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00:24I trust the food was to your satisfaction, Colonel.
00:28Your wife is a wonderful cook, Renée. She makes rabbit taste like chicken.
00:33That was chicken, Herr Colonel. Rabbit, as you will of course know, does not have a wishbone.
00:39A wishbone. Good, we can make a wish.
00:42A little more wine? No, we've spent enough already.
00:45This is on the house. Oh, thank you. Come on, Hans, make a wish.
00:50I wish I could see my wife and children again very soon.
00:53You're not supposed to tell your wish, Duncan. You spoil the whole thing.
00:57I'm very sorry, Colonel. Renée, you, make a wish.
01:02Oh, this is a rare honour, Colonel.
01:07Little piggy, sir.
01:13Oh. Dammit, you've won.
01:17Oh, well, you can have my wish, Colonel.
01:20What was it?
01:21You mustn't tell, you spoil it.
01:23It doesn't spoil it if you tell it after.
01:25Oh.
01:25What was it?
01:26Oh, I just wish that this terrible war could be over very soon.
01:31Good. Very good. But which side did you wish to win?
01:35Oh, yours, of course, Herr Colonel.
01:37Sensible fellow.
01:39Dear Colonel, I wonder if I might beg a kindness from you.
01:43My butter is running very low.
01:46If you could let me have a pat or two, just to keep me going.
01:49Of course.
01:50Hans, make a note.
01:51Anything else?
01:52Dare I mention sugar?
01:53Of course.
01:54And five litres of paraffin would be most acceptable.
01:57This may be most difficult.
01:59I have to account for everything in the store.
02:02Room six is at your disposal, Colonel, as usual.
02:06And one of my girls was inquiring after you only five minutes ago.
02:10Which one?
02:11Yvette.
02:13Five litres.
02:15With respect, Herr Colonel, Yvette is ten litres.
02:21Does that include the feather duster?
02:23Of course.
02:27Ten litres.
02:28Ten litres.
02:32Room six for ten litres.
02:33Six for me, four for you.
02:35Oh, not the wet celery and the flying helmet.
02:37No.
02:38The feather duster.
02:40But through in the egg whisk, we might get some gasoline as well.
02:45There is someone to see you in the back room.
02:47Who is it?
02:47It is a woman.
02:48She has a gun.
02:49What?
02:50She does not have a pram, does she?
02:53No.
02:54But she is with two men.
02:55I will see her.
02:57Rene.
02:58What?
02:58Rene, do not think badly of me and the things I do.
03:02I do it for my poor widowed mother.
03:04She needs the paraffin.
03:06She has cold feet.
03:08But she must never, never know how I get it.
03:11Promise?
03:13Yvette, your secret is safe with me and the captain and the colonel.
03:20And the pianist and my wife.
03:23And the ironmonger in the rue de Grenoble.
03:26How does he know about it?
03:28He supplies the feather duster and the egg whisk.
03:35Don't move.
03:35What?
03:36My name is Michel Dubois.
03:37Time is very short.
03:38Listen very carefully.
03:40I shall say this only once.
03:45No, I didn't quite catch your name.
03:50My name is Michel Dubois.
03:52You are René Artois.
03:53Yes, I know that.
03:54I was...
03:54Sit down.
03:55Just listen.
03:58We are members of Laughland.
04:00Our mission is to assist the escape of Allied airmen and get them back to England so they
04:05can fight again.
04:06Until yesterday we had a safe house in Nouvion.
04:09Unfortunately it has been blown.
04:11It was terrible.
04:13It was a little cafe, just like this.
04:16With a patron, just like you.
04:18They took him and his wife out into the town square and shot them in cold blood.
04:23I shall never forget the look on his face as he stood there.
04:26He was the greatest man I ever knew.
04:29He sang the Marseillaise.
04:31Three bars into the second caress.
04:34A volley of shot rang out.
04:36And he slurmed against the ropes that held him to the post.
04:40Why are you telling me this?
04:45Your cafe is to be the next C'est France.
04:50Ah.
04:51Oh well, if you don't mind my saying, it's not a very good choice.
04:56No, this house is most terribly unsafe.
04:59It is crawling with Germans.
05:01But you are on very good terms with them.
05:03Well, yes.
05:04And again, no.
05:05Let us say we get on.
05:06Well, we have to, do we not?
05:07I mean, just because they are the enemy does not mean you can be rude to people.
05:11Not in my business.
05:12Good.
05:13You are about to perform a great service for France.
05:16The escaping airmen will hide here until you give them the forged papers.
05:20Well, where will I get forged papers?
05:22A man will live here in your cellar.
05:24He is an expert forger.
05:26He will forge the papers and give them to you.
05:29Oh, well, could I not just post the papers to wherever the airmen were before they came here?
05:35Save them a journey.
05:36I mean, it's no trouble.
05:37I would even pay for the stamp.
05:40If the letter was intercepted, it would be dressed back to you.
05:43And you would find yourself in the town square.
05:46Dead.
05:48Your way is best.
05:50Well, where is this man who is to do the forging?
05:52Oh, it is better that you do not know his whereabouts.
05:55But for the moment, he is in a very safe place.
06:02How would you like to be down by the center's knee?
06:10Oh, would I give for an hour or two
06:15Under the bridges of Paris with you?
06:19Oh, would I give for an hour or two?
06:34Oh, would I give for an hour or two?
06:46Oh!
07:15I want you in the back room.
07:18What's wrong, Monsieur René? What's about your wife?
07:20This is a matter of utmost urgency.
07:23But with you, it is always a matter of utmost urgency.
07:27We shall be doing this for France.
07:29No, you are the one who does it for France. I'm just a waitress.
07:33Do with your towel!
07:35Yvette, Edith, in the back room.
07:43Michelle, this is my wife, Edith. I have told her everything.
07:46Will she talk?
07:48Incessantly.
07:50But not about anything important. This is Yvette and this is Maria.
07:54Are they with us? Do they understand the need for secrecy?
07:57They will give nothing away, especially this one.
08:01Right. Listen very carefully. I shall say this only once. The forger, Monsieur Leclerc, will arrive tomorrow. You will pass
08:09him off as a cousin who has come to help you in the restaurant.
08:12He will need papers.
08:14He is a forger. He will make his own papers.
08:17Of course. How quickly I have lost the thread of this tapestry of intrigue.
08:23Two British airmen are in a farmhouse 20 miles from here. They will arrive in four days, disguised as onion
08:31sellers.
08:31But onions are not in season.
08:34That is how you will know they are the airmen.
08:38You will conceal them until Monsieur Leclerc has prepared their papers.
08:43Now, did my men come to fix a radio transmitter?
08:46Yes. They have put it in the attic room.
08:48It is the room of my mother.
08:50It is the only place where nobody goes unless they have to.
08:55But I wish to speak with you about that. It is not very convenient.
08:59Show me.
08:59Follow me.
09:06One moment. Is your wife's mother prepared to die for France?
09:10She's been prepared to die for 30 years.
09:13But she doesn't go.
09:15I think God does not want the aggravation.
09:25Visitors, Mama?
09:27What is it?
09:29Visitors to see you.
09:30I do not want to see anybody.
09:33Tell them to come back tomorrow.
09:36They can't. It's the resistance.
09:38I do not need any assistance.
09:42No! It is the French resistance!
09:45You fool!
09:47Do you want the OTAN to hear?
09:50Where is the transmitter?
09:59You see, you see what I mean? It is not very convenient.
10:03Where is the speaker?
10:05That is the other problem.
10:07What is it?
10:08What is it?
10:10What is it?
10:13What is it?
10:15You see, I cannot make her understand that she must not use this one.
10:20She must use the one in the cupboard.
10:24You must use this.
10:25I do not want to go.
10:28No, but when you do, you must use this one.
10:32In front of strangers?
10:37Yvette, have you fixed up the aerial and the earth?
10:40I did as I was shown.
10:41Your men told us to use the metal bed as the aerial and the water pipes as the earth.
10:46Where is the power?
10:48Maria, switch on the power.
10:56You fools! You have earthed my wife's mother!
11:01All right, all right, I give in. I do want to go.
11:05I hope!
11:19Pretty place, France.
11:21Don't you think so, Fairfax?
11:24Napoleon planted all these trees, you know.
11:27Wonder he found time to fight any battles.
11:30He didn't do it personally, fathead.
11:32He had them planted to keep the sun off his troops,
11:35while they were marching up and down.
11:39Have you noticed whenever we pass these peasant people,
11:42they seem to stare at us in rather an odd way?
11:44Maybe it's because you're riding a girl's bicycle.
11:47I think perhaps you're doing something wrong.
12:00Fairfax?
12:01I think I've cracked it.
12:04We're riding on the wrong side of the road.
12:07How would you like to be?
12:12The star by the saint with tears.
12:16Another three days of paradise with you.
12:21I think I'm in your home.
12:25I think I'm in the wrong side of the road.
12:29Yvette, back off.
12:32Oh, thank you, boy.
12:37Check that door.
12:42Check the window.
12:48Clear.
12:49Didn't anybody see you leave the bar?
12:50No.
12:51Good.
12:55Honey, don't you laugh about us yet?
12:58No. No, we must wait until the war is over.
13:02But the war might go on forever.
13:05No. No, no.
13:07The British will set us free one day.
13:09It may take years, but they will come.
13:13Hello?
13:15Hello?
13:25The British are here.
13:26What?
13:32Well, yes, but it will take more than two before I tell the why.
13:39Are you expecting us by any chance?
13:42What does he say?
13:44I don't know. I don't speak English.
13:47We wish to talk to Monsieur René.
13:54René.
13:55We, we British, come from the sky, shot down.
14:05British, God save our graciously.
14:10I have it, they are the airmen, but they are two days too soon.
14:14You are two days too soon.
14:17What did he say?
14:18I don't know.
14:19Never understood the word of the language.
14:23You?
14:24Huh?
14:25Uh, two days too soon.
14:27Too soon.
14:28Huh?
14:28What's he going on about?
14:30I think he wants your watch before he lets us in.
14:33Oh, sorry, Mark.
14:34Too soon, huh?
14:36Yeah, well, you better give it to him.
14:37He can't stand out here forever.
14:39Grasping French twit.
14:41He left us absolutely stranded at Dunkirk, you know.
14:44We have to give him a watch to get us through the window.
14:46God knows what he'll want before we get food.
14:48Now.
14:52Why has he given me his watch?
14:55Maybe the British are grateful because we fought the Germans while they ran away at Dunkirk.
15:01You had best keep it.
15:02They must be offended.
15:05Oh, he's pocketing the damn thing.
15:08What did I tell you?
15:09I don't want them here.
15:10This place is crawling with Germans.
15:14Well, what am I going to do with them?
15:15We must hide them until we can talk to Michelle.
15:18Hide them?
15:18She says, where am I going to hide them?
15:20What are they talking about?
15:21I don't know.
15:22Perhaps I think you have some way to get your watch.
15:25I don't know about you, but I'm damn peckish.
15:29Me, hungry.
15:36Hungry?
15:37No, no!
15:39What is wrong with him?
15:40I think he has the toothache.
15:43I was thinking he's a poor dentist.
15:46No, no.
15:47No dentist.
15:49That's definite enough.
15:50No food.
15:51Told me you wanted the watch.
15:54Here you are, you mercenary frog.
16:02No, no, no.
16:04No, no, no.
16:11What do you make of that?
16:13Perhaps we're getting sardines.
16:18How can I make them understand we have to hide them?
16:26Leave it to me.
16:39What do you make of that?
16:41I think she wants me to go behind the curtains.
16:45In that case, what are those for?
16:47Maybe she's got a sticky catch on her bra.
16:50Senior officer, I think I should go first.
16:55Oh!
16:57No, it wasn't that.
17:01Ah, Michelle.
17:04These two idiots are here two days too soon.
17:06What am I going to do with them?
17:08You must hide them.
17:10I can't hide them.
17:11I have no time to organise things.
17:13I have not yet prepared the cellar.
17:15Then you must hide them where no one will look.
17:18In the cafe, under the noses of the Germans.
17:20What?
17:21Go and find us a table where we will be alone.
17:23I have a little English.
17:25I will explain.
17:28OK, chaps.
17:29Follow the boss.
17:29Oh, thank God.
17:30She speaks English.
17:33Maria.
17:34These are two British airmen.
17:36I want you to take care of them.
17:38Both of them?
17:39Of course, both of them.
17:41Is it the same time?
17:43But my room is so small.
17:45Find them a table.
17:49Shh, come.
17:55Lily, the messenger has just been.
17:58Monsieur Leclerc de Forger will be here any minute.
18:00What?
18:01Well, how will we recognise him?
18:02He will come to the bar and order a cognac.
18:05He will then ask for a light.
18:07You will say you have no matches.
18:09Then he will reveal himself.
18:12Cognac.
18:13A light.
18:14No matches.
18:15Good, I will stay here in case you arrive.
18:18Should I sing another song?
18:20No.
18:22We're in enough trouble already.
18:34Hans, you see that officer's there?
18:37I do not recognise him.
18:39Perhaps he's on leave from the Russian flood.
18:41That's what they all say.
18:43Watch him.
18:43He could be attached to intelligence.
18:45If he finds out we've been putting a little away for a rainy day,
18:49things could get very difficult for us.
18:51Perhaps we should move the silver and the paintings.
18:53Never mention the silver and the...
19:02Oh, Patron.
19:02May an old man sing a few songs for your customers.
19:07Please.
19:08I am an old soldier.
19:10No money, no pension.
19:13Oh, all right.
19:14One song only, though, and then on your way, eh?
19:17Good evening, Herr Lieutenant.
19:19And what is your pleasure?
19:21I would like a cognac, if you please.
19:23Maria, cognac for the officer, if you would like to.
19:26Why not, why not, why not?
19:50I-I-I expect you would like a light.
19:54Thank you, you're very kind.
19:57I have no matches.
20:03Then why do you ask me if I would like a light?
20:07I'm very sorry.
20:11If you have no matches, take mine.
20:16I have a spare box.
20:18Are you one of them?
20:23Really, it was very lonely on the Russian front.
20:31Where?
20:32A cognac, if you please.
20:34Now be your cognac.
20:54Do you have a light?
20:56Do you have a light for him?
20:58Just lit it.
21:00Oh.
21:01Well, I-I don't want the light.
21:04I just wondered if he had the light.
21:08I have no matches.
21:10Please.
21:11Just giving him some matches.
21:18These are your matches, they're not mine.
21:20You can't.
21:25Is he one of us?
21:26No, he's one of them.
21:28Please, do not tear everybody!
21:35This is Colonel Von Strom, Secretary speaking.
21:39The Colonel is requiring three kilos of butter, two kilos of sugar, ten litres of paraffin and
21:46twenty litres of gasoline.
21:49Yes, you're right.
21:50It was the egg whisk again.
21:58It is not much to look at, Herr Colonel.
22:01Hans, you ignorant peasant.
22:04This is probably the first cuckoo clock ever made.
22:08Absolutely priceless.
22:10This?
22:11This?
22:11This is the fallen Madonna by Van Klomp.
22:14It's a fortune after the war.
22:18Is it wise to have it in your office?
22:19Who will see it apart from Helga?
22:21Come to think of it, it looks a little like Helga.
22:25You too.
22:34Is this the office of Colonel Von Strom?
22:36Yes.
22:38Have you an appointment?
22:42My name is Otto Flick, Gestapo.
22:45Ah, you don't need an appointment.
22:49I will tell the colonel that you're here.
22:51Stop!
22:53Your top button is undone.
22:55Yes, Herr Flick.
22:56Attend to it.
22:57Yes, Herr Flick.
23:05Stop!
23:07Your right stocking is also crooked.
23:08The seam of your left stocking is crooked.
23:13Yes, Herr Flick.
23:22Attend to it.
23:23Yes, Herr Flick.
23:25Your right stocking is also crooked.
23:28Yes, Herr Flick.
23:30Attend to it.
23:32Yes, Herr Flick.
23:46Colonel, a man from the Gestapo is here to see you.
23:50Gestapo?
23:53Did you say, what for?
23:54No, but he notices everything.
23:57Keep him busy for a minute.
24:06In the drawer!
24:08He hands the clock!
24:24Herr Kolonel, Herr Otto Flick.
24:29Heil Hitler.
24:31Heil Hitler!
24:35This is my assistant, Captain Hans Gehring.
24:42He seems very young to be here.
24:45Why is he not at the front?
24:47He has many medical problems.
24:52My orders are directly from Berlin.
24:54From the Führer himself.
24:57The Chateau Fontenac is in your district.
25:00It has come to his attention that in the Fontenac collection
25:03is the Fallen Madonna by Van Klomp.
25:07The Führer would like this for his collection.
25:11But I have bad news.
25:13When I visited the chateau, it had already been taken away.
25:17Along with one or two other valuable pieces.
25:22It is the French.
25:24They pinch everything.
25:26I shall remain in the district until it is found.
25:30You will instigate searches immediately.
25:33Very good, Herr Flick.
25:34You will report progress tomorrow at...
25:37What time shall we say?
25:39...
25:58Very well.
25:59At 5 o'clock tomorrow.
26:02Heil Hitler.
26:07closer closer what's he up to now I don't know think it's our false identity papers
26:22hello hello this is Nighthawk can you hear me can you hear me over of course I can
26:34not you shut up what is the code to tell them that the British Airmen have arrived the little
26:48cupboard is full what what is that the little cupboard is full no no no no I have not used
26:57it
26:57all to die hello hello listen carefully Nighthawk here is your message get the code book the code book
27:10aunt Eloise and her sister will arrive on Thursday over look up aunt Eloise we have no aunt Eloise
27:23this means two airmen two airmen they cannot have this bed they look at Thursday Thursday means
27:32Thursday that's today and we have not got rid of the other two yet they must get a move on
27:39down there
27:39oh no oh no don't don't leave me like this shut up
27:52Mr. Leclerc I have a problem how soon before the papers are finished so I can get rid of these
27:57two
27:57there's the printing the signatures and the steps yeah ten days ten days but I've got another two
28:06women are running any minute I must get rid of these two it's not possible oh my god what's going
28:12on now oh they flap about anything these geezers cannot go stormy's upstairs he's in a panic he wishes to
28:19see you immediately what if he finds these two here we'll all be shut
28:32good god do you know what this means Hitler's upstairs my dear Colonel what can I do for you this
28:45is a
28:45matter of great delicacy you are in possession of German butter sugar paraffin and gasoline for which
28:52you can be shot but you gave them to me your word against mine your word against his however I'm
29:00prepared
29:00to overlook this if you will agree to hide a few little articles and a worthless picture from the
29:05chateau is it the reclining Madonna with the big boobies did you know about this well I told you
29:13where it was in return for these motorcycle the chocolate and the fact that you were going to
29:18shoot me well I have to hide it against a Gestapo are looking for it you will put it in
29:24your cellar
29:26well what if they find it they will shoot you but then what should I hide it because if you
29:31don't
29:32I will have you shot for the butter the sugar the paraffin and the gasoline I will be glad when
29:39this
29:39war is over Maria Yvette take these worthless parcels and put them in the cellar oh my god the British
29:47shaman are here already my old friends wine on the house for my old friends Jack and Pierre the onion
29:56sellers very kind monsieur but my name is Claude this is Alex this is our first visit here but in
30:03that case you can pay for your own wine to make sure it was not too damp for the reclining
30:10Madonna with the
30:11big boobies you better brush up on the Marseillaise I say I've news for you two more British Ammon are
30:26coming here very soon oh good show what are their names do we know them she's gone they don't hang
30:31about do they I say that's a jolly good disguise did you clobber a couple of jetties
30:43what are these Englishmen doing here what how very convenient I've got a nasty feeling he's not
30:53one of us keeping British prisoners then I tell the Gestapo what I have found I will get a middle
31:01for
31:01this and what about the picture I would say you stole it and concealed it but Colonel the Gestapo will
31:08take the picture back to Berlin and then cause your pension I think Rennie has a very good point
31:13there colonel keep some quiet I will deal with the Gestapo have you found the treasure we have just
31:27searched the cellar not a smell of it continue to look I shall not return to Berlin until the picture
31:34is
31:42found
31:46see down sit down wine on the house for my old friends Pierre Emile and Jack and Gilles
31:57there are suddenly in this town many onion sellers it is a festival hair flick every year they gather in
32:07the town to examine each other's onions
32:12they do the dance of the onions and at midnight they have the feast of the onions
32:21they just eat and eat all the onions
32:26sounds very strange to me by three o'clock in the morning it sounds unbelievable
32:45I have just saved your life I am eternally grateful colonel and from now on I give the orders and
32:59you will listen to every word very carefully
33:02and obey every detail anything you say colonel if it will be room six in one hour with the vet's
33:09celery and the flying helmet
33:13and the feather duster
33:15what about the egg whisk no egg whisk
33:20the electric mixer
33:23BECAUSE
33:23you
33:24you
33:24Stop!
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