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00:05last will and testament joseph harris okay joe who gets what well i'm gonna leave all my worldly
00:15goods to nicole uh including all my paintings except i decided to leave one painting to michael
00:20just to remember me by which one you want that is very generous of you uh actually you know what
00:26i'd like the one the piece in the back corner by the bed there's no art there just my stereo
00:31that's
00:32the one and now you don't get any of my art all right would you write that down i don't
00:38see why
00:38we got to do these wills anyway michael come on i mean we're both young we're both full of life
00:43i'm in good shape it's designed to protect nicole and it's very important for her to you know to
00:50know that she's taken care of grow up be mature all right michael in the event of your death no
00:59no what no death for me thank you michael this is a will we can't make a will without talking
01:07about your death yeah talked about my death i can live with your death michael grow up be mature
01:15i am i just don't want to call it death what do you want to call it i want to
01:20call it uh going to
01:21the movies all right in the event of your untimely going to the movies do you want your popcorn buried
01:31or cremated
01:36hey forget it i'm not leaving you the stereo okay joey joey did you learn nothing while we were
01:42doing our wills didn't you learn that we have to live for the moment enjoy every moment because
01:48nobody knows what the next moment is going to break i know there will be no moment when you get
01:53my stereo
01:58oh the game is still on and you want to watch it right the game man the game the game
02:02the game
02:15is this reception really bad or is the tv gone tv's gone we've been robbed mikey
02:28look at this plate look what they did they got my computer they got my printer but there's good
02:34news mikey what i'm leaving you my stereo
02:45you can count on me no matter what you do you can count on me no matter where you go
02:55i'm standing by
02:57by your side i'll be right behind no one loves you more than i do put your hand in my
03:04eye
03:05i can see a part of me and you
03:10there's something special that comes shining through
03:14i hear it in your laughter and i feel it when you cry
03:19i will be right there for you until the day i die
03:25you can count on me no matter what you do you can count on me no matter where you go
03:35you can count on me
03:40we better call the police
03:41hey what if whoever ripped us off is still in the apartment what if this is a robbery in progress
03:48oh there's a thought
03:52maybe we should call the police from someplace safe huh like wisconsin
03:59what the hell are you doing protecting my property
04:02put the back down would you come on this is not walking tall you're not bufitt pusser come on
04:08cover me
04:14oh god all right oh god
04:21i'm gonna check out the bathroom
04:34joe joe you all right
04:42i am now
04:46i'll check mccall's room you check your room
04:56okay
04:59i'm coming in there now
05:02huh hello hello hello i'm coming in okay i'm warning you i'm coming in right now
05:10and i'm telling you right up front i'm standing here i've got i got a fish joe i
05:25mike mike mikey what happened mikey mike
05:32there was another guy in there with a fish joe
05:35we both panicked i threw my fish he threw his fish
05:38what happened the mirror broke
05:45i'm not good at this all right
05:47all right i guess there's nobody here then i'm calling the cops i'm calling the cops
05:52okay look at this skylight's broken i guess that's how they got in huh look at this
05:58they they ate a meal they they ate your leftover pot roast
06:06serves them right
06:10hello yes hello yes i like to
06:13i'll hold
06:16look at this they they stole everything
06:18worth anything here mikey they didn't take any of my panties
06:22i'm saying
06:25hello yes yes i i like to report an emergency
06:28i i'll hold sure
06:31yeah you can be on hold forever
06:32they're gonna come right back i told them it was an emergency
06:34they're gonna take care of me
06:36hey take it from me okay i've been through this before i've been robbed before and the cops told me
06:40that if i didn't have a description of the guy forget it there's nothing they could do
06:43well i didn't have a description then and we don't have a description now
06:46would you give me a break i'm working through the system you know i'm a taxpayer i paid for
06:49the system i'm gonna use the system i own the system the system will listen to me
06:53hello yes i'll i'll hold you bet
07:02hello hello hello hello yes yes no you stay on the line right now
07:08i'm calling from a bank i got nine hostages and a hand grenade
07:15that's right okay fine i'm next
07:22michael are the most overworked cops in the country they do what they can
07:26i know i know
07:30what's going on what happened be calm okay this is no big deal
07:35you got robbed look they got in through the skylight it was a skylight job
07:43we were robbed yeah but look everything is gonna be okay it's all fine
07:48what did they take they took everything that doesn't have joey's signature on it
07:54you'd still have a tv if you would have signed it
07:58but it's okay look the police are gonna find this guy hey i don't know about that you can't get
08:02him on
08:03phone what are we gonna do i'll tell you what i'm gonna do this isn't the first robbery in the
08:08building i'm gonna close the restaurant tomorrow night and invite all the tenants down to discuss
08:13creating a neighborhood watch committee great idea that's a great idea we'll definitely be there
08:18what for what do you mean what for come on what do people in this building care come on i've
08:24been
08:24living in this building for nine years i don't even know who my neighbors are let alone trust them
08:28i'm like that guy in 4d obvious criminal type well what's that you know he's got that that
08:35little thin mustache and he's got that beard he wears all them weird clothes
08:46i'm going to the big house aren't i
08:56unfortunately mr and mrs joe's citizens feel there's nothing they can do to prevent crime not
09:01true we can send a loud warning to the would-be thieves and burglars by banding together and saying
09:06stop this building is protected by all of us or in your case tell them come on in help yourself
09:19i don't get it i just don't get a where is everybody and i don't only left a note in
09:24every
09:24tenant's mailbox i left a message on every answering machine apathy
09:30not unusual no one pays attention till it happens to them hey i told you we couldn't count on the
09:37neighbors didn't i face it we're on our own all right we go back we fix the skylight
09:43we move on with our lives because there's nothing else that could be done
09:48i was robbed
09:51they were in my room oh what when they broke in they were in my room
09:57my mother's locket was in this box in my closet it's gone they were in my daughter's room in my
10:05closet they went through my stuff all right honey look calm down we'll we'll all go up and we'll look
10:11for it no no i want to get out of here i want to live someplace else i could never
10:16sleep in my room
10:17again i don't feel safe just get on with our lives huh joe tell her there's nothing else that could
10:25be done
10:45honey why are you up i can't sleep that's three nights in a row i heard something on the roof
10:53okay sweetie look you really you have to get over this you know you you've been on baseball bat
10:59patrol every night this week and even if a guy does come down i gotta tell you you're going about
11:04this all wrong it's all wrong come here let me show you something first of all i'm gonna choke up
11:09on
11:10the bat all right choke up you know like now if the burglar approaches you want to keep this shoulder
11:14tight no keep your head straight all right then you want to swing through the burglar and boom it's a
11:18bullet burglar deep to the other field this burglar is out of here you're not amused
11:25the police said it could happen again because now the robbers know how to get in and they know that
11:30the insurance company is going to replace everything sweetie look i understand that you you feel very
11:34insecure because of what happened but listen we this place is a lot safer we got a new lock on
11:38the door
11:38there are there are bars on the skylight nobody's getting in here really so you can relax okay and you
11:45can stop playing little booby traps all over the house all right no more water buckets on top of
11:51the door huh sorry all right and no more trip wires on top of the stairs i mean the thrill
11:57of flying
11:58through the air was very exciting i gotta admit that was fun but uh ultimately i i ripped a good
12:05pair of
12:05pants sorry all right i'll make a deal with you you stop booby trapping the loft and i will check
12:13the roof
12:15you'll go up on the roof for me you bet hey it'll make you feel safe and secure i'll do
12:20that okay you go to
12:23sleep you know you are really brave you're gonna go up on the roof alone in the dark with burglar
12:32killer
12:36maniacs
12:36thanks dad
12:41you bet
12:50joe come on get up joe hey hey come on come on you promised nicole you'd go up on the
12:56roof come on
13:00let's go what did i do that for because she's hearing things and you're a great guy
13:03oh come on
13:05huh are you gonna go up there with me you all right i'll go with you
13:13wuss
13:18well she's really she's really worked up about all this huh yeah but you know what this is good at
13:21least
13:21now she'll finally stop leaving those booby traps all over the house
13:31nicole sorry
13:52what are you doing it's dark so you want a plane to land on you
13:59turn it off
14:01we want to be invisible we don't we don't want to attract attention okay all right
14:06what the hell is that
14:08it's for me
14:10i took it along in case nicole got scared i told her she can call us from the other line
14:14it's way well hi honey we're fine we
14:17do you do you hear people up on the roof she leaves people it's us
14:23it's us honey it's us that she's exactly right it's us go back to sleep okay good night
14:30oh
14:33hey mike come here come here
14:40you're a joke you know it's really cute hey listen
14:47you know i'm thinking what i'm thinking maybe it's not such a good idea for both of us to be
14:51up
14:51here on the roof at the same time why not well you know what if something happens to both of
14:56us
14:58that's a good point such a good thing we made up those wills huh i mean you never know when
15:03we
15:03could you know just go to the movies
15:08you know we decided what goes to nicole we need to decide who nicole goes to you know
15:12that's true so what do you think i think the judge good good what if when we go to the
15:21movies
15:22the judge is saving our seats
15:30my sister no your sister's a psycho
15:35yeah all right who would you suggest you go to i would personally i'd say my mother what captain guilt
15:44captain guilt how could you say that i really should call it on
15:54what the hell is that somebody's up here in the roof
16:01oh god the movie's starting
16:06oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god
16:19there he is he's headed straight for your skylight
16:49i bet you that's the same guy that broke me the first time yeah he probably came back from my
16:53paintings
16:57look at this the bars he didn't expect the bars he's leaving he's leaving
17:02he's going straight through the skylight over 4d which has no bars
17:07oh boy so now what what what what do we do we just jump him
17:11did you sign your will yeah go ahead
17:17i'm going to cubs give me that
17:24this is judge margaret wilber i got some clown trying to break into my building at 627 north
17:30broom street i want a squad car here inside of 10 seconds or there's going to be hell to pay
17:34that's right judge margaret wilber
17:58it's nice to see such a large turnout for this building's second neighborhood watch meeting
18:03i guess that's due to the efforts of two of your neighbors michael taylor and joey harris
18:09whose concern led to an arrest and hopefully a conviction
18:15it's in the bag
18:18and perhaps now mr taylor mr harris will say a few words about their bravery come on out
18:33uh thank you thank you um
18:41we didn't ask i'm not really accustomed to speaking in front of a microphone so uh
18:47i'll just pretend i'm singing into my shower head
18:53thank you
18:58uh i guess guess uh i don't have to ask where we're all from huh
19:07yeah boy dating in the 80s wacky crazy thing
19:10but seriously of all the songs that marvin hamless wrote
19:21look look look i've i've been living in this uh building for nine years now
19:25and i'm really embarrassed to say that most of you people out there are strangers to me
19:32but i'm not embarrassed to say that catching those bad guys last night had nothing to do
19:36with us being brave because we were scared that's because we were alone now if we keep coming to these
19:44meetings then we're not going to be alone anymore right and those bad guys know that we're not alone
19:49anymore then maybe it's the bad guys that are going to be scared the next time
19:54i used to believe that there wasn't anything that anybody could do
19:59and then i thought hey maybe i can do something alone but now i know that we've got to know
20:05that we
20:10you need me i'm in 4b
20:14margaret wilbur
20:173b
20:21i got the world on a string sitting on a rainbow
20:27i can make the world go with my finger
20:32so what a life what a love
20:37come on
20:43i gotta hand it to you guys you brought the whole building together
20:47we're gonna be looking after each other from now on nick you'll be able to sleep good at night
20:51and everything's gonna be back to normal the insurance company's gonna give us a check
20:54and we're gonna replace everything that was stolen
20:58almost everything
21:02hey nick listen
21:05you know you gotta you gotta know that it's a it's a rough world outside those doors but you
21:09gotta feel safe you gotta feel secure here this is your home and we're gonna try and protect you
21:13the best we can but there are a lot of harsh realities that we don't even think we should try
21:17to protect you from so we just want you to know that that in truth it's not really likely they're
21:22gonna find your locket i know that okay we know that nothing's gonna be able to replace your mom's
21:28locket we're not dumb enough to try to do that but we want to give you this here this is
21:34from both
21:34of us it's not to replace what you lost it's just to show you how much you have now
21:43it's beautiful open it up
21:48all of us on one side and my mom on the other side
21:56yeah hoping that maybe someday give this to your daughter
22:01tell her that your two dads gave it to you huh think of it as sort of a brand new
22:05family heirloom that
22:07will be in this family a long time because this one ain't going nowhere
22:12i love it thanks dad you're welcome
22:19well if you don't mind i think i'm gonna go up to my room
22:23we don't mind sleep good i will
22:34honey was was there one more booby trap you wanted to mention to us
22:39oh yeah sorry get me down
22:45oh
22:45oh
22:45oh
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