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00:01But you two people know deep down how you feel about each other, how you care about each other, and
00:09how much you love each other.
00:21Well, Marie, I don't know what I was thinking coming over here, because this past month of you not talking
00:28to me has been the best month of my life!
00:49Oh, man, I love a pickle. Juicy. You know what's great about a pickle? It's like a food and a
01:01drink.
01:15This is a beautiful day, isn't it? It's crisp. You know, I really never knew what people meant when they
01:23said it was a crisp day, but today, I get it.
01:28Where'd you get that shirt? Big, tall, and Samoan?
01:36What are you doing?
01:38Oh, wait. What are you doing?
01:40I hug you. Surprised? That's exactly why I hug you. Oh, there's a new Robert in town.
01:48Well, he still has that old Robert smell.
01:53So, what's going on, Robert?
01:54Ah, I'm just happy. I got a new outlook on life.
01:58Hey, have you ever heard about Inner Path?
02:02No, what's that?
02:03Oh, I'm glad you asked.
02:05It's a group with a great philosophy about life and how to live it.
02:09I've been to a couple meetings already. Gerard got me into it.
02:13Gerard? Isn't he like a... an idiot?
02:20I used to think so.
02:23But that was my baggage I was making him carry.
02:36So, is this like a self-help group or something?
02:38Oh, no, no, no. It's much more.
02:40You see, Inner Path teaches us that we all have the same emotional doors.
02:44And the trick is recognizing which doors to bolt shut and which ones to throw open.
03:05Robert, sit down.
03:09Listen, have these people asked you for money?
03:11No, no, no, no.
03:13I gave them some because I wanted to.
03:15Come on. How are you doing?
03:18It's like a scam or something.
03:21Happiness is not a scam, Raymond.
03:24Hey, I'll tell you what. Why don't you come to a meeting with me?
03:27You could learn a thing or two.
03:28Yeah, all right. What are you, nuts? No.
03:30Uh, they said I would encounter naysay negativity.
03:34But you know what Inner Path taught me?
03:36Like a camera, I use negatives to develop.
03:53Why don't you add a grass skirt to that outfit and dance around a volcano?
03:57No.
03:59All right. All right. I'll see you later.
04:01Hey, where are you going, Robert?
04:02I'm gonna go across the street.
04:04I want to share the path with Mom and Dad.
04:07Oh, my God! He's in a cult!
04:14It's not a cult, Ma.
04:16Then why the hell did you hug me?
04:21It made me happy.
04:23Oh, my God! He's in a cult!
04:26It's not a cult. It's just a bunch of people who want to see me happy,
04:30who happen to care about me.
04:32You have that here, you stupid ass!
04:41Well, they said you might not understand, but that's okay.
04:45I'm not gonna judge.
04:46Back! Get back!
04:50All right. I'm gonna go out and try to find some old photos.
04:53Inner Path wants to do a collage of our former selves.
04:59Look what you did.
05:00You never hugged him enough as a child.
05:02Now he's gonna shave his head and sit on the floor at the airport.
05:09Hey.
05:15All right, listen. Was Robert here?
05:17Yeah, it was horrible.
05:18He hugged me.
05:20He hugged me, too? He's hugging everything.
05:22All right, we have to do something. Robert is so impressionable.
05:25Yeah, he's a doe. So what do we do?
05:29We have to get him out of this.
05:31Raymond, you have to talk to him.
05:39You know, Ray, maybe you could find out more about this Inner Path, Ray.
05:42Maybe you could take Robert up on his offer.
05:44No, uh, no, I couldn't.
05:45What offer?
05:46He asked me to go to a meeting with him.
05:48You have to do that, Raymond. These people sound like maniacs.
05:55No.
05:57No, no, I'm not. Look.
05:59Come on, I'm not going to one of those things.
06:01Huh? What if they drug me and I wake up chained to a goat?
06:07You just described my wedding.
06:17I heard that.
06:22Hey, brother man.
06:24Hey, okay, okay. Don't hug me. Listen, listen.
06:28I'm gonna go to one of those meetings with you.
06:32That's nice. That's a family.
06:41Okay, everybody. Let's get started.
06:48Oh, Chas.
06:50Well, if you're sitting in a chair, you can't be down to earth.
06:56Hey, Ray.
06:57Hey, Gerard.
07:01Okay. First things first.
07:03Good neighbor policy. Everybody turn to left.
07:10Don't forget the right.
07:16Super.
07:17Now, I'm looking around the room and I see a new face.
07:22A happy face.
07:23A face I'd like to know.
07:31This is my brother, Raymond.
07:33Welcome to the path, Raymond.
07:35Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond.
07:46Hey.
07:48Raymond, why don't you tell everybody a little bit about yourself?
07:51You said I did that. I wouldn't have to talk.
07:53Raymond has a wife and three children,
07:56and he is also the writer for Newsday.
07:59Oh, we all know who he is, Robert.
08:05You do?
08:06Yeah.
08:07Gerard did mention that he was Ray's cousin,
08:09and gosh, Ray,
08:10we are just so super honored to have you with us.
08:14A famous newspaper columnist,
08:16Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond.
08:22That really gets you going, huh?
08:27Our leader likes to bring notables into the fold
08:30so that we can better explain our mission to the world.
08:33And you, Ray Barone, are a notable.
08:36Huh. Tell that to my wife.
08:47Uh, i-i-i-excuse me.
08:49So, you used me to get to Ray?
08:53No, no, no. Not used.
08:55More like...
09:03It's nice to have you with us too, Robert.
09:05Robert! Robert! Robert! Robert! Robert!
09:24Aw!
09:27It's okay. It's okay. It's okay, okay.
09:34Well, I, for one, am somewhat disillusioned.
09:39why because they liked me had nothing to do with the creepy smiling in the
09:43touching I don't know what I'm doing what's wrong with you look at these
09:50not just bye what were you thinking I just haven't been so great lately I feel
10:03like I got nothing to count on and now this thing with Ma and Debra it's it's got me I
10:13don't know
10:27I'll tell you though when you told us about inner path it actually got both of them in the same
10:33room
10:33for a few minutes because they were so freaked out really they were worried about me yeah yeah
10:42hey you know what there might be something we could do
10:50what do you mean man wasn't that a great meeting Raymond I am on cloud nine
10:58can you guys give me a lift home somebody stole my car
11:09hey that's so
11:15what's the matter it's bad
11:19come on what's bad they're freaks they're freaking mind-melting freaks and they got Robert
11:25what do you mean they got Robert they're in his head don't you get it this was my brother
11:32it's okay no it's not okay Debra it's not not this time
11:37not this time
11:41I saw them I saw them they got Robert so turned around he doesn't even wear underpants anymore
11:47they don't wear underpants that were the freaks
11:52what are we gonna do I don't know that's what I've been trying to figure out I called the precinct
11:57to
11:57talk to his partner you know what she wants to do she wants to come over and have one of
11:59those
12:00insurrections or something an intervention yeah yeah yeah yeah Judy said she has experience in
12:05that thing but that doesn't work does it well I don't know Judy what what's going on I know you
12:11don't think an intervention can help your brother Ray but he's my partner and I sure as hell I'm
12:14gonna try that okay with you Debra uh yeah I guess if you really think good it's very simple
12:20we locked the door in the sucker and love bomb a sorry ass
12:25how are you gonna get Robert I told Robert you wanted him here at nine o'clock for cake
12:30he fell for that that boy always falls for cake
12:34hurry up it's almost nine
12:40hi ma hello Raymond I'm here for Robbie hello Judy dear yeah yeah now listen up people
12:49you just do what I say and we'll be fine and no matter what no matter how much Robert wants
12:54to
12:54get out of here and he will we do not let him we stay here as long as it takes
12:59to let Robert know
13:00that you are his family and that family that love is stronger than any crazy face loser collection of
13:05pinheads where's Frank he's at the lodge which is for the best he's not really good with love
13:14all right see you fellas
13:23hello everybody what's up
13:31mom why are you here with Debra I'm not here with anyone dear I'm here because I love you
13:38oh my god
13:41all right
14:08I know what this is and you can all talk until you're blue in the face but it will not
14:14do you
14:14any good the path is straight and the children of the path shall walk upon it
14:24straightly on its straighty straightness you see you see this is what I'm talking about
14:32it's worse now what do you do to him why is he smiling like that no underpants
14:47Robert you can't really belend me
14:52hey partner remember me yes Judy I worked with you on the force but I've given up that life to
14:59become a full-time pathist I've almost got the green shirt this is bad all right Ray I want you
15:11to say something to Robert no look look look I can't talk I'm not a talk person Ray I want
15:16you
15:16to speak to your brother today like he matters he does matter to me Judy I guess I can't stand
15:24seeing
15:25him like this don't tell me
15:52okay okay look I know I don't say
15:57this enough but you are my brother and i love you okay but here's the thing you you should know
16:06that
16:07by now right i don't have to tell you i mean yeah yeah we get mad at each other but
16:13we never let it
16:14get too far you know because because we're family and and we don't walk away this this is walking
16:24away and i don't want you to do it because you're like a part of me
16:45hey what's going on what no joey don't open it what is this a party what you locked me out
16:53to
16:53keep me away from cake now just go home frank yeah dad go how come you're not at the lodge
16:59the pool's got a
17:01fungus well what's the party for the dalai lama over here okay come on please dad not now hello dolly
17:15well hello dolly it's so nice that my son's head is filled with crap
17:25frank can i see you for a minute see what we're trying to do here is reinforce the family thing
17:31let robert know we're here for him nurture him a little bit today
17:39oh
17:47hey moron
17:50this whole life that's why he has no brain that's why he can't think for himself
17:54that's why he joins a freaking cult snap out of it luckhead you know what the only thing you need
18:02now is a good kick in the pants
18:09oh yeah what's that huh the name of your parenting book a good kick in the pants
18:16well thanks a lot dad it's worked wonders for me over the years come on rub don't listen to him
18:21he pees in
18:21the yard come on stop i'm leaving no no you can't leave now come on we're almost there no we're
18:27not
18:27okay just forget it ray i'm going back to inner path this is a negative place and it's not just
18:33him
18:34he's just the poster boy it's her and her too wait wait what about me what about what i just
18:38said
18:38nice try but you're not that good an actor
18:45what are you gonna do now you're just gonna you're gonna go back to your stupid cult it's not
18:49a cult okay i'm sorry everybody but i've confirmed something here today
18:55that the path to inner peace and harmony clearly cannot be found in this family goodbye
19:02robert please sit down yes please dear don't join a cult have some cake no
19:11robert i just want to talk to you why because i care about you and i'm your mother why would
19:16i
19:16take advice about life from you two you can't even talk to each other yes we can
19:46we are a family we love each other
19:49please don't leave
19:50please don't leave okay
20:04wait wait wait a minute you guys plan this whole thing what
20:09desperate times call for desperate measures you're not mad are you no i'm not mad how could i be
20:19mad when you give deborah back to me yeah well then there's somebody else you should thank
20:28and the oscar goes too
20:33yeah but what was with that slap in the head
20:36i was in the moment
20:40you were tricking us what you're mad at me now how come you're fine with them because they're nice
20:48boys and you're a gloating nincompoop let me show you the cake i made it's chocolate but it's different
20:54than the usual one that i have
20:59robert this cult how many wives can you have
21:07oh man great game yeah i still don't get why you ever wanted to join a stupid cult
21:15all right
21:16all right dad and you know what that was stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid
21:26nice to be back yeah this is what it's all about flagpole
21:34last the ball game free will doing what you want when you want it you don't get that in any
21:40stinking coke all right tv off it's lunch okay what are we having chicken we wanted roast beef we're having
21:50chicken
22:10uh
22:13and
22:25and
22:26and
22:26and
22:27and
22:27and
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