- 13 hours ago
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00:02The most powerful woman in New York is not Tina Brown, or Diane Sawyer, or even Rosie O'Donnell.
00:09It's the hostess at Balzac, which had overnight become the only restaurant that mattered.
00:14And we were there to celebrate the moment.
00:16This is humiliating. We've been waiting for 45 minutes.
00:19I think I'm going to faint.
00:21Doesn't she know who we are?
00:22Who are we?
00:23I own my own PR firm. You write a newspaper column. This should not be happening.
00:28I'm going back up there.
00:30Excuse me?
00:31Hello? Excuse me?
00:32Hello?
00:33We've been waiting 45 minutes.
00:37Look, I'm not sure you understand, but I'm kind of somebody.
00:42And she's definitely kind of somebody. And we really need to eat now.
00:47I'm sorry.
00:53Excuse me?
00:57Give me a 20.
00:58You must be joking.
01:00You think I should make it a 50?
01:01If I had $50 with me, do you think I'd give it to that girl?
01:04She cannot do this to us. We're leaving.
01:10Let me tell you something. I was that woman 10 years ago, but I wielded my power in a benevolent
01:15manner.
01:15Can we please talk about this over lunch somewhere else?
01:18Or a Jersey where we might actually get seated?
01:21Do you realize? If she were a man, not only would we be eating right now, but they'd be sending
01:26over free drinks.
01:27Well, listen, I know a great Thai place around the corner where the owner's son practically always sends over a
01:31complimentary order of meat crop.
01:32How sad.
01:34Think we can get it to go?
01:35A short time later, Samantha headed back to her office while I decided to investigate this theory I had about
01:41shopping as a way to unleash the creative subconscious.
01:45All right. I'm going to take them.
01:47I was already planning on returning them when...
01:50Miss...
01:53They told me to do that. And now they want to talk to you.
01:57Scusa!
01:58That won't be necessary.
01:59Oh my God! I don't believe it!
02:03When did you get to town?
02:04Just yesterday!
02:07Darling, you look fantastic.
02:09Oh, I can't let you do this.
02:11Of course you can. You can pay me back never.
02:13Besides, it's on Carlo.
02:14Oh, wow. When did you do that?
02:18About two months.
02:19His family has this gigantic ranch in Argentina. Very, very wealthy.
02:23He has a tiny little penis, but he knows exactly how to use it.
02:27Oh.
02:27Wave, darling. Wave!
02:29Ciao! Ciao! Ciao!
02:32Wow, that's very nice of you, but I just... I can't accept this.
02:34But of course you can.
02:35When have I ever given you a birthday present or a Christmas present?
02:39I mean, you are like a sister to me.
02:41Yet? I never see you! Oh!
02:45The truth was we'd only met a few times.
02:47Most people would classify Amelita as Eurotrash.
02:50I thought she was fun.
02:51So call me. I'm staying at the Four Seasons with Carlo.
02:54Don't you live in the city?
02:55I'm a citizen of the world.
02:57A citizen of the world, darling.
02:59Now take the shoes and we'll talk soon, eh?
03:01I can't... I can't do this.
03:02Of course you can!
03:03Take the shoes, go! Go! Go!
03:07Amore!
03:08It was so nice to see you.
03:09Ciao!
03:10We'll call you.
03:10I couldn't understand a word she was saying, but I felt I had in my possession all the Italian
03:15I'd ever need to know.
03:16Dulce, dulce, dulce.
03:18While at home, all the English I seemed to encounter was bills, bills, bills.
03:23I envied Amelita.
03:24Her life was a blur of rich...
03:32...power that she exploited to her full advantage, which presented a certain conundrum.
03:37Where's the line between professional girlfriend and just plain professional?
03:42Women have the right to use every means at their disposal to achieve power.
03:45Short of sleeping their way to the top.
03:47Not if that's what it takes to compete.
03:49But that's exploitation!
03:51Of men, which is perfectly legal.
03:53Saturday night, in an effort to save money and maybe even pick up a few extra bucks,
03:58I invited the girls over for poker.
04:00I'll buy two.
04:01I'm in for three.
04:02So, you advocate a double standard.
04:05Women can use their sexuality to get ahead whenever possible, but men should not be allowed to take advantage of
04:10it?
04:10No, I'm just saying that men and women are equal opportunity exploiters.
04:14What if you sense that someone is giving you a professional advantage because they find you charming?
04:20Charming?
04:22I guess I gotta hear.
04:23Well, a few days ago, Neville Morgan, the notoriously reclusive painter, paid a visit to the gallery.
04:31Neville was making his yearly pilgrimage to Manhattan to check out what was new and hot on the art scene.
04:36And he found it.
04:38Charlotte.
04:38It was only a matter of moments before he invited her to his farm upstate to view his latest work.
04:43So, if I could get him to show at the gallery, it would be an incredible coup, but what if
04:48he wants me to, you know, hold his brush?
04:52If he so much as suggests what she's suggesting, you give me a call and we'll sue the hell out
04:56of him.
04:57That's the only proper way to trade sex for power.
04:59I can't believe what I'm hearing. You're like the Harvard Law of Lorena Baba.
05:04It's Skipper. I told him I was here. He insisted on picking me up, but he's not supposed to be
05:09here till 11.
05:10Aw, he's like a sweet little seal pup.
05:13Because you sometimes want a club.
05:18You're an hour early.
05:20Oh, uh, I can wait in the hall.
05:22No, Skipper, come in.
05:24It's alright. I'm leaving anyway. You guys will clean me out.
05:30Goodnight, ladies. Charlotte, keep me posted.
05:39A couple of hours later, I was looking forward to calling it an early night when...
05:47Hello?
05:48Carrie, you bitch! What are you doing?
05:51Actually, I'm getting ready to go to sleep.
05:53Why don't you come and join us? We are at Balzac.
05:55And there is someone here. I'm dying for you to meet.
05:59Oh, I'd love to, but I'm really trying to cut back.
06:01You know, pinch a few pennies.
06:03You are crazy, you know that?
06:05Why don't you just come down here and be your fabulous dad?
06:08The truth was, I could barely afford that either.
06:11But I rationalized that my new shoes shouldn't be punished just because I can't budget.
06:16Hi.
06:17Sorry, uh, you're not on the list.
06:19Oh, no, no, I don't need a list. My friends are already in.
06:22Darling, what took you so long?
06:27You won't believe what Carlo bought me this afternoon at Van Cleefen, our best.
06:32Oh, what?
06:33Oh, my goodness. That's gorgeous.
06:36$12,000.
06:37Oh, oh, wow.
06:40Listen, I want you to come and meet the world's most fabulous man.
06:43Sounds like a trendy sideshow act.
06:46You're crazy!
06:49Ah, Karen, I'd like you to meet my boyfriend Carlo.
06:53Hi.
06:54And his friend Gilles.
06:56Hello.
06:56Hello.
06:57Nice to meet you.
07:00Gilles is an architect from Paris.
07:02Oh.
07:03How long are you here for?
07:04Just a couple of days on business.
07:07I've told Gilles all about you.
07:10I told him you are the most beautiful, talented, and fascinating woman in New York.
07:15I am single.
07:17How is this possible?
07:18Oh, I get it.
07:19You're an architect and a comedian.
07:22I don't understand.
07:24Oh, nothing, nothing.
07:26I'm just, uh, I'm just being a puss-stupid.
07:29You?
07:30Never.
07:31I suddenly recalled my terrible weakness for gorgeous French architects.
07:35Can I, uh, get anyone something else?
07:38You know, to put it, uh, you'd like another bottle of wine.
07:43Wonderful.
07:44And what will the rest of you be having?
07:49During the next couple of hours, I put my journalistic skills to good use.
07:53I discovered that Gilles was recently divorced with a five-year-old daughter, Beatrice,
07:57who lived with her mother in Paris.
07:59Yes.
07:59He was passing through New York on his way to Brazil to supervise construction of a new hotel.
08:03I think you are too beautiful, dear writer.
08:06I think you are too charming to be an architect.
08:09I think you should give up your life here and move with me to Paris immediately.
08:12I thought you were spending the next six months in Brazil.
08:15You can join me there first.
08:17Oh, don't tempt me.
08:18I'm so broke these days, I might take you up on that offer just to save in rent.
08:23Writing does not pay well.
08:24No, no, it does.
08:25It does.
08:26It's just, um, I have this little substance abuse problem.
08:32Expensive footwear.
08:38I see.
08:39I'm only here for the weekend, but I would love to see you tomorrow.
08:44Maybe you could, uh, show me the town.
08:48Oh, you've never been to New York?
08:49About twelve times, but I've never seen it with someone like you.
08:55You really have that certain je ne sais quoi, don't you?
09:00Yes.
09:03And so do you.
09:08So, um, I'll see you tomorrow.
09:12Good night.
09:13Bonsoir.
09:19Sure, I saw some red flags.
09:22Divorced, French, and almost uncomfortably handsome.
09:26But I felt like I was floating on air.
09:35The next morning, I was brought back down to earth as I confronted that eternal puzzle.
09:40A closet full of clothes, nothing to wear.
09:45Just a minute!
09:47Who is it?
09:48Skipper.
09:52Hey!
09:53I'm sorry, I should go.
09:55No, no, no, no. Skipper, Skipper, come on in.
09:57What is it?
09:59It's Miranda. She's got me totally whacked.
10:02It's like I'm obsessed.
10:04And I know that I shouldn't be, because I can sense that it's totally turning her off.
10:08But I can't control it. I can't.
10:11It's like she's got this power over me, and I'm helpless.
10:16Keep going. I just, I have to get dressed, right?
10:18Is it possible to be addicted to a person?
10:21I mean, the sex is so awesome that it's like, it's all I can think about.
10:26You know, I've never considered myself a, you know, a horndog before, but I'm worried I might be starting to
10:32scare her off.
10:33Well, is that what she said?
10:34No, but mostly we just have sex in the afternoon. She never lets me spend the night.
10:41Well, I have an idea. Why don't the two of you just spend a night together, you know, and not
10:48have sex?
10:49That would be hard. That would be really hard.
10:53Well, I think it's really important that you try.
10:56I don't even shower afterwards. I like to spend the whole day smelling like Miranda.
11:11I began to fear that Miranda's sexuality was overpowering poor Skipper.
11:22Later, I spent the most incredibly romantic afternoon with Gilles.
11:35I felt like I had landed in a Claude Malouche film. A man and a slightly neurotic woman.
11:51Wait, wait. I kind of have this rule. I don't sit with men. I've only not a day.
11:59I see.
12:04I gave in. After all, it was already tomorrow in Paris.
12:20You look so beautiful when you sleep. I didn't want to disturb you.
12:25Are you leaving so early?
12:27I've got a plane.
12:28Look at us.
12:29No, no. Stay in bed. Order room service. And show yourself.
12:39Look, I can just get dressed.
12:42Relax. I'll call you.
12:46Okay.
12:48Bon voyage.
12:53As he walked out the door, it suddenly dawned on me that he didn't have my phone number. And I
12:58didn't have his phone number.
13:03But he had left me a note.
13:09With a thousand dollars in cash.
13:13Thanks for the beautiful day.
13:15Must have been a hell of a beautiful day.
13:17Well, it was.
13:18We had such a fantastic connection.
13:20And he leaves me money.
13:22I don't understand. What exactly about me screams whore?
13:25Besides the thousand dollars on the end table?
13:27I just can't believe that you had dinner at Balzac.
13:30Wait a minute. I thought I ordered two Eggs Benedict and one spinach omelet.
13:33It's alright. I'll take the omelet.
13:35You know what, you guys? This isn't right. We're gonna pay for all this ourselves, alright?
13:37He said order anything.
13:39The room service is one thing, but the money? Uh-uh.
13:41What are you getting so uptight about?
13:43I mean, money is power. Sex is power.
13:46Therefore, getting money for sex is simply an exchange of power.
13:49Don't listen to the dime store Camille Taglia.
13:52I don't know whether to take it as an incredible compliment or as an incredible insult.
13:55Just take it, period.
13:56Well, I wouldn't know how to return it anyway because the one thing he didn't leave me was his phone
14:00number.
14:00He paid in full. What more is there to talk about?
14:02Who is this Amelita Amalfi character anyway?
14:05I'm concerned that you've been drafted into a ring of high-class hookers.
14:08She isn't a hooker. She's... she's like an international party girl.
14:13She's a hooker with a passport.
14:14Did you ever have any conversations about money?
14:16No. I mean, I did allude to the fact that I was a bit cash poor these days.
14:21So maybe it's supposed to be a loan?
14:22I don't remember filling out an application.
14:25Sweetheart, men give, women receive. It's biological destiny.
14:29Hello! Do you really want to be saying that?
14:30I mean, that's exactly the kind of argument men have been using since the dawn of time to explain it.
14:34Wait! I don't...
14:35You guys, you guys, you guys, I'm just gonna...
14:36You know what? I'm gonna write the whole thing off as a bad date with a cash bonus.
14:39You know, that salmon is really good. I think we should order another one.
14:43As I struggled with the dilemma of how to manage my newfound money,
14:48Charlotte arrived at the secluded Connecticut home of the painter Neville Morgan
14:52in an attempt to secure his latest work.
14:56Welcome.
14:59Hi. I feel so privileged. Meeting you is, without a doubt, the high point of my career.
15:04Thank you. I'm frankly surprised that someone as young as you is even familiar with my work.
15:09Are you serious? I studied you in college.
15:11Oh, my God. I apologize. I really do.
15:15Oh, you're much too modest.
15:16Well, here we are. Excuse me.
15:24The canvases you're about to see are what I consider to be the apotheosis of every great idea I've ever
15:31had.
15:32It's the closest I've ever come to pure universal God force.
15:39The cunt.
15:43Oh, my. They're very powerful.
15:48Exactly. The most powerful force in the universe.
15:55The source of all life and pleasure and beauty.
16:01That's true.
16:02I used to paint full nudes.
16:05But as I got older, I realized that the truth was to be found only in the cunt.
16:12Charlotte hated the C word.
16:14But Neville Morgan was not a man to be corrected.
16:18Hi.
16:19I thought you might like something to drink.
16:21Charlotte, this is my wife, Gertrude.
16:24It's a pleasure.
16:26Lemonade and cookies?
16:28Each of these portraits is of a woman who has touched my life.
16:34Incredible.
16:36I wonder.
16:37Would you consider posing for me sometime?
16:40Me?
16:44Well, I'm very flattered.
16:49Excellent.
16:50So long as you're here, I could sketch you this afternoon.
16:53I bet you have a beautiful cunt, dear.
16:57As Charlotte pondered how far she would go for her love of art and the gallery.
17:04Another Saturday night.
17:06With my hooker money still burning a hole in my pocket,
17:09Samantha and I showed up at Balzac.
17:11She reasoned that since I was there once, I was as good as in.
17:15I don't understand.
17:16I made these reservations weeks ago.
17:18And she's already been here.
17:20I'm sorry.
17:22Is there a host that I might talk to?
17:27I will snap her.
17:29I will put her over my knee and I will snap her like a twig.
17:32I'm sorry.
17:34I'm hungry.
17:35I'm going to go to the bathroom and then I'll leave it right.
17:43Ah!
17:44Katie!
17:44Katie!
17:45Joe!
17:46Joe!
17:47Come here!
17:49They all looked so chic and glamorous.
17:52Part of me wanted to grab Samantha and make a run for it.
17:55While another part...
17:56Hi!
17:57How are you?
17:59Katie, I want you to meet Mario, Alan, Justine and Peter.
18:05Hi.
18:06Mario's family has one of those gorgeous palazzos on the Grand Canal in Venezia.
18:10And we are all going there next week for the Film Festival.
18:14You should join us.
18:15Absolutely!
18:16Yes!
18:17You must bring your little laptop and write all about it.
18:19You'd be mad not to go.
18:22Marlo, Katie is one of the most fascinating, talented and beautiful women in New York.
18:27I have no doubt.
18:29I've never been to Venice.
18:30No.
18:31No.
18:33Venice is the most beautiful, the most romantic city in the world.
18:37Really?
18:37I, uh...
18:39I heard it was sinking.
18:42That's why you must come immediately.
18:45Before you tell Don.
18:48I couldn't say I wasn't tempted.
18:50I realized that I could leverage myself like the human equivalent of a sexy junk bond.
18:55I'd parlay that thousand dollars into a trip to Venice.
18:58Into a nice piece of jewelry.
19:00A rich husband followed by a richer divorce.
19:06I'm sorry.
19:07I'm gonna have to say goodbye.
19:08I'm here with a friend.
19:09She's waiting for me at the bar.
19:10What a pity.
19:13Call me.
19:13I'm staying at the car live with Peter.
19:16Okay.
19:16Ciao.
19:17Ciao.
19:20Just because Venice was sinking didn't mean my morals had to go down with it.
19:26And as for Gilles and the thousand dollars, I figured there was nothing to be done.
19:30For better or worse, I had just established my rate for a one night stand.
19:36Excuse me.
19:38Yes?
19:38And then, the most powerful woman in Manhattan asked me for a favor.
19:43Do you have a tampon?
19:44Oh!
19:45Sure.
19:47Of course.
19:50Thanks a lot.
19:57I never told Samantha the source of my newfound power.
20:00But from that moment on, we never had a problem getting a table at Balzac again.
20:10A couple of weeks later, we were all there to celebrate Charlotte's coup.
20:14Hi.
20:15Excuse me.
20:16Just a second.
20:19Are you number nine?
20:21Oh my god.
20:22I am so not number nine.
20:25Sigh.
20:27Yeah, right.
20:34Is this right?
20:36No?
20:36What?
20:41Hi.
20:42Hi.
20:43Hi.
20:46Hi.
20:47Hi.
20:55Hi, everyone.
20:59Hi.
21:01Hi.
21:02About my next dream
21:05And it's you and me
21:07And finally makes three tonight