00:00Sabrina Nighty's show As Westbridge Turns
00:05Sabrina tells Salem that he needs to update his fur color.
00:09Why does she think he needs to?
00:11Salem's right that black's always fashionable.
00:14She keeps whining, and then he humors her.
00:17If she's so insistent, I guess I can't blame him for not running away.
00:21She says she triple tracked the magic book, which she shouldn't have had to do, and points to him.
00:27And somehow she gets rid of all of his fur by accident, when she wouldn't have imagined that.
00:32And she didn't even say any magic words, so there's nothing to screw up.
00:38And somehow she thinks she needs to get her hands instead of simply pointing and imagining him as how he was.
00:45Sabrina tries to cheer up Jenny in her boredom by making a joke.
00:49Harvey happily gives Sabrina some good news she doesn't care about since it's about getting his car realigned.
00:56Libby brags that she gets to model clothes, and this takes too long.
01:00I'm glad Harvey turns down, escorting her with a tux.
01:05Zelda says if you're bored, you know who's to blame.
01:09And somehow Sabrina says Libby.
01:11She's right that it's up to you to make your own fun.
01:14I like that she's researching inertia.
01:17I like that Salem says it's fun to stare at Lindt as it flies around the air.
01:22I understand, because you never know which way it's gonna go.
01:26Hilda relates to Sabrina and says her life can become exciting and snaps up a can of magic worms that would cause all emotions to become heightened.
01:35But warns her that you'd have to take the good with the bad.
01:39But then at school she's told the janitor collapsed and he's in a stretcher.
01:44So that's not heightening her emotions directly.
01:48Because she doesn't care about this afterwards.
01:51I thought I was gonna brainwash her into becoming more emotional.
01:55So she should've refused this.
01:57And the only reason she'd get to zap up a can of magic worms is that she really just warped them to her.
02:04But they're in her house.
02:05So they're hers.
02:06So she made them travel through a wormhole that's invisible to get here.
02:10Sabrina's reaction to a collapsed janitor is to happily say that things are getting more exciting.
02:16Like a psychopath.
02:18That's not Sabrina.
02:20Harvey says he wants to meet with Sabrina at 6am for something romantic.
02:24And Harvey doesn't like being told about reproduction.
02:27But he just talks about the ovum.
02:29And then we see the blackboard and it's just drawings of cells.
02:33That's not what Sabrina had in mind.
02:35She looks bored here.
02:37And they would've been taught this before high school.
02:40I don't know if they do things differently in America.
02:43But where I was from it was a few years before high school.
02:47Mr. Pol's getting to kiss the nurse.
02:50But the nurse threatens Sabrina because if the school found out they'd be fired.
02:54Even though they have tenure.
02:56Sabrina's asked to go steady with Harvey.
02:59And Libby finds a diamond ring in the science class.
03:02Mr. Pol sees a wasp and hides from it.
03:05And I like the music that plays when he talks to the guy with the eye patch because it's cheesy.
03:10It's trying to be menacing but it's also silly.
03:13Libby distracts Sabrina with historical trivia while putting something in Sabrina's bag just out of her sight.
03:19Libby freaks out about wasps and fades.
03:22And Harvey says she's in shock and needs to go to the nurse.
03:25So he brings her to the nurse who says don't you quit on me.
03:29Which she'd only be so overdramatic about if she's brainwashed by the spell.
03:33Harvey doesn't even consider staying with Libby thankfully.
03:37So it doesn't cross the line with its soap opera parody.
03:40Yet.
03:41It's just being entertaining.
03:42What does Harvey say still for so long after being told look out from the ladder falling towards him?
03:48He had seconds to dodge it.
03:50He gets hit in the head.
03:52And I saw from a mile away that he'd get amnesia.
03:55Caught to Libby to tell him that no matter what anyone says she's his girlfriend and the only one he can trust.
04:01He'd have to be stupid or brainwashed to think someone who says I'm the only one you can trust is trustworthy.
04:09Comic Harvey's stupid.
04:11But the show has been ignoring how dumb he is until now.
04:14Sabrina would just point to cure Harvey's amnesia.
04:18She'd get away with it because she could say he got over it naturally.
04:22Which does happen.
04:23Libby only goes just outside of the room and says ruining her life.
04:28So Harvey would have heard her say that.
04:30Mr. Poole complains that he had to give up professional haircuts to buy the diamond ring and now it's gone.
04:37So history got rewritten a little.
04:39The fact that Sabrina happily gave him her backpack makes it obvious that the ring was planted in her bank.
04:45It's annoying but at least I can forgive it because only magic made this happen.
04:49So I can assume he was brainwashed into being a crazy moron.
04:53How does this guy know that Harvey has amnesia so he doesn't make a good witness?
04:58I guess Sabrina can't use magic to cure his amnesia because that's part of the can of worms spell.
05:05But she never even tries so that doesn't explain it.
05:10Why would they even allow the can of worms to be sold?
05:14Considering how horribly it could go when you can't undo any of it until it's done.
05:20Somehow the ants can't make the can of worms spell stop right away.
05:24If the logic is that it's because they're magical gummy worms.
05:28Then you'd think they could just use other magical items to instantly undo the effect.
05:33How many people would have lost loved ones to the can of worms spell?
05:38Jenny doesn't want Libby to steal Sabrina's boyfriend.
05:41So she's gonna be a loyal friend.
05:44Sabrina thinks she's going to jail even though she's from a family of omnipotent witches.
05:49Libby says this is the best night of her life.
05:52Total control.
05:54Harvey would have run away from her in fear after hearing that.
05:57The janitor hears Jenny call for help and she falls out with Sabrina's bracelet which instantly gets her off the hook because the guy was right there.
06:06Sabrina didn't have to do anything to earn this.
06:09It just fell out of the sky.
06:12That's such a rushed lame anticlimax.
06:15I thought she was gonna stop Jenny because she's a goody two shoes.
06:20Jenny conveniently didn't get injured by the fall because her hair broke her fall.
06:25Which makes no sense especially in a soap opera situation.
06:29Sabrina's aunts give her a dress and Libby saying she thought she sent her to juvie would expose her as evil to everyone.
06:37The bracelet alone restores Harvey's memory and Sabrina and Libby do some hardly violent fighting and fall in the water.
06:44Because of the soap opera Harvey says he missed Sabrina too.
06:49And they hug.
06:50Libby's excommunicated from the team board.
06:53Why did she say excommunicated?
06:56She's not a nun.
06:58I guess it's a jab at soap operas having silly dialogue.
07:02The nurse doesn't get proposed to because of places being attacked by wasps.
07:07And the-
07:09And-
07:10This is such a silly episode.
07:13So many different things are happening.
07:16And the guy who's accusing Sabrina finds his long lost sister here.
07:19As if we're supposed to care.
07:21And I like the music.
07:23Then the nurse tells Mr. Poole she's met someone and is going away.
07:28He goes from sad to maturely saying,
07:31Oh well it got a lot farther than I thought I would.
07:34And she walks away happily with a janitor who got stung hundreds of times.
07:38The story ends with Sabrina captivated with lint spotting.
07:43Why did she give it a chance if it was boring for the first hour?
07:47She says it's a metaphor for life.
07:50And Salem hypocritically says she needs to get out more.
07:54But why?
07:55How is it not a metaphor for life?
07:58It moves around a lot and unpredictably.
08:01This entertaining story by Nick Paquet.
08:04Is about Sabrina having a soap opera day.
08:07Because she ate from a can of magical worms Hilda irresponsibly gave her.
08:11Just because she whined by her life being boring.
08:13A daily problem.
08:15Which leads to Libby framing her for stealing a diamond ring.
08:19The fact that the cop or whatever still didn't believe her.
08:23Even though she happily gave him her backpack to search for it.
08:27Was only forgivable because this whole situation was caused by magic.
08:31To make a dramatic situation.
08:33So magic brainwashed him into being stupid to keep it like a soap opera.
08:37I could also headcanon that even if she tried to brainwash him into not arresting her.
08:45And tried to make everyone forget about all that.
08:47It wouldn't work.
08:49Because of the can of worms.
08:51But I should have been told that.
08:53It should have had the guy find her backpack himself when she was in the bathroom instead.
08:59But at least I enjoyed the conflict before that point.
09:03Something tells me that in a soap opera.
09:05Sabrina wouldn't have gotten her bracelet back without doing anything.
09:08Just because it fell over to her in a rushed anticlimax.
09:11When they could have had more time if they cut out the padding.
09:14Like any time future plot points got foreshadowed.
09:18If it's a soap opera.
09:20I'd expect Jenny to have actually gone to fire the super soaker at Libby.
09:24So her failure was disappointing.
09:26Why did she give up on doing that?
09:29She had no way of knowing that guy was a cop.
09:31Because he's not in a cop uniform for some reason.
09:33So I don't know what he is.
09:34Why is he out of school investigating a theft then?
09:37Sabrina ends up learning the lesson that Zelda already told her.
09:41But in dangerously vague terms for a witch.
09:44That you can make your own excitement to stop being bored.
09:47But just don't make your own excitement by making your life into a soap opera.
09:51It's another obvious lesson.
09:53But some people do turn their lives into soap operas because they're risk takers.
09:58Like by becoming alcoholics.
10:00But those people won't change just from seeing this episode anyways.
10:04I've never seen soap operas.
10:06But this has got to be the best written soap opera in history.
10:10Because the only time something happened that would never happen in real life.
10:14Is when that guy still didn't believe Sabrina that she was framed for stealing a ring.
10:18Even though she gladly gave him the backpack it was in.
10:20Despite her teacher saying that she doesn't need to be searched.
10:24Everything else.
10:26The only reason it needed magic to justify it was that Harvey and Jenny don't normally act like this.
10:31And only one time was someone insanely stupid.
10:35Which is also associated with soap operas.
10:38This almost makes me wish every episode of the show was like a soap opera in this way.
10:42Because it was constantly entertaining.
10:44And part of it is from the sheer variety of things going on in the story.
10:49I say almost because this show won't have the writing quality consistency to not suck when doing that.
10:55Already it was bullshit that Sabrina and her aunts couldn't instantly undo the can of worm effect by pointing.
11:01Or using another magical item.
11:03Why not have her aunts only show up at the end of the episode because it took too long to reach them.
11:08And then they instantly fix the problem.
11:10They didn't do anything important once they were there.
11:13Unless keeping Sabrina from injuring Libby counts.
11:16It really doesn't because witches can erase memory and heal injuries anyways.
11:20Anyways.
11:21.
11:22.
11:23.
11:24.
11:25.
11:26.
11:27.
11:29.
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