00:00Sabrina 90's show, Sabrina Gets Her License, Part 2.
00:05Hilda reveals that she had to go to the witch camp a long time ago because she didn't study either.
00:11Which is pretty unfaithful to the source materials version of Hilda, who really cared about witchcraft.
00:18That's mentioned being responsible.
00:21And I know that she's being portrayed as an arrowhead because they swapped the roles of Hilda and Zelda.
00:27That's not an excuse because Zelda wasn't exactly completely irresponsible or uninterested in witchcraft.
00:37The quiz master pushes Sabrina into the pit so she could use a parachute to go into the camp.
00:44And Zelda plans to get a lab and branch out from physics into chemistry.
00:49Obviously I always liked that she had a science hobby. It's interesting, relatable, and admirable.
00:53And it's certainly a great idea to have her branch out into chemistry because you can see chemicals.
01:01We had no reason to give a shit about her physics interest.
01:05Hilda says the dungeon's full, as if she couldn't just magically zap up a lab or ult through the dungeon.
01:12And why would the dungeon be full?
01:15Somehow Zelda just plans to buy one instead of zap one up and doesn't explain why.
01:20All of Sabrina's plot is worthless and has nothing to say about it other than the obvious.
01:27That it's just pointless cruelty from a sadistic writer who thinks the audience is just watching from either sadism or morbid curiosity.
01:36All just cliche boot camp stuff.
01:40Why would Sabrina even bother trying to convince the sergeant to let her go to her high school dance?
01:46It's really cringeworthy to watch this bullshit.
01:52The sergeant says ladies and says it doesn't sound as mean when they really are ladies.
01:57But he's been a sergeant for decades, so why would he bother?
02:02And somehow Sabrina tried to escape, even though Hilda already warned her that fleeing to Canada doesn't work.
02:08And she shouldn't have even tried to flee to Canada.
02:11Of course someone would just warp her back to the camp.
02:16And somehow, someone wastes time threatening Sabrina into staying here, even though she's one of the victims of all of this.
02:25So this would only make sense if she thought she was going to get rewarded for tattling on Sabrina.
02:30But Sabrina just has to tell her she's not allowed to leave the bed to get her to leave her alone.
02:38It was at least cool to see the lab unfold, as even Hilda pointed out.
02:43Since Sabrina's magic is deactivated by some things she's wearing, she has to climb the fence to leave herself.
02:50Since she couldn't use magic to warp home, she must have gotten home by finding a convenient portal home.
03:00That any escapee from boot camp could just walk into.
03:05Why would they even have that portal there?
03:08Salem says he'll pick the deactivator off.
03:11And Sabrina gets to go to the school and get a kiss from Harvey.
03:15He asks for the poster, and she has to go to the bathroom, and somehow she waits for someone.
03:21When she could just zap up the poster in a stall.
03:25She could also brainwash her into leaving the room.
03:28She wasn't paying attention to her.
03:30She could zap it up while not facing her.
03:34While facing the wall.
03:36As soon as she got told to go get a poster, it's been obvious from a mile away that she's not going to get to enjoy the dance with Harvey.
03:42Because of course she's going to get somehow bound out for escaping and get warped back to the camp.
03:49She can't just zap up a poster, god forbid.
03:52So she has to deal with the minor embarrassment of giving him a half-assed poster.
03:57At least he hardly reacts insultingly at all.
04:01Hilda spills some chemical, and the ants get warped to behind a driving celebrity.
04:05And Zelda thinks she has to say they're not keeping this car.
04:08Why does Harvey think he might step on Sabrina's toes if he danced with her?
04:14He danced with her well in a previous episode.
04:18She sees the sergeant in the disco ball yelling at her, and I guess only she can recognize that.
04:25There's no reason the person who threatened to get her in trouble would have told the sergeant she left.
04:31Because that would require her leaving her bed, which she wasn't allowed to do.
04:35And everyone had magic deactivators, so she couldn't tell him with magic.
04:41And she was able to sneak out because they were all going to bed for the night.
04:46Her dress gets turned into military pants, but only below the belt, so nobody notices.
04:50What's the point of writing this if you're not going to be as sadistic as possible?
04:56You know that the fans would hate it if you were too mean.
04:59But then why did you even be mean in the first place?
05:04Speaking of that, she has to deal with an abusive punishment.
05:08She's able to use magic to give a bully a toilet paper trail from her pants, so that's nice.
05:15The sergeant runs away from Hilda screaming before the ants pick Sabrina up.
05:20And somehow, Zilda has to tell Sabrina that she has to drop some of her activities to have the time to study magic.
05:29Somehow, the ants insist on her cutting back on Harvey and not any of the other many activities Sabrina told them about.
05:37Even though in the show, he's been the perfect boyfriend.
05:42This would have worked if he was actually faithful to the source material.
05:47Where he constantly broke stuff in her house by accident, and so Hilda hated him.
05:54Sabrina talks about a lot of the ways she disappointed Harvey recently.
05:58And thankfully, she's at least written to say that she's been a bad girlfriend and he deserves better.
06:03That is true.
06:05Then it wouldn't have been as frustrating that she broke up with him...
06:09If she made the decision herself to break up with him, instead of her aunt pressuring her into it.
06:16She has to have used magic to make it look like Harvey freaked out at being broken up with just to torture herself out of guilt.
06:24She's told by Salem to make a no-pain spell, so Harvey won't mind the reset button being pushed in the relationship just to kick the fans in the nuts for no reason.
06:33Why even write the break up, then, if the writer's gonna go easy on Harvey?
06:39And it wastes time showing Sabrina making the potion with the chemistry lab.
06:44At least it's creative to have potion making look like this.
06:48Somehow, Sabrina uses the wrong ingredient and gets warped next to the celebrity from earlier.
06:55It's such a waste of time.
06:57Sabrina brings Harvey some potion she lies as butterscotch pudding and he thanks her.
07:02The story wastes time with him briefly rejecting it just for him to agree to eat it.
07:07She breaks up with him and for no reason the story has him take a few seconds to get affected by the potion to torture us with him being upset about it.
07:16She should have known he wouldn't have been as upset if she had the common sense to tell him that her aunts are making her do this.
07:22She says he could ask someone else to go with him to a place, and he asks someone out in front of her,
07:28and she somehow thought he'd know she met someone in his family when she didn't say that.
07:33She would have said that.
07:36Harvey wouldn't have done this, because in the show, he's way nicer than this.
07:40This could only be justified by the potion keeping him from being in pain made him not care.
07:46A lot of the comedy in the show is just laugh at the dumb blonde for being written like a little girl.
07:53I heard about the actress not liking how she was directed to play the character,
07:57and I hope this kind of shit is why,
07:59because whoever decides to depict her like this had no respect for her,
08:03and there's no way they could have respected its fans at that rate.
08:07It'd be overly cynical to assume they didn't respect the source material.
08:10I mean, there's over 70 issues in that comic.
08:13There's no way everyone working on the show could have read all of them.
08:17But they definitely didn't respect the fans.
08:20I feel like the only reason they wrote Sabrina like this
08:23was because they're making her more relatable to teenage girls,
08:27and they have a very low opinion of teenage girls.
08:31Why does Sabrina give up on being the editor?
08:34The aunts didn't tell her to do that.
08:36Valerie gets to be the editor instead of Libby,
08:39so that's a relief.
08:41Salem quizzes Sabrina,
08:42who says when flying during a specific moon phase,
08:45she can have reduced visibility due to glare.
08:48Why the gibbiest moon specifically?
08:51Why not the full moon too,
08:52because it has the most light?
08:54There wasn't even a laugh track.
08:57The quiz master takes her to a crazy place,
09:01and tells her to show him the real Sabrina,
09:03and that wasn't in the handbook,
09:05which is dumb.
09:06How is she supposed to know what to show him then?
09:10Somehow, he's impressed by the random lazy color splotches
09:13that tell us nothing about her character.
09:17Somehow, she doesn't instantly figure out from his reaction that she passed.
09:21Why was she able to pass so easily when none of this has anything to do with anything she has to study?
09:28It makes sense that they'd make the test easy because they want people to have witchcraft
09:32because they're proud of being witches.
09:35Sabrina changes the colors of his outfit and sadly likes it,
09:39and Zelda hugs her.
09:41Zelda tells Sabrina she got a permit,
09:43and has to keep studying for a yearly license for magic until she's 18.
09:49She's already going to be learning about magic
09:52just because she's going through the events of the show,
09:55because she's constantly going to use magic
09:57and then have to figure out arbitrarily how to undo it
10:02in a way that's not just pointing again.
10:05And yet, somehow, none of that studying is going to prevent her
10:08from going through the magic problems later in the show.
10:12And if she doesn't get her license, she'll lose her powers.
10:16There's no way this would ever be the case.
10:19Witches would be proud of magic
10:20and want all of them to have access to it,
10:23since according to this show, the head witch likes when magic gets abused.
10:28When Cody and Bailey from Suite Life on Death
10:31broke up from forced drama,
10:34that's when I stopped watching the show.
10:36So a lot of people would have quit the show from this,
10:39and it's only the start of the second season.
10:42I don't know what the writer expected to accomplish by doing this
10:45when there's nothing bad about these two dating,
10:48and it hardly took up any time in the episodes.
10:51All that time was used for was brief, sweet moments between them.
10:56It'd be like breaking out of Antoine and Bunny.
10:59To be fair, depicting their relationship as insanely perfect
11:02was completely ignorant to the source material at best,
11:05where Harvey was more of a goofball, clumsy idiot
11:08who cheated on her occasionally,
11:10and that was his whole joke.
11:13I doubt they even knew about how he was supposed to be like,
11:15so that's not even why.
11:17Having him be the ideal boyfriend was actually nice to watch.
11:22What made the writer think breaking up the official couple of the series
11:26since the first comic for no reason was a good idea?
11:30Sabrina having to do extra studying for no reason
11:34just to have a season-long story arc for no reason
11:37that no one asked for when she's already become an expert at magic in most cases
11:41is so lame.
11:43When the conflict is both annoying and obviously fake
11:47because we know she's not going to lose her powers.
11:49I'm just wondering why she didn't have to do all this magic studying and tests
11:55in her first year of being a witch.
11:58Or she'd be the most dangerous!
12:00My point is, these blatantly worthless plot developments
12:04and the loss of Jenny are so discouraging
12:06that if I wasn't reviewing the show,
12:08I'd stop re-watching it from them.
12:11Harvey brings Sabrina a boot,
12:13and time's frozen.
12:14And the quizmaster says Harvey's here as a gift from him,
12:18which is out of character.
12:20I'm insulted that I'm expecting to forgive and like him.
12:24Because of this, Harvey does a slow dance with Sabrina
12:26as sappy romantic music plays.
12:29Sabrina could have brainwashed him into doing this herself.
12:32What's the point of this when they're still not dating anymore?
12:36Did the writer think the fans were so easily impressed
12:38that they'd forgive them for them being broken up insultingly arbitrarily
12:42just because of one dance Harvey won't remember?
12:46This story by Renee Phillips about Sabrina suffering through the cliché boot camp stuff,
12:52which is just sadistic,
12:53and then having a short dance with Harvey,
12:56and then having a magic test that anybody could pass without studying
13:00in a world where there even are magic tests and yearly licenses.
13:05But the test that got Sabrina sent to boot camp
13:07was something you needed to study to pass.
13:10So did two different people with completely different worldviews
13:13sign the two casts?
13:15Why did the writer think people would accept Sabrina breaking up with Harvey
13:18when she could have just cut down on a different thing she did?
13:23This episode sucks!
13:25This is supposed to be a comedy series!
13:27This is supposed to be a comedy show!
13:30Why was there just an episode that was nothing but dramatic and depressing?
13:34And it's time to reference!
13:37And it's pretty amazing just because it looks like the hair had to do
13:39and were actually an episode that was written by Russell
13:55who was like to tell us when Steve Pollack did getting Александ Spring
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