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00:05Harry, put down those coupons.
00:08Eddie and Laura finally gave me that language tape they've been promising us.
00:11Great, we're going to be a bilingual family.
00:17Daddy Mac, a good-looking guy.
00:23Daddy Mac, a good-looking guy.
00:27Fly, honey, a good-looking girl.
00:32Fly, honey, a good-looking girl.
00:38Yo, let's kick it with the homies.
00:41Hey, let's relax with our friends.
00:48You know, this is amazing.
00:50This is a whole different language.
00:52Yep, and when we learn it, we'll be able to talk with our kids.
00:58Ready for more fly, honey?
01:00Let's kick it, Daddy Mac.
01:13It's a rare condition, this day and age,
01:17to read any good news on the newspaper page.
01:21And love and tradition of the grand design,
01:24some people say it's even harder to find.
01:27Well, then, there must be some magic crew
01:32inside these gentle walls.
01:36Cause all I see is a tower of dreams,
01:40real love bursting out of every scene.
01:45Days go by,
01:48it's the bigger love of the family.
02:08Uncle Carl.
02:10I was thinking about it.
02:13Uncle Carl?
02:14I was thinking about it.
02:17Uncle Carl!
02:26Oh, Richie!
02:33Morning, Uncle Carl.
02:34You knocked the wind out of me.
02:36Sorry.
02:37I had to wake you up,
02:38cause I made you breakfast in bed.
02:41Oh.
02:42Well, that's very thoughtful.
02:44Hey, it's the least I can do
02:46for the best uncle in the entire whole universe.
02:50Wow.
02:50Here, fresh orange juice.
02:52I squeezed it myself.
03:01What's the matter?
03:02Did you get it, Pitt?
03:03Mm.
03:05Just...
03:07One.
03:12Two.
03:14Look, I made you eggs, toast, and oatmeal.
03:19You're after something, young man, aren't you?
03:25See, there's this hot new video game
03:27called Super Space Donkeys.
03:29I need that game, Uncle Carl.
03:33Well, have you asked your mother for it?
03:36Nah, she's hip to the old breakfast in bed trick.
03:40Well, okay.
03:41I'll have a talk with her
03:43and see how she feels
03:44about that particular video game, okay?
03:46Thanks, Uncle Carl.
03:49Mm.
03:50Ow!
03:51What's the matter?
03:52I got a loose tooth.
03:54It hurts when I chew anything harder than pudding.
03:58Mm.
03:58Open up.
03:59Let's take a look.
04:01Oh, yeah.
04:02That baby's almost ready to come out.
04:04Mom says all my teeth are gonna fall out.
04:07Well, she's right.
04:09Sometimes some things have to fall out
04:10to make room for new ones.
04:11You must be getting a lot of new hair
04:14because there's plenty of room up there.
04:21That's cute.
04:23But enough about me.
04:28You know, once we pull that tooth,
04:30we'll put it under your pillow
04:31and the tooth fairy will bring you money.
04:33If you lose enough teeth,
04:35you'll be able to buy your video game.
04:38What do you mean, pull my tooth?
04:41Well, Rich,
04:42that permanent tooth is all ready to come in.
04:44It'll grow in crooked
04:45if we don't get rid of that baby tooth.
04:47Let's wait and see if it falls out by itself, okay?
04:51Well, okay.
04:52We can wait for a while,
04:53but not too long.
04:55Deal?
04:56Deal.
04:57Okay.
05:08Hello?
05:11Maxine, what's the matter?
05:13Laura,
05:14the most humiliating thing happened to me today.
05:18Let me guess.
05:19You only had enough lipstick to do one lip.
05:23This is serious, Laura.
05:26Oh, sorry.
05:27Does this have anything to do with Roger?
05:30You mean I stuck-up, conniving,
05:32jerry-curled plastic cap-wearing jerk?
05:36Yeah, him.
05:39I've lost him, Laura.
05:42My baby's gone.
05:47Maxine, hold on.
05:48Somebody's calling on the other line.
05:50Hello?
05:51I give an album,
05:52my elution.
05:58What do you want, Steve?
06:00I just got back from yodeling class,
06:02and I couldn't wait to come home
06:03and hop on the phone
06:04and share my latest yodel.
06:05Steve.
06:06Yodel-a-hee-hoo.
06:09Yodel-a-hee-hoo.
06:11Yodel-a-yodel-ay-yodel-ay-dee-hoo-lay-la.
06:22Steve, hang on.
06:23Maxine's on the other line,
06:24and she's in the middle of a crisis.
06:29Maxine, please,
06:30just calm down and tell me what happened.
06:32Okay.
06:34Here I go.
06:35Well, you know how I've been loaning Roger money
06:38so that he can fix up his car?
06:40Hey, I tried to warn you.
06:42I said, Maxine,
06:46be careful,
06:47because as soon as that fool
06:49gets his car fixed up,
06:51he's going to dump you.
06:54Yeah.
06:55You told me a hundred times.
06:57Mm-hmm.
06:58So what happened?
06:59As soon as that fool
07:00got his car fixed up,
07:02he dumped me.
07:05What a worm.
07:06Hang on.
07:08Steve?
07:09Yes, my sultry strudel?
07:12I can't talk right now.
07:13Maxine's a basket case.
07:15Roger just dumped her.
07:16Oh, no.
07:18Well, he must have finished
07:19fixing up his car.
07:21You got it.
07:22Well, you go soothe
07:23your ailing friend
07:24my boat.
07:25This is brought first.
07:37Speak to me.
07:40Hey, you know,
07:41it's me, Arkman.
07:43Uh, uh, Steve?
07:45I'm on my remote phone,
07:46and you're not coming in very clear.
07:47Why don't you try
07:48calling me back next week?
07:50Never mind.
07:51I'll just come over
07:51and talk to you in person.
07:53Oh, good news.
07:54You're coming in
07:55loud and clear now.
07:56What's up?
07:59Listen,
08:00I've got some juicy gossip
08:02that you didn't hear from me.
08:04Comprende, compadre?
08:05Out with it, Steve.
08:06I got calories to burn
08:07before I sleep.
08:08Roger, dump Max.
08:09No.
08:10Yep.
08:11Oh, he must have finished
08:12fixing up his car.
08:14Yep.
08:16Poor Maxine.
08:17She always picks the losers.
08:18Listen, I gotta go.
08:20I'm gonna go spread
08:20the news to all my friends.
08:23Well, come to think of it,
08:25you are all my friends.
08:27In that case,
08:28mission accomplished.
08:29I'm Peter, saying.
08:36Oh.
08:37Ooh-hoo.
08:38Ha-ha-ha.
08:40Ha-ha-ha.
08:41Ha-ha-ha.
08:56What's that?
08:58Waldo!
09:00Yo, Waldo!
09:02Eddie?
09:04Is that you?
09:05Talk louder.
09:07Waldo, check the receiver.
09:11Is it upside down?
09:19What's up?
09:20Big news, buddy.
09:22Roger and Maxine are incommunicado.
09:25Wow.
09:26Is that in Mexico?
09:30No, they're not speaking to each other.
09:32Roger dumped her.
09:34He left her in Mexico?
09:38They're not in Mexico.
09:40They broke up.
09:41Here's your chance, man.
09:42I don't want to go to Mexico.
09:46Waldo, didn't you tell me
09:48you had a big crush on Maxine?
09:50Hey, that's the secret.
09:51That's just between you, me,
09:53and the wet sea men I wrote it in.
09:55I know that.
09:57Look, all I'm saying
09:58is you like Maxine
09:59and now she's available.
10:01So make your move, man.
10:03Get real.
10:04Maxine is drop-dead gorgeous.
10:06She never go out
10:07with a chucklehead like me.
10:08Well, you never know
10:09unless you try.
10:11Then I'll never know.
10:12I really like her a lot
10:13and it would hurt me bad
10:14if she shot me down.
10:16Hold on, Waldo.
10:17Incoming call.
10:19Speak to me.
10:20Hey, Anno.
10:22Earthman again.
10:23Listen, I've got Laura
10:24on the other line
10:25and she wants me to warn you
10:27not to go blabbing
10:28about what happened
10:28between Roger and Maxine.
10:31Oh, don't worry, I won't.
10:32Good.
10:33Anymore.
10:34What?
10:34Well, you see,
10:35I told Waldo
10:35because he's got a thing
10:36for Maxine.
10:37I'm trying to convince him
10:38to ask her out
10:39but he's afraid
10:39she'll say no.
10:41I still leave her.
10:42Hang on.
10:43Sweetums, guess what?
10:46What?
10:47Waldo likes Maxine.
10:49He wants to date her
10:50but he's too chicken to ask.
10:51You're kidding.
10:52Hey, I ain't never a kid
10:53when he comes to
10:54a lot more.
10:57Steve, stay on the line.
11:00Maxine?
11:01Yeah.
11:03Major scoop.
11:04Roger wrecked his car?
11:08No.
11:10Waldo likes you.
11:12Waldo?
11:14Yeah.
11:15Waldo Faldo?
11:19Yeah.
11:20Waldo Geraldo Faldo?
11:24Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:26Listen, would you ever
11:27consider going out with him?
11:28I don't know.
11:31Maybe.
11:32If he asked...
11:34Hold on.
11:35Steve,
11:36Maxine said
11:36she might go out with him.
11:38Anna, Maxine said
11:39she'll go out with Waldo.
11:41Ooh.
11:42Yo, yo, yo, Waldo.
11:43Maxine said
11:44she can't wait
11:45to go out with you.
11:53Really?
11:54When?
11:55When?
11:56When?
11:57When?
11:59I don't know.
12:01Maybe tomorrow?
12:03Tomorrow night,
12:04a movie.
12:04Tomorrow night,
12:05a movie.
12:06Pick her up at 7.
12:08Tomorrow night,
12:09a movie.
12:09Pick her up at 7.
12:10Bring flowers and candy.
12:16Okay.
12:17Okay.
12:20Okay.
12:21Okay.
12:21Okay.
12:22Bye.
12:23Bye.
12:43Carl.
12:45Hmm?
12:46What are you doing?
12:47I'm tying a string around this doorknob.
12:50It's time to pull Richie's tooth.
12:52Oh, Carl, don't do this.
12:55Well, why not?
12:56I pulled Eddie's teeth this way.
12:58Right.
12:59And until he was 12 years old, he screamed every time he heard a door slam.
13:05Richie's tooth needs to come out.
13:07I know, Carl, but he's scared.
13:09Can't we find a less dramatic way to do this?
13:15What?
13:16You are doing it again, Harriet.
13:19You are doing it again.
13:22Doing what, Carl?
13:23You're behaving like a mother.
13:26And what's that supposed to mean?
13:28You're being overprotective.
13:30Harriet, have you learned nothing from the tragedy of the sea lion?
13:36Don't start with me, Carl.
13:39The massive female sea lion lies on a remote beach, contentedly nursing her pups.
13:47Without warning, a seagull makes a darting dive.
13:51Shh!
13:52The mama sea lion rolls her blubbery tonnage over onto her pups.
13:56Disappointed, the gull wings away.
14:00But the mama sea lion heaves her humongous belly off of her young.
14:05But alas...
14:10It is too late.
14:13The pups have been mother smothered.
14:21Carl.
14:22Yes?
14:23Take a long look at me.
14:25And then a long look at you.
14:28Who's more likely to smother something?
14:38You better get back out here when I think of a snappy comeback.
14:44Richie?
14:46What's up, Uncle Carl?
14:48It's time to pull that tooth.
14:50Bye.
14:51Take it easy, take it easy.
14:53I'm gonna use a very simple method that my father used on me.
14:57What method?
14:59Well, take a seat right here on this piano bench.
15:01Nuh-uh.
15:03Okay.
15:05I tell you what.
15:06I'll demonstrate the whole thing for you, okay?
15:09Now, first I want you to notice that the front door is open.
15:13See?
15:14And around the doorknob is a little piece of string attached to it.
15:17See?
15:18So?
15:19So?
15:20You'll be sitting right there on the piano bench.
15:22Like this.
15:23See?
15:25Now, on the other end of the string is a little slipknot.
15:28See?
15:29And we'll just slide the slipknot over your tooth just like this.
15:35See?
15:36Then what?
15:37Well, you...
15:37Hi, big guy.
15:38No, no, no!
15:39No!
15:41No!
15:43No!
15:43No!
15:44No!
15:45No!
15:47No!
15:47It's a jacket.
15:51Did I do that?
15:53Ah.
16:05Hello?
16:06Hi, Laura.
16:07Oh, Maxine, I was just thinking about you.
16:09So did you have a good time with Waldo?
16:10It was a date. I'll never forget. Oh girl. Tell me everything every single detail, okay?
16:29What's up? Waldo? Yeah, sir. I mean, you said you were gonna call me as soon as you got home
16:34from your date with Maxine. Yeah, but I want the shade first
16:40Waldo, you're supposed to shave before you go on a date. Well, thanks a lot, Mr. Too Late Now
16:47Just tell me about your date. Okay. I didn't want to be late, so when I rang the doorbell, it
16:53was exactly
16:53seven o'clock. Good for you. Unfortunately, it wasn't Maxine's house. It belonged to some cranky old man who didn't
17:02like being interrupted. It took me five minutes to pry his pit bull off my butt.
17:11Oh, man. Hey, but I didn't lose my cool. I just used the old noggin. Oh, what'd you do? I
17:18drove around the block honking my horn and screaming her name.
17:21Good thinking. Hang on, Waldo. Incoming call. Speak to me.
17:29Hello. Erkman. Steve, I'm busy. Me too, but counting rack chromosomes is tedious work, and I needed a break.
17:36Goodbye, Steve. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Have you heard from Waldo yet? My butt collection isn't the only thing
17:42on pins and needles.
17:43He's on the other line now. He was telling me about his date with Maxine when I was rudely interrupted.
17:50Oh, you call me and tell me what happened, right?
17:53Uh, yeah, absolutely. Bye.
18:06Hello. Hey, baby cakes.
18:10Steve, I'm busy.
18:11Okay, okay. I just want to know, have you heard from Maxine yet?
18:15I'm just dying to know what happened on our date with Waldo.
18:17I'm on the other line with her right now.
18:20Oh, you call me and tell me what happened, right?
18:23Oh, uh-huh, sure. Absolutely. Bye.
18:27Maxine, I'm back.
18:28Where was I?
18:30Waldo was driving down your street honking his horn and screaming your name.
18:33So all of a sudden, Maxine runs out of her house.
18:36She jumps into my truck and says,
18:37Shut up in Florida for the neighbor's killers.
18:41Great. So what movie did y'all see?
18:43Waldo said he was dying to see Malcolm 10.
18:53Malcolm 10?
18:55Yeah, don't you know your Roman numerals?
18:58Malcolm X is Malcolm 10.
19:00So, so what happened after the movie?
19:02It must have rained because when we left the theater,
19:04we had to cross a big mud puddle.
19:07Oh, Lord, don't tell me he fell in.
19:09So I took off my jacket and put it over the puddle
19:11so Maxine's feet wouldn't get all muddy.
19:13Oh, nice move. Very gallant.
19:16And then he picked up the jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders.
19:24Mud all over your dress.
19:26Mud all over her dress.
19:30Man, disaster big time.
19:33I started to get mad, but then Waldo did the strangest thing.
19:37What did he do?
19:38I sat in the puddle so we could match.
19:47Yo, I'll bet that made her feel a lot better.
19:50It's weird, but somehow it actually made me feel better.
19:55And that's when he kissed me.
19:57Get out!
19:58Yep, I just took General Raym at her face,
20:01closed my eyes, and fired with both lips.
20:04Got her smack dab on the cheek.
20:06Get out!
20:08Laura, every guy I've ever gone out with
20:10has tried to take advantage of me,
20:12but not Waldo.
20:14I always thought he was so dense,
20:16but there's a lot more to him than I thought.
20:20He's really sweet and I like him a lot.
20:24Do you think that's crazy?
20:26No, that's not crazy.
20:27That's terrific.
20:29Eddie, Maxine is the first girl I've ever dated
20:31who doesn't make fun of me when I mess up.
20:34I kind of think she likes me and I'm crazy about her.
20:37And just think I was almost too chicken to even ask her out.
20:40Now, you see, sometimes you just gotta go for it.
20:43Laura, thanks for listening to my troubles.
20:47You're a good friend.
20:49Don't mention it.
20:50Hey, you're always there for me.
20:52Eddie, I appreciate your helping advice
20:53and I'm lucky to have a buddy like you.
20:55Aw, forget it.
20:57Takes one to know one.
20:59Well, good night.
21:05No, I have four brothers and three sisters.
21:15I'm the only child, but do you have any pets?
21:19A dog, a cat, and something that lives behind a refrigerator.
21:27We don't know what it is, but we call it Bob.
21:35Something told me you like animals.
21:39Waldo, don't you think it's weird?
21:42I mean, we've known each other for years
21:44and we never thought about going out together.
21:47Well, actually I did.
21:49I thought about it a lot.
21:52And let me tell you, thinking ain't my thing.
22:18I'm not saying I'm the other one.
22:20I don't know.
22:21I don't know it.
22:21I don't know.
22:22I don't know what I'm doing.
22:23I don't know.
22:23I'm not saying I'm the other one.
22:24go, Mom.
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