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00:09Erkl, would you hold still?
00:11I've got to finish this for my art class.
00:13Sorry, Eddie.
00:15You know, I was real flattered when you chose me as the model for your Greek god.
00:25Erkl, what in the world are you doing?
00:28Posing as a Greek god.
00:30Does seeing me like this give you any ideas?
00:34As a matter of fact, it does.
00:36I just remembered, Mom told me to go to the market and pick up a chicken.
00:52It's a rare condition, this day and age,
00:55To read any good news on the newspaper page.
00:59And love and tradition of the grand design.
01:02Some people say it's even harder to find.
01:07Well, then there must be some magic clue inside these gentle walls.
01:13Cause all I see is a tower of dreams, real love bursting out of every scene.
01:21As days go by, we're gonna fill our house with happiness.
01:30The moon may dry, but we'll smother the blues with tenderness.
01:36As days go by, there's room for you, room for me.
01:43For gentle hearts and opportunity.
01:47As days go by, it's the bigger love of the family.
02:07Hi, everybody.
02:08Hi, Rodney.
02:10Great news.
02:11Eddie's running for president of the freshman class.
02:14That's cool.
02:15Hey, congratulations, baby.
02:17Wait a minute.
02:17I said I would think about it.
02:19Eddie, do it.
02:21You've got charisma.
02:22You think so?
02:24I use a dandruff shampoo.
02:28No, I mean, I think you could win.
02:31The only other person running is Margie Flegman.
02:34I don't know.
02:35I'm not sure if politics is for me.
02:38You know, honey,
02:40there's something very appealing about a man in charge.
02:43Women are always throwing themselves at politicians.
02:46They are?
02:46Sure.
02:48Why else would anyone date Henry Kissinger?
02:53Rodney, I'm running.
02:55It's the least I can do for all the babies in freshman class.
03:10Five times two is ten.
03:12Five times three is fifteen.
03:14Five times four is twenty.
03:16Can't you do that silently?
03:21No.
03:25Then do it upstairs.
03:28Actually, baby, that's not a bad idea.
03:31I guess she told you.
03:35And you go help her.
03:40Hi, guys.
03:41Hi.
03:42Look what I'm collecting.
03:43Empty soda cans.
03:46Well, everybody needs a hobby.
03:49No, Carl.
03:51See, I'm doing research for an article I'm writing on the environment.
03:53And I have learned so much about how we're destroying the earth.
03:56So I decided to do my part and start recycling.
03:59Well, I think that's a very good idea.
04:02Absolutely.
04:02I think we should all chip in and help save the environment.
04:05Yep.
04:07Rachel, you're not going to go off the deep end with this ecology thing, are you?
04:10I don't know, Harriet.
04:11I'm just doing research for my article.
04:13I got it under control.
04:18No!
04:23What?
04:24What do you think you're doing?
04:27Well, I was trying to spray Wonder Whip on my pie.
04:30This is in an aerosol can.
04:32Those fluorocarbons are putting a hole in the ozone layer.
04:36Well, all I wanted was a snack.
04:38Go ahead.
04:39Eat the pie.
04:40Destroy the world.
04:42Boy, you try to educate people.
04:44And do they want to learn?
04:45No, they want to eat pie.
04:48I'm glad she didn't go off the deep end.
05:00Come on, Rodney.
05:02I'm going to get elected.
05:03I need a better slogan than Eddie for president.
05:06Okay.
05:07Okay, I've got it.
05:08Listen to this.
05:10Vote for Eddie.
05:15With that slogan, you're going to get exactly one vote.
05:18That is, if Rodney can make an X.
05:22Oh, yeah?
05:23Well, what would you do differently?
05:24Well, first, I find a better slogan.
05:27Something like, um, win with Winslow.
05:31See, with win already in the name, it's a natural connection.
05:34And you were trying to make something out of slow.
05:43Then I develop a platform of popular ideas.
05:46Things like, um, less homework, longer lunch breaks, and bigger lockers.
05:51So, she's got good ideas.
05:54I've got buttons.
05:59Who's Edie Winslow?
06:04It says Eddie Winslow.
06:06Since when do you spell Eddie with one D?
06:11Since we got a thousand of these?
06:14You got a thousand buttons to call me, Edie?
06:18It's all we can afford.
06:19They charge by the letter.
06:22Let me lay it out for you.
06:24You've got exactly one chance to win.
06:27Make me your campaign manager.
06:29I don't know, Laura.
06:31Let me think about it.
06:33Okay, you're in.
06:40Okay, come on.
06:42Your first lesson of the day.
06:44This is aluminum.
06:46Aluminum can be recycled.
06:48And recycling is easy and good for the environment.
06:51See?
06:53It goes right in there.
06:56There.
06:57Now, can you say environmentalist?
07:03Can you say recycle?
07:09How about mama?
07:11Can you say mama?
07:15Rachel.
07:16What are all these cans?
07:17Oh, I got us all set up for recycling.
07:20When they're full, I just drop them off at the recycling center.
07:23See?
07:23I got stacks of paper, cans for plastic,
07:26clear glass,
07:27colored glass,
07:29aluminum,
07:30and other metals.
07:31Well, now,
07:32what's this one for?
07:35Whoa.
07:38What is it there?
07:40Those are dirty diapers.
07:42You want to take those out on the porch?
08:02Hey, here's a coupon for a free sushi dinner.
08:07You hate raw fish.
08:09Well, we'll get it to go bring it home and cook it.
08:17Wow, Eddie.
08:18You look great.
08:21Meet the next president of the freshman class.
08:24Eddie, why don't you try to get mom and dad's vote?
08:27Hi there.
08:28Hi.
08:31I'm Edward Winslow,
08:32and I'm seeking your vote for freshman class president.
08:34If I'm elected,
08:35I promise to serve the will of the students to the best of my ability.
08:39If you don't mind,
08:40I'd like to give you this.
08:42It's my motto.
08:43Win with Winslow.
08:45And with your support,
08:46we can both be winners.
08:48Allow me.
08:56Sorry, Dad.
08:58Well, son,
08:59other than bleeding,
09:00I'm very impressed.
09:02Wait a minute.
09:03He flashed you a smile
09:05and stuck you with a button.
09:06In between, he said nothing.
09:09Go get it.
09:16Excuse me.
09:18But didn't I see you won 227?
09:20Give me a break.
09:23I knew it was one of those shows.
09:25Anyway,
09:29I just wanted to say
09:30that I really appreciate your support
09:32for freshman class president.
09:34And did I mention what a wonderful outfit that is?
09:37And what a beautiful smile you have.
09:44He's good.
09:47He just might win.
09:49He's gotten my vote.
09:53Hey, honey.
09:55Here's a two-for-one coupon to the movies.
09:57It's only good till 6 p.m.
09:59Come on, if we leave now,
10:00we can make it.
10:02What's planned?
10:03Who cares?
10:04I'm getting in free.
10:07Good night, kids.
10:07Bye, kids.
10:08Bye, Mom.
10:08Bye, Dad.
10:10I'm proud of you, Eddie.
10:12You're really doing great.
10:13Thanks.
10:14And who knows?
10:15Maybe I'll be the next Dan Quayle.
10:22Eddie, I don't think you want to be saying that in public.
10:27All right.
10:28What now?
10:29Well, we just lay low for the next two days.
10:32If we can keep you away from big groups
10:34and from being asked a lot of questions,
10:36we'll win the election.
10:39Guys, great news.
10:41I arranged for Eddie to debate Margie Flagman tomorrow
10:44in front of the whole school.
10:46A debate?
10:48With questions?
10:50In front of people?
10:53Well, unless we find a picture of Margie
10:56on a yacht with Gary Hartman,
10:57we're dead meat.
11:11Laura, I think murder goes on your permanent record.
11:16I thought a debate would be great exposure.
11:19It's just the editor of the school paper
11:21asking questions.
11:22Okay, how's this?
11:24We'll avoid the issues.
11:25Forget about content.
11:27We'll use empty phrases.
11:29Like, um, I'm glad you asked that question,
11:31but I won't have an answer until the facts are in.
11:34Hey, that's good.
11:36I can use that one in class.
11:38Great.
11:39You take care of Eddie?
11:40I'm going to go draw mustaches
11:42on Margie Flagman's posters.
11:46Hi, Rodney.
11:48Hi, Rodney.
11:50What's that on your shirt?
11:52Where?
11:53Ow!
11:59You gotta teach me
12:01that trick someday.
12:03Yeah, right.
12:12Hi, Laura.
12:14My, you look lovely this evening.
12:17Not now, Urkel.
12:18I'm in the middle of something.
12:20Go home.
12:21I can't.
12:22It's my parents' bridge night,
12:23and I'm not allowed near their friends.
12:30Okay, you can stay, but just don't say anything.
12:34Oh, I promise.
12:34Not a word.
12:37Okay.
12:38Now,
12:40tequila wasn't in this to make this.
12:46Urkel, stop humming.
12:49Was that me?
12:53Can we please get back to my election?
12:55Okay, now...
12:56Oh, yeah, that's right.
12:58You're running for Frost Prez
13:00against Margie Flagman.
13:02Say hi to her for me.
13:04You know her?
13:06Why, sure.
13:07We go to the same eye doctor,
13:09dermatologist, and allergist.
13:14She's a real nerd.
13:18You're calling her a nerd?
13:20Why, sure.
13:22I mean, she's nice and all,
13:23but socially, she's a real dud.
13:29Urkel, you just gave me an idea.
13:32Does it involve you and me alone
13:35on a desert island?
13:41Steve, it's that time again.
13:43Believe it or not,
13:44you've overstayed your welcome.
13:46What, did I say something?
13:47Did I belch?
13:48I do things unconsciously sometimes.
13:53Goodbye, Steve.
13:58Thank you for a lovely evening.
14:21Now, Eddie, you're going to be fine.
14:24Just remember, smile and avoid the issues.
14:27In other words, act like a president.
14:30Got it.
14:30Attention!
14:32Everybody, please take their seats.
14:35Ladies and gentlemen,
14:36as your student council president,
14:38I'd like to welcome you to today's debate
14:40between the candidates
14:41for freshman class president.
14:44Margie Flegman,
14:45Edward Winslow,
14:46please take your positions.
14:48Good luck.
14:48Thanks.
14:49The moderator will be
14:50Rebecca Sandler,
14:51editor of the monthly Beacon.
14:57Hey, Laura.
15:00The spontaneous demonstrations
15:02are all planned.
15:05Great.
15:06Okay.
15:07Our first question
15:08will go to Eddie Winslow.
15:09Eddie,
15:10how do you feel
15:11about school-sponsored activities
15:12that help the community?
15:15You're talking to me?
15:16Yes.
15:18Oh.
15:19Um,
15:20well, I'm glad you asked me
15:21that question.
15:22I want you to know
15:23I formed a committee
15:23to look into that
15:24and I plan to issue
15:25a full statement
15:26as soon as I read their report.
15:29All right!
15:31Winslow!
15:32Winslow!
15:32Winslow!
15:33Winslow!
15:35Winslow!
15:36Winslow!
15:37Winslow!
15:37Winslow!
15:39Margie,
15:40the same question.
15:44Is this off?
15:48Well,
15:50I was thinking
15:51our school
15:51could try to coexist
15:52hand in hand
15:53with our community.
15:55But we haven't
15:56been doing enough.
15:57Like last year
15:58we had only one
15:59food and clothing drive.
16:01Maybe this year
16:02we could have two
16:03each semester.
16:04I really think
16:05we should help
16:06those who are
16:06less fortunate.
16:07Boo!
16:08Sit down,
16:08flag man!
16:12Eddie,
16:13what steps would you take
16:14to improve
16:14our school's
16:15academic average?
16:17Well,
16:18before I begin,
16:19Rebecca,
16:20I just want to say
16:21that's a lovely
16:22dress you're wearing.
16:25And I'd also like
16:26to say
16:27that I only want
16:28the best
16:28for my fellow students
16:29and I'm proud
16:30to be an American.
16:32Eddie!
16:33Eddie!
16:34Eddie!
16:35Eddie!
16:37Eddie!
16:38Eddie!
16:39Eddie!
16:39Eddie!
16:39Thank you!
16:41Let's give Margie
16:42equal time.
16:43Boo!
16:45Margie,
16:46the same question?
16:48Well,
16:49I'd like to see
16:49the stronger students
16:50tutoring those
16:51who need some help.
16:53Also,
16:53we could keep
16:54the library open
16:54longer hours.
16:56It just seems to me
16:57everyone's going to
16:58have to put in
16:58a lot of hard work.
16:59No work!
17:00No work!
17:01No work!
17:03No work!
17:04No work!
17:05No work!
17:06No work!
17:06No work!
17:11Harriet,
17:12what is going on
17:14in here?
17:15I don't know,
17:16but I think
17:16there used to be
17:17a kitchen under here
17:18somewhere.
17:20I think I need
17:21a couple of
17:21aspirin.
17:22There's some
17:23in the pantry,
17:23baby.
17:38Where in the pantry?
17:46Hi, guys.
17:49Rachel,
17:50what are you doing?
17:51This place looks like
17:52a recycling center.
17:54It is a recycling center.
18:01Why?
18:05Well,
18:06there wasn't one
18:07around here.
18:08Rachel,
18:08I can't believe
18:09you did this.
18:11Well,
18:12I guess I did
18:13go overboard
18:13a little bit.
18:14A little bit?
18:15Rachel,
18:16I nearly got a
18:16concussion
18:17trying to get
18:17an aspirin.
18:19Look,
18:19Rachel,
18:20we believe in
18:21recycling and
18:22doing whatever
18:22else we need
18:23to do to save
18:23our planet.
18:24But a recycling center
18:25belongs in a
18:26parking lot,
18:27not in our kitchen.
18:29But, Harriet,
18:30I want to do
18:30something to help
18:31with our environment.
18:32Rachel,
18:33Rachel,
18:33you are doing
18:34something.
18:35That article you're
18:36writing will inspire
18:37a lot of people
18:37to recycle.
18:38And we'll continue
18:39to recycle our stuff,
18:41too.
18:41But we'll do it
18:42reasonably.
18:43No one can stick
18:44to the kind of plan
18:44that you set up.
18:47I guess you're right.
18:49Oh, look.
18:51I'm sorry I jumped
18:52off the deep end.
18:54Again.
18:56That's okay.
18:57You just write
18:57a good article
18:58and we'll forget
18:58all about it.
19:00Okay.
19:00I'm going to go up
19:01and check on
19:02little Richie
19:02and then I'll
19:03come back down
19:04and clean this up.
19:05Okay.
19:18How did your parents
19:20ever survive
19:21her wonder years?
19:28We can also improve
19:29student-faculty relations
19:30with small
19:31and informal dinners.
19:33Not bad.
19:35Eddie,
19:35how would you improve
19:36student-faculty relations?
19:38Ooh.
19:39That's a tough question.
19:41And I don't
19:43have any idea.
19:45But like Margie said,
19:48Eddie!
19:49Eddie!
19:49Eddie!
19:50Eddie!
19:51Eddie!
19:52Paul!
19:52Eddie!
19:53Eddie!
19:54He only had the deep
19:55for an hour.
19:57Margie,
19:58a good leader
19:59must be able
19:59to work well
20:00with others.
20:01Do you have
20:01this necessary quality?
20:03I do have
20:04the ability
20:05to work well
20:05with other people.
20:07Nerd!
20:07Nerd!
20:08Nerd!
20:09I think my being
20:10recording secretary
20:12for the chess club
20:12for the past three years
20:13proves that fact.
20:15Nerd!
20:15Nerd!
20:16Nerd!
20:17Nerd!
20:18Nerd!
20:18I am who I am.
20:20Nerd!
20:20I'll do the best job
20:21I can.
20:22Nerd!
20:23Nerd!
20:24Nerd!
20:24Nerd!
20:24Nerd!
20:26Hey, come on,
20:26be quiet!
20:27Nerd!
20:27Nerd!
20:29Nerd!
20:30You guys haven't
20:30been listening
20:31to what Margie's
20:31been saying.
20:33She's smart,
20:34she's organized
20:35and she'll get
20:35things done.
20:37I'm only doing this
20:38because I thought
20:38I'd get girls.
20:39I love you, Eddie!
20:45But you're treating
20:46this like it's
20:46a popularity contest.
20:48And that's not
20:48what it should be.
20:50She'll elect
20:51the person
20:51with the best ideas.
20:53Not the one
20:53with the best looks.
20:56Sorry, Margie.
21:01In fact,
21:01to make things
21:02easy for you,
21:03I'm dropping out.
21:07If you're smart,
21:08you'll vote for Margie.
21:10I know I will.
21:32Laura,
21:33can we talk?
21:38What is there
21:39to talk about?
21:41You had it
21:42all locked up.
21:43The crowd
21:44was with you.
21:46Laura,
21:47I just decided
21:48what I was doing
21:48was wrong
21:49and I couldn't
21:50go through with it.
21:51Eddie,
21:52you would have won.
21:54Isn't that
21:54the most important thing?
21:57Not when it's
21:57based on dirty tricks.
21:59And deep down inside,
22:00you know it's wrong, too.
22:03I didn't do
22:04anything that bad.
22:07Come on, Laura,
22:08admit it.
22:09You just got caught up
22:10in the power of politics.
22:12Well,
22:13maybe there were
22:14a few things
22:15I could have done
22:16differently.
22:17Laura,
22:18a few things.
22:21Okay, okay,
22:21you're right.
22:24I don't know
22:25what happened to me.
22:26I just wanted
22:27to win so badly.
22:31Well,
22:32there are some things
22:32that are more important
22:33than winning.
22:35I know.
22:38I'm sorry
22:38I got you involved
22:39in all that stuff.
22:41I was wrong.
22:44Well,
22:44good for you.
22:45And, you know,
22:46Margie would make
22:46a much better president
22:47than I would have.
22:48Oh, yeah,
22:49absolutely.
22:51You could have
22:51thought about it
22:52for a second.
22:54It's not.
22:56Well,
22:57I guess I won't
22:58be needing these.
23:01I'll just put them
23:02over until you
23:02get in high school.
23:14A great job!
23:17A great job!
23:28A great job!
23:32A great job!
23:35A great job!
23:39A great job!
23:42A great job!
23:47A great job!
23:49A great job!
23:49A great job!
23:49A great job!
23:49A great job!
23:50A great job!
23:51A great job!
23:53A great job!
23:58Amen.
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