy, you just can't go jumpin' into this thing.
28:37I know, Uncle Jesse.
28:38We love each other.
28:39Oh, speak for yourself.
28:41Ain't no way a hawk can love the Duke.
28:43Now, wait a minute.
28:44And you hush up, you hear me?
28:45We are too late.
28:47Daisy, hold on a minute.
28:49We gotta talk to you.
28:50Oh, good news.
28:52Good news, those Dukes.
28:52All right, you Dukes, you're under arrest.
28:54And this time, I'm gonna...
28:56Forget it.
28:56Forget it.
28:57Forget it.
28:58You say forget it?
28:59Yeah, forget it.
28:59But they were trespassing illegally.
29:01Oh, they're small potatoes.
29:02Right now, I'm facing a real catastrophe.
29:05Uncle Jefferson, Mr. Duke,
29:07Daisy and I truly wanna be married.
29:08We'd love to do it with your blessing.
29:10Yes, please, Uncle Jesse.
29:12Uh-uh.
29:13Absolutely not.
29:14But Uncle Jefferson, do...
29:16Boy, I gotta talk to you.
29:18Now, you listen to me, and you listen good.
29:20We don't mean to give you no advice about nothing, but, uh...
29:22Just one or two things about this Jamie Lee
29:24that we can't pin down.
29:25Uh, listen to the boys now, Daisy.
29:27They-they-they're only saying it for your own good.
29:29Please, all of you.
29:31For the first time in my life, I'm really in love.
29:34Now, you can't hold me back.
29:35Bird's gotta fly.
29:36But, Daisy...
29:37Oh, I heard that.
29:38Well, you can fly all you want.
29:40Only you ain't making no nest with no home.
29:43I'm sorry, Uncle Jefferson.
29:44I don't care what you say.
29:45I'm marrying Daisy.
29:46And I'm sorry, too.
29:47But I know y'all are just condemning Jamie Lee
29:49because of his name.
29:51But it don't matter to me.
29:52I'm gonna be a hog.
29:54I'm gonna be Mrs. Daisy hog.
29:56I can't stand...
29:58I can't stand the sound of that name.
30:01Oh, my little fat buddy, I know.
30:04If you can give me a quiz.
30:06Oh, what a mess.
30:08Well, sir, I'll tell you one thing.
30:10Folks hadn't been this shook up
30:11since they heard Sherman was marching on Haskin'.
30:16Hey!
30:17Did you hear a Duke's mariner hog?
30:19No, the Duke's marrying a hulk!
30:21Hey!
30:22Duke's marrying a hulk!
30:28Hey, Jim!
30:29Did you hear the news?
30:29Daisy Duke is marrying a hulk!
30:31Hey!
30:35Are you all right?
30:37Yeah.
30:37Yeah, I'm all right.
30:39Now, some folks sure took it hard.
30:42Roscoe.
30:42What?
30:43Do you realize that if Daisy Duke and Jamie Lee Hog get married,
30:51them Duke boys will be my hog-in-laws?
30:55Yeah.
30:55Mm-hmm.
30:56And who am I gonna chase?
30:57You know, I can't arrest relatives.
30:59Yeah, I've always made that my prime rule.
31:01And being relatives, they'd be entitled to a cut of your cut of the tea.
31:07That little, huh?
31:07And can you imagine me looking over the Thanksgiving table and seeing Duke's on the other side of the turkey
31:14stuffing, cranberry sauce, candied yams, Ghibli gravy, pumpkin pie, and ice cream?
31:23Be enough to make me lose my appetite.
31:26It makes me hungry.
31:29Oh, little fat buddy, you just go ahead and cry.
31:32Get it all out.
31:33Listen, there ain't no shame on that here.
31:35Use my hanky or you'll go ahead.
31:46Meanwhile, Bo and Luke were still trying to find out the truth about Jamie Lee.
31:50And Luke suddenly remembered about that green ink that he saw at the grits mill.
31:54Mr. Pratt?
31:55Come on, howdy, boys.
31:56How you doing?
31:57Luke, I mean, you got a question.
31:58What would somebody want green printer's ink for?
32:01Well, now, just what kind of green printer's ink you talking about, son?
32:04Well, I got a pretty good look at the bottle.
32:05It was medium, fine, shade 4C.
32:09That's the type you'd usually use for fine, detailed printing, or artwork, or designing,
32:17or, uh, if you're the U.S. Mint, for printing money.
32:21Printing money?
32:22Yeah.
32:23I've been of any help to you?
32:24Yes, sir.
32:24A lot of help.
32:25Come back, boys.
32:26Much obliged.
32:26Thank you, Mr. Pratt.
32:29You thinking what I'm thinking?
32:31You bet.
32:31Old grits mill and that green ink and that buddy of his.
32:34And printing money.
32:35He's up to some counterfeiting, sounds like to me.
32:37Let's go.
32:37Let's do it.
32:48Now, believe me, love, the way our families are carrying on, we've got no choice but to
32:53go across the border to Greenville, but the justice of the peace marriage.
32:56What, you mean, alone?
32:57Yeah.
32:58Jamie!
32:59I, well, my Uncle Jesse and the boys, I can't do that to them.
33:06Why do I have to think it over?
33:07Oh, Lord, it's all right, honey.
33:09Look, I've got to go back to the mill.
33:10Why don't you meet me there by three, and I hope you think it over my way.
34:03Why don't you meet me there by three, and I hope you've got to get this ship in on the
34:06road.
34:06Come on, get that box on.
34:11All right.
34:13Tie it down right.
34:16You guys are slower than the masses.
34:27All right, let's go.
34:29Come on.
34:52Hey, look, there's some more of them little green bottles.
34:56Looks like they're packing grits all right.
34:59Maybe they're putting a prize in each package, too.
35:02It's hard to say exactly what's going on, but something is.
35:11You know, I used to have a teacher that did that.
35:19Hey, look out, Luke!
35:30Okay, get him up, you two.
35:32Oh, and Luke, Duke, what are you doing here?
35:35I caught him snooping around, that's what.
35:37Snooping?
35:38We, from the bride's side of the family, we stopped by to get some grits for the ceremony.
35:41Right, because we heard that the Charles grits were the best in the hazard.
35:45You and your big, fat ideas, I told you.
35:47You should have knocked off that chick.
35:49What are you talking about?
35:50Jamie Lee, what'd you get our cousin into?
35:52I'm sorry, fellas.
35:53I never intended to get her involved.
35:55Oh, can the soap opera hog.
35:59Ty and gag those two rooms, and let's start packing.
36:01We're moving out fast.
36:03Daisy's meeting me here at three.
36:04Good.
36:06That's the first good thing you've done.
36:08We're taking her with us.
36:09Hey, wait a minute, you can't do that.
36:10What kind of snake are you, anyway?
36:12Turn him up faster, I will.
36:13You shut up, cowboy.
36:15All right.
36:16Come on, huh?
36:18Hey, move, lover boy.
36:19Let's go.
36:25Well, it sure looks like Daisy's done made her decision.
36:28And for my money, it's a wrong one.
36:33Now, boss had Cletus staking out the farm.
36:35He figured them two lovers might try to elope.
36:53Cletus called boss, who called Jesse?
36:56Nothing makes enemies work together like a mutual adversity.
36:59That's right, Jesse.
36:59That's right.
37:00Elope.
37:01As much as we don't ever agree on nothing, no how.
37:03You can say that again.
37:04We've got to band together now to stop this horrible event from occurring.
37:09Right here, RGD.
37:10Right here.
37:11I'll tell you what.
37:11I'll meet you at the junction.
37:13I'm on my way.
37:17Elope.
37:18Can't imagine.
37:18Maybe a lope?
37:20No way.
37:21That can't be.
37:30Okay, we're about ready to roll.
37:41Hi, honey.
37:43Guess what my answer is?
37:44Yeah.
37:46Yes!
37:48Now, look, honey.
37:49I've got to make an emergency delivery, but I'll be right back.
37:52Emergency delivery of grits?
37:53Enough of this jive and hog.
37:56You're coming with us.
37:57Jamie Lee, what's going on?
37:58Why has he got a gun?
38:00You'll soon find out, sugar.
38:02Now, Mr. Landry, you leave her out of this.
38:03Are you kidding?
38:05She's going to guarantee a safe passage out of here.
38:07Into the car.
38:08Both of you.
38:16Come on.
38:17I know you're not my uncle, Jess.
38:18Look.
38:18All right.
38:19Come on.
38:19Let's see what's going on down there.
38:21What's going on here?
38:22What?
38:22It looks like they have one of them old shotgun weddings, but he's using a pistol.
38:25You keep your hands off of her.
38:29What's she doing to my Jamie Lee?
38:31And my Daisy.
38:32Move.
38:35We've got to get down there and stop.
38:37Come on.
38:37Come on.
38:38Come on, let's go.
38:39Come on.
38:39Yeah.
38:40All right, move it.
38:41Get in, get in.
38:42I've got to get this thing started.
38:43Come on now.
38:44All right, let them go first.
38:46You go first, then.
38:47Here, come on.
38:49All right.
38:50Come on.
38:54Come on.
38:54Come on.
38:54Get up there, kid.
39:16Oh, damn.
39:17I'm a rascal.
39:18Wait for me.
39:19Yeah.
39:20And wait for me.
39:23Wait for me, too.
39:24You cleanish.
39:30Come here.
39:31Go.
39:32Don't let it stop you.
39:33Keep moving.
39:34That's it.
39:34Now that's it.
39:35I'm going to tell you.
39:39What?
39:50Look at you.
40:02I like you, Corbett.
40:05Thanks a lot.
40:13You got Daisy. We gotta catch him. Come on, let's get out of here.
40:20Don't lose him and I'll have your bed, you hear me?
40:23Come on, come on.
40:36Better get a move on if we're gonna catch him.
40:52Get out of here!
40:59Get out of here!
41:00Get out of here!
41:01Get out of here!
41:04Just a little bit.
41:05We all look all right, Corbett. We can't stop.
41:07Let's go.
41:11Why is that so good?
41:12He was only marrying you to shut you up.
41:16I think I was dumb enough to fall for all of that phony stuff about loving me.
41:19I do love you and I meant what I said about marrying her.
41:22Now, Landry, you let her go. She'll promise not to talk.
41:24I ain't promising no such thing.
41:42You got it.
41:48Open her up, Sean.
41:49You got it.
41:54We're doing a little business of our own.
41:56Gotcha.
42:11All right.
42:13Let's go get number two.
42:18Let's go no faster, Roscoe.
42:21But just get that one away from me.
42:24Save yourself.
42:25Chef!
42:26No!
42:38All right.
42:39Now he's out of the way, baby.
42:41Get in the mess, boy.
42:44Oh!
42:45Somebody's done stuff in my vehicle!
42:48Oh!
42:59Somebody's done stuff in my vehicle!
43:00Get in the way, sir.
43:01He's not got air conditioning.
43:02I'd like to air conditioning your hair, you dipstick.
43:04Will you two just stop doing it!
43:07You wouldn't be gonna stop that with it!
43:28Hey!
43:29That there's terrible!
43:31Let's go get Daisy.
43:32All right.
43:36I'll scuff this thing to a nub.
43:38Pay attention to the rope, will you?
43:41All right, please. Let me handle this.
43:43Honey, me. I'm phony.
43:45I ain't going with you. No place, no house.
43:47Now stop the car. I'm getting out of here.
43:48I'm getting it, honey.
43:49You sit back nice and peaceful.
43:51Sugar, I'll waste you right here.
43:56I can slow down a little bit.
43:58It's easy to fight the chance.
44:01It looks like some sort of ruckus up ahead of me.
44:04Okay, you asking for it.
44:06Don't let her go.
44:07You stay out of this or you're going to get it, too.
44:09Hang on. Be real careful. This one counts.
44:12Got it.
44:20All right, hold it steady, Bo.
44:21Gotcha.
44:25Hey, you reckon it's going to end up
44:28with that gun.
44:34Don't worry about it. It'll be all right.
44:36I hope so.
44:41All of you, I mean it.
44:42Stay right there.
44:44Well, all right.
44:46You all right, Daisy?
44:47Yeah, I'm all right.
44:48I ain't getting married, but I'm all right.
44:50Well, there you have it, folks.
44:52The counterfeiting ring was finally broken,
44:54but so was Daisy's heart.
44:59Bye, Jamie.
45:01Bye-bye, Daisy.
45:04I sure wish we'd met a lot sooner.
45:06Yeah, it could have been something real special.
45:08I guess it just wasn't meant to be.
45:11Jamie.
45:14There you got my sympathy, J.D.
45:17When your old kin let you down, it's going to hurt.
45:19Oh, it does. It does, Jesse.
45:21I want to thank you very kindly for your sympathy.
45:24I mean, I know you know how I feel,
45:26and you don't know how lucky you are
45:28having two nephews who have died in the world criminals.
45:32What do you mean?
45:34Them boys ain't criminals?
45:36Yeah, well, then what else are they?
45:37Well, they're just good old country boys.
45:40Yeah, they always get old love.
45:41You know, though I'm glad there wasn't no wedding,
45:43ain't it amazing how love can bring enemies together,
45:46even for a short time,
45:47especially in Hazard County.
45:48You know, they're just good old country boys.
46:30YouTube.
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