The Bernie Mac Show is a beloved comedy series that showcases Bernie Mac’s unique humor, sharp wit, and unforgettable storytelling 😂🔥 When Bernie and his wife take in his sister’s three children, everyday family life turns into hilarious chaos. Packed with heart, laughs, and life lessons, this sitcom remains a fan favorite and a television classic.
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#berniemacshow #berniemac #sitcom #comedy #classiccomedy #comedygold #familycomedy #tvseries #funnyclips #tvclassics #cultclassic #comedymoments #throwbacktv #2000stv #entertainment #retroshows #iconicshows #viralvideo #fyp #explorepage #nostalgia #television #comedyshow #legendarycomedy #dailymotion #mustwatchtv #classicseries #laughoutloud #familysitcom #tvlegend
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00:35.
00:35And this feels like a good cigar.
00:41Look at that smoke.
00:43That's good cigar smoke there, boy.
00:47But I ain't here to talk about cigars.
00:50I'm here to tell you that I'm going to kill one of them kids.
00:56Oh, don't get me wrong.
00:57I love them.
00:58They my blood.
00:59I give them the shirt off my back.
01:01You ever see a chicken with his neck run?
01:03Laying to the side of the old ladies and weak.
01:05That's what I'm going to do to them kids.
01:06Talk back to me one more time.
01:07Snap.
01:08I'm going to snap their neck off.
01:11They're too sassy.
01:12They're too grown today.
01:13They talk back too much.
01:15Yeah, I know what you're saying to Mac.
01:16I don't care what you're talking about.
01:18Bernie Mac crew.
01:19Bernie Mac beat his kids.
01:20I don't care.
01:22That's your opinion.
01:24Because you don't know the story.
01:25You don't know what went down.
01:28And they're not my kids.
01:30So why are you mad at me?
01:34Because they turned you in.
01:37Girl, you stole from them.
01:39I'm going to turn you in.
01:40America, let's talk.
01:42Yeah, my sister's on drugs.
01:43That's okay.
01:44Some of your family members messed up too.
01:46What am I supposed to do?
01:48Allow these three kids to go to the state or some foster home or some white couple.
01:53Hold on.
01:54This ain't about race.
01:55It's not about race.
01:56I just don't want to hear them talking all properly like that.
01:58You know what I'm saying?
01:59That's all I'm trying to say.
02:00Oh, they got to sit there and share food with 40 other kids.
02:03No, that ain't right.
02:05I'm trying to do the right thing.
02:08And sometimes the right thing may not be the right thing.
02:12But I'm going to do the right thing.
02:14Just be careful.
02:18Did you hear what I said?
02:21You don't know what you're getting yourself into.
02:25Are you listening to me?
02:27Yeah.
02:28Yeah.
02:29Bernie Mac.
02:35I feel for his sister.
02:37But what does Bernie Mac know about raising kids?
02:39He's a comedian.
02:41He tells your mama jokes.
02:43And how am I going to explain to AT&T that I'm late for work again
02:46because my husband's taping a TV show
02:49and I spent the morning cleaning poop out of the light socket?
02:53They don't play a bit.
02:54They are AT&T.
02:58That's just my opinion.
03:01No!
03:11A boy's born in hard time, Mississippi.
03:16Surrounded by four walls that ain't so pretty.
03:22His parents give him love and affection.
03:26To keep him strong.
03:28Moving in the right direction.
03:30Living just enough.
03:34Just enough.
03:35For the city.
03:40Excuse me, are you Bernie Mac?
03:42Yeah, yeah, I'm Bernie.
03:43Are you waiting for three children?
03:44Yeah.
03:44Oh, we have a little problem.
03:47What's the problem?
03:48What do you mean you don't want to get off the plane?
03:50Well, the two girls are fine.
03:51But the little boy just freaked out on our descent.
03:54He was crying.
03:55Then he started coughing.
03:56He sounded pre-asthmatic.
03:57I know, because my nephew, Timmy, is a priest.
04:00Sounds exactly like that.
04:01Anyway, he kept saying he wanted to go home.
04:03It was really sad.
04:04Oh, and I think he wet his pants.
04:06Anyway, I told Stephanie, give him some wings.
04:08I get it.
04:10Okay.
04:10Mr. Mac?
04:11Yes.
04:11They're this way.
04:19Hey.
04:20Hey, kids.
04:22It's your Uncle Bernie.
04:25What the hell was that?
04:30Hey, little man.
04:31I'm so sorry, man, about stepping on your foot.
04:36Well, listen, you all going to really love it here.
04:38You are.
04:39It's going to feel just like home.
04:40Trust me.
04:41Oh, you leaving the projects?
04:43Oh, you're pretty funny there, little girl.
04:46Pretty funny there.
04:47Real nice.
04:49Hey, look at that.
04:50Look at that.
04:50Look at that big-ass donut.
04:52Anybody want a big-ass donut?
05:01That's the best big-ass donut I've ever had in my life.
05:06Damn.
05:08Mm-mm-mm.
05:11Anybody sure they don't want to bite you this big-ass donut?
05:13We don't feel like eating.
05:16Good.
05:16You ain't got to eat.
05:18You ain't hurt me.
05:20I'm full.
05:22My stomach hurt anyway.
05:26Sorry, Tom.
05:28Know what I should have got?
05:30Damn.
05:31I should have got a big-ass chocolate milk.
05:35Uncle Bernie, you're funny.
05:37No, I'm funny, I'm funny, man.
05:43No, what's wrong, baby?
05:44What's wrong with you?
05:45I want to do that, too.
05:48Oh, baby, there ain't no problem here.
05:50You can have anything you want.
05:52Whatever you want, just ask your Uncle Bernie, hear?
05:54Can I have a big-ass bite?
05:56Watch your mouth.
06:14All right, kids.
06:16Home sweet home.
06:21Hey!
06:23Come in!
06:24Come in!
06:25Welcome home!
06:26Oh, you kids have grown!
06:29Hi, Iwanda.
06:32Now, I know you kids have been through a lot lately,
06:35and I want you to know that we love you very much, okay?
06:39Can't you spend a day with us, Aunt Wanda?
06:42Oh, sweetness.
06:45Your Aunt Wanda would like nothing better
06:47than to spend tomorrow filling her heart full with your sugar.
06:51But your Aunt Wanda works for AT&T, Precious,
06:54and she can't just up and miss.
06:55They don't play that.
06:57Okay.
06:58And all of us to live as a family,
07:00I got to set down a few house rules.
07:02First, this is my house.
07:05Don't get me wrong.
07:06This is our home, but this is my house.
07:09Me castle is me castle.
07:12Close your mouth, boy.
07:13Second, in my house is all my stuff.
07:18And you are not to touch my stuff without my permission.
07:24Let me break it down.
07:26Don't touch my TV.
07:28Don't touch my DVD.
07:30Don't touch my dual-deck VCR.
07:32And most definitely, don't touch the remote
07:34that works the TV, the DVD, and the dual-deck VCR.
07:39Any questions?
07:40Can we touch...
07:41No, you can't touch nothing.
07:43Matter of fact, don't even look at it.
07:44When you walk past, it close your eyes.
07:46Come on over here.
07:46I got something else very important to show you.
07:48This is D.
07:51Don't touch my old school.
07:53My new school.
07:55My slow jams, my party jams, my happy rap.
07:59And you bet not touch my Jane Brown or somebody really gonna get hurt.
08:07You understand?
08:10Hmm.
08:12Now, y'all children, y'all come on.
08:14Let's have somebody's cream.
08:16Come on.
08:16Bernie Mac, why are you so strict?
08:19Tough love is good for him.
08:21I don't play.
08:22Never did play.
08:23Little small.
08:23Never smiled or nothing.
08:25I hate school.
08:26Could have had recess.
08:28Teacher told me to go outside for recess.
08:30I didn't go.
08:31Could I don't play?
08:38Didn't I tell you not to touch this, boy?
08:41Didn't I tell you not to touch this, Jordan?
08:43Yes or no?
08:45Oh, man, come on, come on, come on, don't start.
08:47What did I say all out?
08:49Stop that crying.
08:50All that deal to answer a question, now.
08:52Oh, no, you're not.
08:53No, you're not.
08:53You're wearing on yourself.
08:55Are you wearing on yourself?
08:57Come here, boy.
08:59Come here.
09:00What you wrong with me?
09:01Come on, man.
09:03Come here.
09:11I'm cool.
09:13Everything's cool.
09:14Everything's cool.
09:17If it don't apply, let it fly.
09:21You know.
09:24It's over.
09:31What?
09:33I need to go to the store.
09:35I need to go to the Bahamas.
09:45I need to pick up some things.
09:47We got things here.
09:49No, I need to pick up some, um, personal things.
09:54What type of personal things you need to...
09:57Oh, no, no.
09:58You're only 13.
09:59Oh, man, no, don't do that.
10:01You're only 13 years old, man.
10:03Whoo!
10:07I need my Bahamas.
10:13Oh, oh, Jordan.
10:15Why you telling me?
10:18Cover your mouth.
10:20Boy's nasty.
10:22Hey!
10:24Hey!
10:25Hey, hey!
10:26You're Bernie Mac, ain't you?
10:27Hey, brother.
10:28How you doing?
10:28Oh, Bernie, man.
10:30I ain't eating two weeks, brother.
10:33Two week eating.
10:33Two weeks?
10:34Just two.
10:35Hey, it's been so long, brother,
10:36I forgot what food tastes like anymore.
10:39Hmm.
10:39Man, you know what?
10:40I wouldn't even worry about it.
10:42No, why not?
10:43This deal tastes the same.
10:45Oh, yeah, you dead weight mother.
10:47Stop.
10:48Bernie Mac, man, I don't like your ass.
10:49Yeah, right.
10:50I don't like your ass.
10:51Yeah, okay.
10:52We got the fax from his doctor in Chicago.
10:55We have his medicines in stock.
10:56So just sign here.
10:58Sign right here?
10:59Yeah.
10:59Has he had any prevental today?
11:02Pro who?
11:03Prevental.
11:04It's for his cough.
11:06He wasn't coughing this morning.
11:07Well, what about tilator, flow vent?
11:10No, he's cool.
11:11I gave him a couple of Vicks about a half an hour ago.
11:14You gave him cough drops?
11:17Yeah, the cherry bubblegum kind.
11:20No, this boy's pre-asthmatic.
11:22Unless you use a steroidal inhaler,
11:24he's going to be in a lot of trouble.
11:27Are you the legal guardian?
11:28Look, ma'am, I'm doing the best I can.
11:31You know, just give me my medicine.
11:33Please.
11:35The cherry bubblegum kind, you know,
11:36you like that sweet.
11:37Give it back!
11:39No!
11:40Just, ma'am, please,
11:41can I have the cherry bubblegum?
11:43I'll be right back.
11:45Give it back!
11:46Hey, hey, hey, hey.
11:47Oh, give it back!
11:49Stop, stop, stop this argument.
11:51Stop it, stop it.
11:52You won't give it back.
11:54Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy.
11:56There's hundreds of boxes of cereal on there.
11:58Get some Count Chocolat or something.
12:00I don't want Count Chocolat.
12:02I want mine!
12:04Boy, quit being so soft here.
12:06You're always crying.
12:07You got to be a man.
12:08I don't want to be a man.
12:11I want my cereal.
12:13Boy, before you getting ready,
12:14you ain't fixing to piss up in here.
12:16I don't...
12:17I don't...
12:18I don't...
12:19I don't...
12:20Come here, come here.
12:22What's y'all looking at?
12:22What you looking at?
12:23Watch out, now.
12:25I'm cold here in.
12:26Watch out, watch out.
12:27You're in.
12:28I know you're trying.
12:29You can hold it, boy.
12:30Hold it.
12:31Ain't nothing but a little piss.
12:32Lady, look out.
12:33Lady!
12:34Lady!
12:35He peed on the film counter?
12:37You're in.
12:38Where were you?
12:39I was holding the boy.
12:41You held him while he peed
12:42on somebody's family photo?
12:44No, I was developing the film faster.
12:46What the hell you think I was doing, Wanda?
12:49I was trying to get the boy to the bathroom.
12:51I had his pants down.
12:52He ain't right.
12:54He ain't right.
12:55Bernie, those kids have been through hell.
12:57He probably just misses his mama,
12:59and that's his way of expressing it.
13:01When I was his age, baby,
13:02I missed my daddy, too.
13:03But I still held my damn bowels.
13:05Well, that's good.
13:06You know, but at some point,
13:07the boy got to be a man.
13:09I think that point is 18, not 8.
13:12Not everybody is as strong as Bernie Mac, you know.
13:17Man, you got that right.
13:19Mm-hmm.
13:23Medicine time.
13:30I gotta get used to this.
13:31I'm telling you.
13:32You will.
13:34Ooh, child, things are going to get easier.
13:40Ooh, child, things will get brighter.
13:45Ooh, child, things are going to get easier.
13:51Ooh, child, things will get brighter.
13:57Someday, yeah, we'll put it together
14:00And we'll get it undone
14:03Someday, when your head is much lighter
14:08Someday, yeah, we'll walk in the rays
14:11Of a beautiful sun
14:14Someday, when the world is much brighter
14:18Ooh, child, things are going to be easier
14:24Ooh, child, things will be brighter
14:31Ooh, child, things are going to be easier
14:36Ooh, child, things are going to be easier
14:39Wait, wait.
14:40He was in love with Grace Jones.
14:42Oh, man, come on.
14:43What are you doing now?
14:44She did something to me.
14:44Is it on you, Bernie Mac?
14:45Is it on you?
14:46Is it on me, man?
14:47I'm here.
14:47Or should I call you Daddy Mac?
14:48He got babies now.
14:49Oh, that's wrong.
14:50Hey, you need a kid, man.
14:53You could have asked me.
14:54I got a couple I ain't using.
14:56A couple I ain't seeing.
14:58I said something y'all real, real funny.
15:00Real funny.
15:01When you play with the bubbly, you can lick you in the mouth.
15:05You had a dog, you get your ass bit.
15:09She ain't lying right there.
15:10She was too funny.
15:10She was too funny.
15:14Yes?
15:16May I help you?
15:22You didn't want to do this.
15:24Yeah, she probably just didn't want to interrupt.
15:26That's her way of showing you respect.
15:29Give me the phone.
15:30What phone?
15:32See what I mean?
15:33I'm not going to knock again, Vanessa.
15:34Can you hold on, please?
15:37Who on the...
15:39Vanessa!
15:40He is tripping, okay?
15:42I'll call you back.
15:44Okay, bye.
15:48Didn't I tell you don't touch nothing without my permission?
15:50You didn't say the phone.
15:52I didn't say the phone.
15:53You said don't touch the TV, the VZR, the DVD, your old school, your new school, and your heavy rap.
16:01Yeah, but you never said we couldn't touch the phone.
16:04Technically, she's right.
16:06Technically.
16:08It ain't about the phone.
16:09It's about the simple things in life, about teaching you respect.
16:12You understand?
16:13Whatever.
16:14Whatever?
16:15Whatever ain't no answer.
16:17How about yes, sir, Uncle Bernie?
16:19You hear what I said?
16:21I ain't no to your what?
16:23What you say to me?
16:25Let me tell you something.
16:27I got news for you.
16:28I'm not trying to be your daddy.
16:29Good.
16:30Good?
16:31Good?
16:32Can you believe this?
16:34Y'all keep watching.
16:35It gets worse.
16:37Good.
16:38Like I'm a sissy sometime.
16:39Okay.
16:40You keep on talking to me with that attitude, little girl.
16:43I may not be your daddy, but I'll whoop your ass just like your daddy.
16:48And you'll go to jail like you was my daddy, too.
16:50Ooh.
16:58Don't come out.
16:59I'm going to bust your head to the white meat.
17:01Come on out, Vanessa.
17:01That's right.
17:02I said I'm going to bust her head to the white meat show.
17:06And I ain't ashamed that I said it.
17:07And ain't nobody going to make me take it back.
17:14Corporate punishment, man.
17:15I spanked the ball on his behind in the store.
17:17Who told you that?
17:18That's not important, Mr. Mack.
17:20No, no, no, Mr. Cooley.
17:21Who told you that?
17:22Well, the oldest girl.
17:23Vanessa, you can't believe anything she said.
17:26She's just a child, Ms. Cooley.
17:27She also said that you threatened to whoop her like you were her daddy.
17:32She gets me in front of my boys, Ms. Cooley.
17:36Now, come on.
17:37You just don't do that.
17:38Okay.
17:39Did you also say you're going to bust her head till the white meat shows?
17:44That's my boys.
17:46Mr. Mack.
17:47Come on.
17:48Mr. Mack, between that and the profanity.
17:51Hold on.
17:51I don't use no profanity in front of those children.
17:54That's a lie.
17:55Now, who told you that?
17:55You didn't say big ass donut?
18:00Who told you that?
18:02The littlest one.
18:03But the point is, is I'm here to help, not to hinder.
18:08You want the kids to live here?
18:10I want the kids to live here.
18:11You know I want the kids to live here, Cooley.
18:12Come on, now.
18:13Neither of us wants a situation.
18:19Come on, Cooley.
18:20Are you a smoker?
18:21Cigars.
18:22Every night, I smoke cigars.
18:23But you don't.
18:24No, no.
18:25I smoke in the den if I do.
18:27Only in the den.
18:28My wife.
18:30In the den.
18:32My wife, you know, like, I swear.
18:36Trying to take my babies from me.
18:40They take my babies from me, I'm lost.
18:42Without that, I'm nothing.
18:45Lord, you know I do everything you have.
18:47You can take the kids, but you can't take my babies.
18:54Y'all got the camera on.
18:56Ain't nothing sacred.
18:57Cut the camera off.
19:00I'm scared.
19:03Rihanna?
19:05Come here, baby girl.
19:09What'd you scare of?
19:11You?
19:12Me?
19:13Why are you scared of me?
19:15I'm sorry I broke your record.
19:19You told me not to judge you, but I judged you.
19:22I didn't mean to, but I did.
19:26That's all right.
19:27Don't worry about it.
19:29I can replace it.
19:31Really?
19:32No.
19:33But if you say you're sorry, that's the right thing to do.
19:37And I forgive you.
19:39And I'm sorry if I scared you, okay?
19:43Okay.
19:44I forgive you.
19:47You forgive me.
19:50Thank you, baby girl.
19:52Come on.
19:53Let's get back to bed.
19:55Come on.
20:01Uncle Bernie?
20:02Huh?
20:03Are you our daddy now?
20:07Huh?
20:09Nope.
20:10I'm still old Uncle Bernie, okay?
20:12Can I call you Uncle Daddy?
20:17No.
20:19You keep calling me Uncle Bernie, okay?
20:23Okay.
20:24Come on.
20:29You see what I'm talking about?
20:32See what I'm saying?
20:34What am I supposed to do?
20:35Hide my feelings?
20:36Lie?
20:37Come on, America.
20:38We family.
20:39You and I are family.
20:40When I say I want to kill those kids, you know what I mean.
20:43I don't have to explain.
20:45Come on.
20:46Bernie and Matt just say what you want to say but can't.
20:49But that's all right.
20:50I'm the bad guy.
20:51I'll be the bad guy.
20:53See, I just...
20:56I'm sorry.
21:04Now that's a start.
21:06That's most definitely a start.
21:15See, America, y'all thought I was all wrong and everything.
21:18Y'all...
21:20I'm sorry, too.
21:24Sorry?
21:25What did you do?
21:26You don't know?
21:29Cut the camera off.
21:31Cut the camera off.
21:32Come here!
21:33Come here!
21:40Hey, look!
21:43Hey, hey, how you doing?
21:44I can't believe it's you.
21:46Okay, okay.
21:47Grandma, Grandpa!
21:50Do they know you?
21:52Hey, Grandpa?
21:53That's Bernie Mac.
21:54He's so funny.
21:55I remember when he said,
21:56I ain't scared of your...
21:58Hey, hey, hey, hey.
21:59Stay tight with your grandparents, okay?
22:01These kids sure love you.
22:02I don't know about that, sir.
22:03Thank you very much.
22:04No, thank you.
22:05Y'all have a good one, hear?
22:06All right.
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