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Watch Crap Happens Season 1 Episode 9 (2026) full episode online in HD quality. Stream the latest episode of Crap Happens on Dailymotion now.
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01:01So happy
01:02I meant are you happy with the new couch
01:05Oh right
01:07Yeah
01:07Then what you're saying isn't even true is it
01:10You're not happy we can all see that
01:12You were the only one who didn't smile
01:13In the family picture
01:15I'm happy really
01:16Papa it's so nice that you chose me
01:19But just admit it will you
01:21Admit what
01:22That you miss rapping
01:25So Tony started thinking about the past few weeks
01:38You're a piece of shit
01:40Tony Fleischer
01:44Of course he missed rapping
01:45Tony missed rapping more than anything else
01:48But he made a choice
01:50He chose Shittin'
01:51He chose Charlie
01:51And he wanted to think it was all great
01:54I don't miss anything okay
01:55You missed
01:56No I don't miss anything
01:57Everything's great
01:58My life's great
01:58Shittin's great
01:59Great
02:00Great
02:00Great
02:00He hoped that by saying it enough
02:02It would eventually come true
02:04This is great
02:05I mean I love it
02:06This is great
02:07Great
02:08Really great
02:09Quit hassling me
02:12Um
02:13I love the couch
02:16It's very nice
02:19Yep
02:20We need a solution for this
02:28I wanted my papa to choose me
02:30But that was wrong
02:32He's unhappy
02:33And he misses rapping
02:34And there's only one person
02:36Who can help him now
02:40This is Mr. Pauly
02:41Tony's best friend
02:43Please sir
02:44We're begging you to come to the premiere of our school play
02:47And give my papa one last chance
02:53No
02:58Charlie
03:00Close your eyes for a sec
03:01Please
03:07It's from Chertown
03:09Commercial
03:10Veronica Ferris presents
03:13The children of Veronica Ferris Middle School
03:16One crew
03:19One mission
03:22Tonight
03:23The event that everyone's been waiting for
03:27Armageddon
03:33Adapted and directed by
03:37Mr. Pauly
03:40Sponsored by Veronica Ferris
03:45The day of the big premiere was here
03:49Careful under the asteroid
03:51One hour till show time
03:54Not here you idiots
03:57Preparations were in full swing
03:58Check this out
03:59This one moves the asteroid
04:04This one
04:04This makes it crash onto the stage
04:07But we're not doing that
04:07Because of Kevin's
04:09Accident
04:11Mr. Tony
04:12Sound check time okay
04:14Yeah
04:16And Tony did what people in his family always did
04:19Whenever things got hard
04:33Test test
04:34He buried his feelings
04:36Microphone's ready
04:37But Charlie was ready to force him into happiness tonight
04:41All according to plan
04:42The elk is taking a leak
04:44What?
04:45Oh yeah
04:46All good
04:46Okay folks
04:48Gather round
04:51Listen up everyone
04:54We're finally premiering
04:58Armageddon
04:59Adapted and directed by me
05:01Pauly
05:04And it fills me with joy
05:06And with pride
05:07Can you not pick your nose, Claudia?
05:09Sorry Mr. Pauly
05:11It's no big deal
05:13In the middle ages
05:14Actors who failed on stage
05:15Were tied to horses
05:17And ripped to pieces
05:19What I'm trying to say is
05:22Not everything was bad back then
05:27Okay
05:29Let's open the doors
05:31Tony
05:32Head over to the control console
05:34And you
05:39Have fun
05:43I'm so proud
05:45Duff me
05:47Break a leg, champ
05:49Where's Grandpa Johnny?
05:51I mean, he said he wanted to come by before the show starts
05:55Charlie had good reason to worry
05:57The asparagus season was over
05:59But a person like Veronica Ferris
06:01Would never let a harvest cycle hold her back
06:04They've already harvested all of it
06:07Not a single blue asparagus left
06:10So what's the mayor's next move then?
06:12That's what I'm wondering too
06:17Okay, Nancy Pants
06:18Can you wonder a bit faster?
06:19Because we're running late for the play
06:20And Charlie has a tip-top plan for Tony actually, you know
06:25I don't believe it
06:26Get out of here
06:27Get lost
06:33Those bastards
06:40Hello there
06:47Apart from Johnny and Nancy
06:49All of Shittin was there
06:50Nass Mouse, it's me again
06:52Do you still love me?
06:54Please call me back
06:55I'm worried
06:56Everyone was there
06:57I always say with Dr. Snuts
06:58What you see is what you get
07:00Oh, sure
07:01I gave him 20 marks
07:03Can you believe that?
07:04That's almost 15 frags
07:06That's unbelievable
07:07Tropical island
07:08No
07:08Well, tropical island changed my life
07:10Seriously
07:11But now I have tropical island
07:14Have you seen Nancy?
07:15I can't reach her
07:15I'm Doris
07:17Hi, Doris
07:17As with every school play
07:19The audience expected nothing less
07:21Than groundbreaking entertainment
07:23Theater just sucks
07:24Yeah, man
07:25Actors yammering about feelings
07:27Theater
07:28Feelings
07:29And the icing on the cake
07:30If things went according to Charlie's plan
07:32Would be Tony's performance
07:34But Tony himself didn't know anything about that yet
07:37Shh
07:50I am the earth
07:53Long ago
07:54Back when dinosaurs
07:55Still roamed the forests of this fertile planet
07:59Stupid
08:00A chunk of rock
08:03Almost 10 kilometers in diameter
08:06Brought everything to an end
08:08Upon impact
08:12It unleashed the energy
08:14Of 10,000 atomic bombs
08:17So many wonderful bombs
08:19So many wonderful bombs
08:22It happened once
08:24And it will happen again
08:28There's just one question
08:30When?
08:32When?
08:32The answer is
08:34Now
08:40A massive asteroid is barreling toward Earth
08:50And once again
08:51Only a team of American heroes
08:54Can save the world
09:01All right, Mr. President
09:04So in short
09:05You want me and my boys
09:07To fly up to the asteroid
09:09Drill a hole in it
09:10Blow it up
09:11And save the whole goddamn planet?
09:17Yeah
09:19Great
09:20So let's get to work
09:21We have a lot to do
09:24Patsy, where are you?
09:25Thinks you're heating up here
09:50That home, babe?
09:51Mm-hmm
09:52Way to go, Stefan
09:53Yeah
10:02You first
10:18Whiskey?
10:19Looks like it
10:20Do you want a glass?
10:22Oh, oh no
10:23Thank you
10:24When I drink
10:24I turn into a different person
10:26A really annoying person
10:28Don't ask
10:29Really, really annoying
10:31Let's get to the chase
10:32Johnny Carrera
10:33Those piss-drinking Berliners
10:35Are buying up all our asparagus
10:37We can't keep up with the orders
10:38I'm going to have to start planting
10:40On a large scale right away
10:41Uh-huh
10:42We tried growing it in the lab
10:43It didn't work, unfortunately
10:46Why does it make your urine odorless?
10:49What's the secret behind this asparagus?
10:51What do you do to it?
10:52Yeah
10:53I really don't know
10:56God damn it
10:59I've tried everything
11:02I'm a nervous wreck
11:04I'm terribly sorry
11:07But please don't cry, Mrs. Mayer
11:09Maybe this special blue asparagus
11:11Only grows on our special land
11:17And will you sell me
11:19Your special land, darling?
11:23I feel honored
11:26Erect
11:26And really confused
11:28But sadly, I can't
11:32Fine
11:35So, kill him
11:36And we'll kick the family out
11:37Wow, that escalated quickly
11:39The whole town's at the theater anyway
11:41No one will hear him scream
11:42Where are you going, Mama?
11:44I have to work
11:45Show my face, you know
11:47Always work
11:48Never, Sergei
11:49Oh, that breaks my heart
11:51Don't you want to stay a little longer, please
11:53For Sergei?
11:54Please stay a little longer
11:55No
11:58I'm really sorry, Sergei
12:13Thank you, Melanie
12:16I'm so dead
12:18That was neat
12:21Wait, wait, wait
12:28Back in the theater
12:29The wise words of Michael Bay
12:31Echoed from the stage
12:32Baby, do you think anybody else in the world
12:35Is doing the exact same thing
12:36As us right this moment?
12:38Yeah
12:38Well, I hope so
12:41Otherwise
12:42The hell are we trying to save?
12:44Dude, that's brilliant
12:46Seeing Sasha like that
12:48Charlie felt happy for her and Kobe
12:50For the first time
12:53And also a little embarrassed
12:55That he had a thing for his cousin
12:57Who doesn't know the feeling
13:00Play for me, Ben Affleck
13:03Yeah, okay
13:14I think they really like it
13:19Hello, it's me
13:21I'm here
13:26Dahlia Mueller Mueller
13:29Hey, Dr. Truz
13:30Hey, what the fuck?
13:32Hey, you all set?
13:33Dr. Truz is in the audience right now, bro
13:36What?
13:36Yeah
13:37Why is he watching this?
13:38What's he doing here?
13:39What a coincidence
13:39Yeah
13:41Go out there and wrap him
13:43What?
13:44Well, I mean, since he's here
13:45Might as well go on stage and wrap
13:46Am I right?
13:47Are you nuts?
13:47Hey, stop
13:49Wait, this isn't a coincidence
13:50You did this, didn't you?
13:52What?
13:53Nah
13:54Nah
13:55Yeah, okay
13:56Hear me out, Tony
13:57I'm your best friend
13:58I mean, we haven't really
13:59Very best friends
13:59Shh
14:00I know you
14:01You have a gift, man
14:02You belong on stage
14:04How did you even make that happen?
14:06Well, Charlie and I went to the label and asked him nicely, that's all
14:09Really?
14:10Uh-huh
14:16Wait
14:17Is he tied up?
14:19What did you do, Paulie?
14:20Are you completely insane?
14:22Things got out of control, Tony
14:29Then we carried him, me and Dahlia
14:31We rolled him up in a carpet
14:33Held him hostage in my garage for a while
14:35Then brought him here, to the theater
14:43I laid under him pretty hard, man
14:49Paulie
14:50Not now
14:51Paulie
14:53How am I supposed to go on stage and wrap now?
14:55He hates my guts
15:01Tony
15:03Listen to me
15:04You're gonna get out there and wrap
15:05Like your life depends on it
15:07But I don't even wanna do this
15:09I vouched for you, man
15:11I left my family in the lurch
15:12I took a whole lot of debts for you
15:14What?
15:15That was all edited out
15:16Forget it
15:17The point is
15:18We believe in you
15:21I believe in you
15:22Tony
15:23Your son did all this for you
15:29I wish I had a lovable son like Charlie
15:31I'm standing right here, Papa
15:35I wanted you to hear that
15:39The kid's gonna be really tough
15:46You're in the way, you losers
15:47Sorry
15:49Please don't crank up the lights, goddammit
15:51Shit, shit, shit
15:53A battle of emotions raged in Tony's head
15:56Confusion
15:57Stress
15:58A touch of hunger
15:59Worry about his son's criminal tendencies
16:02He was completely overwhelmed
16:04But that wasn't the only battle going on right now
16:07Ah!
16:09Sergei, listen
16:10You don't have to kill me just because your mom wants it
16:13You're your own person
16:15You are Sergei Ferris
16:19Mama doesn't let me use her name
16:21Okay, what is it then?
16:24Sergei?
16:25Yes, but I mean your last name
16:28Licious
16:31Sergei Licious?
16:32Yeah
16:33Sergei Licious, really
16:37Wow
16:37I admire her three decade, two continents spanning film career
16:41But Veronica Ferris is freaking insane
16:44No, no, no, no
16:46The evening was spiraling completely out of control
16:48Thank you
16:51Completely
16:51I nearly missed the crown jewels, buddy
16:57Tony was totally at his wits end
16:59Thinking things couldn't possibly get any weirder
17:03Until
17:04I could stay awake
17:06Just to hear you breathing
17:09Pauly showed up
17:11Oh my god
17:12Watch you smile while you're sleeping
17:14While you're far away from dreaming
17:18I could spend my life
17:21In this sweet surrender
17:26I could stay lost in the smoke
17:30Forever
17:33Every moment spent with you
17:36It's a moment I treasure
17:39I don't wanna close my eyes
17:46I don't wanna fall asleep
17:48I miss you, baby
17:50And I don't wanna miss a thing
17:53Even when I dream of you
17:56The sweetest dreams would never do
17:59I still miss you, baby
18:01And I don't wanna miss a thing
18:12So much pain
18:24Am I dead?
18:28Not yet
18:29Yeah
18:30You cannot give up yet, Johnny Carrera
18:33Why not?
18:34I wanna join you, honey
18:35Drink, Johnny
18:37Drink
18:39Drink
18:40I guess I drew the shortest straw
18:42So I'm staying behind
18:44To save the world
18:50Take care
18:58Tony
18:59Do you hear me?
19:01On my signal
19:02You come out and start rapping
19:03Okay
19:09Crank
19:12Whiskey
19:27The reason Johnny Carrera doesn't drink
19:30Is because alcohol actually turns him
19:32Into a different person
19:34Johnny Liquor
19:35Bunga bunga, chubby cheeks
19:37A corny one-liner machine
19:38Choo-choo
19:39All aboard the Amtrak beer shits
19:41Next stop, Boozeville
19:43An antiquated bully
19:44So
19:45I'm about to rearrange your teeth, sucker
19:49And a brutal fighter
19:52Time to die, sucker
20:02Melanie
20:04Oh, yeah
20:06Oh, yeah
20:07Next stop, yeah
20:08Come on
20:11Oh, yeah
20:12Oh, yeah
20:13Oh, yeah
20:25All the fighting
20:26Has reduced the alcohol
20:29In my blood
20:30I need to keep drinking
20:32Or I won't be able to fight
20:34I need whiskey
20:36To survive
20:44I was the one who called
20:45About the duck in the tree
20:5124-hour towing service
20:53Fleischer
20:53A duck is stuck in the tree
20:55A duck is stuck in the tree
21:23To complete my mission
21:25A person who hasn't always been nice to their son
21:27But this person has learned their lesson tonight
21:31I've been an awful mother
21:33No
21:35Uh, nope
21:36No, no
21:37I knew you loved me deep down, Papa
21:39Shut it, Kevin
21:42I actually mean
21:44Tony
21:45Tony's mind was racing
21:46If he goes out there now and raps and it works
21:49He'll lose Charlie
21:50Because Charlie and rap can't work
21:52But if he doesn't go out there
21:53He'll never be happy
21:54Because Tony without rap doesn't work either
21:56Shh
21:56And what are you even supposed to rap for
21:58A tied-up record label boss anyway
22:00What are you doing?
22:00It's too much pressure
22:02Just keep acting
22:05Tony has to come on stage and rap
22:08Get that out
22:10Or Harry's stampin' will be done for good
22:16Hey!
22:22Get your hands off my papa
22:23Oh
22:45Well
22:51Well
22:51Guess you could say he got stamped out
22:53Shut it, Johnny
22:54Okay
22:57Wait, you were tied up, right?
22:59How did you free yourself?
23:00I've been married 20 years
23:01I'm an expert in bondage
23:03Sergei, you're right
23:04Your mother should be with you when you
23:07Goddammit
23:12You'll never take me alive
23:17What a graceful way to make an exit
23:20We have to follow her
23:21Can we do that later?
23:23If we hurry, we might make it in time to catch the finale at the theater
23:27Sounds good
23:31Come on, Tony
23:32You're scaring the children
23:35And in that moment, Charlie and Tony operated like father and son for the first time
23:40Papa?
23:42Telepathically
23:43Papa?
23:44Huso?
23:44Is that you?
23:45What?
23:46No, it's Charlie
23:48Who's Huso?
23:49Uh, never mind
23:50How can I hear your thoughts?
23:52We're communicating telepathically
23:53Wow, really?
23:54Cool
23:57Okay, first of all
23:58You're grounded for kidnapping a record label boss
24:01Yeah, okay, okay
24:03Now get out there and rap
24:05But what do we do if I make it and my career takes off?
24:08What about us?
24:09I won't have any time
24:10I know
24:11It'll be fucking exhausting
24:13Papa, we'll figure it out together
24:17Grandma likes the idea, too
24:21Do something right for once, kid
24:23Go out there and rap
24:53Mom
24:56Blue
25:00Uh, oh yeah
25:04Straight out of shitting
25:06They said I'd never make it with the rhymes that I've written
25:08On the microphone
25:10Escaping where I'm from
25:11And then
25:11That's when the fame and money would come
25:13And yet
25:14I thought my life was much harder
25:16But nothing could prepare me
25:17For being a father
25:19Can you understand the plight
25:21Of becoming a parent overnight
25:23Without a game plan
25:25How could I do this?
25:26My stepfather's younger than me
25:28I insist
25:29A real kooky dude
25:30Sick motherfucker
25:31You might call him a schmuck
25:33But me, I call him papa
25:34Take care of others
25:35Is what you gotta do
25:36But living for myself
25:38Is all that I knew
25:39It's like
25:39On this planet
25:40Is where I landed
25:42Orbiting around myself
25:43God damn it
25:44All I wanted was to fan for myself
25:48I wouldn't listen to no one else
25:54We're all alone together
25:56The human race
25:59On this lonely trip through outer space
26:03On this lonely trip through outer space
26:09I used to think shitting was really a dump
26:12Until I realized it's the people that makes my heart pump
26:15Paulie
26:15You're the biggest clown in town
26:17But truth is
26:18You're the best friend that I've found
26:20Karo
26:20Your next wedding I'll be rapping a song
26:22And Kaya soon
26:23We'll be blowing shit up with your bongs
26:25We gotta cover the policemen's my sis
26:28Nancy's the best
26:29Fleischer's never snitch
26:30And you're my brother-in-law
26:32I'm now admitting
26:33You're the number one best dentist in shitting
26:35And I miss her
26:36Although mama is gone
26:38But her nagging and bitching ghost still carries on
26:40Kaya
26:41From shitting I tried to flee
26:43Cause I left shitting
26:44Shitting never left me
26:45And who'd have thought
26:46That I could ever be a dad
26:48So on your feet shitting
26:49Let's give Charlie a hand
26:51All I wanted was to fan for myself
26:56I wouldn't listen to no one else
27:00We're all alone together
27:03The human race
27:05On this lonely trip through outer space
27:09On this lonely trip through outer space
27:18Wow
27:37Everyone cheered for Tony
27:39The entire town
27:42And his family
27:49Family
27:50My family
27:53My family is dead
27:55Because of Tony
27:57Tony
28:00Time for revenge
28:10Whoa
28:12What?
28:14Shit
28:17Papa?
28:25Papa?
28:27Papa?
28:35Teddy bear
28:38What a perfect evening
28:41And we owe all of it
28:42To only one person
28:45Polly
28:46What?
28:47Polly
28:48That play was f***ing wonderful
28:52Thank you
28:53I mean you directed it
28:54Acted in it
28:55You sang
28:55The genius of shitting
28:57Polly
28:58Polly
28:59Polly
29:00Polly
29:01Polly
29:02Polly
29:03Polly
29:04Polly
29:05Polly
29:05Polly
29:06Polly
29:06Hello
29:07Hello
29:08Hello guys
29:09Can I just
29:10Oh yeah of course
29:12Best friend
29:17Dr. Truce
29:18Mmhmm
29:19Did I pull it off?
29:24Of course
29:27I'll see you Monday
29:29In the studio
29:31Okay
29:32Let's go to the junkyard
29:33Y'all
29:34Let's fight
29:35To blow up
29:36Yeah
29:44Well you did it
29:49I'm proud of you
29:50Dad
29:53Thank you
29:54For everything
29:59Sorry
30:00It's okay
30:01Sorry
30:01Sorry
30:01It's good
30:02It's good
30:04Let's get you home now champ
30:05Don't call me that
30:17That should do it
30:20Yep
30:21That's how the story ended
30:24After that
30:25It was your typical ever after
30:26Tony was successful
30:27Had a great time with Charlie
30:28Lived a long life
30:29Had 30 or so grandkids
30:30Did a lot for the duck population
30:32In Brandenburg
30:33You know
30:34Just good stuff all around
30:35As president of the
30:36Tony Fleischer Foundation
30:37For Waterbirds
30:38And the German Rap Monuments
30:40I'd like to thank you
30:41For your attention
30:41Take care of yourselves
30:43Call your parents
30:45Be kind
30:46Tupac out
30:52Oh
30:53Oh shit
30:55Oh
31:01Shit
31:03Shit
31:04Shit
31:05Shit
31:05Shit
31:05Shit
31:05Shit
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