- 22 hours ago
Charlie and Deception Therapy
Ed has been crankier than usual, so Charlie and the group persuade him to take a placebo pill that supposedly reduces anger. The plan seems to work out great and Ed claims that he no longer needs therapy, but it eventually backfires sending Ed back to Charlie's group. Jennifer wants to know Kate better, so she insists that Charlie let her go out with them.
Ed has been crankier than usual, so Charlie and the group persuade him to take a placebo pill that supposedly reduces anger. The plan seems to work out great and Ed claims that he no longer needs therapy, but it eventually backfires sending Ed back to Charlie's group. Jennifer wants to know Kate better, so she insists that Charlie let her go out with them.
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TVTranscript
00:00I gotta admit, Dad, you've really surprised me.
00:03Giving Sam your old car is really generous.
00:05You're getting soft in your old age.
00:06Hey, she's my grandbaby.
00:08I want her driving around in something safe.
00:09So what are you gonna use to get around?
00:11I'm gonna keep driving my car.
00:13Excuse me?
00:15I figure you're only gonna take Sam out for a driving lesson once a week,
00:18so we leave the car parked at my place,
00:20and you can call and schedule a time to use it whenever you want.
00:23Schedule a time?
00:24Hold on.
00:26Who's gonna pay for the maintenance and the tags and everything else?
00:29Well, I'm old-fashioned, and you know,
00:31I'd make Sam get a job so she could pay for it,
00:33but it'll probably end up being you.
00:37You're like an evil Tom Sawyer.
00:40I'm not gonna paint your fence, and I'm not gonna buy your car.
00:43Here, take your paint slip back.
00:44No, it's too late. I already told Sam, and she's thrilled.
00:46But if you want to break her heart, it's your car.
00:50You can't take advantage of me, old man.
00:52I know where you live, because I pay your rent.
00:55This is why you don't get cable.
01:01Sorry. Sorry.
01:03I'm sure you all heard that.
01:05A little problem with my dad.
01:07I accidentally confused him with a caring and loving grandfather.
01:11How'd that make you feel?
01:14Thanks, Ed. I appreciate your concern.
01:16It was a little upsetting.
01:17Really?
01:18Yeah.
01:19Why don't we talk about it for six months?
01:22Did you use your tools?
01:25Well, you're clearly having a worse day than usual.
01:27Why? Because I'm not my usual ray of goddamn sunshine?
01:33Well, let's try to turn it around today.
01:34Talk about the positive things we can take from negative experiences.
01:38For example, I just found another reason not to be sad when my dad dies.
01:44Who wants to go next?
01:45I will.
01:46Well, I had a negative experience that taught me that a good friend is the most important thing in the
01:51world.
01:52Well, that's great. How did you learn that?
01:54Because I was at this club, and this girl gave me a dirty look, so I threw my drink in
01:57her face, but the stir stick hit her in the eye, and her friend was nice enough to take her
02:02to the hospital.
02:04That meant a lot to me.
02:06I've got another positive spin on that story.
02:09That's great, Ed. Let's hear it.
02:10Well, an innocent girl got tired of using her eyeballs, so Lacey tries to poke it out for her.
02:17Of course, I'm not a professional.
02:20I can tell you what else you're not. A subtle drunk.
02:23I can smell the old granddad from here, old granddad.
02:27Ed, what's in the can?
02:28Narc.
02:30Ed, you can't drink and groove.
02:32Well, I can fix that. I'll go home.
02:34Hey, look. I made a positive out of a negative.
02:39Ed, Ed, Ed, please sit down.
02:40No, no. It won't do any good. I mean, I'm not getting any better.
02:44What's 20 minutes going to do? I'll just call my wife and tell her to burn my dinner early.
02:48She's the only reason I'm here anyway.
02:50Wow. Your wife makes you come here?
02:53No. It's purely coincidental that if I don't come, my wife said she'd leave me.
02:59Ed, Ed, these are all things you should talk about in group. Why don't you stick around?
03:03No, I'm leaving. You can't stop me.
03:05Yeah, let's just leave that to the telephone pole at the end of the block.
03:10Okay, because of that, you're taking Ed home.
03:13Hey, it's right with me.
03:15Because I actually care about my fellow human beings.
03:18Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. That was way too easy.
03:21Where were you planning on taking him?
03:23Transvestite bar in Koreatown.
03:27Lacey, would you take Ed home?
03:28I'd be glad to.
03:30Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Lacey.
03:33Black Comedy Club, South Central.
03:36No one?
03:37Yeah.
03:40I trust you.
03:41Would you please take Ed home?
03:43Okay.
03:44Okay.
03:45We only have a twin bed, but we can sleep head to toe.
03:51Ah, that was great.
03:53I told you you'd like it.
03:55High five.
04:01Listen, I'm having a problem with one of my patients.
04:04Seriously?
04:05Run-tie me.
04:06Well, I would, but then you wouldn't listen to me talk about one of my patients.
04:10Ed has been very disruptive in group.
04:13Pickles.
04:14What?
04:15Not that was our safe word.
04:16No, we changed it.
04:18Anyway, he's a tough old guy.
04:20Yeah, I've had clients that age.
04:21Sometimes they're just too set in their ways.
04:23If he's a problem, cut him loose.
04:26While you're at it, cut me loose, too.
04:28No, no, no man left behind.
04:30I gotta find a way to help him.
04:33Spackle.
04:34Close.
04:36But it doesn't matter.
04:37I thought maybe we could go again.
04:39Already?
04:40Yeah, I used that Chinese herb stuff you gave me for my birthday.
04:42I mean, it works.
04:44No wonder they got two billion people.
04:47You're kidding me.
04:49I forgot to get you a gift, so I just dumped some spices and tea in a jar.
04:53That was a joke.
04:55So it was all me?
04:56Well, I'd like to think I was in there somewhere.
04:59Maybe this could work for Ed.
05:01Are you two having trouble in the bedroom?
05:04No, no, no.
05:05But if I can convince Ed to take some kind of a magic bullet that'll suppress his anger,
05:09he'll believe it and feel less angry.
05:11No, bad idea.
05:13Placebos are fine for drug research, but not for therapy.
05:15And are you okay with lying to a patient?
05:18Well, I'll have to tell him eventually, but hopefully by then he'll have enough positive results
05:22and realize that it was in him all along.
05:24But you tell me if you think I'm wrong.
05:25You're wrong.
05:28See?
05:28I mean, you're not sure.
05:37Holy crap.
05:38How many pages have to fill out just so you can go on a field trip to feed the homeless?
05:41Well, I need your permission to go into that neighborhood.
05:44There's a homeless neighborhood?
05:45Here's an idea.
05:46Let's build some houses there.
05:48Okay, fine.
05:50Let's do this.
05:52Uh, does your child have lice?
05:54No.
05:55Any emotional issues or disorders that might create a difficulty for your child to participate
05:59in this activity?
06:01Do we finally tell him I have OCD or not?
06:04I thought we were going to save that little gem for college when we start begging for financial aid.
06:08You write down OCD, sweetheart, and it could ruin your chances of getting a job someday.
06:13Or it could help me land that touching-everything-twice job I've always dreamt about.
06:18Thanks for the parenting advice, Dad, but we want Sam to think of you as more of a cautionary tale.
06:24All right, we will leave this decision for the next field trip.
06:28There you go, sweetie.
06:29Yep.
06:30You ask me, all this paperwork's a lot of nonsense.
06:32When I was a kid, we learned how to milk rattlesnakes in school, and nobody had to sign crap.
06:38Are you ever going to stop being a pain in the ass, or have you just given up?
06:45Hey, Charlie, before I leave, can I ask you something about Kate?
06:49Does she hate me?
06:50No.
06:51No, she likes you.
06:52Why?
06:52Well, I texted her a couple of times about us going out together, and she never got back to me.
06:57I know she's really busy.
06:59Well, it kind of bums me out.
07:00I mean, I barely have any women friends, and I just thought, you know, you guys are so close.
07:04She must be pretty fun to hang out with.
07:07Eh, I wouldn't say fun.
07:10I mean, we're friends, but I bring, like, 80% of the fun.
07:15Should be maybe 10.
07:18There's another 10% that's, like, I don't know, accidental fun.
07:22Well, then maybe think about the three of us doing something together sometime.
07:26That could be fun.
07:27Oh, I have thought about it.
07:30You're right, it could be fun.
07:32Hey, guys, thanks for coming in early.
07:35Something I want to talk to you about.
07:37Hey, where's Ed?
07:38That's what this is about.
07:39I asked him to come at the normal time.
07:41Now, I know we all think Ed can be a pain at times, but deep down, I think we all
07:46care about him and don't want to see him suffer, right?
07:48Oh, my God, we're going to have him put down.
07:51No, we're not going to have Ed destroyed.
07:54But, no.
07:57I'm just going to be trying a new technique on him.
07:59But in order for it to work, I need you all to participate.
08:02You're going to be taking placebo pills.
08:04I'm going to tell Ed it's been proven to decrease anger and negativity while filling you with a sense of
08:09euphoria and love for your fellow man.
08:12Like ecstasy?
08:13Yeah, yeah, I just want to pretend that there are similar qualities, sure.
08:16Well, why can't you just give us ecstasy?
08:18Because it's illegal and I'm not going to hand out any real drugs.
08:21I just need you guys to pretend that you've been taking it for a week and it works.
08:24I have a better idea.
08:26Why don't you give Ed the sugar pill and we'll take the ecstasy?
08:29Ecstasy.
08:32I'm not giving anybody ecstasy.
08:34We're all taking sugar pills.
08:36It's called deception therapy.
08:38But the only way it works is if you all participate.
08:41One more question.
08:42Will this placebo react badly with my ecstasy?
08:49Ed, perfect timing.
08:51I was just checking the results of the new pills I gave the group after you left early last week.
08:56What kind of pills?
08:56It's a pill that actually reduces anger while promoting feelings of love and tolerance.
09:02I'd love for you to be part of the test group.
09:04We're seeing great results.
09:05Just ask Patrick.
09:08Well, I started a week ago and I have never felt happier.
09:14You're kind of happy.
09:15I just got shared tickets happy or I just met the queer guy from Glee happy.
09:23Oh, Edward.
09:26You see, Patrick's a totally different person.
09:28But this one's gay, too.
09:31All right.
09:32Maybe I will try it.
09:33As long as it doesn't interfere with my cholesterol medicine.
09:36It won't.
09:36What about my blood pressure pill?
09:38Absolutely not.
09:39My prostate pill.
09:41Antifungal.
09:42Blood thinner.
09:43Restless leg.
09:44Sleepy leg.
09:46No, I'm pretty sure this is one that just blends in with the crowd.
09:49All right.
09:50You've sold me on it.
09:52I'll go get some water.
09:53Boy, I hope this works.
09:55Because if it doesn't, I'll probably lose my wife and my house and everything that's dear to me.
10:01Mmm.
10:02Sugary.
10:07I just got your text.
10:11Please don't make me go out with Jen.
10:14Just once.
10:15Otherwise she wants to hang out with both of us on our play date nights.
10:18And that's worse.
10:20Right?
10:22Right.
10:24I can't do it.
10:25I hate lying to Jen about us.
10:26Makes me feel like a creep.
10:28Look, you and I were just friends back when Jen and I were still married.
10:30If she finds out we're sleeping together now, she'll never believe we weren't doing it back then.
10:35Even if that's true, Jen and I have nothing in common.
10:38One time.
10:39It'll be way better than her trying to hang out with us on the nights we want to have sex.
10:43Right?
10:46Let me know.
10:50All right.
10:52How are those pills working out for everybody?
10:53Awesome.
10:54Great.
10:56Ed?
11:00I'm so happy I can kiss all of you.
11:04What's happening to your face?
11:06Are you having some kind of a stroke?
11:07Oh my God, you're smiling.
11:11I've never been so happy.
11:13I was pulling out of the Home Depot last night and somebody blocked me in.
11:17But I didn't get pissed off.
11:19I just sat in my car and watched two Mexicans eat shaved ice.
11:25It was beautiful.
11:27Actually, Ed, I think any ethnicity eating shaved ice is beautiful.
11:32That is a good thought, Patrick.
11:38Oh, before we start, my wife and I are having a little shindig for our 40th this weekend.
11:44And she asked me to invite my friends.
11:47I look around this room and that's all I see.
11:51I'd be honored to come and I'm sure everybody else would be as well.
11:55No, I can't.
11:56I'm bleeding.
12:00That's too bad.
12:02You remember that brother-in-law I told you about?
12:04The one I went after with a machete and that game of horseshoes a couple of years ago?
12:08Well, I feel so good that I've invited him and we're going to finish that game of horseshoes.
12:14Yeah.
12:15Oh, yeah.
12:15I can make that.
12:16I can do that.
12:17Ed, Ed, this is amazing.
12:19He triggered probably your worst blackout rage.
12:22I'll tell you, Charlie, he makes me mad.
12:24Well, you're used to, but I feel like a new man now and I'd just like to say thank you.
12:29You're welcome, Ed.
12:30Not to you.
12:31The guy that invented those pills.
12:34Now if the pill can only do something about my damn prostate.
12:40This is fantastic.
12:43Ed is on the verge of a tremendous breakthrough.
12:46We're about to witness the power of the human mind overcoming years of hostility and anger.
12:51Yeah, and we're probably going to get to watch him kill his brother-in-law with a horseshoe.
12:59And that's why I'm convinced that my little Hungarian grandmother on the way to Ellis Island invented the body shot.
13:08We have a little more wine over here.
13:11You know, I have to be honest.
13:12I was a bit hesitant to go out with you.
13:14I just don't have a lot of luck hanging out with women.
13:17Really?
13:18Me too.
13:19That's the way we look, isn't it?
13:21I don't know what it is, but most women think I'm a bitch.
13:26I know I did.
13:29What did you think of me?
13:30I thought you were so hot, you had to be stupid.
13:34That is so sweet.
13:37No, I mean it.
13:38Well, I believe you, because, you know, you're a lesbian.
13:42Jennifer.
13:43Yeah?
13:44Take a drink, you're going to need it.
13:46Are you going to hit on me?
13:48Wait.
13:51Okay, go.
13:53I'm not gay anymore.
13:55Oh.
13:57What happened?
13:59I was never strictly gay.
14:02And now, I'm officially not.
14:05Oh, was it a tragic affair with some girl who broke your heart?
14:09Or did you just miss the banging?
14:12The banging.
14:14This is perfect.
14:16Listen, you're looking for a guy.
14:17I'm looking for a guy.
14:19We could go hunting together.
14:21We're cougars.
14:23Oh, you don't want to hang out with me.
14:25I'm an academic.
14:26I'm really not a lot of fun.
14:28That's what Charlie said.
14:30Really?
14:31Yeah, but, you know, I bet under all that black stuff is somebody who wants to bust out and
14:35have a good time.
14:36Here's the deal.
14:38Thursday, El Tostada on Ventura Boulevard.
14:41Half-pressed, getting margaritas.
14:42You like musicians because there's a guitar store down the block and a bunch of those
14:46dudes come in.
14:47Well, that is definitely something I would only do with you.
14:53Then, to us.
14:58Yeah, don't do that.
15:07Hey, guys.
15:08Sorry I'm late.
15:09How long time finding this place?
15:10Yeah, me too.
15:10I put white racist guy in my GPS.
15:12This whole side of town lit up.
15:15I know.
15:15I'm pretty sure I drove past a white Angus steakhouse.
15:19Lacey and I just got in here, too.
15:20We had to stop and buy some vitamins from her friend in a Burger King parking lot.
15:25Where is he?
15:26Hey, there's Ed.
15:28We should go over and give him a hug.
15:30Wait, we should give each other a hug.
15:34I'm drunk.
15:35No, I'm just on ecstasy.
15:37But I did wash it down with the mojito.
15:41And we'll talk about this in group.
15:43Yes, we will.
15:44And for the rest of our lives.
15:45I'm dancing away.
15:48Hey, Charlie.
15:50I'm glad you can make it.
15:51Are you kidding?
15:52I wouldn't have missed it.
15:53Hey, uh...
15:53How's everything going?
15:54Oh, pretty good.
15:55Wife's happy.
15:58I need to ask you a question.
16:00Is it safe to take two of these in one day?
16:04Sure.
16:04It's as needed.
16:07Good.
16:07Well, here comes that son of a bitch again.
16:09There you are.
16:11Come on.
16:11Tell me where you're hiding the good scotch, you cheap bastard.
16:14Hey there.
16:15I'm Charlie.
16:16You must be Ray, Ed's brother-in-law.
16:18That's who I am.
16:19Thanks.
16:19I almost forgot.
16:21Jerk off.
16:23No, seriously.
16:24It's good to meet you.
16:26Ray, uh...
16:27These are friends of mine.
16:29This is a party.
16:30I'd appreciate it if you'd make a little effort.
16:33Well, there's a healthy attitude.
16:34And who among us wouldn't be better off by making a little effort?
16:37Wait a minute.
16:37I know who you are.
16:38You're Ed Shrink.
16:39That's right.
16:40Well, congratulations.
16:41You turned him into a real puss.
16:45I tried to take him on a hunting trip.
16:46He said, no, too many anger triggers.
16:48Puss.
16:51Ed, weren't you going to show me around the house?
16:53No.
16:54Yeah.
16:55Give him a tour of Casa Disappointment.
16:57And after that, I want to finish that game of horseshoes.
17:00I've been waiting a long time to kick your butt.
17:03You got it, Ray.
17:04Ed, Ed, Ed, can I talk to you for a second?
17:09Ed, look, you've been doing a great job.
17:13But now it's time to walk away from this guy.
17:15I can handle this.
17:16I just need to take a few more of these pills.
17:18Look, Ray is beyond what these can handle.
17:23Truth is, they're sugar pills, Ed.
17:25They're placebos.
17:27You've been giving me sugar pills?
17:29But here's the best part.
17:31That means you've been controlling your anger on your own.
17:33You used to be Ed, the angry old guy.
17:37And now you're Ed, the old guy.
17:41And everybody knew about this but me.
17:44I feel like a damn fool.
17:48You've got about ten seconds to get off my property.
17:53Ed, Ed, you're not a fool.
17:56You've had a breakthrough.
17:57So why don't we just enjoy the party and talk about this Tuesday in group?
18:00What do I need group for?
18:02You just said that I can control my own anger on my own.
18:06Hey, Ray.
18:07What?
18:07I've changed my mind.
18:09Pack up the guns and booze.
18:10We're going hunting.
18:12All right.
18:17So it didn't go well.
18:19Hey, for a placebo test, it went very well.
18:21Usually half the group gets heart disease or cancer.
18:24Ed didn't get any of that.
18:26But you lost a patient because you tricked him.
18:28I know.
18:28I know.
18:29He doesn't trust me anymore.
18:30I get it.
18:30So why do you think you went so far to help this guy?
18:34Good question.
18:39Well, does he remind you of anyone?
18:42I don't know.
18:43Just another old guy like my dad.
18:45Real stubborn.
18:47Won't listen to anyone like my dad.
18:49Drinks a little.
18:50Doesn't respect me, you know.
18:52Like my dad.
18:54You know who he reminds me of?
18:56Wilford Brimley.
18:58Stop it.
18:59You know, ever since your father came back into your life, you've been extremely frustrated
19:04with him.
19:05And you've transferred your need to change your dad into another stubborn old guy, Ed.
19:10You're not going to change Ed, so break this pattern.
19:13Let him go.
19:14You're right.
19:16I'm going to go get Ed back.
19:23What do you want?
19:26I want to apologize.
19:30One of my jobs as your therapist is to help build your trust.
19:34And in this case, I feel like I might have taken advantage of it.
19:38So, you want me to come back, I guess.
19:40Yes, I do.
19:42What's in it for me?
19:44Just a chance to make your life free from the emotional turmoil that's followed you around
19:48like a black dog for the last 70 years.
19:51Not enough.
19:53I want a discount.
19:5520 percent.
19:57This set me way back.
19:59You're right.
19:59It was a horrible setback, and I am responsible.
20:03But I'm seeing this as more of a 10 percent setback.
20:0810's fair.
20:09I'll just grab my sweater.
20:11Oh, and I need your Sigmund Freud on that.
20:15Ed, this is from the Superior Court of Los Angeles.
20:17Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
20:20They said if I don't want to go to jail, I've got to go back to anger management.
20:24You tried to kill your brother-in-law?
20:27No, I just took him deer hunting.
20:30We got in the middle of the woods, and I made him put some antlers on his head and run
20:36through
20:36the forest making deer noises.
20:40Okay.
20:41Wow.
20:42Many questions.
20:45Why would he agree to that?
20:47A man will agree to a lot if a gun's pointed at his nuts.
20:52So, legally, you had to come back anyway.
20:55Yep.
20:56Tricked you.
20:58Feels good, don't it?
21:01Oh, Ed, just one more thing.
21:04You said you made your brother-in-law run around and make deer noises.
21:07Just exactly what does a deer sound like?
21:10Well, in this case, it was,
21:11Help me!
21:12Help me!
21:13Help me!
21:14I love a deer!
21:17Thanks.
21:18That was bugging me.
21:20Ha ha ha!
21:22That was bugging me.
21:26That was bugging me.
21:27That was bugging me.
21:28That was bugging me.
21:29That was bugging me.
21:31That was bugging me.
21:32You
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