- 10 hours ago
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Short filmTranscript
00:01On the do!
00:03To Enos, the best dang deputy Hazard County ever had.
00:08Being the best in Hazard County ain't necessarily the same with somewheres else.
00:14You'll fire!
00:16Fire!
00:21Now, Bo!
00:25Ah!
00:27Great!
00:28Woo!
00:37Just a good old boy
00:40Never meaning no harm
00:44Beats all you never saw
00:46Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born
00:51Straightening the curves
00:54Planting the hills
00:55Someday the mountain might get them but the law never will
01:02Making their way
01:06The only way they know how
01:11That's just a little bit more than the law will allow
01:14Just a good old boy
01:18Wouldn't change if they could
01:21Fighting the system like a two modern day Robin Hood
01:27Yee-haw!
01:32Now you may notice something unusual here
01:35A Hazard police car that ain't chasing nothing
01:38And the reason Deputy Enos Straight is acting like a hound dog chasing his tail
01:42Is cause he's putting an edge on his driving skills
01:45You see, like most of us old Enos has had a secret dream
01:47And the difference between him and most folks is Enos is either too dumb or too smart to ever let live
01:54Enos' dream is to be a police officer in a big city
02:03Now the question that comes to mind, is there any big city ready for this?
02:07Now this is the story of how Lena Street, Reese Blackwood County, joined the Los Angeles Police
02:17Which never would have happened if the dudes hadn't been on their annual trip to Atlanta
02:21Y'all are keeping up with this, ain't you?
02:24Now remember Uncle Jeffy, you say cheese when I tell you
02:26That reminds me, I ain't had nothing but a friendly since breakfast this morning, now hurry it up!
02:34You make a move in the next two minutes and it'll be your last
02:37Come on Uncle Jeffy, give me a big ol' smile
02:48Paul's with a piece of cake, you never know what hit him
02:52Well they will now, you idiots
02:53That's enough picture taken, I'm all posed out
02:57She took your photograph and you come out of the bank
03:00Just after you've whipped off your ski mask
03:04Taylor!
03:06You'll grab that film at the first lonely spot she passes
03:08No traffic neither direction
03:24This is the place, run her off the road
03:27Run her off the road
03:47That feller must have won his license in a turkey hut
03:50No way Uncle Jesse, he knows exactly what he was doing
03:55Bo, look, can you come in for us, stop crying out loud
03:59We got you, Davey
04:01This old Jasper in a big sedan just tried to run me off the road about half a mile past Eagle Rock
04:07Well that means you can't be more than about a minute or so ahead of us
04:09Hey, just make that half a minute because it looks like it's going to try it again
04:21You watch the road, I'll watch now
04:23Okay
04:25This will come again
04:39No!
04:54No!
04:56Yo!
05:02No!
05:05No!
05:06Let's see if we can get a look at the plates.
05:17They ain't got no plates.
05:22Pull up before they're knocked us off the road.
05:25Get the belt.
05:26Trace the truck and that orange bomb for the last plate.
05:31Glad we live long enough to do it.
05:33Pull up, I said.
05:36I think we ought to chase after them fellas and teach them some manners.
05:44If he's using your mind, you know we better check on Uncle Jesse and Daisy
05:47and make sure they're safe.
05:48Make sure they stay that way.
05:54Thanks, guys.
05:55All turns to Davis in there.
05:56Anything to you, darling.
05:59Let's head on over to the junkyard and see if we can pick us up a new fender.
06:02Well, you try.
06:02We better pick up a new right quarter panel, a left quarter panel.
06:05All right, all right.
06:06If you're wondering what all this has got to do with Enos joining the L.A. police,
06:10well, we're getting to that.
06:12Meanwhile, back in Hazard,
06:13Boss was proving that it ain't but a short step from gluttony to gout.
06:17Brother Bob, where you been? I've been looking everywhere for you.
06:19Well, in a dang fool.
06:20We know I've been out on the football field practicing.
06:22Police went kicking with my soft foot.
06:25What'd you want anyway?
06:26Well, I want to talk to you about getting a job.
06:27Yeah? Oh, gotcha!
06:29What about the job at the junkyard?
06:31I got fired.
06:32You did?
06:33Well, you came to the right man at the wrong time.
06:35I got this here gouty.
06:37Oh, but don't forget, Cousin Boss, I'm a twin.
06:39Yeah?
06:40Well, if you call me a third cousin 20 times removed, Ken, then you can't.
06:45Well, let me see what I got here on the vacancy list.
06:48Well, now, how about the garbage truck, help?
06:51Garbage truck?
06:52Yeah, a piece of $10 a day and all you can eat.
06:55Oh, now, Cousin Boss.
06:56All right, you can be official time sent, he could.
07:00Oh, okay.
07:08Come on, Miss Tisdale.
07:09Come after me?
07:10You have to take a number just like everybody else.
07:12Yes, ma'am.
07:14Number one.
07:15That's me.
07:18Identification, Enos.
07:19Call me, Miss Tisdale.
07:21You've been knowing me since I was born, even before I was born.
07:24Sorry, Enos, but regulations is regulations.
07:29Thank you, Miss Tisdale.
07:30Bye.
07:30Bye.
07:31Ain't it a shame there ain't no place safe from bureaucracy.
07:34Hi, Luke.
07:35Hey, Bo.
07:35Hey, how are you?
07:36Hi, Daisy.
07:37Hey.
07:37Two letters in the same day.
07:39You know, if I didn't know better, I'd swear you was carrying on some sort of mail-order romance.
07:42Oh, you know I wouldn't do that, Luke.
07:44These here are just two more answers to my police department job application.
07:48New York City and Philadelphia?
07:50Why, Enos, you're really going after the big time, ain't you?
07:52Golly, I've been turned down by so many police departments.
07:55I'm almost afraid to open these.
07:57Oh, go ahead, Enos.
07:58Open the one from New York.
07:59Yeah.
07:59All right.
08:01Yeah, you read it, Bo.
08:03It says right here.
08:04It says, try applying to the Chicago Police Department.
08:06I'll bet you'll have your choice of three or four big city jobs by this time tomorrow.
08:12Exactly, Daisy.
08:13It seemed like I started sending out these applications when the postage was only three cents a letter.
08:18You all got a place to list all the important crimes you saw.
08:23All I could put down is rescuing Ms. Fenster's cat from a telephone pole and finding Adner Peabody's longjohns after Hurricane of 72.
08:32You just keep filling out those applications, Enos.
08:34I see y'all.
08:35You know, friends, I bet ol' Abe Lincoln's qualifications didn't look too good on paper when he started out, either.
08:42Remember these old boys?
08:44Well, here's where things start picking up steam.
08:47The first duties of a good police dog is to take orders immediately.
08:51Now get ready.
08:52All right.
08:53Eat, hut.
08:55Eat, hut.
08:58At ease.
08:59That's pretty good, Sheriff.
09:00He's got half of it down pat already.
09:02Enos, will you hush?
09:03Tip, stick, you just hush.
09:05Okay, I'm going to teach you one now that's really important.
09:07This one's called fetch.
09:08You ready?
09:09Now, okay, here it comes.
09:10Now, get ready.
09:11Here it goes.
09:13Fetch.
09:14Fetch.
09:14Fetch means in French.
09:16That means for you to go get it.
09:17Huh?
09:18Well, I'll tell you, I'm going to show you just this one time.
09:20Okay?
09:21Now, you've got to snip it out.
09:26And then you snap it.
09:27Ah!
09:28You're going to play with it.
09:29Ah!
09:30Ah!
09:31Ah!
09:31Ah!
09:32Ah!
09:32Okay?
09:32You know something?
09:38I didn't know these things were flavored.
09:40It reminded me I ain't had lunch yet.
09:45Yeah, let's hold down the porch, Sheriff.
09:50I'm going down to the eat price and get a corn dog.
09:53Get that.
09:54Oh, God.
09:59I'm going.
10:00I'm going.
10:01I'm going.
10:05Oh, gosh.
10:07Sorry.
10:07You got it again, huh?
10:08Yeah, no thanks to you.
10:09Well, why are you blaming me?
10:11Well, you let me marry that fat sister of yours.
10:13I'm going.
10:14I'm going to go to the rich cookin' now.
10:14All because of a rich cookin'.
10:14Now, got me the gout.
10:16No.
10:17No.
10:17No.
10:18No.
10:18Is that hound of yours still breathing?
10:19That's flash.
10:21I got a good deal on him.
10:22I got him from the police gazette magazine.
10:25I'll tell you one thing, boss.
10:27He can smell a crook about a mile off.
10:29I'm going to take these ladies' wanted posters from the capital city.
10:44Pack them up.
10:45Here.
10:45Here.
10:46Oh, what do you got them other fool papers for, anyhow?
10:49Listen.
10:50I'm afraid I'm going to have to lead Hazard, Mr. Hogg, to save my self-respect.
10:54Well, how much self-respect do you need?
10:57You're already the most self-respected deputy we got around here.
11:00But I just can't go on taking part in all them dirty tricks you make us do.
11:06Dirty tricks?
11:06What dirty tricks?
11:08Name one.
11:08Go ahead.
11:09Name one of you, King.
11:10We're setting up bead traps for the tourists.
11:12Putting up no parking signs where people's already parked.
11:15Faking detours to make all the highways past the boar's nest.
11:19Charging me mileage when I'm on patrol.
11:21You shouldn't name one.
11:22We don't need the whole history of Hazard County.
11:24Insisting that I buy a new uniform every three months from Mr. Hogg's dry goods store.
11:28Man, you look nice in it, didn't you?
11:30Oh, Sheriff, I just can't go on obeying y'all's orders to frame the Duke boys into jail.
11:35Well, that's the American way, isn't it?
11:38Do unto others before they do unto you?
11:41Oh, no, sir, Mr. Hogg.
11:42It ain't.
11:43And that's exactly why I've been trying to get another job someplace else.
11:47Man's got to do what he's got to do, Mr. Hogg.
11:51Well, you're going to do what you're going to do, and I'm about to do what I'm going to do.
11:57You're fired.
11:58Fired?
11:59Fired.
12:00Oh!
12:01Here, here's the Friday.
12:03You are hereby dismissed.
12:04This car's disassembled.
12:05And I'm disconnected.
12:06Ooh.
12:07Don't let them see that car!
12:09Don't let him see that car.
12:20I'm going to thank the motor vehicle department.
12:22They let us straight to that old football.
12:25The pickup's registered to the same address.
12:28A place called Duke Farm.
12:36Here you go. He takes film now. He'll be there by noon.
12:38Yeah, it says one day service.
12:40We ought to be able to get them things back out tomorrow afternoon.
12:44Tennis to him, Bo.
12:49Trying to realize you're such a big hurdy, get out of town, Enis.
12:51You must have six, seven letters there.
12:53I'm not in a hurry to get out of town, Bo.
12:55I love hazard. It's just a...
12:57Well, Mr. Hogg fired me a fixer Friday.
13:00He what?
13:01What possessed me to do a stupid thing like that?
13:03I told him and Sheriff I wasn't going to take part in no more dirty tricks to frame y'all.
13:08See y'all.
13:11Yeah.
13:13Thanks a lot, Enis.
13:15Okay, Bo. See you, buddy.
13:19That ain't right, Bo.
13:21Come on, let's do something about it.
13:23You know, snap and snarl and bite and get...
13:26Roscoe, we'd like a word with you about Enis.
13:31Oh, and what word would you like?
13:34Hockey puck, butter fingers, or just plain old dipstick?
13:39Roscoe, how could you let boss fire Enis when you know he does twice the work for half the pay as you or any deputy you've ever had?
13:45Bo, let me tell you something.
13:47I'm just as sorry about that as you are.
13:50Maybe even more so.
13:52But you know as well as I do that boss's word is law around here.
13:57And, you know, come Friday, you know where Enis' badge is going to be, don't you?
14:04It's going to be right here on the collar of this canine sleuth who works twice as fast, got a higher IQ, and works for dog biscuits.
14:15Well, I'm glad to see I ain't the only one who couldn't sleep.
14:19Nothing better if we can't sleep than bread and milk, have some.
14:23So far it ain't working, though.
14:25Yeah, well, let's not try to kid ourselves.
14:26The only reason we're up is because we're all worried about Enis.
14:28I can't believe that after all these years of faithful service to Hazard County, this boss would treat him like that.
14:33Well, the way J.D. treats him, you'd think he's one of us dukes.
14:36Well, he practically is, isn't he?
14:39We've got to be able to do something.
14:40Wait a minute.
14:41I bet if we circulate a petition, that way we could get boss hog, we could force him to do it.
14:46Well, everybody in Hazard County owes the boss money.
14:49What do you think he'd do if he saw their names on a petition?
14:51Uncle Jesse, there's got to be something we can do.
14:54Well, there's one thing for sure.
14:56We're not going to be able to help him if we're all bleary-eyed from lack of sleep.
15:00So let's get to bed and we'll pack it a new tomorrow.
15:03Yes, sir.
15:09Uncle Jesse, I...
15:10Yeah, maybe tomorrow's a whole new day.
15:13We'll figure something else.
15:14Maybe she left the camera in there.
15:27You search that on with your ball.
15:28What if we don't find anything?
15:30We'll just have to pay the dukes a surprise visit.
15:36Give me a hell of this damn horse!
15:38It's so late for that, you blew it!
15:40Let's cut out of here!
15:41Go on!
15:41I'll cover you!
15:42If you think getting out of bed is tough, just look how they do it in Hazard County.
16:01Get them lights out!
16:03Daisy, you get inside!
16:05I'm a-coming for it!
16:06Who was that?
16:17I don't know if it, Jesse, but I think it scared them away.
16:19Well, they ain't getting away that easy.
16:21Dang it, they shot out the fire in the gym.
16:24They got the dang pickup truck, too.
16:27Yeah, and they crippled the D-pillot.
16:30Two.
16:31Well, we sure as heck ain't gonna get very far on foot.
16:35Well, this sure hasn't been our day, has it?
16:37First some dumb cluck tries to run us off the road, then Lord knows who tries to do our pickup.
16:42There's two things we can do.
16:44We can, uh, start praying now, then get a hold of Roscoe in the morning.
16:49Shoot!
16:50Roscoe ain't gonna do nothing about it.
16:51Well, that's why I'm counting so much on the press.
16:57Of course, y'all gotta remember now that the Dukes have been shot at by everybody from Indians to revenuers.
17:04During the shooting, old boss was plucking a pigeon to feather his own nest.
17:09Now then, Cousin Cletus.
17:10Yes, sir.
17:10If you're gonna be a deputy sheriff around here, you gotta take a civil service exam.
17:16Uh-oh.
17:16And you gotta pay an examiner's fee of $25, you got it?
17:19Yep.
17:21I mean, the money.
17:22Oh, yes, sir.
17:24Uh, who do I pay it to?
17:25Pay the examiner.
17:27Okie-doke.
17:28Namely me.
17:29Oh.
17:30All right, now then.
17:32Question number one.
17:34If you're patrolling the street as a deputy sheriff and you see an out-of-state car parked on the street, what do you do?
17:39Uh, I walk right up into the nice folks and say, hi, welcome to Hazard County.
17:42Wrong.
17:44You pick this up and you put it on the curb next to the car.
17:48And then you write them up for parking tickets.
17:49Look, I never knew there was so much to being a deputy.
17:52Flash, you've got your own crime wave of fleas going here.
17:56Yes.
17:58Roscoe, we'd like to report an attempted burglary.
18:00Oh, who'd you burgle?
18:01Roscoe!
18:02Roscoe, we weren't the burglars.
18:03Well, it's sure a fact that you're not the burglaries because you dukes are poor.
18:09Everybody Hazard knows that.
18:10You're poor as church-mices.
18:12Mises.
18:13Mises.
18:13Mises.
18:14Then maybe they're strangers from out of town, Sheriff.
18:17Enos, of course they were strangers because they were the figment of these dukes' imagination.
18:20Come on.
18:22If they were real, you should have spotted them and I could have gone to the boss and saved your job.
18:27Hey, that ain't a half bad idea.
18:29Oh, that ain't gonna work.
18:30Ain't nobody gonna believe that.
18:32The boss sure ain't gonna believe it.
18:33And, of course, I don't even believe it.
18:35All right, you dukes.
18:36Ow!
18:36Ow!
18:36Just get out.
18:37Get out.
18:37Don't tell it, sir.
18:38I hate clutter.
18:39I hate movie about you.
18:40You're just out of there.
18:41Will you hush?
18:42I ain't...
18:43There.
18:45Now.
18:46Where were you?
18:47Oh.
18:48Oh.
18:49Here, here, here.
18:50Near the office.
19:04Meanwhile, the bank robbers are at it again.
19:06They had to get them pictures.
19:08Which meant getting days.
19:13That's all of Roscoe's patrols were designed so he could keep an eye on the dukes.
19:17It weren't no coincidence that Eunice was out patrolling that very same road later that day.
19:35Daisy, look out!
19:36Daisy, look out!
19:38Daisy, you ain't gonna be too happy with your driving skills.
19:56I'm gonna get my hand in this facility.
19:58Bo?
19:59Turn around.
19:59Do it real slow.
20:03Grab the girl and get her out of here.
20:05I'll keep her covered.
20:06Don't worry.
20:09Freeze!
20:10Now drop your gun.
20:14It is behind you!
20:15Take one more step and the next one will be on the way to your funeral.
20:22Hold on.
20:22We don't want them to hurt either one of them.
20:23It looks to me like an old officer ain't as straight as an awful long way from joining the Los Angeles police.
20:44Well, you boys just quit trying to pull the wool over this experienced officer's eyes.
20:50We do it all the time.
20:52I'll tell you one thing.
20:53If Daisy Duke has been kidnapped, then you boys must have kidnapped her.
20:58Why the heck would we do a stupid thing like that?
21:00Oh, so a stupid thing like this could catch the kidnappers, which don't exist in the first place.
21:07What happens to me ain't important.
21:09It's Daisy we're worried about.
21:10She was kidnapped.
21:11And I got this here lump on the back of my neck to prove it.
21:14How would you like a lump in front of your neck?
21:15Roscoe's going to take Cooter the rest of the week to fix that pickup truck.
21:18They'll run us clean off the side of the road.
21:20Oh, oh, now listen.
21:21You boys got to be careful now because faking a hit and run now, that is serious business now.
21:26You can get in real trouble for that.
21:28Not have as much trouble as what Daisy's in right now.
21:30Roscoe, they run us right off the road into the ditch deliberate just so they could take her.
21:35Oh, what for?
21:36Ransom?
21:37Oh, you dukes are poor.
21:39I mean, if money was polecat perfume, they couldn't smell them through a barbed wire fence.
21:45Look, Roscoe, you know that and we know that.
21:48But whoever took Daisy don't know it.
21:50And that sort of leaves her between a rock and a hard place, don't it?
21:53Oh, yeah, you know.
21:55That's a morning gun, Bush.
21:57You know, even though we know what we are, I guess we don't know who or why.
22:00Boss, that's him.
22:03That's Daisy.
22:04And some of her brand new friend.
22:07This here's Luke.
22:09I'll read you loud and clear.
22:10Come back.
22:11I'll make this short and sweet.
22:12Your cousin for that roll of film she just happened to take in Atlanta.
22:15What roll of film is that?
22:17All we know about is a couple of snapshots of our Uncle Jesse.
22:21Well, then, she can take some more of them when we let her go.
22:23Should I say if we let her go?
22:25I want the prints and the negatives.
22:27I want them fast.
22:28Uh, sir, I'm afraid we can't do that.
22:31See, we dropped the film off at the photo processing place and won't be back till this afternoon.
22:36Then there's nothing to say till then.
22:37That there's where you're wrong.
22:39Now, how can we be sure that Daisy's all right?
22:41Uh, don't worry about me, fellas.
22:44They ain't laid a hand on me yet.
22:45They ain't about to neither, Daisy.
22:47You just relax now.
22:49As long as I'm on the force, ain't nothing gonna happen to you.
22:52Take my word on it.
22:53Thanks, Enos.
22:54That makes me feel a whole lot better.
22:56Especially since everybody knows your words as good as money in the bank.
23:01No tricks now.
23:03You never want to see your cousin again.
23:05You know what Daisy said about money in the bank?
23:09Didn't it kind of sound to you like she was trying to tell us something?
23:11Like what?
23:13She sure laid heavy on the word bank.
23:15She could have meant, uh, piggy bank or blood bank.
23:18Maybe Boss Hogs Bank.
23:19I bet Atlanta National Bank.
23:20We got a teletype yesterday about it being robbed.
23:22Why y'all were in Atlanta?
23:24Well, it's just where she took them pictures of Uncle Jesse.
23:26Right in front of the bank, just before it opened.
23:29Wait a minute.
23:29You don't suppose she got them bank robbers in a snapshot purely by accident?
23:33They won't stop at anything to get that film back.
23:38Uh, afternoon, Miss Tisdale.
23:40Could I have my mail?
23:41It's that little yellow envelope you just put in the box there.
23:42Sorry, Bull.
23:43Can't hand it out until all the mail started regulations.
23:46In the meantime, take a number.
23:48Yes, ma'am.
23:49Number one.
23:50Right here, ma'am.
23:52Uh, sorry.
23:56This letter is addressed to Luke.
23:59Number two.
24:01Oh, yeah.
24:02Here you go.
24:03I'll show you your ID.
24:06Here's my ID, Miss Tisdale.
24:08Thank you, Lou.
24:09Be sure and say hello to your handsome Uncle Jesse for me.
24:12Yes, ma'am.
24:13Yes, have a nice day.
24:14Y'all come back now, here.
24:15All right, here they are.
24:19Here's one on the chest.
24:20Yeah?
24:21Hey, that clock reads 8.58.
24:22That's two minutes before opening time.
24:24Yeah, you're right about that.
24:25It's two minutes before opening time.
24:26The number two guys must be the bank robbers.
24:28I know those guys.
24:29I've seen them somewhere before I played, but I can't remember where.
24:31Country cousins from you know who.
24:34Sure hope you're smart enough to tell time.
24:37At least we're smart enough to know that you're going to be doing time if anything happens to Daisy.
24:42That all depends on whether or not you got the film.
24:44Yeah, we got the film all right.
24:46By the looks of it, we might better turn it over to the local sheriff.
24:49Now, tangling with sweet Daisy is about like trying to put socks on a rooster.
25:19Daisy, are you all right?
25:25Yes, for now.
25:26She'll be dead if you don't show up at Southside of Benson's Gulch at 4 o'clock with that film.
25:31I'm so mad I could chew nails.
25:33You reckon we'd better throw in a towel and give them the pictures?
25:37She was trying to tell us something.
25:39She said the fishing was terrible.
25:41Yeah, she was trying to clue us in as to where she's at.
25:43She did a pretty good job of it because there ain't but two places around hazardous where the fishing's bad.
25:47Yeah, that'd be the old quarry in Crater Lake.
25:50Now, the old quarry's over the hill, so we wouldn't get no radio transmission from here.
25:54It's got to be Crater Lake.
25:55There's a whole bunch of shacks up there, too.
25:57Yeah, but she ain't going to be in any one of them because she told us to keep on trucking.
26:01She's in a truck.
26:02It must be the same three-ton that ran us off the road.
26:05Maybe we can get the sheriff to help us now that we've got a bunch of evidence.
26:07Trouble is, Enos forgot that Roscoe tended to be just a tad bull-headed.
26:13You see them two fellers behind Uncle Jesse?
26:15The same ones that grabbed Daisy.
26:17Yeah, but now there's four of them.
26:18See, two more joined up with them.
26:20If you two don't pound the bung in a cider barrel.
26:23Now, I know what you did.
26:23You went to Atlanta and faked these pictures to sell me a bill of goods.
26:28Well, Flash and me, we just don't buy them.
26:31Do we, Flash?
26:31Well, that was a waste of time.
26:33As usual.
26:34Enos, do us a favor and put these someplace safe.
26:37I might be going with you.
26:39No, Enos, you ain't going anyplace.
26:41You're going to stay right here and finish the odds and ends before you join that throng of unemployed tomorrow.
26:53Sheriff, if you won't give me your permission, I'm going AWOL to help Daisy.
26:57Oh, no, no.
26:59Wait a minute, Enos.
26:59Enos.
27:00Let me just ask you one favor.
27:03Would you do me one little favor?
27:04Yes, sir.
27:05Before you go, there is a big hairy cockroach in that holding cell.
27:09And it gives me the queasies.
27:11Would you kill it for me?
27:12Then we let me go, Sheriff.
27:14Anything your heart desires, just kill that thing.
27:16Where's the broom, Sheriff?
27:18It's here.
27:18You're in the cell.
27:20Wait, wait.
27:21It's right there in the corner.
27:22It's a big fuzzy.
27:23It's a big antenna.
27:25Now, I've only got a cockroach in the holding cell, but I've got a lipstick, too.
27:28You lied to me, Sheriff.
27:30Yeah, I did.
27:32I had to, Enos, because if I'd let you go AWOL, it'd be on your record, and you wouldn't
27:36be able to get a job in any police department in the whole world.
27:39Some of the things that are done in the name of friendship, the shame of it all.
27:43You mae'r,力ни'r,力in'r,力in'r,力in'r,力in'r,'n'r,力in'r,力in'r.
28:00¶¶
28:29There's the truck we're looking for.
28:31I'm shitting up that tree up above.
28:33That way we ought to be able to hit them and talk about them at the same time.
28:36Let's do it.
28:51Now, Boat!
28:54It's empty up here.
28:57Down here, too. They must have flown the coop.
28:59You and the truck.
29:01Boat! Boat!
29:02Just step out there where I can keep an eye on you.
29:05You better do what they say.
29:09I figured you might have caught the hint of laden through you and tried to jump us ahead of time.
29:14That's why we've been waiting for you up here.
29:16Now, cross up that fence.
29:19We can't hardly do that. You didn't bring it with us.
29:22I'm lucky. I didn't forget to bring this.
29:25What's it gonna be?
29:27Sir, we ain't got the film. You gotta believe us.
29:30That's where you're wrong, Clowboy.
29:32All I gotta do is this.
29:35Look, we're telling the truth.
29:37There ain't no way we do nothing to put Daisy's life in danger.
29:40All right, we'll stick to the original deal.
29:43Bring that film to the south side of Benson's judge at 4 o'clock.
29:46When you do, you better be alone.
29:49She won't be going back with you.
29:52Better check. It's almost four now.
30:00Hi, boss.
30:01You mulching on those pralines again, huh?
30:04No.
30:05I bet that's about five pounds you've eaten since lunch.
30:08Mm-hmm.
30:09Aren't you afraid you're gonna get a gut ache?
30:11Well, I'm hoping to get a gut ache in my stomach to distract me from this couch ache in my foot.
30:17What do you want around here anyway?
30:19Well, boss, I was just thinking about Ennis, you know.
30:22You know, good deputies, they just don't grow on trees.
30:26No, they hang from them by their tails.
30:28Uh, boss, uh, listen.
30:30I'm sort of getting used to Ennis, you know, and I sort of like to have him around.
30:34I was just wondering if I could get you to change your mind and unfire him.
30:37Well, why would I do a thing like that?
30:3915% of my pay.
30:41Well, I'm already collecting 15% of your pay.
30:44Oh, well, uh, how about 20%?
30:47Uh-uh.
30:48Uh, 25%?
30:49Uh-uh.
30:50Uh, boss, listen.
30:51Now, you know that Ennis works hard.
30:54You know, he works seven days a week and he works 14 hours a day.
30:57Now, I do know that he has some bad habits.
30:59I mean, he can't be bribed or bought or fixed.
31:02But even though he has those terrible faults, I'm willing to forgive him.
31:06If you are, you know, maybe give him another chance.
31:08Ooh!
31:09Huh?
31:1030% after taxes.
31:13The answer is still no.
31:14Still no?
31:15On the corner, I've already found someone who was willing to kick back 50% of his pay.
31:21Who, who could be that stupid?
31:22My third cousin, twice removed, Cletus Hall.
31:25Uh, Cletus?
31:26Yeah, Cousin Cletus Hall.
31:27Oh, he is stupid.
31:28I mean, I mean, even the dipsticks call him a dipstick.
31:31Well, then he'll fit in perfect with you, won't you?
31:34Now, get out of here.
31:35Well, right.
31:36Now, let's go.
31:38Ow!
31:39Oh, my foot!
31:40Oh, shoot!
31:41Yeah!
31:42Well, I didn't really...
31:43Don't kill!
32:08Agnes!
32:09Right here, Luke!
32:10What are you doing in there?
32:11I'm sorry, Luke!
32:12Where's him pitchers?
32:13What are you boys doing here?
32:14It's doing your job is alright.
32:16Don't kill that.
32:17No, Anish.
32:18Look at, Anish.
32:19Don't kill away, Paul.
32:20Anish!
32:21I'm gonna have you fired before you fired!
32:23What are you boys doing here?
32:25It's doing your job, it's all right.
32:26Wait a minute, it's all right.
32:27Don't you do that.
32:30No, Enid.
32:32Enid.
32:33Don't go away, boy.
32:34Enid, Enid, I'm going to have you fire before you're fired.
32:38Freeze!
32:40Enid, come right here.
32:42Here, Enid, push it.
32:43We ain't going to get away with this.
32:55Bo and Luke are just way too smart to have any truck with the likes of you, mister.
32:59Hey, they'd do anything for the likes of you.
33:03Video won't do them any good.
33:06What do you mean by that?
33:08Well, now, you are the only one who can identify me.
33:11I don't think I can let you live to do that.
33:41Have a good day.
33:45We...
33:47We...
33:47We...
33:50We...
33:51We'll...
33:52We'll...
33:52We'll...
33:54We...
36:24You coming?
36:25Are you kidding me?
36:27I'll stay here and shut up a roadblock in case they head back.
36:43Quite a leap.
36:44Think we'll get enough speed?
36:45Halfway across?
36:46Yeah.
36:47Ask me then.
36:48Ask me then.
36:49Yeah.
36:51Do you have a plan?
36:56Yep.
36:58Let's go.
36:59Take off thekick!
37:03Yeah!
37:05Get a fly!
37:33It looks like a split up.
37:35You know, we go left and take the right one.
37:37That road just built that hazard.
37:39We gotta cover it from all angles, remember?
37:41If you chase up those, I'm gone.
38:03We'll never ditch them this last itself.
38:17I know!
38:19We'll go to Hazard, get back to the ground.
38:21It hires up, shrewd.
38:23We'll never ditch them this last itself.
38:26I know...
38:27We'll go to Hazard.
38:29Get back!
38:31We'll go to Hazard, get back to the wheel.
38:53What are you doing?
38:55Taking a shortcut.
38:57I'm familiar with your shortcuts.
38:59We're gonna drive the general to an early retirement.
39:07Think we lost?
39:09Ha, you got as much gentler to do to them
39:11as I have sprouting horns, honey.
39:19All right, fellas, you better hunt me down.
39:21Ain't gonna believe it's coming.
39:23Yeah!
39:25Whoo!
39:27Ah!
39:29Old Bo picked that up when he was a linebacker at the Hazard County High School.
39:37You should have seen some of them games.
39:39I think you got their attention here.
39:41Mine too.
39:43I told y'all to hunt you down, didn't I?
39:45Doesn't look like you're gonna be able to use this cute little thing anymore, huh?
39:49Ha, ha!
39:51Bye-bye! See you later!
39:53Meanwhile, the boss was on his way to Rue Bottoms to get some more cramines.
40:05I'm sorry, Mr. Hogg, but have you seen a suspicious-looking car-truck go by here?
40:17The only suspicious-looking thing I've seen today is you, in front of the first aid of an officer.
40:22But Daisy could be in one of those vehicles, Mr. Hogg.
40:25And you could be doing the job you'll get paid for.
40:28For at least your last one hour and fifteen minutes.
40:31Now, here, do something.
40:34Take these here wanted posters and pack them up for free.
40:38What about Daisy, Mr. Hogg?
40:40We got them here, Daisy.
40:41Well, there ain't no reward for catching Daisy.
40:43And there sure is one for catching them crooks.
40:46Now, you quit chasing women and do your duty.
40:49That there's an order.
40:55örp
41:15Sucker boy in every minute.
41:19That's them!
41:29Friends, you're about to witness the Bulldog tenacity,
41:32which keeps old English dreaming and hoping.
41:35All them years of practice are about to pay off.
41:49I don't think so.
42:19Hey, Mr. Tisdale, it's me, Ennis Strait.
42:38Number one, I got my identification.
42:40Things must be getting better.
42:42I used to be counting on getting three rejections a day.
42:45Now I'm down to just one.
42:47Good luck to you, Ennis.
42:49Thank you, man.
42:49Thank you, Ennis.
43:20Catch you before you leave.
43:21Okay, Lou.
43:22Leave.
43:24California.
43:25I believe.
43:26One gun.
43:27Nine, five, eight, six, two, four.
43:28And so, we come to Deputy Ennis Strait's last official minute as a member of the Hazard County Sheriff's Office.
43:34You have a hat?
43:36Ennis, give me the hat.
43:37Just give it to you.
43:39Just give it to you.
43:39Oh, well, let's see.
43:42Let's see.
43:45All right, last few more.
43:47Ennis.
43:48Ennis.
43:56Ennis, it's just a bit.
43:58Ennis, I'm going to knock you in a...
44:02Not this time.
44:05Get out.
44:08Come on.
44:13Come on, get out.
44:14Just get out and stay out.
44:17Just...
44:18Stay out.
44:23Just...
44:24Stay out.
44:26Naturally, the Dukes wasn't going to let old Ennis leave town without throwing a humdinger of a farewell party.
44:33I'd like to propose a toast to Ennis, the best dang deputy Hazard County ever had.
44:40Here, here, here.
44:41Here.
44:44Ennis, here's to wishing you all the luck and happiness and your new job.
44:48Thank you, Daisy.
44:51Ennis, me and Luke are sure going to miss you a whole heck of a lot.
44:54Especially when we've got them sirens and lights going on behind us.
44:57We make sure that Cletus dedicates his first illegal parking ticket to you.
45:00Thanks, Luke.
45:02I'd like to propose a toast to the best friends a fella could ever have.
45:15Appreciate the ride to the airport, Daisy.
45:16Well, you're nervous about flying?
45:19Yeah, I've never flown anything except the car.
45:23You promised a ride.
45:24I'll try it.
45:32Ennis, I almost forgot.
45:38It's for luck.
45:40From all of us, Dukes.
45:41We're all proud of you, Ennis.
45:42Well, I'll try not to let y'all down.
45:52Oh, Ennis, I hate my goodbyes, don't you?
45:57I don't know.
45:58I've never been anyplace.
46:06Bye, Daisy.
46:07Friends, you just wait till you see what happens
46:21when the oldest virgin in Hazard County joins the Los Angeles police.
46:54Now, you're like, try not to die.
46:57Hey!
46:58Oh, my God.
46:59I don't know.
47:00Put your Adamに行 on.
47:01Oh, my God.
47:01I don't know.
47:02But I won't.
47:03Listen, when we're doing a meeting today,
47:10I got out for you.
47:13Oh, my God.
47:15Uh-huh.
47:15Oh, my God.
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