The Bernie Mac Show is a beloved comedy series that showcases Bernie Mac’s unique humor, sharp wit, and unforgettable storytelling 😂🔥 When Bernie and his wife take in his sister’s three children, everyday family life turns into hilarious chaos. Packed with heart, laughs, and life lessons, this sitcom remains a fan favorite and a television classic.
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#berniemacshow #berniemac #sitcom #comedy #classiccomedy #comedygold #familycomedy #tvseries #funnyclips #tvclassics #cultclassic #comedymoments #throwbacktv #2000stv #entertainment #retroshows #iconicshows #viralvideo #fyp #explorepage #nostalgia #television #comedyshow #legendarycomedy #dailymotion #mustwatchtv #classicseries #laughoutloud #familysitcom #tvlegend
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FunTranscript
00:00Who you with?
00:17See, when filling out college applications,
00:19what you want to do is you want to put them in order of priority, alright?
00:22You want to do it based upon curriculum, accreditation,
00:26or whether or not it's geographically desirable.
00:28Got me?
00:29Mm-hmm.
00:30Okay.
00:33The NASA?
00:35This one's in Paris.
00:38Huh.
00:39I don't know how that got in there.
00:43I got it!
00:48Hi!
00:49I'm Judy Wasserstein.
00:50This is my son David.
00:51We just moved in down the street.
00:53Oh, I'm Bernie Mac.
00:54Welcome to the neighborhood.
00:56Oh, how nice.
00:56You have children.
00:58Yes, this is my nephew Jordan.
00:59Jordan, this is Miss Wasserstein and her son David.
01:02Hey.
01:03Hi.
01:04We were hoping there were other children in the neighborhood around David's age.
01:08Well, I'm quite sure Jordan and David get along real well.
01:12Am I right, Jordan?
01:14Oh, right!
01:17Doggone America, it's my job to expand his horizons, whether he like it or not.
01:22I didn't know a lot of Jewish folks growing up either.
01:24But now, some of my closest friends are Jewish.
01:28My agent, my lawyer, my accountant, even my doctor.
01:32He's cool with me.
01:33Only way to go.
01:35Oh, here we go.
01:37Boy, what's your doggone problem?
01:38I was rude of you.
01:39Uncle Bernie, he's a nerd.
01:41Nerd or not, you're going to be a good neighbor and you're going to play with that kid.
01:50No, Vanessa's a great student.
01:52It's just that it's competitive, right?
01:55So I wanted to be realistic and consider some state colleges.
02:00Yeah.
02:02Uh-huh.
02:05Get out.
02:24So what do you want to do?
02:30Oh, no way.
02:31You have the wireless controllers?
02:32Uh, I...
02:33I can't.
02:34It's the Sabbath and we're not allowed to use electricity until Saturday night.
02:38It's a Jewish thing.
02:39My mom must have been Jewish, because in Chicago, it was the Sabbath a lot.
02:44Wait, wait, wait.
02:45Would you be breaking the rules if I worked the controllers while you told me which aliens
02:49to shoot?
02:50I guess not.
02:51I never thought about that before.
02:53Ha-ha.
02:55There's not a rule, man.
02:56Who made that?
02:56I can't get around.
02:57Ha-ha.
03:00Okay.
03:01Uh, so press...
03:01Press up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, and start, and that'll get
03:06you unlimited ammo.
03:07Should you be using cheat codes on the Sabbath?
03:10Technically, you're using them.
03:13Hey, I thought this game doesn't come out for a month.
03:15How'd you get it?
03:15Uh, my cousin's a beta tester.
03:17In fact, he's gonna have the arcade version of this game at his bar mitzvah this Saturday.
03:21You wanna go?
03:22I was gonna say I'd be a bunch of video game nerds, huh?
03:25Probably.
03:26Sounds like fun.
03:29You wanna see how many donut holes I can step in my mouth?
03:35My record's 13.
03:37Not now, Brianna.
03:38I'm writing an essay for my college applications.
03:41What for?
03:42I wonder thinks you're wasting your time.
03:44What are you talking about?
03:45I heard her say you have no chance of getting into Berkeley.
03:48She said that?
03:49That and something about aiming too high.
03:54I can't believe she would talk about me behind my back.
03:56What the family says is right about her.
03:59She is bougie.
04:03Therefore, at the age of 13, a boy is responsible for his deeds spiritually, ethically, and morally.
04:12Leviticus 19, 18.
04:14Vahavta l'riacha kamoha.
04:16You should love your neighbor as you love yourself.
04:19Treat others the way that we would want to be treated.
04:22Amen.
04:22Amen.
04:23Amen.
04:24Amen.
04:25Oh, man.
04:26I don't care what you guys call it.
04:27This was church.
04:27You owe me.
04:30How's that for payment?
04:35Holy Jesus.
04:36Yeah.
04:37In here, we say Holy Moses.
04:39Oh.
04:40Good service.
04:40Well, it's your house.
04:41I'm just here to party.
04:48Ready?
04:49Player two.
04:50Sweet.
04:55Man.
04:56Man, this party's awesome.
04:59Oh.
04:59Nice.
05:01Let's go dip stuff in the chocolate fountain.
05:05There's Alana.
05:07I've liked her since the first grade.
05:08Why don't you dance with her?
05:10She thinks I'm a little nebbish.
05:12A nerd.
05:13No, no.
05:14You're not a nerd.
05:15You just need an in.
05:16I mean, if I can get you two together on the dance floor, will you dance with her?
05:20How you gonna do that?
05:23You know how the electric slide?
05:25Let's do it.
05:27And right.
05:28And left.
05:29And left.
05:30And left.
05:31And left.
05:33And left.
05:33And left.
05:34And left.
05:36Get in.
05:38Hi there, Alana.
05:40She said hi to me.
05:42I know.
05:42Just dance.
05:43And left.
05:45And left.
05:45I knew.
05:47Electric's mine.
05:48And.
05:49And left.
05:50And left.
05:52And left.
05:53And left.
05:55It's electric.
06:03It's electric.
06:06I know.
06:06Do, do.
06:07Take it, sir.
06:08This dance is not so hard to do.
06:12Do, do.
06:13Do, do, do.
06:14Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
06:14Hey, George.
06:15Oh, hey, Uncle Bernie.
06:17You have a good time with Davey?
06:18It was great, Uncle Bernie.
06:20You were right about opening my mind to other cultures.
06:22It gave me a sense of fulfillment.
06:26I'm glad to hear that, boy.
06:27I'm glad to hear that.
06:28I'm exhausted, Uncle Bernie.
06:29I'm going to go take a schvitz and then plots.
06:35What's up?
06:38You see that, America?
06:40My plan worked.
06:42See, I'm not the one to spend my own dreidel
06:44or a gefilte fish for a compliment,
06:46but by showing joy to a new culture,
06:49I did a mispho.
06:50Oh, I'm sorry, that's Yiddish for a solid,
06:53which is a south side of Chicago for a boom,
06:55which is...
06:57Anyway, America,
06:59let me finish exposing joy into some culture,
07:02and I'll get back to y'all real soon.
07:05Ta-ta.
07:11Last night was so much fun.
07:13I did so hard, I emptied my inhaler.
07:16Yeah, me too.
07:17Thanks for inviting me.
07:19Oh, man, there was a lot of good stuff in those goodie bags.
07:22I wish there was apartments for every weekend.
07:25Actually, there are.
07:26It's been a-mitcho season,
07:28and all the kids at my school are having one.
07:30Wait, you go to another school after your regular school?
07:33And on Sunday.
07:35You definitely need to party.
07:37But since I'm new in town,
07:38I'm not invited to any.
07:40So how are we supposed to get in?
07:42If your people can find their way through the desert,
07:44I'm sure we can find our way
07:45into Encino Gardens Banquet Hall.
07:50Yeah, I know.
07:52And she's got some nerve talking about me.
07:55Well, now I won't feel so guilty about tonight.
08:01Hold on a sec.
08:02Let me get back to my room.
08:17Don't tell anybody what we're doing.
08:25Ah!
08:52Going somewhere?
08:53What are you doing sneaking out?
08:54What are you supposed to be studying?
08:56What do I need to study for?
08:58You said I would never get into college anyway.
09:00What are you talking about?
09:02Brianna told me what you said
09:03about me not being good enough to get into Berkeley.
09:06What?
09:08What?
09:10I just meant that it's competitive,
09:12and you seem like you're not applying yourself.
09:15Like, for instance, sneaking out.
09:17Brianna told you that too, huh?
09:20Maybe.
09:22Yeah, well, if she'll tell my business,
09:24you know she'll tell yours to somebody else.
09:28Yeah.
09:29I think you're right.
09:31See how smart you are?
09:34Now prove your brilliance.
09:36And get out.
09:42Wow.
09:43Check it out.
09:43Put one of those on.
09:44Pull those on.
09:45Ah, no, it's not a hat.
09:47See, it's called a yarmulke.
09:49Got it.
09:51You know what?
09:52Try another.
09:52That's not working for you.
09:55Here you go.
09:55Pick it up.
09:57Dude, you are so cool.
09:59You are so cool.
10:00You're wearing the yarmulke.
10:01You're wearing it well.
10:02All right.
10:04Yarmulkes?
10:05Check.
10:06Talos?
10:07Check.
10:09Inhalers?
10:10Check.
10:13What if they ask the invitations?
10:15Just follow my lead.
10:16If you've been to one of these things,
10:17you've been to them all.
10:22Uh, uh...
10:23Oh, we just stepped outside for some air.
10:25He's an asthmatic, so we know where we're sitting.
10:27You know, I don't remember seeing you two at the ceremony.
10:32Uh, um...
10:33Uh-oh, you don't?
10:34Uh-oh.
10:35It was lovely.
10:35I mean, the best part was when the rabbi quoted Leviticus 19, 18.
10:40Yes, that was lovely, wasn't it?
10:48Well, enjoy the party.
10:50Three schools and all you come up with is, uh, uh.
10:54Hey, we're in, aren't we?
10:55No, thanks to you.
10:56How's my head?
10:57Yarmulke!
11:02Well...
11:03You know you make me wanna...
11:05So kick my heels up and down
11:07Throw my hands up and down
11:08Throw my head back and down
11:10Come on now
11:11Don't forget to say you will
11:13Drain-o, drain-o, drain-o
11:15Yeah, yeah, yeah
11:17Say you will
11:19Say it right now, baby
11:21Say you will
11:22Come on, come on
11:24Say you will
11:26I've made it out of place
11:27Come on now
11:29Say that you love me
11:30Say that you need me
11:32Say that you want me
11:34Say you wanna please me
11:36Say it right now, say it right now
11:39Say it right now
11:40When it's nice and bad
11:41Oh, I'm gonna play that dreidel
11:44I feel love
11:50Yeah, yeah
11:52Every time I think about you
11:54Whoa, is that a bit out of place?
11:56You feel so good to meet us
11:58Let me see
11:58You know you make me wanna
12:00Say it right now, say it right now
12:01Oh, I'm gonna play that now
12:02Oh, I'm gonna play that now
12:04Kick my heels up and down
12:05Come on now
12:07Take it easy
12:08Take it easy
12:10Take it easy
12:10Take it easy
12:11I don't feel louder now
12:12I don't feel louder now
12:13I don't feel louder now
12:14Hey, hey, hey, hey
12:17Hey, hey, hey
12:19Hey, hey, hey
12:23Hey, hey, hey
12:26Hey, hey
12:39Oh look at that, it looks like someone Beijer has a blast of a time last night
12:43Uncle Bortie please not so loud
12:45Coming down from the sugar. Well, I guess you wouldn't want this package. It came for you from Jeff Green
13:10Invited to Jeff Green's bar mitzvah his dad's a dot-comer, but he got right before the bubble burst
13:15Oh, man, they're having a medieval theme complete with knights maidens and a feudal surf
13:22Wow, that's real velvet on the bird check out the quality. That's nice. I mean, I gotta pick out my
13:27outfit
13:27I cannot go to that looking like a Schmendrick
13:34Look at that the boy got an a-lis invite you see that America if you open yourself up to
13:41new experiences the world will reward you
13:44Man, I mean they go all out for these things. The only thing I got when I was 13 was
13:49a water bill put in my name
13:51Big mama said if I was mad enough to take a shower twice a day. I was mad enough to
13:55pay for
14:04Brianna honey, can you keep it down? I need to make a quick call
14:15Oh
14:16I don't know
14:18Brianna hasn't had her room for too long
14:19But please she won't miss it when we turn into a song, though
14:22Yeah, it's amazing how young kids just seem to adapt to whatever we throw in front of them
14:30Hey, guess whose bar mitzvah's this Saturday. I know. Can you believe it? Hey, you gotta wear that dress shirt
14:36You know with the raised collar the ladies can't get enough of that one. Yeah, that would go well with
14:40my new blazer
14:41So what are you gonna wear?
14:42My father says that wearing a black suit during the reading of the Haftor makes me look more dignified
14:46We like to keep it old school
14:49Hey, wait a minute. Why would you be doing the reading?
14:53It's my bar mitzvah. Why wouldn't I be doing it?
14:58Oh, yeah, so what was I thinking?
14:59It's gonna be a very small traditional party, you know, just for close friends and relatives and my bubby's flying
15:05in from Boca
15:06Oh, man, I just remembered I can't go
15:11I'm gonna be out town on Saturday
15:12What you you can't you got to be there. It's my big day. I completely forgot about the trip. I'm
15:19so sorry D
15:20Um, I gotta go though. I'll see you later
15:28Yo, Jordan, come here a sec
15:32Look here son, you're an expert. You think gators are appropriate for David's bar mitzvah?
15:37Wait, you're going to David's bar mitzvah?
15:39Yeah, the whole family was invited
15:40No, but you can't go Uncle Barney
15:41Why not?
15:42Because I told David I was gonna be out of town that weekend so I could go to Jeff Green's
15:46bar mitzvah
15:46He's giving away plasmas
15:48Man, I thought you and he was boys. I can't believe you choose material things over your friendship
15:54Wait, I don't think you hurt me. They're giving away plasmas
15:58Look son, you're 13 now. I'm not gonna make you go. You got to make your own decisions
16:02But me and the entire family, we're still going
16:04But what am I gonna tell David?
16:06I don't know. You have to figure this one out on your own
16:10I don't know
16:14I'm just testing him America like God tested Abraham
16:19I'm not worried. I know he'll come around cause doing the right things in the Mac blood
16:23That's right. It's up for maybe his mama
16:27Well daddy's blood ain't too helpful either
16:32Okay, I'm a little worried
16:41I just didn't know how to tell you so I lied
16:45I just didn't want to hurt your feelings
16:47Hurt my feelings?
16:49No, no, it's fine
16:50You know if you're cool with not being there, I'm cool with you not being there
16:54I'm glad you understand
16:56Well, I'll see you later D
17:04See? That's what I was worried about America
17:07The boy ain't like Abraham, he's like his daddy
17:10Running out on folks, not showing up, breaking promises
17:14Boy, you ain't
17:17The son of the commandment understands that friendships enrich and strengthen our wisdom and character
17:25True friends are those who have a meaningful and lasting relationship
17:30The material gains of this world are temporary
17:34But true friendship lasts a lifetime
17:37So when the final chapter is written
17:40God will look into the hearts of men and ask
17:44Who are you with?
17:52So Mazel Tov to my cousin David
17:54May he never find himself on the wrong side of an isosceles triangle
18:03Now that we've had all of David's family up here
18:06It's time for some of his friends to come up and light a candle
18:22What?
18:23You gotta get up there and say something on Jordan's behalf
18:26I don't think David has any friends
18:28Come on now, why not wanna go up there?
18:31What am I supposed to say? I don't know these people
18:33I don't know you're a comedian says I'm funny
18:36Fine
18:38I'd like to say something
18:48I once heard a rabbi say that a friend is someone who sees my faults better than I see them
18:54myself
18:55But has the patience and the grace to forgive
18:59Aww
19:00To my friend David
19:02Yashur Kawash
19:08Mazel Tov!
19:11Yes
19:12Yes
19:13Yes
19:16Wow
19:17Well it meant you
19:20Yeah!
19:22Not at all
19:24Whew, I cannot do another horror, my feet are killing me
19:28I really need to go talk to Dave's cousin Abe, he's a podiatrist
19:32Son, you did real good today
19:35And I know it must have been real hard for you to come here today, wasn't it?
19:40Yeah, I know I was wrong
19:42But Dave's a good friend and I shouldn't have treated him like that
19:45You know what son, it might be his bar mitzvah
19:48But today, you're a man
19:53Come on, Jordan, we're doing the electric sliding
19:54Nice
19:55Have a toothpick
20:00Hey, Aunt Wanda
20:02When we get home, can you help me spruce up my drill team outfit?
20:06I was thinking we could put some tassels and sequins on it
20:09Really make it pop
20:10Yes, of course, I think that would be fun
20:12And you know what?
20:13I just ordered enough new sewing machine equipment to fill up the whole room
20:18Hey, maybe I could make some extra money doing alterations for my friends
20:23We could even start our own business right out of the house
20:26Now you're thinking
20:28Uncle Bernie, please, Aunt Wanda, take my room
20:31You know what you talking about?
20:32I heard Aunt Wanda on the phone
20:34And she said she was going to kick me out and turn my room into a sewing room
20:38Aunt Wanda can't sew?
20:40Babe, why are you teasing the girl?
20:42Trying to teach her a lesson
20:43Well, if you're trying to teach her a lesson, just teach her
20:46You know, instead of scheming and plotting, just come direct with her
20:48Look at her, you got baby girl all upset
20:51Thank you, Uncle Bernie
20:52You're welcome
20:52Now I know why you spend an extra day on the road instead of coming straight home
20:56What?
20:58What?
21:00You're intercepting text messages now, huh?
21:02Tell you something, baby girl, if these white folks wasn't here, I'll break you off a little something
21:05I'm not getting with you
21:07America, I got the boy on track
21:10Now I have to teach that girl to keep her damn mouth shut
21:13Now I gotta come straight home
21:16Messed up my tea time
21:21Thank you, Rashawn
21:23And thanks, honey
21:24I'm just testing them, America
21:26I got taste
21:28Man
21:31Watch this
21:34Olé
21:39What is olé?
21:42Okay
21:49Olé
21:54What is olé?
21:56How is this?
21:56There's, there's a story
21:56I got to pick about the whole thing
21:56I don't want to add over
21:56I don't want to add a little bit
21:57You know, like that out of my friends
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