- 5 weeks ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Hazard County has its big heist.
00:06Don't shoot!
00:07Stick him up and don't move!
00:10Get him up, boss.
00:11I already did.
00:12That's the Duke boys!
00:15Where's your car and where's the money?
00:17Wait! Wait!
00:18Come, come, come, come!
00:20Is it all right with you if you spend tonight?
00:23Oh, well, shoot.
00:24We all hang around for the big mix-up.
00:30Hear?
00:36Just a good old boy
00:38Never meaning no harm
00:41Beats all you never saw
00:45Been in trouble with the law
00:47Since the day they was born
00:49Straightening the curves
00:52Flat in the hills
00:55Someday the mountain might get them
01:00But the law never will
01:02Making their way
01:06The only way they know how
01:09That's just a little bit more
01:13Than the law will allow
01:15Just a good old boy
01:18Wouldn't change if they could
01:22Fighting the system like a true
01:27Modern-day Robin Hood
01:28Yee-haw!
01:30I'll tell you one thing
01:53For General Lee to be eating up the road
01:55This early in the morning
01:56Something sure got Bo and Luke
01:59All head up
02:00I figure it's got something
02:01To do with women
02:02Or hunting
02:04Or maybe weeds
02:07Oh, I can't believe it
02:16I can't believe my new boots
02:18Finally came in at the post office
02:19Well, this is Hazard County
02:22And even I'm gonna miss
02:24Sometime
02:25I still think you're crazy
02:28Buying mail-order boots
02:30Well, you can't beat the price
02:32For genuine leather
02:33Hey, you felt that swatch
02:34They sent me
02:35Was that real or not?
02:36So's my wallet
02:37That doesn't mean
02:38It's gonna fit my feet
02:39On Monday, Wednesday, and Friday
02:41Hazard County Commissioner
02:43Boss Jefferson Davis Hogg
02:45Can be found down at the courthouse
02:46Corrupting the county
02:47Like now
02:48Where he's counting out
02:50Illegal moonshine money
02:51He's splitting even
02:52With Sheriff Roscoe Coldrain
02:54Oh, for me
02:56One for the sheriff
02:58Five for me
03:03One for the sheriff
03:07That's Boss Hogg
03:09Everything 50-50
03:11Right down the middle
03:12Hot
03:39Choo-choo.
04:09Ennis, you got your ears on?
04:12I'm here, Sheriff.
04:13Listen, get the tow truck down here at the county courthouse.
04:16I got another $15 impound for you.
04:19What do you think?
04:23Go for it.
04:39Well, I'll see you in about five minutes.
04:46I'll be wearing my, uh, bright, shiny new boots.
04:51I'm gonna go catch a cup of coffee.
05:09Don't shoot! Don't shoot!
05:27If it's money you're after, forget it.
05:31I never keep any money in my office.
05:33I just, uh, sent a few pennies for my poor mama's operation.
05:39And there's the truth.
05:40I swear it on my mama's grave.
05:43You fell off that sack.
05:46Looky here, boy.
05:47This lick of money was hard to come by.
05:50You feel it?
05:50Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
05:52Come on.
05:54Faster.
05:56Faster.
05:56Faster.
05:56Now you turn around and count to a hundred.
06:09One, two, three, four.
06:10Slow!
06:11One, two, three, four, five, ten.
06:16Old boss can't even count to a hundred without cheating.
06:19One hundred!
06:26Hey, stop, you thief!
06:30I'll finish crafting, you thief!
06:32Come back with my money!
06:34You, you...
06:35Come back here!
06:36Stop!
06:37Stop, stop, you thief!
06:38Stop!
06:39Come back with my money!
06:40I'll lose you all along, Bo Duke!
06:44I'd take it real kindly if you'd just keep on driving.
06:46Well, I'd take it real kindly if you'd look upon me kindly.
06:56Luke, why didn't you stop for me?
07:13Pass the dude with the gun.
07:15What?
07:18Hey, uh, you're nice and comfortable back there.
07:21You just keep on driving.
07:24Yeah.
07:25Right.
07:26Driving.
07:26This is J.D. Hall calling Sheriff Roscoe Coltrane.
07:38Come in.
07:41Roscoe?
07:42Where in town nation are you?
07:43Come in!
07:47Roscoe!
07:50Here, I'm Roscoe here, boss.
07:52Hey, boss, that's a great idea of yours putting that white tape on those parking sides.
07:57We already made $30 this morning.
07:58Still early yet.
07:59Over.
08:00Roscoe, I don't care diddly about $30.
08:04I've just been robbed of $30,000 by Bo Duke.
08:08Over.
08:10Bo Duke?
08:11Are you sure, boss?
08:12Over.
08:12Well, he just escaped in an orange store car with a big black and white suit of one marked
08:21on the door, and Luke Duke was driving.
08:24Is that good enough for you?
08:25Over.
08:27That's the Duke boys.
08:29We got them.
08:30We got them.
08:31Over.
08:32We got nothing but a jackass for a shelf.
08:36Now, you listen.
08:37I knew this and good.
08:39They was headed south on Interstate 104.
08:41That's where you'll get them.
08:43And where you'll get my money, my $30,000.
08:46And if that's no interest to you, just remember, part of that money is yours.
08:53Oh, it's that money.
08:55This is Sheriff Roscoe, calling all cars, calling all cars.
09:04Over.
09:05All cars?
09:06There ain't no other cars besides you and me, Sheriff.
09:09Over.
09:11Enos, listen.
09:12The Duke boys have just robbed Boss Hogg all his money, and they're headed out of town.
09:17Now, I'm going to go south, and you take the north road in case they get sneaky and head back.
09:21I'm gone.
09:25Now, I'm truly sorry about this, fellas, but I'm going to have to borrow your car for just a little bit.
09:37Both of you get out.
09:38Real slow.
09:39No, no, no, that way.
09:41Real slow.
09:45What kind of thief are you, anyways?
09:47Not having your own getaway car.
09:48Now, I don't take kindly to being called a thief.
09:51I'm sorry?
09:51I've never done nothing like this before.
09:54I probably never will again.
09:56Now, listen.
09:57You boys don't worry none about your car.
09:59I won't do it no harm.
10:00In fact, I'll fill it up with gas before I leave it.
10:02I can't do much more than that, can I?
10:04Well, you can get it washed.
10:07You got it.
10:07That road's going to take him right back to town.
10:20Well, you want to hobble after him in your new mail-order boots and tell him that?
10:23I don't know what's going to say in the mail-order kit.
10:41Fuck you!
10:47Oh, my God.
11:17Oh, my God.
11:47Oh, my God.
12:01Just move it right there.
12:04Just move it.
12:05Hold it.
12:06Freeze!
12:07Just freeze right there because you're covered, I've got you.
12:09Put that thing away, Roscoe. It might go off.
12:12All right. Where's your car and where's the money?
12:34Can I get your refill on that beer?
12:36What?
12:37You want a refill?
12:39Oh, no, no. I've had my limit. Thank you, ma'am.
12:42I'm Daisy.
12:44Oh, Neil Bishop. Pleased to meet you.
12:47Pleased to meet you.
13:07Change your mind about that beer?
13:19Change your mind about that beer?
13:20Now, if we'd have stole boss's money, why would we be walking instead of driving our car?
13:32I haven't figured that out yet, but that's just typical of you to throw me off the track. Now, just get in the car. Nice and slow. Now, just...
13:45Well, not that slow. Just get in fast. Get in quick. Hurry up.
13:51Quick! Quick! Quick!
13:54Come back here.
13:56Don't make me use this gun. Freeze!
14:00Freeze!
14:01Wait a minute. Let's go this way. I know a shortcut.
14:14This is a shortcut, right?
14:15Yeah, right.
14:16Well, why is it all shortcuts are uphill?
14:17Well, this side isn't.
14:18Okay. Let's go down in the creek and we can hide under the bridge.
14:20All right.
14:21Woo!
14:22Does that water feel good on my foot? Come on.
14:27Yeah.
14:29That's right.
14:30Come on.
14:32All right.
14:34Let's go down in the creek and we can hide under the bridge.
14:35All right.
14:41Whoo!
14:43Does that water feel good on my foot?
14:44Come on.
14:45I'm on.
14:48Well, I guess I got to hand it to you this time, cousin.
14:56You seem to know all the shortcuts.
14:58Not all of them.
15:01I know one a little shorter.
15:03You know, this is the first time
15:05that I ever fished this creek and ever caught anything.
15:09Now, ain't that some kind of luck?
15:12If it had been a month sooner,
15:13fishing would have been out of season.
15:15Old Roscoe would have had to throw them back.
15:18I don't know if it had been out of season.
15:25You okay, fella?
15:26You keep looking at that door
15:28like a husband behind an alimony
15:29with a wife who's a crack shot.
15:32Oh, no, not me. I've never married.
15:35Me either.
15:48Hey, Daisy.
15:50How you doing?
15:51Howdy.
15:51Hey there, Enos.
15:53Business or pleasure?
15:54Well, it's business, Daisy,
15:55and it ain't no pleasure either.
15:57I'm looking for Bo and Luke.
15:59I know they're here
16:00because the General Lee's parked right out front
16:02next to you to pick up a truck.
16:03Bo and Luke ain't here.
16:05I don't know what their car's doing out front.
16:07What's wrong?
16:07Well, it seems they stole a whole lot of money
16:10from Boss Hogg.
16:11Bo and Luke wouldn't steal anything,
16:12and you know it.
16:14Well, it's armed robbery, Daisy.
16:16Armed robbery?
16:18Yeah.
16:19Boss Hogg recognized Bo,
16:21and they got away in the General Lee.
16:23I'm sorry, Daisy.
16:25I got a report in
16:26that I found the General Lee.
16:27Willis, be careful with that gun.
16:34Okay, I will.
16:35Stick them up and don't move.
17:01Will you go away, little boy?
17:03Quit messing with me.
17:04I got to get some gas in this car here.
17:06I'll shoot if you don't put up your hands.
17:09Attaboy, partner.
17:10Keep them covered.
17:12You got that money
17:13hidden in a safe place?
17:14Yeah, I put it where
17:15nobody will find it.
17:18Don't turn around, Roscoe.
17:19No, no.
17:20He means it.
17:21You mean to tell me
17:22that little brat's got our pistol?
17:24Now, don't rile him, Roscoe.
17:25Now, he means business.
17:27That's just like you Duke boys,
17:29leading a little boy
17:30into a life of crime.
17:31Does your Uncle Jesse
17:32know you're doing this?
17:33He ain't a little boy, Roscoe.
17:35Ain't.
17:36No.
17:37He's a midget.
17:39Midget?
17:40Man, boy, is he ever mean.
17:42Mean.
17:43Mean.
17:45Mean.
17:45We meet you at the hideout
17:47for the split.
17:48Three ways.
17:48Right.
17:49Willis, now, I warned you
17:57about squirting customers
17:58with that water pistol.
18:00Did it hit you, Sheriff?
18:01What?
18:02Water.
18:03Pistol.
18:04You.
18:05You.
18:05You.
18:05You.
18:06You.
18:06You.
18:06You.
18:07You.
18:07You.
18:07You.
18:07You.
18:07You.
18:07You.
18:08You.
18:08You.
18:08You.
18:09You.
18:09You.
18:10You heard the saying,
18:11never trust anyone over 30.
18:13Well, in Hazard,
18:14that age starts around seven.
18:16We've got to get back to Jesse
18:27and figure something out.
18:30We can pick up Daisy's car
18:31at the boar's nest.
18:32Yeah.
18:33All right.
18:46We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:48We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:49We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:50We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:51We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:52We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:53We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:54We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:55We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:56We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:57We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:58We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
18:59We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
19:00We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
19:01We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
19:02We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
19:03We've got to get back to Jesse's car.
19:04Enos told me what you did.
19:18Now, Daisy, we didn't steal boss's money.
19:20It was somebody else.
19:22And if that's not bad enough, the same guy threw us out of General Lee.
19:25And he took that, too.
19:26General Lee?
19:27But it was here just a little while ago.
19:29Enos just had it tied off.
19:31Well, whoever the guy is, he's got nerve.
19:33What'd he look like?
19:35We don't know.
19:36He's wearing a mask.
19:37Boy, that's going to be hard to tell.
19:39There's been scads of people in and out here.
19:41It's payday.
19:42Well, what we got to do now is get to Jesse and talk this out.
19:46Could you give me the keys to your car?
19:48I didn't bring the car.
19:49I took the pickup to get some feed and fertilizer.
19:51It's out front.
19:52All right.
19:52Now, call Jesse and have him meet us at the old still site.
19:55Which one?
19:56Well, number two is closest.
20:00What happened to your foot?
20:01Oh, it must have fell asleep while I was sitting down on that thing there.
20:04Well, as long as you keep wearing them boots, I'd let sleeping dogs lie.
20:07Well, it's okay.
20:08Well, it's okay.
20:09Let's go.
20:09Let's go.
20:10Let's go.
20:10Let's go.
20:41Oh, uh, well, to tell you the truth, I ain't got a dime to my name, except for beer money.
20:50I ain't even got a place to stay the night.
20:54Down on your luck, huh?
20:56Uh, yeah.
20:58You want to dance?
21:02Okay.
21:02Uh, you wouldn't happen to know if anybody would let me conk out in their barn overnight.
21:12I'd be glad to work off my keep.
21:14Well, we got a barn.
21:17I got an important phone call to make, and then you can drive us out, okay?
21:20Oh, I'm afraid the sheriff impounded my car.
21:24I got 15 bucks that says it's out.
21:27Well, all right.
21:29Oh, oh, but I'll make it up to you.
21:31I'm expecting some money real soon, man.
21:33Meanwhile, you still need that place to stay tonight, don't you?
21:36Oh.
21:37It's getting kind of hard to figure who's trying to snag who, ain't it?
21:42Uh, he ain't here.
22:05Yeah.
22:07Maybe Daisy told Jesse the wrong still.
22:10She told me right.
22:12Here I'll be.
22:13Well, what's the gun for, Jesse?
22:15You ain't making moonshine up here, are you?
22:17Being around to steal without a shotgun's like, uh, being in church without your shirt on.
22:22It don't feel right.
22:24Now, what's this Daisy tells me about you two stealing some money and being on the run?
22:29Uncle Jesse, we...
22:30We didn't steal no money.
22:32If you didn't steal the money, did they plant it on you?
22:36No, Uncle Jesse, we ain't even seen it.
22:37That's what I told you.
22:39Did Roscoe get it?
22:40Roscoe ain't seen it either.
22:42Well, then they got no case.
22:46The money's the evidence, you know.
22:48And without proof, Roscoe and Hog wouldn't dare go against you.
22:53Well, Jesse, if so happens, we got all the proof we need.
22:57You amateurs, you let them follow you right in here.
23:02We didn't follow them, you old coot.
23:05We followed you.
23:07Well, they still ain't got no hard evidence against us.
23:09Yo, we do, son.
23:11We do.
23:11We do.
23:12What evidence?
23:13Y'all ain't even got the money you say we took.
23:16We don't need to.
23:17Jesse, you mightn't trust me or Roscoe here.
23:21But wouldn't you trust Enos?
23:23Well, I'd trust Enos.
23:25All right.
23:25Enos!
23:26Enos!
23:26Come on out here.
23:27There he is.
23:29Come on now.
23:30Go ahead.
23:31Jesse, I'm mighty sorry, Bo.
23:32And Luke, I'm mighty sorry about that.
23:34All right, just show him, Enos.
23:35Show him.
23:36Well, I found this money in the backseat of the General Lee when I got it back to the
23:40in-pound yard.
23:41You call that little dab of money evidence?
23:44Well, that's not real evidence.
23:46Go, show him, Enos.
23:47Show him.
23:47Here.
23:53Yeah, there y'all.
23:55What's that?
23:56That's Enos.
23:57Enos.
23:58Oh, that is the mask that the witness saw on the robber that stole all that money from
24:02Boss Hogg.
24:03And that robber was you, Bo Duke.
24:06You stole my $30,000, and I want it back.
24:09Now, where is it?
24:12Oh, not talking, huh?
24:16Well, you rot in jail till you do.
24:19Now, I'll tell y'all, that's something even I never figured on.
24:23And I've been following this real close.
24:32All right.
24:33Come on, then.
24:33Boys, I'll be down to see you as soon as I finish my chores.
24:39Pickup truck's up on the old road, Uncle Jesse.
24:43Come on.
24:43That was Bo and Luke.
24:58They're under arrest.
25:00Sure looks like it.
25:01Yeah, if they didn't do anything wrong.
25:03Uncle Jesse, I just saw the sheriff taking in Bo and Luke.
25:24I know I was there when they was took.
25:26I'm getting my bow and arrow.
25:28Now, just be calm.
25:30It's going to be all right.
25:31Everything's under control.
25:33You sure?
25:34Well, of course I'm sure.
25:35Don't I always...
25:37Who's that?
25:38Oh, this here is Neil Bishop.
25:44Uh, he needs a place to stay the night.
25:46I told him he could sleep in the barn.
25:48Sort of down on his luck.
25:50Howdy.
25:51Howdy.
25:51You, uh, drawer your pocket.
25:54Oh, yeah.
25:55Well, I ripped it on some barbed wire.
25:57You a farmer?
25:58Yeah, a chicken farm over in Clarence County.
26:00Oh, well, good.
26:02Is it all right with you if he spends the night?
26:04Well, of course.
26:05But friends of ours don't sleep in the barn.
26:07You can have the boys' room.
26:10No sleepwalking.
26:14Well, I guess I better get this pickup unloaded
26:17and get on into the jailhouse.
26:19Oh, well, I'd be right honored if you let me do that for you, sir.
26:22It's the least I can do for all the hospitality.
26:25Besides, this way you can be going right now to the jailhouse.
26:29Neil's right.
26:29Why don't you take my car?
26:31Good idea.
26:31Uh, put this away for me, will you?
26:46Hungry?
26:47Oh, a little.
26:48Well, but, uh, why don't I unload this truck first?
26:50Oh, no.
26:51You don't look like you've eaten in a month.
26:52Now, what's it gonna be?
26:54Scrambled eggs or an omelet?
26:55Oh, I...
26:56Well, if you say omelet, it's gonna try out scrambled anyway.
27:00Oh.
27:02My, oh, my.
27:03Now, that money's been sitting on top of that fertilizer so long
27:06that you'd figure it'd start to grow by now, wouldn't you?
27:09Hey, Roscoe!
27:12Oh, good.
27:13Roscoe.
27:13What?
27:14I think I'm losing my mind.
27:15You are?
27:16Yeah, there's a big hole in me where I lost my liquor money.
27:20Why haven't you got them Duke boys to tell you where they hid it?
27:23Well, boss, now, see, that's a lot easier said than done.
27:26You know, legally, they have a right to remain silent.
27:29Oh, dear Roscoe!
27:29You know what?
27:30There are ways to make people talk.
27:34Torture?
27:35You mean torture?
27:36Like in pain?
27:37That's it.
27:38Well, I don't know much about torture or pain.
27:41You don't?
27:42No.
27:43I do?
27:43You do.
27:44I learned all about pain being married to your fat sister.
27:47Oh.
27:48Funny.
27:48I thought it'd run in the family.
27:50Well, maybe I could stomp on just a little, but you don't know, I'll hit back.
27:55Well, Jesse's a fair country back porch lawyer,
27:57so he had the boys tell him everything all over again,
28:01looking to find something to prove their innocence.
28:04Now, this fella that jumped into the car with you with a ski mask on,
28:08was there anything different about him?
28:12Oh, he was real polite.
28:14Well, as crooks go.
28:15Polite?
28:17Yeah, a ski mask and a torn army jacket and a red plaid shirt.
28:21Oh, hold it.
28:23A torn army jacket?
28:24Yeah.
28:24I just met a polite country boy with a torn army jacket out to the farm with Daisy.
28:33With Daisy?
28:34Jesse, you think this could be...
28:35I think enough to be scared.
28:37Jesse, this guy had a gun.
28:39I gotta get back to the farm.
28:40Oh, Luke, we gotta get out of here and fast.
28:42Huh?
28:42Jesse.
28:43Enos!
28:43The deputy's straight.
28:45Come on down, buddy.
28:46We gotta talk to you a minute.
28:47Now, look, if it's about lunch, it's still that cream-chip beef stuff
28:51because the sheriff got a good buy on the whole truckload last month.
28:55It ain't that, Enos.
28:56It's just that...
28:58Well...
28:59Well, this ain't easy to say.
29:01Enos?
29:03Luke and me here decided...
29:05We decided to confess.
29:06Confess.
29:07Confess.
29:20All right.
29:21All right.
29:22Here's the typewriter.
29:24Here's the paper.
29:27Why do y'all start typing and confessing?
29:29Heck, Enos, I can't type.
29:32Say, what about you, Luke?
29:33Me neither.
29:35Well, how about you, Enos?
29:36Well, yeah, I'll type for a little bit.
29:39All right.
29:40All right.
29:41Y'all stay your distance now.
29:43While I get this down on paper...
29:45Okay.
29:45I ain't too good, Bill.
29:48Here you go.
29:49Well, thank you, Luke.
29:50Thank you, Bill.
29:51Sure thing, Enos.
29:53I don't do any more than about five words a minute, not counting errors.
29:58That's all right.
29:59We'll confess real slow.
30:01Y'all gotta help me with the spelling now.
30:04Sure thing.
30:05What's wrong?
30:13I hope it ain't my cooking.
30:14Oh, no, no, no.
30:16It's just something I made my mind up about, and I gotta do it fast before I change my mind.
30:22Oh, wait a minute.
30:24You finish up what's on that plate first.
30:26We don't waste food around here.
30:28Now, I'm not gonna fuss over you.
30:30I got work to do.
30:42Real sorry about this, Enos.
30:45You would really mean that, buddy.
30:46Well, let's go.
30:50Oh, we sure didn't miss you, General.
31:13You all done?
31:31Daisy, that was great.
31:32You cook real country.
31:33Thanks.
31:34Well, I better go unload that pickup truck like I promised your uncle.
31:41See you.
31:42Take a minute.
31:50Bye-bye.
31:50Bye-bye.
31:51Bye-bye.
31:56Thanks.
31:57Bye-bye.
32:08Looking for this, sweet talker?
32:24I'm sorry. Just hold it.
32:26See you.
32:27I got to thinking about it.
32:42Well, maybe that fa...
32:44Listen, I'm real sorry about all this.
32:46Maybe we ought to go in the house, talk it over.
32:47I was thinking right.
32:49No, real slow.
32:50Just don't get nervous, son.
32:51I'm not nervous. Just real slow, okay?
32:54Now, if that ain't a typical Duke situation,
32:59going to the rescue and getting caught in the same trap,
33:02y'all stick around.
33:07That was you that stole Boss Hogg's money, wasn't it, son?
33:11Afraid so, sir.
33:12Listen, sweet talk.
33:14Bo and Luke are cooling their heels in jail where you should be.
33:17Well, I never meant no harm to come to them or anybody.
33:20Matter of fact, I was just taking back the money when you stopped me.
33:24Sweet talk.
33:33Enos?
33:35Enos?
33:42Enos, you got your ears on? Come on.
33:47Enos, are you out there when you should be in here?
33:50Come on.
33:54I swear, Enos, if I catch you,
33:56I'm going to tie you up and hang you on the wall like a side of beef.
34:02Over.
34:02Shoot.
34:03Shoot.
34:22Gee,
34:25Let's go.
34:37Yes?
34:41You think in a police station you'd find at least one cop
34:45hanging around?
34:55All right, now, both of you just sit still.
35:22All right, hold it.
35:23Now, come on, into the room.
35:24Come on, easy.
35:25Easy, just take it real easy, boys.
35:27All right, I told you you had a gun.
35:29It ain't even his gun, it's ours.
35:32And he's practicing for the Liars' Olympics.
35:35Tell him, son.
35:36But it's the truth.
35:39Look, dude, ain't none of us buying anything you got to say.
35:42If you ain't no thief, what do you call taking Boss Hogg's money?
35:46Justice.
35:47The man cheated me.
35:49He sold me a used tractor and ten chicken egg incubators not worth a damn.
35:53The tractor couldn't pull a mule cart,
35:55and the incubators cooked every fresh-laid egg hard-boiled.
35:58I didn't expect that much money, but I didn't have time to count out what was due me either.
36:03You tell a good yarn.
36:07But you're still holding that gun.
36:08Now you got it.
36:16And me and the money.
36:18You can turn it in.
36:22Satisfied?
36:23Well, it looks like we got a situation here of a man telling the truth.
36:35Oh, look, I'll take what's coming to me.
36:37I'm the one who stole Boss's liquor money.
36:40Liquor money?
36:41Are you sure?
36:42Well, that's what the man called it when I took it.
36:45Moonshine money.
36:47What are you thinking, Luke?
36:48I'm thinking we could really have some fun if you call in old Harvey Essex on this one.
36:54Harvey Essex?
36:55Since when did we have anything to do with revenues?
36:59Yeah.
37:06Well, it must be Friday, because there's Boss.
37:09Back at the courthouse, skimming off a little corruption.
37:12Hey, Boss.
37:13Oh, oh, it's you.
37:18It's you.
37:20You're so new.
37:21Boss, have you seen Enos?
37:25Roscoe, how do you expect to keep track of your criminals if you can't keep track of your deputy?
37:32Oh, Boss, you don't have to worry about Enos.
37:34You can bet whatever he's doing, he's doing in the line of duty.
37:43Let's go.
38:01keep roscoe busy stay close on the cv
38:15roscoe
38:18now
38:31on
38:38on
38:40on
38:43on
38:46on
38:49on
38:52on
38:55on
39:02on
39:06on
39:09on
39:16on
39:23on
39:27on
39:30on
39:35on
39:37on
39:38on
39:39enos this is sheriff roscoe you got your ears on come on
39:45enos are you out there come on
39:52enos will you get your butt over here i need you come on come on
40:02on
40:05on
40:09on
40:13on
40:15on
40:16on
40:17on
40:20on
40:21on
40:22on
40:23on
40:34on
40:35on
40:36on
40:37on
40:38on
40:40You ready?
41:00Ready.
41:01Hit it.
41:02Yep.
41:10Good Lord, you're going to rob me again.
41:13Get him up, boss.
41:14Do it now.
41:17Remember, Bo, I already gave.
41:20Who are you calling Bo?
41:26Hey, Harp.
41:27How you been?
41:28Hey, Luke.
41:29Jesse said to meet you here.
41:30Something important, he said.
41:31What can I do for you?
41:33Harp, are you interested in somebody with liquor money they ain't declared to the government?
41:38Who's that?
41:40You'll see.
41:41Come on.
41:51They're driving better than you.
41:55Whoa!
41:57Good Lord.
42:10How do they do that?
42:14I could do that if I didn't want to scuff my hubcaps.
42:20Now, don't you wish they had a ride like that in Disneyland?
42:22Well, damn.
42:25I ain't never seen them do that.
42:28Don't make no difference.
42:31Hit you.
42:36You're really going to rob me again, ain't you?
42:40Don't shoot.
42:41Don't shoot.
42:42What in the world did I ever do to harm you?
42:45Let me rephrase that, Bo.
42:48I swear I'm going to have to shoot you if you don't quit calling me Bo.
42:52Whatever you say, I'll never call you Bo again.
42:55Now, put that money in that sack on top of the rest of your money.
43:01Fast.
43:03Right.
43:04Right, Bo.
43:05I didn't say Bo.
43:07I didn't say Bo.
43:08I said...
43:09No.
43:10Mm-hmm.
43:11How long's it going to take before I see that liquor money, Luke?
43:16Oh, any time now, Harv.
43:19God willing.
43:29You ought to park there in the first place.
43:33I'll give him a 603.
43:36Probably a drunk parker.
43:41Here you are.
43:46That's the last money I've got in the whole wide world.
43:51Good.
43:54You take it.
44:01Sweet talker, this bandit won.
44:03Ready when you are.
44:04Got you, bandit.
44:07Sweet talker out.
44:08Now, boss, I want you to count to 100 before you make a move outside.
44:12Just like before.
44:15Nice and slow.
44:17That's right.
44:18Now you turn around and start counting.
44:21One.
44:23One.
44:25Two.
44:26Three.
44:28Four.
44:29Five.
44:31Ten.
44:33Fifteen.
44:34Twenty.
44:35Twenty-five.
44:36Thirty.
44:37Thirty-five.
44:37Forty.
44:37Fifty.
44:38Fifty.
44:38Fifty.
44:38Fifty.
44:38Fifty.
44:38Fifty.
44:39Fifty.
44:39Fifty.
44:39Fifty.
44:39Fifty.
44:40Fifty.
44:42Something better show fast, Luke.
44:43You're in big trouble.
44:44Uncle Sam don't like being part of no setup.
44:46Now, Harv, just...
44:47Okay.
44:48Come on over here.
44:49You keep your eye on that door.
44:52Your liquor money will be right out.
45:10Help!
45:11I've been robbed again!
45:12I've been robbed again!
45:13Help!
45:14Help!
45:15Help!
45:16Help!
45:16Stop!
45:17Stop!
45:17Stop!
45:18Shit!
45:19Please!
45:21Hey!
45:22Hey, Roscoe!
45:23Roscoe!
45:24Roscoe!
45:26There's boss hog in the road down there.
45:28Get out of the way.
45:28I'm going to hit you.
45:30Oh, I am going to hit him.
45:31Oh!
45:31Oh!
45:33Good!
45:35Good!
45:36Oh!
45:36Oh!
45:37What are you doing up there on my hood?
45:39I bet that's smart, isn't it?
45:41Dick!
45:42You look like a little fat hood ornament.
45:44Dick!
45:44Dick!
45:45Oh!
45:46Listen, boss, I am sorry.
45:48Don't stop me now.
45:49I'm after Duke boys.
45:50Well, you would just keep on chasing them Duke boys.
45:53They just robbed me again.
45:55They took all my illegal liquor money.
45:57Oh!
45:58They put it in this kind of sack.
45:59Oh!
46:00Go get them!
46:00Hey!
46:01Uh, boss.
46:02Yeah?
46:02Uh, you mean to tell me they put your illegal money in this sack?
46:06Yeah, in this sack.
46:07All my illegal liquor money right in this sack.
46:09Then why am I chasing the Duke boys if they put it in that sack?
46:13Because they gave it back.
46:17They gave it back.
46:18Good luck.
46:19They gave it back.
46:21You did your good luck.
46:22What's the matter with me?
46:24You tell me.
46:25They gave it back.
46:27Well, they're the craziest critters I ever did see.
46:30How's it new, boss?
46:31Roscoe?
46:32Oh, hello, Harvey.
46:33What are you doing here?
46:34Well, I couldn't help overhearing your conversation.
46:36You did?
46:37That's right.
46:38And I thought maybe you and me'd have a little talk about liquor money and taxes.
46:43Well...
46:44You see, Uncle Sam's running a little bit short on that stuff these days.
46:47Roscoe, you're a dipshit.
46:51Can't you keep your mouth shut in a public place?
46:55It was not me.
46:56It was...
46:57It was me, but it was...
47:01Oh, I know it's not your fault.
47:04It never is your fault, boss.
47:08Okay, it's toast time.
47:10What are we going to toast to?
47:11Do you all realize we just pulled off a non-robbery?
47:17Hey, y'all.
47:20Guess what?
47:21Think I finally broke in my new boots?
47:24They finally fit you.
47:27Say, Uncle Jesse, what do you think old Harvey Essis is going to do to boss?
47:31Same thing he used to do to us.
47:33Slapping with a great big fine.
47:37Don't forget our 10% of that liquor money for turning him in.
47:40That's right.
47:41Uncle Sam pay people to do that?
47:42Well, sure.
47:44But you know what I've been thinking?
47:47That money, that 10%, rightly belongs to Neil there.
47:52What do you think, boys?
47:53Well, sure.
47:55I think you ought to take that money and go back into chicken ranching.
47:58Well, thank you.
47:59Yeah, sugar, you sure are cute, but you're one lousy bandit.
48:03You can say that again.
48:06You know, you boys never did tell me how you got out of jail.
48:10Hey, Luke, I believe we forgot something.
48:15What's that?
48:16Enos.
48:18Oh.
48:20Oh, no.
48:22That's the legend of the big Hazard heist.
48:26One thing's sure.
48:28They don't do nothing in Hazard County like any place else.
48:31And that's the fun of it.
48:39He's not to be.
48:43He's not to be.
48:44He's not to be.
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