- 7 weeks ago
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😹
FunTranscript
00:00Hey, Daddy.
00:01Hey, Jeffy, what are you doing?
00:02I just finished making my list of all the things I want for my birthday tomorrow.
00:06Okay, what's the first thing you want?
00:07Well, first thing on my list is Disney World.
00:10But, Jeffy, you're not getting Disney World.
00:11Disney World's really expensive and it's really far away, so you're not getting that.
00:14What's the second thing on your list?
00:16Disney World.
00:17Jeffy, what's the third thing on your list?
00:18You're not getting Disney World.
00:20Disney World.
00:21Jeffy, what is the fourth thing?
00:22No Disney World.
00:24Disney World.
00:25Oh, Jeffy, what else on the list besides Disney World?
00:28It's all Disney World, Daddy.
00:29Wait, Jeffy, you're not going to Disney World.
00:31It's too expensive and really far away.
00:32Well, Daddy, the only thing I want for my birthday this year is Disney World.
00:36You told me yesterday the only thing you wanted for your birthday was a minion playing a guitar.
00:40Well, I changed my mind, Daddy.
00:41Well, I guess I'm going to have to return this then.
00:43Well, you don't have to return it.
00:45I'll still play with it.
00:46No, Jeffy, look, you're not getting Disney World.
00:48You choose something else.
00:49Daddy, this is my 15th birthday.
00:51This is going to be my favorite birthday ever.
00:53And I want Disney World.
00:55I'm turning 15, which is three of these.
00:57That'd be 12, Jeffy.
01:00Well, it's not my fault I don't have an extra finger on this hand.
01:03Oh, okay, Jeffy, look, you're not getting Disney World, and that's fine.
01:05So go make a whole new list, okay?
01:08Don't you cry.
01:09Don't cry, Jeffy.
01:11I wanted to see Mickey Mouse and ride all the rides to Disney World, and my daddy hates
01:17me.
01:18On my 15th birthday, he said, Jeffy, you're a bad boy.
01:22You don't get Disney World.
01:24You don't get to smile.
01:25Bad daddy.
01:27I didn't say any of that.
01:30I can't afford it.
01:32I wish there was a cheaper version of Disney World.
01:35Hey, you!
01:36Are you poor?
01:37Can't afford to take your kid to Disney World?
01:40Well, come on down to Sam's Fun City.
01:42We got rides, we got games, and we got boofy.
01:45What's a boofy?
01:47Come on down and find out.
01:48Oh my God, that's exactly what I needed.
01:50I'm going to tell Jeffy that's Disney World, and I'll just take him there.
01:53I mean, he won't know the difference.
01:54He's so stupid, he'll think it's Disney World.
01:55Yes, he's going to save my life, and Jeffy's going to think I'm a good dad.
01:59Jeffy!
01:59Jeffy, get in here!
02:01What do you want, Daddy?
02:02You tell me you hate me some more?
02:04No, Jeffy, I have a huge surprise for you tomorrow for your birthday.
02:08What is it?
02:09I'm not going to tell you, Jeffy, you're going to ruin the surprise.
02:11But look, I just want you to go to bed so in the morning I can take you to this super
02:14secret surprise place for your birthday tomorrow, okay?
02:17Okay, Daddy.
02:18Hey, let's get you in bed.
02:20Jeffy!
02:20Jeffy, get in here.
02:21Are you ready for your birthday surprise?
02:23Oh yeah, Daddy.
02:24I'm ready.
02:25I got my puffin' balls.
02:26Yeah, and you're turning 15 years old, Jeffy.
02:28Yep.
02:29Oh, Daddy, my balls dropped.
02:31Well, that happens when you're 15, Jeffy.
02:32Well, anyway, it's your birthday, so I'm going to take you somewhere really special for your
02:35birthday.
02:36It's a big surprise, so follow me, okay?
02:38All right, Daddy.
02:40All right, Jeffy.
02:41Welcome to Disney World.
02:43Yay!
02:44But, Daddy, where's all the people at?
02:46The people?
02:47Jeffy, I rented out Disney World just for you.
02:50You did, Daddy?
02:52Yep, yep.
02:52Are you a billionaire?
02:53Yep, I'm a billionaire.
02:55Yay!
02:55My daddy's a billionaire.
02:57I'm going to tell all my friends at school.
02:58No, no, no, no, Jeffy, you have to keep it a secret.
02:59Don't tell anybody.
03:00Why, Daddy?
03:01Because I don't want people asking me for money.
03:03Oh, yeah, because you're a tooth fairy, right, Daddy?
03:05Yep, yep.
03:05So, what do you want to go do first?
03:07I want to see the castle, Daddy.
03:08Where's that?
03:08The castle.
03:10Jeffy, you didn't hear that Disney World got rid of the castle?
03:14Why, Daddy?
03:15Mickey Mouse, he had to sell the castle.
03:17He couldn't afford it.
03:18Why would he do that?
03:19Because he wanted to buy a shirt.
03:21He only wears shorts.
03:22Oh.
03:22He wanted a shirt.
03:24I get it.
03:24He wanted a very expensive shirt, so he sold the castle.
03:26Look, look, there's a fountain.
03:28They replaced it with this fountain, see?
03:30Oh.
03:31Yep.
03:31It's not as good as the castle, but it'll do.
03:34Yeah, all right.
03:34So, let's go ride some rides.
03:35All right, Daddy, let's go.
03:36Come on, ride you want to ride?
03:37Oh, Daddy, Daddy, can we ride the Gina Raff ride?
03:39Yeah, sure.
03:40The merry-go-round, that's a nice, safe ride.
03:41Yeah, let's ride that.
03:42Come on, Daddy, let's go.
03:45Hey, Daddy, look, I'm riding the Gina Raff.
03:47This is so pee-pee.
03:49Yes, Jeffy, it's very pee-pee.
03:51Daddy, how'd they get the Gina Raff to stay right here?
03:54Well, Jeffy, there's a pull going through his back.
03:58What's wrong, Jeffy?
04:00They killed the Gina Raff.
04:02They didn't kill him, Jeffy.
04:04Yes, they did.
04:05They're not real.
04:06They're not real.
04:07Jeffy, look, look, they're not real.
04:08They're fake.
04:11Stop the ride, Jeffy.
04:12Come on, Jeffy, we're getting off this.
04:14Hey, Daddy, can we ride this ride right here?
04:16Uh, Jeffy, that looks like a big boy ride.
04:18Daddy, do I not look like a big boy to you?
04:20I'm 15 years old.
04:22Jeffy, you're still wearing a diaper.
04:23Well, that's so I don't pee my pants, Daddy.
04:25Big boys don't pee their pants, Jeffy.
04:27Come on, Daddy, let's ride this ride.
04:29Daddy, what does this ride do?
04:30Jeffy, this ride, like, spins around a lot of circles.
04:33Am I going to throw up?
04:34Uh, hopefully not.
04:36I want to throw up.
04:37You don't want to throw up.
04:39No, no, Jeffy, stop it.
04:40Don't make yourself throw up.
04:41Okay, Jeffy, it's starting.
04:45Jeffy, stop it.
04:47It's not even going that fast yet.
04:50Oh, Daddy, I don't feel so good.
04:53Well, it's okay, Jeffy, he's stopping the ride.
04:55You don't have to throw up anymore, okay?
04:57Just hold on.
04:59He goes, bleh.
05:01Now you just throw up.
05:02Yeah, because I'm getting sick.
05:04Bleh.
05:06Oh, Daddy, I want to ride the cars.
05:08Jeffy, you don't have your license.
05:09You can't drive.
05:10Daddy, I'm 15.
05:11I want my permit.
05:12But, but, Jeffy, like, you might wreck,
05:14and then we might get hurt,
05:15and you don't want to get hurt on your birthday.
05:16But, Daddy, I'll go super slow, I promise.
05:18I'll go as slow as the car can go.
05:20Super slow?
05:21Yeah, promise.
05:22Okay, fine.
05:24Let's go.
05:24Yay!
05:27Daddy, look, I'm driving a race car.
05:28Yeah, and you're going to go nice and slow,
05:30just like you said, right?
05:31I didn't like slow.
05:32You're going to have to like slow, Jeffy.
05:34You're going to have to like slow.
05:35I didn't like it.
05:35Jeffy, you have to like it, okay?
05:37So, look, just drive nice and slow
05:38and go straight, okay?
05:39All right, Daddy.
05:40Yeah, just go straight.
05:41Hey, keep your eye on the road.
05:43Jeffy, you're going to hit the wall.
05:43Don't hit the wall.
05:44Jeffy, you just hit the wall.
05:47Jeffy, you're scraping the wall.
05:49You're scraping the wall, Jeffy.
05:51Good.
05:52No good.
05:54Jeffy, it's sparking.
05:56Jeffy, it's sparking.
05:58Oh, yeah, like this.
05:59Stay straight.
06:00Stay straight.
06:03It's scraping.
06:04Stay, Jeffy.
06:05Like that.
06:08I like that.
06:08I like that.
06:09I like that.
06:09I like this.
06:10We're just going to do this, okay?
06:11We're just going to keep going.
06:12No, no, no, no, no.
06:14Jeffy, stop it.
06:17Stop it.
06:18Hey, Daddy.
06:19How was my driving?
06:20Never again.
06:20Never will I ever let you drive ever again.
06:22You're never getting a license.
06:23Well, I thought I did pretty good.
06:24No, no, you didn't.
06:25No, you were not supposed to hit the wall.
06:26All you did was hit the wall.
06:28Oh.
06:28Oh, Daddy, can we ride the big wheel ride next?
06:31No, Jeffy.
06:32You can't get on that ride.
06:33Why not, Daddy?
06:34Because it's so tall and high up and unsafe.
06:38Look, you could fall out of that thing.
06:39Well, I'm wearing my helmet, Daddy.
06:41See, well, I'm not wearing a helmet, so if I fall out, I'm not going to be protected.
06:44Well, you can borrow my helmet, Daddy.
06:45But then you won't have your helmet.
06:48Jeffy, look, I'm afraid of heights.
06:49And what if we get stuck at the top and we can't get down and it's hours and then it's
06:52in a helicopter.
06:53It's just a whole thing.
06:54Well, that'd be fun, Daddy.
06:55Just me and my daddy stuck at the top for hours and hours.
06:57It would not be fun, Jeffy.
06:58I'm afraid of heights.
06:59I don't want to go up there.
06:59We're not going up there.
07:00You're not allowed to go on that ride.
07:03Daddy, in all of Disney World, this is the only ride I want to ride.
07:07And you're telling me no on my birthday.
07:09Yes, you're not going to ride it, Jeffy.
07:10Let's go home.
07:11You're not going to ride it.
07:12My daddy's hitting me.
07:14He won't stop me.
07:15No, no, no, no, no.
07:15He's beating me.
07:17Okay, fine, let's go.
07:18Let's go.
07:18Let's go.
07:19Let's go.
07:19We can get on it, but only for like five seconds, okay?
07:21Five seconds.
07:23All right, Jeffy, we're on the Ferris wheel.
07:24Can we get off now?
07:25No, Daddy, we're still going to go up.
07:27Jeffy, I can't go up there.
07:28I can't.
07:28I'm afraid of heights.
07:29Pulling the lever, crunk.
07:31Wrong lever.
07:32Wrong lever.
07:33No, no, no.
07:34Jeffy, I'm afraid of heights.
07:36I'm afraid of heights.
07:37Jeffy, let me down.
07:38Oh, my God.
07:40Jeffy, Jeffy.
07:41Dang, don't worry about it.
07:42Look how high we are, Daddy.
07:44He's stopping us.
07:45Why'd you stop us up here?
07:47He stopped us up here.
07:48Jeffy, why would he stop us up here?
07:50Oh, my God.
07:51What are we going to do, Jeffy?
07:52What are we going to do?
07:53Oh, dang.
07:54What's this thing?
07:55Jeffy, that's a wasp nest.
07:56Can't hit it.
07:57Jeffy, don't hit that wasp nest.
07:59We're up here.
07:59We can't get off.
08:00Dang, there's nothing I want to do more on my birthday than to hit that wasp nest.
08:04Jeffy, you're not going to hit that wasp nest.
08:06I'm going to hit it.
08:06Don't hit it.
08:07I'm going to hit it.
08:07I'm going to hit it.
08:07Jeffy, don't you hit that.
08:09Ah!
08:10To me!
08:10Ah!
08:11To me!
08:11Ah!
08:12Ah!
08:12Ah!
08:13To me!
08:14Cut down!
08:15Cut down!
08:15Oh, my God!
08:16To me!
08:17Ow.
08:18Ow.
08:18My face hurts.
08:19Ow.
08:20Daddy?
08:20Don't talk to me, Jeffy.
08:21Do not talk to me.
08:21Your birthday's over.
08:22But, dang, I didn't get to see Mickey Mouse.
08:24Well, you're not going to see Mickey Mouse.
08:26Why, dang?
08:27Because he doesn't exist.
08:29Don't you start crying.
08:30You've got my face stuck by wasp.
08:33I want to see Mickey Mouse!
08:35You better show me Mickey Mouse right now!
08:38Fine, Jeffy.
08:39I'll see what I can do.
08:40Hey.
08:41Oh, Jesus.
08:42What happened to your face?
08:43I got stuck by wasp.
08:44Oh, you must have been riding the Ferris wheel.
08:45Yeah, the thing's riddled with wasps.
08:47Well, thanks for the heads up.
08:48Yeah.
08:48Well, anyway, I need a favor from you.
08:50Okay, what?
08:51Do you have, like, a Mickey Mouse costume you can dress up to pretend to be Mickey Mouse?
08:54My son really wants to see Mickey Mouse.
08:55Uh, no, we don't really have Mickey Mouse.
08:57We have Boofy the Moose.
08:59Boofy the Moose?
09:00Yeah, Boofy.
09:01He's, like, the mascot of this place, I guess.
09:03Okay, well, I guess it's better than nothing.
09:05Can you do that?
09:06Yeah, sure.
09:07I'll go wake him up.
09:08Okay.
09:09All right, Jeffy.
09:10We couldn't get you Mickey Mouse, but we got you something even better.
09:13What's that, Daddy?
09:14Here he is.
09:15Boofy the Moose!
09:19What's wrong, Jeffy?
09:20I don't want Boofy the Moose!
09:22I want a Mickey Mouse!
09:24What, Boofy the Moose is awesome!
09:25Come to Boofy, look.
09:27Look, look, dance with Boofy, look.
09:29You and Boofy can dance, come on!
09:30I don't want to dance with Boofy!
09:32I don't like it!
09:34Come on, Jeffy, smile.
09:35Dance with Boofy!
09:36I don't like it!
09:37I don't like it!
09:37I don't like it!
09:39I don't like Boofy!
09:40Hey.
09:42Hey!
09:43Yeah, that's not going to work.
09:44What, Boofy?
09:45You don't like him?
09:46No, no, Jeffy does not like Boofy.
09:47What?
09:47Come on, but it's Boofy, though.
09:49Yeah, I know it's Boofy, but he really wants Mickey Mouse.
09:51Well, look, we don't have Mickey Mouse.
09:53Look, it's his birthday, though.
09:55What?
09:55It's my birthday, too, and I don't want to be here.
09:57But look, here I am.
09:59Okay, look, how about this?
09:59I'll pay you extra if you could just please find a Mickey Mouse costume, please.
10:03Okay, fine.
10:04I guess I can go make a costume.
10:06Yeah, thank you so much.
10:08Daddy, I don't like Boofy the Mooch.
10:11He smells like feet and pee.
10:12Like when you pee on your feet and you shout.
10:14Wait, Jeffy, no one does that.
10:15I want Mickey Mouse!
10:17Well, I know you want Mickey Mouse, Jeffy.
10:18That's why I made some phone calls and pulled some strings, and look who showed up.
10:23It's me, Mickey Mouse.
10:25I'm Diggity Dog.
10:26Mickey Mouse, you're here?
10:28Yeah, yeah, it's me.
10:30It's Mickey Mouse.
10:31So, what do you want?
10:32Daddy, look, it's Mickey Mouse.
10:34I just wanted to meet you, Mickey Mouse.
10:36Okay, great.
10:37So, are we done here or what?
10:38Oh, Daddy, can Mickey Mouse come back to the house for cake?
10:41No, no, Mickey Mouse can't do that.
10:43Mickey Mouse doesn't get off work till five.
10:45Well, maybe Mickey Mouse can come if I pay him an extra five.
10:50Yeah, I guess Mickey Mouse could swing that, sure.
10:52Yeah, so let's go back to the house and have some cake.
10:54Yay!
10:55Yeah, we can end this day.
10:56All right, Jeffy, are you ready for us to sing you happy birthday so you can blow out your candles and make a wish?
11:00Yeah, Daddy, I still can't believe I get to eat cake with Mickey Mouse.
11:04You know, it's my birthday too.
11:05You guys could have gotten me a present or something.
11:07I got the same birthday as Mickey Mouse?
11:10Yeah.
11:10Yeah.
11:11Yeah, well, how about that?
11:12Yeah, anyway, let's sing happy birthday.
11:13Happy birthday to Jeffy.
11:17Okay.
11:18Happy birthday to Jeffy.
11:21Happy birthday to Jeffy.
11:25Happy birthday to you.
11:27All right, blow your candles, Jeffy.
11:29You make a wish?
11:30Yeah, Daddy.
11:31Cool.
11:32How about we relight those candles and then we sing happy birthday to me this time?
11:35I'm not paying you for that, so stop it.
11:37Okay, you know what?
11:38How about that?
11:39What happened to Mickey Mouse?
11:41I cut him up into little pieces and then I wore his skin like a suit.
11:45You deal with that.
11:47He killed Mickey Mouse.
11:50No, no, no, it's just a costume.
11:51Jeffy, what'd you wish for?
11:53What'd you wish for?
11:54I wish that I could throw my cake as far as I can, Daddy.
11:58You're not going to throw your cake, Jeffy.
12:00Well, that's what I wish for, Daddy.
12:03It's my birthday and I want to throw my cake.
12:07Okay, fine, Jeffy.
12:08This is your birthday.
12:09This is the last thing you're doing for your birthday.
12:11Yay! I'm gonna throw my cake!
12:14Okay, make it quick.
12:19Okay, you happy? You happy for your birthday?
12:21Yeah, Dad! I'm gonna throw my cake!
12:23Well, I hope you had a good birthday, Jeffy.
12:25I did, Daddy.
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