- 3 months ago
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Hey Daddy, scoot over.
00:02Why?
00:02To make room for Mr. Hippo.
00:04No, Mr. Hippo.
00:05Yes, Mr. Hippo.
00:06Jeffy, Mr. Hippo is huge. He's taking up the whole couch.
00:08But me and Mr. Hippo want to watch TV.
00:10But Jeffy, I was watching TV.
00:12But me and Mr. Hippo want to watch Animal Planet.
00:14No, Jeffy, I was watching TV.
00:16Jeffy, stop.
00:18Stop it.
00:20Daddy, if you don't turn on Animal Planet,
00:22then me and Mr. Hippo are going to keep going.
00:24Okay, fine. I'll turn on Animal Planet.
00:30Breaking news, okay?
00:32World-renowned scientist, Dr. Frederick Finkelsheets,
00:35has an exclusive interview with an alien inside Area 51.
00:39Let's go to that now.
00:41Hello, I am Dr. Frederick Finkelsheets,
00:44and today I am coming to you live from Area 51,
00:47where I have an exclusive interview with a real alien.
00:51Now, this alien crash-landed 72 years ago
00:54in Roswell, New Mexico in 1947.
00:57Now, tell us, alien, where are you from?
01:00Oh, yes, I see.
01:02He is from the west side.
01:05Yes, yes, quite.
01:06Now, alien, tell us what happened that night
01:09that caused you to crash your spaceship.
01:11I see, yes.
01:12Yes, you were driving your spaceship.
01:14Yes, and you were spanking someone.
01:16Yes, and then it was a bumpy ride.
01:19No, not a bumpy ride.
01:21Your seat was very bouncy.
01:23No, okay.
01:24You are doing pull-ups.
01:26Yes, not pull-ups.
01:28You were clapping something.
01:30Clapping?
01:31Yes, you were clapping something.
01:32What were you clapping?
01:33You were clapping alien cheeks.
01:35Yes, you were clapping alien cheeks.
01:37You heard it here first, folks.
01:38This alien crashed the spaceship in Roswell
01:41because he was clapping alien cheeks.
01:43Now, some of you may be worried
01:45that this dangerous alien might escape,
01:47but do not worry, he can't escape
01:49because he is handcuffed.
01:50Show them.
01:51The alien got those handcuffs!
01:55It appears the feed has cut off.
01:57Wait.
01:58I'm getting word now
01:59that the alien has escaped Area 51
02:01and the police are searching for him now.
02:03They're telling us
02:04that he's extremely dangerous
02:05and we should all remain indoors.
02:07If you see something,
02:08don't hesitate to call 911 immediately.
02:10Oh, no!
02:11An alien escaped!
02:12Jeffy, that alien could try to clap our cheeks!
02:14Should we hide Mr. Hippo?
02:15Because Mr. Hippo got that wagon!
02:17Oh, man, Jeffy.
02:18Mr. Hippo is dummy thick.
02:19Should probably turn him around before I act up.
02:21Alright, Daddy.
02:22I'm thinking about it now.
02:23Area 51 is pretty far away from Florida,
02:25so we don't have to really worry about the alien.
02:27Daddy, me and Mr. Hippo are hungry.
02:29Can you order us your pizza?
02:30Jeffy, hippos don't eat pizza.
02:32Hippos need to eat something they find in the wild,
02:34like green beans.
02:35Daddy, where is a hippo going to find
02:37a can of green beans in the wild?
02:39It's not going to be in a can, Jeffy.
02:40It would just be regular green beans.
02:41Pizza!
02:42Fine, Jeffy.
02:43I'll order pizza.
02:44Just continue watching the animal planet.
02:45Alright, Daddy.
02:46The hippo is the second largest animal on Earth.
02:50The first largest is your mother.
02:52Alright, Jeffy.
02:53I just ordered the pizza.
02:54What if I want wings?
02:55You're not getting wings.
02:56I already ordered and I only got pizza.
02:58Wings.
02:59You're not getting wings, Jeffy.
03:00Wings.
03:01What's that?
03:02That can't be the pizza.
03:03That was way too fast.
03:04Well, Daddy, can I enter the door?
03:06Fine, Jeffy.
03:07Here's five dollars.
03:08Oh, you're going to pay me to go get my pizza?
03:10No, no, Jeffy.
03:11That's for the pizza man.
03:12I am the pizza man, Daddy.
03:14I eat the pizza and so they call me the pizza man.
03:16No, no, Jeffy.
03:17No.
03:18Whoever's at the door, you give them that five dollars, okay?
03:20Fine, Daddy.
03:23Hello?
03:24An alien!
03:26Oh, you want me to be quiet?
03:29Oh, well here's five bucks.
03:31My daddy told me to give it to you.
03:34Why don't you go get a hotel with it?
03:36Oh, do you want to stay here?
03:40Oh, well if you'll be really quiet, I think I have a place for you to hide.
03:45Come on.
03:47Okay, just hide in this closet and don't make any noise, okay?
03:54Hey, Daddy.
03:55Where Hippo?
03:56What?
03:57Where Hippo?
03:58Hippo there.
03:59Where pizza?
04:00Who?
04:01Where's the pizza?
04:02What pizza?
04:03The pizza that was at the door, Jeffy.
04:04There wasn't a pizza at the door.
04:05Then who was at the door?
04:06SpongeBob.
04:07No, Patrick.
04:08Wait.
04:09Squidward, final answer.
04:10Squidward was not at the door, Jeffy.
04:11Who was at the door?
04:12Squidward!
04:13What?
04:14Oh, great.
04:15One of the light bulbs went out.
04:16Let me just go get the ladder.
04:17Wait!
04:18The ladder?!
04:19Okay.
04:21Okay, let me get this ladder.
04:24Oh man, who's at the door?
04:27Man, Mr. Squidward, that was close.
04:29We gotta find somewhere else for you to hide.
04:31Follow me!
04:33Uh, hello?
04:34Hey there, I got a pizza for ya.
04:36Whoa, whoa!
04:37I don't know what's in this thing!
04:38Ah, I'm just kidding, it's a pizza.
04:40I just like to keep things fun.
04:41Oh, yeah.
04:42Yeah.
04:43Well, I don't have a tip for you.
04:44My son took your tip money.
04:45Oh.
04:46Okay.
04:47What?
04:48What?
04:49There you go.
04:50What?
04:51Yeah, thanks for the tip.
04:52What?
04:53Enjoy your pizza.
04:54What?
04:55Why would you do that?
04:56I wish I could do that, but I need this job.
04:59So, no tip, huh?
05:00No.
05:01Alright, here's your pizza.
05:02Sorry.
05:03Yeah.
05:04Alright, Mr. Squidward, I got another place for you to hide.
05:07Underneath this couch cushion.
05:09Oh, you can fit!
05:10Come on!
05:12Jeffy, the pizza's here!
05:13Oh no!
05:14My daddy's coming!
05:15We gotta find another place for you to hide!
05:20You turned into me?!
05:21Jeffy!
05:22We gotta hide!
05:23My daddy's coming!
05:25Jeffy!
05:26There's pizza downstairs!
05:27Jeffy!
05:28Why do you look like that?
05:29You don't look so good, Jeffy!
05:31Are you feeling sick?
05:32Jeffy, you answer me when I'm talking to you.
05:35Jeffy, speak!
05:37Jeffy, don't raise your voice at me!
05:39Jeffy, stop it!
05:40Jeffy!
05:41Oh, Jeffy, come on.
05:42It's time to go eat.
05:43My daddy thinks that's me?
05:47Well, now I don't have to go to school or do my chores or anything.
05:51I'm gonna go sit in the closet and play Minecraft.
05:54Alright, Jeffy.
05:55Here's the pizza you wanted.
05:56Yeah, pizza.
05:58Alright, Jeffy, now eat up.
06:00Eat it!
06:06Jeffy, you just threw up all over your pizza.
06:08Are you sick?
06:09Jeffy, I know what you're doing.
06:11You're trying to fake being sick so you don't have to go to school tomorrow.
06:13You're still going to school tomorrow.
06:14Jeffy, go to bed.
06:17I cannot believe you threw up all over his pizza.
06:20Jeffy, it's time to go to school.
06:23Jeffy, wake up.
06:24It's time to go to school.
06:25Jeffy, it's time to go to school.
06:27Jeffy, it's time to go to school.
06:29Jeffy, stop it.
06:30You're not faking sick so you don't have to go to school.
06:32You're going to school, okay?
06:33Yep.
06:34Go to school, Jeffy.
06:35Go to school.
06:37All right, Crass.
06:40Today, we're going to be learning about aliens.
06:43There are two types of aliens.
06:45Little green guys who fly around in spaceships and, hmm, you know, like, run, run, run, run, run.
06:52You know, Canadians.
06:54Any questions, Crass?
06:55Hey, freak.
06:56Bleh.
06:57You look like an alien because of how ugly you are.
06:59Bleh.
07:00What are you looking at, you bug-eyed freak?
07:03Bleh.
07:04Bleh.
07:05Bleh.
07:06Bleh.
07:07Bleh.
07:08Bleh.
07:09Bleh.
07:10Bleh.
07:11Bleh.
07:12Bleh.
07:13Bleh.
07:14Bleh.
07:15Bleh.
07:16Bleh.
07:17Bleh.
07:18Jeffy, why you throw up on other students?
07:19Crass, if you sick, you're going to go to the bathroom.
07:22Jeffy, go to the nurse's office right now.
07:24Bleh.
07:25Bleh.
07:26Bleh.
07:27School?
07:28Why is Jeffy's school calling me?
07:30Hope everything's okay.
07:31Hello?
07:32Hello.
07:33This is school nurse.
07:34My name is Chiquita, like the banana.
07:37Okay.
07:38Is Jeffy all right?
07:39No.
07:40Your baby's sick.
07:41He throwing up green stuff and his thumb fell off.
07:44What?
07:45His thumb fell off?
07:46Is he even alive?
07:47Come on, baby.
07:48Let me check his heart beeps.
07:49Mm.
07:50Mm.
07:51Mm.
07:52Mm.
07:53Mm.
07:54Mm.
07:55Mm.
07:56Mm.
07:57No, baby.
07:58He's asleep.
07:59Sleep?
08:00What do you mean he's asleep?
08:01Well, he ain't got no heart beeps, but he's still breathing, though.
08:03I think you should come pick him up and take him home.
08:05Okay.
08:06I'll be there soon.
08:07All right.
08:08He sees you soon.
08:09That's your daddy.
08:10He come and pick you up.
08:11Jeffy, I can't believe your thumb came off at school today.
08:14You're not in any pain?
08:15Bye-bye, baby.
08:16I guess you really are sick.
08:18Yip-a-dip.
08:19Who's that?
08:20Yip-yip-yip.
08:21Oh, you're staring here, Jeffy.
08:22Yeah.
08:23Uh, hello?
08:24Oh, hey there.
08:25The cops.
08:26Oh, the cops.
08:27Okay.
08:28Yeah, that's such a harsh term.
08:29Okay, how about officer?
08:30How about that?
08:31What do you want, officer?
08:32That's better.
08:33All right, now you heard about the alien that broke out of Area 51?
08:35Oh, yeah, I saw it on the news.
08:36Yeah, well this tracker here on my phone says he's at your house.
08:39What?
08:40He's not here.
08:41Well, I believe the tracker more than I believe you, because you don't tip when I deliver
08:44you pizzas.
08:45Well, I haven't seen an alien in my house.
08:47Well, I have probable cause, so that means I get to come in and mess up your house looking
08:51for him.
08:52Well, please don't mess it up.
08:53Can you do it, like, really neat?
08:54I will promise no such thing.
08:55See, look, there's no aliens in here, just my son and my son's thumb that fell off.
08:58What?
08:59Your son's thumb fell off?
09:00Yeah.
09:01And that didn't seem weird to you?
09:02No, people's thumbs fall off all the time.
09:04No!
09:05No, they really don't.
09:06They don't?
09:07No!
09:08Well, he's not in any pain.
09:09Well, that's even weirder.
09:10If your thumb falls off, it should probably hurt a lot.
09:12Well, maybe Jeffy doesn't feel a lot of pain.
09:14Okay, look, sometimes aliens can morph into people to disguise themselves.
09:17And the tracker on my phone says the alien is definitely somewhere inside your house.
09:21So I'm thinking the alien just morphed into your son to hide himself.
09:24Well, look, I know that's my son.
09:25I know Jeffy, and that's 100% Jeffy.
09:27What are you talking about?
09:28It doesn't even look like him.
09:29He's all pale, and his eyes are all bugged out, and he's got a lot of
09:32and he's got a big nose.
09:33Jeffy always looks like that.
09:34What? No, he doesn't.
09:35Okay, look, I have a test that can definitely prove if he's an alien or not.
09:38Okay, give him the test then.
09:40It's the alien test.
09:41Everyone who comes into the United States has to pass this test.
09:43All right.
09:44All right, first question.
09:45Who is the current president of the United States?
09:48Poop!
09:49Poop!
09:50Well, he's not completely wrong.
09:51Okay, next question.
09:52What year was the Declaration of Independence signed?
09:55How is he supposed to know that?
09:56Are you kidding me? Everybody knows that.
09:58Well, I don't even know the answer.
09:59Well, take a guess.
10:00Uh, 1942?
10:021942?
10:03No!
10:04I should be giving you this test.
10:06That's completely wrong.
10:07Well, when was it signed?
10:081776.
10:09That long ago?
10:10Yeah, that long ago.
10:11Okay, give him another question.
10:12Okay, last question.
10:13Jeffy, are you an alien?
10:15Yep.
10:16He didn't say yup.
10:17He didn't know.
10:18He meant nope.
10:19He doesn't know the question you're asking.
10:21It's stupid.
10:22Jeffy, we don't have time for this.
10:23Let's get out of here.
10:24Did your son just come apart at the waist?
10:26Yeah!
10:27What is he, Darth Maul?
10:28I feel like I'm at a Criss Angel show.
10:30Jeffy, what?
10:31That didn't hurt.
10:32No, he did.
10:33No, he seems fine.
10:34I think he might be an alien.
10:35Yeah, you think?
10:36Okay, okay.
10:37How do we know if he's an alien or not?
10:38Okay, well, everybody knows that aliens hate water.
10:40So, all you gotta do is just squirt him a few times with a spray bottle and he'll lose his disguise.
10:44Oh, do it.
10:45Alright.
10:48Aha!
10:49Where's the alien?
10:50I would've never noticed.
10:51Yeah, cause you're blind.
10:52He would've clapped your cheeks and you never would've seen it coming.
10:54Alright, alien.
10:55We're going back to Area 51.
10:56Now, uh, here.
10:57You cuff yourself.
10:58I don't really feel like doing it.
11:02Alright, I'm taking him back to Area 51.
11:04Are you sure you have to take him back?
11:05Yeah, what are you talking about?
11:06He's a dangerous alien.
11:07He melted a kid at school today with his acid puke.
11:10Yeah, I guess he is pretty dangerous.
11:12Yeah, alright.
11:13Come on, alien.
11:14We're going back.
11:15Yeah, yeah, all that.
11:16Today's been a weird day.
11:19Hey, daddy.
11:20We're Hippo.
11:21No, we're Jeffy.
11:22Jeffy here.
11:23We're Hippo.
11:24No, we're Jeffy Ben.
11:26In your closet playing Minecraft.
11:27We're Hippo.
11:28I don't know where Hippo.
11:30Dare Hippo.
Be the first to comment