00:02Salem says his sense of smell tells him which type of chocolate Hilda's gonna eat, but he's wrong somehow.
00:10Zelda says it's sweet because she got chocolates from a mailman.
00:14Zelda uses a spell to separate the chocolates by their flavor, and while Sabrina appreciates it, Hilda whines that it ruins the mystery, even though she was just miserable about not using the spell.
00:25As for how she managed to do this when she didn't know which flavor was which herself, it was just magic scanning reality, because magic has an AI, so it figured out how to execute her order.
00:40Sabrina and Harvey count to three before exchanging cardboard hearts, which is sweet.
00:46Harvey says his valentine started out as big as hers, but he kept cutting it, and it kept getting smaller. Not that it matters, because she thinks it's cute.
00:55He says he likes that her face is symmetrical, and then he offers to walk her into the house to make sure she gets to the living room okay, which is sweet, because it's clearly just an excuse, and we know he's a nice guy.
01:07Sabrina takes the laptop away from Salem, because Harvey might see him pretend to be a woman on a chatroom for the attention.
01:15Sabrina snaps off food for Harvey. Salem says, like I don't have anything better to do than spy on her.
01:21Oh wait, I don't. I like that.
01:26Harvey opens up a book, and for some reason, sparks come out of it or something.
01:30Harvey's about to kiss her, and Salem jumps in between Harvey and her, saying no.
01:36They should have heard that obvious human voice.
01:39In a house that never has any men in it.
01:43So he should have been confused.
01:45For no reason, Salem doesn't tell Sabrina why she can't kiss Harvey.
01:51Instead of leaving it at, the sparks are a warning.
01:55Sabrina's smart enough to take him at his word, and lie that Salem's sick to get Harvey out.
02:01Why did it take so long for them to try to kiss each other, when they've been dating for several episodes?
02:06Why did Salem help her?
02:10He's totally selfish, usually.
02:13Why did Syl the Taken Soul now to tell Sabrina that when a witch kisses a mortal for the first time, he turns into a frog?
02:21Sabrina lampshades that sounds like a fairy tale.
02:24And that was his inspiration.
02:26Then don't write it if you know it's stupid.
02:29This would never be the case naturally.
02:32Witches would have gotten rid of that with a spell, even if they had to combine their powers for it.
02:36Why didn't these mortal haters just tell Sabrina to kiss some guy she doesn't care about to make him a frog first?
02:43They could erase her memory of that for your first kiss, so it wouldn't matter.
02:47Sabrina gets told that because she's a half-witch, there's somehow only a 50-50 chance.
02:52As far as what the show's shown, she functionally is a full witch the second she used her magic.
02:57She's never been shown to be incapable of something full witches are.
03:02We can only assume that she's got half as many magic points.
03:05Sabrina gets asked to go to the movies and asks Zelda what she should do.
03:10Zelda somehow thinks she's asking for a movie recommendation.
03:14It's so dumb of Sabrina to go to the movies with them anyways.
03:17Harvey compliments Sabrina's appearance twice, and Sabrina uses magic to splash him with popcorn.
03:25There's a joke at her expense because he asks her why she keeps flipping the coin.
03:30Harvey says the best part of watching the movie is seeing it with her, and she looks pretty tonight.
03:35Of course, Harvey confronts her on this eventually.
03:37It says that she doesn't have to explain, and if that's what she wants, they can just be friends.
03:42He says he really wants to kiss her.
03:45She kisses him, and says he's still here with a surprised tone.
03:49And he says he'll always be here before she turns him into a frog.
03:53Which you'd think would have happened instantly.
03:55Instead of her having instantly brought him back to normal like I expected,
03:59she brings Harvey into the house as Hilda's playing a scary violin tune.
04:03And Sabrina says,
04:05And you're not helping with that music.
04:07And I giggle.
04:08Hilda says there's a test to know whether it's true love,
04:13and somehow, if you fail the test, you turn into a frog.
04:18Which is why it was unacceptable for them to not warn her about this,
04:22and make her turn someone else into a frog.
04:25Like the frog thing, this completely misses the appeal of the series.
04:29It's not working as escapism if you think your life would suck if you were a witch.
04:34That doesn't make you feel better about your own life.
04:36Most of the time, you're still going to be focused on your own problems.
04:41How is the head witch the one who gives people the test of true love?
04:46Won't they be way too busy?
04:48There'd be so many witches!
04:50He'd be doing this 99% of the time!
04:54I guess there's more people doing this,
04:56and they just happen to luck out and get him.
04:58Sabrina walks into a quiz show, and now she's in a different outfit.
05:05And she's asked how well she knows Harvey.
05:07She's expected to ask questions to the three fake Harveys to get their answers,
05:11to see which one is like the real one.
05:14She lampshades how the question,
05:15what triangle are you, is supposed to tell you anything.
05:18The third, Harvey says symmetrical,
05:20so she knows which one it is,
05:22and her aunt showed her affection while cheering.
05:25Drell says she passed the test of friendship,
05:28and that true love can't exist without friendship.
05:31That's an excellent message to give.
05:33Even adults don't know that.
05:35Drell says they make him say that,
05:37which explains why he's saying something out of character.
05:40He tells Hilda he finally moved out of his parents' basement.
05:45Sabrina should know right away that the next test is about
05:47resisting the temptation of another attractive person who flirts with her.
05:51He zaps up a chocolate cake, and she says it looks amazing.
05:55When he says she looks pretty,
05:57she refuses to eat the cake,
05:58and that has her passed the test.
06:00It's really stupid that eating the cake makes you fail.
06:04Even someone loyal would still eat the cake.
06:07This is obviously just a test being rigged
06:09to make sure any witches that date mortals get turned into frogs.
06:14If witches let their bloodlines get too thin,
06:16their descendants would get weak.
06:19And it would be lame if the majority of witches
06:21were just extremely weak because of that.
06:25Drell opens something up,
06:26and sees their flames still burning after all this time.
06:30So they happily go to take the test.
06:33And Hilda fails the first one on the first question
06:35because she immediately says the one that flattered her is hers.
06:39And she refuses to leave, and he has to call security.
06:42To be fair, Hilda hasn't spent a lot of time with Drell lately,
06:45so they should have known she'd fail.
06:48It's so nice of the witches to let Sabrina pick which frog she wants to be.
06:53In the test of faith,
06:54Sabrina's supposed to walk across a rickety bridge
06:57with flames on the side of her while she feels hot.
07:00A part of the bridge falls,
07:01and the fake Harvey tells her it's not worth it.
07:04She jumps across it and hugs him happily.
07:06But this is a stupid test of faith,
07:09because it means you have to be willing to risk dying
07:11just for your love to get recognized as true.
07:14It's not unreasonable for someone to be too scared to do this
07:17and think it's smarter to pick a life as a frog
07:19over potentially dying.
07:21It acts like true love has to be self-destructive.
07:26Also, how do witches in wheelchairs or crutches complete the test?
07:29Well, they'd use magic to float over.
07:32But then there'd be no chance of failure,
07:34so it wouldn't be a leap of faith.
07:36So either the test would be so easy
07:38that it wouldn't really mean anything,
07:40or, if she can't use magic here at all,
07:43if you can't use magic here,
07:45then the test would be rigged against the disabled.
07:47So I have to hope witches have a magical way to cure them.
07:51Because logically, they would just cure any injuries they have.
07:55With the logic for why witches are put through this test,
07:58logically, every time they get new boyfriends that are mortals,
08:04they'd have to go through these tests.
08:06This wouldn't just be a first boyfriend thing.
08:09You wouldn't want to watch this again,
08:11and it is supposed to be a comedy,
08:13so it's good meta-wise that it inexplicably never happens again.
08:18She hugs Zelda, and she says that's wonderful.
08:21Sabrina says now she can chant to the world
08:23that she has a true love.
08:26It's so nice to see how happy she is,
08:28and there's another nonsense rule
08:30that would only exist because of a curse
08:32where she has to kiss the mortal
08:33in the exact same place she did before
08:35to avert him to normal.
08:37But what if the kiss happens in a place
08:39where everything around them looks the same?
08:42What if the witch has a terrible memory?
08:45Them kissing in the same spot would be a lot harder.
08:48I think that was by design.
08:51Harvey doesn't remember being a frog and agrees to kiss her again.
08:55It's relatable of him to say he was nervous the first time.
08:59It's nice of Zelda to hold Salem,
09:01especially since she knows he used to be a human.
09:04So it's kind of weird that she wants to do this with him
09:07when he's not even her family member,
09:09and they're not even good friends.
09:13Zelda says she knew Sabrina would have to take the test,
09:16and she knew she'd pass
09:17because at 16, it's always true love.
09:20She's called out,
09:21why didn't you tell her?
09:24And gets told that because now she thinks it's extra special
09:27as she kisses him again.
09:28And for no reason,
09:31he walks like a frog the next day,
09:33even though it's been a while since he was a frog.
09:36And he didn't really get to do any walking as a frog.
09:40He was just held still the whole time.
09:42This annoying episode was by
09:44Carrie Honigblum and Renee Phillips,
09:48and was about missing the point of escapism again
09:51by showing that if a witch kisses a mortal for the first time,
09:54he turns into a frog.
09:56I like that to save him,
09:57she had to go through a test of how well she knows him as a friend,
10:01a test of loyalty,
10:02and a test of faith,
10:03because it gives you an accurate message about what makes true love.
10:08And this kind of message is something even adults haven't learned.
10:11But the second test wasn't fair.
10:14Eating food offered to you by someone into you
10:16isn't the same thing as cheating.
10:18And it's not like Harvey saw this and knew what was going on,
10:21so it won't hurt his feelings if she agreed.
10:24So I would have failed.
10:25It's also not fair that you have to go to the exact place you first kissed him
10:31to turn it back to normal.
10:33Because you might not remember exactly what that is.
10:37But that was all probably by design,
10:39because the upper witches don't want witches dating mortals.
10:43So it only feels like bad writing because it wasn't called out.
10:47And if your only choices are either get turned into a frog
10:51or make a leap of faith and risk not having to be a frog for life,
10:55that's not a test of faith,
10:57but bravery and confidence,
10:59which not everyone love has.
11:02Why do you need faith to think that you'd succeed
11:04if you did a leap of faith in what you got told was a test of faith?
11:08When she got to the test of love,
11:11because I had witches there
11:12and he's just amused about the whole situation,
11:14and she got to pick which frog she'd be.
11:17By the second test,
11:17I started to realize the frog transformation made sense,
11:20but it only feels like cursed by the witch's council
11:22to punish witches for dating mortals.
11:25There's no way it'd be the case naturally.
11:28Even magic has logic.
11:29There's always specific, consistent ways to make it happen,
11:33and you're only a witch because of the action of other ones.
11:37It's not like every so often there's a 50-50 chance
11:39that pointing won't work.
11:41So it is believable that this happens.
11:44It's just that the price of having a believable world
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