Goodness Gracious Me brought iconic British-Asian comedy to TV with hilarious sketches, unforgettable characters, and sharp cultural satire 😂🔥 From “Going for an English” to legendary family moments, the show became a comedy classic that still feels ahead of its time. A true gem of British television and South Asian humor 🇬🇧🇮🇳
#goodnessgraciousme #britishcomedy #asiancomedy #southasian #classiccomedy #ukcomedy #comedysketch #cultclassic #britishtv #funnyclips #comedyshow #90scomedy #satire #viralvideo #fyp #explorepage #legendarycomedy #retrohumor #tvclassics #desihumor #bbccomedy #iconicshows #comedygold #nostalgiatv #britishasian #dailymotion #comedymoments #sketchcomedy #retroshows #classicbritishtv
#goodnessgraciousme #britishcomedy #asiancomedy #southasian #classiccomedy #ukcomedy #comedysketch #cultclassic #britishtv #funnyclips #comedyshow #90scomedy #satire #viralvideo #fyp #explorepage #legendarycomedy #retrohumor #tvclassics #desihumor #bbccomedy #iconicshows #comedygold #nostalgiatv #britishasian #dailymotion #comedymoments #sketchcomedy #retroshows #classicbritishtv
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FunTranscript
00:25Good and gracious me!
00:32Bye, Mum. Bye, Dad. We're off.
00:34Oh, so you two lovers of somewhere romantic?
00:38She's going to the pictures.
00:39Oh, a romantic film?
00:41No, no, I think it's a comedy.
00:43Oh, good idea. You know, Raju, your mother and I saw a very funny film the other day.
00:49A very funny film. You must see it.
00:52Oh, right. What was it called?
00:53I can't remember, but it was very hilarious.
00:57It all takes place on a boat.
01:01And you see, there's a lot of these crazy people there.
01:04And they're all laughing and drinking and being very silly.
01:08And there's a lot of dancing and carrying on below deck.
01:12And just when the party gets really swinging, they...
01:22They hit an iceberg!
01:31And the whole bloody boat sinked.
01:35The funny thing is, there wasn't enough lifeboats to go around.
01:42And they're all crashing about in the water.
01:44Help! I can't swim!
01:46You're fine!
01:47Your mother and I laughed out loud.
01:50Oh, yes.
01:50With the cinema.
01:51Oh, that's how funny it was.
01:54That's Titanic, and it's not funny.
01:59Well, we liked it, didn't we?
02:01Yes!
02:03Yes!
02:04Yes!
02:05Yes!
02:08Yes!
02:09Yes!
02:09Yes!
02:10Yes!
02:12Good day.
02:13Welcome to Rav's Animal Hospital.
02:15I'm in downtown Karachi at the animal dispensary.
02:18And someone's had a terrible accident.
02:20Excuse me, mate.
02:21Can you tell us what happened?
02:22You see, I was sitting in my living room, and I saw this dog on my driveway sniffing around.
02:30So later, I went outside and reversed my car out, and I felt this bump.
02:36Is he dead?
02:37Well, the poor little fella looks in a bad way, but I think he'll survive.
02:43And now?
02:50The year is 1905.
02:52At the University of Cambridge are gathered the world's intellectual elite.
02:56Among them, a group of young men whose destiny is to lead their mother country to independence and beyond.
03:03Nehru and Jinnah, the Cambridge years.
03:06Ah, Mr. Nehru.
03:09Mr. Jinnah.
03:12Mr. Nehru, salam, salam, salam.
03:18Namaste.
03:20How do you do?
03:21How went last night's meeting?
03:24The meeting of the Congress All India Committee?
03:27The same?
03:28Mr. Jinnah, it is indeed unfortunate that you are unable to attend.
03:32It is my firm belief that our historians will remember this meeting as the first true stirrings of Indian independence.
03:38Then it was a success?
03:40Yes.
03:41And a total lager frenzy.
03:43Yes.
03:44Yes, although personally I never touched a drop.
03:47Because of your unimpeachable moral rectitude?
03:50Yes.
03:51Though some of our colleagues were completely shedded.
03:54That's bonkers, mate.
03:57Ah, here's young Gupta.
03:59Mr. Gupta, how go the revision for finals week?
04:02Mr. Nehru, Mr. Jinnah, I've done absolutely no revision, me.
04:06And I don't care.
04:08Mr. Because you're bonkers.
04:10Mr. Precisely.
04:13Mr. Oh dear.
04:27And to talk about the emerging intellectual middle class.
04:31Mr. Speaking of which, did you hear about the supper that we had in old Gandhi's rooms?
04:36Mr. Do, then.
04:38Mr. We were about to retire for a spot of billiards, when in walked the Nawab of Bhutan.
04:42Mr. Trousers around his ankles, traffic cone on his head, singing some ditty about four and twenty young women recently
04:49arrived from Inverness.
04:50Mr. And they talk about creating a nation state.
04:55Mr. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.
04:59Mr. I don't believe it, in it, Beena.
05:14Mr. Here comes that guy again, trying pathetically to catch our eye.
05:19Mr. Look, buddy, we are out on a date with two gorgeous single Asian men.
05:24Mr. Tell him we haven't made them up.
05:25Mr. Yeah, and we ain't made them up neither this time.
05:29Mr. And I know you can't help drooling over our babelicious bodies, right, but we are taking, innit?
05:35Mr. You girls gonna order a drink tonight, or what?
05:37Mr. Oh, sorry.
05:39Mr. Er, no, thanks. The guys are getting our drinks from the bar.
05:42Mr. Er, Beena, what do you mean the guys are getting our drinks? They didn't ask us what we wanted.
05:47Mr. Yeah, but you're gonna have a Malibu and creme de mon, like you always do, innit?
05:51Mr. That is not the point. They did not ask us. What does that say to you?
05:55Mr. They're two nice blokes who wanna buy us a drink, innit?
05:59Mr. No, man. They are trying to control us, innit?
06:02Mr. Oh.
06:02Mr. Look, it starts with a baby sham you don't want, right?
06:05Mr. And before you know it, you're pregnant and tied to a sink and he's off shagging somebody called Tracy.
06:10Mr. But these bodies are getting away with it in their dreams.
06:14Mr. You've been watching too much Jerry Springer, innit?
06:16Mr. Jerry, Jerry, anyway.
06:18Mr. See, Dev's last girlfriend was not called Tracy, she was called Amanda.
06:23Mr. Oh, great, Amanda. So now we are landed with two Asian guys who have had their fun with white
06:29women
06:29and wanna go out with two debt-y doormates in their dreams.
06:34Mr. Yeah, but you're wondering, man, he'd never been out with a girlie.
06:37Mr. In fact, he hasn't had a girlfriend for ages.
06:39Mr. Oh, great. So now I get the closet-gate Asian bloke that wants to marry me so he can
06:45lead a sordid double life beyond my back.
06:47Mr. Well, in his dreams.
06:50Mr. Um, me not.
06:50Mr. And I'm gonna tell him I don't like his jumper at all.
06:52Mr. They've gone.
06:55Mr. Just now, when you were shouting and foaming at the mouth.
06:59Mr. See, they're all bastards, innit?
07:02Mr. Oh.
07:03Mr. Breathe.
07:05Mr. Breathe.
07:07Mr. Breathe.
07:07Mr. Breathe.
07:09Mr. Breathe.
07:18Mr. Breathe.
07:31Mr. Nip.
07:34Mr. Nip.
07:45Mr. Nip.
07:48Mr. Nip.
07:48Mr. Nip.
07:57Mr. Nip.
08:01Mr. Nip.
08:01Mr. Nip.
08:02Mr. Nip.
08:03Mr. Nip.
08:20Mr. Nip.
08:21Mr. Nip.
08:30Mr. Nip.
08:31Mr. Nip.
08:35Mr. Nip.
08:36Mr. Nip.
08:36Mr. Nip.
08:37Mr. Nip.
08:37Mr. Nip.
08:38Mr. Nip.
08:38Mr. Nip.
08:38Mr. Nip.
08:39Mr. Nip.
08:39Mr. Nip.
08:39Mr. Nip.
08:40Mr. Nip.
08:40Mr. Nip.
08:41Mr. Nip.
08:42Mr. Nip.
08:42Mr. Nip.
08:43Mr. Nip.
08:44Mr. Nip.
08:45Mr. Nip.
08:48We are! Where's me tea and supper, you silly cow?
08:53Look, I call off a G. I've been busy.
08:57Here, watch it, or I'll divorce you.
09:00Anyway, what have you been up to?
09:02Doing shagging with the milkman.
09:04Oh, we are English.
09:08Quite right. Anyway, where's the bleeding kids?
09:11No idea. I haven't seen them for a couple of weeks.
09:14Let go, though, Bedlorn!
09:18Let's go!
09:19Chos, Victoria. Where you been?
09:22Get laid. Taking drugs.
09:26And what are you doing, your granddad's wheelchair piss off?
09:29I'm English, and I have no respect for the elders.
09:36Hey, yeah. Your granddad fought in the war against the Hitlers.
09:40Me?
09:41Hang on a minute, you disgusting old fart.
09:42What? Have you kids forgotten what day it is today?
09:45Is it the day you finally get a job?
09:49No, you cheeky cheeky.
09:51It's rent day, so be like regular English kids and pay up your little toe rags.
09:56I can't.
09:58And another thing.
09:59You better start looking for somewhere to live.
10:01Because when you're 16, you're out!
10:05Who's that?
10:06Some tart I was shagging when I should have been at your school careers open evening.
10:09When are you going to find yourself a bloke who'll get you up the duff and off me hands?
10:17Hey, uh, granddad's got a deal. I think he needs the medical attention.
10:23We can't afford it.
10:24But he might die!
10:25Good!
10:27We could do with having that room back.
10:30That's right. We're English. We think more of our pets than we do of our own parents.
10:38Ha! Ha!
10:40Hey! Granddad's died!
10:43Everyone's at a pub!
10:44Hooray!
10:47Hooray!
10:48Should we want more?
10:53Domination?
10:54Bit of S&M.
10:55Water sports?
10:57Hey, if you wanted water sports.
10:58why didn't you come to me I can get for you much cheaper it was a most tragic
11:16program very sad yes because don't you see he would have succeeded in his
11:22endeavors and made something of his life if it if it wasn't for this this this
11:39thank you ladies and gentlemen thank you for attending the launch of my new
11:44spiritual guidebook the Maharishi yogi's true path to enlightenment now as we are
11:50all aware the market for spiritual guidebooks is currently saturated by many
11:56charlatans people like Deepak Chopra Dalai Lama Delia Smith these people miss the
12:07very essence of Vedic teaching as summarized by the ancient Sanskrit dictum
12:29this is meaning the best things in life are free but you can keep them for
12:37the birds and bees I want money but my book is the only one that remains both
12:45faithful to the principles of Vedic teaching and also available in pop-up
12:49form I was first inspired to write this book after the astounding success of my
12:57first work the Maharishi's genealogy of contemporary moral Eastern philosophy
13:01later turned into the Hollywood blockbuster basic instinct in my new book I try to solve the problems of
13:12life in a stress-filled modern world now there are two paths to spiritual fulfillment I would recommend the hardback
13:21path priced 1899
13:25now as you all know my book is the center of some controversy there are
13:31those that disagree with my teachings those that are critical of my work
13:35especially chapter 29 where the guru meets the two Californian blondes in the
13:40jacuzzi to these skeptics I would like to quote an ancient Sanskrit proverb
13:59this is meaning come on I'm trying to sell some books here
14:12welcome to raps animal hospital I'm here in a waiting room
14:16at the new deli animal dispensary here with mr. Bhatia good eye hello who's
14:24this you brought along with you today he's a lovely little fella he's my
14:29cleaner
14:31seems to be in a bit of pain yes well you see he got run over oh it might how
14:37did
14:37that happen he spilt tea on my jacket so I pushed him under a bus
14:52I told you'd like pulp fiction Quentin Tarantino's a brilliant director yes it's
15:08so great okay I know what you're gonna say Uma Thurman is Indian because Uma is a
15:14Hindi name
15:15not just Thurman the other fellow dancing chap John
15:18to Walter
15:19Travandrum
15:19what
15:20ultimately John Travandrum Indian
15:22no
15:23come on yeah check him out in Saturday Night Fever huh
15:25white suit kipper tie big flares
15:33you can tell by the way he used his walk he's a Hindi man no time to talk
15:37dad and not just him all Hollywood superstars Indian what Hollywood golden
15:43couple Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman Indian originally Om Cruise and Nicole Kidda
15:49and not just them also Rupi Goldberg Robert Redfort Deli Moore Raja Moore blonde bombshell
15:59Buljeet Nielsen model turned actress Hindi Crawford rubbish you're just making it all up
16:06then how do you explain Shirley Temple
16:13as you can see by utilizing advanced yogic relaxation techniques I'm able to take my left arm over the back
16:22of my head and reach the green circle of the
16:25I can't believe my darling baby little girl is getting married tomorrow
16:37seems like only yesterday I was wiping up after you
16:41mum it was only yesterday I mean after being force fed 17 luddos you'd vomit too
16:48and tomorrow you will be stolen away from me
16:51dragged off by baying menfolk to another family far far away
16:56in Ilford it takes 20 minutes on the north circular please stop worrying it'll be fine
17:01oh Betty it's it's not the wedding I'm worried about it's uh afterwards you know when you both go home
17:10together and you have to perform your wifely duties
17:15oh my god you poor innocent child how are you going to cope
17:19mum Dinesh and I have been going out for eight years right eight years you kept him waiting all that
17:26time
17:26oh my god you'll be like a wild animal look mum it the thing is no no you know if
17:32they go without it for just one day terrible things start to happen
17:36they drive too fast everywhere they start fights mum where do you get these ideas from
17:41oh and if your father doesn't get any action for a week he's jumping me in hallways and begging for
17:48sadomasochistic domination look mum Dinesh and a bit of what sadomasochistic domination
17:58you know for the first few years you can cope with it you know four times a night the lunchtime
18:03knee tremblers etc etc and of course you get a bit of a rest when the babies come along
18:09sorry did you say four times a night no no no now it's down to two or three
18:16but um after forty years you want to say stop enough with the Ann Summer's catsuits and the
18:23vibrating eggs it's your woman a break vibrating eggs oh listen to me I know I don't need to tell
18:33you modern girls how to prolong a man's pleasure by biting down on the sensitive part
18:42sorry darling I just don't want you to go through what I
18:45I don't very little chance of that mum hello betty
18:53bedtime already
18:55goodbye betty
19:02mr. jinnah I quite clearly heard what our colleague said last night and you must
19:06concede that you are wrong I concede nothing mr. jinnah your obstinacy compounds the error
19:13no it doesn't
19:15ah here's young gupta he will be able to answer this question for us
19:19mr. gupta tell us what maharaja of rishipuri told mr. Nehru last night
19:24gentleman his answer was quite unambiguous he said fuzzy duck when what he should have said was
19:31ducky fuzz just after you left in walks in the barb of patan trousers around his ankle
19:38yes and a traffic corn on his head they talk about sovereign autonomy
19:52namaste shanti oh namaskar shushila cold today no brass bandar weather
20:02oh how's the family oh busy busy very busy you know they went this morning to florida on holiday
20:13so nice yours oh very busy they also went on holiday this morning spain oh so they didn't leave you
20:25a key
20:26either no but never mind plenty to do in the park you know
20:36old friends like bookends sharing a bench in the rain every day is the same does no bloody good to
20:49complain
20:50in town centers and parks are others like us
20:55in town centers and parks are others like us huddled in bunches not making the fuss
20:59growing old in the cold england's turned us all grey
21:03we were once independent now we're just in the way
21:10old friends like bookends eating pickles and prawn take on cold
21:16we let happy memories unfold when we had teeth and bladder control
21:25will you retire back to india is what we all said
21:29but our kids are still here and our friends are all dead
21:33the house we grew up in demolished last spring
21:37for bombay's new bronze of burger king
21:43old friends like bookends wondering where we call home
21:51where the heart is says the poem
21:54wolverhampton says my son
22:21old friends like bookends having a laugh in the park
22:29using bus pass after dark
22:33not caring who hears us fart
22:37we gate crash all weddings pretending we're lost
22:41we talk loud punjabi to piss people off
22:45we switch off our deaf aids when we want some peace
22:49being ignored sometimes means that you're free
22:53and when we're all gone there goes your history
22:59old friends so young at heart but such old friends
23:05so young at heart but such old friends
23:10old old friends
23:20and so we commit
23:21brave little jeffrey
23:23to the place where all the little hamsters go
23:26when they die
23:26is that heaven daddy
23:29no India
23:37tonight on the late review we'll be discussing the new production of king lear at the national theater
23:42joining me live in the studio are tony parsons columnist with the daily mirror
23:46the academic and writer germaine greer the poet and critic tom paulin and an elderly indian couple from slough
23:53so what could we say about king lear that hasn't been said before
23:57bloody funny
23:59he laughed out loud
24:02when he popped his eyes
24:06gonorrhea
24:08howling howling
24:09howling
24:09howling
24:11howling
24:11howling
24:14howling
24:15howling
24:16howling
24:25howling
24:28howling
24:29howling
24:31howling
24:34howling
24:53howling
24:55Glenda!
24:58Glenda!
24:58Good morning, Glenda.
24:59Glenda? That's a girl's name, tubby.
25:02Man, you got problems.
25:03I think we need to have a bit of a talk.
25:06Hey, don't shush me.
25:07This is delicate. How do I put this?
25:09It's about that bottom-touching thing.
25:11Quiet, Skippy!
25:12It's Skippinda, you dirty little arse fondling pervy bossy.
25:15I'm put up with you goosing me up at every opportunity.
25:18You know, once in a while, in private,
25:19after a few drinks, okay? But you need help.
25:21I can't come out with you now, Skipp.
25:24I'm doing your lessons.
25:25Yeah, pervert lessons, Glenda.
25:27My butthole is private property.
25:29Now get your fat arse off the chair and follow me.
25:31Oh, right. But it better be important,
25:34because if Dad finds out,
25:36I'll be in for it.
25:37Hey, he's another bum bandit.
25:39She's a very furry Jason.
25:40Hey, but why?
25:42Ah! Keep away from my bum!
25:46I truly don't...
25:47Keep away! You're getting too close.
25:49Hands off!
25:51There's a mobile arse clinic just ahead with specialist arse doctors.
25:54They'll be able to help you with your fluffy juff perversion thing.
25:59Come on!
26:01What's that noise, Skipp?
26:03It's the flying arse doctors, innit?
26:05Get yourself down there pronto, kid.
26:07See the specialists.
26:08He'll see you right.
26:11What are they doing out here?
26:12Yeah, sorting out tubby little buggers like you.
26:14Come on, let's get out and find out.
26:15Arse! Arse!
26:16You on your own, fatty.
26:18No one gonna experiment with my buttocks.
26:20I'm off to the pub.
26:20Couple of pints.
26:21Get some totty.
26:22You know.
26:23Skippy!
26:24Oh, totty!
26:24How did you get in front of me?
26:26Skippy, where are they?
26:28Where have I gone?
26:29Gone back to Uranus.
26:30You get it?
26:31Joe wouldn't go.
26:32He promised me another $2.
26:34Well, I got $2, but I mean, what's in it for me?
26:37You know.
26:37Hey, what are you doing?
26:38What are you doing?
26:39Hello?
26:40Yeah, daylight robbery.
26:41$2 for a lousy handjob.
26:45Okay, stop the car.
26:47I'm gonna be sick.
26:47Stop.
26:48Open the door.
26:48Quick.
26:49It's coming out.
26:50Open the door.
26:52Ah, that's better.
26:54Hey.
26:54Hey, don't touch.
26:55Don't touch.
26:57Not coming with you if you're gonna start doing all that nonsense.
27:00Now, if you can...
27:00Whoa!
27:00Oh, look at him.
27:01He's not in public.
27:02There's people watching and everything.
27:04Phew.
27:04I need a bloody drink.
27:07Good idea, sir.
27:08Yeah, gin and tonic, Ramlal.
27:09He don't touch the...
27:10Oh, come on.
27:12Let's all three go in here and we...
27:14Come on.
27:14Oh, not both of you.
27:15Yeah, you bloody lousy charlatan.
27:17Worst arse doctor ever.
27:19I'm reporting all of you to Ralph Bleeding Harris.
27:21A very personal friend of mine, Ralph.
27:23Army days.
27:24Hey, Skippy.
27:25Yeah, bye, wanker.
27:30You're welcome!
27:31Come on!
27:32Yes, that's the rest of the world.
27:35No, not the rest, we're gonna let you go.
27:40Ah, what?
27:42Yeah!
27:43No!
27:46But...
27:50Yeah!
27:52Back to 100, man.
27:53Yeah, go, go.
27:55Yeah!
27:56Yeah!
27:57Yeah!
27:59Yeah, yeah!
28:02Then we are agreed, gentlemen.
28:04It is time for us to move forward to meet our destiny
28:07and to show the waiting world
28:09that we are indeed ready
28:11to steer Mother India towards the independence.
28:21Good gracious me!
28:30Good gracious me!
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