- 2 hours ago
مسلسل Mr. Iglesias مترجم - Episode 1
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:12All right, it's the last day of school, and we got five minutes to go over all of American
00:16history.
00:17Wiped out the indigenous people, oppressed the blacks, did some good stuff around World
00:21War II, and now the sun is setting on our empire.
00:28Yeah, I guess we did cover it all.
00:30Yeah, and even some stuff that didn't happen, like landing on the moon.
00:37I really got to get you off Reddit, Lorenzo.
00:40All right, I see everybody gazing, looking out the window, ready to go full Braveheart
00:45on everyone.
00:47They might take our lives, but they'll never take our freedom!
00:55Sorry, Ms. Thompson, didn't mean to scare you.
01:00Oh, that's not going to end well.
01:03Of course, England did take Scotland's freedom, and they've had it for over 700 years.
01:08Don't tell Mel Gibson.
01:11Wait, Mel Gibson lost?
01:12Yeah, it was kind of the beginning of a long losing streak for him.
01:17All right, bonus points.
01:19What did America have that Scotland didn't have, besides men who wear pants?
01:26This is coming from a guy wearing shorts.
01:29I got this.
01:30Weapons.
01:36Seriously, Walt, you think the Scots got to the battlefield and were like, hey Angus, is
01:41there something we're forgetting?
01:43I don't know.
01:44I got my charger and my Bluetooth speakers.
01:48What are we forgetting?
01:51Weapons!
01:54America was basically a castle with a 3,000 mile moat.
01:57It's called the Atlantic Ocean.
01:59Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
02:00Marisol is right once again.
02:02Oh, you're always right.
02:04You're worse than my ex.
02:07All right, look, you guys, it took the British two months to sail food all the way across
02:13to here.
02:14All right?
02:14They could have just called Domino's.
02:17Ooh, that's one of the meat lovers.
02:18Yeah, my man.
02:20Okay, lightning round.
02:22Who remembers the Monroe Doctrine?
02:25Anyone else?
02:28Go ahead.
02:29In 1823, James Monroe declared any intervention by external powers in the politics of the
02:35America's a hostile act.
02:36So smart.
02:40James Monroe.
02:43Yeah, Mikey, real smart.
02:47Okay, now while Monroe is best remembered for his doctrine, I think he really should be
02:52remembered as the first president with enough courage to say, enough with the powdered wigs.
03:01I mean, seriously, aside from RuPaul, who thought this was a good look?
03:06Our country was founded by a bunch of dudes who woke up every morning asking their wives,
03:12milady, have you seen my wig?
03:15I can't seem to find my powder.
03:18I cannot find my powder.
03:20Where is my powder?
03:22Anyway, we went 200 years without such a bizarre hairstyle again.
03:29Until now.
03:34We went from powdered wigs to one wig dipped in Cheeto dust.
03:42Mr. Iglesias.
03:45Mr. Iglesias.
04:00Mr. Iglesias.
04:08Mr. Iglesias is the cool teacher.
04:09Why can't I be the cool principal?
04:14That's not a real question.
04:16Hold on, hold on.
04:18Before you run off and ghost ride your whips, play dominoes on your stoop, drink your scissor.
04:23What is this OB talking about?
04:26I want you to tell me something you learned this year.
04:29Grace?
04:30You want to make me look good in front of Principal Madison?
04:34Grace talks in front of people now?
04:36I thought she had social anxiety.
04:37She does, but she learned how to talk using the computer.
04:40She's still a little shy though.
04:41I learned that Principal Madison sometimes cries in the parking lot at her Ford Fiesta.
04:52Not shy enough.
04:53And for the record, it is a Hyundai Elantra.
04:58And for the record, Grace's Wi-Fi just went bye-bye.
05:03Gabe, I will see you in my office at 1115.
05:06And some of you I will see next year.
05:08Hey, wait, wait, what do you mean some?
05:10We just became sophomores!
05:12Yep, yep, PE requirements done.
05:14Everybody have a good summer.
05:16Stay out of trouble.
05:17Don't get caught.
05:20Can I talk to you, Mr. Iglesias?
05:22Being that I'm the only person you speak to out loud, I have to say yes.
05:25I wanted to warn you.
05:28Paula's probably a little cranky.
05:31She hasn't been getting a lot of pokes on her dating app, if you know what I mean.
05:36I know what you mean, but do you know what you mean?
05:46Grace, we talked about your hacking problem.
05:48How about you?
05:49Are you on any dating sites?
05:54I have just one.
05:56It's called, uh, taking time to reflect on my personal mistakes.
06:00Dot com.
06:03Have a good summer!
06:10Oh, this is sick!
06:131962 VW bus.
06:14Hippie not included.
06:17You can put it on your dashboard for your summer trip.
06:20Dashboard?
06:21What do you mean dashboard?
06:22I'm putting this in a safety deposit box.
06:24You know, this is officially the nicest thing I own.
06:28God, I hope you're kidding.
06:32But you deserve it.
06:33Thanks for a great year, Mr. Iglesias.
06:35This is cool.
06:37Ho, ho, ho!
06:38Hey, come on, man!
06:40Let's go!
06:42I'm hungry!
06:43Well, let's go to Chipotle!
06:44Hey, you know, that's not real Mexican food.
06:46Dude, I don't care.
06:47I'm high!
07:05Tony!
07:06Hey, bro.
07:08Dude, were you just stealing out of the basket?
07:11No.
07:12Come on, man.
07:13This is the GoFundMe for Mr. Hayward's new hip.
07:16I had another bad year at the track.
07:18Oh, big surprise.
07:20You know who doesn't have a bad year at the track?
07:22The track.
07:24Well, you know what they say about gambling.
07:26Just keep trying.
07:29Yeah, sounds like your dating life.
07:33Yeah, well, anyway.
07:35My losing streak means I gotta teach summer school.
07:39Freaking sucks, man.
07:40I really wish you could go with me on this road trip.
07:42Yeah, man.
07:43It'd be like Thelma and Luis.
07:47There she is.
07:49Rookie of the year.
07:51Oh, I don't know about that.
07:53Come on, Abby.
07:54You're the only new teacher this year.
07:56If you don't win, that's just sad.
07:59But I could be the strong but tender shoulder for you to cry on.
08:02Ooh.
08:03Now I really wanna win.
08:06So, are you excited for your road trip, Gabe?
08:08Yeah.
08:09Oh, my bus is all gassed up.
08:11Got my 90s Spotify playlist ready with a lot of R&B.
08:15Yeah.
08:16I would never find another lover sweeter than you, sweeter than you.
08:22And I would never find another lover more precious than you, more precious than you.
08:29You guys are adorable.
08:32You know who's gonna love you?
08:34My fiancee.
08:45Ah, fiancee, man.
08:47Yes, that's French for don't put your fry in her ketchup.
08:53Abby.
08:54Nobody's told you?
08:55What?
08:56No relationship survives moving to California.
08:59No?
08:59You had to find that special someone?
09:02Here.
09:03Oh.
09:04I hate to agree with him on this one, but yeah.
09:07You know those, uh, those things you found charming back in South Dakota?
09:10Ah, they just won't measure up here in the big leagues.
09:13Oh.
09:14So, you two are the big leagues?
09:18Yup.
09:20Us and Ryan Gosling.
09:24Hey, Mr. Hayward.
09:25Gabriel.
09:26When are you going to start calling me Ray?
09:28What would've happened if we called you Ray when you were our teacher?
09:31I would've whipped your asses.
09:34Hey, hey.
09:35Who's been dipping in my hip money?
09:38You know, my grandmother had a hip replacement.
09:41Yeah?
09:41How's she doing?
09:42Oh, she only used it for a month, so we got most of our money back.
09:48Hey, you got another year left of you, Mr. Hayward?
09:51The only way I can get out of here without a goddamn party in my honor
09:54is on a gurney with a sheet over my head.
09:59Great.
09:59Have a nice summer.
10:00Yeah.
10:04And all my life
10:07I prayed for someone like you
10:10And I thank God
10:12That I finally found you
10:15And all my life
10:17Don't look at me, bro.
10:18And we prayed for someone like you
10:22I gotta get a date.
10:24Do you have any brothers?
10:25Two.
10:26But they're married.
10:28Not to each other.
10:29That would be weird.
10:31Well, marriage is not necessarily a deal breaker.
10:34Sneaking around can be an aphrodisiac.
10:37So is honest communication with your partner.
10:42Ah, the history department.
10:43Miss Spencer, an outstanding teacher.
10:46Aw.
10:47Gabe and Tony, also teachers.
10:51Aw.
10:54Well, if you'll excuse me, I have some letters to deliver.
10:56You'd fit right in as a mailman.
10:58Dogs already don't like you.
11:01Captain Tennille, my Bichon freeze, would beg to differ.
11:05Did you rescue him?
11:07No.
11:07He rescued me.
11:12So, Helen Stone is taking early retirement this year.
11:16And one of you will be getting her honors student section this fall.
11:19I'll do it.
11:20I can have a syllabus ready by the end of lunch.
11:23And Gabe drives a syllabus.
11:28Well, I guess that eliminates Tony.
11:32Not yet.
11:33All three of you take your lunch hour
11:34and come up with a mission statement as to why I should pick you.
11:37And I'll make my decision at the end of the day.
11:39You know what I like doing on my lunch hour?
11:41Lunch.
11:43We all know you're gonna go with Abby to teach the honors students.
11:47Aw.
11:47Well, I like to think that all of our students are honors students.
11:51And I'd like to think Idris Elba is at home waiting for me.
11:57Come on, Tony.
11:58Surprise me.
11:59Don't suck so much.
12:03You know what coach picks on you?
12:04That means you're the star player.
12:06Hm.
12:06Sometimes it just means you're bad.
12:13Come on, Paula.
12:14We both know you should go with me.
12:16No one teaches history like I do.
12:17I know.
12:18You're good.
12:19That's why I let you slide with the dress code.
12:23What?
12:24You can't hide these calves from the rest of the world.
12:29Oh, that hurt.
12:33You got your assignment, Gabe.
12:35I'll see you after lunch.
12:36I can't get my leg off.
12:49You okay?
12:50You need some alone time in your Elantra?
12:55My kid is graduating from middle school next week.
12:58And my ex-husband, the first one is going to be there.
13:01You meet the love of your life at Freaknik and you think it's going to last.
13:06Gabe, he's bringing his young wife.
13:08I've been looking for a guy all year, but apparently I'm giving Southern California carpal tunnel from swiping left.
13:15You still got it.
13:16You're smart.
13:16You're pretty.
13:17You're strong.
13:19You're an amazing administrator.
13:20Is this all a part of your mission statement?
13:23If it's working, then yes.
13:28Mr. Iglesias.
13:30Oh, hey, Mom.
13:31Great news.
13:32I'm graduating early.
13:33Graduating?
13:34What are you talking about?
13:35Check it out.
13:35I got a letter from Mr. Hernandez.
13:39Counseled out.
13:40Well, you're not graduating.
13:42You're being expelled.
13:44Well, I think we can agree.
13:46The important thing is I don't have to come back.
13:50School doesn't want me and I've never wanted it.
13:53This is a no-fault divorce.
13:54Just like my folks.
13:57So, what next?
13:59Goldman Sachs?
14:00Foot Locker.
14:01I make those stripes look good.
14:04Yeah, I doubt that.
14:05I used to work there.
14:06It looked like a fat barcode.
14:10I think you can do better than Foot Locker.
14:13You know what I'd really like to sell?
14:15Did the state of California legalize it in 2016?
14:18I was going to say custom rims, but I like your idea way better.
14:22Thanks, Mr. Iglesias.
14:23Wait, no.
14:24You know what?
14:25I was thinking shoes.
14:26People need shoes.
14:27Well, not as much as they need weed.
14:28Yeah, but they need the shoes to get to the weed.
14:34Hey, Tony.
14:36Any of your students get this weird letter?
14:38Maybe.
14:39We're not that close.
14:42Hey, can you help me with my mission statement?
14:45Sure.
14:45I can't believe I'm still doing your homework.
14:49Just get me started.
14:50All right.
14:52Why do you want to teach the honors program?
14:54Because it'd be way easier.
14:57Lead with that.
15:00You know, Tony, have you ever had a student who was afraid to try?
15:03Yeah, that's half my kids.
15:05Yeah.
15:06And they worry that if they try their hardest and fail,
15:09they can't ever use the excuse that they weren't really trying?
15:12I see it all the time.
15:13Well, this isn't about my students.
15:15This is about...
15:19Oh, I see what you did there.
15:24Gabe, I know we're competing against each other,
15:26but would you prove my mission statement?
15:28You too.
15:30Charts?
15:31You got charts?
15:34In a bibliography?
15:36Yeah.
15:36Is it tacky that I cited my own grad school thesis?
15:39Yes.
15:42Wait.
15:43Is this PowerPoint?
15:45You really do speak the language of the honors kids.
15:47Oh, thank you.
15:48I also speak French.
15:50Tu es très gentil, mon petit chou.
15:55What did that mean?
15:56I don't know, but I've never been called petite.
16:05Hey, Mikey.
16:08You got a letter, too?
16:10Ah, it's probably just a bill.
16:12At my house, we don't open those to the one after final, final notice.
16:16Yeah, I get it.
16:17You know, growing up, we were on a first-name basis with our repo man.
16:20Yeah, Hector the Collector even came to my graduation.
16:24You gonna pay that for me?
16:25No, but someone is gonna pay for this.
16:27You, you, wait up, wait up.
16:28I got more bills.
16:33We're in a meeting.
16:34Yeah, and I'm in it, too.
16:35Hi.
16:39What do you want, Gabe?
16:41What's up with these letters?
16:42And what the hell is counseled out?
16:43It's a nice way of saying to our underperforming students,
16:47dear dumbass, get lost.
16:49Kmart is hiring.
16:55Attention, Kmart shoppers.
16:57Pay no attention to the idiot on aisle five.
17:07Gabe, we are a public school.
17:09Our funding depends on meeting certain standards, grades,
17:12discipline, attendance levels.
17:14And the easiest way to improve those averages
17:16is to counsel out the kids who are hurting the numbers.
17:19What do you call this program?
17:21Some children left behind?
17:24I don't hate it.
17:30This program could make our school the educational pearl
17:33of the district.
17:35Yeah.
17:37I gotta do a swipe left on a bunch of kids.
17:42What swipe left?
17:46The story of my damn life.
17:53Uh, Mr. Hayward.
17:54Hey.
17:55Have you heard about these counseled out letters?
17:56Then not our problem any more letters.
17:59Yeah.
17:59Sure.
18:01Always easier to juke the stats than reach the hard cases.
18:05Something tells me I need to sit down for this.
18:10Gabriel, when I was about your age,
18:12I got a job offer at a private school.
18:14You know, where the students wear cardigans
18:16with the crests on them.
18:18Hogwarts.
18:22Then at lunch, a couple of kids got in a little scrap.
18:25As I was stopping the fight, one of the kids hit me,
18:28and that's when I knew I needed to be here.
18:32Hit you so hard it gave you dementia.
18:33No.
18:35See, I knew what that kid was dealing with at home.
18:38And I knew what would have happened
18:39if that kid had hit any other teacher.
18:41If you had left, uh, you wouldn't have been here
18:43when I was on the ropes.
18:44You were one of the kids that let me know
18:46I was doing the right thing.
18:48Wow.
18:49I wonder where I would have wound up
18:51without you, Mr. Hayward.
18:52Well, you'd have been in some low paying job
18:55with lots of stress.
18:57Long hours.
19:07Hey, there she is.
19:08Always reading something.
19:10Yeah, my obituary.
19:12No way.
19:13Oh, they've gone too far now.
19:14You're not just my best student.
19:16You're my favorite student.
19:17I mean, I know you say that to all of us.
19:19Yeah, I know, but when I'm talking to you,
19:20I'm not lying.
19:23The letter says it's because of attendance.
19:24I kind of miss some afternoon classes.
19:28Like how many?
19:28Like all of them.
19:31I work.
19:32Help my family.
19:33But I did the assignments.
19:36I'm going to take this as somebody
19:37who could help fix it.
19:38Oh, my God.
19:39Are you going to have Hernandez jumped?
19:42No, but I like your idea much better.
19:48I can't find any central database
19:50for the kids who got the letter.
19:52If I can't access the list, I can't change it.
19:55And believe me, I need to.
19:59Wait, you two?
20:01Why did you get a letter?
20:02We're doing stuff like this.
20:06That's right.
20:06That's why I called you here.
20:08Um...
20:10I need your help getting Principal Madison
20:13in a good mood.
20:14Just get a picture of Appletinis in her.
20:19I don't even want to know how you know that.
20:22It's on her profile.
20:24Just get a picture of Appletinis in me
20:26and let the magic happen.
20:32You know, Grace, uh...
20:33I want you to know how proud I am of you.
20:35And how far you've come this year.
20:37In case I get fired.
20:41Fired? Why would you get fired?
20:43You're the best teacher in the school.
20:45Which, let's face it, it's a low bar.
20:51You think maybe you can, uh...
20:53hack back into Principal Madison's dating profile?
20:57Um...
20:57Which one do you want?
20:59Uh, Bumble?
21:01Tinder?
21:02Urban Swipe?
21:03She's on everything but Farmers only.
21:06Oh wait, she's on that one too.
21:10That girl is rocking that cowboy hat.
21:17I'm going with...
21:19Gabe.
21:21Motherflowers!
21:23I mean, uh...
21:25Congratulations, Gabe.
21:27I just...
21:28You know...
21:29Wow!
21:32Yeah, Abby, that's the way you should never try your hardest.
21:38Whew!
21:39Yay me!
21:41What's the matter, Gabe?
21:42You won!
21:43I figured right now you'd be doing your touchdown dance.
21:46You know, a little salsa, a little salsa.
21:51You know, a cadaver too.
21:54Come on!
21:55What do you think?
22:01You know, I've been thinking.
22:03Instead of giving me the teacher-proof kids,
22:06I don't know,
22:07why don't you give me the kids that got the council doubt letter from Hernandez?
22:11You know, the world's worst pen pal?
22:14Okay.
22:17Carlos, can you come in here a sec?
22:21Locust boils darkness.
22:24Hernandez!
22:26Hey, we're just talking about you.
22:30Carlos, Gabe has volunteered to teach the kids we've counseled out.
22:34Marisol Fuentes is my best student.
22:35Her attendance is unacceptable.
22:38She works.
22:39She has a real job.
22:40You should try it.
22:43We're just putting every student in a position to succeed.
22:46Look, so many people have turned their backs on these kids,
22:49and I don't want to be one of those people.
22:51We're not turning our backs on them.
22:52It's turning our faces to the good students.
22:56Look, Hernandez may think that these kids are invisible,
22:58but I see them.
22:59All of them.
23:00It's done.
23:01Hold on, Carlos.
23:03Yeah, hold on, Carlos.
23:07Invisible, you say, Gabe?
23:09Did I?
23:09You know, a woman gets to a certain age,
23:13and she sure knows what that feels like.
23:16People of color know what that feels like.
23:18Preach, sister.
23:19Shut up, Carlos.
23:23You know, it's the damnedest thing.
23:25I got a message on my dating app a little while ago
23:28from this fine-looking young Denzel type
23:31who wants to buy me an Appletini.
23:34Denzel?
23:35Is that even your type?
23:37I'm alive, aren't I?
23:41He even quoted Invisible Man.
23:43That's my favorite novel.
23:45You know, I've been meaning to read it.
23:48I am invisible simply because people refuse to see me.
23:53Wow. Sounds like a real catch.
23:56And then you come in here,
23:58and you refer to these kids as invisible.
24:01That's quite a coincidence.
24:03Or maybe it's a sign.
24:05You know, if we don't see these kids now,
24:07no one ever will.
24:11All right, Gabriel.
24:13You got the summer to turn them around.
24:16Grades, discipline, attendance.
24:18No screw-ups.
24:19So Gabe has to waste a summer teaching the drip tray,
24:22and then I get to kick them out.
24:24I can live with that.
24:26Well, you live with yourself.
24:31You can live with anything.
24:36We can't save them all, Gabe.
24:38I know, but who are we if we don't even try?
24:42Ooh!
24:43He is fine.
24:47Wait a second.
24:48This is Denzel.
24:52This is a picture from the pelican brief.
24:54Somebody photoshopped a cowboy hat on his damn head.
24:57Gabe!
25:02Okay.
25:03Some of you are here because of your poor grades,
25:06poor attendance.
25:08Disciplinary reasons are all of the above.
25:11Messed around and got a triple-double.
25:17Yep.
25:17I gotta say, it was a good day.
25:20All right.
25:21So I got some good news and I have some bad news.
25:24The good news is no one is getting counseled out.
25:28Yeah.
25:29The bad news is we're gonna have to do summer school.
25:33Wait, those are both bad things.
25:38I don't know.
25:39Now I've got something to do this summer.
25:42Yeah, I got something to do this summer too and it's not school.
25:46Yay, Mr. Glacius saved the day!
25:50We love him and his hat.
25:56What about your trip?
25:59Who wants to roll around on a cool Volkswagen bus listening to 90s jams and going to wrestling events?
26:06I'm gonna guess you.
26:08Yeah.
26:11Maybe I didn't think this through.
26:15Woo! Rookie of the year!
26:18Yay!
26:19That's right.
26:20As it turns out, it's a real award.
26:25It's got your name engraved on it and everything.
26:27Aw, you guys are the best.
26:30Oh, there's only two B's in Abby.
26:34Bro, you had one job.
26:38Ah, thank you. I see you got my text, Katie.
26:41Your appletini and your backup appletini.
26:45How about you, Gabe? The usual? Ginger ale on the rocks?
26:48Yes. Can I also have a lime in it? I ain't driving.
26:52Now, not to pry, Gabe, but is there a specific reason you don't drink?
26:56Well, for being honest, I kind of like remembering what I did and who I did it with.
27:01Well, that's why I drink. I like to forget what I did and who I did it with.
27:07Don't worry. Eventually, you'll forget it all.
27:10Only the grinding hip pain will remain.
27:15Bone on bone.
27:18Hey, here's to the future, huh?
27:23Woo! Bone on bone.
27:28All right, Paula, who is the new honors teacher?
27:33I'm going to go with you, Tony.
27:37Oh, suck a dictionary!
27:42You know, somebody better teach this young gal how to swear or she's gonna get laughed out of Long Beach.
27:48I'm sorry, I'm just not a very good loser. No practice.
27:53Abby, you can bring the kids up to your level. I'm hoping the honors kids can bring Tony up to
27:59their level.
28:01Well, thank you, Paula. So, what kind of rays are we talking about here?
28:06I'm not gonna fire you.
28:09I'd do it for the kids.
28:12To surviving another school year.
28:15Woo!
28:16You are the only line by everything.
28:20And to you, this song I sing.
28:22And all my life, I miss you someone like you.
28:27And I hope that you...
28:30Love me too!
28:31Love me too!
28:32Woo!
28:33Woo!
28:33Woo!
28:33Woo!
28:34Woo!
28:34Woo!
28:34Woo!
28:35Woo!
28:35Woo!
28:36Woo!
28:37Woo!
28:37Woo!
28:38Woo!
28:38Woo!
28:38Woo!
28:38Woo!
28:39Woo!
28:44Woo!
28:44Woo!
28:50Woo!
Comments