00:07Hello.
00:07Goodbye.
00:08Wait, my old speed demonette.
00:11Where's the fire?
00:12Excluding, of course, the blaze burning in my heart.
00:17Look, Steve, I'm meeting Maxine at the mall,
00:19so I really don't have time to reject you, okay?
00:22Well, actually, I'm here to Seattle.
00:25Shoot, I just wasted a perfectly good excuse.
00:30Hey, hello.
00:32Oh.
00:35She loves me.
00:37She loves me.
00:39She loves me.
00:41Oh, she loves me.
00:42She loves me.
00:44She loves me.
00:46Oh, I really lucked out.
00:51Oh, hello.
00:52Goodbye.
00:53Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:55Before you go, I have a big favor to ask of.
00:58Steve, for the last time, you can't be seen in public with me.
01:02Now, there's irony.
01:03Less than an hour ago, my father told me the same thing.
01:08Anywho, you once mentioned you got a primo deal on an ID bracelet for Jolene.
01:13Yeah.
01:13I know a guy who gave me a real good price.
01:16Well, could you send me my way?
01:17I want to get an ID bracelet for Laura.
01:21Why?
01:23Well, because we've reached the jewelry stage.
01:26Well, that is true.
01:28She has had a ring in your nose for a long time.
01:34Hardy har har.
01:37For your information, Laura has warmed up to me.
01:42Whatever you say, Steve.
01:44See ya.
01:48Step one, ID bracelet.
01:52Step two, proposal.
01:55Step three, wedding.
01:57Step four, wedding night.
02:06Step four, wedding night.
02:14It's a rare condition, this day and age.
02:18To read any good news on the newspaper page.
02:22A loving tradition of the grand design.
02:25Some people say, it's even harder to find.
02:28Well then there must be some magic clue
02:32Inside these gentle walls
02:35Cause all I see is a tower of dreams
02:40Real love bursting out of every scene
02:44As days go by
02:48We're gonna fill our house with happiness
02:52Who may cry
02:55But we'll smother the blues with dead love
02:59As days go by
03:01There's room for you, room for me
03:06For gentle hearts and opportunity
03:08As days go by
03:13It's the bigger love of the family
03:34Yes, Jordan has the ball
03:35Yes
03:36He shoots
03:36Yes
03:37He scores
03:38Yes, yes, yes, yes
03:42Yes
03:46Harriet, throw a bell
03:49Thanks for telling me, Carl
03:50Now make sure you tell me who it is
03:55All right, I'm coming
03:56Hold your horses
03:58Would you knock it off?
04:00Yes
04:00What the hell?
04:02Low, Lieutenant Murtaugh
04:06Wisler?
04:07Mind if I come in?
04:08Not at all, sir
04:12Have a seat
04:15What are you watching?
04:16The NBA playoffs, sir
04:18What a scorcher
04:19The Bulls are down by one
04:21Four seconds left
04:22Jordan has the ball
04:23He shoots
04:24It's
04:24I hate basketball
04:30Let's pretend we like it, sir
04:34Unbelievable
04:35In 40 years of broadcasting
04:37I've never seen a shot like that
04:39Michael Jordan took his own rebound
04:41And?
04:41Well, you saw it
04:45What can I do for you, sir?
04:48I'm here to talk about our futures
04:51Wisler
04:52Have you heard any departmental scuttlebutt
04:55Regarding promotions?
04:57Well, yeah
04:58I overheard a rumor
04:59That you're going to be promoted to captain
05:00Good
05:02I started that rumor
05:07I figured, sir
05:08That's why I started the rumor
05:09That you're going to promote me to lieutenant
05:12Can that, Winslow?
05:14Nobody likes a gossip
05:19Carl!
05:20Did you see that Michael Jordan shot?
05:24No
05:26I missed it
05:28Rachel, you remember Lieutenant Murtaugh
05:30Of course
05:31Hello, Lieutenant
05:37Hello
05:41Hello
05:42Hello
05:44Well, if you two will excuse me
05:46I have just earned the right to
05:47Pig out on some ice cream
05:55Rachel is remarkably pretty
06:01Oh, no
06:05You don't agree?
06:06Oh, no
06:07No, I do, sir
06:08It's just that, uh
06:09Well, I
06:09Oh, no
06:10Oh, no
06:13Hey, hey, hey, hey
06:23Oh, no
06:35Oh, no
06:37Oh, no
06:40funny. Oh, oh, nothing.
06:49What is it, Carl?
06:52I'm sorry, y'all, but I was just thinking about Lieutenant Murtaugh.
06:56That guy cracks me up. He does?
06:59Yes. He just told me that
07:03he likes Rachel and wants to date her.
07:16What's really funny
07:17is that he's serious.
07:36Rachel, let me be honest here, okay?
07:40Lieutenant Murtaugh is my boss, and, well, there may be a promotion in it for me soon,
07:45so I'd really appreciate it if you go out with him just once.
07:48I don't know.
07:49Go ahead, hon. Give it a shot.
07:52Yeah, at least you get a chance to get out of the house and go to a nice restaurant.
07:55Yeah, you might even meet a cute waiter.
08:03Okay, I'll go out with him, but just as a favor to you.
08:07And let me get one thing straight here.
08:09It is not because I am hired up for a date.
08:12Oh, yeah, sure.
08:13I'll betcha.
08:28Get him!
08:30Ah!
08:30Ah!
08:31Ah!
08:34Ah!
08:44Did I do that?
08:54Steve!
08:54Huh?
08:57Oh, no, Waldo.
09:01Well, you wanted to know who sold me Jolene's ID bracelet.
09:04Waldo's the guy, and he can give you a great deal.
09:06Have you heard my motto?
09:08No.
09:09Dang, I was hoping you'd remember it.
09:16Well, uh, I gotta split.
09:19Where we going, Eddie?
09:21No, Waldo. You're staying here.
09:23Steve wants to buy something from you.
09:26Oh, cool.
09:32Waldo, watch me carefully as I leave so that you can find your way out.
09:50Oh, cool.
09:57Okay, Waldo, where's the merchandise?
09:59My what?
10:00Your inventory.
10:02My huh?
10:03Your ID bracelets!
10:06Oh, why didn't you say so? They're right here.
10:11Those are watches.
10:13Oh, sorry, wrong floor.
10:21See anything you like?
10:23How much is that one?
10:2440 bucks.
10:26I'll give you 30.
10:2725.
10:2725.
10:2820.
10:2915 and that's as high as I'm going.
10:32Sold!
10:34Sucker.
10:46Wait a minute.
10:48Where's Richie?
10:49Oh, my gosh.
10:51What's wrong?
10:51Richie and I were playing hide and seek.
10:53He hit and I got bored.
10:56How long ago was that?
10:58About an hour.
11:02Yeah?
11:03That's absolutely right.
11:05Well, it's about time.
11:09Found you.
11:10You're it.
11:15I'm gonna let her sweat for a few hours.
11:24Oh, Rachel.
11:26Oh, you look gorgeous.
11:27Rachel, you look sensational.
11:30I do?
11:32I'll go change.
11:34Wow!
11:36I don't want to look too good for this date.
11:39I mean, the last thing I want is for Lieutenant Murtaugh to start thinking...
11:43...thoughts.
11:46Honey, look on the bright side.
11:48You're going out with a man who can walk, talk and has a job.
11:52I'd settle for two out of three.
11:56Yeah, Rach Burke up.
11:57I mean, how bad could it be?
12:00Rachel!
12:04I know you're in there.
12:10Come out with your dancing shoes on!
12:20Have a good time.
12:35You look beautiful, babe.
12:41How?
12:43If I were you, I wouldn't be here when I get back.
13:02Well, Lieutenant, thanks for a unique evening, but that headache that I got when you picked me up is really
13:10pounding now.
13:11That's too bad.
13:15I don't get headaches.
13:17Must be the steel plate.
13:25Um...
13:26Lieutenant, I...
13:27Come on, babe.
13:29First name's here, huh?
13:30Call me Lou.
13:32L-I-E-U.
13:36Gosh, my head hurts.
13:41Oh, you...
13:44I, uh...
13:45I think I hear somebody trying to steal your car.
13:48No way.
13:49We'd hear the explosion.
13:54So, did you, uh, enjoy yourself tonight?
14:00Can I be honest with you?
14:01Certainly.
14:04I didn't have a very good time.
14:06Of course you did.
14:09No, I didn't.
14:11Now, take dinner, for instance.
14:13Not only did you insist on ordering it for me, but then you, you cut my steak up in little
14:19tiny pieces and you tried to feed me.
14:22I'm surprised you didn't burp me.
14:28Is that an invitation, baby?
14:44Steve, you can go now. I'm home safe.
14:47Well, perhaps I should escort you up to your room.
14:49After all, most accidents do occur in the home.
14:53If you don't leave right now, there's gonna be a really big accident right here.
14:58I see. Well, I cannot bid you adieu just yet, my pet.
15:03Not until you feast your fabulous eyes on...
15:14...a this.
15:18A present?
15:19A bauble for a bodacious babe.
15:24An ID bracelet?
15:27To Laura.
15:29Oh, my glove?
15:31Sleeve?
15:34I bought it from Waldo.
15:35It's a miracle the spelling is as good as it is.
15:40Well, thank you, Steve, but I can't keep this.
15:44Well, why not, Puddin' Pop?
15:47Because we're not going steady.
15:49But we should. Our relationship is progressing nicely.
15:53Remember, just last week you blew me a kiss.
15:59Steve, I was spitting out my gum.
16:04Oh.
16:07Come here, Steve. Come here.
16:10You know, this is my fault.
16:12When we first met, I used to tell you every day that there would never be anything between us.
16:16But lately, I've gotten lazy.
16:21You know, it's been a month since I told you to stop bugging me.
16:25From now on, I will tell you every single day that our relationship will never, ever, ever go anywhere.
16:36Okay.
16:38But in the meantime, why don't you just wear the bracelet?
16:44Go home!
16:45Go home!
16:53Well, I'm tempted to leave.
17:03You know, that dress looks stunning.
17:07Makes me think.
17:09Thoughts.
17:11Uh, Lieutenant.
17:14You know, I've tried to be nice.
17:17I've tried to be tactful.
17:19But now it appears I'm going to have to be blunt.
17:24You repulse me.
17:28So, you want to slow dance and neck a little?
17:34Go home!
17:39Go home!
17:40Go home!
17:47They tell me that you're leaving.
17:50I can't believe it's true.
17:54Cause, girl, there's just no living without you.
18:01Don't take your love away from me.
18:10Don't you leave my heart in misery.
18:17Cause if you do, then I'll be blue.
18:22Cause breaking up is hard to do.
18:28They say that breaking up is hard to do.
18:37Now I know.
18:39I know that it's true.
18:44Don't say that this is the end.
18:49Instead of breaking up, I wish that we were making up again.
18:57I beg of you.
19:04Oh, say goodbye.
19:07Can't we give our love just one more try?
19:14Come on, baby.
19:17Let's start anew.
19:20Cause breaking up is hard to do.
19:37You don't live here.
19:40Well, neither do you.
19:42And what the hell are we doing here?
19:44Well, certainly not Harmony.
19:47I need a drink.
19:49Me too.
19:50And I know just the place.
20:02Another round, Lou.
20:04Set them up, kid.
20:09Here I am again.
20:11Drowning my sorrows in root beer floats.
20:15Yeah, well, my sorrows don't drown.
20:17They just dog paddle around in my heart.
20:23You know something, kid?
20:25Women mystify me.
20:27Yeah, when God created women, he should have supplied a set of instructions.
20:32I really tried to impress Rachel tonight, but she threw a hissy fit just because I ordered for her.
20:38I always thought women go for a take charge, tell them what they want kind of guy.
20:43Yeah, well, I'm more of a put them on a pedestal, you're lucky if they speak to you kind of
20:47guy.
20:52Well, my approach doesn't work.
20:54And yours is pathetic.
20:58Maybe we should just give up women.
21:02No, Lou.
21:02Lou, no matter how frustrating they are, we need them.
21:08Yeah, you're right, kid.
21:10We need women to crank out more men.
21:18Gee, Lou, I can't imagine why Rachel didn't flip for you.
21:26Go figure.
21:28You know, Louie, I've loved Laura Winslow ever since I first laid eyes on her.
21:35So far, she hasn't returned my love.
21:38But the hope of winning her is what keeps me going.
21:43That hope is enough to get me out of bed every morning into my Scooby-Doo slippers.
21:53I hear you, kid.
21:55I've only had one date with Rachel.
21:58But that girl's really gotten to me.
22:01She's copped this cop's heart.
22:13So we can't give up, Lou.
22:15We must pursue our lady loves.
22:19You're right, kid.
22:21A toast.
22:22To the women we love.
22:24And to the day when they can stand the sight of us.
22:31Thanks.
22:35Thanks.
22:36Thanks, well, you're right.
22:36Oh, my.
22:37Thanks.
22:38Thanks.
22:57Thanks, man.
22:58Thanks for having me.
22:58Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
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