- 2 days ago
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00:00hey partner hey lunch numbers were good the bars up 19 percent and I sold out the scallops which
00:11I got at a nice discount from the distributor and I hugged the new waitress they're real
00:18hey guys hey Allison you want a drink no I'll just take some orange juice
00:25welcome Chris is serving drinks uh one of our bartenders quit so we're a little short-handed
00:31well I could bartend for you you know what you've been so great letting me live with you
00:35and sometimes I feel like I don't contribute anything sometimes I'm sorry what I meant to
00:41say is I never contribute anything and sometimes I feel bad about it okay that's worse but thanks
00:48for being honest did you enjoy your meal Dr Adams Sophia was great I can't tell you what an honor
00:55it is to have lunch with the Dean I just hope it's not costing you a fortune when I was in med
01:00school if I wanted a steak I had to throw myself on a doctor well don't worry my brother's the chef
01:05so we don't have to pay hell you can take a whole filet mignon home if you want do you want to I've
01:14got my big purse oh Freddie I want you to meet Dr Adams she's the Dean of my medical school it's a
01:22pleasure to meet you I love your restaurant oh my god I'd love your accent you must be a great doctor
01:28no matter what you say it sounds like it's gonna be okay quick tell me I got some kind of disease you
01:35have a tumor the size of a cantaloupe lodged in your spine see that sounds like fun we had a
01:43last-minute conflict with our previous location Sophia suggested that we hold our medical school
01:48fundraiser here next week it would be my pleasure I'm sure we could work something I'm sure we can
01:54damn I have to run thank you for lunch Sophia you're welcome and thank you again Freddie
02:02I'll call you huh I'll answer
02:06what are you doing mind your business you realize she's not one of your club girls who's
02:15gonna drop her dress just because you can make a swan out of a napkin hey the wings flap and
02:19everything you're wasting your time Dr Adams is a genius what does that mean yeah she's really smart
02:26it means she's out of your league oh is that right for your information I've dated medical
02:38professionals before remember the optometrist are you talking about the girl who wore the giant eyeball
02:43costume and handed out contact lens flyers in front of the mall yes the optometrist Freddie we're
02:52academics we're in a completely different world than you dr. Adams was on a team that developed a
02:56non-invasive method for clearing intracerebral hemorrhages whereas you took off your shirt and
03:01ran around the apartment when TRL played your request in his defense it's really hard to get through they
03:08put you on hold for hours I'm sorry I forgot my gloves dr. Adams I hope I'm not being too forward but
03:21I have a medical question see whenever I smile I get these little creases here at the corners of my mouth
03:30now now what are those well medically speaking those would be dimples that sounds serious does that
03:40require bed rest Wow I'm usually afraid of doctors then you deserve a lollipop you were very brave
03:55okay a slow gin fizz and a Shirley Temple what do you think
04:05and Allison this smells like your breath
04:10whoops
04:12Zoe where's your mother she's in the kitchen oh and guess what I almost got to drink
04:20she what I was practicing my bartending grandma tell him how good I am
04:26nunca la deje sola cuidando a la niña
04:28hey so hey how's it going ah it's going well in fact it's going very well good oh it's all good
04:46now according to our earlier conversation I'm dumb right I didn't say you were dumb I just implied it
04:56I just want to be clear that your world is full of smart people and I don't belong there Freddy
05:04what are you trying to say well I was just wondering if I don't belong in your world and dr. Adams is the
05:11most extreme example of your world then why did I just spend the last three hours rocking her world
05:20what oh yeah after you left the restaurant Celia and I got to talking and the next thing I knew we
05:31were both at her place and not talking no way did she sleep with you I figured you wouldn't believe me
05:39that's why I took this you stole her gas bill yes I did as proof Freddy don't worry I'm gonna pay it
05:54did you put something in her drink no we had a great time together we really get along well oh
06:04wait what'd you guys talk about I told you there wasn't a lot of talking right so you didn't talk
06:14about medical school what's going on in the world nothing like that no I mean a couple times I heard
06:20of talking to God oh I understand now you understand what you're a boy toy she doesn't care if you're
06:36smart hey hey hey look we may not have had any deep conversations but I am NOT a boy toy oh you're a boy
06:45toy oh God Sophia but sometimes you make me want to look I just want to get a vocabulary listen just
07:03because we didn't talk doesn't mean we can't all right I can make her want me for my mind I am the
07:09total package I'm a Renaissance man spell that M-A-N when I'm a little boy about to hate you by my mother's
07:25happy are me I'm a great in man life now I'm a man now I'm a man hello the door was unlocked oh come in
07:54i'm in the bathroom okay i'm uh sorry i'm late but i had to pick up today's paper
08:03how about those current events huh which ones oh uh
08:13oh here's one um interest rates are expected to rise because alan greenspan is so hot
08:20your pants are annoying get rid of them yeah okay oh wait uh actually actually i was kind of hoping we
08:31could talk dirty oh uh no no but hold that thought um let's let's talk about what's going on in the
08:40world okay what's going on in the world
08:46well i'm uh concerned the federal budget deficit seems pretty high yes it is but relative to last
09:00year's deficit is actually down is it yes and that includes spending on natural disaster recovery
09:08which accounts for about 80 billion dollars of the current deficit of course some of that spending
09:12will carry over to next year's deficit but when you realize that federal revenues are up 15
09:17percent it's really you know i hate to interrupt you but i think you were right these pants are annoying
09:23what round you in seven dude this virtual boxing is incredibly realistic
09:41dude spit your mouthpiece out
09:45let's go what wait and stop boxing i gotta ask you something what go go ahead
09:49great you just got me knocked out what's your record oh and seven then shut up i have a problem
10:03i have more to offer than just my my looks and my body right yeah dude you mean way more to me than
10:11that i mean you know i like i like hanging out with you and playing video games and you know talking
10:18about jacks okay not you i'm asking if you think i have more to offer women than just my looks okay
10:26am i smart enough to date smart women of course dude you dated that girl that did the traffic report
10:33she was smart i mean she knew every street in the city she never fell out of the helicopter
10:39she also called pasta piscetti
10:41so what's the problem i met the dean of sophia's medical school and sophia says i'm not smart enough
10:49to go out with her and we went out and we made that sweet sweet sweet sweet sweet love
11:00oh nice so you win but she's only using me for my body nice so you win
11:12no sophia wins celia started talking about the economy and it was like a different language
11:19i mean why does there have to be so much news happening all the time
11:22look who wants to date smart girls anyway you know i mean when you tell a dumb girl you're an
11:33astronaut she says wow and you're in now if you tell that to a smart girl she wants to ask a whole
11:40bunch of questions you know like what's zero gravity like uh why's your hand on my ass
11:46bro you've got to give up the astronaut bit i can make it where i let it go
11:56look the thing is celia asked me to be her date for the fundraiser and everybody there is going to
12:02be talking about politics and medicine and all that other crap i don't want to look like a fool
12:09and prove sophia right yeah you shouldn't go look i have to go if i don't i'm just accepting defeat
12:19okay so learn a little bit about everything so you can talk about anything
12:29uh really the only difference between you and smart people is that smart people know more stuff
12:33i thought of that but things i'm not interested in just fly out of my head yeah i know me too
12:49hmm
12:52uh what are the ingredients to beef bourguignon beef butter burgundy salt pepper ground morse
13:00dried thyme dried thyme white onions look at you you're like the rain man of recipes
13:06so that's how you can remember the news stuff write down whatever you want to know like it's a
13:11recipe oh man oh man if i could pull this off i could really shut sophia up huh wow wow who would
13:21have thought that you'd come up with a good idea that's certainly not me
13:35okay drill me
13:48test me okay i reviewed the notes ask me anything from north korea to why a fight broke out at the
13:55symphony between the flautist and the violinist the violinist and the who
14:00the flautist the dude who plays the flout
14:10you're so ready you should get out there right now before all this stuff falls out of your head
14:13really
14:18oh freddie thank you so much for having the party here
14:22um isn't your suit gonna get dirty while you're cooking well i'm not cooking tonight
14:26i'm mingling now come watch me delight celia and the rest of your kind with my infinite knowledge
14:32of everything freddie this is a bad idea hello celia hey freddie what a fantastic party freddie moreno
14:42this is dr estelle simmons dr timothy sue and dr conrad cunningham everybody this is the man behind
14:49all this wonderful food freddie i've got to compliment you on these shrimp dumplings
14:57i'm listening
15:00they're fantastic thank you you know i just read how the shrimp market really got hurt by all those
15:06hurricanes it's all global warming oh global warming
15:10you take a cup of greenhouse gas emissions a dash of increased solar radiation a tablespoon
15:21of meteorological research and hope our leaders can cook up some sort of solution
15:29very clever way to put it freddie but i'd have to add a pinch of cynicism to that
15:33oh celia i agree we can't wait for the government to step up we have to take personal responsibility
15:38i take issue with that whatever you do don't call it a flout it's a flute
15:56we put billions of dollars into taxes every year let the government handle it well i would rather have
16:04the government put that money in education oh i agree dr cunningham i mean i just read that 32
16:09percent more students graduating medical school are becoming teachers rather than doctors i think
16:14that's terrific because more great teachers means more great doctors i disagree
16:19again oh yeah we're gonna need way more doctors than teachers if that avian flu hits i mean out of the
16:28frying pandemic into the frying pandemic into the fire
16:34frying pandemic into the fire what does that mean
16:44well i i think it stands on its own
16:48but your metaphor would imply there's something worse than pandemic look we could go round and round
16:54about this but i think the evidence is there what evidence
17:04there's a lot of things that are worse i mean um a parrot had it in england that's worse and then
17:17if the parrot does it with a pigeon
17:26and you know what dirty birds they are i mean they're gonna give that pigeon booty up to anybody
17:31look i don't really have to connect the dots for you people
17:37you know you know speaking england what uh what's the deal with gwyneth faltrow
17:41she she like lives there now
17:59ready well yeah yeah i know i look like an idiot out there pigeons and parrots doing it what was i
18:06saying i don't know but some of the doctors are concerned at the end there they thought you were
18:12having a stroke
18:17i had that global warming thing in my pocket then i got greedy i'm sorry i know you're doing all this
18:23because i called you a boy toy i'm really sorry it's it's not just that
18:28it goes back to when mom took me aside after i missed you went in the spelling bee because i
18:35couldn't figure out my velcro shoes
18:41she told me don't worry she's smart but she'll be good looking and popular
18:45so mean did you miss my speech too look i just i always thought that if i really wanted to
18:58compete with you well and tonight right up until you started talking about bird sex you did
19:04yeah and you know what it's not worth it okay i know a lot about food and wine i'm one of the top
19:11chefs in chicago hey name the best napa valley vintage in the last 10 years i have no idea 97 you
19:20see what am i trying to prove we all know different stuff you're right i'm sorry i started all this
19:34you know if it makes you feel any better when we were growing up i always envied you
19:37yeah of course you did while i was out dating and having fun you were trying to master time after
19:43time on your clarinet i was going to say i envied you being the youngest and not having all the
19:51expectations on me stupid nerd dummy geek bird sex
19:57okay you got me
20:07you gonna sneak out the back yeah i'll see you at home
20:14i think this is gonna be a good one tolstoy is an excellent choice
20:27yeah that ought to do it
20:34good
20:35bad
20:39bad
20:39bad
20:49bad
20:51bad
20:53bad
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