- 15 hours ago
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FunTranscript
00:02Hey.
00:03Hey. Help my mom with the bags, huh?
00:07Hello, Raymond.
00:08Oh, hey, hey. Let me get that for you there.
00:10Mom.
00:12Raymond, I have to say,
00:14I just love hearing you calling me that.
00:18Yes, Ray. I heard. Very sweet.
00:22I'm just gonna go check on the kids.
00:25Look, Ray. I bought the donut holes you like.
00:29Uh, don't show Debra.
00:31Ah, chocolate.
00:33Thanks, Mom.
00:37Hello, Marie.
00:38Hi. Hey.
00:40Hi. Oh, didn't hear ya.
00:44Gonna tie a bell around your neck.
00:53Hello, Lois.
00:54I didn't mean to interrupt anything.
00:56No, no, no. Raymond's just helping me with the groceries.
00:58He is such a nice boy.
01:02Yes, indeed.
01:04You know, Lois, you're here for such a short time.
01:07Let me unpack those groceries.
01:08You go enjoy your grandchildren.
01:10Are you sure, Marie?
01:11Of course.
01:12Raymond will stay and help me.
01:14Oh, okay. Great.
01:29So, you and Lois are getting along.
01:32Oh, yeah. She's all right, I guess.
01:36You two seem to be very familiar.
01:40Oh, you mean the mom thing?
01:42Yeah, remember how I called her that at Thanksgiving the one time?
01:45I don't know. I guess she likes it, so...
01:48Throw her a bone.
01:51I think it's wonderful that you're still doing it.
01:54Yeah?
01:55Of course.
01:56I'm very happy for you.
01:59You have two moms now.
02:01This new one and the one God gave you.
02:12Gotta get that bell.
02:23Well, the children are down.
02:26And I think that's gonna do it for me for tonight, too.
02:29Oh, thanks, Mom. Good night.
02:31Good night, dear.
02:31Good night, Raymond.
02:37Good night, you.
02:41And you, and you, and you.
02:45Sound of Music. I love that movie.
02:56What was that?
02:59What?
02:59Well, why didn't you call her Mom?
03:02I don't know.
03:03Why does anybody do anything?
03:08I mean, you were doing it, and now you're not doing it anymore?
03:12Well, I was wondering, do I have to constantly say it?
03:14You know, I don't call you the same thing every time, my hot little chuckle monkey.
03:21Yeah, but you know she likes Mom.
03:24Hey, look, I'm just, I'm mixing it up.
03:26I'm picking my spots.
03:27I'm keeping it fresh.
03:30I don't know, honey, but I liked it that you two were getting closer, you know?
03:33It was nice.
03:34It felt like a family.
03:37Them's the breaks.
03:40Hey, come on.
03:42What?
03:43Look, it's just, it makes things kind of confusing around here.
03:47Confusing?
03:48You call her Mom, she calls you Raymond.
03:50Right, and all of a sudden, this place is crawling with moms.
03:53Right?
03:54You're a mom, she's a mom.
03:56There's that one over there.
04:00Wait a minute.
04:01Did your mom tell you not to call my mom, Mom?
04:05No, she didn't.
04:07But she, she caught me saying it today, and an icy wind through this room did blow.
04:21What do you mean she caught you?
04:23Have you been hiding it from her?
04:24No, I'm just, I'm just trying to make sure everyone in this family is emotionally groovy.
04:32So you're just gonna cave in to your mother again?
04:35Please.
04:37Okay, Ray, fine, but I just thought it was really nice for my mom.
04:40And for you, too.
04:42Things between you two seem to be so healthy.
04:44Your relationship is, like, really starting to blossom.
04:47But you wanna ruin a good thing? Fine, it won't be the first time.
04:51Oh, come on.
04:53Look, it's not like you call my mom, Mom.
04:55Oh, yeah.
04:59No, wait, wait.
05:00What are you scoffing at that for?
05:02Why don't you call my mom, Mom?
05:04What are you kidding me?
05:05Oh, yeah.
05:06See, huh?
05:07Yeah, it's easy to use the glue when you don't have to kill the horse yourself.
05:16What?
05:19No, no, I'm staying with that.
05:20That makes sense.
05:24Yeah, Ray, I think things between your mom and me are a little bit different.
05:28Oh, yeah, really?
05:29How so?
05:29Look, I see her every day.
05:32We're together all the time.
05:34That's right.
05:34That's all the more reason why you should call her Mom.
05:37Things could be much more healthier between you two.
05:41That's right.
05:44Your relationship could really start to blossom.
05:50Ah, nothing to say today?
06:01For you.
06:10Hey, guys.
06:12Hey, Deb.
06:13What's going on?
06:14Nothing.
06:15Eating Zeppelis.
06:16Oh.
06:17Is, uh, is Marie around?
06:19I wanted to borrow her big spoon.
06:21Oh, is that it?
06:23Oh, yeah.
06:24Thanks.
06:30You okay?
06:31Uh, yeah.
06:32Yeah, I thought maybe I'd also say hi to Marie.
06:39Why would you want to do something like that?
06:42No reason.
06:44I'm just checking in.
06:45Let me get her for you.
06:48Marie!
06:53She will be with you presently.
06:58You know what?
06:59Actually, it's not important.
07:01Maybe I'll come back later.
07:02Thanks.
07:03What is it, Frank?
07:04You need to be burped?
07:06Here you go, Deb.
07:08Thank you, Frank.
07:09What is it, Debra?
07:11Oh, nothing.
07:14So, how are you, Ma-ry?
07:20I'm fine, dear.
07:21How are you?
07:22Oh, good.
07:24Just, uh, thought I'd say hello and check in.
07:27Oh, how nice.
07:31So, hello.
07:32Hello.
07:34Well, hello to you, too.
07:38Scintillating.
07:41Oh, oh, and, um, I was also gonna borrow your big spoon, if that's okay.
07:44I wanted to make goulash.
07:46Oh, you're gonna try that again?
07:49Well, that's good, honey.
07:50Get right back on that horse.
07:54Okay.
07:55Thanks.
07:58So, listen.
07:59Oh, oh, I almost forgot.
08:00I picked up a book for you.
08:03A is for apron.
08:05A beginner's cookbook.
08:08I saw that in the bookstore and I thought of you.
08:12Isn't that cute?
08:14Yeah, that's just, uh, so typically thoughtful.
08:19I'm gonna go away now.
08:22Are you all right?
08:23Uh, just a, a little headache comes and goes.
08:25Really coming on now.
08:27Wait, wait, wait.
08:28Sit down.
08:29Let me get you some aspirin.
08:31I have three different kinds.
08:34Sometimes I get those headaches when I come over, too, Deb.
08:38Which kind is it?
08:40Dull, pounding, or axed to the back of the skull?
08:45Here you go, dear.
08:47Okay, here.
08:48Here, here.
08:50Oh, I hope you feel better.
08:55Thanks.
08:56Mom.
09:09So sorry, what was that?
09:12I said, thanks, Mom.
09:16Oh, you don't have to do that, dear.
09:18No, I, I want to.
09:24That's all right.
09:39My name's not Judy.
09:50What's going on?
09:51What happened?
09:52She rejected me.
09:55What are you talking about?
09:56Your mother.
09:58I went over there, and I called her mom, and she turned me down.
10:05Really?
10:06I told her that I wanted to call her mom, and she just went, that's all right.
10:12Huh.
10:14Why did you make me do that?
10:16Come out of here.
10:17I didn't, I didn't make you do it.
10:20I was just trying to win an argument.
10:22I didn't think that you would actually try it.
10:25Not believe her.
10:26She's unbelievable.
10:27Your mother is unbelievable.
10:29I believe you.
10:31Hey, Deb.
10:32Oh, good.
10:33You guys were there.
10:34Was that the most humiliating thing you have ever seen?
10:37Brutal, Raymond.
10:41I felt bad for you, sweetheart.
10:43Had trouble finishing my lunch.
10:47What happened?
10:48After she said no, what did you do?
10:50Just sat there, like an idiot.
10:53Us too.
10:56Marie just went about her business as if nothing had happened.
10:59I know how you feel, Deb.
11:01That's just how she is.
11:03Only certain people are allowed in the pantheon of affection.
11:07The Pope, Frank Sinatra, Placido Domingo, and Raymond.
11:15You just gotta let it go, that's all.
11:16You gotta let it go!
11:23Yeah, like he did.
11:27I know what.
11:28Maybe I'll start calling her Marie.
11:31Bet you wouldn't even notice.
11:33Hello, Marie.
11:34Hello, Robbie.
11:35Have you seen Placido Domingo?
11:39Or Raymond?
11:42Hey, I tell you what.
11:43If it'll make you feel better, you can call me Dad.
11:47Thanks.
11:48How about Big Daddy?
11:51I saw that in a movie once.
11:53I don't get it, Deb.
11:54Why'd you want to call her mom anyway?
11:55I don't know.
11:56I just thought it would be nice.
11:57I mean, Ray is calling my mom, Mom.
11:59But the difference is, my mom is good and sweet and kind.
12:03Your mother, on the other hand, is...
12:05Need some help?
12:11Well, listen, look.
12:12You tried.
12:13You're off the hook now, right?
12:14You didn't really want to call her mom anyway.
12:16Well, that's before I knew she didn't want me to.
12:19It's just...
12:20I don't know.
12:20I mean, why did she do that to me?
12:23Why doesn't she want me to call her mom?
12:25I know we've had our differences over the years, but I thought we were closer than this.
12:30Maybe she doesn't think I'm good enough.
12:33I remember the year I took opera lessons.
12:41Come on, Deb, huh?
12:42Don't feel sad.
12:44Thanks for telling me how to feel, Ray.
12:47You know, I've got a headache.
12:49I'm going to go lie down.
12:56What should I do?
12:57Should I go up there?
12:58What would you say to her?
12:59I don't know.
13:00What do you think?
13:01That you should never go up there.
13:05Should I talk to mom?
13:09What are you going to say to her?
13:12Listen to me.
13:14This is about feelings.
13:15You know anything about feelings?
13:17Of course you don't.
13:19None of us do.
13:22So just sit down, shut up,
13:26loosen your pants.
13:28What more can we do?
13:33I've got leftovers.
13:43Hello, dear.
13:45I've got the extra zeppelis.
13:46If I leave them at our house, your father will just eat them until he explodes.
13:49Yeah.
13:51So I guess you'd talk to Deborah.
13:52Well, yeah, how's her headache?
13:53Not good, Ma.
13:54Oh.
13:55Why did you tell her she can't call you Mom?
13:56Huh?
13:57She's very upset.
13:58She is?
13:59Of course!
14:00You couldn't see that?
14:01Even Robert and Dad could tell that.
14:03Guys, couldn't you...
14:15Are you telling me that Deborah really wants to call me Mom?
14:18Yes, yes, she does.
14:20I think she's just doing that because she wants you to call Lois Mom.
14:23No!
14:24No!
14:24No!
14:25No!
14:26I've said four no's.
14:27It deserves even more.
14:31Well, then.
14:32Why, all of a sudden, after 12 years, am I suddenly Mom?
14:38Well...
14:39You know, maybe Deborah's the kind of person that takes a while to warm up.
14:43That's all.
14:44Huh?
14:45You know, she just started calling me Honey like two weeks ago.
14:49Look, come...
14:50Just let her call your Mom.
14:52Huh?
14:52What's the big deal?
14:53Because it wasn't a real request.
14:56It wasn't genuine.
14:57And you know me, Raymond.
14:59I'm nothing if I'm not genuine.
15:02Yeah, I know.
15:03We all know what a genuine person you are.
15:08Oh, look.
15:10You were right, okay?
15:11Deborah did go over there because she likes when I call her mother Mom,
15:14and I told her she had to call you Mom because...
15:17I don't know.
15:18I just like to bother her.
15:19But...
15:22But, you know, she did something nice, Ma,
15:25and when you turned her down, you hurt her feelings.
15:29How could I hurt her feelings if they're not real?
15:32Look, I'm not pretending to understand any of this.
15:36But think about it.
15:38If her feelings got hurt, doesn't that mean they were real?
15:44I read somewhere, that's like the test for feelings.
15:50Remember the Tin Man guy?
15:52Uh, I know I got a heart because it's broken.
16:00And then, and then everybody said,
16:02Oh, poor Tin Man guy.
16:09Hello.
16:09Oh, Deborah.
16:10I'm just gonna go get a drink and then I'll be out of your way.
16:12No, Deborah, wait, wait.
16:16Deborah, I'm sorry.
16:18I should have let you call me Mom.
16:21If that's what you want to do, you should do it.
16:24Because I want you to.
16:28That's all right.
16:28No, no, it's...
16:30No.
16:32No, it's not all right.
16:35Raymond told me you only came over because he made you.
16:37No, that's not what I said.
16:38Right.
16:39He said he did it because he likes to bother you.
16:44I had no idea how much I meant to you, that you could possibly be hurt by what I said.
16:51Oh.
16:53That's not what I want.
16:56I want you to think of yourself as my daughter.
17:00Because that's how I think of you.
17:04Oh, Marie.
17:06Oh, Deborah.
17:08Oh.
17:10So, you'll call me Mom?
17:13I guess I will.
17:15Oh, that's wonderful.
17:19Do it.
17:30Mom.
17:30Oh, that's so nice.
17:33That is nice.
17:34Yeah.
17:35Would you like some iced tea?
17:37Would I like some iced tea?
17:39Mom.
17:40Oh, that's so nice.
17:49See?
17:50Now it's blossoming.
17:52Yeah.
17:53Wait a minute.
17:54What does this mean for me, though?
17:55What am I supposed to call Deborah's mom?
17:58What do you think?
17:59Well, she's not here that often.
18:02I mean, every other Christmas, Thanksgiving, a birthday here and there.
18:06All right.
18:07You can call her, Mom.
18:08Aw.
18:09Thanks, Mom.
18:10Aw.
18:11That's such a pleasant change from the way boys say it.
18:14Don't tell Robbie, but I always wanted him to be a girl.
18:25I might have to tell him that.
18:30Hi, Mom.
18:31Hi, Mom.
18:32Hi.
18:34Mom.
18:36Hello, Raymond.
18:39Hello.
18:39Hello.
18:39So, how was the park?
18:40Oh, it was fun for the children.
18:43I'm gonna go freshen up.
18:44Oh.
18:45I ought to get back to the house, too.
18:47Okay.
18:47Bye, Mom.
18:47Bye, dear.
18:48Bye, dear.
18:51I think she was talking to me.
18:55Yeah.
18:56I'm gonna start calling Marie Mom.
18:58Isn't that nice?
18:59Oh?
19:00That is nice.
19:03You know, like you and Raymond.
19:06Mm-hmm.
19:07Mm-hmm.
19:09What's wrong?
19:10Is something the matter?
19:11No, no, no, no, nothing.
19:13It just sounded a little strange hearing you call her Mom,
19:16because I'm your mom.
19:21Well, I'm Raymond's mom, and I don't have a problem with this.
19:26I'm sorry.
19:27I can't explain it, but just hearing Deborah saying that,
19:31it just feels wrong.
19:34Well, pardon me for saying it, but isn't that a little hypocritical?
19:38I mean, here I am, ready to embrace this.
19:41I know, and pardon me for saying this,
19:44but maybe in this case, it really isn't up to you.
19:49I mean...
19:51Well, heaven forbid you don't get your way for once.
20:00Well, may I just ask, what the hell is that supposed to be?
20:19I'm just going by what I see around here.
20:23Well, at least I'm always here, not like some mothers.
20:26Well, some mothers might say that you're here a little too much.
20:30Oh, really?
20:32Well, maybe I should be off living some swinging singles life
20:36that's inappropriate for my age.
20:38Swinging?
20:38That's right, party girl.
20:40Okay, all right, all right.
20:42That's enough.
20:42That's enough.
20:45You know, I think it might be best for all concerned
20:47if we just go back to the way it was.
20:49Okay, no more mom calling.
20:52Well, maybe that's a good idea.
20:54All right.
20:56It's fine with me, but if it's too hard for some other people...
20:58Okay!
21:02Is it okay? Because I'm coming out now.
21:07I think we're fine.
21:09Okay.
21:11Well, uh...
21:12If I'm not supposed to call you mom, then what should I call you?
21:15Well, whatever you're comfortable with.
21:17Oh.
21:18All right, then.
21:22You.
21:29Everything's fine now.
21:36Here you go, Robbie.
21:39Thanks, Marie.
21:43Oh!
21:50Bob.
21:51I'm sorry.
21:54I'm sorry.
21:59I'm sorry.
22:01I'm sorry.
22:03I'm sorry.
22:06I'm sorry.
22:09I'm sorry.
22:09I'm sorry.
22:09I'm sorry.
22:09I'm sorry.
22:11I'm sorry.
22:12I'm sorry.
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