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  • 13 hours ago
Deniseea and Darnell are a newly married couple who, in all honesty, are really cool. Based in New Orleans, their love of cocktails and culture inspired them to open up their own speakeasy that they run in their spare time. This blended family consists of two kiddos, a great dane, and thriving creatives. Check out their love story on this episode of Dear Black Love. 

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Transcript
00:00Being black is our favorite thing.
00:01That is the number one thing, right?
00:04Seriously, it is the most fun that we have.
00:06All black, everything.
00:11How do we meet?
00:12How do we meet?
00:14Part one.
00:16There's two parts.
00:17I'm starting at Noki.
00:20I'm making cocktails, I'm in the zone,
00:22and I remember when you walked in,
00:24and I'm like, oh my God, who is that?
00:28I remember you're like, give me your number.
00:31And then I hit you with, I can give you my Instagram.
00:36Your story of us meeting starts after I first met you.
00:41First time was at Mardi Gras,
00:43and you were working a bar event,
00:45and that was my very first time ever running into you.
00:48And I remember noticing you.
00:50I feel like my soul was always looking for you
00:53every time I was out in New Orleans.
00:55I remember we finally went to lunch.
00:58We were talking a lot, but then we finally went to lunch.
01:00Then the world ended, right?
01:02It did.
01:03It shut down.
01:04Like legit, like right after that.
01:06I just remember communicating a lot.
01:08I remember feeling because we were talking so much,
01:11I was able to open up and be so vulnerable
01:14with you in a way that was new for me.
01:17It went from the communication
01:19until you were just dropping dinner off at the house.
01:21I've never eaten more Mexican food
01:24before this period of my life.
01:26I met Roman first, right?
01:28I was so nervous.
01:29I was like, oh my God, what if he doesn't like me?
01:32And he was the sweetest.
01:36He was like very confused.
01:38Like, it's usually just me and my daddy.
01:40Like, but you've been here for a couple days now.
01:42I feel like he needed answers.
01:44Like early on, he, but then it stopped.
01:46Then he was like, when are you coming over?
01:48Yes.
01:49He was expecting you to be around.
01:50I said, oh, we're together together.
01:52I do remember that.
01:54I don't know how to pick one thing I'm grateful for.
01:57The first thing that comes to mind
01:59I'm grateful for in this marriage
02:01is being able to have a family.
02:04That's the first and foremost,
02:06to be able to have you and the boys.
02:10I remember trying to help you understand that,
02:12hey, you know, remember these are just kids.
02:14And like, they see you as a mother figure to them.
02:18Like, they absolutely love you
02:20because they can feel and sense love from you.
02:22And I will always tell you that, like,
02:23don't overthink it.
02:24Don't worry about it.
02:26Like, these are literally just kids.
02:28And they are so happy to have you.
02:31I just expected to be a lifelong bachelor
02:33because I've been a parent my entire life.
02:35And, you know, you're not really
02:37having women date you seriously
02:39when you were a young father
02:42because if they don't have kids,
02:43they trying to, you know,
02:45they think about their future, rightfully so.
02:47And they don't want to necessarily
02:48always take on a pre-baked family.
02:52I never felt as good about anyone else in their life
02:56as I did with you.
02:58And that was instantaneous.
03:00It was instant.
03:01It might have been the Mexican food again
03:02that you were feeding us.
03:03I was feeding y'all real good.
03:04I do remember that.
03:05It was instant.
03:06I remember the first date.
03:09And see, it was opposite for me.
03:11I knew I wasn't having any kids.
03:13So that was always a struggle
03:15while I was dating.
03:16And I remember you telling me about the boys.
03:19And I'm like, oh, that's perfect.
03:21That's so sweet.
03:22And it was my time to ask the infamous question.
03:26And I was like, do you want any more?
03:28And before I could get more, you said nope.
03:30No, I said hell no.
03:32And I was like, perfect.
03:34I'm going to be a super duper step mommy.
03:36And pre-baked is the best.
03:40I fully expect to be retired by you in the next.
03:44Ten.
03:45Give me ten.
03:46I give you ten.
03:47That's fine.
03:48So in the next five to ten years,
03:50I see us just growing our impact,
03:52raising these boys
03:53and seeing them off to be successful men
03:56that we know that they will be.
03:58And then from there,
03:59us deciding to,
04:01I have no idea.
04:03Like, your brain is all here, there, and everywhere
04:06in the best way possible.
04:09What's most important for me right now
04:10is to develop and build this family
04:12and build this relationship,
04:13which is a challenge
04:15because I care so much for this thing to work.
04:18And for this to work,
04:20I need that to work.
04:21After all that is said and done,
04:23we come back to the bar that we've built
04:25and the environment that we've created
04:27for people to enjoy.
04:28And then for me,
04:29just to play a supporting role in the background,
04:31making sure that things are out of your way
04:34and that you're not thinking about certain things
04:35so that you can practice your craft.
04:38That's really important for me
04:39to give the opportunity and space
04:41so that you can do what you do well.
04:44How does it feel to love a black man?
04:46It feels like it was one of the most important things
04:53I was meant to do.
04:55I was meant to love and protect a black man.
05:00I was meant to give all of myself to a black man.
05:05I couldn't see myself doing anything else.
05:08Like, I was here to love you.
05:10I was here to love a black man.
05:13How does it feel to love a black woman?
05:18I think it's absolutely accurate for you to feel
05:23that you were meant to or you were supposed to
05:26or like you are.
05:27This is what you're here to do.
05:28Because I think as a black man,
05:31before feeling and receiving the love of a black woman,
05:34I think the word that is most fitting is incomplete.
05:39As a black man, lacking that black woman love,
05:43I know that I had a sense of incompletion.
05:47And so that's what it feels for me to love a black woman.
05:50I feel like there is completion.
05:52For us, I think we're both seeking that spirit of completion
05:56and black is at the root of that.
06:11I feel like you told me so much.
06:14What?
06:14Right now.
06:15We talk about this all the time.
06:17Not like that.
06:18You look like this about to cry.
06:19Ooh.
06:20Don't do that.
06:22I'm about to be crying.
06:23Don't do that.
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