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Watch The Big Bang Theory AMZN GalaxyTV Season 5 Episode 23 online in HD on Dailymotion.
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00:06Howard Wolowitz.
00:07Hey, Howard. Dave Roger here at NASA.
00:09We need to talk about your upcoming mission.
00:11Yes, yes, I've been doing my push-ups.
00:15I'm still stuck at nine, but...
00:20It's going all the way down with no one holding me.
00:24That's great, but that's not why I called.
00:26We've run into a bit of a snafu.
00:28Your Soyuz capsule failed the pressurization test,
00:31so bottom line, the mission's been scrubbed.
00:35You're kidding. So what does that mean?
00:39Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
00:43Boy, I've got to tell you, I'm really disappointed.
00:46This was my dream ever since I was a little kid.
00:52Okay, thanks for the call.
00:55Yeah, you too.
00:57Yes! Thank you!
01:02I'm not going to die in space.
01:07I'm going to die the way God intended in my late 50s with a heart full of pastrami.
01:13No universe was in a hot, dense state
01:16That nearly 14 million years ago
01:18Expansions started waiting
01:20The earth began to cool
01:21The autotrophs began to drew me
01:23And recalls developed tools
01:24We built a wall
01:25We built the pyramids
01:26Math, science, history
01:27Unraveling the mystery
01:28That all started with a big bang
01:36I'm going to need a larger shirt
01:42This one's a little tight under the arms
01:44Okay
01:46You think maybe it's tight because you're wearing long underwear?
01:49Yes, of course that's why it's tight
01:52All right, let me rephrase the question
01:54Why are you wearing long underwear?
01:56You're kidding
01:57Shouldn't the question be
01:58Why aren't you?
02:01No, it should be
02:02Why are you?
02:04Leonard, these rental tuxedos
02:06Have been worn by hundreds of sweaty strangers
02:09Yeah, I don't like my own sweat touching my skin
02:11How do you think I feel about theirs?
02:14Why don't you slip this on?
02:15Said the hangman offering a noose
02:19Well, that wasn't as entertaining as when he rents bowling shoes
02:22But he was right up there
02:24Well, that's it
02:25My orders have been rescinded
02:28I am officially no go to space
02:30I'm sorry, Howard
02:31But I gotta tell you
02:32I'm a little relieved you're not going
02:33Why?
02:35Come on
02:35You were gonna go up in a rocket
02:36Designed in the 1960s by the Russians
02:39Yeah, so?
02:40When was the last time you were at Best Buy
02:42And heard someone say
02:42Ooh, check out this Blu-ray player
02:44It must be good
02:44It was built in Russia
02:48Well, their technology isn't that bad
02:50When you come back to Earth in a Soyuz capsule
02:53You free fall from space at 500 miles per hour
02:56And the only thing that slows you down
02:58Is a little parachute that pops out
02:59Right before you crash into the ground
03:01And the whole thing was designed by the same brilliant minds
03:03Who are unable to capture Rocky and Bullwinkle
03:08Right, well, whatever
03:10I wasn't worried
03:11You weren't?
03:12Okay, let me explain the difference between you and me
03:15You watch Star Trek
03:17I live it
03:21Oh, please
03:22I don't remember the episode of Star Trek
03:23Where the guy never goes to space
03:25And brags about it in a tuxedo store
03:26Make all the jokes you want
03:29But there's only one of us here brave enough
03:31To almost do what I almost did
03:34That's much better
03:38You must be burning up
03:40A little
03:41But not more than your urethras will be
03:43After whatever's in those pants swims up them
03:48Well
03:48I cut quite the dashing yet hygienic figure, don't I?
03:52I look like the Flash about to get married
03:58Oh, a tissue, a tissue
04:00Oh, good lord
04:03Where's he going?
04:04He keeps emergency Purell in the car
04:06Keys, keys, keys
04:12Hey, you
04:12Before I come in, you should know
04:14I have gas
04:17For the record, not your worst opening line
04:19Check it out
04:20It's the gas I use in my free electron laser
04:22To support high voltages
04:23But it also has an interesting secondary use
04:28Here, read this in
04:29But before I do it
04:31If you're a cop, you have to tell me, right?
04:34Just try it
04:38What's it supposed to
04:39Oh my god, this is so
04:46You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch
04:50Okay, me, me, me
04:53Leonard, I am your father
04:58I have never been more attracted to a woman
05:00Who sounds like a man in my life
05:07Hey, you know how we've been taking things slow?
05:11Mm-hmm
05:11Well, I've been thinking
05:13And maybe I'm ready to take things a little faster
05:17Oh, great
05:19Mm-hmm
05:20I promise, after waiting four months
05:22Fast is what you're gonna get
05:25Yeah, just one thing
05:28Look, we're in a really great place right now
05:30And I don't wanna do anything that will make stuff all weird again
05:32So we won't let it get weird
05:34Okay
05:34Oh, and just a heads up
05:36Since last time you saw me naked
05:38I got a cookie monster tattoo
05:39The acceptable responses when you see it are awesome or nothing
05:43What about cookies?
05:53Amy?
05:54Amy?
05:55Amy?
05:587 o'clock, right on time
06:00It's not an accident
06:03I waited outside your door for 20 minutes
06:06Well, dinner's almost ready
06:08I must say
06:09I was surprised you chose to spend our date night in your apartment
06:12But as I mentioned
06:13The Pasadena City Council is debating longer crosswalk times
06:17And later the Lego store is having a midnight madness sale
06:21You ask anyone, that's a hot date
06:24Tempting choices
06:25But I have something special planned for tonight
06:27What can be more special than having an adequate amount of time
06:30To cross the street
06:31On your way to buy a tiny Lego Indiana Jones
06:35With our friends moving forward in their relationships
06:37I have decided that we should make progress in ours as well
06:40Oh, dear lord
06:42Two years ago, we didn't even know each other
06:44And now, I'm in your apartment after dark
06:49How much faster can this thing go?
06:52I had a feeling you'd be reluctant
06:53Which is why I'm going to dip into my neurobiological bag of tricks
06:56Oh, you brain monkeys kill me
06:59Dip away
07:01I've devised an experiment
07:02That I believe will increase your feelings for me
07:05In an accelerated time frame
07:06And how do you propose to do that?
07:09I hope you're not thinking about some sort of LSD thought control
07:12Because there's only one mind-expanding drug that this man enjoys
07:15And that's called school
07:18Human beings form emotional attachments as they grow up
07:21In your case, to your mother, superheroes, etc
07:24I'm going to attempt an experiment
07:26That will get you to transfer those feelings to me
07:29Well, seems what's on the menu tonight
07:31Is malarkey with a big side of poppycock
07:35We'll see
07:35Let's start with a little romantic dinner music, shall we?
07:42Super Mario Brothers theme
07:44Yes
07:46I see what you're doing
07:48You're attempting to build on the work of Ebbinghaus
07:50By triggering an involuntary memory of me playing that game
07:54Admittedly, the happiest 600 hours of my childhood
07:58But it won't work
07:59Fine
08:00There's no reason we still can't have a lovely dinner
08:02Why don't you have a seat?
08:09May I offer you something to drink?
08:11You know I don't drink
08:12Not even strawberry quick
08:16I love strawberry quick
08:19It's my favorite pink fluid
08:22Narrowly beating out Pepto-Bismol
08:25Oh, I know
08:26I think it will go nicely
08:28With what I have prepared
08:31For dinner
08:32Spaghetti with little pieces of hot dog cut up in it
08:36Just like your mommy used to make
08:38Yummy, yummy
08:40We should do this more often
08:50Uh-oh
08:53I'm sorry
08:54I did
08:55I crossed a line
08:55I didn't mean to
08:56Who says something like that
08:58Right in the middle of sex?
08:59I don't know
08:59It just came out
09:00People say weird things during sex all the time
09:02Okay
09:03Well, they sure as hell don't say that
09:05It's the heat of the moment
09:06No, the heat of the moment is
09:07Oh, yeah, just like that
09:09Not, will you marry me?
09:13I'm sorry
09:14Just give me another chance
09:15Why?
09:16So you can crawl under the covers and go
09:17Hey, baby, you want to go look for houses and neighborhoods with good schools?
09:22Again, I'm sorry
09:23You know, with Howard and Bernadette getting married
09:26I got caught up in a little wedding fever
09:27I take it back
09:29You can't take something like that back
09:31I mean, what are we even supposed to do now?
09:33Okay
09:33At some point, we'll look back
09:36And this is going to be a funny story
09:38Why don't we just start doing that now?
09:41You're kidding
09:42Well
09:44Do you remember
09:47That time
09:48When I proposed to you in bed
09:52And you were all like
09:53What are you doing?
09:56That was so funny
09:59So funny
10:02It's not funny
10:04Give it a minute
10:08That little smile I see there
10:10I should go
10:15Hey, I was thinking
10:16For our first dance at the wedding
10:18What if we learned the final number from Dirty Dancing?
10:22You're kidding
10:23No, come on
10:25How cool would that be?
10:27Me running into your arms
10:31You lifting me up into the air
10:35You're in a good mood
10:36Yeah, well, why wouldn't I be?
10:38I'm marrying the girl of my dreams
10:40And finally got my mother to agree not to come on our honeymoon
10:45Oh, hang on
10:48It's NASA
10:50Walwitz
10:51Oh, hi Dave
10:52What's up?
10:56No kidding
10:56Really?
10:58Well, that's great news
11:02Great, great news
11:05All right
11:06I'll watch my email for the details
11:10Okay
11:10Talk soon
11:13That's so great
11:14It looks like I'm going into space after all
11:19Howie, that's wonderful
11:21Uh-huh, wonderful
11:24Yay
11:29What happened?
11:30I thought they canceled your mission
11:32They did
11:33But NASA really wants my telescope up on the space station
11:37So they're putting me on an earlier launch
11:40When?
11:41A week from Friday
11:43What?
11:45We're getting married that Sunday
11:47You're right
11:48Wait, I can't go to space
11:51I have to get married
11:53No one can say that's not a good reason
11:54I'll call them back
11:58Wait, I don't want to be the one who stands in your way
12:00Well, too bad
12:01You already did
12:01It's a done deal
12:02Oh, well
12:02But I forgive you
12:04No, that's not how I want to start our marriage
12:06Killing your dream
12:08We'll have the wedding when you get back
12:10No, but what about all the plans and the guests?
12:14Well, call them
12:15Although my dad's going to go a little nutso over losing his deposits
12:20You're right
12:20He is
12:23Your dad's going to be furious
12:25There's no way he's going to let us postpone this wedding
12:27Well, we tried
12:30I'll talk to him
12:31He won't say no to his little girl
12:32No, I should talk to him
12:36Man to man
12:38Howie, my dad could be a bully
12:39He's going to make you cancel your space flight
12:41We can only hope that he doesn't
12:47Bishop to Queen 4, level 2
12:52Check
12:53Sheldon
12:55Knight takes Bishop
12:57You all right?
12:59I'm fine
13:01Are you?
13:02You left your queen exposed from above
13:04You trapped your knight in the corner
13:06And you keep sighing and saying
13:07Why me?
13:11Very well
13:12Can I ask you a question about women?
13:17I got you that book last year
13:19Wasn't everything in there?
13:21No, I'm having a relationship problem with Amy
13:25And by the way, that book gave me nightmares
13:29Well, if it makes you feel any better, I screwed things up pretty good with Penny
13:33Look at us, Leonard
13:35Engaging in the social convention of men bellyaching about their old ladies
13:40I guess we are
13:41So
13:43What's going on?
13:45Believe it or not
13:46Amy has embarked on a campaign to increase my feelings for her
13:51By making me happy
13:55I'm sorry, that must be very difficult for you
13:59It's awful
13:59This morning, she arranged for me to be an Amtrak junior conductor for the day
14:05It's usually only open to children
14:07She got them to make an exception
14:10Shame on her
14:12They let me blow the whistle, Leonard
14:16She's good
14:17I know
14:18And it gets worse
14:20Her efforts are causing me to have affectionate feelings for her
14:24At inappropriate times
14:29You mean, like, in bed or in the shower?
14:32No
14:33Would you please stop referencing that infernal book?
14:37For example, this morning
14:39I was calculating the random motion of virtual particles in a vacuum
14:43When suddenly, the particles morphed into an image of Amy's dandruff
14:53Gently cascading down onto her pale, slightly hunched shoulders
14:58Oh, what has that vixen done to me, Leonard?
15:02How do I make it stop?
15:04Well, if you had a physical relationship, I'd say propose during sex
15:08Turns out that's a real mood killer
15:11I assume we're talking about you now?
15:13Yeah
15:13So that's how this works?
15:15I complain, and then you complain, and no one offers any solutions?
15:20Pretty much
15:23Well, no wonder the women are winning
15:29Mr. Rostenkowski, are you busy?
15:31I'm just looking at some old pictures
15:33Come on in
15:34Family pictures?
15:35Oh, holy crap, that's a dead person
15:38Last murder case before I retired
15:41How many bodies do you see there?
15:44Careful
15:44It's a trick question
15:47I'm not sure
15:49Eh, you'll never get it
15:50It's a fraction
15:54How about that?
15:55Anyway, sir, I need to talk to you about something
15:59Won't I?
16:02No, thank you, I'm allergic
16:04Oh, sure
16:05My partner used to have that
16:07He's dead now
16:11From nuts?
16:12No, his wife shot him
16:15But she was nuts
16:16So in a way
16:19Nice story
16:20Anyway
16:22The reason I wanted to talk to you is
16:24NASA has moved up my launch to the International Space Station
16:29Yeah, so?
16:30So, the date is going to conflict with me marrying your daughter
16:35Now, I know what you're going to say
16:37I made a commitment to Bernadette and to your family
16:39And I've got a hell of a lot of nerve coming in here
16:42And demanding that we postpone this thing
16:43Well, message heard and understood
16:45Mission canceled
16:46Thank you
16:48Where are you going?
16:50Well, I'm sorry
16:51May I be excused?
16:53No, you may not
16:55Let me tell you something
16:56When I first met you
16:57You just going to stand there?
17:01I'm sorry
17:01I didn't know
17:02Is this going to...
17:03Well, I should sit
17:04May I be?
17:05Well, I'll just sit
17:08When I first met you
17:10I didn't like you
17:13I'm aware of that, sir
17:15But then you and I had some time together
17:17Uh-huh
17:19It did not get better
17:22Right
17:23Right
17:23That silly beetle haircut
17:25And you riding around on a red Vespa
17:29And you're still living at home with your mother
17:32To be honest
17:33I thought Bernadette chose you to punish me
17:37But then I heard about your astronaut thing
17:40And I realized
17:42I judged you too fast
17:44Maybe you are the right guy for my little girl
17:47Oh, I am
17:48And just so you know
17:50I'd still be an astronaut
17:51Even if I didn't go to space
17:52You know, I've got an ID card
17:54And a NASA golf shirt
17:56No, no
17:57You gotta go
17:57You can't turn down an opportunity like this
18:00No, but what about the wedding?
18:02And all the money you put down for the reception
18:04You let me worry about that
18:06You go up to that space station
18:08And you make me proud
18:15Um, okay
18:17You got a problem with that?
18:19All right, look
18:20I'm gonna level with you
18:21I'm terrified about going into space
18:25What if I don't make it back?
18:28It's gonna be okay, son
18:32You really think so?
18:34Of course
18:35A pretty girl like Bernadette
18:38She'll find a new guy
18:47Hey
18:47Hey
18:49Off to work?
18:50Yeah
18:51Have a nice night
18:52Okay, you too
18:55Penny, but just wait
18:57I've been thinking about what I said
18:59When we were in bed the other night
19:00Yeah, I've been thinking about it, too
19:03I noticed you never answered me
19:06You're right
19:13No
19:16Uh, follow-up
19:17Are we still dating?
19:18Yep
19:19Is it still weird because I proposed?
19:21Yeah
19:23I have a couple more quick questions
19:25You want to call me from the car?
19:26No
19:29I played that for 12
19:44Hello, Leonard
19:46What are you doing?
19:47We're playing doctor
19:50Star Trek style
19:54I'm in hell, Leonard
19:58Don't stop
20:02I'm in hell
20:03Come in
20:27Can
20:27We
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