Why Your Relationship Feels Like a Chase — Anxious-Avoidant Trap - video Dailymotion

cupandinspiration

Closeness scares one. Distance scares the other. Here’s why anxious and avoidant partners keep triggering each other — and how the cycle flips temporarily but never stops.  Break the anxious-avoidant cycle before it breaks you. Watch, learn, and share your thoughts in the comments.  #RelationshipAdvice #AttachmentTheory #SelfGrowth #AnxiousAvoidant #LoveWisdom #HealingJourney  ©️ All rights and credit reserved to the respective owner(s).

Transcript

00:00Here's how to tell if you're stuck in the anxious avoidant trap in 90 seconds or less. We know the

00:03anxious person is scared of being abandoned, right? We know the avoidant is scared of losing

00:08their independence. Neither is better or worse. They both don't actually trust that people will

00:12show up for them. They have different coping strategies to the same fear, which is rejection.

00:17Now, if the anxious person craves closeness and connection to feel safe, but they don't actually

00:22trust it even when they get it, if they need an excessive amount of reassurance that the

00:26relationship is okay, that neediness triggers the avoidant partner's fear of being smothered,

00:31right? And losing independence. So they pull away. But when they pull away, that triggers the anxious

00:36person's fear of being abandoned. So they're going to do one of two things. One, they're going to

00:40abandon themselves. They're going to give in, walk on eggshells, people please, abandon their own needs

00:44and boundaries because that's what feels familiar to gain connection in the past. Or two, they're

00:50going to protest louder. They're going to get more critical, more passive aggressive, more resentful.

00:53Maybe throw in some accusations and blame about how narcissistic their avoidant partner is.

00:58But you guessed it, that only causes the avoidant to feel attacked, get defensive and shut down.

01:02Now, sometimes the anxious person gets so fed up that they face their fear and they break up with

01:06the avoidant, which is actually the most attractive thing that they could have done because the avoidant

01:11now feels like you don't need them. And the script gets flipped temporarily and the avoidant actually

01:16pursues the anxious, which is what they wanted all along. So now they feel chosen and desired.

01:21They end up making up and the cycle just repeats itself. Tell me how to fix this dynamic in the

01:26comments. I bet the top comment will be, don't date avoidance.

Why Your Relationship Feels Like a Chase — Anxious-Avoidant Trap

Category

Transcript

Be the first to comment

Recommended