- 11 hours ago
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00:03so I'm driving my car the other night and what do you think happens I crashed into a utility pole
00:12then to add insult to injury I was electrocuted what can I say it was one of those days
00:23all my neighbors heard it happen so they quickly left their microwaved burritos
00:29and their expensive jars of moisturizer and their racy pay-per-view movies and they hurried outside
00:39excited to see what all the ruckus was about but then when they saw it was me this weird thing
00:46happened for a moment no one moved or said anything they just stared and then oh my god
00:57all hell broke loose does anybody know CPR there's been an accident can you hear me yes everyone
01:07suddenly became very concerned which was touching but ultimately pointless
01:15moments before the ambulance finally arrived I heard someone whisper don't worry you're gonna get
01:22through this you're gonna be just fine Susan Meyer wrong again two seconds later it happened with all my
01:33neighbors surrounding me I took my last breath the good news I died just like I lived as the complete
01:43an utter center of attention
01:48two days after I kicked the proverbial bucket my husband asked my neighbors to do me a favor
01:55you could tell from the looks on their faces it wasn't something they wanted to do but they agreed to
02:03do it anyway
02:04so the next day they piled into a car with two thermoses filled with coffee a basket filled with baked
02:12goods and an urn that was filled with me
02:22I hate that we have to do this so you said I mean it really is the kind of thing
02:26a relative should do maybe it is but we're in the car on our way there so stop your bitching
02:31well can you at least put the radio on I won't feel like bitching if I can sing along to
02:36something
02:36if you start singing I'll start bitching you don't want that it's a four hour drive we have to do
02:41something to pass the time
02:42here's a thought why don't we talk about Edie
02:45then say what I don't know but she is the reason we're on this trip maybe we could share memories
02:51or tell stories
02:52hmm why don't you start with the time she tried to steal your comatose boyfriend
02:56that was fun okay I was thinking of stories that put Edie in a positive light
03:01and after that five minutes is up then what do we do
03:03the woman is dead people let's honor her memory
03:08well I'm all for saying a few nice things
03:12you were never really friends you and Edie clashed right from the start
03:17yeah
03:19that's what everybody thinks
03:22but the first time we met seemed like we'd end up being the best of friends
03:37oh that's disgusting
03:39no it's okay
03:40it landed on the detergent box
03:43here
03:44you go buy yourself a fresh donut or booze
03:46crack whatever eases the pain just move it along
03:50don't you think I'm homeless
03:52oh no no no
03:53no I live here
03:56I can prove it
03:58I know exactly what's in this garbage bag
04:00um empty carton of eggs
04:01coffee grinds
04:03shampoo bottle
04:04wart removal cream
04:08you're right
04:09I'm homeless
04:12Susan Meyer
04:16it's all cleared up
04:19Edie Britt I just moved in down the street
04:21oh yeah I saw the moving van welcome
04:24thanks
04:24so is it just you or do you have a family
04:27I have a son
04:28he lives with his dad
04:30that's a long story I'll tell you one day over a margarita
04:34you want to invite me in for margarita
04:37how about coffee
04:38I just put on a pot
04:40great
04:41you can fill me in on all of the neighborhood gossip
04:43starting with the redhead across the street with a muffin basket
04:46that's a robot right
04:48funny and likes to gossip
04:50we're going to get along just fine
04:51yes we are
04:55wait
04:56stop
04:57could we just rest for a second
05:00we've only gone four blocks
05:04okay
05:05I lied
05:05I hate running
05:07well why didn't you say something
05:08we've been doing this for a week
05:10because we were starting to become friends
05:12and you like to run
05:13and I like to
05:15sit
05:15and
05:16one of us had to give
05:17hi Susan
05:19oh hi Helen
05:20Ed
05:21I would have introduced you
05:22but once Helen starts talking
05:23she doesn't shut up
05:24right
05:25Ed told me that
05:26oh
05:27you met Ed
05:28oh yeah
05:29gotten to know him
05:30quite well
05:31yeah
05:32we're kind of
05:34doing it
05:36doing what
05:38Ed
05:40Ed is married
05:42yeah
05:43I'm a naughty girl
05:46now you're being immoral
05:48you're committing adultery
05:50actually Ed's committing adultery
05:52I'm just getting laid
05:55you know
05:55forget I ever mentioned it
05:57I can't forget something like this
05:59Helen is my very good friend
06:00I thought you just said that she was
06:01she is annoying
06:02and I hide when she knocks on my door
06:04but she does not deserve for you to be wrecking her marriage
06:08where are you going?
06:09home
06:11oh so you're not going to be my friend anymore?
06:13I don't think so
06:16I thought you didn't like running
06:18well it depends on what I'm running away from
06:25hi I'm the whore that lives down the street
06:27could I borrow a cup of condoms?
06:28a cup?
06:29are you sure that'll be enough?
06:31look I know that you don't like me
06:33but I am here to do you a favor anyway
06:37I was out to dinner last night
06:39and I saw your husband with another woman
06:41really?
06:42I feel bad saying it
06:44but
06:45if I were in your shoes
06:46I would want to know
06:48you're welcome
06:50oh I get it
06:52so you feel I judged you
06:54and for revenge
06:56you're trying to make me insecure about my marriage
06:58if I wanted revenge
07:00I would have joined them
07:00and had a threesome
07:02you know Carl would never cheat
07:04and the woman he was with
07:06Brandy
07:07his secretary
07:08and he took her out for her birthday
07:10oh the old
07:11I'm taking my secretary out
07:12for her birthday routine
07:15nice tip of the hat to the classics
07:18okay well since you're on this moral roll
07:20why don't we walk over to Helen's
07:21and I will introduce you
07:23we can have some tea
07:24and then you two could swap stories
07:25about Ed's favorite positions
07:27what I do
07:28and what Brandy's doing
07:29is completely different
07:31how?
07:32I'm not looking to break up anyone's marriage
07:35I'm in it for a little fun
07:36some free meals
07:37and to help an unhappy man
07:38through his midlife crisis
07:41wow
07:42you're just a giver
07:45fine
07:46use all of your energy
07:47judging me
07:48and ignore the real problem
07:50but let me tell you something
07:52this is my area of expertise
07:53and I saw the look
07:55in that woman's eyes
07:56she's not in it
07:57for the free meals
07:58she's in it for keeps
08:03you should leave now
08:05you know Susan
08:07I'm trying to help my neighbor out
08:08I thought it was the moral thing to do
08:17three weeks later
08:18I found Brandy's bra
08:19in Carl's glove compartment
08:20and well you know the rest
08:21say what you want about Edie
08:23she really understood men
08:25I should hope so
08:26after all those years of research
08:29I can't help thinking
08:31about all the times
08:31Edie and I sniped at each other
08:35we could have been good friends
08:37well if she knew
08:38what you're about to do for her
08:39she'd forgive you for everything
08:50okay my hour's up
08:51someone else hold Edie now
08:52I'll take her
08:59kind of looks like cat litter
09:01Lynette don't look at Edie
09:03or what I'll turn to stone
09:05she's all rough and gritty
09:07uh Cappy before we learn
09:08what Edie tastes like
09:09I got it
09:11I think a little more reverence
09:12for the dead is in order
09:13oh please
09:14we're talking about Edie
09:15a little more irreverence
09:16is what we need
09:18give it
09:26do you guys remember
09:27when you took turns
09:28driving me to chemo
09:31well none of you did it
09:32like Edie
09:35hey Lynette
09:37hey
09:37how you feeling
09:39eh
09:39same
09:41here's the DVD
09:42you asked for
09:42thanks
09:43I'll watch it during chemo
09:45if I'm not too tired
09:46here we go
09:48oh hi Edie
09:49hi
09:50ugh
09:51what is that
09:52it's a health shake
09:53of fermented brown rice
09:55and for her entree
09:56a salad of radish
09:57burdock root
09:58and bok choy
09:59hmm
09:59what's for dessert
10:00waterboarding
10:02thanks
10:03I
10:04can't get comfortable
10:05could you
10:05fluff my pillows
10:06of course
10:09well
10:09I've got errands to run
10:10and I'll be back
10:11to drive you to chemo
10:12before you go
10:13why don't you put
10:13my socks back on
10:14my feet are cold again
10:17oh of course
10:20Catherine
10:20you have got stuff to do
10:22why don't I take her to chemo
10:24it's fine
10:27okay
10:28see you tomorrow then
10:29bye
10:34okay
10:34where's your coat
10:36why
10:36chemo's not until five
10:38yeah
10:38I've got to make a little
10:39stop on the way
10:50been here before
10:51couple of times
10:52you're gonna love it
10:53hey
10:53love it
10:54I have cancer
10:55I probably shouldn't even use
10:57the ladies room in this place
10:58oh there isn't a ladies room
10:59so that's not a problem
11:00um
11:01I
11:03Edie
11:03I have chemo in half an hour
11:05fine
11:05then we better start drinking
11:06I'm not supposed to drink
11:08and they're not supposed to do tattoos
11:10in the kitchen
11:11but I have a bald eagle on my ass
11:12that says otherwise
11:13two tequila shooters
11:15hey
11:16Edie
11:17Reggie
11:18oh I thought you were in Florida
11:20nah
11:20it was just a body
11:21they identified as me
11:22oh
11:24Reggie
11:24this is my friend Lynette
11:26I'm trying to cheer up
11:27right on
11:28you want to shoot some stick
11:30uh
11:31no thanks
11:32oh come on
11:33you can totally take him
11:34no I can't
11:36uh
11:36see
11:37cancer
11:39no sweat
11:45I'll play you one handed
11:48can you excuse us for one second
11:51I need to go to chemo
11:54I have
11:55cancer
11:56yeah
11:56I heard
11:59and what do you want from me
12:01I want you to fluff your own pillows
12:04you need to start fighting this thing
12:06I'm doing the best I can
12:07oh
12:08not even close
12:09Helenette
12:10you
12:10you are the strongest person I know
12:12you're even stronger than me
12:14and that's saying something
12:19now
12:21I may be a little out of line
12:22bringing you here
12:24but you need to remember who you are
12:27screw cancer
12:28you are
12:29Lynette Scabo
12:36two tequilas
12:51now
12:52where's that
12:53one armed friend of yours
12:56I want to shoot some stick
13:06wow it sounds like she gave you just what you needed
13:08good for Edie
13:09she never let me forget it either
13:11she always insisted it was the tequila shooters that killed the cancer
13:14oh
13:16what the hell is that
13:17oh not now
13:18we have a flap
13:19maybe it's a sign we're not supposed to do this today
13:21nice try
13:27we don't have time for this
13:29anybody know how to change a tire
13:42you want to hand me that cross wrench
13:44you want to tell me what that is
13:45it's the T-shaped deal I'm going to whack you with if you don't hand it over
13:50you know Edie used to live around here when she moved away from Wisteria Lane
13:55you mean when you gals gave her the boot
13:56less yakking more jacking
13:58Brie how did you know where she lived
14:00um I ran into her once
14:03unexpectedly
14:05in a place I never thought I'd be
14:07Brie Hodge
14:11follow me
14:11I'll get you situated and I'll bring your husband in
14:25is that the visitor's room
14:27yeah why
14:28you don't happen to have a private room do you
14:34you mean like an upgrade
14:35something with a couch and softer lighting
14:38that would be lovely
14:42oh you were being sarcastic
14:44yes ma'am
14:45are you ready to
14:46oh not just yet
14:49it's not a bad idea having an upgrade available
14:52I bet that's a perk people would be willing to pay for
14:56ma'am it's a prison
14:57the only perk we offer is a cavity search
15:01um
15:03to be honest I'm not feeling up to this
15:05I'm going to have to come back another day
15:07fine
15:08he's got another visitor scheduled anyway
15:10so I don't even have to tell him you were here
15:11another visitor?
15:12who?
15:13some lady
15:13she visits him every week
15:15every week?
15:16what's her name?
15:17I can't give you that
15:19if she's visiting my husband
15:21I think I have a right to know
15:22ma'am I'm sorry but I cannot give you her name
15:25really?
15:28because I would consider that
15:30a perk worth paying for
15:38well well
15:40what are you doing here?
15:42I wanted to see you
15:45and you didn't bring muffins?
15:48it isn't that kind of visit
15:54no muffins?
15:55no small talk
15:57should I be scared or grateful?
16:01I stopped by the prison today
16:02the guard tells me you've been visiting Orson
16:05sometimes twice a week
16:07she said
16:08who knew lady prison guards could be so chatty?
16:11what are you up to, Edie?
16:12I'm not up to anything, you red-headed ice cube
16:15he's 15 minutes away
16:17and quite frankly
16:18I feel sorry for him
16:20after all I know what it's like
16:21to be exiled from suburbia
16:24so you're not
16:26trying to start up something
16:29he's in jail
16:31my boobs are impressive
16:32but they can't bend iron bars
16:35well
16:36thank you for
16:38checking in on him
16:40and
16:40for answering my question
16:45I have a question
16:48why aren't you visiting him?
16:51oh well
16:51my
16:52schedule is just unreal
16:53what with the catering company
16:55and looking after Benjamin
16:56yeah well
16:56we're all busy
16:59come on
17:00why haven't you been to see him?
17:07that jail
17:09it's
17:10it's
17:10disgusting
17:12those men
17:13in cages
17:14like
17:15animals
17:18even to step foot
17:19in that place
17:19is humiliating
17:22that man
17:22went to jail
17:23for you
17:24do you have any idea
17:26how much he must
17:26love you?
17:29I do
17:31then why can't you
17:32suck it up
17:33once a month
17:33and go and say hi
17:35try to help him
17:36get through this
17:37living nightmare
17:39why can't you do that?
17:45as I think about it
17:48don't visit him
17:50he can do so much
17:51better than you
17:55do
18:02do
18:09you
18:20fine
18:21and
18:21damn
18:21So, how are you doing?
18:25How do you think?
18:30You're right, I shouldn't have asked.
18:32I know, it's a horrible year.
18:36How would you know?
18:37You've never been.
18:40You have every right to hate me.
18:45There's no need to be melodramatic.
18:48I meant for asking you to come here,
18:50for insisting you turn yourself in.
18:54Now that I see this place,
18:55I don't know what I was thinking.
18:58You were thinking I needed to take responsibility
19:00for what I did, and you were right.
19:02I'm still asking you to make this sacrifice
19:04and not ever coming to see you.
19:16How can you ever forgive me?
19:21Just be there when I get out.
19:36I never told you about that because
19:39I was embarrassed.
19:40Yeah.
19:4180 Brits shamed you into being a better human being.
19:43that is embarrassing.
19:46All right, ladies, we're ready to ride.
19:48Good.
19:48We got some ground to make up.
19:50I was hoping we'd be able to get there before dark.
19:52How do you think he'll react when we tell him?
19:54How do you think?
20:02I never thought Edie would be cremated.
20:04I figured she'd want to be plumpful of chemicals
20:06and preserved.
20:08Isn't that what she did for the last 15 years?
20:11My theory?
20:12Edie knew if she was buried,
20:13her true date of birth would be carved
20:15into a tombstone for all the world to see.
20:17You really think she spent a lot of time
20:19thinking about her death?
20:22Yeah, I do.
20:25I spent a night with her
20:26right after Carlos and I got divorced.
20:29Is this too red?
20:30I think I need something pinker.
20:31It's fine.
20:32Hurry up.
20:33I want to get to the club
20:34while this bikini wax is still fresh.
20:36This is going to be fun.
20:38I can't believe we've never gone out
20:39in the town together.
20:40Well, we've never been single together before.
20:43Oh, I feel so sorry
20:44for all those other girls in the bar.
20:46So do I.
20:48To be fair,
20:48we should probably walk in backwards.
20:52Oh, no.
20:53That won't work.
20:55We're an unstoppable team.
20:58The hottest chicks on Mysterio Lane.
21:01Oh, be nice.
21:02There are lots of attractive women on the street.
21:04Like who?
21:06How about Brie?
21:08Uh, with that hair color,
21:10you could stick a red nose on her
21:11and she could join the circus.
21:13That's beautiful.
21:14Hmm, for a baby factory.
21:16And Susan,
21:17we're the hottest, okay?
21:22Wow.
21:23Too much?
21:26No, it's great.
21:28All right, come on, let's go.
21:40Wow, you were right about this place.
21:42Told ya.
21:43A lot of hotties.
21:44Very few notties.
21:47Ladies,
21:48this is from the gentleman
21:49at the end of the bar.
21:51Oh, and I just sat down.
21:53That's a personal best.
21:55Actually,
21:56the drink's for her.
22:03It's pretty dark in here.
22:04You probably didn't get a good look at me.
22:06Oh, you don't take it personally.
22:08We're just different types.
22:10You're right.
22:10Some like tall, blonde, and sexy
22:12and some men like...
22:14that.
22:16Now, now, Edie.
22:17Don't be snarky.
22:18We're both hot, remember?
22:20Although, apparently,
22:21I'm just a little bit hotter.
22:24Well, one guy might think so.
22:26One guy who's evidently
22:27intimidated by full-sized
22:29womanly breasts.
22:30Yes, I guess I am
22:32a little on the small side.
22:33That's the drawback
22:34to having ones that are real.
22:37What are you talking about?
22:38These are real?
22:39Oh, Edie, come on.
22:40When you jump up and down,
22:41the room moves more
22:42than your boobs.
22:43Oh.
22:45Oh, someone obviously
22:46has a chip on her shoulder.
22:48I'd reach down
22:49and knock it off,
22:50but I can't go down
22:51that low.
22:53Okay.
22:54You really think
22:55you're hotter than me?
22:56Let's just say that
22:57I have more
22:58of what men want.
23:00Yeah.
23:01Well, I have a vodka soda
23:02here that says otherwise.
23:04Ooh, so he bought you
23:05one drink.
23:06A well drink,
23:08I might add.
23:09Well, it's one more
23:09than you got.
23:13Are you saying
23:14that I can't get a man
23:16to buy me a cocktail?
23:17Sure you can.
23:18Just not as many as me.
23:22One hour.
23:23Whoever gets the most
23:24swizzle sticks by the end
23:26wins.
23:30See you in an hour,
23:32loser.
23:40I know what boys like.
23:42We know what's
23:43I know what boys like.
23:44I make them want me.
23:46I like to tease them.
23:48They want to touch me.
23:50I never let them out.
23:52I know what boys like.
23:54We know what guys want.
23:56I know what boys like.
23:59Boys like.
24:01Boys like me.
24:04Sucker.
24:05I know what boys like.
24:07We know what guys want.
24:09We know what boys like.
24:15We know what boys like.
24:17We know what boys like.
24:18Count them and weep.
24:20Solis.
24:23Well,
24:24I guess I could do that.
24:26Or I could do this.
24:35I should make some kind of speech.
24:38But I think it's enough. We both know I crushed you, right?
24:41Now if you'll excuse me, swivel stick number 17 has a yacht and giant feet.
25:01What the hell were you thinking? Abandoning me at a singles bar!
25:09I'm sorry, I just needed to be by myself for a while.
25:13Why? Don't tell me you're depressed because you lost some stupid game.
25:18I'm not depressed. I'm surprised. It's going by so quickly.
25:25What is it?
25:27My youth. The harder I try to hold onto it, the more it just slips through my fingers.
25:36And all the makeup and dim lighting in the world can't seem to stop it.
25:41Oh please, you're gorgeous. And you are going to stay that way forever.
25:48That's the tricky part. I'm not going to be old.
25:52What?
25:54Ever since I was a child. I've known that I was never going to see 50.
25:59Oh, that's ridiculous.
26:01No, it's true. As far back as I can remember, a voice in my head said,
26:07Live it up today because you're not going to have a lot of tomorrows.
26:11You do realize there's medication designed to get rid of those voices?
26:15It's not a bad thing, Gabby. It's actually a gift.
26:23I appreciate my life in a way that most people don't.
26:29I just didn't expect it to go by this fast. That's all.
26:38You know what? I have a voice inside my head that says you're wrong.
26:43It tells me that 50 years from now, you and I will still be wearing dresses too tight
26:49and walking in heels too high and going to bars where we'll meet old geezers
26:55who will buy us drinks with a blast of their social security checks.
27:00If you say so.
27:04Come on. Let's go to my house.
27:06Let's pop open a bottle of wine and toast to our future.
27:11Why not?
27:20Isn't that weird? She knew she was going to die young.
27:27What do you mean you two were the hottest chicks on the lane?
27:30She called me a baby factory?
27:33Yeah, Gabby. In hindsight, maybe you shouldn't have told that part of the story.
27:38I think we're here.
27:53So, are you ready for this?
27:55I don't know.
27:58Can you ever be ready to tell a boy that his mother is dead?
28:09Hey, Travers.
28:14Remember us?
28:16Sure.
28:18I brought the whole neighborhood with you.
28:22Did my mom come with you?
28:29We brought you some muffins.
28:31You can share them with your roommates or maybe a favorite teacher.
28:37What's going on?
28:39Is my mom in trouble or something?
28:45Come here.
28:50I'm afraid we have some bad news.
28:53Your mom was in a very serious accident.
28:57And I am so sorry.
29:00But she passed away.
29:06She died.
29:13When?
29:14A couple of days ago.
29:17We've been trying to get in touch with your dad, but he's still out of the country.
29:20And your mom's new husband's never met you, so he thought it would be best if we told you.
29:25Yeah.
29:28Wow.
29:31If you'd like, we could give you a moment.
29:34No.
29:36I'm okay.
29:41Well, I have a class.
29:46I'm sure this school will understand if you need to miss a few days.
29:49I don't need to do that.
29:51I mean, I'm sorry she's dead, but we weren't very close.
29:54Still, she was your mother.
29:56Technically.
29:58But not a very good one.
30:00Look, Travers, we're all moms here.
30:02We've all made mistakes with our kids.
30:04And what we count on is when they grow up, they'll forgive us.
30:07My mom didn't even try to raise me.
30:10I mean, she just handed me to my father and walked away.
30:13How do you expect me to forgive that?
30:17Look, I'm sorry. I don't mean to be rude, but I'm going to be late.
30:21Hey, hey, hey, hey, wait a second.
30:23Travers, you need to know something about your mom.
30:26And I'm going to tell you.
30:26Now sit down.
30:29I had only known your mom about a year when she came over to my house this one day.
30:35Hey, Karen, your porch light's on.
30:41Whoa.
30:42Sitting in your bathroom drinking and you didn't call me?
30:46I kind of wanted to be alone.
30:49Why?
30:53It's the anniversary of my son's death.
30:55Oh.
30:59I'm sorry.
31:02Every year I think it'll get easier.
31:04And it never does.
31:07Nothing worse than losing a child.
31:12In a way, you're kind of lucky you don't have any.
31:15Actually, I do.
31:18What?
31:19Hmm.
31:20I have a son.
31:23You lived here a year.
31:24How do I not know this?
31:26Because he lives with his father.
31:28When I got divorced, I gave him full custody.
31:31So I kind of know how you feel.
31:36And we both lost kids.
31:38No.
31:41I lost a kid.
31:42You gave yours away.
31:44And you have the nerve to tell me you know how I feel?
31:47I gave him up because I wanted to protect him.
31:50From who?
31:51From me.
31:53I tried to be a good mom, I really did.
31:56But I know myself.
31:58And if he...
32:00If he was gonna grow up normal, he needed to get away from me.
32:04What a cop-out.
32:06I think you're just being selfish.
32:08You know, trust me, Karen, there is nothing that you could say to make me think less about myself than
32:11I already do.
32:12But if it gives him a chance...
32:15It's worth it.
32:18Aren't you afraid he's gonna hate you?
32:22I love him enough to let him hate me.
32:37Well, I hope you're not making a big mistake.
32:49Hmm.
32:50Me too.
32:55So I'm not defending everything she did, Travers.
32:59But you have to know, she loved you.
33:02More than you can imagine.
33:08I really need to get to class.
33:19I believe I called the check gun.
33:22God, she's so good at that.
33:23She should be. She's been doing it since she rode shotgun on an actual stagecoach.
33:27Hey! Hey!
33:31I realized I never thanked you for coming all the way out here just to tell me.
33:37I was really cool of you.
33:39We thought we owed it to your mom.
33:42Oh, my God! They can't believe we forgot!
33:49We, uh, also came to give you your mom's ashes.
33:57We thought you might want to scatter them somewhere.
34:04Unless that's a little...
34:06weird for you.
34:11Why don't you guys take him?
34:14Are you sure?
34:17Yeah.
34:20You were her best friends.
34:24I'm sure you could think of the perfect place to put her.
34:38Okay.
34:39We're here.
34:41Guys.
34:42Wake up!
34:43Guys.
34:47We're home.
34:48Get out!
34:49Lord, Lynette, you nearly gave me a heart attack.
34:52Yeah, I'd like to see you again, but not tonight.
34:54Oh, I think my leg's asleep.
34:57Actually, that's my leg.
34:58Get your hand off.
35:00Lynette, thank you again for typing.
35:02You bet.
35:03Hold it!
35:05We still gotta figure out where we're gonna spread the ashes.
35:09Now, it's gotta be some place that was meaningful to Edie.
35:12Well, Edie once told me she lost her virginity in a cow pasture.
35:16If we can find that exact field...
35:18You can find a lot of traumatized cows.
35:21Do we really need to do this tonight?
35:23They're ashes.
35:24It's not like they're gonna go bad.
35:26Fine. We'll talk tomorrow.
35:42Well, Edie, what are we gonna do with you?
36:13Well, Edie is not save the house so I want to see my family tonight.
36:13You can find him that find out for me.
36:13We'll see you then.
36:13Yeah, anyway.
36:19Settled as always, I see.
36:33This was a wonderful idea, Karen.
36:36It wasn't exactly mine.
36:37Now be careful, you're spilling 80.
36:40Urn is empty.
36:42Let's do it.
36:43Shouldn't we say something first?
36:46Like what?
36:47I don't know.
36:48A few words describing how we felt about her?
36:51I don't think Edie would want us to get all sappy.
36:54I think if we're quick about it, she'd be fine.
36:56Here's a thought.
36:57We all say one word that sums up what we thought of her.
37:02And then we dump her.
37:03And then we dump her.
37:05Just one word.
37:06This is hard.
37:08Okay, I got one. I'll go first.
37:11Edie Britt was sexy.
37:15Perceptive.
37:16Strong.
37:19Beautiful.
37:19Mm-hmm.
37:23I need four words.
37:24Aye.
37:25Ah.
37:26Okay, I want to do Edie justice, and for that to happen, I need four words, okay?
37:30Edie would so not be surprised you're ruining this moment.
37:32Go ahead, Susan. What are your four words for Edie?
37:37One of a kind.
37:44Now, it's time.
37:48And that is how Wisteria Lane came to be my final resting place.
37:56My ashes were spread over grass I had once walked on.
38:03Beneath trees that had once given me shade.
38:14And beside fences I once gossiped over.
38:19And after my friends had finished saying goodbye, a wind came along and took what was left of me into
38:26the air.
38:29As I looked down on the world, I began to let go of it.
38:34I let go of white picket fences and cars and driveways, coffee cups and vacuum cleaners.
38:42I let go of all those things which seemed so ordinary, but when you put them together, they make up
38:48a life.
38:49A life that really was one of a kind.
38:54I'll tell you something.
38:56It's not hard to die when you know you have lived.
39:00And I did.
39:01Oh, how I lived.
39:03I lived.
39:04I lived.
39:05I lived.
39:06I lived.
39:06I lived.