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Watch The Office Season 8 Episode 7 online in HD on Dailymotion (2025).
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00:00Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
00:30OK.
00:31It doesn't matter what it is.
00:32You're not going to get it, though.
00:33I'm not going to take it.
00:34And then he's going to be like, wow, this is a really important meeting.
00:37Copy that.
00:38OK.
00:41OK, so tell me exactly what kind of deal you are getting right now, and I'll tell you how we
00:48can beat it.
00:48Uh, well, we've been going with...
00:51Andy?
00:51Yeah?
00:51You have a very important call.
00:53I'm sorry, I'm with a very important client. They'll have to wait.
00:56Are you sure? It's really, really important.
00:58There is nothing more important to me right now than this meeting.
01:05Really? Because your mother is dead.
01:12Oh, my God. I don't think she's dead.
01:16She's dead. She was hit by a bus.
01:20She's not dead. This is exactly the kind of thing my mom pulls.
01:23This isn't one of those times. It's the police.
01:27They said it's the worst they've ever seen.
01:30Andy, I'm really sorry about your mother.
01:32My deepest condolences.
01:36Oh, you must take this call.
01:41It's...
01:42Yeah. Um, line one?
01:44Line two.
01:45Oh, okay.
01:49Hi.
01:50It's Daryl.
01:50Aaron told me to pretend to be a cop and say your mom died.
01:53Oh.
01:55Gosh.
01:56Dude.
01:56Thank you, officer.
01:58Look, man, this is a bad idea.
01:59Did she have any last words, or...
02:01Really? That is messed up, man.
02:03Ah, make sure that your client gets the best deal possible.
02:07Wow.
02:08That is so mom.
02:10Mmm.
02:12All right, but thank you, officer.
02:17Aaron, please hold all my other calls.
02:22Where were we?
02:46Hey, Kathy.
02:48Hi.
02:48How's it going? Everything makes sense?
02:50I think everything is under control.
02:51Great.
02:52You should sit down.
02:52Oh, no, I'm fine.
02:53No, I should go fill out my paperwork.
02:56Okay.
03:00Oh, that was just me.
03:02Pregnant Pam.
03:03And it makes sounds much worse than this.
03:06Oh, we know.
03:08I'm training a temp to be my replacement while I'm on maternity leave.
03:12Oh, I should have mentioned I'm pregnant.
03:15You probably didn't notice, because it's impossible to tell because I'm so small.
03:20But, yeah, I'm pregnant.
03:24Oh, come on.
03:26Hey, asking for a friend.
03:28Do you happen to know if that new girl is single?
03:31Mmm, doubt it.
03:33Yeah, me too.
03:36You doubt it.
03:38What's that?
03:39Why do you doubt that she's single?
03:41Honestly, I have no idea.
03:43I just figured we'd save her from Ryan.
03:45Right?
03:45Okay.
03:50What are you doing with my lunch?
03:52I'm delivering it from the fridge.
03:54It's like a porno.
03:55Hey, did anybody order a pizza?
03:57It's not pizza.
03:58Yeah, and we're not about to make love.
04:00I just thought maybe you'd want to eat lunch at your desk today so that during lunch we could go
04:05down to the...
04:05Uh, you tell me.
04:13So, word on the street is she has a boyfriend.
04:15Oh.
04:16Well, she's probably a drug dealer.
04:18That's the best way to land a hot girlfriend.
04:20You just, uh, you get her hooked on blow.
04:22So, it's gonna be nice to have just, like, a healthy, young, fit presence in the middle of the office.
04:28Yeah, aesthetically speaking.
04:30Strictly.
04:30Yeah.
04:31She adds a nice presence.
04:32Good energy.
04:32Yeah.
04:33It's gonna be nice to have someone hot at Pam's desk, huh?
04:36Oh, no, no, no, no.
04:37Not even.
04:38I'm kidding.
04:39Oh, my gosh.
04:40You guys, she's obviously super cute.
04:42I get it.
04:43But I'd like to point out that there is 50 pounds more of me to love if that's your thing.
04:47Pam, you look more beautiful now than ever.
04:49Radiant.
04:50Thank you, guys.
04:51Really, thank you.
04:52Very sweet.
04:52Yeah, you have this sexy glow.
04:55Yeah.
04:55It's one of the most common fetishes.
04:58Really?
04:58Well, thank you all.
04:59No, it's not just pregnant women who don't get their due.
05:01You know who's gorgeous?
05:03Helen Mirren.
05:04Yes.
05:04Yes.
05:05Yes.
05:05Have you seen her in a bikini?
05:07Amazing.
05:08That would be the hottest thing ever is a pregnant Helen Mirren.
05:11Oh.
05:12Okay.
05:13Now we're talking.
05:15Okay.
05:15Okay.
05:16No, no, no.
05:18This is disgusting.
05:19Do you realize what you're saying?
05:20The hottest thing ever would be a 66-year-old pregnant woman.
05:24In this case, yes.
05:25No.
05:26There are universal biological standards of beauty and attraction.
05:30And you are purposefully celebrating the opposite of them to mollycoddle a pregnant woman.
05:36No, we're not.
05:37No.
05:37Yes, you are.
05:38And another thing.
05:39Helen Mirren was born Helen Mirrenov.
05:42That's right.
05:42You're fake salivating over a Soviet-era Russian.
06:01Nice scatting, man.
06:02Thank you.
06:03I think I said dupe instead of boop at one point.
06:06Not bad, fellas.
06:07You're better than you look.
06:08Hey, screw you.
06:12Hey, Robert.
06:13Are we meeting early?
06:14Just taking a stroll.
06:16What exactly have I stumbled upon here?
06:19Well, we're all musicians and we play together sometimes.
06:21You're a band.
06:23Thank you.
06:24We're called Kevin and the Zits.
06:27That was never agreed upon.
06:29I miss being in a band.
06:31What?
06:31Miss no more.
06:32What do you play?
06:33Join us.
06:33I have a tambourine.
06:35Tambourine.
06:36You know I'm the CEO, right?
06:39CEOs don't play tambourines.
06:40Tambourines are for girlfriends.
06:41I play harmonica.
06:42I think I have one in the car.
06:44Great.
06:45Nice.
06:47Guys, Robert is going to be a zit.
06:50Again, never agreed upon.
06:52I had totally given up on hanging out with Robert California,
06:54and now he wants to be in our band.
06:56And when you're in a rock and roll band with somebody,
06:58you're bonded for life.
06:59Usually their life is short and tragic.
07:02That's okay, right?
07:04Yeah, even cooler.
07:06We all got to go sometime.
07:09Hey.
07:10Hey.
07:11Helen Mirren.
07:12Hot?
07:13Yeah.
07:14Super pretty.
07:16Oh.
07:17What about Kathy?
07:19The temp?
07:20Yeah.
07:20Do you think she's hot?
07:21No.
07:22I'm not asking if you're into her.
07:24Just objectively, do you find her attractive?
07:27I'm telling you I don't.
07:28You don't find Kathy attractive?
07:30No, I don't.
07:31No.
07:32I'm not going to tell my nine-months-pregnant wife
07:35that I find her replacement objectively attractive.
07:38Just like I'm not going to tell my two-year-old daughter
07:40that violent video games are objectively more fun.
07:44It's true, but it doesn't help anybody.
07:47Look at her.
07:50Even I want some fries with that shake.
07:53Okay.
07:55Uh, I don't.
07:56So are we good?
08:02That's just absurd.
08:04Yes, because she's hot, right?
08:06Her breasts are large, her waist is small,
08:08her reproductive health and ample evidence,
08:09and facial symmetry.
08:10Come on.
08:12The thing about pregnancy
08:14is people treat you differently.
08:16Like you're a kid, almost.
08:17They lose all sense of boundaries.
08:20They start acting weird,
08:21telling you things that clearly aren't true.
08:24I know it sounds nuts,
08:26but I think Dwight is the only one
08:28who's telling me the truth.
08:31Dwight, am I hot right now?
08:33Why would I or anyone else
08:34think that you're hot right now?
08:35I can't impregnate you,
08:36and that's the driving force
08:37between male-female attraction.
08:39What about before?
08:40Was I attractive before?
08:42Meh.
08:43You were at your most attractive
08:44when you were 24,
08:45with a slight gradual decline,
08:46and a steep drop-off
08:47when you got pregnant for the first time,
08:49gradual recovery,
08:50and, uh, well, now, obviously,
08:52you're at an all-time low.
08:55Hmm.
08:59I think Jim's lying to me
09:00about not being attracted to Kathy.
09:03You think Jim's lying?
09:05That's so cute.
09:06I know he's lying.
09:07Five bucks if you can get him to admit it.
09:09Done.
09:10I never touch a pregnant woman.
09:12Yep, that's the Dwight I need.
09:15If we're gonna work together,
09:17we need some ground rules.
09:18Okay.
09:19Rule one.
09:20Our only loyalty is to the truth.
09:23I think so.
09:24Okay.
09:25Rule two.
09:26We stop at nothing.
09:27Well, what is that?
09:29Is it?
09:29What?
09:30Okay.
09:30Rule three.
09:32Don't fall in love.
09:33Yep, good.
09:35We're gonna bust this guy.
09:36Honesty is very important to me.
09:38So important.
09:39And then we will destroy the man himself.
09:42Let's just see how we feel when we get there.
09:46Well, you came to the right person.
09:47You have to follow your intuition, Pam.
09:49You don't want to end up like Elin Nordergrin.
09:52Actually, what am I saying?
09:53You wish you had her life.
09:54No offense, Pam.
09:54None taken.
09:55What do you got?
09:56It is called the Matchmaker Test,
09:58and it is very powerful.
10:00Basically, we have Pam ask Jim
10:02which of his friends he would set up with Kathy.
10:04If Jim picks a really hot friend,
10:05then we know he thinks that Kathy's hot.
10:10Hmm.
10:20Hey!
10:21You found us.
10:22You guys sound great, man.
10:24Daryl, Andy, Kevin,
10:26this is Curtis Durow, local musician
10:28and the officiant at my wedding.
10:30Local musician, local legend.
10:33I used to come here.
10:34You play every week at the Deerhead.
10:36Dude, you're on TV.
10:38You're the sportscaster on Channel 7.
10:40Go Eagles!
10:42You do that on TV.
10:44You guys mind if they join us?
10:45Yeah, sure.
10:47Guys, I've got some instruments right here.
10:49Hey, why don't you and me play those?
10:52Yeah?
10:52Okay, this is awesome.
10:54What should we play?
10:54Maybe we should warm up with some scales?
10:57Midnight Rambler?
10:58Yeah.
10:59Midnight what?
11:10Midnight what?
11:15Yeah, come on in, baby.
11:20Come on in.
11:24Come on in.
11:25Come on in.
11:25Come on in.
11:26Come on in.
11:27Come on in.
11:28Come on in.
11:29Come on in.
11:30Come on in.
11:30Come on in.
11:31Come on in.
11:31Come on in.
11:32Come on in.
11:32Come on in.
11:34Come on in.
11:34Come on in.
11:36Come on in.
12:08Yeah, because his mom's car's probably not a Nissan Z
12:13Touche
12:16Ew!
12:17Kelly, calm down
12:18I mean, I guess he'd be okay with hair
12:20Okay, you should see if he'll get hair plugs
12:22I don't think Jim cares about his hair
12:23Yeah, but I do, Pam, okay?
12:25It's called being a nice person
12:26I don't see what's so ugly about him
12:27He's got the broad face of a brewer
12:30Jim's on to me
12:31Yeah, Jim barely talks to Mike
12:34We had to go through, like, two levels of friends
12:36to even find his profile
12:38Jim picked someone just unattractive enough
12:40to shove me up without tipping it
12:43Just ugly enough to have deniability
12:45Yep
12:47Mike Tibbetts, he's, like, the most boring-looking guy I know
12:50So if that was for the matchmaker test
12:53I think I'm in the clear
12:55If that wasn't for the matchmaker test
12:57then...
12:58Kathy, he's a really nice guy
13:00Well, Jim may be lying with his words
13:02but he can't lie with his body
13:05I'm gonna write something mean on his wall
13:07No, Kelly, don't
13:08The male reveals attraction
13:10through unconscious and involuntary physical signs
13:13The puffing of the chest
13:16Mirroring
13:16Increased blood flow to the crotch
13:20I say we start there
13:21With the crotch?
13:23With the crotch
13:41Psst
13:42We're not here
13:43Who said that?
13:45Exactly
13:46How'd I get this long triangle?
13:47Okay, just shut up
13:49Is he puffing out his chest?
13:51I can't tell
13:52It's unnaturally sunken
13:56Busted
13:57Oh, busted
13:57He just was mirroring
13:58Did you see that?
13:59No, maybe he just said something funny
14:01Jim has no discernible sense of humor, Pam
14:03You should know that
14:05Well, I think he's just making her laugh
14:06Time for me to find out
14:11Why is he making her laugh so much?
14:13I'm just gonna walk over here
14:15Whoa, whoa
14:15I'm slipping, I'm falling
14:16I'm stumbling
14:17I need something to grab onto
14:18Hey, are you okay?
14:20I'm fine
14:20I'm totally fine
14:21Yes
14:23Why, Jim?
14:25Sorry about that
14:26Oh, crap
14:27I'm just
14:27Dwight
14:30Why?
14:31I'm sorry
14:32I fell down, Mr. Balance
14:43Leave
14:48Does your husband have very soft erections?
14:51Because if not
14:51I just grabbed a very soft penis for nothing
14:55Why was he making her laugh so much?
15:03Oh, hey, I'll just be a second
15:04Yeah, take your time
15:05Okay
15:07Oh, that line from Zoolander
15:10It was from a deleted scene, so we were both right
15:13Told you
15:16Um, do I hand my expense reports to a particular accountant or-
15:20Oscar, Kathy has a question
15:22I'm sorry
15:23Um, I'll just go ask Oscar
15:29Yeah?
15:30You okay?
15:31Why won't you just admit that she's attractive?
15:34It's kind of annoying that you won't say it
15:35Okay, what can I do to make you believe me?
15:38Well, Dwight had this idea and I thought it was kind of crazy, but maybe that's where we are now
15:44She called it crazy?
15:46Oh, man
15:47That's insulting
15:48All I did was propose a makeshift lie detector test
15:51Monitoring his blood pressure, pulse, perspiration, and breathing rate
15:55Yeah, it's nuts
15:56But I don't know what else to do
15:59And she called it nuts?
16:01Seriously, that was hot
16:02I feel like you and the newsman had a groove going
16:05Did you know that Lisa toured with Chaka Khan?
16:08Are you serious?
16:09From Star Trek?
16:11Hey, you caught some of that?
16:13I caught it
16:14What, do you don't like the blues?
16:15I might enjoy seeing you guys play the blues
16:17Well, we are playing
16:19We're all playing together
16:20These are our jam buddies
16:21It's a jam session
16:22We go where the music takes us
16:25I think the music left without you
16:33Come on
16:34Stop shoving me
16:34Stop shoving me
16:35Stop grabbing my penis
16:36Grow up
16:38Take off your jacket
16:39And take a seat
16:41When it lies
16:42The human body exhibits many telltale signs
16:46Really?
16:47This could all go away
16:48If you just tell me the truth
16:49Uh, are you all in line?
16:52Why don't you go check out the sympathy cards, old man?
16:55No, I'm gonna ask you just a few simple questions
16:58Wait for this to constrict
16:59Here we go
17:01Is your name Jim Halpert?
17:04C
17:06Wait, that's it?
17:07That's the question you're gonna ask him?
17:08We have to start with a baseline question to establish what the truth is
17:11You have to share the machine with others
17:15Oh, that's what they taught me in my 19th century kindergarten
17:18Okay, Dwight
17:19Come on
17:20You can go first
17:22Jim, are you serious?
17:27Oh, you know what?
17:28This reminds me, Cece needs a new toothbrush
17:42Maybe we can switch instruments
17:44Yeah, because my body's starting to get bruised
17:48Yeah
17:49Maybe everyone move one instrument to the right
18:01We had to leave because of creative differences
18:04Yeah, they kind of had a specific sound that didn't really fit in with our thing
18:09Guys
18:10Guys, this means they're Kevin and the Zitz now
18:14No, no man
18:16We are
18:19I know, I know, I know
18:21Okay, you're done
18:23I have a new heart, you know
18:24Do you really, Tin Man?
18:26Kay
18:28Where were we?
18:29No, I'm not worried
18:30Because this lie isn't for me, it's for Pam
18:34And when she gets her body back and her confidence back
18:39Yes, I will tell her the truth
18:43That I had feelings for a co-worker today that I haven't had in years
18:52In my defense, he was grabbing my crotch fairly aggressively at the time
18:57Do you find Kathy Sims attractive?
18:59No
19:03Yep, he's lying
19:05See? Was that so hard?
19:06I am not lying
19:08Really?
19:09Pam, are you really going to listen to his stupid homemade test?
19:12I would listen to my homemade test because your husband is definitely lying
19:15In fact, he's lied about every question, even his name
19:19Who are you really?
19:20Wait, what?
19:21Look at the numbers, every single time it's come up 150 over 100
19:24Your husband is a pathological liar
19:26Jim, you have high blood pressure
19:28Oh, he is definitely attracted to her
19:30Doesn't your dad have high blood pressure?
19:32Yeah, but I don't smoke
19:33When was the last time you went to the doctor?
19:34I don't know
19:35It's important to go every month, get your prostate checked
19:37You can do it at home by yourself with your finger, you just stick it right
19:40Wait, stop
19:43I'm not kidding, I mean, I need you to take care of yourself
19:46What would we do if something happened to you?
19:48Okay, easy
19:49Trust me, I'm around for the long haul
19:51It's not really your choice, though, is it?
19:53Death waits for no man
19:55Okay
19:55Come on, let's go
19:56I want to call your doctor
19:59Doesn't it worry you in the slightest that Jim is not his real name?
20:02Just go home, it doesn't matter
20:05Hey, Cece's toothbrush
20:10And you
20:11Oh, baby, I love your way
20:14Every day
20:18Wanna be with you night and day
20:22And day
20:23Oh, baby, I love your way
20:56Ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ru
20:57...
20:58...
21:29...
21:31...
21:36...
21:37...
21:39...
21:40...
21:41...
21:42...
21:43...
21:46...
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