00:01Previously on The Big Bang Theory...
00:03Who says something like that right in the middle of sex?
00:05I don't know. It was the heat of the moment.
00:07No, the heat of the moment is, oh yeah, just like that.
00:10Not, will you marry me?
00:14NASA really wants my telescope up on the space station,
00:18so they're putting me on an earlier launch.
00:21When?
00:22A week from Friday.
00:24What? We're getting married that Sunday.
00:26You're right. I can't go to space.
00:30I have to get married.
00:32No one can say that's not a good reason.
00:33I'll call him back.
00:36We'll have the wedding when you get back.
00:37Your dad's gonna be furious.
00:39There's no way he's gonna let us postpone this wedding while we try it.
00:44I'll talk to him. He won't say no to his little girl.
00:47No, I should talk to him. Man to man.
00:52All right, look, I'm gonna level with you.
00:53I'm terrified about going into space.
00:57What if I don't make it back?
01:00It's gonna be okay, son.
01:03You really think so?
01:05Of course.
01:06A pretty girl like Bernadette,
01:09she'll find a new guy.
01:1512th stage is ready.
01:1812th stage is ready.
01:21Hey, Mike.
01:22Yeah?
01:23I changed my mind. I don't want to do this.
01:27Good one.
01:29Yeah, I'm a funny guy.
01:31I also have a hysterical bit planned for later where I pretend to cry through the whole launch.
01:47Sheldon, what channel is NASA TV?
01:50289.
01:50Right between the game show Network at 288 and the East Coast feed of the Disney Channel on 290.
01:57I love his eidetic memory. It's so sexy.
02:01Sheldon, what are the ingredients in Pringles?
02:03Dried potatoes, vegetable oil, corn flour, wheat starch, maltodextrin, salt, and my favorite ingredient of all, uniformity.
02:13The uterus quivers, does it not?
02:16There's Howard's rocket, live from Kazakhstan.
02:18Oh, God, I'm so nervous. I don't think I could watch.
02:21You're nervous. I've been stress eating for four days. Look at me.
02:25I'm wearing my fat pants.
02:29Remarkable.
02:30In just under a half hour, 200 metric tons of fuel will ignite in a controlled explosion right beneath Howard's
02:36keister.
02:38All from a country whose entire contribution to the global economy has been Tetris and mail order brides.
02:45Give me those damn Pringles!
02:50Center, tell me, is the whole ship's system working?
02:53Yes.
02:54Okay, we're in the final countdown. How are you doing over there?
02:58Good, good. Quick question. I missed it in the briefing. How much urine do these suits hold?
03:05Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state that nearly 14 million years ago, expansion started way around.
03:13The earth began to cool, the autotrophs began to drool, the androols developed tools, we built a wall.
03:17We built a pyramid, snap sites, history unraveling, the mystery that all started with a big bang.
03:29Hey, Fruit Loops, wanna hit your fan switch?
03:32Check.
03:34He calls you Fruit Loops because of your very gay haircut?
03:40No, it's because I live with my mom and she makes me Fruit Loops.
03:45Go with gay story. People are more accepting of that.
03:50Actually, Fruit Loops just got married to a girl.
03:55Congratulations.
03:56Thanks. We decided to do it before the launch.
03:59You and Mrs. Loops have a big wedding?
04:04Not exactly. Listen, if you don't mind, I'm not really up for chatting.
04:07I'm just gonna sit here quietly and let my life flash before my eyes.
04:15That went really quick. Let me try it again.
04:22Close your eyes. Put out your hand. I got you something special.
04:25Come on, Howard. I'm not falling for that again.
04:30No. Here.
04:35Oh, Howie. A little star. It's beautiful.
04:40Put it on me.
04:41Okay, but I'm gonna have to get it back from you so I can take it to the International Space
04:46Station.
04:47That way, when I come home, you will have a star that was actually in space.
04:54Oh, my God.
04:56Take that, every guy who's ever bought you anything.
05:01This is the most amazing gift I've ever gotten.
05:04Really? If you like it that much, close your eyes and put out your hand.
05:11I'm going to the supermarket to buy snacks for your trip.
05:15Do you want me to get those little boxes of Froot Loops you like?
05:20No, when I eat Froot Loops, the other astronauts make fun of me.
05:28Howard, I don't want to wait until you're back to get married.
05:31What?
05:31I want to be married to you before you get in that rocket.
05:35But I'm leaving in two days.
05:37What about Apple Jacks?
05:41I don't need to take cereal.
05:43What kind of breakfast do you think they're going to give you in Russia?
05:48They invented princes. I'll be fine.
05:52They invented the light bulb in New Jersey.
05:55It doesn't mean they hand them out to you when you go.
06:00We'll have a quick little ceremony with just our friends
06:02and we'll still have the big reception with everyone when you get back.
06:06Wow.
06:07Okay, let's get married.
06:13You know what?
06:14I'll buy you all brand in case you get stopped up in outer space.
06:23So anyway, we decided to go down to City Hall this afternoon, get married, and then have the reception when
06:28Howard gets back.
06:28Oh, that's so good.
06:30I mean, we know it's short notice, but we'd love you all to come with us.
06:33No, no, no! This is not the wedding I wanted!
06:38I want to wear my maid of honor dress and walk down the aisle with a hundred eyes on me
06:42while a string quartet plays the way you look tonight.
06:46That wasn't going to be our procession on you.
06:47Well, it was going to be mine!
06:50Thank you for the invitation, but I have to decline because it doesn't sound like something I'll enjoy.
06:57Come on, Sheldon, it'll be fun.
06:59That's what you said about the Green Lantern movie.
07:03You were a hundred and fourteen minutes of wrong.
07:07So, what do you say, Amy?
07:10Can I wear my maid of honor dress?
07:12Seriously? You're going to wear that thing to City Hall?
07:14It's all I have left. You're going to take that from me, too?
07:24Amy, you look great.
07:26I know.
07:30Where'd you get a beer?
07:31From that happy young couple over there with all the tattoos.
07:35Beautiful story, they're in rival drug gangs and they're getting married.
07:39Shh! No one can know.
07:43Look at all these people in love.
07:45Kind of gets you thinking, doesn't it?
07:47It does, indeed.
07:50Leonard, is it awkward being here with Penny given that you recently proposed to her?
07:57You proposed to Penny?
07:58I don't want to talk about it.
07:59Where did he pop the question? What did you say?
08:01She said, no, can we drop it now?
08:02It wasn't a real proposal.
08:04I wasn't a real proposal.
08:05He asked her during coitus.
08:09Did you get down on one knee or were you already there?
08:15Henry, don't talk like that on your wedding day.
08:17Sorry, Ma.
08:18Bernadette, Ma Bernadette, you're Ma Bernadette.
08:22Good move, Tally and Sheldon.
08:23Well, I can't propose, I can't talk to my friends.
08:26Is there anything else I'm not allowed to do?
08:27All right, that's enough.
08:29Today is not about you two.
08:31Today is about Howard and Bernadette.
08:33And me.
08:36Folks, can I have your attention?
08:38It's five o'clock.
08:39We're going to be able to take three more couples.
08:40The rest of you will have to come back on Monday.
08:43No.
08:44I got this.
08:45Excuse me, but is there any way you can squeeze us in?
08:49See, I'm an astronaut and I'm leaving for Russia on Sunday
08:55so I can take a Soyuz rocket to the International Space Station.
08:59Yeah, me too.
09:00I'll see you there.
09:03I can't believe we're not going to get married.
09:06Excuse me, I'm going to go see if the couple at the front of the line needs a maid of
09:09honor.
09:16So I tell my wife, get a dog, don't get a dog.
09:19I'm not working it, I'm not feeding it, I'm not picking up after it.
09:24You know you're going to wind up walking it.
09:27I know.
09:29Uh, shouldn't you guys be talking about space stuff instead of dogs?
09:34Dimitri, Fruit Loops would be more comfortable if we talked about space stuff.
09:41Okay.
09:42I'm going into space, and when I come back I have to pick up a poodle crab.
09:49Is that better?
09:52Thanks.
09:56You know, we can always drive to Vegas and get married.
09:59No, isn't that kind of tacky?
10:01Hey, I know tons of people who got married in Vegas.
10:04Are any of them still married?
10:05Yeah.
10:06I mean, not to the same people, but...
10:09There's gotta be someplace special we could do it.
10:12Leonard, where did you envision marrying Penny?
10:17Will you shut up?
10:22I know how to make it special.
10:24I told you we are not recreating the wedding from the sound of music.
10:28Yes, you made that brutally clear to me.
10:31What I was going to suggest is if that you're willing to wait until Sunday morning,
10:35the Google satellite will be over Pasadena.
10:38You can have your wedding photographed from space.
10:41That's so cool.
10:42Oh, way to go, Raj.
10:44I keep telling you, if I wasn't an astrophysicist, I would have been a party planner.
10:49It was always a coin flip.
10:52Okay, so we know we're going to do it Sunday morning.
10:54Now we need to find a good place for the satellite to see us.
10:58How about our roof?
11:01Oh, that's great.
11:02My gosh.
11:03I can't believe my maid of honor dress is going to be on Google Earth.
11:08So we have the where and the when, but we still need to figure out who's going to do the
11:12ceremony.
11:13Well, that's easy. Anyone can go online and get ordained as a minister.
11:16I know a piercing parlor where for a hundred bucks they'll marry you and stick a wedding ring through any
11:20body part you want.
11:24Great. Well, what's it going to be?
11:26I'll do it, provided I can perform the ceremony in Klingon.
11:31No.
11:33What do you see in her?
11:39What's it going to be?
11:41Leaking? What's leaking?
11:43Fuel.
11:47It's not so bad.
11:49You can go out.
11:50Great. Thank you, Center.
11:53There's fuel leaking and we're still going to go?
11:56Don't lose your fruit loops, fruit loops.
12:00This happens a lot. Nine times out of ten, no problem.
12:04What happens on the tenth time?
12:07Problem.
12:12Hey, guys, before I forget, I got you a little groomsman present.
12:15Oh, thanks, man.
12:17Fantastic Four, annual number three from 1965 in mint condition.
12:21The one where Mr. Fantastic and the invisible girl get married.
12:26Oh, dear.
12:29I was afraid of this.
12:31What?
12:32While a thoughtful gift, this comic book in this condition is worth at least a hundred dollars.
12:38Yeah, so?
12:38Well, I bought you and Bernadette a gravy boat worth eighty-eight dollars.
12:43Which places me in your debt.
12:46And I can't be in your debt because someday you might ask me to help you move.
12:52Or to kill a man.
12:55I doubt he'll ask you to kill a man.
12:58But what if it's his only way out? I can't risk it.
13:02Here is twelve dollars.
13:07Now we're even.
13:08Yeah, wait, wait, wait, wait.
13:09I bought a card. Give me two dollars.
13:15For the record, this is why I hate gift giving.
13:22Who is it?
13:23It's the groom.
13:26Can't come in. Bad luck to see the bride.
13:30Okay, fine.
13:31Bernie, I have to go pick up my mother. I'll be right back.
13:35Why can't she drive herself?
13:37She doesn't want to sit in her dress and wrinkle it, so I'm going to lay her down in the
13:41back of my neighbor's van.
13:45All right, just hurry.
13:46Okay, I'll see you later, my lovely bride-to-be.
13:50I'll see you later.
13:52Really, I'll watch that.
14:00Come on, Raj, we're ready to start.
14:02We're ready?
14:03When I say we're ready.
14:07Okay, now we're ready.
14:12Ma, you want to move your chair over here so you can see?
14:16I'm fine where I am. I don't want to fall off the roof.
14:22Fall through the roof before you fall off it.
14:27Benny?
14:33Your new mother-in-law's a piece of work.
14:36Not now, Dad.
14:38She's got a bigger mustache than me.
14:43Here you go.
14:46Here you go. What am I, a football?
14:55Like that guy could catch a football.
15:00Howard and Bernadette, the five of us stand before you as your friends and newly ordained ministers.
15:06Louder!
15:09They all got ordained!
15:11They're all marrying us!
15:13It's adorable!
15:13If you want to hear it, come closer!
15:19Guys, when I look at the two of you starting your lives together, it fills my heart.
15:27It fills my heart.
15:30Okay, I'm gonna need a minute.
15:33Okay, I'll go.
15:35Howard and Bernadette, I know you two planned on getting married in a big fancy wedding.
15:40But when you're in love, it doesn't matter where or how these things happen.
15:44It just matters that you have each other.
15:47Hmm.
15:51Problem?
15:54No.
15:55I think the Reverend Hofstadter is making an ironic connection between your statement about love
16:01and your rejection of his proposal in the bedroom.
16:04Oh, girl.
16:05I didn't say it.
16:06All right, that's enough from the both of you.
16:07Well, he started it.
16:08Well, I'm ending it.
16:13Bernadette.
16:14I want to thank you for allowing me to be your maid of honor.
16:18I also want you to know that I will be happy to do it again if this marriage craps out.
16:29Thank you, Amy.
16:31Very touching.
16:34Howard and Bernadette, you are lucky enough to be best friends who love each other.
16:39And that's the strongest kind of love, because at its core, it has kindness, patience, and respect.
16:47qualities that are hard to find in people these days.
16:56Would you like some aloe vera?
16:58You just got burned.
17:02All right.
17:04My turn.
17:05Howard.
17:07Bernadette.
17:09Dachdaj.
17:10Mocha.
17:11Mocha.
17:12Dachdaj.
17:12Something.
17:13I told you don't cling on.
17:19Fine.
17:19I'll do it in English, but it loses something.
17:23The need to find another human being to share one's life with has always puzzled me.
17:31Maybe because I am so interesting all by myself.
17:35With that being said, may you find as much happiness with each other as I find on my own.
17:42The Klingon would have made you cry.
17:47I believe you two have prepared vows.
17:53Howard Joel Wolowitz, like you, this is going to be short and sweet.
18:00I love you with all my heart and soul and promise to be with you forever.
18:10Bernadette.
18:11Marianne.
18:12Rostenkowski.
18:12Speak up!
18:14From now on, she's the only woman who can yell at me!
18:22Until I met you, I couldn't imagine spending my life with just one person.
18:29And now, I can't imagine spending one day of it without you.
18:37By the power vested in us, by the state of California and the Klingon High Council.
18:45We now pronounce you husband and wife!
18:49Woo!
18:50Woo!
18:52Woo!
18:53Woo!
18:55Woo!
18:57Woo!
18:57Woo!
19:08That's Ignition!
19:09I love this part!
19:11Me too!
19:13I have strongly mixed feelings.
19:18Oh, my God, it's happening.
19:21Did I miss it?
19:21No, come on in. Hurry.
19:25I love that man.
19:27Me, too.
19:33Can't believe it.
19:35This whole time, a small part of me thought he was lying.
19:43This is it.
19:45Boldly go, Howard Wolowitz.
19:47Three, two, one, go.
19:53Easy!
20:12I'm going to be you.
20:20I'm going to be you.
20:23You're welcome.
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