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00:20how do i look better this is a facial mask i want to look good when malcolm odell gets here
00:28oh well you look good in a post-nuclear sort of way i'd wash it off if you could get
00:34michael out of
00:35the bathroom hey get out of the bathroom don't hate me because i'm beautiful
00:45look i didn't exactly tell michael about you know who coming today you know you know how he feels
00:49about him and his uh eccentricities yeah you get this weird reaction from michael if you even say
00:54the name now ow i just got this deep stabbing pain in my ear ah jerry look it's it's a
01:06woman thing
01:08that's a facial mask hey these products help us keep our natural healthy look hi
01:18honey we love you just the way you are don't change shelby great outfit yeah really with the
01:26leather and the the chain links and the spikes you see this no this this is just a little something
01:34i threw on in case a major rock star happens by today where is he where's who malcolm ow
01:42malcolm powder another woman thing you know you sprinkle it on you smell good
01:46and it's my friend and it's only going to be here until it finishes its next album
01:51oh no it's back oh no it's here you can't be here i'm not ready i am
02:08miss me
02:10ow
02:17You can count on me
02:20No matter what you do
02:22You can count on me
02:25No matter where you go
02:27Standing by your side
02:29I'll be right behind
02:31No one loves you more than I do
02:34Put your hand in mine
02:36I can see your heart of me and you
02:41A little something special
02:43That comes shining through
02:45I feel it in your laughter
02:48And I feel it when you cry
02:50I will be right there for you
02:53Until the day I die
02:56You can count on me
02:59No matter what you do
03:01You can count on me
03:04No matter where you go
03:06You can count on me
03:11So, is it true what they say?
03:13Is it lonely at the top?
03:14Well, ask them
03:16Ask who?
03:20Answer, Aj
03:27Who are these people, please?
03:29That's my business manager
03:31Road manager
03:32Personal manager
03:32And a gaggle of tarts
03:35So, where's my little Nicole then?
03:43Hi
03:44Nicole
03:46Is this you?
03:48I was expecting this little girl
03:50Not this gorgeous woman
03:52Standing here
03:53Well, you'll just have to take me
03:55For what I am
03:56Oh, it's great to see you
03:57Hey, listen
03:58Get some clothes on
03:59We're out of here
04:00Right back
04:01Come on, Shelby
04:04So, Malcolm
04:05Last time you were here
04:07You were this struggling
04:09Irresponsible
04:09Kind of a bum
04:12But now you're a big
04:13Successful rock star
04:14And I gotta ask you
04:15When are you leaving?
04:18Come on, Mikey
04:19No, no, I understand
04:20I used to be a real idiot
04:21But now I've settled into success
04:23Calmly
04:24And comfortably
04:25We're a little too calm
04:27And comfortable
04:27For our own good
04:28Then, aren't we, mate?
04:31Joe
04:31Michael
04:32Allow me to introduce
04:34Dennis Bernard
04:34Personal manager
04:36And
04:36And Jiminy Cricket
04:38Hello
04:39I'm just doing what you pay me to do, Malcolm
04:41Trying to keep you out of the discount bins
04:42Which is proving rather difficult
04:44Considering it's been eight months
04:46And the new album is nowhere in sight
04:47There are two dozen low-life degenerates
04:50Running around my building
04:51Which can only mean one thing
04:54Malcolm, you've returned
04:57To me
04:57Meg's my pet
04:58You are a vision
05:00I know
05:03We're ready, let's go
05:04Where are we going?
05:05Well, that's right
05:06Where are we going?
05:07Oh, you'll love it
05:08It's called the recording studio
05:11Where we'll be working all afternoon
05:13Hey, hey, Dennis
05:14Dennis
05:15Don't let me go in there, okay?
05:17Um, my friends don't want to spend
05:19The whole day in a
05:20In a recording studio
05:23Everyone's been dying
05:23For your new record, Malcolm
05:25Your friends are waiting, Malcolm
05:26Sooner or later
05:27You've got to go in
05:32Okay, Mother
05:38Entourage?
05:39We're out of here
05:43Oh, no, Nicole
05:44Don't worry about us
05:45Just pretend we're not here
05:46Oh, wait
05:47You did
05:50Guess that leaves us all alone, huh?
05:53What do you want to do today?
06:22I hear there's a Fellini festival
06:24Famous, successful
06:24It's like you can't get him in
06:26And so Malcolm's manager
06:27Begged him to sing something
06:28And Malcolm said
06:29He'd rather hear me sing something
06:30So I sang something
06:32I could die
06:35We've been supplanted, Joe
06:37Overthrown in our daughter's affections
06:38A coup de dad
06:43She's a fan, guys
06:44Come on
06:45You gotta understand what it's like
06:46To idolize somebody
06:47What, you had an idol?
06:49No
06:50I was the object of idolatry
06:53I played pro ball for 16 years
06:55You think I didn't have any fans?
07:01Okay, a guy named Leon
07:04But he was important to me
07:05I mean, I'd come out of the stadium
07:07After a tough game
07:08And there he'd be
07:09Sitting on his blanket
07:11Wearing his lucky hunting cap
07:12One flap up
07:13One flap down
07:16Then he had this sign that said
07:18Go Ed
07:21It was usually misspelled
07:23But
07:25Leon was always there for me
07:26City after city after city
07:29Until I got traded to Green Bay
07:32And
07:34He couldn't find it
07:38I think what Ed's trying to say
07:42Is that since he was such an important presence
07:44In Leon's life
07:46That Leon's dads
07:47Maybe felt a little underappreciated, too
07:50That's not what I meant
07:51Yes, it was
07:54See, as you guys know
07:56Parenting
07:56Can sometimes be a thankless task
07:59And Malcolm said
08:00Maybe someday I could go on tour with him
08:02Wouldn't that be great?
08:03I could follow him from city to city
08:05For the rest of my life
08:09Don't worry, Joe
08:09We'll show her
08:10We'll have another child
08:21Good night, Dad
08:22See you in the morning
08:23Good night, sweetie
08:24Hey, Nick
08:25Hey
08:26How about you come down here
08:27And you eat ice cream with us
08:29And watch TV, huh?
08:30With us
08:32Thanks, Dad
08:33But I'm exhausted
08:34I am asleep on my feet
08:36I just want to lie in my bed
08:37And dream about my day with Malcolm
08:46Let's beat him up
08:49Nah, Michael, he's my friend
08:51I'll beat him up
08:53You don't fool me
08:54You're really worried about him, aren't you?
08:55I mean, why does a guy
08:57That loves what he's doing
08:58All of a sudden
08:59Starts spending all his time
09:00Trying to avoid it?
09:03My mom and dad said
09:04That if I went into the music business
09:05That I'd fail
09:06Now, they were off
09:07By several million dollars
09:09But they knew
09:10What they were talking about
09:12Malcolm, you're back
09:13I'm so glad
09:14I'm not as tired as I thought
09:16I have these posters
09:17That I need to autograph
09:18For my friends
09:19I kind of promised them
09:20I hope you don't mind
09:21You can tell your friends this
09:23There won't be any more albums
09:24There'll be no more cassettes
09:26And no more CDs
09:28What do you mean?
09:29I mean you've picked
09:30The wrong horse, Nicole
09:31I mean
09:32I can't come up with new music
09:34Just because you want me to
09:35Hey, hey
09:36Come on, calm down, pal
09:37Don't you get it, Joe?
09:39I'm scared that I can't top
09:40My first album
09:41I'm scared that I don't
09:42Have it anymore
09:43There's nothing in my head
09:45There's no words
09:46There's no music
09:47It's empty
09:48Hey, don't worry about it
09:50Come on
09:50Hey
09:51Look, if it's not there
09:52It's not there
09:53I mean, look
09:54You and me
09:54We go back a long time, right?
09:57It's gonna come
09:57It always does
09:58No, not this time
10:00Look, I've walked out the studio
10:01I've fired my manager
10:03Look, I'm giving it up
10:05You mean you're never gonna do
10:06Any more songs?
10:07Hey, Nick
10:07Maybe we should let Malcolm be alone
10:09And we'll see him in the morning, okay?
10:11Look, Joe
10:12I've done a lot of living
10:13And I put all that into my first album
10:15And now they want me to come up
10:17With another album on demand
10:18And I
10:19I'm sorry
10:21There's nothing on me at the moment
10:24You can't do that, though
10:25You're just not trying
10:27You just have to go back in there and try
10:29You can do it
10:30I know you
10:31You don't know me
10:33You don't know me at all
10:34You know some article in the magazine
10:37Look
10:38You know this guy
10:41Well, let me tell you something
10:43This guy is finished
10:46He's dead
10:49He's dead
10:49You can tell your friends that, too
10:51You've
10:51You've pushed him too far
10:53And
10:54You've killed him
11:10Hey, Nick
11:12Look, he doesn't mean that you killed him personally
11:15He's just feeling a lot of pressure
11:17He's afraid that he's not going to be able to deliver to his fans
11:20And you're one of his biggest fans
11:21And you've got to believe that
11:24Well, I'm never going to believe in anybody again
11:27I mean, the one guy who I always thought was so perfect
11:29I felt so special because I actually knew him
11:33And all my friends think he's so great, but now I know
11:36He really isn't
11:39Sweetheart, do you think it's possible that maybe you're overreacting a little bit?
11:49Apparently not
11:51Please go away
11:54I'm inconsolable
12:05So, to recap
12:07As far as Nicole is concerned
12:09Malcolm is out
12:10And we're back in
12:11Now, I realize, of course, a bigger person
12:14Would feel some compassion for the man
12:17But, uh, I'm very petty and I have to laugh
12:21You want your daughter to worship you?
12:24Never happen
12:25Know why?
12:26You're a father
12:27You're around all the time
12:29She's seen you in your boxer shorts
12:33Face it
12:34It's your thankless task
12:35To put Humpty Dumpty back together again
12:40You're wrong
12:43About what?
12:45I don't wear boxer shorts
12:47I wear jockeys
12:52Me too
12:59I don't really want to know that
13:04Well, he's asleep
13:05She's depressed
13:06What do we do?
13:08We write a song
13:10Oh
13:12Oh, why do we do that?
13:14Follow me, Joe
13:15Malcolm needs a song
13:16Nicole needs Malcolm to have a song
13:18So what's missing?
13:19The song
13:19We provide that
13:20We write a song
13:21We sing it to her
13:22We say it's from him
13:23She feels great
13:25He's terrific
13:25We're nothing
13:26Where's the flaw?
13:29We don't write songs
13:30Why must you be so negative?
13:35This song is gold, Joe
13:37This is gold
13:37Platinum
13:39This is a platinum
13:40What comes after platinum?
13:41Plutonium
13:43This is plutonium
13:45Joey and Michael
13:46The White Album
13:50We rhymed holiday
13:51With what the collies say
13:55It's plutonium, baby
13:58Let's play it again
13:59Can we play it again?
13:59I'd like to play it again
14:00Do we have to?
14:01Yes, we have to
14:02Sound check
14:03Sound check
14:04Just one, two
14:05Hello
14:05One, two
14:06Hello, good evening
14:07One, two
14:10One
14:10One, two
14:15Everybody wanted to do the thing
14:24I see you down in the dumps
14:28Like a clown with the mumps
14:32But don't you be that way
14:34Because today is the day
14:38Stop being depressed
14:41And you can stop being depressed
14:48Give your blues a holiday
14:50Doolin, doolin, doolin
14:52That's what the happy collies say
14:54Do-wop, do-wop
14:56Stop being depressed
14:59Now tell your face to go get dressed
15:02Hey, baby
15:04Now put on that smile
15:06And slip into that grin
15:08Cause now it's time for you
15:10Get out of that lousy mood
15:12That you've been in
15:13There's a bunch of chelries
15:14Sitting in your life mode
15:15So take a bite of the fruit
15:17Nicole
15:19Nicole
15:20Nicole
15:22Woo!
15:23Woo!
15:24Woo!
15:25Woo!
15:26Woo!
15:28I want to play this for Nicole
15:29I just want to play for Nicole
15:30Hey, hey, hey
15:31Hey, wait, wait, wait
15:32Oh, man
15:33Oh, man
15:33You heard that?
15:35What are you two guys up to then?
15:37What did you think of the song?
15:37Don't ask him that
15:38Hey, you wouldn't have any spare material
15:40That I could use, would you?
15:41I told you
15:42This is a great song
15:43You see, I've been having this problem lately
15:45It's called No Inspiration
15:47I forgot
15:48You can't just sit down
15:49And write a good song, you know
15:51You can't?
15:53No, no, no
15:54It's got to come from a
15:56From a special place
15:57Yeah, like right here, right?
15:59Like here
16:00Among friends
16:02Where you can catch your breath again, you know
16:05Where you can find yourself
16:07Hey
16:10Welcome back
16:12Thanks, mate
16:13But
16:14But you did
16:14You liked the song, right?
16:17Loved it
16:19Yeah, just
16:20I'll tell you what
16:21Why don't you let me
16:22Just polish it up a bit?
16:24Whoa, whoa, whoa
16:25What do you mean polish?
16:29Well
16:31You know, polish
16:34Just want to polish it
16:35Yeah
16:35Yeah, well, that's
16:36That's why we did it
16:39Hey
16:41Thanks, mate
16:42You're a pal
16:44What a pal's for, huh?
16:50Great, Goofy
16:51You just gave him the plutonium
16:54Fine
16:54Fine
16:55Fine
16:59I don't want to talk to anybody, okay?
17:02It's not anybody
17:04Hi, Judge
17:05Come on out
17:07I don't feel like it right now
17:09Yes, you do
17:22What's going on?
17:27Hello, Soho
17:28It's great to be back
17:30You may have heard
17:31That I'd taken leave of my head
17:33Well, this is a vicious rumor
17:35And no longer true
17:38I'd like to kick off the set
17:39With a little song
17:40That goes out to a very special young lady
17:41I think she may be in the crowd tonight
17:44I believe I see her
17:45Nicole
17:47This song's for you
17:50You ready, Mr. Piano?
17:55I can remember
17:57The first time I gazed
17:58Into your eyes
18:02You looked at me and smiled
18:03Child, I went wild
18:05I was hypnotized
18:08Well, I'm still here at your command
18:12But I need you to understand
18:18Oh, Nicole
18:20Oh, Nicole
18:21Girl, you know
18:22I didn't mean to hurt you so
18:24Oh, Nicole
18:26Oh, Nicole
18:27Give me one more chance
18:29Baby, please don't
18:31Go, Nicole
18:34With the faces of strangers
18:37My only companions
18:38I was so alone
18:41How could I sing about love
18:43When I had no friend
18:45To call my own
18:48Well, I hope you can find
18:50And you wait free
18:51To please be that friend to me
18:57Oh, Nicole
18:59Oh, Nicole
19:01Good for you
19:02You can hurt your soul
19:04Oh, Nicole
19:06Oh, Nicole
19:08One more chance
19:09Baby, please don't
19:11Oh, Nicole
19:15Oh, Nicole
19:17Oh, Nicole
19:18Girl, you know
19:20I feel like it hurts you so
19:22Oh, Nicole
19:23Oh, Nicole
19:25Oh, Nicole
19:31Oh, Nicole
19:35Oh, Nicole
19:36Oh, Nicole
19:37Oh, Nicole
19:49I like that version better
19:52I'm taking this down to the studio right now
19:54I'll expect you there in 30 minutes, Malcolm
19:56Hey, thanks, Dennis
19:57Hey, by the way
19:58You're rehired
19:59I am?
20:01It must be Tuesday
20:05By the way, Mr. Taylor, Mr. Harris
20:09You've got a lovely daughter
20:19That was the best song I have ever heard in my life
20:23Nicole, as much as I like that look, don't
20:26What look?
20:27That one
20:28The one with the wide, adoring eyes that says, Malcolm, you can do no wrong
20:32Well, I can, Nicole
20:34And when I do
20:36I need a friend who'll understand
20:38And that's why I've come here, to be with my friends
20:43Friends?
20:45Friends
20:53Mission accomplished, huh?
20:54Yep, we're back to zilch
20:56We're nothing
20:57We don't exist
21:00Too bad
21:01Because if Nicole's dads were still here
21:04I'd offer them a rare moment of praise
21:06But they're not
21:10Too bad
21:13Before I go, I'd like you to know
21:14That the inspiration for that song
21:16And many of its actual lyrics
21:18Were contributed by my two co-writers
21:21And my dear mates
21:23Joey Slowhand Harris
21:25And Michael Rapmaster Taylor
21:30Well, I gotta be off
21:33Hey, Malcolm, now
21:34Now that you're leaving
21:35I gotta ask you a question
21:37When are you coming back?
21:39Well
21:40Rock and roll stars don't say goodbye
21:43They
21:43They just fade out
21:45After three and a half minutes
21:54You wrote a song with Malcolm?
21:57Yeah
22:00You didn't think your fathers were that talented, did you?
22:03As a matter of fact
22:03We wrote another plutonium song
22:05If I could just sing a few
22:06I don't think your fathers were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were
22:10that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you
22:10were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think
22:10you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you
22:13think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did
22:15you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented,
22:16did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that
22:17talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were
22:20that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think you
22:22were that talented, did you think you were that talented, did you think
22:22You
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