- 2 days ago
Watch The Office Season 8 Episode 10 online in HD on Dailymotion (2025).
Category
🐳
AnimalsTranscript
00:02Christmastime is here!
00:04Wow! Thanks, guys. That sounded amazing.
00:08Hi, I'm Andy Bernard,
00:09and I am the first Office Santa ever
00:12to make holiday wishes come true.
00:15Who's excited to get their holiday wishes?
00:17Holiday wishes.
00:19What's that, Stanley?
00:20We know exactly what holiday you're referring to.
00:23It is important to be mindful of all belief systems
00:26at our holiday party.
00:27I've been here 18 years
00:29and have suffered through some weird thematic Christmases.
00:32A Honolulu Christmas, a Pulp Fiction Christmas,
00:36a Muslim Christmas, Moroccan Christmas,
00:39Mo-Rocka Christmas.
00:41I don't want it.
00:42Christmas is Christmas is Christmas is Christmas.
00:44I got Stanley tickets to see Louis Black for his birthday.
00:49Might not have been the best idea.
00:52I don't want no Kwanzaa Reef.
00:54I don't need a dreidel in my face.
00:55That's its own thing.
00:56And who's that black Santa for?
00:58I don't care.
00:59I know Santa ain't black.
01:01I could care less.
01:03I want Christmas.
01:04Just give me plain baby Jesus,
01:07lying in a manger, Christmas.
01:19What is the status on my wish?
01:21Fulfilled.
01:22Brought my bicycle.
01:23So I can be your designated driver later.
01:25In the event that you drink too much, which is by no means required.
01:29What about my wish that we don't have to attend meetings that degrade our sense of adulthood?
01:32That I cannot do.
01:34But I did get you an acre of property on the moon.
01:38Where?
01:38Dark side or light side?
01:39Light side.
01:40Is it by the sea of tranquility?
01:42As a matter of fact, yes.
01:43Directly adjacent.
01:45Beach front.
01:46Thank you, Andy.
01:47So whose wish is next?
01:49Oh, what about Santa's wish?
01:51My biggest wish is that you all get along well with Jessica.
01:57Come on, guys. Jessica?
01:59Jim, tell them who Jessica is.
02:01She's not your grandmother, is she?
02:03Gam Gam's name is Ruth, Jim.
02:05You should know.
02:05I introduced you on speakerphone that time.
02:08Jessica is my super serious girlfriend who is seriously awesome and seriously sexy.
02:13Only thing that's not serious, by the way, our repartee.
02:16That's great.
02:17When you know, you know.
02:18Hey, what's Ruth's deal, man?
02:20Totally out of your league.
02:21So in summation, ho ho ho, please be nice to Jessica, and mistletoe is not an excuse for sexual assault.
02:28And don't go near Gam Gam.
02:32I love Jessica, and I haven't even met her yet.
02:34It's like, we don't even need to meet, you know?
02:37I already love you.
02:38Stay home.
02:41I just want you to know that I will be mean to Jessica if you want to be.
02:44Oh, no, no, it's fine, Kelly.
02:45It's really no problem.
02:46I was already planning on being mean to her.
02:48Jessica, I don't want you to do that.
02:50Hello?
02:52Merry Christmas, Aaron.
02:54Kelly, happy Pancha Ganapati.
02:57Ew, what is that?
02:58The five-day Hindu celebration in December honoring the God Ganesh patron of the arts.
03:04Cool.
03:05Hey, man.
03:06Hey, ho!
03:07How you holding up?
03:09Because of your wife leaving you?
03:11Kevin?
03:12I actually appreciate the human intimacy.
03:15I feel like a kitten being cradled by a gorilla.
03:18Yeah.
03:19It's been ten days since I had sexual intercourse.
03:22Well, you came to the right place.
03:25This party will cheer you right up.
03:27I hope so.
03:28The corporate party was wretched.
03:30I am so tired of the Black Eyed Peas.
03:34It's rock and roll for people who don't like rock and roll.
03:36It's rap for people who don't like rap.
03:39It's pop for people who don't like pop.
03:44Heartbreaking.
03:45I have to take my Santa hat off and put on my hard ass hat, but this is serious.
03:54It's come to my attention that somebody who shall remain nameless wants to switch desk
03:59clumps.
04:00Fine with me.
04:01Jim can leave anytime he wants.
04:02Goodbye.
04:03It wasn't me.
04:03It wasn't either of you.
04:05Kathy wants to leave our clump.
04:07Don't look.
04:09Who it was is not important.
04:11But she did say that your constant pranking and one-upsmanship is driving her crazy.
04:16She or he.
04:16I just want to say this is not my fault.
04:19Okay?
04:19The weak always bully the strong.
04:21Contrary to what you see in the media.
04:23I am always acting in self-defense.
04:25Occasionally preemptive self-defense.
04:29Hey!
04:30Hey!
04:30Respect the hat!
04:32Pam never seemed to have a problem with this.
04:34Alright.
04:35I'm going to speak in a language you both understand.
04:38Monet.
04:40What was it?
04:41What is it?
04:42Money.
04:43You both have sizable Christmas bonuses coming your way.
04:46If I catch either of you messing with the other, I will give both bonuses to the other
04:50person.
04:51Can't do that.
04:51No.
04:52Absolutely not.
04:53You need consequences.
04:54Okay?
04:55I want you both walking on eggshells.
05:00Hi.
05:01I'm Jessica.
05:02I'm looking for Andy.
05:03Jessica.
05:04Yes.
05:05We don't say hi.
05:05We hug.
05:09I'm Erin.
05:10Oh!
05:11Sorry.
05:12I hope you feel really welcome.
05:14We all want you here.
05:15Oh.
05:15My ex is meeting my sex.
05:19Which is always scary.
05:20You know?
05:21And not just because you think they might talk about your penis.
05:25That's just part of it.
05:27Hey!
05:28Jess!
05:28Erin!
05:29I hope you're not talking about my penis.
05:31Hi.
05:31Hi.
05:32Mwah.
05:32Hey everyone.
05:33I want you to meet Jessica.
05:35She is an assistant cross country coach at Bryn Mahr.
05:38Wow.
05:39Erin, by the way, amazing receptionist.
05:42Oh, that's great.
05:44Backbone of the office.
05:45Which is funny, actually, because my spine is a mess.
05:48What?
05:49Scoliosis.
05:50I had to wear a back brace for three years, but I never did.
05:55Oh, no.
05:56Oh.
05:57Oh.
05:58Uh-oh.
05:59It's kicking in.
06:00Spontaneous scoliosis.
06:01Spontaneous scoliosis.
06:06Oh.
06:07This thing can take your arm off, your head off.
06:09All right.
06:09You know, just exercise caution.
06:11Thank you.
06:11All right.
06:12All right.
06:14Oh, yeah.
06:15And, um, there's a Christmas party upstairs tonight.
06:18What to tell you about?
06:19Isn't that just for popsicles?
06:21Popsicles?
06:21Yeah, like upstairs people, because you've got to stick up your butt.
06:24Ah.
06:25See, I thought it was because they're all so rich they could eat popsicles all the time.
06:30What?
06:31I, in my, I...
06:32Well, you should definitely come.
06:33The foreman always comes.
06:35Plus, it's fun.
06:36You know, cookies, smoke fish, alcohol.
06:39People acting stupid.
06:40You had me at clookies.
06:41I can't wait to find out what they are.
06:44What should I wear?
06:46Oh, it's nice.
06:47It's real nice.
06:47People get dressed up.
06:48I will look so handsome for you, Daryl.
07:02Uh...
07:02I'll just...
07:09Dwight really wants my bonus.
07:12He's trying to entrap me.
07:15Oh, God, no, I can't drink at this thing.
07:20I get really pranky when I drink.
07:22Erin, what can I get for you?
07:24Uh, do you have cola?
07:26Kirkland, if you have it.
07:27Why would you come to a bar and ask for cola when you can get some from the kitchen?
07:31Did some small part of you want something a little stronger?
07:35Ryan, Kevin, Phyllis, Oscar, come and take these shots.
07:39Yes!
07:41Will do.
07:42The fifth one is for you, Erin.
07:44You can take it or leave it.
07:46To take it would be to accept that you're at a party and you're an adult woman.
07:51You have an adventurous spirit.
07:53To leave it would be fine, too.
07:55One, two, three!
07:57Yes!
07:57Okay.
07:58Mmm!
08:00Wow!
08:02Woo!
08:03Woo!
08:03Timothee Christmas!
08:05Timothee Christmas, indeed!
08:07Hit her up.
08:08Oh, yes!
08:09Woo!
08:09Yeah!
08:10Wow!
08:14Uh, yeah, I just got my replacement credit card.
08:18Do you want the number?
08:19Oh, it's, uh, 4793-0032-3313.
08:27The security code is 927.
08:31Okay, great.
08:32Thank you very much.
08:33Bye.
08:38So, Dwight did take the bait.
08:41He used my credit card numbers to send a $200 bouquet of flowers to my wife.
08:49From me.
08:56Look, it's Christmas, so you're allowed to do it at home.
09:02You're allowed to do it at home.
09:07A little cookie.
09:09I meant dressed up compared to normal.
09:12You're usually dressed like a Ghostbuster.
09:14Okay.
09:15I thought you'd wear a sweater.
09:16Since when does a sweater mean dressed up?
09:18Am I your grandson?
09:19Come on, stay, alright?
09:20It's good for people to get to know you.
09:22As a contestant on Dancing with the Stars, maybe.
09:25I want my sugar-free cookie.
09:28And then I want a sugar cookie.
09:31And then I want my nap.
09:33That's right.
09:34Thank you.
09:35She is remarkable.
09:38Edgy impressions.
09:40Thank you.
09:41How many drinks have you had tonight?
09:42I can't be driving everybody home.
09:44A thousand?
09:46Whoa.
09:46Maybe you should take a break.
09:49Maybe you should mind your own business.
09:53Just kidding.
09:58Ah, I've been attacked!
09:59Oh my God!
10:00Ah, someone put a porcupine in my drawer!
10:03Oh my God.
10:04Yeah, I was just sitting here at my desk.
10:06And I reached into my drawer to grab my toothbrush and some tooth powder.
10:10And all of a sudden, I was attacked by this bloodthirsty, rabid creature.
10:15I wonder, in this office, who has access to a porcupine?
10:18Or who in this office knows that I have access and is trying to set me up?
10:24Hmm.
10:24You know, this sounds a lot like the premise of my latest Chad Flanderman novel,
10:28A Murder for Framing.
10:30Chad Flanderman.
10:31Just an easy-going black guy who knows the streets, yet he also went to Oxford.
10:37So, just as comfortable on a motorcycle as he is on Air Force One.
10:43Oh, and he's also the world's leading Egyptologist.
10:46Toby, nobody cares about your sex-crazed black detective.
10:51No, no, no, no, no. Women chase him. He misses his wife.
10:54Hello! Lacerated hand here, folks.
10:56Nice try. This is ridiculous.
10:58Oh, is it really?
10:59Two separate times, you have set me up to believe that I was being recruited by the CIA.
11:04Three times.
11:04You see? Jim, this has your fingerprints all over it.
11:07Andy, you've got to be kidding me.
11:09Fingerprints can be planted, you know, with a severed hand.
11:12Do you think that's what happened? Do you think you used a severed hand?
11:14Okay. You know what? Why don't we just call animal control?
11:16You might want to run that by Angela, because it's so cute.
11:20No. Porcupines don't have souls. They're like dogs.
11:23Yes, I'm calling from Dunder Mifflin. We have a very rabid porcupine in our office.
11:27Someone should come pick it up.
11:28Come down right away.
11:29Uh, I don't know. Let me ask. Were you quilled?
11:32Yes, I was quilled.
11:32And what's his name?
11:33Henrietta.
11:34Oh.
11:35What?
11:37All right. Get her out of here, Dwight.
11:48Hey. Guys, I just wanted to say, come here.
11:54Oh, okay. I'm so happy you guys are together.
11:57Okay.
11:58And you both have such beautiful hair.
12:01Thank you.
12:03I hope you guys get married.
12:05And who knows, maybe at the wedding I meet someone.
12:08Okay.
12:09And later on tonight, I hope I see you guys kiss.
12:16Ah!
12:17Yay!
12:18Okay, well, I'm gonna go do another reverse spit.
12:21That's how the cool kids say, get a drink.
12:28That's, uh, that's the girl you dated.
12:31Um, yeah, she's not always like that.
12:34It's, um...
12:35No, she seems fun.
12:38Yeah, uh, excuse me.
12:40Okay.
12:40Yeah.
12:42Hey.
12:43Hey.
12:43Hey.
12:43Have you had anything to eat besides candy canes?
12:46Every martini has an olive.
12:48Okay.
12:49Maybe I should make you some oatmeal or something.
12:51I don't want to put you out, but if someone's making oatmeal, I'll take an apple cinnamon and a maple
12:56brown sugar in one bowl with whole milk.
12:59Hey, I never told you my Christmas wish.
13:01Okay.
13:02It's about you.
13:03That's not what it should be.
13:05It should just be like a trinket or something.
13:07It's that I wish Jessica was dead.
13:11You, you, you mean you wish she wasn't here or something?
13:14I wish she was in a graveyard.
13:17Under the ground.
13:19With worms coming out of her mouth.
13:22Hey, you know, you can't say that.
13:24Okay?
13:25That's my girlfriend that you're talking about.
13:27You and I are not together anymore.
13:30You need to get over it.
13:32Take your wish back.
13:34Too late.
13:35It's already been wished.
13:36And you promised it would come true.
13:38You wrote it in an email.
13:40So, which one are you?
13:43A murderer or a liar?
13:53Hey.
13:54Hey.
13:55So, there was talk of oatmeal.
14:02You know, don't listen to what anyone is saying.
14:05You look like a princess.
14:08Yeah.
14:09Thanks.
14:11I swear, I was too embarrassed.
14:14Hey guys, sorry to interrupt.
14:16I just found this on my desk and need to talk to somebody about it.
14:20Can you believe that?
14:21Is that Cece?
14:22Yes, it is.
14:23Ugh.
14:24That's awful.
14:24Yes, it is.
14:25Cece is Jim's daughter.
14:27Oh my God.
14:28How could somebody do that?
14:29I know.
14:30I mean, the way I see it is you can deface any picture of me.
14:32Anyone.
14:32Pick one.
14:33Not my kid, though.
14:34Who did this?
14:34Who did this?
14:35Do you know who did this?
14:36I know who did this.
14:38Dwight.
14:39Dwight?
14:40No.
14:40He should pay.
14:41Yeah, he is gonna pay.
14:42This is fireable.
14:43Okay.
14:44Let me just see it one more time.
14:46You know what?
14:48I know who my friends are now.
14:50But I shouldn't have got you involved.
14:51Because the truth is, I don't even really care about this picture.
14:54It's a little out of focus.
14:55It was probably an accident, right?
14:56Like...
14:57That's no accident.
14:58Right.
14:59You're right.
14:59So maybe it was me who did it.
15:01By accident.
15:02What?
15:03I'll figure it out.
15:04Get to the bottom of it.
15:05Merry, merry.
15:09Never this garbage.
15:13This is Christmas.
15:16Never this garbage.
15:27This is Christmas.
15:35For sure.
15:36I'll figure it out.
15:38My mom did a thing.
15:40Please.
15:44Just a procrastinate.
15:45I'll figure it out.
15:45Bye-bye.
15:45Bye-bye.
15:45Bye-bye.
15:45Bye-bye.
15:45Bye-bye.
15:47Bye-bye.
15:49Bye-bye.
15:50Bye-bye.
15:51Bye-bye.
15:53Bye.
15:53Bye-bye.
17:04All right, I will definitely do that
17:06All right, I'll tell Dwight
17:08You know what? You're sitting and thinking
17:10And it's probably better if it comes from me anyway
17:13Christmas miracles do happen
17:15Yes, they totally do
17:19You can't click on these Kardashian links
17:21That's why you have so many viruses
17:22Well, help me, okay?
17:24I'm trying, but you need to
17:25Come here
17:27Game on
17:27On it
17:37Jessica, did you just fart?
17:42And that is how it's done
17:44I would like another alcohol
17:46Let's you and I take a walk
17:48Oscar, you're in charge of the bar
17:49What?
17:50I haven't bartended in forever
17:52Oh, I've never considered myself a mixologist
17:55Oh, this is daunting
17:57Um, I need a mortar, pestle, muddler
17:59Does anyone have any chocolate shavings?
18:03Your heart is broken
18:04So is mine
18:05And?
18:07And what?
18:09And do you have any advice or anything
18:10Oh, my God
18:11Help me feel better?
18:13I've been married thrice
18:15And each has ended in a macrimony as a divorce
18:17I'm not sure I'm the best person to give love advice
18:21I was hoping you were going to make me feel better
18:24When you do your makeup
18:25Uh-huh
18:26How long does it take usually?
18:28Um, it depends
18:31Chad Flenderman's kryptonite
18:32Whoa, we got a real Clarence Thompson
18:35My mom is here
18:39Hi
18:43I'll see you at home?
18:44Okay, great
18:44Okay
18:44Perfect
18:45Bye
18:47I still don't get why you can't just call her a cab and pay for it
18:50I would, it just, that wasn't the holiday wish
18:53Either he drives or I drive
18:55And now I'm drunk and mad
18:59Bye
18:59Okay, bye
19:02Alright, come on, Meredith
19:04Bye
19:08Thank God Erin's getting a ride home with Robert
19:10Because she is trashed
19:12And who better to drive her home than Robert?
19:14I mean, what a stand-up guy
19:16You know
19:17I mean, he's going through a lot
19:18Separating from his wife
19:20Showing up to the Christmas party in a tracksuit
19:22And a blazer
19:26Let's go
19:27Let's go, let's go
19:28I'm coming
19:28Let's go
19:29Okay, okay, okay
19:30I'm coming, I'm coming
19:31Hang on
19:31Alright
19:33Whoa, my stuff!
19:34What is all that?
19:36It's my valuables
19:37It's junk
19:38It's my treasures
19:39No, they're my treasures
19:40You're a hoarder
19:40No, I'm not!
19:42I'm going to sell it on eBay
19:43No, no, no
19:44You be careful
19:45Be careful
19:46Ah, my Santa suit's stuck
19:52What are we going to do with all that bonus money, Henrietta?
19:56Huh?
19:57Where are we?
19:58This ain't my street
19:59Shh, shh, shh, shh
20:01Oh, this is the posh part of town, huh?
20:07Oh, my God
20:10I wonder what a studio condo would cost in this neighborhood
20:13Meredith, shut your drug hole right now
20:18Aaron, it was great fun tonight
20:21Take a few aspirin, drink a whole lot of water
20:23Sleep in it in the morning
20:27Thank you
20:29Good night
20:34What are you smiling for?
20:37Are you thinking I'm going to run with anything?
20:40I am sure I am not
20:43Let's get you home
20:46Ow!
20:49You can get it easy
20:50Woo!
20:56Hey, guys
20:57I feel refreshed now
20:59How's it going?
21:00Dwight?
21:01Took a little nap right next to Jim's desk
21:03I feel so good right now
21:05Mmm, cookies
21:07What's everyone staring at?
21:10Oh, man
21:11I was supposed to tell Dwight something
21:14Come on, Jim
21:18I got nothing
21:20What's anything
21:21Go on, Jim
21:22What's up, Jim?
21:48I´m going to waste the episode
21:48Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
Comments