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00:00Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
00:33Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:00...is Andy. The aftermath got dumped on him, and the way he's been handling it is just so...
01:06...competent.
01:06Right?
01:07Are the nards hurting? Yeah, you bet. Got kicked pretty hard. Family shattered. Super sad.
01:12But I'm kind of crushing it in the damage control department, so that's cool.
01:16I wish my dad could see me now.
01:18Of course, he caused this whole mess, so...
01:21...him.
01:22Kevin, listen to me.
01:25I'm in love with the senator, and I need time to sort this out in a responsible manner, so I
01:30need your help in keeping it a secret, because this means the world to me.
01:35Okay. Okay?
01:37That's beautiful. No, I totally get that.
01:41Can you do this, Kevin?
01:43I really want to. Whatever happens, always remember that.
01:49I don't know what that means. Hey, hey.
01:51Oh, great.
01:53Yeah, um, I'll get right back to you.
01:57Hey, guys. Has anyone ever heard of Iris Black on the radio?
02:01Yeah, she hosts the Dr. Laura show.
02:03Nope, that's Dr. Laura.
02:05Well, her show Biz Whiz wants someone from Dunder Mifflin to come on the air today.
02:09Does anybody feel particularly passionate about local business issues?
02:12I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do.
02:16The media can make you famous.
02:18And do you have any idea how easy it is to sell something when you're famous?
02:23Uh, yeah, wow. Ten reams of 40-pound bond at only $6.90 after discount?
02:28Uh, whatever you say, Brad Pitt.
02:31It's that easy.
02:34Hey, so that good-looking single brother of yours? Heard he was in a downward spiral with booze.
02:39Yeah, he's in rehab, actually.
02:42Which place?
02:42The one right near Philly? I could be there in an hour.
02:45No, it's in New Mexico.
02:47Wow.
02:49So, how are you holding up?
02:52We're done, Meredith.
02:54All right.
02:58Greta, the tittle-tattle, prattled on about the little metal bottle.
03:01She spat a bit of spittle on the modern brittle bottle in a bitter battle.
03:04Hey, hey, stop questioning my methods, okay?
03:07I was chosen for this task for a very good reason.
03:11Non, vous chosez vous-même.
03:12Tricky Siskel, spat a bit, a wicked biscuit.
03:16All right, guys, there's a lot of assets here that my dad couldn't steal.
03:19Now, first of all, there is the family boat, 43-foot tartan sloop.
03:24My lawyer has lined up a buyer in the Bahamas.
03:26The sale would cover the cost of a condo and living expenses for my mom.
03:31Sounds great.
03:32Totally, except it is a no-go.
03:34This boat was the heart and soul of our family.
03:36So, what else we got? Non-boat ideas.
03:38What happened?
03:39Jammed.
03:40Could this day get worse?
03:42Yeah, I think this day could get worse.
03:45What does that mean?
03:47Kevin?
03:49I don't know what you're talking about.
03:52She could get, like, 60 packages of ramen noodles for five bucks.
03:56She could eat for a month.
03:58All right, what's the grand total? Did we make her a nut?
04:00If we sell everything but the boat, your mom should be set for about six months.
04:07Guys, you don't understand.
04:08Man, this boat's been in our family since before I was born.
04:11Yeah.
04:12Don't you guys have that place where you used to spend your summers and have all those memories?
04:17I worked at a Jiffy Lube.
04:18See?
04:19I bet you wouldn't sell that Jiffy Lube for all the money in the world, would you, Daryl?
04:22I would if I owned it and I went broke.
04:25All right, uh, all right. I'm going to tell the lawyer to pull the trigger on the boat.
04:29Yes, the boat means everything to my family, but we need the money.
04:33Got the memories? Don't need the boat. Can't cry about it.
04:35What are you going to do? Cry about it?
04:36Excuse me.
04:40Oh, okay. No problem. Thanks.
04:44Hey guys, WPTU called. The interview's off.
04:48They're opening a new cupcake store at the Steamtown Mall and Iris wants to cover that, so...
04:52Well, why don't I go and tell Dwight so he can stop being such a complete nipple?
04:57He's going to be disappointed.
04:59Yes, he is. And you know what? We could not let that happen.
05:09Facts?
05:10Oh, yeah. That's...
05:14Watermelon teeth.
05:16This isn't how I would cheer up just anyone, but it's a girlfriend's job to know her man, and I
05:21know Andy.
05:22He's seriously juvenile.
05:24Cool.
05:25He's like 40, though, right?
05:27Oh, no. He couldn't be more than, like, 30s tops.
05:31Awesome. Have fun.
05:36Boom. Dunder Mifflin.
05:38Dunder Mifflin.
05:39Good. Sounds...
05:46This is Dwight Schrute.
05:48Please hold for Ms. Black.
05:52And welcome back to Biz Whiz.
05:54I'm Iris Black.
05:55On the line, we have Dunder Mifflin's senior sales associate, Dwight Schrute.
06:00Iris, thank you so much for having me.
06:04Oh, my teeth are all that stuff in my mouth.
06:07Uh, did you need something?
06:10Oh, I'll just need your signals on this.
06:14Okay.
06:20Thanks.
06:26Kevin, we're out of 1138 forms.
06:28Did you order more?
06:29I did not.
06:32Well, I don't know why I'm surprised.
06:34Literally nothing you could do could surprise me anymore.
06:37Oh, really, Angela?
06:38That's interesting.
06:40Because I do think that I could surprise you.
06:43I think that I could surprise you.
06:46Oh, no.
06:48I have to go to the bathroom.
06:50That doesn't surprise me.
06:52That actually wasn't the worst cover.
06:54I'd say at least once a week, Kevin runs out of the room shouting that he has to go to
06:57the bathroom.
06:58So the supply forms are going to be...
07:00I have to go to the bathroom.
07:03I have to go to the bathroom.
07:14Okay, who wants to go for a super fun lunch with a super fun girlfriend?
07:18Look, it's not that I don't want...
07:21Okay, come on.
07:21I got someone to cover the phones.
07:23I heard on the radio about a new cupcake place we could go for dessert.
07:26Perfect.
07:28All I ever wanted to do was sail the damn thing.
07:32But Dad wouldn't let me.
07:33He said, you can't be a skipper.
07:34Until you're a man.
07:36You know, I'd reach for the wheel and he'd just smack my hand away.
07:40Well, guess what?
07:41Now I'm the man of the family.
07:44And we're selling the damn thing.
07:47So I'm never going to have the chance.
07:49Well, when does the boat leave exactly?
07:51Tonight.
07:52Then screw lunch.
07:53Let's go for a sunset sail.
07:55Yeah, right.
07:56It's in Stanford, Connecticut.
07:59We have to leave, like, right now.
08:00Okay, well then let's leave, like, right now.
08:02Yeah, okay.
08:02Yeah, okay.
08:04Let's go.
08:05Seriously?
08:05Of course, seriously.
08:07Get your coat on.
08:09All right.
08:10All right.
08:10Let's do it.
08:11Let's do it.
08:13Iris, let me tell you, David Wallace is the CEO.
08:17But he's not hands-on.
08:18So the day-to-day operations are entirely under your command?
08:22Entirely is the perfect way to describe it, Iris.
08:25Uh, excuse me.
08:26I'm being told by my sound engineer, Steve, that, uh, there is a clinking sound coming from
08:31your end.
08:32Does your shirt have buttons?
08:34Yes.
08:35I'm so sorry.
08:36We are going to have to ask you to remove the shirt altogether.
08:45Now then, we were saying, when my workers gather...
08:50Oh, I'm so sorry.
08:50I am told we are still having problems, Mr. Shrewd.
08:53Your voice, it's sounding a little feminine.
08:56That's impossible.
08:56Are you by any chance wearing pants with a metallic zipper?
09:06Senator is exhausted.
09:07This campaign is wearing him out.
09:09It's a tough one.
09:10That man he's up against is so dirty.
09:12And the senator is just pushing back as hard as he can.
09:17Please stop.
09:19What?
09:20Please stop.
09:23Anyways, last night he was so tired, he just wanted a little Mexican.
09:26brought in.
09:28I can't.
09:29It's too much.
09:35I'm in big trouble.
09:38Yeah, Oscar's in big trouble.
09:45Okay, how is my voice now?
09:47I'm getting the all clear from Steve.
09:49So, Mr. Shrewd, what is your response to the Consumer Product Safety Commission
09:53that says Dunder Mifflin's paper is toxic?
09:56This is gotcha journalism, but you know what?
09:58They're not going to gotch me.
10:00It's clearly not an accounting mistake.
10:02Oh, Kevin.
10:05This gambling problem must have resurfaced.
10:08I'm going to have to send him home until I can do an investigation.
10:11You got to do what you got to do.
10:15This is slander, Ms. Black.
10:17Slander, I say.
10:18I dare you to produce one credible source about this.
10:22Well, as it happens, we have with us
10:24the foreman of your upstate New York paper mill,
10:27Sandra Mick.
10:28Sandra Mick.
10:30Good afternoon, Iris.
10:32It's a pleasure.
10:32I'll get straight to the point.
10:33Is your paper toxic?
10:35No, the paper's not toxic.
10:36Thank you, Sandra.
10:37Unless it's exposed to oxygen.
10:40Then it becomes extremely toxic.
10:41Do not listen to her.
10:42This employee is obviously disgruntled.
10:44What the heck is going on?
10:45The stock price is plummeting.
10:47Are you going to get control of the message
10:48or do I have to send in someone who understands the meaning?
10:50Get out of here, moron.
10:51Hey.
10:52Ah, excuse me, Mr. Dwight.
10:53Who are you talking to?
10:54Uh, no one.
10:56Did you just call Ms. Mick a moron?
10:57No, everything's fine.
10:59Are you insulting my guests?
11:03Okay, I will be right there.
11:07Hey, Oscar.
11:09What if I'm getting a promotion?
11:11I hope that's it, Kevin.
11:13Me too.
11:13Because then I would get my own office
11:17and I wouldn't screw up your secret with Angela.
11:21I've been really worried about that.
11:29Hi, Kevin.
11:31Look, I need to talk to you.
11:33Hey, guys.
11:34Excuse me.
11:35Um, a quick word.
11:37Please just...
11:37Oscar, we're in the middle of talking.
11:39Oh, my God.
11:39I'm so sorry.
11:40Snack machine on me.
11:42Well, that is nice.
11:44Huh.
11:45Classy move.
11:47That's what I'm saying.
11:49No, of course not.
11:51What?
11:51What are you doing?
11:55Those figures I gave you, they're false.
11:58No.
11:59I was mad at Kevin.
12:01We had a fight, and I acted vindictively.
12:05So you set him up?
12:07Yes, he's innocent.
12:10I knew it.
12:11I knew it from the beginning.
12:13This was a possibility.
12:14What are you talking about?
12:15I just did this now.
12:16I don't know.
12:17A few years ago, when I was on the jury,
12:20this grand strike.
12:20Sure.
12:22I was sorry, it might have been set up,
12:23but I felt pressured to convict.
12:25That's gotta be tough.
12:26Tough?
12:27I put an innocent man on death row.
12:30The fallout from this morning's revelation
12:32continues to mount.
12:33Since Mr. Dwight Schrute began speaking,
12:35Dunner Mifflin's share prices fell 73%.
12:38Mr. Schrute, shareholders demand accountability
12:41from corporate leadership.
12:43Can we announce your resignation at this time?
12:45My resignation?
12:46What are you talking about?
12:46No, I'm just following orders.
12:48Listen, the person responsible for this catastrophe
12:50is the CEO and chairman, David Wallace.
12:55That's yours?
12:56That's the family boat right there.
12:57Oh my gosh, Andy.
12:59This is enormous.
13:00Right?
13:01I thought it was gonna be tiny.
13:02Oh my gosh, it's beautiful.
13:05So this is how your family came to America.
13:08Move.
13:09Sorry?
13:11I'm trying to rig a boat here.
13:12I don't know how to do that
13:12when you're standing in the way.
13:13Sure.
13:14I'm not, I didn't know.
13:15I'm not a ghost, so I can't walk through people.
13:19Okay?
13:20Okay.
13:20He was salty.
13:21He is a little bit.
13:24How you doing, old buddy?
13:25Missed ya.
13:26What does that one do?
13:27This raises the main sail.
13:29That was my job when we went sailing.
13:30I wish I had seen you do it.
13:32Really?
13:33Yeah.
13:35Up she goes.
13:37Don't do that.
13:39Don't do that.
13:40Oh, it's okay.
13:40My girlfriend and I were actually gonna
13:42take her for a little spin and a picnic
13:43before you guys head out tonight.
13:44You know what?
13:45Get some dinner on me.
13:46Nope.
13:47Can't do that.
13:48Got it.
13:49You know what?
13:50Then we'll just take it for a quick little
13:51spin around the harbor.
13:54We've already started boarding.
13:55No one is ensured to rig her up right now,
13:57except us.
13:58You know what?
13:59Chill.
13:59Okay?
14:00I own the boat.
14:01I'm not gonna sue myself.
14:03All right?
14:03So just...
14:06Wow.
14:06I can smack you all day if you keep touching
14:08what you're not supposed to touch.
14:10Okay, fine.
14:12Okay?
14:12Yeah, fine.
14:13Good stuff.
14:13Good stuff.
14:14Great stuff.
14:19Damn it.
14:20Screw you, Dad.
14:21Yeah.
14:24Well, we're doing it.
14:25We're finally having a picnic on the boat.
14:29I've had a thousand picnics on this boat.
14:32Point was for me to sail it.
14:34Andy, you never had to sail the boat
14:37to be a man.
14:39Fine, but I could have.
14:41As long as we're on this boat,
14:43as far as I'm concerned,
14:44you're the captain.
14:46I am the captain.
14:47Yeah.
14:48Right?
14:49Yeah.
14:52I'm the captain.
14:57Hey, charm school.
15:00What?
15:01I'm taking over from here.
15:02Nice.
15:05Okay, I hate to ruin this moment or breakdown,
15:08but you already signed the papers.
15:09So if you want your boat back,
15:11you can pick it up there in the Bahamas in 10 days.
15:13Yeah, I know, because I'm sailing it there.
15:15Okay, no.
15:15I already said you're not getting back your deposit.
15:18Fine.
15:18Keep it.
15:19Just leave the supplies.
15:21I already paid for those.
15:23How much for that cool fisherman sweater?
15:27For those just joining us,
15:29Terror in Greenwich,
15:30where the police have surrounded the house
15:32of Dunder Mifflin's CEO, David Wallace.
15:34Wallace is said to be despondent
15:36over the company's stock plummet
15:39and has taken a mailman hostage.
15:41On the line, we have
15:42Chief of Greenwich Police,
15:45Mr. Bill Jackson.
15:47Good afternoon.
15:50Please, sir, spare him.
15:51Please.
15:52Uh, this Wallace guy is looking at hard time,
15:55and we only know this
15:56because of what Dwight Snoot said on record.
15:59Okay, everyone, everyone, hold on.
16:01I've got a solution.
16:03I know Wallace's phone number.
16:04Everyone hold, I'll conference him in.
16:06Oh, no, Mr. Shrut,
16:07there's really no need to involve Mr. Wallace.
16:10Do you even know what you're doing?
16:11Yeah.
16:12Yeah, I know how to hoist the mainsail.
16:14I know how to...
16:16These buttons control bilge pumps and stuff.
16:19I also know where the booze stash is.
16:22Hello?
16:25Walt?
16:26Oh, God.
16:28Thank goodness you're here.
16:29I was having a little trouble
16:32with this door
16:34yesterday.
16:34I, um...
16:37I think it was yesterday.
16:39I thought you were in rehab.
16:40Yeah, I just, uh,
16:41I figured I'd get that first relapse, uh,
16:43out of the way.
16:44God, what's happened to our family?
16:47Everything is so messed up.
16:49How did you even know I was in here?
16:51I didn't.
16:52I just came to say goodbye to the boat,
16:53but I've decided to sail it to Bermuda.
16:57Bahamas, Andy.
16:58Same thing.
16:59I need a crew.
17:01You should be my crew.
17:03Three weeks, open ocean, no booze.
17:05You need this.
17:06I need it.
17:07We need this.
17:08Serious bro time.
17:09Come on.
17:10Hello?
17:10David, is that you?
17:12Dwight?
17:13Oh, thank God.
17:14Oh, thank God.
17:14Are you okay?
17:15Is everyone okay?
17:16Yeah.
17:17Are you okay?
17:17Well, I'm okay.
17:18I just want you to know
17:20that I believe in you.
17:22I really do.
17:23And I believe in your ability
17:25to make the right choices.
17:27I always have, David.
17:29Well, thanks, Dwight.
17:31You're welcome, sir.
17:33But David,
17:34listen to me carefully.
17:35I'm gonna need you
17:36to let the mailman go, okay?
17:39Dwight?
17:39Walk out of the house
17:41with your hands on top of your head.
17:43Everything is going to be fine.
17:45Dunder Mifflin will be in good hands
17:47while you're away in prison.
17:49Okay, Dwight?
17:50I'm gonna ask you
17:51to not call me on my cell anymore.
17:53Gotta go.
17:58Wait a minute.
18:00You guys?
18:01You heard?
18:03Shrewt!
18:04Shrewt!
18:05Shrewt!
18:06Shrewt!
18:06Shrewt!
18:07Shrewt!
18:07Shrewt!
18:08Shrewt!
18:08Shrewt!
18:08Shrewt!
18:09Shrewt!
18:09Shrewt!
18:09Shrewt!
18:09Well, I'd say my first radio interview
18:11went pretty much the way I expected.
18:14Well, Oscar,
18:15I did not get the promotion.
18:17He just wanted to update
18:19my personal information.
18:20Well, I'm sorry, Kevin.
18:23Why on earth would you think
18:25you were getting a promotion?
18:26You know what, Angela?
18:27I...
18:28Oh, my God!
18:30Honey, what are you doing here?
18:32Oh, I just had an intuition
18:34that someone I love
18:34needed a little of my attention today.
18:37Oscar, looking very healthy.
18:40Getting lots of vigorous exercise.
18:42Oh.
18:43Oh.
18:45Oscar, what is going on?
18:48What was that?
18:49What was that?
18:50I'm sorry, I didn't mean any offense.
18:52I was just trying to be friends.
18:52You know what?
18:53I'm sorry.
18:54I overreacted.
18:56Because I'm stressed out.
18:58Why am I stressed out?
18:59Who's not stressed out?
19:00Who's not stressed out?
19:01Come on, Oscar.
19:02We're not just going to sit here
19:04and ignore the obvious.
19:06Senator Lipton has a big election next week.
19:09We all need to give him our support.
19:13Thank you, thank you very much.
19:15Oh, thanks, everybody.
19:17Because it's really cool.
19:20U-S-A!
19:21U-S-A!
19:23I have to say, I'm impressed with Kevin.
19:29He showed a lot of self-control.
19:32I totally forgot about the affair for a minute.
19:39Oscar, he's having sex with this.
19:41sitting here, and Aaron still doesn't even know.
19:47Her life is a complete sham.
19:53All right, guys, cast us off.
19:55Whoa, all aboard.
19:56Aaron, this is because of you.
19:58Did you realize that?
19:59You're the best ever.
20:01Oh, you know, just being a good girlfriend.
20:04Good.
20:04Come on.
20:05Above and beyond.
20:07World's greatest.
20:08You did this.
20:11Dammit, I'm happy.
20:12Yes, I am very pleased I could help Andy.
20:15Would I have gone with him if he'd asked me?
20:17On his sailboat cruise to the Caribbean?
20:20Yes.
20:21I think that would have been really fun and romantic.
20:24I'll see you in three weeks.
20:25Okay.
20:26Hey, bro, he was here all along.
20:28No way!
20:29No way!
20:30Aaron, I gotta go.
20:42Thanks for covering the phones.
20:44Yeah, no problem.
20:45How was it?
20:46Fine.
20:53Hey, some buddies and I are going to poor Richard's for beers and pool.
20:55You want to come?
20:56I can't promise you too much, but, uh, you might get to meet my friend Flipper.
21:01Does he have a flipper?
21:03Oh, nope.
21:04It's not that.
21:05He, uh, uh, he flipped a table one time when he was drunk.
21:09He sounds like an idiot.
21:11Yeah, he is.
21:15Okay.
21:17Okay.
21:18Thanks.
21:19Thanks.
21:19Yeah.
21:28Thank you.
21:56Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
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