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مسلسل Parenthood مترجم - Episode 5
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00:01So you're saying that you'll have a baby with me in three years?
00:03Yeah.
00:03Crosby, who is this old fella?
00:05I don't know.
00:05He, uh, one of the girls up front asked me to watch him.
00:08Are you sure he's yours?
00:09Because if he is, you have legal obligations, financial obligations.
00:12Max, you don't have to play baseball.
00:14Not after this season.
00:15I'm not having any fun.
00:17A.K.A. Steve Williams.
00:19They're Facebook official.
00:20Daddy, this is Steve.
00:21Uh, Mr. Braverman.
00:22It's, uh, it's really good to meet you, sir.
00:23What's up?
00:28Excuse me.
00:28Hi, do you know where room 112 is?
00:31Sarah Braverman.
00:32Uh, yeah, that's me.
00:33Hi, I'm Arnold Lee.
00:34My daughter Sylvia is an AP chem with Hattie.
00:37She raves about your daughter all the time.
00:39She says that she's a genius.
00:41Oh, you know what?
00:41Hattie's my niece, actually.
00:43Um, my daughter's Amber Holt.
00:45Oh.
00:47Oh.
00:48Well, nice to meet you.
00:55Look, these aren't in the blue bag,
00:56but these right here have the best salt-to-pepper ratio around.
01:00I don't want those.
01:00I want the ones in the blue bag.
01:02Any chance you save the old bag
01:03if you just buy these and dump them in there?
01:04Honey, you can taste the difference.
01:06I'm tired.
01:08Honey, honey, honey.
01:09Don't talk to them.
01:10Don't talk to them.
01:10Walk this way.
01:12Hank!
01:13Hey, how are you?
01:14Uh, doing what I can with these kids.
01:15Yeah?
01:16You left some big cleats to fill.
01:18Oh, I don't know about that.
01:20Look, uh, Adam, I heard about your, uh,
01:23you know, situation with Max,
01:25and we were talking, and about maybe, you know...
01:28I found him.
01:29Oh, good, honey.
01:30Oh, great, great.
01:30That's awesome.
01:32Maxo!
01:33Hey!
01:34We really miss you, big guy.
01:36We'd love to have you come back on the team, huh?
01:38What do you say?
01:39Oh, I don't think that's...
01:40Sure, he's not gonna...
01:41I'll go back on the team.
01:43All right.
01:44Can you bring it up top?
01:45Boom!
01:47Boom.
01:48Boom.
01:48We'll see it.
01:48Boom, yeah, see ya.
01:49Bye.
01:59Is there any chance that's nicotine gum?
02:02Uh, good eye.
02:04Yeah, can I?
02:05Do you mind?
02:05Of course, yes.
02:06It's your lucky day, sure.
02:08Thanks.
02:08I, uh, I quit smoking seven years ago,
02:10but the gum, I can't give up.
02:12Ten years.
02:12Oh.
02:15You know, nothing like college prep day
02:17to get me Jones in for nicotine.
02:19I know, but standing under the breezeway
02:22chewing gum, you know,
02:23doesn't really have that, like, rebel feel.
02:25Well, you haven't seen me blow a bubble yet.
02:26Whoa.
02:27Yeah, it's pretty cool.
02:28So you have kids here, huh?
02:30Did you have them when you were 12?
02:32No, I, um, I work here.
02:35I'm Mark Sear, 11th grade English.
02:38Ooh, I think I just gave nicotine gum
02:41to my daughter's teacher, Amber.
02:44Amber Holt?
02:45Sorry.
02:46We're working on the eye-rolling attitude.
02:49There's no eye-rolling.
02:50She's, uh...
02:52Amber's actually one of my most engaged students.
02:55Really?
02:56Yes.
02:57What are the rest of them like?
02:58They're a bunch of drug-addled losers.
02:59Glazed eyes.
03:00No, no, they're a good group of kids.
03:02You, though, you have to see the paper
03:03that she wrote on The Sound and the Fury.
03:05You will be blown away.
03:07Are you kidding?
03:08No, it's really, really good.
03:09Ah.
03:15Wow.
03:16Yeah.
03:17I should probably go, though,
03:19before the principal bus me.
03:21Okay.
03:21All right, thank you so much for the gun.
03:23Nice to meet you.
03:24Oh, please be careful of the door.
03:26Ha, ha.
03:31Oh, all hail the conquering hero.
03:34Hi, Mommy.
03:35Hi, Sweet Pea.
03:37Wow, that smells delicious, babe.
03:40Mm-hmm.
03:41Hey, I thought you had a play date with Harmony today.
03:43Yeah, she's in my room.
03:45We're playing the princess and the maid.
03:47How do you play?
03:47Well, Harmony's the princess and I'm the maid.
03:50Oh.
03:51Oh, wow.
03:53How do you get to choose who's the princess and who's the maid?
03:56Well, Harmony's always the princess.
03:59And you're always the maid?
04:01No.
04:01Sometimes I'm the cook or the gardener.
04:04Oh, and sometimes I'm the royal dresser.
04:09Oh, wow.
04:11Sweetie.
04:12Princess Harmony needs something.
04:14I have to go.
04:20Don't look at me.
04:21I'm always the cook.
04:23Hmm.
04:24The good news is you're in very good health.
04:27Blood work looks fine.
04:28Low blood pressure.
04:29If she works out all the times.
04:32Well, the only thing I'm concerned about are the slightly elevated FSH levels.
04:35FSH?
04:37Follicle stimulating hormone.
04:38The higher the level, the more difficulty we have in ovulating.
04:41Am I infertile?
04:42No, no, no.
04:43Nothing like that.
04:44Okay, but I can still get pregnant within three years?
04:46In three years?
04:47Well, given your FSH levels and the real decline in fertility that occurs between 34 and 37,
04:53I suggest you think about moving your timetable up.
04:55Mm-hmm.
04:56By how much?
04:58Now.
04:59I think now would be a good time for us to start.
05:02You think now would be a good time?
05:12When we were young, we were small, but we didn't know it.
05:18Ah, when you were hurt, you would smile, so you didn't show it.
05:28Ah, I, can't believe you're mine.
05:43Can't believe you're mine.
05:48Can't believe you're mine.
05:57Hey, Adam, Max's shirt's hanging out.
06:00Yeah, it's okay, Mom.
06:02Yeah, why doesn't somebody tuck it back in?
06:04Mom, it's fine.
06:05He's fine.
06:06Better than my kid.
06:07I have to tell him ten times a day to tie his laces.
06:10Huh.
06:10Listen, by the way, Adam, if you guys need anything,
06:14help with meals, rides to school, anything.
06:18Thanks, Scott.
06:19Still feed and clothe ourselves.
06:21What a jackass.
06:26Can I go over to Steve's house tonight?
06:27Because Marjorie and Dale are making personal pizzas.
06:30No, no, we're going over to Grandma and Grandpa's for dinner.
06:33You know that.
06:33Well, he can join us.
06:34Who?
06:35I don't think it's going to be.
06:35That's okay, you don't have to say that.
06:37It's a done deal.
06:45Call it, Max.
06:46Okay, okay, okay.
06:46I got it.
06:47Hey!
06:48Call it, Max.
06:49Hey, hey!
06:52It's okay, Max.
06:53You should have to stand there.
06:54That's what Coach said.
06:59It's okay.
07:01Good try!
07:03Oh, no one told you.
07:05I like mine Julian with the fancy edges.
07:07Hey, did you take the test?
07:08The test?
07:09The paternity test?
07:10That one?
07:11Oh, right, right.
07:12Okay, did you at least tell Katie about Jabbar?
07:14No, it's a bad time for her.
07:16Her follicles are overstimulated.
07:19Adam, you knew about this whole Jabbar thing?
07:21You didn't tell him to get a paternity test?
07:24It's his life.
07:25I figured he'd get around to it when he was ready.
07:26But he's a child, so...
07:27She makes a really good point, Adam.
07:29You might have dropped the ball on this one.
07:31Crosby, I'm serious.
07:33I'm really...
07:34You have to get the test.
07:37Yes.
07:38There are serious financial and legal ramifications.
07:43You know, sometimes you sound so much like a lawyer.
07:47The water's coming.
07:48So now you go under the arch.
07:50Okay, so turn right and go under this arch,
07:52and the water's coming, so...
07:53Hey, Max.
07:53Watch out, he's gonna blast you.
07:55Yo, Max!
07:56You can win.
07:56Hey, Max, what do you say we get a little practice in before dinner?
07:59Make sure you're ready.
07:59The next time a pop-up comes your way.
08:01He's right behind you.
08:02Uh, do you have an extra glove?
08:04Yeah, you can borrow mine.
08:06Uh, hey, Max, want to go play baseball?
08:08Cool.
08:08All right.
08:14All right, remember, two hands, Max.
08:17You can get it.
08:18All right.
08:21Throw it over to Drew.
08:24All right, you want to stay in front of the ball, Drew?
08:26All right, got it, got it.
08:30You got a good arm.
08:31Oh, thanks.
08:33All right, remember, two hands, Max.
08:38Two hands, Max, two hands.
08:39I know!
08:40All right.
08:41Hey, hey, Max, come here.
08:42Throw me the ball.
08:44Watch, you.
08:45See?
08:46When it goes into the glove, put your hand over it,
08:48so that it stays in the glove.
08:49All right?
08:50Okay.
08:50All right?
08:51Here we go.
08:55Like that?
08:56Just like that, Max.
08:58Just like that.
08:59Perfect.
09:00Hi, honey.
09:01Hey.
09:02Hi, Drew.
09:11You know, I thought it was a loser before he started dating Abby.
09:45Oh, Amber.
09:46What is it?
09:48Very good.
09:49Camille?
09:50Camille?
09:51It took me two years to call him that.
09:52I still can't.
09:53Can I call him Camille?
09:54No.
09:55He's a keeper, huh?
09:56Hey, Cammie.
09:57Cam, Cam, can we get a little vanilla ice cream,
09:59go a la mode on this crisp?
10:01I think he's sweet.
10:03He seems like a nice guy.
10:04Yeah.
10:05He does.
10:05He's cute.
10:06Definitely cute.
10:07He's cute.
10:07He's really cute.
10:08Isn't he?
10:09No.
10:10No, no, no, no, no.
10:10It's sick, okay?
10:12She looks at him like some sort of doe-eyed Disney character.
10:14Yeah, dude, that's what teenage girls look like when they're in love.
10:17She's not in love.
10:17Yeah, well, you're a moron.
10:18Oh, ouch.
10:20Do you remember Sarah with Seth when she first met him?
10:22Oh, my God.
10:23Oh, I just loved your cover of In Your Eyes.
10:25Your solo totally kicked ass.
10:27The hair flip.
10:28Yes.
10:29No, it's a flip.
10:30It's a four-eye.
10:30Camille, this crisp is so delicious.
10:32Is there nutmeg in it?
10:33He's just such a little...
10:34Little what?
10:35You know, seriously, if just one girl had actually had a crush on you, you wouldn't be freaking
10:40out.
10:40I did.
10:41Well, Crosby, you seem to forget about Lisa Rainford, who stalked me my entire junior year.
10:47Who's that?
10:47I remember her sister, Judy, who I snuck into the merry-go-round with at Tilden Park.
10:51Oh, man, what a party.
10:53You hooked up in the merry-go-round?
10:55Yeah, I hooked up on the merry-go-round.
10:57How could you focus?
10:57Weren't you afraid of getting...
10:58Wait a minute.
10:59You didn't hook up in the merry-go-round?
11:02Everybody hooked up in the merry-go-round, even Adam.
11:04What?
11:05Okay, well, my fear of jail outweighed my desire to hook up in a spinning cup.
11:08What are you saying?
11:08I squandered my youth?
11:09I was just a rule follower?
11:11I was just studying for stupid tests?
11:12You didn't say that, but I agree with that.
11:14I was just saying, it was a good place to hook up.
11:16Amber's a really good writer.
11:17Really?
11:18Yeah.
11:18Yeah, you didn't read this?
11:20No.
11:20I just took the A at face value.
11:22The pivotal character, Caddy, is seen only through the gaze of her brothers, and only in silhouette,
11:26running, vanishing, forever elusive, forever out of reach, a reflection of their desires.
11:32That was nice.
11:33Yeah, you like that?
11:33Whitman-esque.
11:35Gentle breeze.
11:36Wait a minute.
11:38This is not Amber's paper.
11:40This is my paper, from high school.
11:43Amber copied my paper.
11:44What?
11:48That's impossible.
11:50She got an A.
11:50I copied the same paper, three years later.
11:53Bitch.
11:54All right, I give it a...
11:55Hello?
11:56Wake up.
11:57Wake up.
11:58Look what I found in the attic.
12:00Oh, it's my old paper, on the sound and the fury.
12:04Are you kidding me with this?
12:06I'm sorry.
12:06I'm sorry.
12:07It's just that the book was so confusing, and I just found that.
12:12It was just laying there, and Mr. Sears really, really hard to...
12:15Well, I can only imagine, then, what his reaction is going to be when I tell him that you did
12:19not write this paper.
12:20Wait, what?
12:21No, no, no.
12:22You can't tell him.
12:23Can't you just punish me, please?
12:25No, I can't punish you, because I ran out of good punishments for you in Fresno.
12:28We'll have to see what he comes up with.
12:30Good night.
12:31Wait, but...
12:39Hi there.
12:40Hey.
12:41Thank you so much.
12:42I just needed to, um, talk to you today about Amber's paper.
12:46Oh, cool.
12:47I'm glad you read it.
12:48Yeah.
12:49Oh, yeah, I read it.
12:50That's one of the most original, insightful papers I've ever read.
12:54Really?
12:54Yeah, I mean, what she wrote about, um, Caddy's evolution from a girl who loved climbing trees
13:01to promiscuous teen, it was really moving.
13:03You didn't find it, uh, over the top or misguided, like, another teacher might?
13:08No, no, I mean, I, I, well, I love it when my students think outside the box, it's, it's
13:13what makes the whole thing worth it.
13:16That and the free cafeteria food.
13:18God, is that good?
13:19It's so good.
13:19With a ladle?
13:20I eat all my food out of ladles.
13:23You know, there, there aren't that many parents that take this kind of interest, so.
13:27No wonder Amber's so special.
13:28She obviously gets it from you.
13:32Um, well, look, uh, college applications are right around the corner, and, and if, uh,
13:39for what it's worth, I'd love to write her a recommendation.
13:41I mean, really?
13:43Yeah.
13:44Think she could go to college?
13:45Yeah, no question.
13:48Wow.
13:49Is there anything else you want to talk to me about?
13:54No.
13:55Well, nice to see you.
13:56Nice to see you.
13:57Oh, gosh.
13:58I, uh, am late for work.
14:01Okay.
14:02So, we'll be going there.
14:05I, I'm a bartender at Whiskey Mike's, and why, I, why am I telling you that?
14:10I guess, you know what?
14:11I'm trying to impress you.
14:12I, it, it worked.
14:13Okay.
14:14I'll see you around, sir.
14:14I hope so.
14:15I mean, okay, bye.
14:17Oh, can I try some?
14:19Sure, sweetie.
14:23Hey, you know what I was thinking?
14:24Next time you and Harmony have a play date, you should be the princess.
14:28But I don't even want to be the princess.
14:31Well, you've never tried it.
14:34You're going to love it.
14:36And you know, I bet you Harmony would love to have a little break, too.
14:42Okay, but I might kind of forget.
14:46Why don't we come up with a code word, all right, to help you remember?
14:50Okay.
14:51Yeah.
14:52How about, um, tiara?
14:56Okay.
14:57Tiara.
15:00Good.
15:01Hey, kiddo.
15:03What are you reading about?
15:04Stink bugs.
15:06Great.
15:07Well, what do you say we head outside and toss the ball around a little bit?
15:11No, thanks.
15:18Hello.
15:19Oh, uh, hey, Adam.
15:20It's me, Drew.
15:21Oh, Drew, hi.
15:22Hey, um, yeah, I just wanted to let you know you left your baseball gear here yesterday,
15:27so...
15:27Oh, okay.
15:28I'll get it next time I come over.
15:29Yeah.
15:30Uh, well, also, I mean, if you want to practice again, uh, today I'm free.
15:37Oh, okay.
15:38Uh, hey, Max.
15:40It's Drew.
15:41Who wants to know if you want to play some ball?
15:43Sure.
15:46All right, Drew, sounds like we've got a plan.
15:48All right, yeah.
15:49Yeah, bye.
15:53Ready?
15:56Ow.
15:59All right, ready?
16:01All right, keep that glove down now, all right?
16:03Yeah.
16:03All right, remember to keep those knees bent now.
16:05Keep that glove down.
16:08Get it!
16:09Get it!
16:09Come on, Max.
16:11All right.
16:12Can I go get a drink of water?
16:13Yeah, just hustle back, okay?
16:17All right, Drew, you ready?
16:18All right, are you ready?
16:20What?
16:20Yeah.
16:21All right, let's see what you got.
16:24All right, pretend that didn't happen, Drew.
16:25What was that?
16:26Look away.
16:27Pretend that didn't happen, buddy.
16:31All right!
16:32That's not talking about good stuff.
16:34Did you see that?
16:36Are you ready?
16:37Let's see what you got.
16:38Let's see what you got.
16:40Get under it.
16:42Yeah!
16:42Nice!
16:44Come on.
16:47Hey, you.
16:48Hey.
16:48Just wondering why you didn't come into work today.
17:19Oh, uh, they canceled the session.
17:20You know, we're in a good place, right?
17:25Yeah, we are.
17:26And I know that's not our deal, which I will honor.
17:32But there's really nothing holding us back from starting right now.
17:36So, if you're willing, so am I.
17:47Well, what did he say?
17:49Was he mad?
17:49Was he upset?
17:50Was he sad?
17:52Well, what happened?
17:55I didn't tell him.
17:57Because he's so cool, right?
17:58No, not because he's so cool.
18:00Because he believes in you.
18:01And for some stupid reason, so do I.
18:05You better not let us down.
18:07I totally won't.
18:07You owe me a paper on the sound and the fury.
18:10Wait.
18:10And it better be original and insightful and moving.
18:14Hey.
18:16Hope you don't mind to borrow Drew for a little while.
18:17Hey, that's okay.
18:19Hey, Drew, we'll see you tomorrow at the ballpark.
18:20A little batting practice?
18:21Yep.
18:22Here.
18:25Look, it's yours.
18:27Well, just take good care of it.
18:28Keep it oiled.
18:32I'll see you tomorrow.
18:34Bye, Drew.
18:35Thanks.
18:36Bye.
18:41Okay, okay.
18:50Hey.
18:50Hey.
18:51Um, Jabbar is actually out at a sleepover right now.
18:57Well, I actually came to talk to you, so.
19:00Oh, okay.
19:01Um, I want to get a paternity test, you know, for Jabbar.
19:08What?
19:09Well, I'm just, I'm trying to make some big life decisions, and, uh, my little sister, who
19:13acts like she's older than me, but isn't, anyway, she's a lawyer, and she says that I
19:19should know for sure.
19:22So you think I'm lying to you, like, you know, I'm lying to you.
19:23No, no, no, no, no, no.
19:24I just need to know exactly what my, um, what does she say?
19:28Exactly what my responsibilities are financially and legally speaking.
19:33I didn't introduce you to him to try and hit you up for money or to pull some scam or
19:39whatever
19:39it is you and your sister think I'm up to.
19:42I just wanted my son to know his father.
19:44That's all.
19:45Yeah, I don't, listen, I, um, this was a mistake.
19:49Yeah, it was.
19:50Yeah, can we just rewind and forget about this house?
19:52No, you know what?
19:52Actually, you just need to go, okay?
19:54Okay, all right.
19:55Hey, wait, Jabara and I, are Jabara and I still on for the zoo tomorrow?
20:01I don't think so.
20:03You don't think so?
20:05All right, that was, that was great.
20:23I don't know, it's so random.
20:26Hey, Hattie.
20:27Mom.
20:28Mom.
20:29Whoa, Christina, looking good.
20:32Hey, Steve.
20:33Um, you know what?
20:34Hattie has to log off the computer.
20:36Oh, yeah, no problem.
20:37Uh, TTYL.
20:40You know the rule, no computer after 10.
20:42No, actually, you guys said the phone.
20:44I don't think that the Braverman Taliban has outlawed the computer.
20:47Okay, whatever.
20:49You broke the spirit of the rule, of the phone, with the computer.
20:52Whatever.
20:54Hattie, do not walk away from me when I'm talking to you.
20:57What's going on?
20:58You know what?
20:58Maybe you guys could learn a few parenting tips from Steve's parents.
21:01Rule number one being give your kids just a little bit of privacy.
21:06Hey, you know what, Hattie?
21:09You all right?
21:09No, I'm not.
21:10I hate Steve's parents.
21:12I hate them.
21:15Yeah, me too.
21:17Hey, did you talk to Jasmine about the paternity test?
21:19Hey, yeah, I did.
21:21And, man, it went great.
21:22Good.
21:23You want me to set up an appointment with my guy for you and Jabbar?
21:25Oh, no, no, no.
21:26You don't have to go to all that trouble.
21:28Because thanks to you telling me how to live my life, Jasmine now thinks I'm a giant jackass
21:32and doesn't want me anywhere near Jabbar.
21:33Oh, and Katie's going off the pill tomorrow, too, so that's great news.
21:37Wow.
21:38Well, I don't know how all of that is exactly my fault, but don't you think that that's suspicious?
21:42That Jasmine freaked out when you brought up the test?
21:45Yeah, or maybe it's because I basically called her a liar.
21:48You just want to know the truth.
21:50Yeah, and she said I was the father.
21:51And then refuse to let you corroborate that.
21:54Corroborate?
21:55Did you just really use that word in a normal conversation?
21:57Cross, just find something that has Jabbar's DNA on it.
22:01Oh, come on.
22:02Just find a comb with a few strands of hair, a tissue, a cup he drank out of, all right?
22:08A sample of saliva or hair, and my guy will run the test.
22:14And then we know for sure?
22:17And then you'll know for sure.
22:19And the longer you wait, the harder it's going to be to find out, no matter which way it goes.
22:27Hot roast.
22:28Just so you know, today, on me.
22:33Break a decades-old tradition?
22:35Why start now?
22:35I'm trying to be nice, because you're being so nice about Drew.
22:39Are you kidding me?
22:39I should be thanking you.
22:40He's a great kid.
22:41Seriously.
22:44You're welcome.
22:46Say what, if you really want to thank me, you can help me figure out what to do about Yo
22:49-Yo and Hattie.
22:50She's constantly touching her.
22:51Ugh, well, I don't know.
22:52Don't ask me.
22:53Amber just makes out in a car like a normal teenager.
22:55I swear, this kid's got like eight hands.
22:57Well, maybe it's a compliment.
22:58You know, he's showing you how comfortable he feels around you.
23:00Well, that is exactly the opposite of how I want him to feel.
23:03He's like gropey-groperson.
23:05Hey, maybe the more they do it in public, the less they do it in private.
23:09It's just a theory.
23:10That's not helping.
23:10Hey, where's Crosby?
23:11I keep calling him.
23:12He doesn't call me back.
23:13I don't know.
23:14I'm just busy doing Crosby stuff, I guess.
23:16Like what?
23:18There's nothing going on.
23:19You're the worst liar.
23:20All right, look.
23:22This is big news, okay?
23:25Crosby has a son.
23:27Shut up.
23:28I thought you were actually telling me something.
23:29I'm serious.
23:29Listen to me.
23:30He has a five-year-old boy named Jabbar.
23:34There's no way you could make up that name.
23:35I'm serious.
23:35He has a little boy, okay?
23:36Since when?
23:37Since five years ago.
23:38No, since when have you known?
23:39I don't know.
23:40A couple weeks.
23:40A couple weeks?
23:41Don't make it about the fact that you didn't know.
23:43How could you keep that from me?
23:44You're the worst liar in the family.
23:46He asked me not to tell anybody.
23:48And you actually did that?
23:50I can't believe you've known this.
23:51Get over it.
23:52You know now.
23:53I can't believe you didn't tell me.
23:54Don't hit me.
23:56And I got the organic kiwis.
23:58Harmony won't eat the conventionally grown ones.
24:01Oh.
24:04Pupacanite juice?
24:04Oh, no thanks.
24:05I'm fine.
24:06Sydney.
24:07Tiara.
24:12Um, Harmony, can I try to be the princess this time?
24:17But I'm always the princess.
24:22But maybe I can try being the princess this time.
24:26Okay.
24:29What do you want to do?
24:32I don't know.
24:33Maybe you want to tell your subjects there's a ball.
24:36Um, there's going to be a ball.
24:38I don't want to go to a ball.
24:40Balls are boring.
24:41Yeah, I thought so too.
24:43Hey, do you know what?
24:44I think the maid's really a queen who's been working undercover.
24:48And now she's staging a coup.
24:51How do you know what a coup is?
24:52My mom told me that's what happened in the timeline when everyone got tired of the king.
24:56She was fascinated by Southeast Asia.
24:59She cooped me, Mommy, and I didn't even want to be the princess.
25:02It's okay, sweetie.
25:03I know.
25:04I know.
25:05We can't make our children into people they're not.
25:07Thanks.
25:08That's very Buddhist.
25:12Hey, has anybody seen the bat?
25:16What's up, Adam?
25:18We're just watching a movie.
25:19Oh.
25:20Well, don't you guys have any homework to do?
25:24Nope.
25:25All done.
25:27Okay.
25:29Hey, have either of you seen a baseball here on the sofa?
25:32No.
25:33You sure?
25:33I can swear.
25:34Dad, what are you doing?
25:35I'm sorry.
25:37You can't play baseball without the ball.
25:40So, I just can't find it.
25:42I guess I must have left it in the car.
25:44Hmm.
25:45So.
25:50All right, Max.
25:52Let's get in the car.
25:52It's time to go play some ball.
25:54But today is Saturday.
25:56Uh-huh.
25:57You promised me last week that we could go to Yogurtland on Saturday.
26:00Well, today we were working on our batting with Drew.
26:03But it's Saturday.
26:04Yeah, I know.
26:05We're supposed to go today.
26:06You said we were going to Yogurtland on Saturday.
26:09Listen, Max, we can go after.
26:11They're going to be closed.
26:12Look, Max.
26:13Okay, look.
26:13If you can just hold off the telephone.
26:14You said we were going today.
26:16You said we were going to Yogurtland on Saturday.
26:19Hey, Adam, if you want, I could totally take him.
26:26I'll take him.
26:29All right, Max, come on.
26:30Let's, uh, let's go to Yogurtland.
26:33Come on.
26:34Christina?
26:45Hey.
26:46Hey, Drew, it's Uncle Adam.
26:47It's not.
26:48We're not going to be able to make practice today.
26:49I'm sorry.
26:51Oh, yeah, okay.
26:52I promised Max we were going to have Yogurt today.
26:55It's a long story.
26:56Dad!
26:56Yeah, it's fine.
26:57We can just stop.
26:57You're passing it, Dad!
26:58I know.
26:58I have to park.
27:00You just missed a spot, Dad.
27:01Right there.
27:02Drew, I've got to go.
27:03Right there!
27:03I'm going to have to call you later.
27:13Hello.
27:15Hello.
27:16How are you?
27:17Great.
27:18Glad you could make it.
27:19Oh, I passed up an opportunity for free pancakes?
27:21Are you crazy?
27:22Well, I don't know about that.
27:24Wait, you're reneging already on the pancakes?
27:26We'll just see.
27:28Well, let me see.
27:29I'll tell you.
27:30What's new with you?
27:32Nothing.
27:33Nothing?
27:34Hmm.
27:37Oh, my God.
27:39Julia told you that I have a son.
27:41Julia knows?
27:42Adam told you?
27:43Julia knows?
27:44I'm the last to know?
27:46I mean...
27:47I'm sorry, okay?
27:49I've just...
27:49It's kind of a major situation and, I don't know, a bit of a conundrum.
27:53You're right.
27:53Normally, I would tell you.
27:55I'm sorry.
27:56I'm sorry.
27:57Congratulations.
27:58I mean, are you...
28:00Is it a congratulations?
28:01Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
28:02Yeah.
28:02I mean, at first, no, but...
28:04Yeah.
28:05Yeah, I like him.
28:05You do like him.
28:06Yeah, you will, too.
28:07That's lucky.
28:08I know.
28:08Well, he could have been a dud.
28:11That's amazing.
28:12Yeah.
28:12What's he like?
28:13Um, he's really sweet, and he's kind of quiet, and he's got a really cute smile, and he's
28:21got really cute curly hair.
28:23I know.
28:24It's the worst.
28:27Yeah.
28:28Did you tell Katie?
28:29Mm.
28:29No.
28:29No?
28:30No.
28:31What about the can of sperm and Katie and...
28:33No, you've got to tell her.
28:34You're all grown up now.
28:35Yeah, there's no canister of sperm anymore.
28:37She wants my kid, like, now.
28:39Then you're really going to have to tell her.
28:41Mm.
28:43I don't know.
28:43I don't know.
28:44You guys are talking about having a child, and you have one already.
28:47You have to tell her.
28:48Look, what if I tell her, and then she doesn't want anything to do with me?
28:53You've got to leave that up to her, you know?
28:55You have to do the right thing.
28:58I don't really want these anywhere.
29:03One chocolate with only yellow M&M's.
29:06What?
29:06And one nonfat, sugar-free Heath bar with extra Oreo.
29:11Yes, I am fully aware of the irony of my order, honey.
29:14Don't make fun.
29:15You're telling me that you seriously just didn't like the movie?
29:18I mean, it shouldn't be called love, actually.
29:19It should be called lame, actually.
29:21There's just a bunch of people gazing at each other long, Lee.
29:23It was totally romantic.
29:25No, it was totally superficial.
29:28I can't believe you couldn't see that.
29:29I can't believe that you're just being such a jerk right now.
29:33Hey.
29:33Whoa, really?
29:33I'm a jerk?
29:34How am I being a jerk by having my own opinion?
29:36My bad.
29:38Okay.
29:39You know what?
29:40You're bad?
29:40You can leave.
29:43Fine.
29:44Fine.
29:49Hattie, you all right?
29:52Yeah.
29:53Um, we're just, um, he, he just, he's just not who I thought he was.
30:03Oh, Hattie.
30:09Crap.
30:10This might be the best moment of my life.
30:15You're rotten.
30:18So how did Operation Dethrone Harmony go?
30:21It was a disaster.
30:23Yeah?
30:24Harmony wouldn't abdicate?
30:25No, Sidney hated being the princess.
30:27Well, there's nothing wrong with staying a member of the proletariat.
30:30It's my fault, too.
30:31I made her do it.
30:33I'm such a control freak, aren't I?
30:37All right, this is where you say no, you're not.
30:38You were just trying to teach your daughter to stand up for herself.
30:41Does telling me exactly what I should say make you feel like less of a control freak?
30:45All right, fine.
30:46Fine.
30:47This is who I am.
30:48I am going to accept it.
30:49I'm a control freak.
30:50I don't do anything spontaneous like hook up on the merry-go-round in Tilden Park.
30:53No, that's still bothering you?
30:55No, it's...
30:55Oh, come on.
30:56I'm not.
30:57Come on, you're very crazy.
30:59You do crazy stuff.
31:00I do?
31:01Yes, yes.
31:03We're very wild.
31:04We went on that river rafting trip.
31:07Remember there were rapids?
31:08There weren't rapids?
31:10There weren't rapids, but there was a current, you know?
31:13There was a very strong current.
31:16I'm going to go check for a pulse.
31:18Come on.
31:19No.
31:20We went on a parasailing trip for our honeymoon.
31:23That was...
31:24Well, I went on it, but you were right on the shore, cheering me on.
31:32No thanks.
31:33I got it.
31:34You know, if you're going to make me read this incomprehensible book, the least you could
31:37do would be to ask Luke Skywalker to turn down the volume.
31:41What are you doing here?
31:42I thought you were playing ball with Uncle Adam.
31:45Yeah, he canceled.
31:46I don't know.
31:47He had to take Maxie at ice cream or something.
31:50I don't know.
31:51Ice cream?
31:53What do you mean?
31:54You guys had a plan.
31:56Yeah.
31:56I don't know.
32:08Well, what about the environmental implications of dumping this much estrogen into the bay?
32:13Don't worry.
32:14It's very low dosage.
32:15Okay.
32:17Goodbye to all the devices and barriers and hormones that I've been using all these years
32:24to avoid getting pregnant.
32:26And hello to, cross my fingers, I hope I'm not jinxing anything, a little mini Katie Crosby
32:34being.
32:35Um, listen, before you throw this into the bay and sterilize all the fish, I gotta tell you
32:41something, I have a son.
32:46What?
32:47I have, I have, I have a son.
32:49I had a fling five and a half years ago with his mother and a month and a half ago,
32:53she moved
32:54back to Berkeley and introduced me to him.
32:57His name's Jabbar.
33:01Um, wow.
33:02I'm really sorry I didn't tell you about it.
33:03You know, I was just trying to get to know him and I didn't know when the right time.
33:07Was this the little boy that you brought to the studio?
33:10Yes, that was him.
33:15You didn't introduce him to me.
33:18No, I, I did not.
33:20I didn't introduce him to you.
33:21You know, it was, it was confusing.
33:23I don't know what I'm sure.
33:23Well, I'm sure it was confusing, but you've also been sneaking around and hiding him and,
33:28and keeping him from me for over a month.
33:31I'm sorry if I didn't tell you right off the bat, but you know, you've been a little bit
33:34psycho with this whole baby thing.
33:35Oh, psycho.
33:35That's what you call wanting to have a baby is because I thought that was something that
33:38we both really wanted.
33:41I didn't mean to say.
33:43No, you know, I can't keep pushing you.
33:45It's not fair to either of us.
33:55You can't answer the question why you blew Drew off?
33:58Well, it's not that simple, Sarah.
34:00It's not that hard, Adam.
34:01You said you'd meet him at the baseball diamond.
34:03Just meet him at the baseball diamond.
34:04Look, at some point in the distant past, I had promised Max that I would take him to
34:09yogurt land this afternoon.
34:11I forgot about it.
34:12He didn't.
34:13And he can't just change plans on Max because he falls apart.
34:17He's not the only kid who has been dealt a rough hand.
34:22I know.
34:22All Drew has done his whole life is sit around and wait for his father to show up.
34:27Wait for him at school.
34:28Wait for him after soccer.
34:30Wait for him on whole weekends that were his weekends to take them and he would never show
34:34up.
34:34And the last thing he needs is another half-assed father figure.
34:38Half-assed?
34:46I would have loved to have gone to the ballpark this afternoon.
34:50It was because of your son that I got to go to the ballpark in the first place.
34:53And these last few days have been great playing ball with those boys.
34:57It was almost like Max didn't have a situation.
35:04And that is what was so hard about this afternoon.
35:11I'm sorry.
35:22Last couple days.
35:28It was almost like Drew had a father.
35:32Thanks to you.
35:39He's a good ball player.
35:41Really?
35:41Mm-hmm.
35:50Prepare to be whisked away.
35:52Hi, honey.
35:53Your mother is watching Sidney tonight.
35:55I have a brief to in the morning.
35:56Don't worry.
35:57I've got it all under control so you don't have to.
36:01Oh, boy.
36:03Come on.
36:03Come on.
36:10They're closed.
36:12Yeah, that's the point, Jules.
36:13That way we have the whole pool to ourselves.
36:17That's trespassing.
36:18Is it?
36:19No, I mean, it's a misdemeanor.
36:20Oh, my God.
36:21Well, what?
36:22They could charge us for breaking it at her again.
36:23They could.
36:24They could.
36:25We would get into a lot of trouble, wouldn't we?
36:26Here, come on.
36:28Right there.
36:30Come on, Braverman.
36:31God.
36:41Hey.
36:42Hey.
36:43Amber didn't drive you to drink, did she?
36:45No, no, no.
36:46No, not exactly.
36:47But I will have a beer.
36:49Yeah.
36:50Something in an ale.
36:51Sure.
36:52I'm going to have to see your ID, though.
36:55Bar policy.
36:56Oh, okay.
37:00Huh?
37:01Oh, really?
37:03Please don't hold the eyebrow piercing against me.
37:06It was a drunken college dare.
37:091983.
37:11Yep.
37:15So.
37:16Amber told me about the paper.
37:19Oh, she did?
37:22I'm really impressed.
37:23I couldn't tell you.
37:24And her new paper wasn't half bad, either.
37:27Doesn't seem like something that came off the Internet, does it?
37:30No, no, no.
37:30It sounded just like Amber.
37:33There's not a lot of downloaded papers that use the word suck with such frequency.
37:37Wow.
37:38That's good.
37:39That's great.
37:40I'm proud of her.
37:40Of course, it wasn't, uh, nearly as captivating and insightful as that first paper.
37:56An eyebrow piercing.
37:58Hmm.
37:59Hmm.
38:00Begs the question.
38:01Tattoos?
38:02No, no, no tattoos.
38:14Hey.
38:15Hey.
38:16Jabbar left this at my place last time, and I was going to take it to my sister's DNA
38:20guy, but then I thought Jabbar's oral hygiene is a lot more important than that, so.
38:31I get it.
38:32I get it.
38:33You know, we don't really know each other very well, and I just dropped this thing right
38:38on your lap.
38:39You have every right to want to know for sure.
38:44Yeah.
38:45I know for sure.
38:46I know.
38:48But let's just take the test anyway.
38:50Let's make your annoying sister happy.
38:55That's impossible, but...
38:57You can try.
38:57We can try.
38:58If they prosecute me for trespassing with criminal intent, that's considered a felony.
39:03Uh-huh.
39:03I could be disbarred.
39:04Uh-huh.
39:05I don't even want to think about what kind of fine or jail time that entails.
39:10I wouldn't.
39:11You would have to go back to work.
39:12Oh.
39:13Which would mean there's no one to watch Cindy because I'm in jail.
39:16So, and...
39:17No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
39:30Chocolate chip pancakes.
39:31Uh-huh.
39:32I'm just trying to, you know, cheer Hattie up after everything that happened with Steve yesterday.
39:36Yeah.
39:37Oh, my God.
39:38Stop.
39:39Do you think?
39:40Hmm.
39:41Well, it seems to be taking it pretty well.
39:44Hey, Hattie.
39:46Morning.
39:47Hi.
39:48Who are you texting?
39:50Steve.
39:50Who?
39:51Oh.
39:52I know.
39:52Um, he totally admitted that he was wrong about love, actually.
39:57Oh.
39:57Really?
39:58Mm-hmm.
39:58The movie really shut him down because he's been afraid to care about somebody the way that
40:02Mark cares about Kira Knightley, like, till now.
40:05And he was just masking his vulnerability with cynicism.
40:11That's cute.
40:12I know.
40:13That's cute.
40:13He's really sensitive.
40:15Oh.
40:17That's nice.
40:20What do you say?
40:21What is it?
40:23What's he saying?
40:25Nothing.
40:25Oh.
40:26Okay.
40:27All right.
40:27Well, what are we going to do about this?
40:29Nothing.
40:29Nothing.
40:30It is what it is, and there's nothing we can do about it.
40:35Well, can I still hate the guy?
40:41Come on, Max.
40:47Max, please.
40:50Get under it.
40:52Come on, Max.
40:54Got it.
40:54I got it.
41:33Oh, come on.
41:38I know my mind's all over the line
41:43But when I'm loving on the human population
41:51Beg out my heart, let it start
41:57Love is the birth of a nation
42:04Falling from the good moon of the human town
42:09And all the stories of creation
42:16Came from the same flame
42:21One day, one day at a time
42:26One day, one day at a time
42:48All day, one day at a time
42:58Come on, come on.
43:21You
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