- hace 7 meses
KAOS has purchased 10 hospitals in the space of a month. Zach and 66 are assigned to find undercover agent 24 at Our Holy Sister of Pain and Suffering Hospital located in Washington. They take the place of two KAOS surgeons, Dr. Lasky & the Swedish Dr. Hejeighijnes.
Categoría
📺
TVTranscripción
00:01Gentlemen, this is a banner day for the Chaos Corporation.
00:05Project Robin Hood has entered phase one.
00:08Our first hospital is fully operational.
00:11Nothing will go wrong this time.
00:14Chairwoman, the only reason our previous efforts failed was...
00:16Don't blame your failures on Zachary Smart.
00:19He's just another control agent.
00:22With all due respect, ma'am, Zachary Smart isn't just another agent.
00:26He's as good as his father.
00:28Maxwell Smart and his son.
00:30They're two of a kind.
00:33Nice throw, Dad, but isn't this kind of barbaric?
00:37It's still an essential skill.
00:39Chaos loves to attack in restaurants.
00:42No one's killed a man with a shrimp for him.
00:44So what do I do?
00:45Well, just take it by the blade, aim, and let fly as soon as...
00:49Mr. Edo gets out of the way.
01:00The end.
01:00Mr. Edo gets out of the way.
01:01My boyfriend.
01:01The end.
01:01Mr. Edo gets out of the way.
01:03The end.
01:04The end.
01:04Mr. Edo.
01:05The end.
01:06Mr. Edo.
01:06The end.
01:06Mr. Edo...
01:08Mr. Smart?
01:33Trudy, why don't you talk to me on the intercom?
01:36All right.
01:44Your son is here, and he's with some lady who says she's 66, but personally, I don't think
01:49she's a day over 25.
01:52Trudy, why don't you take a nice, long coffee break?
01:56Okie dokie.
01:59In Brazil.
02:00Dad, your secretary just asked us if we were here to audition.
02:08Yes, well, she was hired by the temp agency.
02:11They told her she was going to work for an agent, and she assumed it was a talent agent.
02:15Why don't you send her back?
02:16I can't.
02:17During lunch, she read all our secret files.
02:19Now I have to keep her or kill her.
02:20So what's up, Dad?
02:22Chaos.
02:23They've brought 10 hospitals in the last month.
02:26The last one here in Washington, D.C.
02:29Chaos always did have a better health plan than us.
02:32That's for sure.
02:33It's ridiculous having to wait two months for minor surgery.
02:36Say the word, and I'll have that bullet out of your butt in three seconds.
02:39Or next time, you could just watch while you're shooting.
02:42We sent Agent 24 in undercover, but we haven't heard from him in days.
02:47Ooh, that's bad.
02:48No, that's terrible.
02:49He was supposed to give me his hockey tickets.
02:51Your job is to rescue Agent 24 and find out why Chaos is buying up all these hospitals.
02:59Actually, that's two jobs.
03:01How do we get in, Chief?
03:02Chaos has hired two new surgeons to fill out their staff.
03:06Uh, Dad, they're squirrels.
03:08Huh?
03:09Oh, yes, well, it's my camping trip.
03:13Had them eating right out of my hands.
03:15Little buggers love peanut butter.
03:17Chief.
03:17The mission?
03:19Oh, yes.
03:22Dr. Zlasky and Heinfeld.
03:25Heinmer.
03:25Heinberger.
03:27She's Swedish.
03:29Anyway, they'll be arriving tonight.
03:30And you want us to intercept them and take their place?
03:33Exactly.
03:34You'll be reporting to the Chief Surgeon, Dr. Kendall Mendelsohn.
03:39He's devious, diabolical, and a trampine bird call it a boot.
03:43What is wrong with that thing?
03:52Ow!
03:56Here come the Chaos doctors.
03:57Make it look good.
03:58Dr. Lasky, please help.
04:03My wife is having a baby.
04:04My water broke.
04:05This way.
04:08Here.
04:09Right here.
04:09Okay, in case we split up, we better activate our locator badges.
04:23And this time, keep it on.
04:24Hey, I see you, Lake.
04:25I skinny-dip.
04:26Please, Megan.
04:28But Nurse Scrum, I don't understand.
04:29I'm supposed to be released today.
04:31I've never felt better.
04:33Dr. Mendelsohn knows what he's doing, pal.
04:36Now, why would a big nurse wheel a healthy-looking man into a supply closet?
04:41Because the little nurse was off-duty.
04:45Nurse, Dr. Mendelsohn is expecting us.
04:49I am Dr. Lasky.
04:50And this is Dr.
04:53Hidja-jidja-jiggy.
04:56She's Swedish.
04:57Doctor, Doctor, Mr. O'Neil's experiencing dizziness in room 247.
05:02What should I do?
05:03Move him to room 249.
05:05Now, woman!
05:09Dr. Lasky.
05:10Of course I am.
05:12And you must be Dr. Mendelsohn.
05:14Nurse, your patient is a court-low.
05:19You must be Dr.
05:22The Swedish doctor.
05:25How's your trip?
05:25Very smooth, thank you.
05:27You know, I did my internship in Stockholm.
05:30Stockholm, Carlos for Charlize.
05:34Stodden.
05:35Oh, Narja, Serdavish, Dorje, Valver.
05:40Um, the doctor prefers to speak English when she's...
05:43Come, I'm sure you're anxious to get started.
05:50You speak Swedish?
05:56Doesn't everybody?
05:58Ah, there you two are, just in time to swap a kidney, scrub up.
06:05I'm anxious to see your technique.
06:08I'm anxious to see your technique.
06:08Wasn't that the call of the double-crested comrade?
06:12Zach, he wants you to cut off a live human being.
06:16What are you going to do?
06:18I don't know.
06:19I'm...
06:19Me?
06:20What are you here for, to sell soft drinks?
06:22Don't sweat it, guys.
06:24Excuse me?
06:25It's me.
06:26Agent Zero.
06:27Zero?
06:27Wow.
06:29Amazing disguise.
06:30Really?
06:31I don't think the colors match.
06:33Zero, we can't do this surgery.
06:34And get a load of these breasts.
06:36I think I overdid it.
06:37If we screw up, we'll be exposed.
06:39I'm losing my edge.
06:41Zero.
06:41Yes.
06:42Oh, it's all taken care of.
06:44This stethophone is hooked up to a surgeon at control headquarters.
06:47He'll walk you through the whole procedure.
06:51Hey, Dr. Hyde...
06:53Whatever.
06:54Dr. Madison wants you to help me prep the new kidney.
06:59Time is money, toots.
07:00Good luck, Zach.
07:06Luck, 66.
07:08Luck is the illegitimate child of skill and ability.
07:17Yes, Trudy?
07:20What is it, Trudy?
07:23Trudy, will you come in here?
07:26Yes.
07:27Did you want to tell me something?
07:28Oh, um, Mrs. 99 is here.
07:32And I think she has a juggling act.
07:39Maybe I should kill her.
07:42Listen, Max, I'm gonna have to juggle our plans.
07:45Ah, that explains that.
07:46Yes, Trudy.
07:52Trudy, release the button!
07:55What is it?
07:56Your son is on the stethophone.
07:58And, you know, if you're looking to sign musicians, I've got an uncle that plays a wicked...
08:03Hello, Zach.
08:06Hi, Zach.
08:07This is Mom.
08:08Listen, could you take Ginger for a bath on Saturday?
08:11She's got fleas again.
08:12Uh, I-I'm about to perform surgery here.
08:15Yes.
08:16We know that, doctor.
08:18That's why we're all here.
08:20But Ginger's been scratching herself raw.
08:23Surgery?
08:24Max.
08:25Can't you just shave her?
08:27Patient's been shaved, doctor.
08:29Please, Missy.
08:30What do you need, son?
08:31Uh, I need to talk to the doctor.
08:33It's a simple kidney transplant.
08:35No cause for consultation.
08:37The doctor's not here.
08:38He had to take Agent 75 to emergency.
08:40Something about bad cheese.
08:43They want me to perform an operation here.
08:45I have no idea what I'm doing.
08:46I could kill this woman.
08:48Okay.
08:49Who are you talking to?
08:51Uh, my own, uh, personal demons.
08:53It helps me to purge the negative energies.
08:57Away with the...
08:59Vamanos!
09:00Don't worry, Zach.
09:04Your mother and I are not gonna let you down.
09:0699, get the handbook on surgery.
09:09The control handbook.
09:10It's the blue one.
09:11Uh, the brown.
09:13Uh, red is...
09:15That's the one.
09:15Yeah.
09:16Zach, what kind of an operation is it?
09:18Uh, kidney transplant.
09:19I'm aware of that.
09:21Right.
09:22Kidney.
09:23Kidney.
09:24I can't find it.
09:2599.
09:25Look in the appendix.
09:27Make the first cut, doctor.
09:29I'm making the first cut.
09:32He's making the first cut.
09:35Here it is.
09:36Make a shallow eight-inch incision along the flank
09:39just above the small of the back.
09:42And be careful, honey.
09:43Ow!
09:44The knife is sharp.
09:54Watch your fingers, sister.
10:00Please!
10:01Don't get up.
10:02Make sure you pick out a young kidney.
10:05The patient is on the deluxe plan.
10:07Oh.
10:13I have, uh, clamped off the blood vessels.
10:17And now I...
10:19You snip the uvula.
10:21I snip the uvula.
10:23Doctor.
10:24No, Zach.
10:25The ureter.
10:26Snip the ureter.
10:27Max, the uvula's in the throat.
10:30Really?
10:30Well, you'd think they'd have the sense
10:32to put some pictures in this thing.
10:36Uh-oh.
10:37Hello, Zach.
10:38They cut him off.
10:39I better get a hold of Agent Zero.
10:41Agent 24.
11:01Remove the kidney, Doctor.
11:03Okay.
11:05Did you know that Mrs. Sieglitz
11:07paid $300,000 for that kidney?
11:11Well, that's a lot of money.
11:12Not if you want to jump
11:13to the top of the waiting list.
11:15We can get half a million dollars
11:17for a liver.
11:19$600,000 for a lung.
11:21Well, I bet a heart goes
11:22for an arm and a leg.
11:24Yes, my dear doctor.
11:26Harvesting organs will make chaos
11:28and us very, very rich.
11:32Harvesting?
11:32Or, if you prefer, stealing.
11:35Oh.
11:38Don't worry about it.
11:39The janitor will get it.
11:41I'm a fool.
11:42Wake up.
11:43Wake up.
11:44Oh, hi, 66.
11:46Visiting hours already?
11:47We'll get you out of here.
11:58Trudy, it's 66.
11:59Get me the chief.
12:01No, it's not my age.
12:02It's my number.
12:03Just get him from the phone.
12:04Sweetie, my big, hairy butt.
12:21Locator badge activated.
12:23Copyright control, 1984.
12:25You are 40 feet from the target.
12:2740 feet from the target.
12:28Nurse, have you seen Dr. Heine-Jeine-9,
12:33the Swedish doctor?
12:34No, I haven't.
12:35All right, then.
12:36Carry on.
12:38Do your nursing.
12:41You are 30 feet from the target.
12:43Turn left.
12:44You are 20 feet from the target.
12:45You're getting warmer.
12:46There's got to be a way in here.
12:53Uh-huh.
13:00Uh-huh.
13:12Ha!
13:14Amateurs.
13:14target is five feet four feet three feet two feet bingo
13:2466 you just missed her zack agent 24
13:33just when you thought chaos couldn't get any eviler
13:39I mean more evil evil isn't a word we'll get you out of here when was the last time you saw 66
13:47five minutes six hours time kind of stand still when you're missing a few vital organs
13:54hang tight buddy wait sack yeah right your hockey tickets in my glove compartment
14:03thanks 24 yeah closer in my desk drawer
14:12parking pass get to put your car close to the gate
14:18bastards
14:22dr lasky dr lasky please report to or or or that's operating room right thanks
14:33thank you for coming doctor we have just received a splendid specimen for harvest great
14:42but that's the uh swedish doctor no actually she's a control agent
14:49get out of course there's no way you could have known about this
14:54no no come on geez you you you think you know someone
15:00usually though when there's one control agent there's another lurking about not these days no
15:09no the government's downsizing budgets being slashed they just send out one agent and and you got her
15:15so ah well then i'm sure you'll feel perfectly happy removing her heart
15:22you bet i can't wait to rip it right out of her chest still beating
15:27a little she devil tomorrow morning honey you are spare parts
15:32now doctor you know i'd like to but uh i'm i'm a little jet lagged from the plane ride my head's a
15:39little woozy tongue's all scratchy like like a cat's so now doctor
15:45sweetheart your uh bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired dr lasky
15:50if you feel incapable of performing surgery at this time perhaps dr lasky could fill in for you
15:57you know that might be a good idea what we're putting you on the critical list
16:02out
16:09the way people
16:17look everybody i'm naked
16:21Look in there!
16:22Oh, come on!
16:23Come on!
16:24Let's check the other half!
16:28Come on!
16:29Zach, did I ever tell you you have really sexy nostrils?
16:36Oh, come on!
16:38Come on, let's check the other half!
16:41Come on!
16:42Zach, did I ever tell you you have really sexy nostrils?
16:50You really mean that?
16:53This is Dr. Mendelsohn.
16:54No one leaves this hospital alive.
16:56Patients ignore that.
16:58Let's try over here.
17:00Go to parking level A!
17:02Who said that?
17:03Me!
17:04Agent Zero!
17:05That is a great disguise, Zero.
17:07Look at that, from a nurse to a...
17:09What are you?
17:10Well, I was going for a drowning victim,
17:13but I guess I didn't get my lips puffy enough.
17:16No, no, no, I see it now with the...
17:18Yeah, I...
17:19Well, you know, you got the smell right on.
17:21Hi, Zero.
17:22Look, I can put my whole fist in my mouth.
17:27As soon as you get to level A,
17:29look for the control van waiting for you.
17:31Thanks, Zero, but right now I have to save 24.
17:34Zack, this is the bad room.
17:47Relax, okay?
17:48This is the last place anybody will ever look for us.
17:53Okay, next to last.
17:55I have an idea, Doctor.
17:57You give all those innocent people their organs back
17:59and turn yourself in.
18:00Sure, you're gonna lose your license,
18:02disgrace your family,
18:03and serve a long, hard prison sentence,
18:06but you'll feel a lot better about yourself.
18:09That's a really terrible idea.
18:12I didn't say you were gonna like it.
18:14No, Mr. Smart.
18:15This young lady's healthy pink organs
18:18are going to earn millions for chaos.
18:21Take me instead.
18:23I'm young and I'm healthy.
18:24Don't worry.
18:25You're next.
18:27Oh.
18:28I hadn't, uh, quite made that clear.
18:30Maybe when your father,
18:32the great Maxwell Smart,
18:34finds your hollowed-out carcasses
18:37on the front steps of control,
18:39he'll realize that he can't stop
18:42Project Robin Hood.
18:48I've always wondered,
18:49why do they call it Robin Hood?
18:53Because he stole from the rich
18:54and gave to the poor.
18:56But we steal from everyone
18:57and give to the rich.
18:58And you don't give, you sell.
19:00Exactly.
19:01It's very deceiving.
19:02Look, we steal, we give, sort of.
19:04It works for me.
19:05Well, I think we ought to change it.
19:07And call it what?
19:08Project Hay?
19:09Let's steal organs from innocent people
19:11and sell them to really rich people?
19:13Please!
19:14Let's get back to work.
19:16If you dig, we must.
19:18Hold his eyes open.
19:21I don't want him to miss a thing.
19:24Um, I-I really don't like that.
19:27Now, where shall I begin?
19:29Liver? Kidneys? Heart?
19:32No, let's be daring.
19:35The brain.
19:37Ah!
19:38Nurse!
19:39Zach! Do something!
19:41Turn on the gas!
19:43You can't do this for her!
19:49You're right.
19:51You'll do it.
19:53Your life for hers.
19:55Deal?
19:56Deal?
20:03Proceed, Dr. Smart.
20:11Sponge.
20:12I'm proud of you, son.
20:27The chaos hospitals have been shut down,
20:29and the illegal organ ring has been smashed.
20:31We have a visitor.
20:33Twenty-four!
20:34Good to see you back.
20:35How you feeling, Twenty-four?
20:36Come see, come, sir.
20:37We got something for you.
20:38My organs?
20:39Thanks, guys.
20:40You shouldn't have.
20:41Enjoy him, buddy.
20:42All right, Twenty-four.
20:43It's time to get you put back together again.
20:44What's this BLT?
20:45Oh.
20:46That's mine.
20:47It's my lunch.
20:48Sorry about that.
20:49Okay, Twenty-four.
20:50Unless I miss my job.
20:51I'll be back.
20:52I'll be back.
20:53I'll be back.
20:54How you feeling, Twenty-four?
20:55Come see, come, sir.
20:56We got something for you.
20:57My organs?
20:58Thanks, guys.
20:59You shouldn't have.
21:00Enjoy him, buddy.
21:01All right, Twenty-four.
21:02It's time to get you put back together again.
21:04What's this BLT?
21:05Oh.
21:06That's mine.
21:07It's my lunch.
21:08Sorry about that.
21:09Okay, Twenty-four.
21:11Unless I miss my guess, you'll be out of the hospital in a couple of days.
21:17Would you believe a week?
21:20Zack, when you told Mendelsohn you would take my place on the operating table, did you mean it?
21:25Oh, of course I meant it.
21:26You'd do the same for me, right?
21:28Right?
21:29If I answer that, it'll get personal, and you'll get all squishy.
21:33Well, then forget personal.
21:34How about just professional?
21:36Professionally, Zack, I would give up all my organs to save your life.
21:40Good.
21:41And personally?
21:42Zack.
21:43Come on.
21:44Personally.
21:45Small intestine.
21:48Maybe a lung.
21:50That's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me.
21:53high!
21:54I love the
21:58Dr.
21:59Scared.
22:00I love y'all.
22:02But you'll be on your own.
22:03I love it.
22:04Hey, praisms!
22:05You say?
22:06I love it.
22:07We'll be on your own.
22:08We'll be on my own.
22:10Yep.
22:11We'll be on my own.
22:12We'll be on your own.
22:13We'll be on the Great Joe.
22:14We'll be on your own.
22:15Thanks.
22:16That's it.
22:17So, I love you.
22:18A lasting.
22:19I'll see you next time.
Comentarios