Family Guy - Season 23 Episode 17 Karenheit 451
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
#EnglishMovie #cdrama #drama #engsub #chinesedramaengsub #movieshortfull
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00:01It seems today that all you see is violence in movies and sex on TV.
00:08But where are those good old-fashioned values on which we used to rely?
00:14Lucky is a family guy. Lucky is a man who has a human hand.
00:21All the things that make us laugh and cry.
00:25He's a family guy!
00:36Hey, Brian, could you read Stewie his bedtime story tonight?
00:39I'm watching the Hot Ones episode where the wings fell on the floor.
00:42Jesse Plemons ate one with lint on it.
00:45Hey, when life gives you Plemons.
00:47Yes? And?
00:50I thought the beginning was clever enough to carry the day.
00:55Would have preferred a claw retraction on that tuck-in, but you're new at this.
01:00Okay, tonight I'm gonna read you Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
01:04It was my favorite book when I was a kid.
01:06Pup. Pup means dog kid.
01:08Fine, since I was a pup.
01:10Correct.
01:11Mr. and Mrs. Bucket have a small boy named Charlie, who, by the way, is trans, not that it matters.
01:16He slash his grandparents all sleep on the same cruelty-free mattress because they are otherwise unhoused.
01:23What the hell?
01:24Where's the Chalamet, Bri? Get to the Chalamet!
01:26The Gobstoppers are vegan?
01:28After falling in the Chocolate River, Augustus Gloop apologizes for doing blackface?
01:33Why did they change all this stuff?
01:35My God, this is the worst day since 9-11!
01:38Hey guys, we're out of dry food.
01:40Brian, they just knocked down the World Trade Centers.
01:43Oh.
01:44Did they also knock down the Petco?
01:52Hey, you guys heard about this Hamilton thing?
01:54The iconic musical that sold out theaters across the globe? Yeah, we've heard about it.
01:58It's the Founding Fathers.
02:00But they rap.
02:02Officer Swanson, there's an illegal underage social function on Sycamore that's violating Ordinance 313. Please respond.
02:09I thought this was your day off, Joe. Why they calling you?
02:12Tonight's the night my chief has everyone from the squad over to his house for dinner.
02:16How come you aren't there?
02:17It's like designated survivor.
02:19Of all the cops on the force, the chief asked me not to come. That's how critical I am.
02:25That's sad. I'm sad now.
02:27Sorry, I gotta go handle this. You guys are welcome to ride along with me and I could drop you off after.
02:32Sounds great.
02:38Someone changed this classic kid's book to make it all woke. Who would do something like this?
02:43Probably someone who cares about their children. Add smug smile now.
02:47Lois, did you have something to do with this?
02:49I sure did. This was the local chapter of my bored suburban mom group. It's called Mothers Invested in Literary Fixin.
02:57Nilf?
02:58So you're ruining books just because you and your weak-minded friends can't handle reading them as the authors intended?
03:04Oh, come on. It's just a few little changes to make the books nicer.
03:08When did nice become a bad thing?
03:10Kids like Stewie a little and helpless and her innocence needs to be protected.
03:14Hey, could you do me a favor and not cut my sack off in front of Rupert?
03:17I'm trying to get in dem cheeks tonight.
03:19What you're doing is offensive to me as an author.
03:22Self-published author.
03:23Well, too bad because we're just getting started.
03:26At tomorrow's school board meeting, we'll push to replace other problematic books with versions we approve of.
03:32Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to stuffing envelopes with these stamps featuring female heroes no one's ever heard of.
03:38Mary Lyon, founded Mount Holyoke College.
03:41Hero.
03:42Harriet Quimby, first female pilot to fly the English Channel.
03:47Hero.
03:48Hazel Hotchkiss Whiteman, honorary commander of the order of the British Empire.
03:53Hero.
03:54Mary Lyon, founded Mount Holyoke.
03:56Oh my god, they just repeat, there's only three of them.
04:03Hmm, this appears to be a shindig of the high school variety.
04:07Why do you always talk so doofy?
04:09Language is my mistress, and I like to try new positions.
04:13Alright, I gotta go break this up.
04:15Wait, let's not break it up.
04:21Let's wake it up.
04:23Well, I guess this is a body cam cheat day.
04:26You're all under arrest.
04:28For not partying hard enough.
04:35Go ahead, pick another city.
04:37Coral Gables.
04:38Three to the three to the one four six.
04:40Whoa, yeah, cool.
04:42When it comes to zip codes, I am that too.
04:48Cannonball!
04:49Cannonball!
05:01Yeah!
05:06Oh god, that's Stacy, she can't see me here.
05:08Glenn, there shouldn't be anyone at this party who can't see you.
05:11Guys, they have Britbox!
05:12Who is ready for an eight part murder mystery that absolutely shatters the coastal community of Brighton?
05:23Let's turn this party up a notch!
05:25Ugh, I drank way too much last night.
05:37Why are we wearing tuxedos?
05:39Uh-oh, apparently we got married last night. It's all over TikTok.
05:56Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
06:02Boy, my dad doesn't look happy.
06:04But god bless him, he gave us a Cuisinard.
06:07You picked R. Kelly for our first dance?
06:09I know it's wrong.
06:10But the grooves are too strong.
06:12Guys, we have to fix this.
06:14Marrying each other was a huge mistake.
06:17It was?
06:18welcome to tonight's town hall now let's open up the floor to women with little chin hairs
06:27when the light hits it just right hello parents and concerned citizens there we go turn them off
06:36we are milf and we're very worried about the outdated messages in the books you're giving
06:42our kids why does james's peach need to be giant huh it's big pitted and we should celebrate its
06:48curves all y'all husbands follow my instagram this is nuts changing books is wrong if you don't like
06:57it just don't read it look i'll be honest whoever is angriest is going to win so have at it
07:02it's pretty close but since it's 2025 i'm gonna go with a group of ethnically diverse women
07:12thank god we're doing this divorce before donna finds out what's this about you getting a piece
07:35of my pension i offered you a prenup you declined let's just get this over with peter but the
07:40christmas cards already went out oh my goodness we really do come in all shapes and sizes
07:49now that we got that out of the way let's pound some brews
07:55we got married again i can't believe it why does this keep happening to us guys don't you see
08:04it's the alcohol every time we drink we end up doing something stupid i'm afraid that dark day
08:10has finally come we need to stop drinking and we need to settle up for the hotel let's see here
08:16cleveland and quagmire champagne and strawberries intimacy kit in a movie that's just titled movie
08:24it was frost nixon ain't everything sexual actually it was frosting nixon and it was very sexual
08:30hmm they've yet to find the title they can't corrupt
08:34i can't believe we have to stop drinking this is a nightmare look i don't like this any more than
08:45you do but peter's right either we cork the hooch or end up marrying each other every day
08:50fine but just know that even though we're breaking up i will still slap anyone who disrespects you at the
08:57what did you want to talk to us about peter i've decided to give up alcohol well i'm proud of you
09:08this is gonna change your life ours too way to go dad thanks gang but just so you know i'm now
09:14replacing all my alcohol energy with grand canyon energy what's that just endless enthusiasm about
09:21the grand canyon did you know the most dangerous animal in the gc is actually the rock squirrel
09:25that's true i'm looking at your faces but that's actually true
09:29welcome to kettlebells with stew we're all warriors here kettlebell warriors see that over
09:38there that's the road if any of you want to waste my time you may as well hit it right now
09:42all right warriors we'll pick this up next week i shouldn't have advertised on facebook it's all pigs
09:49and they want to change the books you read because they think you can't handle it so i've invited a
09:54guest to speak with you about the dangers of sanitizing books quahog's own beloved children's
09:59book author mr hillman hollister good afternoon everyone i hope you're ready to hear the word the
10:06in front of a lot of different ethnicities thank you for coming mr hollister we're gonna take a
10:10little break be sure to give your email to one of the guys with the clipboard so we can flood your
10:14inbox for the rest of your life hey brian i'm a news producer and our team loves how outspoken
10:20you've been about literary freedom we think our viewers would really appreciate your point of
10:23view really absolutely call me that guy you were talking to just ran over a group of protesters when
10:32drove off
10:33peter hey sleepyhead why are you up so early and is that fresh brewed coffee i smell it sure is
10:52also i prepared your tampon for the day
10:54wow gross thanks crap i have to get the kids ready for school relax i took care of it they are
11:03out of bed and fed great thank you not pop tarts though they are out of bed and fed yeah i gotta tell
11:11you peter sobriety is looking good on you and your liver must be thrilled hey h.r sent me to tell
11:18you that you can finally use all that vacation time you've accrued awesome there's a state i've really
11:23been wanting to visit which one oregon it's a liver we'll be right back
11:30how we feeling today boys rested and vested killing it without swilling it so what do you guys want to
11:40do usually a whole day is taken up by the drinking and the puking the puking was implied yes i'm sure
11:47we can find something that we'll all enjoy isn't this awesome what could be more fun than puzzling
11:54with my boys so nice having you together in the same bubble oh hey roberta look at you all grown up
12:03bubble roberta you get back here there's no age of consent in the bubble
12:08like all newly sober black men i have taken to hustling chess in the park i am a legend here
12:16checkmate i suppose this was inevitable as i did not know the horsey could jump
12:23now this is more like it drunk or sober watching football with my boys will always be a blast
12:31it's second down three yards to go this second down is brought to you by casamigos tequila
12:36casamigos the tequila for guys who want to buy houses next to each other in mexico
12:41hey should we do that no can do peter i'm still underwater on two different timeshares in panama
12:47city beach what how they said if i went to the timeshare presentation they'd give me free steve harvey
12:53tickets well how was the steve harvey show do you promise not to laugh of course i got so excited
12:59about the concept of the flexible family vacation that i forgot to get the tickets
13:04are you sure you want to do this bry fox news has a history of twisting the truth to fit their agenda
13:17look we may not agree on much but at least i'll get some air time to speak my piece
13:21all right but if you get in trouble just say dominion three times that's their candy man
13:25we're on welcome to hannity our guest tonight brian griffin has something important this nation
13:35needs to hear thanks for having me sean i'd like to talk about books and how the woke mind mob wants
13:41you to change them because the authors are white but you stood up to the vermin in chicago and said
13:45no bueno comrade obama what uh-oh brian's chyron says freedom crusader and there's a photo over his
13:52shoulder of hunter biden's penis i just want books to be left alone this has nothing to do with the
13:57migrant crisis you're right it has everything to do with it think about it when you go to the mall
14:02what's the bookstore called borders that chain closed like 15 years ago right we should close the
14:08borders with chains you get it by the way this is an open carry studio here's your gun ah dominion
14:14dominion to minion
14:15bok choy that's a fun word to say bok choy yeah that's that's fun i guess
14:37garbanzo also fun to say not bok choy level but pretty close yeah garbanzo's great
14:44you know who makes a good napkin ginette god what happened to us now that we're sober we don't
14:52got anything in common and why would we our group is a fat guy a black dude a sex pest and a wheelchair
14:57cuck we make no sense together i hate to say it but i don't think we're cut out to be friends
15:03peter's right maybe we should just go our separate ways spend time with our families
15:08yeah and i guess i gotta go see if i still have anything in common with other black people
15:13they stopped midway because i said pickleball
15:18as a newly sober person i'm often going to ask if it's okay that i say what a nice time i'm having
15:31i'd rather you didn't
15:32hey can i just say what a nice time i'm having right now
15:35every time we do this i wonder why we don't do it more we're doing it now
15:38yes but there should be more times of us doing it
15:41hey you been hydrating lois you gotta hydrate it's the key to stay in hydrate
15:46stop saying hydrated
15:47uh lois you may want to go inside
15:52oh hydrated
15:55hey look did you see this
16:03your book faster than the speed of love is back on the shelves
16:07really
16:08nice
16:09with a new forward by ann colter
16:11less nice
16:12and a very forward by lauren bobert
16:14when i'm not rubbing my hand over a tented khaki
16:17i'm curled up with a copy of brian griffin's excellent book
16:20and does anyone know how beetlejuice the musical ends
16:24oh my book is being co-opted by the right
16:26it's gross
16:27and it's selling
16:28it's number two on the neo-nazi bestseller list
16:30behind ben shapiro's tyranny
16:32how the radical left made me bad at sex
16:35hey guys good news the seeds arrived
16:41everyone to the vegetable patch
16:43what's going on
16:44peter we have something we need to say to you
16:47please sit down
16:48okay
16:49this is an intervention
16:51but i already stopped drinking
16:53this is to get you to start again
16:55how dare you ambush me like this
16:58i trusted you
16:59and who's that guy
17:00well we've never held an intervention before
17:02so jacks is here to help
17:04i was sober for years peter
17:06it was hell
17:07every morning i wake up at home and not in a bush
17:10i stopped at red lights like a bitch
17:12but through quitting therapy and shutting religion
17:14i found the strength to drink again
17:16and so can you
17:17peter your children have written letters to tell you how your sobriety has affected them
17:22chris go ahead
17:24it's been twelve days since you took a swing at our crossing guard
17:28you've stopped asking if i think i'm better than you
17:32when i wrote this letter i knew i would be the relative reading it to you from a straight back chair
17:39as opposed to a couch
17:42this past week i've had to spend more quality time with you
17:49but you always say you want that
17:51i want to say i want that and i want you to come up short
17:55i i can't handle this right now
17:56i need to hydrate
17:57just a little agua to take the edge off
17:59no no no you get it
18:01hydrating
18:02you're right okay i can't keep not drinking like this
18:08shh it's okay baby it's okay you don't have to do this alone
18:13let's go get tanked
18:17together
18:18so you're really going to pander to this extremist conference just to move some books
18:33i can't believe you're selling out like this
18:35i'm not selling out
18:36i'm presenting my art in its rawest form
18:38but this place is full of weirdos
18:40they erected a gallows to hang barbies
18:43and look at how they're opening the event
18:44to honor our fallen insurrectionists
18:47please observe a moment of violence
18:49don't forget to hit the cops we love
18:58thank you for your service
19:02and now i'll read an excerpt from my book
19:08faster than the speed of love
19:10cut his mic
19:13we don't want to hear your racist book
19:15we do
19:16let him read his racist book
19:18it's not a racist book
19:19the woke mob hates it
19:20that means it's good
19:22republicans like it
19:23that means it's bad
19:24everybody shut up
19:31you wimps want to edit any book that hurts your precious feelings
19:34and you freaks just want to ban books altogether
19:37there are bigger problems in this world than some stupid book
19:40oh my god
19:41the dog author is right
19:42his book is stupid
19:43but that's not what i meant
19:45the first six pages are a description of a lake
19:47the sex scene repeatedly uses the word honkers
19:50there's a map at the front that doesn't pay off
19:52every sentence starts with and then
19:55and then i'm a hack
19:56we got it
19:56you have brought us together brian griffin
19:58we've both agreed to ban just one book
20:01yours
20:02well looks like everyone hates you again
20:07leaving you with just enough political infamy
20:09to do five dollar birthday greetings on cameo
20:11hey larry
20:12sorry vanessa dumped you
20:14so from one dog who s***ed the bed to another
20:16happy birthday
20:17that's hilarious joe
20:28what is i didn't do anything
20:29doesn't matter
20:30the point is we're all together again
20:32but what about what you said before
20:34that we have nothing in common
20:35that beer is just hiding the truth
20:37yeah but it's how you say it
20:39beer is hiding the truth
20:40the truth of what guy friends are
20:42a random assortment of dudes bound by booze
20:46peter stewie swallowed a tide pod
20:49we're headed to st christopher's come quickly
20:51and bring
20:52to alcohol
20:54it may tear families apart
20:56but it brings friends together
21:16you
21:21the
21:25you
21:26you
21:31you
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