- 11 saat önce
Taskmaster AU S02E05
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00:00Ah!
00:04Ah!
00:09Ah!
00:13Ah!
00:18Ah!
00:19Ah!
00:20Ah!
00:20Ah!
00:21No!
00:23No!
00:37Hello and welcome to Taskmaster.
00:40My name is Tom Gleeson
00:41and as our nation drips further
00:44into a gig economy like many Australians,
00:46I have picked up a side hustle.
00:48My side hustle is entertaining you.
00:50However, unlike an Uber driver,
00:52you don't rate me out of five,
00:54I rate you. Because I am
00:56the Taskmaster.
01:00Competing this season for the
01:02dubious glory of winning the show
01:04and this dubious gold head of mine
01:06are Anne Edmonds,
01:09Jenny Tian,
01:11Josh Thomas,
01:14Lloyd Langford
01:16and Will Anderson.
01:20Last of all,
01:21it's my assistant,
01:22Lesser Tom Cashman.
01:26How are you going?
01:28I'm okay. I was going to pull you up on a
01:29technicality there that I may be Lesser Tom
01:31but I'm the main Tom Cashman.
01:33But it occurred to me, I recently got told,
01:35and this is true, that I share a name with an Irish hurler.
01:37Oh.
01:38And I looked it up on Wikipedia and this is true as well,
01:40he's actually apparently one of the greatest
01:42Irish hurlers of all time.
01:44So I think it's unfortunately inarguable
01:46that I'm also Lesser Tom Cashman.
01:49Out of the two Tom Cashmans,
01:51you're the lesser one.
01:51Well I think there's probably more than two
01:53but I'm maximum second.
01:57Okay.
01:58Alright Tom, tell us about this week's prize task.
02:00Well this week our contestants have brought
02:02the thing that would most improve
02:04a camping trip.
02:05Ooh.
02:08Okay, Lloyd you're first.
02:10I have brought along a valid key card
02:14to a nearby hotel.
02:19So I'm guessing you don't like camping.
02:22I just think as a species we've evolved beyond it.
02:27Well you remember that it's me who decides
02:30who gets what points and I love camping.
02:34This may not all go well for all five of you.
02:37But anyway, Jenny, what did you bring in?
02:39Okay, like Lloyd, I hate camping.
02:42I feel like only a psychopath enjoys camping.
02:45So what I have brought in is a hypnotist
02:51to...
02:56Right, so then he can convince you
02:58and hypnotise you into, you know, loving camping.
03:02But I already love camping.
03:03But having said that, I'd love to take a hypnotist camping.
03:06He could hypnotise me and make me imagine
03:08that I'm in an even better national park.
03:12Josh, what did you bring in?
03:14I think the best thing to go camping with
03:16would be Australian television legend
03:18Denise Drysdale.
03:20We're going camping.
03:22I've got the boat ready everything.
03:24Camping we will go.
03:26Camping we will go.
03:32Everything's better with Denise Drysdale.
03:34That's what I always say.
03:35Can you explain to Jenny who she is?
03:37I have no idea, I'm so sorry.
03:38She's an Australian television legend.
03:41She's been in a lot of TV shows.
03:42One of the TV shows she was in was
03:44my TV show, which you didn't watch.
03:47I'm finding out now.
03:49And she's just a bundle of joy.
03:51And she loves camping.
03:53She's up for things.
03:55It doesn't matter really what it is.
03:57She's up for it.
03:57That's one of the things about Denise Drysdale.
03:59A couple of wines and she is up for it.
04:02Will, what have you got?
04:04Tom, I know you love camping
04:05and of course I also love camping.
04:07Correct.
04:08And this definitely isn't the opposite of the direction
04:10I was going 30 seconds ago.
04:14Like sometimes you can't go out into the bush.
04:16So I've got you a projector of the night sky,
04:20but you need this to be played somewhere.
04:22That's the key to my house.
04:25So compared to your house,
04:27going to my house will feel like you're slumming it.
04:29Like you're in a campsite.
04:31And you'll be able to look at the stars on the roof.
04:33Okay, so you're suggesting I go camping inside your house.
04:37Yes.
04:37Yeah, maybe.
04:40Anne, what did you bring in?
04:42Yes, well I love camping.
04:45The problem with camping is there's no light, right?
04:48So from about 8 o'clock onwards there's nothing to do.
04:51To create entertainment, I bring camping an MP3 player
04:55with some funny noises on it
04:57to sort of crawl around the campsite and play
05:01like while people are trying to sleep.
05:03Just get in there.
05:04The first one is sort of a possum mating type noise.
05:08Love that.
05:12The second one's like a big cat.
05:14So I'm trying to create a bit of fear in the campsite with this one.
05:21The third one's really good though.
05:23This is probably one of my favourites.
05:24Let's have it.
05:25Get the ropes.
05:28Dig a hole.
05:33Okay, well I should allocate some points.
05:35Lloyd I'm giving one point to because there's no getting around it.
05:38That's a hotel room key.
05:40Two points go to Will because I would have to go into his house
05:43to enjoy his thing.
05:44Jenny, you've got a hypnotist but I would use the hypnotist differently.
05:47just to hypnotise me for my own entertainment while I was camping.
05:51And four points I'm giving to Ann
05:52because it would be very exciting when you're camping
05:54hearing some of those sounds.
05:55But five points goes to Josh because Denise Drysdale
05:58would be an absolute treat on a camping trip.
06:04Alright, so let's dig into our first task.
06:07Like other tasks, this one features five crazy characters.
06:10Unlike other tasks, we've also got a maximum of 160.
06:25Oh, finally the skinny dip challenge.
06:29Interesting.
06:30No Tom.
06:31I can't see him.
06:32I can't see a task though.
06:35Ooh, geese.
06:37Oh, there's a phone.
06:38Old school.
06:43Find Tom.
06:44Find Tom.
06:45You may text Tom to help you find him,
06:47but Tom can only reply to your text with false information.
06:50You are only permitted to travel whilst waiting for a text back.
06:55Viewers characters texted before finding Tom wins.
06:57Your time starts now.
07:00Unlock.
07:02Press this.
07:03What did Jenny do when you gave her this phone?
07:05She doesn't know how to use this.
07:06I don't know if I know how to use one of these.
07:09Okay.
07:13So it's pretty straightforward really.
07:14Who's first?
07:15Just like the games on that old phone,
07:17one of them's a snake and the other one's a snake too.
07:20It's Jenny and Lloyd.
07:22Ooh, okay.
07:23It's on.
07:24Unlock.
07:25Contacts.
07:26Ooh, Taskmaster Assistant.
07:28I have a feeling he's indoors.
07:30Otherwise it would be too easy to spot him right now.
07:33Okay.
07:34You win Sid.
07:35Sent successfully.
07:37Well done Jenny.
07:38And now we wait.
07:42It's kind of like waiting for a text from like a guy you really like,
07:47but then he kind of like ghosts you.
07:49That's what this feels like.
07:51No, I'm out in the open air.
07:53Okay.
07:54So he is inside.
07:56Oh wait.
07:57You are only permitted to travel whilst wasting for a text back.
08:01Okay.
08:02Upstairs.
08:03Sent successfully.
08:04Alright.
08:08Yeah.
08:10So he's downstairs.
08:11I wonder if he'll understand me if I don't send a question mark.
08:14Okay, I'm gonna risk it.
08:16Okay.
08:17Tom!
08:19Oh.
08:20He could be in the shed or in the caravan.
08:24Vehicle.
08:25What?
08:29No, I'm not in a vehicle.
08:31He is in a vehicle.
08:32Witch.
08:37I'm showering.
08:39Does that mean he's taking a shit?
08:41I'm just gonna text Clue.
08:42I don't know where else he could be.
08:46That is not helpful.
08:50Is there any vehicles over where the dock is?
08:56So I sent a message.
08:58Where aren't you?
09:12Where's it going?
09:13Where are you?
09:15Is he under the boat?
09:18Oh my God.
09:20Oh.
09:22Hey Tom.
09:23You just got a message.
09:25I don't need to read it.
09:26Oh, here you are.
09:27Thanks Jenny.
09:28Thanks Tom.
09:29See ya.
09:29See you.
09:31Nobody is going to beat that.
09:41So Jenny, Lester Tom said that he was showering and you were like, what's the opposite of
09:46that?
09:46Taking a shit.
09:47Yeah.
09:48So do you live in a binary world where you're either showering or shitting?
09:53It's like one or the other.
09:54Well, I was just thinking shower clean, shit dirty, you know.
09:57No.
09:58So if he said I was shitting, you'd be like, oh, he's in the shower.
10:01Honestly, yeah, probably.
10:03And I'm pretty sure, I'm pretty sure I checked like every toilet for Tom as well at the time.
10:09Now Lloyd, you seem to pretty much go straight to the boat and you found him.
10:12What was the reasoning there?
10:13I've been hurt by you in the past.
10:16Nah.
10:17Yeah, I don't know.
10:18I just, it just came to me.
10:19It hit me.
10:20I was like, he's definitely under the board.
10:22Okay.
10:22I didn't hear any noises or anything.
10:24I just.
10:24Yeah, did you like, was your phone pinging or something like that?
10:26Oh, I was on silent.
10:27You sure?
10:28I don't think I've ever been more sure that my phone was on silent than hiding 10 metres
10:33away from people that are searching for me.
10:35Alright.
10:36What are the scores so far?
10:37So Jenny was relatively economical with her texts.
10:40She has a total of 41 characters.
10:42Lloyd sent one text, where aren't you?
10:45With correct spelling and punctuation, a total of 17 characters.
10:51Speaking of phones, now's a great time to look at yours while ignoring the loved ones who
10:56live in your house.
10:56Because we're taking a break.
10:57See you soon with more Tom Hunting and more Taskmaster!
11:09Welcome back to Taskmaster Australia.
11:12Lesser time.
11:12Catch the people up.
11:13Our contestants are trying to find me by texting me and they're only allowed to move while
11:17they're waiting for a text back.
11:18Who have you got for us next?
11:19Thankfully, they've been famous for ages, so they're used to having tantrums at reception.
11:23It's Will and Josh.
11:25It would help if I wasn't an old man and knew how to use a phone.
11:29So if I say outside, then I'll find out if he's in the house.
11:34Sent successfully.
11:36Are you in house?
11:40Oh, one new message.
11:42I am bird watching.
11:44Where are you?
11:46Hopefully I'm not going further away from him.
11:48I'm having a shower.
11:49He's just going to tell me junk the whole time.
11:52I'll just say where.
11:53Send run.
11:58It says in the kitchen.
11:59Just saying K.
12:02Having a shower?
12:03Okay.
12:04Are you wet?
12:06I mean, that one just amused me, really.
12:08Oh, so wet.
12:16If he's only going to give me false information, there's no point sending any characters.
12:22Okay.
12:22There's a blank text.
12:23I can just run.
12:24I'm just going to give him a little compliment.
12:27You know what that means?
12:28He does appreciate the compliment.
12:30We're getting at least a little vibe going here.
12:33I mean, it is going to annoy me if I go back to where I was and Tom is there.
12:37It just seems like the kind of thing that he'd just be like where we started.
12:43You know, it's weird, but I miss him.
12:49When you can't work it out, you always go back to the beginning.
12:52It's going to be sad if I just have to repeat everything that I just did.
12:56If nothing else, it's a very nice stroll.
13:00Okay, I send an MMS.
13:02An MMS is not a character!
13:05Capture.
13:05Send.
13:07What a glorious day to be here.
13:11Are you up?
13:13Or just send him a little are you up sex just to give him a little buzz.
13:18If I go back there again and he's not down there again, I may jump in the light.
13:22MMS.
13:23Send.
13:26That is where he is.
13:27That's what that means.
13:31All right.
13:32I'm in something that's the right way up.
13:36Shit.
13:39I bloody knew it!
13:42Hi, Josh.
13:44Tom, they don't pay you enough.
13:46Get out from under the boat.
13:47That's so stupid.
13:49I'll see you next time.
13:51Thanks, Josh.
13:56Josh, did you put Lesser Tom back under the boat?
13:59Out of everyone, you were the only one that didn't help him out.
14:02I can only assume that you like it in there.
14:05Otherwise, why would you go in there?
14:07You're not wrong.
14:09Now, you started sending pictures.
14:11Yes, an MMS.
14:12So the whole idea was you were thinking that's not a character.
14:15An MMS is not a character.
14:16That's right.
14:16Some people say a picture is a thousand words.
14:22Yes, but they'd ever say an MMS is 10,000 characters.
14:28All right.
14:28Okay.
14:29So, Will, were you like Lloyd?
14:30You just decided that it was sort of going to be annoying if he was under the boat.
14:33When did it twig for you?
14:34I think all of us have had the experience of one of the tasks that absolutely broke us during this
14:39experience and this was mine.
14:41I got home after this day and my phone told me I'd done a record amount of steps.
14:49There was a point where, you know when like the crew were even looking at you like, stop.
14:55The only hope you have of not coming last in this is that someone else has sent a bunch of
14:59pictures.
15:04Will sent a total of 140 characters.
15:07And what about for Josh?
15:08Well, Josh sent 21 characters before the MMS strategy was implemented.
15:12Okay.
15:13I just would like to know if the audience thinks that a picture is literally worth a thousand words.
15:20Well, can we confirm with you Taskmaster whether we're accepting the MMS strategy?
15:24Oh, I was just joking. I forgot I'd said it to be honest.
15:28I was just saying it to shit you and it's just funny to see you still holding on to it.
15:33Because you go on the show and you think, oh, sometimes I'm going to do a funny little trick on
15:37Taskmaster and that's the only one I had all season.
15:41Well, it's a small thing.
15:45Alright, who's left Tom Cashman?
15:47She's SMS herself. Seriously mental sometimes. It's Anne Edmonds.
15:55Hello.
15:57Hello.
15:58Where are you?
16:00Where are you?
16:01I'm just about to text you but I just thought I'd give that a go first.
16:04Oh, nice.
16:05You should yell out. You should yell something. You should yell my name.
16:08You want me to yell your name?
16:09Yeah.
16:10What will you do for me?
16:12I will give you a head massage.
16:17Okay.
16:19Here goes.
16:21Anne!
16:23You should yell it again if you want two head massages.
16:27Anne!
16:28You should yell it again.
16:30I don't think I'm interested in a third head massage, thank you.
16:33Really?
16:35What's your worst memory of high school?
16:37I got in trouble for throwing sand up in the air in the classroom.
16:40I got in trouble for throwing sand up in the air?
16:42I know.
16:43You were just trying to express yourself.
16:45Sorry about that.
16:46Oh, thank you.
16:47What's the worst thing that happened to you in high school?
16:49I climbed up on the roof and smoked a cigarette.
16:52Oh, that sounds fun though.
16:53Yeah, it was fun, but I got in big trouble.
16:55I know.
16:57What's the happiest moment of your life?
16:58Having my baby.
16:59I mean, obviously.
17:00You know, like, that's the best moment of my life.
17:02You think, isn't it?
17:03When I was born.
17:04It's 100% the best moment of my life.
17:06Wow.
17:06I think it's time for that head massage.
17:09What do you reckon?
17:10Two head massages.
17:11Two head massages.
17:12Sorry.
17:12Yeah.
17:14Good to see you.
17:17Thanks.
17:17Yeah.
17:18I'll give you those head massages.
17:19I mean, not really gonna.
17:22Oh.
17:24What?
17:25Thanks, Anne.
17:26See you, Tom.
17:30Very clever tactic.
17:31Was there anything that said that you're not allowed to ring?
17:34Nothing about ringing in the task.
17:35Okay, all right.
17:36So, yeah.
17:36So, you made a call, and that worked pretty well.
17:39She used zero characters, but we did something that involves two characters.
17:43A D and M.
17:44Yeah, we had a nice chat.
17:45Yeah, we got to know each other.
17:46It was lovely.
17:47Lying next to the boat.
17:50It's okay to feel angry towards me, because I'm smart.
17:52If the contestant is only able to travel...
17:56...whilst waiting for a reply to a text message,
17:59and a text message is never sent,
18:01then presumably the contestant can never travel.
18:04Oh!
18:04Yes!
18:06The betrayal!
18:07Oh!
18:08Thanks.
18:09You're looking at divorce, mate.
18:10It's good when the...
18:11Yeah.
18:11The moment of divorce is recorded.
18:15I mean, they're right.
18:17Fine, Tom.
18:17You are only permitted to travel whilst waiting for a text back.
18:20But I never sent in...
18:22While waiting for a text...
18:23Back.
18:24Hmm.
18:24What do you think, audience?
18:28Oh, you know what?
18:30Let's see what the audience thinks, um, by...
18:32Maybe...
18:33Should we watch it again?
18:33Yeah, well, the audience can watch the footage and decide.
18:35You're only permitted to travel whilst waiting for a text back.
18:40Your time.
18:42Starts now.
18:48Hmm.
18:51Oh.
18:52It's so weird when Tom's not here to ask questions.
18:55I don't know whether I'm allowed to move.
19:00You said, I don't know if I'm allowed to move.
19:03So, I agree.
19:03Audience, what do you think?
19:05Oh, no.
19:07Yes, this lady wants to weigh in.
19:10Yes, Mum?
19:11You didn't send a text so you didn't have to wait for one to come back.
19:14Correct.
19:14Oh, hang on.
19:17We're not just going to consult a random audience member.
19:21Can I say, there is a line, it was in very small print, it says,
19:24find one lady who agrees with you.
19:31Always read the back of the task.
19:33So, just confirming, that's a disqualification for Anne.
19:36That's right, Anne moved.
19:37It's not even controversial!
19:39It is!
19:40She didn't follow what was supposed to be done in the task.
19:42There was no text to respond to!
19:44So, that's zero points for Anne as a DQ,
19:46two points for Will with 140 characters.
19:48Three for Jenny with 41 characters,
19:50four for Josh with 21 characters,
19:51but the winner of the task with five points
19:53and only 17 characters, it's Lloyd Langford!
19:59So, the question we all want to ask is,
20:01Lloyd, was it worth it?
20:04Our poor daughter's going to have to live between different households.
20:08And I won't move unless I'm waiting for you to text me back.
20:13There we go.
20:14See?
20:16Follows the rules!
20:18Okay, what does that do for our scoreboard for the episode?
20:21Well, if this was the 1980 Olympic medal board,
20:24Josh would be the Soviet Union because he's out in front with nine points!
20:27What?
20:28Come on!
20:29Wow!
20:31Now, queue up another task, Lesser Tom.
20:33Okay, but I'm not going to allude to any aspect of it in the intro.
20:36I don't want to give anything away.
20:50Nice jacket.
20:52Hey, Terrapin.
20:54Hi, Lloyd.
20:54Cool jacket.
20:56Really nice.
20:57You're looking cool, man.
20:59I like that.
21:00Interesting jacket.
21:02You think?
21:04Yeah.
21:08Don't do it.
21:09Don't do it.
21:10Don't do it.
21:11Last person to do it wins.
21:14Your time started when you entered the lab.
21:18Do what?
21:19That's a good question.
21:21And I reckon it was mentioning your jacket.
21:24You think?
21:24Yeah.
21:29Yeah, this is pure Taskmaster, I feel.
21:31It really messes with their heads and probably damaging for their mental health,
21:35which makes me absolutely love this task.
21:38What was on the table?
21:39On the table there was a disco ball, a turnip, a wind-up toy, a cryptex,
21:44as made famous by the Da Vinci Code, and a steering wheel, as made famous by cars.
21:50Let's have a look who's first.
21:51This is going to be difficult for them.
21:53One has do in his first name, the other has it in her last.
21:56It's Lloyd and Jenny.
21:57If it was mentioned in your jacket, would you blow the whistle and that would be the end of the
22:01task?
22:02That's a good question.
22:03I feel like maybe I haven't done it.
22:07I could just stand around and do nothing.
22:10I mean, that would mean that I don't do whatever it is.
22:14Unless that was it.
22:15I don't think it would be nothing.
22:17There'd be certain things I could rule out that I could do that I don't think would be the thing
22:22that you're not supposed to do.
22:24Crawling through the space underneath the table.
22:31Do you think that was it?
22:32Definitely not.
22:33Still here, aren't I?
22:34It's got to be something like touching one of these or like turning one of these on or off.
22:41Because they're all very fiddly, fidgety things.
22:44They're things that you want to touch.
22:49You are allowed to knock the sweet or the turnip off the table.
22:52Is it to take your jacket off?
22:55Like someone might be tempted to wear your jacket, like that could be it.
22:58Do you want to wear my jacket?
22:59No, I'm not going to do anything.
23:01Oh, okay.
23:01I'll go pick it up.
23:11Thanks, Lloyd.
23:22How was I meant to know that?
23:23You weren't.
23:24Oh, man.
23:25Why were you wearing the jacket?
23:27I think I look cool.
23:28All right, bye.
23:30See you, Jenny.
23:31I don't know what the trigger was.
23:34Knocking the sweet off the table was the beginning of the end, like a lot of great men in history.
23:40Thanks, Lloyd.
23:48Lloyd, I feel like you left not knowing what the task was.
23:52I have been wondering for four months what I did.
23:56I didn't see the sign, unlike Ace of Base.
24:02I'll explain that later.
24:03Yeah, I was going to go, what's that?
24:05All right, well, let's see how long you were there for.
24:07Lloyd turned around after eight minutes and 17 seconds.
24:12So what was going on in your head, Jenny, during that task?
24:14What were you thinking?
24:15Well, the task was like, do the thing, so I'm just going to do nothing at all.
24:19Yeah.
24:19But I didn't really count on me getting so bored during that time.
24:25So then I just had to look around and I feel like this is how I find out I have
24:29ADHD.
24:33So how long did it take?
24:36How long did it take Jenny to get bored?
24:38Jenny did it after two minutes and 15 minutes.
24:45That felt like forever for you, didn't it?
24:47Yeah, it really, it was so long and I was so bored and he was just wearing a stupid jacket
24:53and I...
24:55Can I explain the jacket, other than the fact that I thought it looked cool?
24:58The Crypt X, inside the Crypt X, on the table, there was a piece of paper that explained that doing
25:03it was turning around.
25:04And the code to the Crypt X was the word jacket.
25:09Ah, okay.
25:11Well, we're going to watch more people try not to turn around very soon.
25:17It's like the opposite of the voice.
25:19As for you at home, don't turn around either.
25:21The TV is this way.
25:23Stay looking at it for a few minutes while we take a break.
25:25See you soon.
25:35Welcome back to Taskmaster where five comedians are trying their best to win one night in a tent with a
25:40professional hypnotist.
25:42Tom Cashman?
25:43How are they going about it?
25:44Our contestants are trying their best not to do it.
25:47Little do they know that doing it equals turning around.
25:49Lloyd is the one to beat at the moment, taking just over eight minutes.
25:53Alright, who's next?
25:54They're on this show to turn their careers around.
25:56Will they mess that up by turning around?
25:58Here's Will and Josh.
26:01What are you thinking?
26:06Hello?
26:10I can see a consistent, maybe, between these things.
26:14So I don't want to turn around, is what I think.
26:16Why do you think that?
26:17Because they're all things that you would turn, and one's a turnip.
26:23You okay?
26:27It's combining some of my favourite things.
26:29Stillness and not doing anything.
26:31Okay.
26:33I can't tell if you're sad or happy here.
26:36It's kind of like a weird combo of both.
26:40I actually did start crying.
26:42Why are you crying?
26:43It just was painful.
26:45How boring it was.
26:46Okay.
26:47I mean, I guess I don't even have to keep talking.
26:49I could just be standing here in silence.
26:51But that would be weird, wouldn't it, though?
26:55How long would Will have to sit up last?
26:58Do you like sports?
27:00What's your favourite food?
27:02Did you know that I know every second letter of the alphabet, but only one way?
27:05I think as you get older, maybe you have less friends.
27:07How do you feel about the fact that in Australia we have so many different time zones?
27:11You've got, I will say, quite strong eyebrows.
27:22Does that feel nice?
27:23It feels really good.
27:25I've asked you a lot of questions.
27:26Is there anything you would like to ask me?
27:28Would it be okay if I took off this extremely hot jacket?
27:31Yes.
27:35Uh, Josh?
27:37Yes?
27:37It's lunchtime in about five minutes.
27:40Which means that the crew, legally speaking, need to be provided lunch.
27:44Okay.
27:46Surely nobody else has got the ridiculous patience for this that I have had to not do this.
27:51Right?
27:55Are you going to have some?
27:56I'm not going to have some.
27:58It's not the thing.
27:59It would be very cruel if that was the thing.
28:02Have you ever watched this show?
28:05I'm not going to continue to do this for much longer.
28:07But if I do stop, and somebody else has done it for longer,
28:11I don't know how I'm going to feel about that time.
28:14Long to roll hand is going to stay.
28:28And you definitely tell me if I've done the thing.
28:37I didn't turn around for a whole hour.
28:45So Josh, you saw what it was. You definitely saw the sign just at the end.
28:49Yes, I saw the sign and it said, do not turn around.
28:51I think I said to you at one point, I think Will probably did two hours.
28:55And I said, I think I can do that.
28:56And you said, please don't.
28:59I did start crying.
29:02I started crying at the nine minute mark.
29:05I just started weeping.
29:07Then I thought, I wouldn't be good in the army.
29:11That's when you realised?
29:13Yeah.
29:14So Will, I feel like you were kind of the opposite.
29:17You realised that you shouldn't turn around.
29:18Were you 100% on that?
29:20I was pretty confident.
29:21You were pretty confident?
29:21It was, don't turn around.
29:23So then I had to make the calculation of how long do I think that everybody else will last in
29:28this game.
29:28Because I took the opposite approach to Josh's quiet time.
29:31Where I decided, well, you know what, if I'm here, I might as well keep talking constantly.
29:37Will essentially did a festival show at me.
29:41He touched on 47 different topics, including sports, stand-up comedy, Tom Cruise, time zones in Australia,
29:48about minions and the pros and cons of chocolate mousse.
29:52At the end of your time, you did quite a sincere and lovely thank you to the crew.
30:00Said goodbye and then walked off.
30:06OK, well, it's Josh versus Will at the moment.
30:08I think we need to hear the scores.
30:10Will Anderson's festival show lasted 54 minutes and 14 seconds.
30:14Oh my gosh.
30:15Josh's silence lasted one hour, five minutes and four seconds.
30:25OK, anyone left?
30:27Um, look, can I just say something at this point?
30:31What's it going to be?
30:32No, no, I've just got a fun idea.
30:34Let's not watch mine.
30:37Like, just, let's do something else.
30:40Like, I could, I'll do any dance you want.
30:43Or, like, please, let's not watch mine.
30:48Please!
30:50I've had enough humiliation.
30:52To be fair, we often leave one to go because it can be a moment of great triumph.
30:57Yeah.
30:58You never know.
31:00Singled out for the second time in one episode, it's none other than Ann Edmund.
31:05Don't do it.
31:07OK.
31:08I won't.
31:10OK.
31:16Thanks, Ann.
31:24So, I have the feeling that you thought you nailed it.
31:27No.
31:28All I saw was don't do it after doing a lot of things, like running around in the rain and
31:32crying and whatever.
31:35So I just saw it out.
31:37I just was like, oh, don't do it.
31:39OK, I won't.
31:40And I left.
31:42Ann did it in 33 seconds.
31:48Which leaves Ann with one point, Jenny with two, Lloyd with three, Will with four.
31:52But taking home the task, it's Josh Thomas with five points.
31:55You got the job for me.
31:58OK, Lisa, Tom, you got another task queued up?
32:01I sure do.
32:01Don't you remember?
32:02It's all part of a discrete plan we made with directors, producers, camera operators, audio technicians,
32:07and, of course, our contestants.
32:24Hello.
32:25Hello.
32:26Hi, Josh.
32:26Yeah, do it, my friend.
32:29Here we go, Lloyd.
32:32Invent and promote an original conspiracy theory.
32:35Most persuasive and conspiratorial theory wins.
32:38You have 40 minutes.
32:39Your time starts now.
32:41Oh, this is fun.
32:43What are conspiracy theories?
32:44The world is flat.
32:45It's the Illuminati.
32:46Who controls the currency in the world?
32:49The mint.
32:49The mint.
32:50Could we have a mint-related conspiracy?
32:52I went there on excursion when I was in year six.
32:55And guess how much a one dollar coin was?
32:57One dollar?
32:58Two dollars.
32:58What?
32:59I reckon they're putting hormones in the money.
33:03That make us, like, really horny.
33:04No.
33:05Oh, OK.
33:06All right.
33:06What about something about Tom Gleeson who we could call him and, like, make him admit
33:12to something?
33:13Call him now and try and find a clip of him that sounds gay?
33:23We've got the teams back, of course, the discount wiggles and the premium economy hoolidoolies.
33:28Why do I get the feeling that you visiting the mint was the most exciting thing you did as a
33:32child?
33:33Because it was.
33:35There's only one thing I want to watch more than Josh and Anne's conspiracy video,
33:39and that's literally anything.
33:40So let's put in some ads for a few minutes just to delay the inevitable.
33:44See you soon.
33:55Welcome back to Taskmaster where our comedians are spreading conspiracy theories to win prizes.
34:01So whose conspiracy do we have first?
34:03The first team trying to manipulate society to meet their needs.
34:06It's the discount wiggles.
34:10You won't believe the reason why you're horny all the time.
34:13We're going to explain it to you today on Follow the Money, because the money is what's making you horny
34:20in the first place.
34:21We have a whistleblower here on the show. Can you tell us what's been going on?
34:25I discovered that the mint, in coordination with the various world governments, are adding hormones...
34:35What?
34:36...to our money in order to get us hornier...
34:40What?
34:41...more sexually active.
34:43They want to increase the population so they can still make money and we can still spend money.
34:51How do they add the hormones to the money?
34:54Well, I'm glad you've asked me that.
34:56Yeah.
34:56Because I managed to smuggle out some of the hormones...
35:00The substance!
35:01That's not it.
35:02That is it. I accidentally spilled a drop on myself today.
35:06Yes.
35:07It was like trying to land a tuna.
35:09It was flapping around and I couldn't subdue it.
35:13I can't believe it.
35:14That's incredible.
35:15This is incredible.
35:15I think we actually have to get to the next guest.
35:17Yeah.
35:17We have Tom Cashman.
35:19It's lovely to have you here.
35:20Tell us the story about when you, as a child, went and visited the Australian Mint.
35:24When I was on an excursion in year six.
35:27How old?
35:28How old were you?
35:28I was 12 years old at that time.
35:30Uh-huh.
35:30So, yeah.
35:30Did you touch some money?
35:31Yeah, we touched some money and stuff like that.
35:33And then, in your teenage years, would you say that you were more horny?
35:39Yeah, so I suppose in the couple of years after I visited the Mint, I became much more horny.
35:43Oh, my God. It all matches up.
35:46Exponential.
35:46Exponential, I would describe.
35:47Is that right?
35:48Touchless.
35:49Do we need any more evidence than that?
35:50It all matches up.
35:52We've exposed the truth.
35:53I mean, thank you so much for being here on the show.
35:56Look, we like to pay our guests.
35:57I mean, we don't like to let people come on.
35:59So, there you go, that's for you.
36:00Of course, there you go.
36:01Oh, thank you.
36:02That's for you.
36:03Yeah, yeah.
36:03You just, you enjoy that.
36:05You just take that with you.
36:06So, look.
36:07Oh, my gosh.
36:08What's happening?
36:09Whoa.
36:10Oh, no!
36:11Oh, no!
36:12Oh, no!
36:13Oh, no!
36:14Oh, no!
36:14What's happening?
36:16Anyway, join us again next week on Follow the Money.
36:19I've been Willie Anderson.
36:20I've been Jenny Tian.
36:22See you next time.
36:23Willie Horny.
36:29Yeah, the discount wiggles there.
36:31Doing a great job.
36:33I must say, Will, you seem very at home there hosting a dodgy podcast.
36:37Podcasts are the home of conspiracy theories.
36:39I mean, honestly, we recorded a lot of that podcast.
36:43There was a lot more to it, yeah.
36:45Yeah.
36:45And also very different to your podcast, Will.
36:47You paid the guests.
36:49Oh.
36:53Don't make fun of TV's beloved Will Anderson.
36:57But I think the real star, the real star of that podcast was Tom Cashman's portrayal of horniness.
37:09I've got to say that I'm starting to work out why Tom's single.
37:12Like, if you can imagine him on dates in restaurants.
37:14As soon as he gets a vibe on someone, he's, oh.
37:19So how did you feel Jenny having to witness that up close?
37:22Did you feel like you were in an unsafe workplace?
37:25Obviously, you know, we were talking about the podcast before and then we kind of, I could anticipate the effect
37:31of the money, but I didn't know he'd go that far.
37:35I just did what I was told.
37:38When you touch the money, get really horny.
37:43I was worried that Lloyd was going to land a second tuner.
37:47Because you touched the money as well.
37:49I know, but I had all of the protective gear on, which was kind of fortunate in terms of his
37:55horniness.
37:56I suppose we should watch another one.
37:58It's what I've been waiting for.
37:59Here's Josh and Anne.
38:03Hello.
38:04Hi, hey, Tom.
38:05Hi, how are you?
38:05I'm well.
38:06How are you, Josh?
38:10I have some really specific questions for you to answer.
38:14What's the capital of Utah?
38:19So, you want me to answer some questions because this is part of the task, I'm guessing.
38:24What if I don't answer it?
38:27Tom, it's Anne Edmonds.
38:28How are you?
38:28Nice to hear from you.
38:30Oh, okay.
38:31I see what's going on.
38:32Yeah.
38:33I'm guessing you're a teen and you need me to do a favour.
38:36Okay.
38:36Well, I'm going to tell you that the capital of Utah is Salt Lake City.
38:42Okay.
38:42Does that help you?
38:43Yes.
38:44Can you listen?
38:45Can you just listen to gay things?
38:47I have to listen to gay things?
38:49Yeah.
38:50Are you trying to reveal that I'm homophobic?
38:52That's an industry secret.
38:55Let me keep that on the download.
38:57I actually think we've done it and I think we could go.
39:00Bye.
39:00Bye.
39:01He said, are you trying to reveal that I'm homophobic because that's an industry secret?
39:05We just cut out phobic.
39:07Yes.
39:09He walked right into our trap.
39:11Okay.
39:14Today on the News Truth we look at one of Australia's leading white male straight comedians, Tom Gleeson.
39:22He hosts every show in Australia based on his white straight male status.
39:26But leading gay comedian Josh Thomas is here to reveal that perhaps that isn't the case.
39:32Josh.
39:32Yes, I have some big news today about Tom Gleeson.
39:35I've got a tape to play for you.
39:37Okay.
39:37Yes.
39:38It's going to reveal a lot about his secret life.
39:40This is actually groundbreaking stuff.
39:42Let's throw to the audio and have a listen to what Josh Thomas discovered only yesterday.
39:48Hey, Tom.
39:48Hi.
39:49Yeah.
39:49I was just watching my favourite Housewives.
39:51Salt Lake City.
39:52Oh, my God.
39:52Of course.
39:53Do you love Salt Lake City?
39:54Yeah, yeah.
39:55I just was going to check that you'll be nice to be on the show, yeah?
39:58Yeah, I was just going to work for me.
40:00Pardon?
40:00You do a favour for me.
40:02What?
40:02Tom?
40:03Paperware?
40:04Down low.
40:05Wait.
40:05Tom, are you flirting with me?
40:08Yeah, yeah.
40:08No, it's actually a little uncomfortable.
40:10You want me?
40:11You're so bad, Josh.
40:12I'm gay.
40:12I'm gay.
40:13I'm gay.
40:14Tom, are you, um...
40:16Chill, Josh.
40:17Down low.
40:18It was really good.
40:19We just returned to the way I called.
40:20I was just going to talk about the show.
40:22Are you trying to reveal that I'm gay?
40:24Because I'm gay.
40:25That's the industry secret that I'm gay.
40:27Seems pretty gay.
40:29It does seem...
40:30Yeah.
40:30You've got to admit, it does seem pretty gay.
40:32I'm no gay expert, but that was gay.
40:34That was gay.
40:35That was gay.
40:36Thank you so much, Josh Thomas, and I look forward to you hosting Hard Quiz.
40:40Good night.
40:48We got him!
40:51That's the chaos we've come to expect from the premium economy hoolie-doolies, am I right?
40:57I feel like this doesn't need to be pointed out, but when I said that I was homophobic, I was
41:01joking.
41:03But the weird part for me is, you thought what would be more controversial is to change it to the
41:09fact that I'm actually gay.
41:12If you revealed that I was homophobic, don't you think that story would travel further?
41:16No.
41:19We circled around on a few ideas, but Josh just kept coming back to the, over and over again, the
41:24fact that you're gay.
41:26Ann was quite resistant to the idea.
41:29Yeah, she was worried that it would look like me and you were homophobe.
41:33Yeah.
41:33Well, not me, you.
41:34Yes.
41:36Well, I'm just happy that we've upped the diversity of this program anyway.
41:39Shut up, Poofta!
41:45Anyway, that was very good.
41:46It's some of the best journalism I've seen on Channel 10, to be fair.
41:50We should allocate some points, I think.
41:53So it's most persuasive and conspiratorial theory wins.
41:56I really enjoyed the conspiracy from the Discount Wiggles, but it's hard to go past a story that was about
42:01me.
42:03So I'm going to go for the hoolie-doolies as winners there.
42:07I'm going to allocate the points because they're very close in quality, so I want to go 5-5-4
42:11-4-4.
42:11Okay.
42:14If you want to see more of me, gay icon, Tom Gleeson, then stick around.
42:19We've got a live task and a big prize-giving coming up when Taskmaster returns.
42:33Welcome back to Taskmaster.
42:35Who will win a camping trip with Denise Drysdale?
42:39Lesser Tom, catch us up.
42:40Who's winning the episode so far?
42:43Well, it's no conspiracy.
42:44He's on top of the world.
42:45Josh Thomas is in the lead!
42:50OK, all that's left is the live task, so let's do that.
42:53Get up on stage, everyone!
42:58Right, what's going on here, Tommy C?
43:05Reveal the thing on your drum that doesn't make a sound and make the sound it should make.
43:12Least like the sound it should make will be eliminated.
43:16Last person standing wins.
43:19Oh, no.
43:21Jenny, please.
43:23Ooh!
43:24Ooh!
43:24A sloth.
43:29Ooh...
43:30Ooh...
43:32Ooh...
43:34Oi...
43:36Oyster.
43:39Yer...
43:40Yer...
43:40Yer...
43:42Yer...
43:43Yer, yer...
43:43Yer...
43:44Yer...
43:44Yer...
43:47Yer...
43:49And...
43:50Worms.
43:59Will, Giraffe, Josh, Snail,
44:10Jessica, Johnny!
44:23Taskmaster, please select someone to be eliminated.
44:26I'm gonna go, I think the worst was Jenny with the sloth.
44:29Jenny is eliminated.
44:31Josh.
44:33Mime.
44:44It's annoying, isn't it, mime?
44:47Will.
44:49Ballerina.
44:50Brr-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r
44:55-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r.
44:58And the Taskmaster Trophy.
45:04I got my bit of a head.
45:12Lloyd.
45:14A 45-year-old accountant who's taken a vow of silence.
45:24I wish I'd chosen a different life.
45:30Taskmaster, please choose which contestant should be eliminated.
45:33I feel it has to be Lloyd.
45:35Lloyd has been eliminated.
45:37Well done, Lloyd.
45:39Will.
45:40The Mona Lisa.
45:42No!
45:45Why are you looking at me?
45:47Yay!
45:50Josh.
45:52The Last Supper.
45:53Oh, I feel like tomorrow's going to be a really good day.
45:58Anne.
46:00American Gothic.
46:01Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
46:04How you going, man?
46:10Well, I think the worst was Will.
46:12What?
46:12Well, I feel like it kind of contained a racial stereotype.
46:15Will has been eliminated.
46:18You're the dream team.
46:20Josh and Anne.
46:21Anne.
46:23Sunset.
46:31Josh.
46:32I like that a lot, which is a shame for me.
46:36Sunrise.
46:46All right, and the winner is drum roll, please.
46:50I'm just, no.
46:52We're doing it after the ad break.
46:53See you back down here soon.
47:04Welcome back to Taskmaster, where we just enjoyed an array of exciting new noises.
47:09But who will win a prize pack, which includes Anne Edmonds making more noises?
47:15So would you like to hear it again?
47:17Yes.
47:17Well, we're down to Anne and Josh, aren't we?
47:19That's right.
47:20Okay.
47:20So Anne was sunset, and Josh was sunrise.
47:23Let's hear Anne's sunset.
47:30And Josh's sunrise.
47:38Well, it's a pretty easy decision, because it was the same idea done worse, wasn't it?
47:43So Anne's the winner.
47:44Okay.
47:45Finally.
47:46So what are the scores for the live task?
47:48Jenny only gets one point for that live task.
47:50Lloyd with two.
47:51Will three.
47:51Josh with four.
47:52But Anne takes it home with five points.
47:56All right.
47:57And what does that mean for the episode?
47:59Well, it's not only the best score of the night.
48:02It's the best individual performance of the season for an episode.
48:06Top of the table, it's Josh Thomas.
48:10All right.
48:12Josh wins the camping bounty.
48:14Head to the stage, take your items, and enjoy the vastly improved camping trip.
48:20All right, Lesser Tom, halfway through the season, what's the ladder looking like?
48:24Well, Will is in the lead with 82 points, but the real story here is the huge comeback
48:28from Josh, who had the worst start in Taskmaster Australia history, and is now still last,
48:34but only one behind Jenny with 68 points.
48:36I'm particularly thrilled that 68 is one off my favourite number.
48:3967.
48:40So what have we learned?
48:41I was taught that apparently I'm gay by an incredibly reputable media outlet, and Anne,
48:47well, Anne taught us all that it's just not easy being Anne.
48:51I'm asking you glory one more time, Josh.
48:53Everyone else, see you next week.
49:10If I had a little task bell, I would ring it.
49:17Everyone here is a nerd!
49:19Might be having some sort of episode.
49:21I've never seen someone work so hard for such a bad result.
49:24I actually might need to talk to one of the producers.
49:26What do you want to spend the world on the weather?
49:27People sh Orbish.
49:27I'll see you next week.
49:27Hi.
49:28Hello.
49:28Apart from what you like and go with!
49:28Good descriptions!
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