- 2 days ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:01On the Dukes...
00:02Mail fraud, Miss Tisdale, and let her rip!
00:04The Dukes go all out to keep Miss Tisdale out of jail.
00:08Eat dust, you turkey!
00:09Yeah, hello!
00:12Get the club!
00:14This is a crazy town.
00:22Hang on, Jesse!
00:24Ooh, this is a bit smart.
00:34Just a good old boy.
00:38Never meaning no harm.
00:42Beats all you never saw.
00:44Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born.
00:48Straightening the curves.
00:52Flatening the hills.
00:56Someday the mountain might get them, but the law never will.
01:01Making their way, the only way they know how.
01:08That's just a little bit more than the law will allow.
01:13Just a good old boy.
01:16That wouldn't change if they could.
01:21Fighting the system like a true modern-day Robin Hood.
01:29Hazzard County, where there are certain basics that you can count.
01:33The law of gravity, for instance.
01:35That says that any car that goes up usually comes back down.
01:40The Duke family.
01:41They all know all about him.
01:43And Miss Emma Tisdale.
01:45She delivers the U.S. mail with lots of tender love and care.
01:50In addition to being the postmistress,
01:52Miss Tisdale is also the hottest two-wheeler in town.
01:56Miss Emma Cooks.
02:02She also happens to be awful sweet on Uncle Jesse.
02:05Hi, Jesse.
02:07Hammer, you be careful on that thing.
02:09You're gonna get yourself hurt.
02:11Ma'am, gotta go through.
02:19Miss Tisdale!
02:20Miss Tisdale sure has her hook made it for you, y'all.
02:24Why don't you just give her a little old break
02:25and invite her to that next Grange dance, huh?
02:27Why don't you just keep your eyes on the road?
02:30And if old Bo keeps his eye on the road,
02:32he's gonna see something mighty strange.
02:35Even for Hazzard.
02:46Where'd that phony double white line come from?
02:48What?
02:53Guess who's here?
02:54Lead us.
02:57Dang, dang, dang.
02:59That Grange meat took longer than I thought it would,
03:01and I'm late with my chores now.
03:03Well, that's all I gotta hear, Uncle Jesse.
03:05Y'all hang on.
03:18Yeah!
03:20Yeah!
03:21No!
03:22No!
03:22No!
03:24No!
03:30Clay, this is all wired.
03:33You'll do it, guys.
03:34I think so.
03:35All right, though.
03:48Good morning, Mr. Smith.
03:49Guess you're here to pick up your mail.
03:51Yeah.
03:51That's right.
04:00Another load of mail came in for you this morning.
04:03There you are.
04:04All address to box 16.
04:07Thanks.
04:08Hold it.
04:10Identification, please.
04:12I've been coming in here every morning for a week now.
04:16Regulation.
04:17Sorry.
04:23Okay.
04:24Take a number.
04:25I'm the only one in here.
04:28I know.
04:29Regulations.
04:31Number one.
04:33You're next.
04:35Take her away.
04:37Hey.
04:39You know, you sure got me curious.
04:42All that mail coming in here every day.
04:44What's it for?
04:46Uh-uh-uh.
04:48Regulations.
04:55Regulations can be a nuisance.
04:57But this is one time I think they're gonna pay off.
05:00Miss Tisdale ain't just fast.
05:02She's smart.
05:08And she ain't the only one curious about this fella.
05:11What's he doing hanging around that old sawmill?
05:14All right, come on in, Slocum.
05:15Uh-huh.
05:16It figures.
05:16Anything nefarious and illegal,
05:19old boss hog's gonna have his fat little paws in his summers.
05:22Oh, let's go out of it.
05:25Oh, look at all that.
05:29Let's see.
05:31Oh!
05:31Oh, look at all that.
05:35We're running in luck now.
05:37Luck?
05:38Yeah.
05:38And all them ads in them out of town newspapers.
05:41Like this.
05:42Own a piece of paradise.
05:44Just mail in $100 to P.O. Box 16, Hazard County.
05:48And you will receive a genuine official land gold certificate.
05:53I can read.
05:54Proclaiming your ownership of a beautiful view lot
05:57in the most scenic spot in Dixie,
06:01Hazard Highlands.
06:03There ain't no Hazard Highlands.
06:05Now you just get back to work
06:07stuffing them certificates in them envelopes.
06:09You know them fancy certificates we just printed up.
06:12We want to give them suckers something for their $100.
06:16Go!
06:19All right, Flash.
06:20Now you start licking
06:21and we're gonna lick our way right into 50% of a fortune.
06:26Or is that 50% of 50%?
06:31Meanwhile, Bo and Luke had dropped Jessie and Daisy off at the farm
06:34and they were heading into town using the back route.
06:37Uh-oh.
06:38That looks like the sheriff coming over land.
06:41Look out!
06:51Oh my gosh, are you all right?
06:54I-I didn't mean to cut you off like that.
06:58Oh, I'm awfully sorry.
07:00I-I'm afraid I wasn't really watching where I was driving.
07:03Are you okay?
07:04Yeah, we're fine now.
07:06Nope.
07:07That ain't the sheriff.
07:08Oh, uh, I'm Bo Duke and this is my cousin Luke.
07:11Hi, Sue Ann. Sue Ann Blake.
07:13Pleased to meet you.
07:14Gee, maybe you fellas can help me.
07:16Well, you can just think of us as the, uh,
07:19Hazard County Welcome Wagon.
07:21Well, I've been looking all over for a place called Hazard Highlands
07:25and I haven't had a bit of luck.
07:26Hazard Highlands?
07:27Yep.
07:28I bought a lot there with the most beautiful view you've ever seen.
07:31The view from here is pretty good.
07:32Might have been pretty certificate, but me and Bo have been living here all our lives
07:36and I never heard of no place called Hazard Highlands.
07:38Do you, Bo?
07:39No.
07:40But I'll tell you what, being as we're almost neighbors and all,
07:42I'd be willing to help you find it.
07:44Here, I'll tell you what.
07:44You sit on the other side.
07:45I will drive.
07:46Luke, you stay here and watch the car.
07:47That's fine, really.
07:48Thanks.
07:49But, uh, I think I'll manage.
07:51And I'm sorry again about the accident.
07:53Hey, no problem.
07:55It's all right.
07:56Excuse me.
08:00What?
08:01Back at his hideout,
08:02boss was receiving a phone call that made him lose his appetite.
08:05All right, all right.
08:06Which usually requires something like a war.
08:08I appetite it.
08:09Or bankruptcy.
08:10What's wrong, boss?
08:11Uh, uh, something rotten in your fat burger?
08:12No, fathead.
08:14Something's rotten in the capital city.
08:15Oh.
08:15I just got tipped off that a U.S. Postal Inspector is on his way down here to Hazard
08:22to investigate some kind of mail fraud.
08:25Mm, mm, mm.
08:26Mail fraud?
08:27Hold your tongue.
08:28Please, they're on to us.
08:29Logan, you're gonna have to blow town.
08:32You're the only link between us and that post office bug.
08:34Well, what about that old bat that works down there?
08:36She knows who I am.
08:37Miss Tisdale, that old bat?
08:39Yeah, she knows you.
08:40But she knows you as Mr. John Smith.
08:42Yes.
08:43Yeah, that's why I gave you that ID card with the phony name and address.
08:47You see, I told you the boss is always thinking.
08:50Listen, that U.S. Postal Inspector fellow ain't gonna rest happy until he nails somebody,
08:55right?
08:55Right.
08:56Well, what if he made it look like this whole operation was being run by none other than the aforesaid...
09:06Miss Tisdale!
09:06You got it!
09:08Don't you got it!
09:10Listen, we were gonna pin it on Miss Tisdale.
09:11Yeah, don't say it out loud.
09:13All right, Slocum.
09:14Get on your way and don't show your face around here again.
09:16Hear me?
09:16Get on there.
09:17Get out of here, Slocum.
09:19I got my appetite back again.
09:22Oh, so have I.
09:23No!
09:23You ain't got time to eat.
09:24No, you're on your way to the post office.
09:27And when Miss Tisdale ain't looking, you're gonna plant this here incriminating evidence all over the place.
09:43You stay here and watch the meaty.
09:46You stay here and watch the meaty.
10:01Sheriff, am I glad to see you.
10:03I'd be mighty appreciative if you wouldn't mind the place.
10:05I gotta run over to Cooters with Miss Sickle.
10:08Over to Cooters?
10:09Well, I don't know if I can eat...
10:11Hey!
10:11Oh!
10:12Hey, what?
10:12I'm due for my thousand-mile checkup.
10:14Yeah.
10:15So be sure you get the IDs and make them take a number.
10:17Well, I'll let it...
10:20Quick, little devil.
10:23Well, this is gonna be easier than falling off a boss home's wallet.
10:27Quick, little devil.
10:31Let's see now.
10:33Quick, little devil.
10:39And I'll put you right in here.
10:41And then...
10:42Go, go, go, go gouging me.
10:44Ooh.
10:46Sheriff, you're just the man I've been looking for.
10:48I am?
10:48Yeah, you are.
10:51Would you mind taking a number, please?
10:53My name is Blake, U.S. Postal Inspector.
10:56Oh, that's pretty.
10:57I'm investigating a possible mail fraud involving a phony land development called Hazard Highlands.
11:02Did you ever hear of it?
11:03Hazard...
11:05Hazard...
11:05No.
11:06Yes.
11:07Of course not, lady.
11:08Are you kidding me here?
11:09Well, where's the postal mistress, Miss Emma Tisdale?
11:11Well, I don't know.
11:12She just...
11:13She went out for a little bit.
11:15Listen.
11:16I don't want to tell anybody else this, but you know that she has been acting awful suspicious lately.
11:20I mean, that is one of the reasons I'm in here, see.
11:23I'm doing a little bit of investigating on my own.
11:25In fact, I'm just looking around here right at this moment when you came in and gouged me.
11:30Oh, oh.
11:31Look here, what I done found.
11:33Mm-mm.
11:34Mm-mm.
11:35Mm-mm.
11:36What is that?
11:37It's...
11:38Oh.
11:41Hazard Highlands.
11:42Wait.
11:42You got one.
11:44Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm
11:46-mm-mm.
11:48You see what I see?
11:50Oh, yeah.
11:51That car belongs to that little sweetheart who gave you the brush off.
11:54First, you don't succeed.
12:05Howdy.
12:07In here.
12:08More Hazard Highlands.
12:09Yep.
12:10Look.
12:11Here's a mailing list.
12:13Well, see, now, doesn't that put the cow in the barn?
12:15That definitely proves Miss Tisdale is guilty.
12:18Guilty of what?
12:19I'll have to ask you not to interfere.
12:21This is an official investigation.
12:23That's right.
12:24She's an official government postal inspector.
12:26See, Miss Tisdale, she is guilty of mail fraud.
12:29And this is all the evidence we need.
12:31Mail fraud? Miss Tisdale?
12:32The only thing she's guilty of is having a yin for Uncle Jesse.
12:35Get on out of here before I cuff you and stuff you for interfering with official business.
12:40Just get on!
12:42We'll leave anyway.
12:43Come on, we're gone.
12:45And they just, they come in here just to gall my soul.
12:50I swear Boss Hog's got to be involved in this.
12:53We better tip off Miss Tisdale.
12:54You know, I think I saw her going over towards Cooters.
12:56Let's check it out.
12:57All right.
13:01Friends and neighbors, you're about to meet a member of Hazard's oldest and only Chinese family.
13:06The Phongs.
13:08Everybody loves Billy Joe and his sister Scarlett.
13:11Well, hush my puppies if it ain't them good old Duke boys.
13:15How y'all doing?
13:15Hey Billy Joe.
13:17I moved it over here to borrow Cooters torch.
13:19Got me a little welding doing my, my walk here.
13:22All right.
13:23How y'all doing?
13:24Woo!
13:25Take a look at that.
13:26Miss Tisdale, while I'm fixing up your motorcycle, you can use this one here for a longer.
13:30Well, I hope this doohickey don't cut down on my speed.
13:33You know how I like to let her rip.
13:35Uh, Miss Tisdale.
13:36Now, there's a U.S. Postal Inspector over at your post office.
13:39It looks like her and Roscoe are fixing to accuse you of mail fraud.
13:42Mail fraud?
13:43Me?
13:44You.
13:45They gotta be sucking out of a bent straw.
13:47Well, that's kind of what we figured, Miss Tisdale.
13:50That frosts me.
13:51I'm gonna tool over there and straighten them out.
13:53Uh, just hold on a second.
13:54Now, it looks like some sort of setup.
13:57So we figured, uh, you better lay low and...
13:59You can even come out and hide out at our farm.
14:01Hide out? Me?
14:02No way, Jose.
14:04Did you say your farm?
14:06Yes, ma'am.
14:08With your Uncle Jesse?
14:10He's there most of the time.
14:12Woo!
14:12Here, y'all.
14:13Roscoe's coming out of the post office.
14:15Ah, shoot.
14:16Uh, Miss Tisdale, why don't you get in the back of the General Lee?
14:18Yeah, come on.
14:19Here, give me those.
14:20Yeah, now, just hold on a second.
14:22Oh, just a second.
14:23I got me an idea.
14:24There you go, sweetheart.
14:25Okay, ready?
14:26Go!
14:28Get in there.
14:29Billy Joe, you are the closest to Miss Tisdale's size.
14:32Yeah.
14:32You're gonna have to give us a big favor here, all right?
14:34I tell you, got it, good buddy.
14:36Let me show this, Joe.
14:38Here's my dude.
14:39Just gonna fit you.
14:40Okay.
14:41She said she was headed over towards Cooter's garage over there.
14:45In fact, there she is right now.
14:47All righty, looking good.
14:48She's getting on.
14:49She's getting on her motorcycle.
14:52Hey, don't get fresh.
14:55All right, Miss Tisdale.
14:58I see you, you little sneak.
15:00All right, come on.
15:01Get out of here now.
15:02Go on.
15:02Hot pursuit.
15:03Go on.
15:05Get out of here.
15:09Joel!
15:12Go on.
15:17Go on.
15:19Get out of here.
15:21Get out of here.
15:22Get out of here.
15:23Yeah, get out of here.
15:24Go on.
15:26I forgot to ask him if he could drive that thing.
15:29Give me a go.
15:29You helen.
15:30on. I'm going to go and look up that word
15:32walk to see what that fellow was welding
15:34on.
15:37Yoo-hoo!
15:39Hey!
15:42Hey!
15:43Hey!
15:44Hey!
15:48What's going on?
15:52Look, Miss Tidale, everything's cool now.
15:54Stay low. Get down.
15:56So we catch on the flip side?
15:58Yeah.
16:04Crazy, man.
16:05I never noticed.
16:13Not now, Flash.
16:14We're in hot pursuit.
16:16We'll catch that female Dillinger.
16:18Good.
16:20Inspector, you haven't met Flash, have you?
16:23Inspector, this is Flash.
16:24Flash, this is Inspector.
16:25Officer Coltrane, do you always have this dog riding with you?
16:28Well, I didn't used to. See, Cletus used to.
16:30But she has a higher IQ, you see.
16:33And you should say hello to Inspector.
16:34Look out!
16:36Oh!
16:38Oh!
16:40Oh!
16:43Oh!
16:44Oh!
16:44Oh!
16:44Oh!
16:45Oh!
16:46Oh!
16:49Oh!
16:50That's the nail on the frying pan, and the end of the fire must have been invented for
16:53the Duke boys.
16:54Yep.
16:55That's Cletus.
17:02He, he, he, he!
17:08Put the pedal to the middle
17:11Let's go
17:13Miss Tisbell, stay down now
17:15I am, I am
17:32Now friends, you're about to witness a homily
17:35Just cause things go bad, watch your mouth
17:39Or they'll get worse
17:46Well, I hope Cletus has got his drip dye uniform on
17:49He ain't gonna need his 24-hour deodorant
17:51He keeps shaking showers like this
17:54Ever see a man look like he'd bit into an apple
17:56And found half a worm
17:58And didn't want to let on none
18:00Well, that's old Uncle Jesse's predicament
18:02Well, Jesse, he's a gentleman
18:03And right off, he did his best to make Miss Tisdale feel real welcome
18:07Daisy
18:07Uh, Emmer, I want you to know that our house is your house
18:11And you're sure welcome
18:12Oh, that's so sweet of you, Jesse
18:15And thank you, Daisy
18:16Sure
18:17Don't you worry about a thing, Miss Tisdale
18:18We're gonna find out who's trying to pin that phony land deal on you
18:21And, and if my suspicions are right
18:23I got a feeling his initials are gonna turn out to be J.D. Hogg
18:27What else is new?
18:32Hey, y'all, Billy Joe, made it
18:34Listen, Billy Joe, stash that cycle up there in the barn
18:36Luke and me give you a ride back to town, okay?
18:38Y'all got it, good buddy
18:40Get in there, low-pop
18:41Right there
18:42Hey, Lila
18:45Need some piece of work
18:47Listen, we better head back into town
18:48Find that gal postal inspector
18:50And try and talk some sense into her
18:51Alrighty
18:51And make sure that she's running my post office in a fit manner
18:55Don't worry about it, Miss Tisdale, okay?
18:57Just, uh, make yourself to home
18:58Yeah, don't worry
18:59Uncle Jesse here's gonna take good care of you, Miss Tisdale
19:03I'll see y'all
19:05You know, Jesse
19:06I'm just dying to see your room
19:09Uh, yeah
19:11Uh
19:14Oh, look at that
19:15A big bowl full of popcorn
19:16Yummy, yummy
19:17You know something?
19:18I never would have guessed that a U.S. postal inspector turned out to be female
19:23Isn't that nice?
19:25You know, help fuck that, will you?
19:27You know something?
19:29Like you say
19:29Uh, everybody knows that Miss Tisdale has never been in trouble with the law
19:33But everybody also knows she's a little bit squirrely
19:36I mean, riding around on a motorcycle at her age
19:39And doing wheelies
19:41There's no telling what she might be capable of
19:43She's crazy as a coop
19:45Mr. Hogg
19:46I seriously doubt that Miss Tisdale is capable of operating this entire mail fraud operation all by herself
19:54You do?
19:55Well, there has to be others involved, don't you agree?
19:58Others?
19:59Others
19:59What others?
20:00What others?
20:01Oh, I don't know, but I intend to do some investigating and find out
20:06Oh, no
20:06No, no
20:07Can you call me if you hear anything?
20:09Yes, you know
20:09Now, wait a minute, don't go into the end of the year
20:11Now, wait a minute, don't go into the end of the year
20:13Listen, you can't come back for lunch
20:15Oh, man, it's so good in here
20:18Oh, no, no, no
20:20Turn this thing off
20:21Here, turn it off
20:23I mean, this never hit
20:24I broke it
20:26I broke the thing
20:29Turn it off
20:30Turn it off, turn it off, will you
20:32Turn it off
20:34Where is it?
20:35Where is it?
20:36Get the car, will you?
20:38Get the car, get the car, get the car, get the car, get the car, get the car for it
20:43Turn it off
20:43Whoa
20:45Whoa
20:48Oh
20:49Hello
20:50Hey, Suanne, we gotta talk to you
20:53I don't care what kind of evidence Roscoe's got,
20:56there is no way that Ms. Tisdale could have dreamed up this Hazard Highland scheme.
20:59No, so what we figured you should do is go talk to this John Smith fella.
21:02He's the guy that's been picking up all the packages at Ms. Tisdale's.
21:05Now, with a name like John Smith, he's got to be using a phony ID.
21:08Tell me, just how do you happen to know who's picking up the mail?
21:11And when exactly were you talking to Ms. Tisdale?
21:14Sue Ann, Ms. Tisdale is a friend of the family.
21:17And we know the situation here in the county.
21:19Now, isn't there any way that we can work with you on this thing?
21:21I insist that both of you stay out of this.
21:24I trust I've made myself perfectly clear.
21:27Good day, gentlemen.
21:30Oh, my, looky, looky, looky. Do you see what I see?
21:33Listen, if that female inspector is so sure
21:36that someone else is in on that mail fraud with Ms. Tisdale,
21:40let's just accommodate her.
21:43Accommodate her.
21:44The only decent lead we got is this John Smith fella.
21:47Let's go home and have us a talk with Ms. Tisdale.
21:52Now, Roscoe, what?
21:53Like I said, you take this here incriminating evidence.
21:57Yeah.
21:57All right, you get yourself over to the Duke farm
21:59and you just plant that all over the place.
22:02Oh, yeah.
22:02And then when you're finished,
22:04you call in and I'll come running with an inspector gal
22:07and then we'll catch the whole caboodle.
22:09The whole caboodle.
22:11All right, get moving.
22:13All right.
22:14First, I'm going to plug this in
22:16and have myself a snack.
22:18Oh, Roscoe, I'll pop you.
22:21No, don't do that.
22:22Get it off of me.
22:25What did you do that for?
22:26Where's the floor?
22:28Where's the floor?
22:28Turn it off.
22:29Let's do it off of you.
22:47Find out anything?
22:48Well, we didn't find out a whole heck of a lot,
22:50but we did get a Capital City Gazette.
22:51I believe if you'll look in Section 2,
22:53you'll see an ad for Hazard Highlands Lots.
22:56Yeah, I'm going to give Scoop a call,
22:57see if you can help fill us in.
22:58Okay.
23:05Yeah, Mabel.
23:06Look at that.
23:07Give me Scoop Whitman over at the Capital City Gazette, please.
23:25That's Ms. Tisdale's.
23:27That's...
23:40Boss, this is here for a Scoopy Coltrane.
23:43All conditions are go.
23:45I'll meet you at Old Mill Crossroads.
23:47I'm going.
23:55Come on, Peter.
23:56I got it.
23:56Where is the house?
23:57There you are.
23:58Yeah.
23:58Come on, my sheriff found it.
23:59Just like I throw you in.
24:01Where is he?
24:01Get in here.
24:02Well, we got to...
24:03No, no, that's you.
24:04Get in there.
24:04I'm alive.
24:05There you are.
24:06Get in there, sir.
24:06Come on, we're going after the phone.
24:09Later.
24:09No!
24:12Well, thanks a lot, Scoop.
24:15Really appreciate it.
24:17Dang it.
24:18What's the matter?
24:18John Smith again.
24:20Well, they got anything on him?
24:21The gal who took the ad said that she can't remember what he looks like, and he paid cash.
24:25No receipt, no check, no nothing.
24:27Now, if all them suckers are paying a hundred bucks a shot, that fella's got to be loaded
24:31with cash.
24:32And if J.D.'s involved, he sure is a-laying low.
24:36All right, there's Roscoe.
24:37Now, pull up, pull up to him.
24:38Hey, what'd you find out?
24:39Oh, good news, good news.
24:42Mr. Tisdale, she's hiding out on the Duke farm.
24:44Oh, Mr. Tisdale, Duke farm.
24:45Oh, good, good, good.
24:47All right, now, Inspector Blink, I'm going to show you how the law and hazard operate.
24:51Watch this, you're going to learn.
24:52Now, now, men, men, we're going to use the flanking movement.
24:56Which one is that?
24:57We're going to spray it out, and then we're going to sneak up on them from both sides.
25:01You got that?
25:02Oh, yeah, and then squeeze.
25:04Yeah, that's it.
25:05All right, go on, move it, Roscoe, move it.
25:06And remember, maintain the radio silence.
25:08Right.
25:08Turn off the CB, keep it off.
25:10Right.
25:10All right, come on, what you waiting for?
25:11Let's go.
25:12Yes, sir.
25:13Roscoe, come on, come on, let's go.
25:14Come on, now.
25:15Where are we, Frank?
25:16Oh, he's going to go that way.
25:17We're going this way.
25:18All right.
25:18He's going that way.
25:19Yeah, come on over this way.
25:23Please, you sure you got your CB turned off?
25:26Positive, Cousin Boss, there's a little button right here.
25:28Oh, ah!
25:30You're not going to push the wrong button.
25:31Let's stop.
25:33Uh-oh.
25:34Oh, y'all, it's a raid.
25:35P-brain Coltrane must have figured out Miss Tisdale's here.
25:38Listen, Uncle Jesse, Daisy would take the Jeep, me and Bo take the General.
25:41We'd do some culvert for you.
25:43You take Miss Tisdale, make a run for it.
25:44All right, let's go.
25:45Let's go.
25:46Get out of here.
25:47Geronimo!
25:48Well, let's just get with it.
25:50Come on, this is the part I love best.
25:53Get out of here, Amber, we'll take my trap.
25:55No, let's take my motorcycle.
25:57It's faster.
26:11Now, are you sure you know how to run this thing?
26:15Jesse, get in and don't forget to put on your hard hat because I ain't moving until you do.
26:20Well, I'll put it there.
26:23Now, hang on, Jesse.
26:24Here we go.
26:29It's all right as long as this thing is on.
26:32Roscoe, Roscoe, they're running for it.
26:34Get after them.
26:34Get here, get after them.
26:38Here we go.
26:41Hang on, Jesse, hang on.
26:42You just keep your hands on those pedal bars.
26:47Hey, Luke.
26:48Trouble up ahead.
26:49Watch your things change now.
26:52Get away, Bo.
26:54Well, Bo and Luke are the first line of defense.
26:57What you reckon they'll do?
27:01Get it!
27:01Out of the way!
27:02Oh, don't!
27:03Hit him!
27:03Hey, hey!
27:05Good job!
27:06Good job!
27:07Look out!
27:08Oh!
27:10Oh!
27:11Oh!
27:11Oh!
27:13Oh, no, you don't, Clayton.
27:15Oh, you're going right out of here!
27:19That's Daisy.
27:20Not bad for a girl, huh?
27:22Oh!
27:23Oh, dude!
27:24Oh, oh, oh.
27:25That was a killed, the unordinary man.
27:27I tell you, I made a steal.
27:29Clayton, you're going to get us out of here.
27:32Let's ride it back.
27:33Come on, that's it.
27:34Come on.
27:34Get that to the parcel.
27:35Come on, move it back.
27:37Hey, hey, hey, come on.
27:39Oh, no, no, no.
27:41Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
27:41Eat this one, Daisy!
27:44Go, Miss Tisdale, go!
27:46Yee-haw!
27:48Eat dust, you turkeys!
27:49You keep your eye on the rope, woman!
27:52All right, for you, let's go!
27:54All right, for you, let's go!
27:55Let's go!
27:58Let's go!
27:59Let's go!
28:05You know, that girl's getting herself an education.
28:08You're all wet!
28:10After they got through congratulating themselves on their escape, Miss Tisdale and the Dukes
28:14realized that they were all fugitives now.
28:17And with a U.S. mail involved, that made it a federal rap.
28:21I feel just awful about getting you nice folks in this mess.
28:24You all can go to jail just for helping me.
28:28Oh, Amber, don't worry about it.
28:29What are friends for?
28:31No, besides, we'll get you out of this mess as soon as we can figure out a place we can
28:33all hide out.
28:34Well, Cooters is out.
28:35Everybody look for us there.
28:36Billy Joe Farns.
28:38Look, he already offered to help, and he's got that storeroom right behind his CV shop.
28:41You got it.
28:42That's a good idea.
28:43Yeah, let's hit it.
28:45Uh, Amber, it's been fun and all, but I think I'm gonna ride with the boys.
28:49Keep your helmet on, Jesse.
28:51We're blasting off.
28:54Sweet, sweet.
28:55Will you hold it just out there?
29:05And so, the hole in the barn gang stashed their vehicles and came sneaking into town.
29:11And the boys were right.
29:12Billy Joe Farns was thrilled to put them up.
29:15Yes, sir, Reebok.
29:17There ain't nothing like good old southern hospitality.
29:20Y'all make yourselves to home now, here.
29:22Yeah, set yourselves down a spell, and I'll whoop you up a fine dinner.
29:27Southern fried wonton, sweet and sour hog jaws, and chitlin chow men.
29:33And you ain't lived till you try to eat grits with chopsticks.
29:37Well, that's real kind to you, Billy Joe, but we got a little cooking of our own to do.
29:40Yeah, see, we ain't yet hooked that John Smith fella up to Boss Hog.
29:43Let's go get that sucker!
29:44Now, just hold your horses a second, Mrs. Tisdale.
29:46Now, what with Roscoe Farns, ain't no telling what's gonna happen.
29:50You'd be a lot better off staying here.
29:51Yeah, you'd be safer here.
29:53Well, if you say so, but I'm too nervous to stay alone.
29:58You know, you might have hit on something there.
30:01Uncle Jesse, you can run the whole operation from here over to Seabee.
30:04We'll see you later, boys.
30:06Daisy?
30:07Uncle Jesse thinks it'd be nice and cozy for y'all here.
30:11Well, hurry back, yeah?
30:13All right, go on, go on.
30:14Go on, go on, go on.
30:16Go on, go on, go on.
30:18Hold it, hold it.
30:19All right.
30:24Well, gentlemen, you have shown me how the law and hazard operates all right.
30:29That was without a doubt the most ludicrous, outrageous, asinine police operation I have ever seen.
30:36You enjoy hot pursuit, huh?
30:39Thank you very much, ma'am.
30:40We try to please.
30:41Oh, Cletus, you were born stupid and you've been losing ground ever since.
30:45Gentlemen, if you want me, I will be in the post office.
30:48Yeah, all right then, all right.
30:49Just driving with you.
30:50Cletus, will you just hush your dipstick?
30:53Boss, it's all his fault anyway.
30:54Oh, dipstick, huh?
30:55Well, I have you know dipsticks are rich, because they're in oil.
30:58Oh, just hush up, hush up both of you.
31:02I mean, you're a disgrace to the uniform, you know that?
31:05You'll go get cleaned up.
31:07And then, both of you, go round up the duke gang.
31:09Listen, don't worry about it.
31:10We'll cover all the crossroads.
31:12Yeah, well, as for me, I'm bringing in reinforcements of my own.
31:15Oh, you are?
31:16Reinforcements?
31:17Did you say reinforcements?
31:18Yeah, I'm calling Slocum to come here with some muscle.
31:20Oh, of course, when that mail sack's full of money for Hazard Highlands arrive at the post office tomorrow morning
31:26at 8,
31:27I aim to make it a very special delivery.
31:31Oh, special delivery, I love it.
31:33Go, go, ooh, ooh.
31:37Unaware that Boss was bringing in reinforcements,
31:40the duke dragnet spread out high and low,
31:42trying to find Boss's hideout without getting caught themselves.
31:46Daisy went to the old Indian caves.
31:48Moe and Luke scouted Boss's old steel sites.
31:51There's nothing but snipes and cobwebs here at the old Indian caves.
31:54Yeah, there's no luck up here at old Boss Hog's steel site.
31:58Oh, dang, I was hoping you'd find them there.
32:02Well, you better go on to the old coffin works.
32:05Will you stop that?
32:07Stop what?
32:08Oh, not you, not you.
32:10Just, just get going.
32:13Well, as you can see,
32:14the searching party wasn't having any more luck than Miss Tisday.
32:17But Roscoe and Cletus must have stepped in a mess of four-leaf clovers.
32:21Out hunting for them dukes,
32:23they got luckier than a rabbit with six feet.
32:28Please?
32:30There they are.
32:31All right, let's bust the road.
32:33Go, this is the best part.
32:38We've got us a roadblock up ahead.
32:40Hang on.
32:52Well, it looks like Cletus ain't gonna need that sunny bath for another couple of months.
32:56Cletus, get in there and knock that vehicle out of there.
32:59I'm serious now.
33:01I'm sick of you.
33:03Cletus!
33:04Cletus!
33:05I can...
33:05Y'all should have seen old Cletus in the gym class.
33:09So, when the dawn broke over hazard like thunder,
33:12the hunt continued for the hog hideout.
33:16And Boss's reinforcements were right on schedule.
33:19Now, didn't Miss Tisdale say that that John Smith fellow was driving a blue sedan?
33:23Yeah.
33:24Let's go get him.
33:25All right.
33:25Let's go get him.
34:00You're walking, too.
34:01You know it.
34:09That wheel truck always arrives at the Hazard Post Office at 8 a.m. sharp.
34:13Well, we'll be there.
34:14That's right.
34:15Yeah, the only thing wrong is you boys sure can't show your faces around here.
34:19Now, we've got all that covered.
34:21Perfect.
34:22Hey, you boys think of everything, don't you?
34:24All right.
34:25Now, after you boys grab their mail bags, here's what we're going to do.
34:37You're somebody else.
34:39Shit, can I die?
34:40Quick, quick, quick.
34:41Put your ass cool.
34:42Don't let him, just you.
35:05I think we're about to have a hazard confrontation, two on two.
35:14Hey!
35:19Come on, we got a gun.
35:28Easy, what do you guys got against us anyway?
35:30Can we talk this over?
35:34Bad news, bad news.
35:35What a lousy time for those Duke boys to show up, right?
35:38Wrong.
35:39Yeah, this couldn't have been better if I had wasted from the tooth theory.
35:43Are you kidding me? Why would you wish that in the tooth theory?
35:46Will you just wait, watch and learn?
35:59All right, good work boys, good work.
36:02Now, this turn of events means we're gonna change our plans a little bit.
36:06We ain't gonna forget the heist.
36:07No siree, Bob, not on your life.
36:10What we're gonna do is, we're gonna be able to pin this old stick up on the Duke boys.
36:18Hey, Nelson, you go in there and grab one of their wallets.
36:22I got it, we're gonna drop it when we make the hit.
36:25Yeah, you got it, all right.
36:31What are you doing?
36:39You got it?
36:40Here you go.
36:41Oh, good.
36:43That's right.
36:44Well, we won't be needing this no more.
36:46Yeah.
36:47All right, here you are.
36:49Voodoo.
36:50Voodoo.
36:50Now, make sure you accidentally drop that thing during the grip.
36:54Yeah.
36:54Right.
36:55Mm-hmm.
36:56All right, now, come on.
36:58Let's go see if we can find that orange clunker collar there.
37:00Uh, we just gotta give it a tune down.
37:04You know what I mean?
37:05Tune down.
37:16Tune down.
37:17And start pulling.
37:18Go on.
37:19Get everything out of there.
37:20Just rip it out of there.
37:22That's it.
37:23I don't want nothing to work in this thing.
37:25Now, that's like assaulting a member of the family.
37:29I already got stirred.
37:31Give me that.
37:32Give me that.
37:32Be careful.
37:33I trust me.
37:34Well, that takes care of that clunker collar.
37:37All right, now, skid and beat.
37:38Come on, let's get a move on.
37:39It's time to play pool stuff.
37:47You ever think about shopping this thing?
37:49Oh, my God.
37:49There you go.
37:50Well, here.
37:51Let me do that.
37:52All right.
37:56Right back to town.
38:01Time!
38:02Good job!
38:04Yeah.
38:05What do you suppose they took my wallet for?
38:08It ain't got three bucks in it.
38:09Yeah, but it also had your ID in it.
38:12Didn't it ever occur to you they might be setting us up for something?
38:15Well, we still ain't figured a way to pin Boss Hogg in with this whole mess.
38:19Not until now, we ain't.
38:22Does that look familiar?
38:25Whew!
38:26Well, wait a minute. It can't be more than eight o'clock.
38:27What's Boss Hogg doing floating around here that early?
38:29Eight o'clock, Bo. We're slowing down.
38:32What's eight o'clock got to do with that?
38:33Eight o'clock is when the mail's delivered to the post office.
38:36Now, somebody's got to go around in there and pick up all them bags of hundred dollar bills, don't they?
38:39That's right. Let's get out of here.
38:43Now, when Boss gets up early, it means trouble for everybody.
38:48This time, it's the U.S. mail.
38:50Aw, would you look at that!
38:52Those dirty crooks done wrecked the general.
38:54They tore this engine clean apart.
38:57Yeah.
38:59That window.
39:01Here's the spark wire and distributor.
39:04The air cleaner here.
39:05There's a couple more wires over here.
39:06Let's see if we can find all the parts and stick them back together again.
39:09All right.
39:10All right.
39:11Here's another wire.
39:13Look, I'll start at this.
39:14You keep looking.
39:15And four.
39:18You got that Duke fellas wallet?
39:20Yep.
39:21All right.
39:21All ready for the drop.
39:36Morning.
39:378 AM.
39:37Right on time.
39:39Ah.
39:41I'll get it.
39:47All right, sugar.
39:48I'll take that.
39:49Now, wait a minute.
39:50This is the U.S. mail.
39:51Cool it, honey, and you won't get hurt.
40:17Oh, see, we seen it.
40:19Yeah, we seen him rob the mill.
40:21Yeah, we saw the whole pea-picking thing.
40:23One of them dropped this wallet.
40:25Belongs to Bo Duke.
40:26See, I knew it.
40:27I knew it was those Duke boys.
40:29Look at that.
40:29It is Bo Duke.
40:30Oh, my.
40:31Oh, well, don't you worry, Inspector Blake.
40:33We'll catch them Steven Duke.
40:34Come on, Sierra.
40:35We're gone.
40:36Come on.
40:38And she thought it was going to be easy when she left Atlanta.
40:43All right, say your prayers and turn it over.
40:46Hey, we did it.
40:57Hey, nabbit.
40:59Wouldn't you think them boys would call in?
41:08You know everything's working out just perfect now.
41:11Oh, goodness.
41:12Now, as soon as we get back to the hideout, I'll take over them meal bags, pay off them two
41:17stooges, and send them on their way.
41:19On their way?
41:20And then I'll arrest the Duke boys for stealing their U.S. mail.
41:23Yeah.
41:24And then they're just sure going to be shipped off to the federal pen.
41:28They ship them off.
41:29Deputy Cleans calling Sheriff.
41:31Deputy Cleans calling Sheriff.
41:32Duke boys just robbed the post office.
41:33Come on, Sheriff.
41:34Held up the post office.
41:36The boys wouldn't do something like that.
41:39What in tarnation going on out there?
41:41There's only one way to find out.
41:42Let's get cracked.
41:44Looks like Jesse's in more trouble than Bo and Luke.
41:46Deputy Cleans calling Sheriff.
41:46Right, go call the train.
41:47Luke, you're so right about that frame up.
41:50Well, now we've got to catch him, fellas.
41:51Come on.
41:52Duke boys just robbed the post office.
41:54Come on, Sheriff.
41:55Oh, why don't you tell me what to do?
41:56I don't know what to do.
41:58Duke boys just robbed the post office, man.
41:59We better take off after.
42:00You drive with me?
42:01He's not on your leg.
42:08Look out, Cleans.
42:12You know, it's a wonder old Cleans don't grow gills.
42:15I've got to get a wetsuit.
42:18Now then, here we go.
42:20Now, first off, the bad boys were heading back to the hideout to divvy up the money with
42:25old boss and Roscoe.
42:30And the poster man, bless her little old heart, was trying to stop all this.
42:36And Jesse was facing a true test of manhood, riding with Miss Tuesday, again.
42:45And Laura and Luke, who just got free, were heading back to town when...
42:51That's him.
42:55That's him.
43:02The Duke boys, step on it.
43:04Now we got everybody going in the same direction.
43:07Ain't that slick?
43:16Careful now.
43:22All right.
43:24Boy, just pull it over.
43:25This is all right.
43:27Ain't it here?
43:28You're screaming out the window.
43:29Pull it up.
43:30They can't get eaten.
43:32Oh.
43:32Pull it over now.
43:33I'm serious now.
43:34What?
43:35All right.
43:36All right.
43:36Now, after him.
43:37After him.
43:47That's a showing him, Roscoe.
43:53They just parked.
43:55They just parked.
43:56They just parked.
43:57They just parked.
43:57They just parked.
43:57They just parked.
43:58They just parked.
43:58Slow down now.
43:59It's smoky.
44:04Now, let's just watch it, Ember.
44:07What's that?
44:08It's our post office lady.
44:10She's loony.
44:12Hang on, Jesse.
44:13What do you think I'm doing?
44:15No.
44:16Yeah.
44:17No.
44:20Whoa.
44:21You are like.
44:25Ember.
44:27Boy, I've seen it, but I do not believe it.
44:37All right.
44:38All right.
44:39Come on, Ember.
44:39Roscoe.
44:40All right.
44:40You just grab that new force.
44:42And the rest of them in charge of me and thrown in robbery.
44:44I got the evidence right here.
44:45Now grab the mailbag.
44:46I got the evidence right here.
44:48Hold on a second, boss.
44:50You found us a piece of evidence over at your hideout site.
44:53I think it'd be mighty incriminating in court.
44:55Well, where did you find me?
44:56Where's your guard?
44:57What's going on here?
44:59Who, Inspector Bleak?
45:00See, we found them dangerous criminals, didn't we?
45:03Roscoe, you cover them and stuff them, will you?
45:05And as quick as you could say double-cross, old boss did a switch.
45:09He not only turned old Slocum and his pal in as the two masked crooks that framed the
45:13dukes, but he laid off that mail fraud on them, too.
45:17A hundred dollars.
45:18And in return, Bo and Luke agreed not to blow the whistle on old boss if he sent all the
45:23money back to the people he built in his mail scam.
45:25Give another hundred dollars.
45:27And as for Miss Tisdale, not only did she receive a commendation, but Jesse admired her
45:33gumption so much that he finally broke down and invited her to go out catfishing with
45:38him.
45:38And it wasn't even fishing season in Hazard County.
45:41I know I care a lot, Jesse, but you've made me feel sexy again.
45:47I sure do like happy endings.
45:49Don't everybody?
45:59Bye.
46:00Bye.
46:10Bye.
46:28YouTube.
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