- 5 days ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:01On the Dukes!
00:03With 30%, you also get my, uh, protection.
00:07I don't scare you easy.
00:10Boss won't pay protection. Daisy's in love.
00:14The Dukes are on the spot.
00:19And if that weren't enough, here come the Oak Ridge Boys.
00:34Just a good old boy.
00:38Never meaning no harm.
00:42Beats all you never saw.
00:44Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born.
00:49Straightening the curves.
00:52Flatening the hills.
00:56Someday the mountain might get them, but the law never will.
01:01Making their way the only way they know how.
01:08That's just a little bit more than the law will allow.
01:13Just a good old boy.
01:17Wouldn't change if they could.
01:21Fighting the system like a true modern-day Robin Hood.
01:26Yee-haw!
01:30You know, it's hard to say whether old Bo and Luke are in a hurry or not.
01:33They always drive like that.
01:38Would you take it easy? Uncle Jesse didn't say nothing about delivering that tax return air mail, you know.
01:42If we don't make that last mail pick up today, it's gonna have to wait till Monday.
01:47I can never figure out why Uncle Jesse always wants us to get that thing out so dang early.
01:51Well, you see, the last time Jesse paid his taxes late, he had to pay an interest charge of $3.
01:57Old Jesse took a personal exception to that.
01:59Hey, look who we caught up with.
02:05Ha-ha-ha!
02:07Ha-ha-ha!
02:40We're just nuts!
02:45Hey.
02:46Uh-huh.
02:47Are those friends of yours I just see fly by now?
02:49Huh?
02:52Oh, uh, uh, Bo and Luke?
02:54No, they're just my cousins, and they do that all the time for fun.
02:58Excuse me, Daisy, remember us, Bo and Luke?
03:01Two fellas you almost killed?
03:02Hey, my fault, fellas.
03:04Never thought this little thing here would cause this much trouble.
03:06Just looking for a ride into Hazard.
03:08Oh, let's go. Here, I'll help you.
03:10Here, let me help you.
03:11Travel heavy, huh?
03:12Yeah.
03:15I really appreciate this.
03:17Oh, it's my pleasure.
03:20Yeah.
03:22Eat between the ditches.
03:25You get the feeling Daisy's running kind of a high fever over that fella?
03:29Well, she does have the same look you get every time you see something in skirts.
03:34Come on.
03:35What brings a Texas boy to Hazard County?
03:38Financially, Hazard is the end of the line for me.
03:41What line of work are you in?
03:43Pretty handy around cars.
03:45Oh, I know a job that might be arranged for you.
03:48You do?
03:48Yeah.
03:49Well, you hear that, Thumb?
03:50You hitched us into one lucky day.
03:53Name's Earl Beckett.
03:54Daisy Dick.
03:55Hi.
03:56Hi.
04:07Well, J.W., why don't you just stick to your being boss of Clearwich County, and I'll just stick to
04:15my being boss of Heather County.
04:17Let me just explain my proposition to you.
04:19Oh, come on, there's no need to explain nothing.
04:22I already know it by heart.
04:24I mean, every year, it's always the same proposition from you, and always, every year, I give you the same
04:29answer.
04:30No.
04:30Now, why don't you just stop wasting your time and mine?
04:33And mine?
04:34Your time don't count.
04:35Oh, of course, Flash.
04:37He didn't mean to yell at your daddy.
04:39J.D., how about 30% for everything, hmm?
04:43Now, they include your hijack operation, shine operation, chop shop, bull's nest, etc., and etc.
04:50Yeah?
04:51Well, why should I take 30% when I'm already making 100%?
04:56Because with 30%, you also get my, uh, protection.
05:01I'm offering you the chance to retire, one way or another.
05:05Well, not me.
05:07And if you don't believe me, you can just show up here Saturday and take a listen to my state
05:12of the county address,
05:13because it's going to be all about my plans for Heather County for the next, oh, 10, 20, 30 years
05:19or more.
05:19Well, I'm sorry you feel that way about my offer, J.D.,
05:23because I don't think I'm going to be inclined to be making it again.
05:27Oh, you will, J.W., you most certainly will.
05:30Shall we say, uh, same time next year?
05:34Rollo!
05:37Good, good.
05:39You're that big, fat Jolo, what?
05:41Good, J.W.
05:45You know what I think?
05:47I think we should show Boss Hawk just how much he does need me.
05:51A little persuasion, if you will.
05:57Hey, Cooter.
05:58Hey, Daisy.
05:59How you doing, gal?
06:01Oh, good.
06:02Cooter Davenport, I like to get to meet Earl Beckett.
06:04He's from Texas.
06:06Nope.
06:06Got it.
06:07My pleasure.
06:07Nice to meet you.
06:08See you.
06:09Look at here now.
06:11Sound like the general got a case of the rocking pneumonia
06:13and the boogie-woogie flu.
06:15What's the trouble?
06:16We don't really know yet.
06:18He's running fine until this waitress from the boar's nest
06:20runs us off the road in her Jeep.
06:23What y'all doing uptown?
06:25We brought Jesse's tax money in the mail.
06:27Hey, is Uncle Jesse paying Uncle Sammy in cash again this year?
06:30Oh, yes, Uncle Cootie.
06:32Cooter, I got an intimate understanding
06:34with every nut and bolt in that car,
06:35but I need a second expert opinion.
06:38Y'all, I'd get right on it,
06:39but right now I am up to my gizzard and crankshafts.
06:42Well, Cooter, Earl can't help you.
06:44He's looking for a job,
06:45and I told him you were looking for someone to hire.
06:47Daisy, I ain't taking anybody on right now.
06:49No, Cooter, you just said you got more sick cars here
06:51than you know what to do with.
06:53Yeah, but Daisy...
06:54Come on, Cooter.
06:55Well, would you look at this?
06:56What you got?
06:57What?
06:58Well, looks like all that's wrong here
07:00is your ballast resistors is cracked and shortened out.
07:03Cooter?
07:03Well, you know, I reckon I could use some part-time help.
07:06Part-time's fine, Cooter.
07:08Earl, you just said you're supposed to go.
07:09So we better get that tax form over the post office.
07:11Yeah.
07:12No, I thought you had it.
07:13Say, any cheap room in houses around here?
07:15Well, sure.
07:16Cooter's got a room right over his garage.
07:18It goes with the jobs.
07:20Maybe we'll lift it on the kitchen table?
07:23Well, if it ain't there,
07:24you and me is going to uncle Jesse $40.20.
07:27Plus, we better get another form,
07:29just in case, over at City Hall.
07:30We'll see y'all later.
07:32Bye.
07:32I'll take it easy.
07:34Well, I'll grab my suitcase.
07:36Hey, listen.
07:36I'll help you unpack.
07:40Okay.
07:41It's this way.
07:42Much obliged, Cooter.
07:43One of these days,
07:44I'm going to learn how to say no.
07:47Okay.
07:47It's right up here.
07:48I think you might like it.
07:52Would you look at that?
07:54How you suppose to belong to this one?
07:56Well, if I was to hazard a guess,
07:58I'd say somebody rich.
08:00And I'd say that's a mighty fine guess.
08:03Well, bless my soul.
08:04Boss Hickman, ain't it?
08:06What'd they do?
08:07Run you out of Clearidge County?
08:08Let's see.
08:11Hey, boss.
08:12Hey, boss.
08:13Come here.
08:13Come here.
08:15Roscoe, why do you always keep interrupting me just as I'm starting my coffee break?
08:19Well, I want you to look at something.
08:22You see those Duke boys talking to that boss Hickman?
08:25Yeah, so what?
08:26Well, look, will you just forget all about it?
08:28Hmm?
08:29And you too.
08:29Listen.
08:30What I want you and Cleetis to concentrate on
08:33is getting Hazard Square all prettied up
08:35for my annual state of the county address.
08:39Which is going to be next Saturday.
08:41Now,
08:42I want to have plenty of flags
08:44and banners and streamers
08:46and lots of posters
08:47with a name J.D. Hogg on them
08:49and big red letters.
08:51Oh, don't worry about things
08:52because the boss will spare no expense.
08:54Oh, yes, you will.
08:56Out of corner,
08:57you're going to use the same banners and posters
08:59from my state of the county speech last year.
09:02Here.
09:04Now, move him.
09:06We'll just take a little piece right there.
09:11See, this is a mighty good appetizer.
09:14I wonder what I should have for my main car.
09:16It's not real good.
09:18How are you?
09:19How are you?
09:19Good stuff.
09:20Thank you, Daisy.
09:21Good stuff.
09:28Don't worry about him, Daisy.
09:30Earl will be here.
09:31Just worry.
09:35This Earl fella,
09:37is he worth spilling beer over?
09:39Well, if you're asking
09:41if he's a responsible sort,
09:42I'd say yes.
09:43Well,
09:44next time I've got an income tax
09:46returned to mail-in,
09:48I'll give it to him to mail for me.
09:51$40.20.
09:52Just gone with the wind.
09:54I've got to go back
09:55through all them forms
09:56and figure out
09:57how I arrived
09:57at $40.20.
09:59Uncle Jesse,
10:00I know we had it
10:00when we left the farm.
10:03Cooler.
10:04Hey, Daisy.
10:05What's it all?
10:05What's up?
10:06Didn't he come with you?
10:07Yeah, well, he's...
10:08He said he was gonna.
10:09Cooler, you got him
10:09working overtime, ain't you?
10:10Just hang on, Daisy.
10:12He's right behind me.
10:13He was right behind me.
10:14Hey!
10:16Earl.
10:17Hey, how you doing?
10:18Hey.
10:18Hi.
10:19How's the job?
10:20All's going just fine.
10:21Oh, good?
10:21I'm so glad.
10:23Yeah.
10:23Everything's good, honey.
10:24Oh, yeah.
10:25Hanging in there.
10:25Oh, you met my cousins.
10:27Now I want you
10:27to meet my Uncle Jesse.
10:28Hey.
10:29This is Earl.
10:30Earl, good to meet you.
10:31Good drop a chair.
10:32Drop a chair, Jordan.
10:33Hey, Earl.
10:34Hey.
10:34Earl, this beer's
10:35on the house, honey.
10:36Oh, thank you.
10:37Daisy, you let boss hear
10:38he's saying that.
10:39You're going to be
10:39asking Cooter
10:39for a job yourself.
10:44You better slow it down, Flash.
10:45I'll get you for speeding.
10:46Earl, you better
10:47drink that beer fast, man,
10:48over there in the white suit
10:49and smell a non-paying
10:50customer a mile away.
10:51Yes, he do.
10:52You.
10:53I think you just better
10:54have a very long,
10:55serious talk
10:55with these boys of yours.
10:56What?
10:57Out of color,
10:58they've been keeping
10:58very bad company lately.
11:01Yeah.
11:01You boys been hanging out
11:02with J.D. Hawk.
11:05Listen, you old boy,
11:06we ain't talking
11:07about boss hog,
11:08we're talking about
11:08that fat little boss
11:10Hickman over
11:10at Claridge County.
11:11Yeah, that's who.
11:12We saw Bo and Luke Duke
11:13talking to him
11:14real friendly
11:15like just this morning.
11:16Oh, friendly like it.
11:17Wasn't that
11:17that we had all of them?
11:19No, sir,
11:19it sure as heck
11:19wasn't friendly,
11:20not with that old polecat.
11:21Well, birds of a feather,
11:23et cetera, et cetera,
11:23I always say.
11:24Yeah, it's birds
11:25of a feather flocked together.
11:26I know what it is.
11:28We all know what it is.
11:29Well, I didn't know
11:29how about a dance.
11:31And who are you?
11:31Yeah, well, this is Earl, Bob.
11:33Well, don't you know
11:33we got a rule around here?
11:35The employees
11:35never dance
11:36with a customer.
11:37You also got another rule
11:38that says
11:39the customer's always right.
11:40Yeah.
11:41Well, he ain't a customer
11:43till he pays
11:44for that beer.
11:45What'd I tell you?
11:46Man's got a nose
11:47like a blue tech hound.
12:00I wonder what in the world
12:02could cause that to happen.
12:03A bomb could cause that to happen.
12:07Turtle bean.
12:08Yeah, that's good.
12:08And the who that made it happen
12:10is G.W. Hinton, that's who.
12:11Is this way of showing me
12:12I need protection?
12:13You definitely need protection.
12:15What's this?
12:19What is it?
12:20Yeah, it says
12:21Jesse due
12:22to the Internal Revenue
12:23Service Center,
12:25Washington, D.C.
12:26Zero nine...
12:28Wait a minute.
12:29This here's a tax return
12:30we were supposed to mail
12:31for Uncle Jesse.
12:31I thought we lost that thing.
12:33You sure did lose it.
12:34And you know when?
12:35When you were setting up
12:36that bomb in there.
12:37Oh, come on, boss.
12:38We never did that.
12:39You're kidding.
12:39Roscoe and me
12:40seen you conspiring
12:41with J.W. Hinton.
12:43And now we know
12:44what you were conspiring about,
12:46don't we?
12:47That's right.
12:48All right,
12:48now we've got the evidence.
12:50You boys are under arrest.
12:51Just freeze!
12:54J.D.
12:55Why don't you tell Roscoe
12:58to put that peace shooter away?
13:00You know these boys
13:01don't go around
13:01setting off bombs?
13:03Yeah.
13:03Well, this letter's
13:04the evidence that say they did.
13:06Yeah.
13:06Or maybe you did it.
13:08If I click a timer.
13:11I don't care what Duke
13:13can I put your jail to me?
13:14Hey, hold on, y'all.
13:15Listen.
13:16What?
13:16Do something?
13:16Is that a thing?
13:17It's another bomb.
13:18Hit the jack.
13:18Come on!
13:26Roscoe, do you hear anything?
13:28No.
13:29And I don't think
13:30we're gonna hear anything either,
13:31do you?
13:32No.
13:33In other words,
13:34them Duke boys
13:34all swallowed you again,
13:36didn't they?
13:36Well, you might say that,
13:37but I just...
13:38Oh, oh, oh.
13:39I hear something ticking.
13:40It's a ticking.
13:41What?
13:41What?
13:41Where?
13:42Your watch.
13:42The bomb's in your watch.
13:44You just...
13:44No, no, no, don't do that!
13:46After them Duke boys!
13:48Where do you go after them?
13:50Let's get going!
13:51Did you see the Duke boys?
13:53Yeah, sure.
13:54They just wait for me.
13:54What happened?
13:55What?
13:56Where do you go after them?
13:57You dipped me.
13:58And you dipped me.
13:59Come with me.
14:00Come on out here.
14:02We're in hot pursuit.
14:03Get in your vehicle.
14:04Let's go.
14:04Come on.
14:05Good, good.
14:06Boom.
14:34All right, cut through Sand Creek Road.
14:35Around the next bend here.
14:50Those misty's ain't our day.
14:55Hazard County is the only county
14:57where the ditch diggers
14:58get combat pay.
15:11Smooth.
15:13Well, anything they can do,
15:15we can do.
15:15We can?
15:30Let's get out of here.
15:36Glash!
15:37Glash!
15:37You all right?
15:38That's smart.
15:39Sneaking a snooze.
15:42You're also sure a smart man.
15:45But I think he needs still more persuading.
15:48You know what to do next.
15:50Not a soul in town suspects me,
15:52so consider it done.
15:55You're a good man, Earl.
16:04So near as I can figure.
16:06Tax form must have blown out of the general.
16:08We was chasing Daisy around this morning.
16:10Yeah.
16:11Whoever found it used it to frame us
16:12for bombing Boss's office.
16:15That don't make no sense.
16:16Who'd do it?
16:17What for?
16:18Shepard the lost sheep.
16:19Shepard the lost sheep.
16:20Do you read me?
16:21Come back.
16:23We're here, Shepard.
16:24What do you got?
16:25How you boys doing?
16:26You holding together out there?
16:28Yeah, we're fine.
16:29Now, you boys didn't have nothing to do
16:32with that bombing,
16:33and we can prove it.
16:34How you gonna do that, Shepard?
16:36Well, Daisy and me,
16:37and Cooter and that fellow Earl,
16:39we was all sitting right there,
16:41and you fellas didn't go near Boss's office,
16:43and we'll tell him so right to his fat little face.
16:46Now, listen.
16:47Daisy's over at Cooter's with that fellow Earl.
16:49You click them and meet me at the city hall.
16:51I'm gone.
16:53Now, the last time old Boss Hogg ever listened to Reason
16:55was when the R.S. artist did his books.
16:58Both sets.
16:59I think your daddy was a jackrabbit.
17:02Don't get mad.
17:03Don't snap.
17:04Daddy's got to go to work now.
17:05Lay your head down.
17:06Now, that I like.
17:10Yes, sir, Reebok.
17:12A whole load of electric typewriter, eh?
17:15Well, that should bring a pretty penny.
17:17Or even more.
17:17Good work on your part.
17:19Now then,
17:21you better change the license plates on that van
17:23before you drop the stuff off
17:25at the usual place.
17:27You hear me, man?
17:27No, not this time, Boss.
17:29You sure changed me too many times.
17:31This time, I want 50 cents on the dollar up front,
17:34or I will not deliver.
17:3550 cents up front?
17:37Now, wait a minute.
17:38That's Highway Robbery.
17:39Well, sure enough it is,
17:41but that's what I do for a living, ain't it now?
17:43I'll be in front of City Hall in five minutes.
17:46You better be there with the money ready,
17:48or I will dump these typewriters
17:49right out on the pavement.
17:52In front, dealer!
17:53You just can't...
17:56Hello!
17:56Hello!
17:59I just don't believe it.
18:01My own man doesn't trust me.
18:03Oh, that makes me mad, you know.
18:06There ought to be honor among thieves.
18:08What is there?
18:09Friends.
18:09There ought to be honor among friends.
18:10Yeah, I hope you meant that.
18:11Yeah, I meant death.
18:12All right, all right, I'm gonna pay him.
18:14Oh.
18:14But then,
18:15you're just gonna have to get me a new hijacker.
18:17Well, I can't advertise in the newspaper, you know.
18:21They don't run ads in those yellow pages, you know.
18:24Would you turn around, please?
18:26And get that mother of yours to avert her eyes, too.
18:29Oh.
18:30And stuff up her ears
18:31so she can't hear these little clits.
18:33Oh, Flash,
18:35do what boss home tells you to.
18:37Oh, look.
18:38Look at that.
18:39That's cool.
18:41All right, all right, all right.
18:42I gotta go now
18:43and give him the money
18:45before anybody finds out
18:46what's inside that truck.
18:48Or else I'm gonna have me a pick of trouble.
18:50Oh, yeah,
18:51they'd be a lot of trouble
18:52if they have a pick of...
18:53Oh, Flash!
18:54Flash!
18:55Steve!
18:57Cool, she did it.
18:59There we go.
19:02Daisy,
19:03now how do you expect a feller to do his work
19:05with a pretty girl like you
19:06standing over him smiling?
19:09I'll tell you.
19:10Say, any word from Bo and Luke?
19:11I don't know.
19:12Uncle Jesse's back at the farm
19:13trying to reach him.
19:14Well, shouldn't you be with him?
19:15No!
19:16Hey, how come you're not at work?
19:18Earl, Beckett,
19:18are you trying to get rid of me?
19:20Nah.
19:28I suppose it can't be easy
19:29being the only girl
19:30working a farm.
19:31Well, one day
19:31my prince will come along
19:33and take me away
19:33from all this.
19:34Except for one thing.
19:36We don't get too many princes
19:37going through hazard.
19:38Hey,
19:40you wouldn't happen
19:41to be one, would you?
19:42Don't know.
19:43I guess I'll have to ask my daddy
19:44if he's been a king
19:45all this time
19:46without telling me.
19:46I'll bet your week's pay
19:47he is.
19:49He could be, princess.
19:51He could be.
19:58But even love's
19:59got to give away to family.
20:01Bo and Luke explained
20:02Jesse's idea
20:03to get him off the hook
20:03with old boss.
20:05You know what kind of schemes
20:06old Luke can come up with.
20:07This ain't 50 cents
20:08on the dollar,
20:09it's 25.
20:10Will you hush up?
20:11Yeah, just hush.
20:12It's more than I get.
20:13Oh, you hush.
20:14I don't care.
20:15Listen, listen.
20:16Ain't you heard
20:17time's a bear
20:18while the whole country
20:19is in a recession?
20:20That means nothing to me.
20:21I ain't moving
20:22these electric typewriters
20:23till I get
20:24what I got coming.
20:25Will you hush?
20:26You want myself on you?
20:27Yeah, I'll cuff you
20:28and stuff you.
20:32Well, if that just
20:33don't take off.
20:34Hey, boss.
20:34Hey, hey,
20:35set your bones
20:36in the flesh.
20:37Roscoe, arrest him.
20:38All right.
20:38All right, freeze, you two.
20:40It's very smart
20:41for you to turn yourself in.
20:43Roscoe, we ain't
20:43turning ourselves in.
20:44Put that thing.
20:45Now, now, listen.
20:46Roscoe, just take it easy.
20:48We're only here
20:48to show you and J.D.
20:50what the truth is.
20:51That's all.
20:51That's right, boss.
20:52There is no way
20:53Bo and Luke planted
20:54that bomb in your room.
20:55That's right.
20:55We were sitting at that
20:56table in the boar's nest
20:57the whole time.
20:58I'm willing to testify.
20:59It'd be a waste of time
21:00to take us to court.
21:02And speaking of time, hog,
21:03I ain't got all day
21:04to graze this pasture.
21:06Are you going to come up
21:06off another $200
21:07to see this truck roll,
21:09or what?
21:09I told you to hush.
21:11$200, huh?
21:12Well, what you got in here
21:13is so precious to hold.
21:15Move in.
21:16Now, don't you all mess
21:17with this truck none,
21:18you hear me?
21:18There's nothing in here
21:19but a load of fertilizer.
21:21Oh, well, let's just see
21:22what kind of fertilizer.
21:23Let's take it.
21:23Now, wait.
21:24Wait a minute.
21:24Wait a minute.
21:25You go home.
21:25Go home.
21:26Go on.
21:26Just move along.
21:27And I'll tell you what I'll do.
21:29I'll drop all chargers
21:31against them boys.
21:31All chargers.
21:33Well, let's just go look
21:35at the decorations.
21:36Yeah, yeah, you do that.
21:37Come on.
21:37Come on.
21:38Come on now.
21:40Just move it.
21:41Move it.
21:42You really did it.
21:42Yeah.
21:44All right, then.
21:44Hey, you.
21:45Come on.
21:46You knew what the deal was
21:47on the telephone.
21:47Let me throw them off.
21:49Oh, oh, oh.
21:54Rascal.
21:55They're too far
21:55as they did it to me again.
21:57Come on, after them.
21:58After them.
21:58All right.
21:59Get them.
22:00Get them.
22:00Go on.
22:01I don't think you're going
22:01to listen to excuses
22:02this time.
22:02I'll adjust you.
22:03We'll see you later.
22:04Get them.
22:04First, they brought
22:04the bull's nest.
22:05Now, my truck.
22:07Get them, Rollscoo.
22:07Go on.
22:08Get them.
22:08Get them.
22:09Get them.
22:09All right.
22:10I saw you.
22:11You didn't fool me.
22:12Come back here.
22:22I'm serious.
22:23This time.
22:24I'm a fucking highly serious.
22:43I'm going to be on round 1-14.
22:46Now, you cut them off
22:47at Jackson Bridge Cut-Off.
22:48Yes, sir.
22:49Good boy.
22:51I love it.
22:52I love it.
22:53I love it.
22:54I love it.
22:54I love it.
22:55I love it.
22:57I love it.
22:57I love it.
22:59I love it.
23:01I love it.
23:12I love it.
23:37Well, there ain't many places no more that the boys can play hide-and-seek with old Rossman.
23:42Even he knows that they ain't dumb enough to try the old silver mine on Pine Ridge Road.
23:47Where are we going, anyway?
23:48We're gonna head up that old silver mine on Pine Ridge Road.
23:57Well, I swear, they're going right to it.
24:08Ah, dang it, the road's blocked! What are we gonna do now?
24:12Now, that there's why I didn't want them to take the Pine Ridge Road.
24:22Shoot!
24:28We got them!
24:29That there's...
24:31Ha ha ha ha!
24:32I look foolishly.
24:33All right.
24:34I got you there.
24:35I got you both of you.
24:37Just get in here.
24:37Just get right into that field.
24:39Now, if you're thinking old Bo and Luke have got themselves a plan to get away from old Rosto and
24:43Pleas...
24:43Well, they ain't.
24:46You know, I bet Boss Hogg set them explosions himself just so he could collect on the insurance.
24:50I don't think so.
24:51Well, why not? He's done it before.
24:53He's too surprised, too scared.
24:55What can I get you guys for breakfast?
24:58I ain't hungry, Cletus.
25:00Nah, I don't want anything either.
25:01Look, Uncle Jesse just called and made me promise to get some nourishment down you.
25:05So what's it gonna be?
25:07Well then, how about a glass of milk?
25:08You can make that a pitcher.
25:10Okay, that's two orders of eggs and sausage, home fries, side of waffles and bacon, and two pitchers of milk.
25:18Now, when old Cletus makes a promise to Uncle Jesse or anybody, he keeps it.
25:22You know, it's hard to believe that him and old Boss are even keen.
25:28Now, just look what's happened.
25:30Some clown's setting off bombs and hazards.
25:33And what's Boss doing?
25:34Making speeches.
25:37Thanks to yours truly, T.D. Holt, you're no longer gonna have to endure the peeing and sorrow of peeing
25:44your annual Hazard County taxes.
25:46No siree.
25:48From now on, I'm gonna make things a lot easier for you by withholding them taxes right out of your
25:53pee chick each and every week.
25:57How do you like that, Roscoe?
25:58Oh, that's good.
25:59That's to get me a big hand, shouldn't it?
26:01Uh, well, if anybody shows up.
26:04You remember last year, there wasn't too many showed up.
26:05No, that's right.
26:06Well, the less to bid them.
26:08How do you figure that?
26:10Divide and conquer.
26:11Oh, that's it.
26:12Oh.
26:13Well, well, well, look who's here.
26:14Who?
26:15J.W. Hickman again.
26:17Me the flash.
26:18Well, what do you want now?
26:20Well, I'm just wondering if you were reconsidering my proposition, J.D.
26:24All things considered that need reconsidering.
26:27Yeah?
26:28Like what?
26:29Well, like them two little accidents that happened to two of your major enterprises.
26:34Shame, J.D.
26:36Now, you see, under my guidance, them accidents never would have happened.
26:40J.W., you can just go suck a lemon.
26:43You know what that means, don't you?
26:46You tell him, boss, it takes one to know one.
26:49You just...
26:49You hush.
26:50And you too.
26:51And you.
26:52Well, you can just get off my back.
26:54I have no intention of retiring.
26:56And if you don't believe me, you can just come out this afternoon at one o'clock
26:59and listen to my state of the county address.
27:02It's all about my plans to have the county for the next, oh, 10, 20, 30 years or more.
27:08Oh, you know all about it, huh?
27:10Mm-hmm.
27:10Well, then you also know that I don't scare you easy, so you can just get out of here.
27:14Yeah, I'd take Rollover with you.
27:16That's Rollo.
27:28Rollo, looks as if we're gonna have to do business with Boss Hogg the hard way.
27:32J.W. Hickman from Claridge County, are you sure?
27:36Yes, sir, Uncle Jesse.
27:37Me and Luke saw him coming out of Boss Hogg's office plain as day.
27:40Heh, that old thief.
27:42Well, he's been trying to take over J.D.'s operation for years.
27:46The only difference between him and J.D. is that J.D.'s a fatter thief.
27:51Heh, heh, heh.
27:52And if I had my druthers, I'd take J.D. Hogg because that Hickman, he could be real mean.
27:58Well, if he's been trying to take over for years, this time he's making a special effort.
28:02He got somebody working for him in Hazard County with a handful of bombs.
28:05Oh, that can't be, Luke.
28:08I mean, I don't know anybody in Hazard County that particularly likes J.D. Hogg.
28:13But I also don't know anybody that wants to blow him up.
28:16Well, maybe we don't know everybody in Hazard County all that well.
28:19Like who?
28:20Like Daisy's new boyfriend, Earl.
28:23We don't know him at all.
28:35Hi.
28:37Daisy.
28:38Hi.
28:38You keep abusing them brakes, and you're gonna need new pads.
28:41Well, I'll tell you something.
28:42You can fix them even if they don't need to be fixed.
28:44Hi, Earl.
28:45Hi.
28:46Now, there's a job for a grown man.
28:49I was on my way to visit Bone Luke in the jailhouse, and I thought you might want to go
28:52with me.
28:53Oh, I sure would, Daisy.
28:54But Cooter's off to Atlanta City for some new parts, and I can't leave this place alone.
28:58Okay.
28:58Will you say hi for me, though, here?
29:01Earl, they're really in trouble this time.
29:03And we all know they didn't do anything wrong.
29:05I know, Daisy.
29:07It has to be some crazy go around bombing things like that, but things will be fine.
29:12You'll see.
29:15You run along, darling.
29:16See the boys.
29:17And tell them I'm sorry I couldn't.
29:19I will.
29:19I'll say hello for you.
29:21Bye.
29:36Hey, Mobile 223, please.
29:39Hello?
29:40Hey there.
29:41This is Earl.
29:45Hey, right on time, boy.
29:48You done good.
29:49Real good.
29:51Trouble A is not good enough.
29:53Boss Hogg's making a speech this afternoon at one o'clock.
29:56I know.
29:58Well, stop him.
30:00Now that kind of work's gonna cost you double the money.
30:03Yeah, well, it's gonna be worth every penny of it, boy.
30:06And, uh, good luck.
30:08And it better be good luck.
30:32Hey, Uncle Jesse.
30:33Hi, Steve.
30:34Hi, boys.
30:35Hey.
30:35Can I bring you something from home or cook you up a little something special?
30:38Oh, no, thank you.
30:39Uh, you didn't bring Earl with you, did you?
30:40No, he didn't bring Earl with you.
30:41He had to stay in work.
30:42But he wanted me to tell you both, hey, he really likes you, boy.
30:45Boy, Uncle Jesse likes you so much.
30:47I hope you like him.
30:48Well, uh, Daisy, we was, uh, uh, the boys here was kinda wondering about Earl.
30:55Oh, yeah?
30:56Wondering what?
30:57Uh, look, we don't want you to take what we're gonna say wrong.
31:01Uh, cause we ain't really even sure of it ourselves yet.
31:04Well, you better be sure before you say anything against Earl.
31:07Well, now, all we know about him is what he's told you.
31:10Yeah, and you gotta admit that them bombs did start blowing up all over Hazard County
31:13as soon as he got here.
31:14And he was right there each time one of them went off.
31:16So were you two.
31:17So was Cooter.
31:17So was everybody.
31:18I don't know if I can forgive you for even thinking like that about Earl.
31:21But, Daisy, we're only trying to help you out.
31:23Wait, no more.
31:24I don't wanna talk about it.
31:25I don't wanna hear one more bad thing about Earl.
31:26I swear I'll never talk to either one of you again, ever!
31:29Feisty, ain't you?
31:29Now, wait a minute, Daisy!
31:32Now, while y'all are worried about that, keep your eyes on that clock.
31:36And this one, too.
31:42Howdy.
31:48Earl?
31:51Earl?
31:58Earl?
31:59Earl, are you up there?
32:02Earl?
32:03Hey, sugar, you up here?
32:06Earl?
32:07Hey, sugar, you up here?
32:11Oh, no.
32:15Y'all reckon that that's Earl?
32:22Earl?
32:31Earl?
32:38I cared for you.
32:40I thought you really cared for me.
32:44But you were just using me all along, weren't you?
32:47Now, just hush up.
32:48This'll all be over at one o'clock, and I'll be on my way.
32:51Bob's away again, huh, Earl?
32:52Well, it's what I do best, ain't it?
32:54Wait a minute.
32:55One o'clock?
32:55What?
32:56That's when Boss Hogg's gonna give a speech down in Hazard Square.
32:59Earl?
33:00No, you can't do that, Earl!
33:02Now, just sit down.
33:03Oh, no!
33:12Ten more minutes.
33:14All right.
33:16Ten minutes to go.
33:18Before the big moment.
33:21My annual state of the county speech.
33:24Now, let me just see here.
33:27Here.
33:29Oh, Bois?
33:31Bois?
33:31Oh, you're getting all ready for your speech?
33:33Yeah.
33:34Yeah, I am.
33:35You know something?
33:35I just can't wait to hear what you're gonna say.
33:38All right.
33:39All right.
33:39How do I look?
33:40You look good.
33:41You look good.
33:41In fact, you remind me of a little white bale of cotton.
33:46Flash and I, we brought you a present.
33:48Well, that's mighty decent of you, Roscoe.
33:50I know.
33:51Only, you shouldn't go spending your hard-earned money on a present for me.
33:55I didn't.
33:56Oh.
33:57What I did was pick you a flower out in front of the courthouse.
34:00Hey.
34:01You do-do.
34:02There's nothing growing out there but purple weed.
34:04Get that away from me.
34:05No, there's ragweed.
34:06No, get that away from me, will you?
34:08I thought it was quite pretty.
34:22You better bless yourself and I don't stop sneezing in the next, next eight minutes.
34:28Ah-choo!
34:30Ah-choo!
34:31Ah-choo!
34:32Ah-choo!
34:34Ah-choo!
34:34Ah-choo!
34:35Ah-choo!
34:36That feels so foolish, Luke.
34:38We should've never done that to Daisy.
34:39You reckon she's ever gonna forgive us?
34:41Well, I suppose if we apologize real hard and promise to do the dishes and the laundry for a week
34:46or two, she'll see a way clear to forgiveness.
34:48You know, you think you and me be old enough by now to know better than accuse somebody without any
34:52proof?
34:53We got all the proof we need.
34:55Come here, take a look, Poe.
34:56Hop in Kuda's window above the garage.
35:00He's got Daisy.
35:01We gotta get out of here.
35:01Cletus is out, dude.
35:02He's alone.
35:03What are you gonna do to fool him to get us out of here?
35:06I'll think of something.
35:07All right.
35:08Uh, Cletus!
35:08Cletus!
35:09Oh, oh, oh!
35:11You got it?
35:12You got it?
35:12You can go.
35:14Good.
35:16Ah-choo!
35:18Boss!
35:18Oh, oh!
35:19You all right?
35:23Oh, boy!
35:25If you all are worrying about the time, it's five minutes to one.
35:29And take it on, buddy.
35:31What's all this ruckus about down here?
35:33Cletus, we got an important phone call to me.
35:34Open the door.
35:35Oh, no, you don't, Lou.
35:37No, no, no.
35:37You've already had your one phone call.
35:39No, siree.
35:40You're just trying to get me open this door so you can escape.
35:42Well, I just didn't fall off the turnip truck.
35:44We just, we don't want to escape.
35:45We just want to get out there so we can take it.
35:47I know, I know.
35:47I remember the time you said you wanted to confess.
35:50And when Enos opened the door, you took his gun and you stuck him on a wall in a chair.
35:54Well, that's not going to work with me.
35:55Nothing's going to work with me.
35:56Okay, Cletus, you're too smart for us, all right?
35:57But listen up.
35:58That guy Earl's got Daisy in a room above Cooter's garage.
36:01Now, if you don't believe us, you can look for yourself.
36:03He's got a gun on him.
36:04A gun?
36:05A gun.
36:05On Daisy?
36:06On Daisy.
36:06You guys should be ashamed of yourself saying something like that just so I'd open this door.
36:10Cletus, we ain't lying to you now, dang it!
36:12We swear to you on Uncle Jesse's life we ain't.
36:15Uncle Jesse's life?
36:18Buzzer's on a bus, though.
36:20Must be true.
36:21Come on, hurry up.
36:24Come on, we'll give you a hand up.
36:25Where?
36:25Look for yourself.
36:26On top of the garage?
36:29Well, he is there, son of a...
36:31Hey, fellas!
36:34Fellas!
36:38All right, everybody, get out of the way of the commissioner.
36:40Good, too.
36:40I just love this sort of thing, don't you?
36:42Ooh!
36:43Ooh, that's a...
36:44Let me see here.
36:44Big hand is...
36:46Well, it's two minutes to walk.
36:50Well, I'll be.
36:51Looks like your cousin's got themselves out of jail and they're coming and calling on us.
37:01Daisy, get away from that winter.
37:02I don't want to hurt you.
37:03There's a bomb there!
37:04Don't let him make a speech!
37:06There's a bomb!
37:06Come on, let's go.
37:07I'll try to stop, boss.
37:08All right.
37:09Come on.
37:10I'll be here, Mike.
37:11Here you go.
37:12Come on, get in.
37:13You drive.
37:18Move it.
37:27Our friends and fellow citizens!
37:30Come on, get the comms!
37:34There's a bomb!
37:35Hey!
37:36Get in!
37:38Oh!
37:39Oh, God!
37:40Hey!
37:40Where is this, sir?
37:45OK.
37:46Carol took her in Coutard's car.
37:47Let's go.
37:48Come on, Carol!
37:49Go East, I'm in it!
37:50Come on.
37:57What's going on here? That boy saved my life.
38:00Now let's go see what's going on.
38:31Now, Roscoe, watch it! Watch it! Watch my feet!
38:35The way you're driving, I'd rather take my chances with another ball.
38:41Well, you want me to catch them, don't you?
38:43Yeah, but I'm going to be alive when we get there.
39:02You're right up at this. He's been Earl all along. He's got Daisy with him.
39:05We're going to have to try and set up a roadblock on Spruce Tree Lane.
39:09Spruce Tree Lane, I got you. You watch out for Daisy.
39:25Well, come on, then, boys. It's gaining on us. Now step on it.
39:31Oh, man.
39:34Cut right through here.
39:35That's not a road. That's a deer crossing, Earl.
39:38So make like a deer.
39:48Let's go.
39:54Let's go!
39:59We're right next to father.
40:06I don't know.
40:16Come on, Daisy, step on.
40:18I am, Earl.
40:22It's Uncle Jesse.
40:25Just gear around him, Daisy.
40:31Watch it!
40:33Quick goods are on block and nobody stops.
40:43I don't think you're trying too hard to lose him, girl.
40:45Earl, if you don't like the way I drive, you should shoot me.
40:48Well, that ain't a bad idea.
40:54Hello, this is Earl Beckett.
40:57Y'all got your ears on out there?
40:59You listen and you listen hard.
41:02I want y'all to stop your beehive.
41:05Stop them or I swear by all that's mighty.
41:08This little hazard girl's gonna take a bullet.
41:13You got five seconds.
41:16One.
41:19Two.
41:20We ain't taking no chance. It's four.
41:23Three.
41:23Right.
41:26Four.
41:27We're stopping. We're stopping.
41:29Now, listen.
41:31Don't you harm a hair on that girl's head.
41:33You hear me?
41:34All right, let's stop, everybody.
41:43See that, sugar?
41:44You were something to me after all.
41:46Oh, yeah?
41:59I don't know about y'all, but if a pretty girl with a gun was marching me off to the
42:03woods,
42:04I'd go.
42:05He almost killed all my friends and some of my enemies, too.
42:08Daisy, you all right?
42:09Is he all right?
42:10Yeah.
42:11There he is!
42:11There he is!
42:12He's come from North Coast!
42:13So you're the one, huh?
42:14Trying to blow up everything I got, huh?
42:16Well, you can just go back and get...
42:18No, you ain't gonna tell Hickman nothing, but you're gonna be in the jail.
42:21Come on, throw them on there.
42:25Well, that old sorry clown got his comeuppance, and I'm glad.
42:29You know, people are awful protective about Daisy.
42:33Now, about old Hickman and Rolo.
42:36Sorry Earl, to save his own hide, turned state's evidence against Boss Hickman for attempted assault.
42:41Yes, those ruffians.
42:42All right.
42:43Take care.
42:45And old Roscoe finally let Cleetus out.
42:47He spends more time in jail than Bo and Luke.
42:50Come on.
42:52Get out!
42:53Go on!
42:53But the week wasn't a complete loss.
42:55Because that Friday, Boss of Speedwrap snagged another big fish.
42:59For the second time.
43:04To Mama crying with her head in her hand
43:06Just a sad case, so brokenhearted
43:10She say, Mama, gotta go, gotta get out of here
43:13Gotta get out of town, tired of hanging around
43:15I gotta Rolo between the ditches
43:20Just an ordinary story about the way things go
43:23Round and around, nobody knows
43:25But the highway goes on forever
43:29That old highway goes on forever
43:37But she never would've done it if she hadn't got drunk
43:40If she hadn't started running with a traveling man
43:42If she hadn't started taking those crazy chances
43:47She say, daughter, let me tell you about the traveling kind
43:50Everywhere is going such a very short time
43:52He'll be long gone before you know it
43:56He'll be long gone before you know it
44:04She say, never have I learned it when it felt so good
44:07Never have I knew it when I knew I could
44:09Never have I done it when it looked so right
44:11Leave a little Danny in a broad daylight
44:27This town doesn't stop where anything goes
44:30Alligator bait and the bars don't close
44:32We'll bang down in Luliana
44:37Did you ever see a Cajun when he really got mad
44:40When he really got trouble like a daughter
44:41An old man who gets real hot
44:43Down in Luliana
44:47Well, a stranger better move it or he's gonna get killed
44:50He's gonna have to get it or a shotgun
44:51Well, it ain't no time for laying speech
44:55There ain't no time for laying speech
45:03She say, never have I learned it when it felt so good
45:06Never have I knew it when I knew I could
45:09Never have I done it when it looked so right
45:11Leaving Luliana in a broad daylight
45:15She say, never have I known it when it felt so good
45:18Never have I knew it when I knew I could
45:20Never have I done it when it looked so right
45:22Leaving Luliana in a broad daylight
45:26Just an ordinary story about the way things go
45:29Round and around, nobody knows
45:31But the highway goes on forever
45:34That old highway goes on forever
45:51It sure was nice you guys stopped by in Hazard again
45:54No offense, but we were just passing through
45:56Yeah, and he stopped us again
45:58A little hush
45:59Oh, well, Daisy, they were doing 36 in a 35 mile an hour zone
46:03And now that is the law, you know
46:05And look here, boys
46:07I'm gonna turn up this year speeding ticket of yours again
46:11On account of you boys, your song's so nice
46:14Again
46:16Is there any safe way we can get through Hazard County?
46:18Not as long as you sing that good, honey
46:22You know, I bet if old Hank Williams drove through Hazard
46:25They'd never let him go
46:26Yeah
46:26Whooo Yeah, yeah
46:28Yeah
46:31Yeah
46:31Yeah
46:31What am I doing?
46:47I heard it
46:48Give me something
46:49You can take it
46:49Hey
46:50Let's go
46:50Take care
46:50You know
46:51Hi
46:52Y-
46:52Here
46:55I can't
47:11Good job, you too.
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