The Bernie Mac Show is a beloved comedy series that showcases Bernie Mac’s unique humor, sharp wit, and unforgettable storytelling 😂🔥 When Bernie and his wife take in his sister’s three children, everyday family life turns into hilarious chaos. Packed with heart, laughs, and life lessons, this sitcom remains a fan favorite and a television classic.
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#berniemacshow #berniemac #sitcom #comedy #classiccomedy #comedygold #familycomedy #tvseries #funnyclips #tvclassics #cultclassic #comedymoments #throwbacktv #2000stv #entertainment #retroshows #iconicshows #viralvideo #fyp #explorepage #nostalgia #television #comedyshow #legendarycomedy #dailymotion #mustwatchtv #classicseries #laughoutloud #familysitcom #tvlegend
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FunTranscript
00:17Hey, you see, Thanksgiving's a time for sharing and a time for family, but most importantly,
00:23it's a time for turkey.
00:25That's right.
00:26And Bernie Mac is what you call a turkey file.
00:28From the Greek, that's a love of flightless birds.
00:34Yeah, but anyway, but on Thanksgiving, I'm presented with a problem.
00:38Not enough turkey for Bernie Mac.
00:40And see, those kids, they eat like a scooter piranha.
00:43They can skeletonize the bird before I can even pour the gravy on it.
00:46But this Thanksgiving, I have the perfect solution.
00:53Big Mac.
00:54That's his name.
01:01You're going to eat that whole turkey by yourself?
01:04Baby, I wasn't planning on it, but I bet nobody else eat it.
01:06That's my personal turkey.
01:08Baby, isn't Thanksgiving about sharing?
01:12Well, it's possible.
01:15But the only reason the Pilgrims was willing to share with the Indians is because it was
01:18casein' the joy.
01:20Take it from me, someday we all be free.
01:28All down her back, back, back, she left her back.
01:31Take it from me, someday we all be free.
01:37Ellen, Ellen, Ellen.
01:38Jump the fence, fence, fence.
01:41They jump so high.
01:42Take it from me, someday we'll be free.
01:55With silver buttons, buttons, buttons All down her back, back, back
02:00All dressed in black, black, black With silver buttons, buttons, buttons
02:05All down her back, back, back She has her mother, mother, mother
02:10For fifty cents, cents, cents To see the elves, elves, elves
02:15Jump the fence, cents, cents They jumped so high, high, high
02:20They never came back, back, back, back One, two, a, five, five, six
02:25Miss Mary the...
02:27Oh, my God!
02:29Oh, my God!
02:31Oh, my God!
02:33Give it back! It's mine! Give it back!
02:44Hey, hey! Boy, you better get away from my personal turkey
02:51Damn savages
02:53Round of it
03:03Oh, thank you, Gordon
03:04Mmm
03:05Ugh, watching you eat was the most disgusting thing I've ever seen
03:09The most disgusting thing I've ever seen was sitting over here watching your brother eat with no drawers on
03:14Hey, I'm just keeping it real
03:16Keeping it real nasty, too
03:23Oh, honey, that's not sexy. Won't you put that thing away?
03:27Babe, I'm about to put away some pie. That's what I'm put away
03:30Hey, hey, hey, hey
03:32All right
03:35Uncle Brent, your tummy sound loud
03:37It's a sound of satisfaction, baby girl
03:39That's all it is
03:54All right
03:56Yaw, heart
03:57Oh, Lord
03:59Oh, Lord
04:03Oh, something not said right
04:11I bet it was my baby pot.
04:15Oh, America.
04:18This isn't good.
04:20It's like I've been awakened by some ancient evil,
04:23an intestinal demon.
04:26There's not no sweet potato pain.
04:28I think it was my turkey.
04:31That bird must have been rotten when I bought it,
04:34because I know I was careful.
04:37Besides, I've been cooking turkey before J.J.
04:39I didn't call him Jive.
04:41Had to be a bad bird.
04:47Unless...
04:49Hey, boys, can you pull up frame 819-25?
04:53Pull it up for me.
05:01Hey, hey, boy, you better get away from my personal turkey.
05:10Hulu?
05:11Yeah.
05:13That's it.
05:14Yeah.
05:18Now we getting somewhere.
05:20Now magnify right quadrant.
05:23Mm-hmm.
05:25Yeah.
05:27Uh-huh.
05:29Uh-huh.
05:29Uh-huh.
05:31Sabotage.
05:33Skunks.
05:37Skunks.
05:46Skunks.
05:49Oh.
05:50I'm sorry, America.
05:52I was hoping I'd feel no better, but it's gotten worse.
05:56I'll spend the better part of the day just to give it back,
05:59if you know what I mean.
06:01But I'd kill those kids if I wasn't so sick.
06:04But I can't even move.
06:06This is supposed to be a day of fame.
06:09If no kids would leave me alone just to watch football,
06:11I'd be mighty grateful.
06:14Mighty grateful.
06:29I just got to close my eyes just for a few minutes.
06:44What would you think you're doing?
06:46I'm watching cartoons.
06:48You sure are, boo.
06:49First you messed with my turkey, now you messed with my football.
06:52I didn't mess with your turkey.
06:53You did mess with my turkey.
06:54I saw you, cheap little bear ass.
06:57Now for the rest of the holiday, you and the rest of the kids,
06:58I don't want to be bothered with you.
06:59You understand?
07:00Matter fact, go and get on out of here.
07:06Playing with y'all.
07:22What the?
07:25Jordan!
07:26Jordan!
07:28Jordan!
07:29Jordan!
07:30I know you.
07:31Where are you, Jordan?
07:32In here.
07:33Jordan?
07:35What you doing in there, boy?
07:39Jordan!
07:41You come out of there.
07:43I guess you have to watch cartoons now.
07:45Boy, you better get me.
07:52Hey!
07:52I'm in cartoon land.
07:54Ha-ha!
07:56Got you!
08:10Look at that, America.
08:12Good as new.
08:13That didn't bother him a bit.
08:14And why should it?
08:15It's cartoon violence.
08:17And cartoon violence never hurt nobody.
08:20It just makes people laugh.
08:21Well, would you like me to make you laugh, America?
08:24Come join me.
08:34Shh.
08:35Now be very, very quiet.
08:37I'm hunting jive turkey.
08:40Where's that jive turkey?
08:42Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
08:45Ha-ha!
08:46Whoa!
08:47Yeah!
08:49Oh, Lord!
08:49What?
08:51Time to prepare my Thanksgiving feast.
08:54Ha-ha-ha-ha!
08:59Mmm!
09:00You look good enough to eat.
09:01Time to put you in the oven.
09:05Oops!
09:05I almost forgot to clean out the giblets.
09:10We'll keep these for later.
09:12They'll make tasty gravy.
09:14All right.
09:15In you go.
09:19Boop-boop-boop-boop-boop-boop-boop-boop-boop.
09:21Ah!
09:22It's done.
09:24Now it's time to call the bird.
09:28Come back here!
09:30I'm gonna bust your head to those white meat shows
09:33and serve it up with gravy!
09:34Ow!
09:37Ow!
09:39Ow!
09:40Ow!
09:41Ow!
09:47I can't kill him enough!
09:49He's indestructible!
09:51Time for you to face the music, Uncle Bernie!
09:59Say hi to my golden thing!
10:03Oh!
10:05Oh!
10:08Oh!
10:12Oh...
10:16Oh...
10:17Your ass is Play-Doh!
10:18And I'm the fun factor!
10:21Uh-oh.
10:21Gotta go!
10:24You know, Uncle Bernie, I'm sick of cartoons.
10:27You can watch football now.
10:29No, no, no.
10:30Don't you dare, boy.
10:31Don't you dare change that.
10:33Bernie Mac fields the ball at the 21-yard line.
10:36Look.
10:37No!
10:40Yeah!
10:45What the?
10:52Doggone kids.
10:55Oh, Lord.
10:56I'm having nightmares and fever dreams.
10:59It's bad enough those kids ruined my Thanksgiving.
11:02Now they haunt me in my dreams.
11:04They're killing me.
11:05Cut the camera off.
11:07This might get ugly.
11:13Down here, man.
11:16I couldn't even make it up to my chair.
11:20You know why?
11:21It's too high.
11:23These fever dreams got me weak.
11:26My husband's just as well.
11:28I'd rather be lying here than be a rattled dog on kids.
11:31They ruined my Thanksgiving.
11:34Well, just leave me be.
11:36When you come back, when I'm still down here,
11:40you call 911.
11:43But be sure to specify an ambulance.
11:46Because you know the police come out here,
11:48brother, tonight's house.
11:50I just don't have the energy.
11:53I need money.
11:54I need silence.
11:55Nessa, just leave me alone.
11:57But I want to go to the mall with Shannon.
11:59I want my stomach to stop doing the lecture slide.
12:02You should have asked me for forgetting for messing up my turkey.
12:04What are you talking about?
12:06Don't talk back, Nessa.
12:07Just leave me alone.
12:11Let me make this perfectly clear.
12:14If I was president, I'll make it a law.
12:17Then Thanksgiving be spent away from kids.
12:21Somewhere tropical.
12:22Just me and Wanda, lying on the beach,
12:27playing Pocahontas all day long.
12:30Mm-hmm.
12:32Nice.
12:33Real nice.
12:53Hey, baby, just think, in a few hours, we'll be a thousand miles away from all the kids.
12:59And no crying and no talking about it.
13:03I can't even wait to snuggle up with my baby on a nice, warm beach.
13:09Hey, Wanda.
13:10Mm-hmm?
13:11Happy Thanksgiving.
13:12Happy Thanksgiving.
13:19Happy Thanksgiving.
13:22Whew.
13:41One, one.
13:42What is it?
13:43What is it?
13:43Quick, quick, quick.
13:43Look, look, look.
13:45What?
13:51Let's go back to sleep, baby.
14:11Hello?
14:12Uncle Bernie.
14:13Nessa?
14:14You should have given me the money.
14:15Where are you?
14:16Look out your window.
14:17All I wanted to do was go to the mall.
14:19That's all I wanted to do.
14:29Lord, let her be.
14:30That's not Nessa.
14:31Let her be back in L.A.
14:33Father, please, I ask you these things in Christ's name, L.A., please.
14:39Wanda, Wanda, what's going on?
14:41Wanda, Nessa here on the wing.
14:42She on the wing.
14:43Aw, come on, baby.
14:44No, no, no, no, no, I'm serious, baby.
14:46That's out here on the wing.
14:48Oh, right.
14:48That's where I booked her seat.
14:50See if she wants some headphones.
14:53All right, I'm just going crazy, right?
15:02Don't go, don't go.
15:03I gotta pee.
15:08I know I'm not crazy, America.
15:10I know what I saw, and you saw it too.
15:14Right?
15:37I swear to you, baby, Nessa, she was out there on the wing.
15:39Baby, baby, you gotta believe me.
15:40You know, listen, she knows she don't like me.
15:42She's trying to take us down, baby.
15:44You're acting like Luna did, okay?
15:45No, no, there is nothing out there.
15:47No, no, no, no, no, it is, Wanda.
15:49Listen to what I'm saying.
15:50Every time you look, she's trying to make me look like she's trying to fool you.
15:52She quit.
15:53She quit.
15:54When you look, she quit.
15:55I'm telling you, it's some trickeration.
15:57Okay, okay, okay.
15:59Baby?
15:59What?
15:59Okay.
16:00Just think about the beach, okay?
16:04Nice, warm beach, okay?
16:06All right, there you go.
16:08There you go.
16:08Now, let me give you a little nice back rub, okay?
16:11Just relax a little bit.
16:13No, no, no, no, I'm going up there.
16:14I'm going to tell the pilot.
16:15I'm going to tell her that she's on the wing.
16:17Maybe you can make a couple of sharp turns.
16:19Dip it.
16:19Flip off.
16:20Let me out, let me out.
16:21No, no, hold on, hold on, okay?
16:23I'll go talk to them.
16:24Good, good.
16:25You're a little too worked out.
16:26You, you can do that.
16:27I'll keep my eye on them.
16:28Okay.
16:28You hurry up.
16:29I will.
16:29All right.
16:30Oh, excuse me.
16:31Sorry, sorry, sorry.
16:32Excuse me.
16:33Yeah, we got your hand.
16:41Get off that wing.
16:43Ah, don't do that.
16:47No, you know better than that.
16:54Yeah, I'm kidding.
16:56I'm coming out there.
16:57I'm coming out there.
16:58Yeah, I'm coming out there.
17:00Y'all nobody believe me.
17:01I'm going to catch you.
17:01But when I catch you, y'all going to be kissing my ass.
17:04Y'all going to get up.
17:08No.
17:18Think about what you're doing.
17:20Think about what you're doing.
17:21If anything happens to me, who am I going to take care of you, huh?
17:25Okay, now, all right, listen, listen.
17:29You want to go to the mall?
17:30I'm coming out there.
17:30I'm coming out there.
17:31Okay?
17:32I got somebody for you.
17:34Okay?
17:35Okay?
17:37Wait a minute.
17:38Wait a minute.
17:39Wait a minute.
17:40Wait a minute.
17:40Wait a minute.
17:42Wait a minute.
17:45Wait a minute.
18:02Wait a minute.
18:09Hey.
18:10Hey, kids.
18:11Look what I got.
18:12I figured we'd have some fun on Thanksgiving.
18:15What do you say?
18:17What's the matter?
18:18Why are you all so quiet?
18:19Because you didn't feel well.
18:23Well, you all are really something else.
18:26If I didn't know any better, I'd swear you all was kidnapped and replaced by alien replicants.
18:31He knows.
18:35Secure him.
18:37What you talking about?
18:38Yes, my queen.
18:41What you talking about?
18:42Let me get the probe.
18:46What did you get in your head, boy?
18:48Put him over the sink.
18:50What's wrong?
18:51What's that?
18:52What's that?
18:56I don't know, America.
18:58Maybe these nightmares are trying to tell me something, but about what?
19:02In every single one, those kids torture me and kill me.
19:06Now, I don't believe in premonition, but those kids might be truly trying to do me in.
19:10And maybe I should kill them first while I still have a chance.
19:15I need some clarity, America.
19:17Someone call a dreamologist.
19:19See, that's the study of dreams.
19:23This whole thing started to make me sick all over again.
19:30Mm-mm-mm.
19:34Oh, Lord.
19:36Can a man find some peace around here, please?
19:40Uncle Bernie, I'm sorry you got sick on Thanksgiving.
19:44Oh, sweetheart.
19:46Thank you, baby girl.
19:48And I taped the fucking football game free when you were throwing up.
19:52You're gonna love it.
19:52The Bears went in double overtime.
19:54You don't have to tell me all that.
19:56But thank you, my man.
19:58And I saved you this piece of sweet potato pie for when you feel better.
20:07Thank you, kids.
20:09You are the greatest.
20:12You know what, America?
20:14Those kids didn't ruin my day.
20:16Yeah, they might have messed with my personal turkey.
20:19But those kids get it.
20:21Thanksgiving is about family.
20:23And I can't believe it.
20:24But all of a sudden, I'm feeling good.
20:27I'm full of the Thanksgiving spirit.
20:30Magnanimous.
20:31And what am I doing talking to you, America?
20:34I need to be with my family right now.
20:36And you should be with yours.
20:38So, America, will you excuse me?
20:45What?
20:47What?
20:47What?
20:48What?
20:48What?
20:48Come here.
20:49Come here.
20:49Come here.
20:49Look.
20:50Look.
20:50Look at that.
20:57Baby, are you okay?
21:00Yes, I'm okay.
21:01I told you.
21:02You didn't even believe me either.
21:03And all y'all gonna be kissing my ass with some damage to the engine.
21:06I gotta go tell the pilot.
21:07Look out.
21:10Hey, Captain.
21:11You gotta land the plane, man.
21:12The engine's in bad shape.
21:14Look!
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