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01:30Hey, you chewing the gum.
01:32I hope you brought enough for everybody.
01:42I'm bored.
01:44I'm really bored.
01:46I'm so bored.
01:48Bored am I.
01:50I am so bored.
01:51I would do absolutely anything to get my mind off how totally, utterly bored I am.
02:01I'm not that bored.
02:05Well, what have we here?
02:15Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
02:18I take back one-third of all the rotten things I ever said about you.
02:22Carfield, enough already.
02:23I didn't expect you to be so excited about our new satellite dish.
02:28Satellite dish?
02:30Crumb.
02:31I thought it was my new supper bowl.
02:38There, all hooked up.
02:40But what's that little sign?
02:43Caution.
02:43Avoid getting tomato sauce and or mozzarella cheese on satellite dish.
02:47Manufacturer will not be responsible for side effects.
02:50Odd.
02:51I wonder why that warning is there.
02:54Now we can get 100 channels, but I don't want you watching all night.
02:59But there are movies on, and sports, and game shows where people dress like large chickens.
03:06I'm going to bed, Garfield.
03:08Try it out.
03:09Oh, and whatever you do, don't get any tomato sauce or mozzarella on the satellite dish, okay?
03:15Why would I do that?
03:17Here's the satellite TV listings.
03:20And I'm serious, Garfield.
03:22If you watch too much TV, you're going to turn into one.
03:27The All-Yo-Yo Channel.
03:29The News in Pig Latin.
03:31Here's a documentary on clipboards through the ages.
03:35Hey, who says TV can't be educational?
03:40Microwave lasagna and a TV set.
03:43What more could one want out of life?
03:46Do the honors, Odie.
03:47What?
03:49Uh-oh.
03:52Bad picture.
03:53John must have hooked it up wrong.
03:55I'll go move the satellite dish.
03:58Huh?
03:59I want to watch a western.
04:01I'll point it toward Texas.
04:06Consider, if you will, the case of one Garfield the cat.
04:10Life with this feline consists of sleeping, eating, annoying small puppies and postal employees, eating some more, and watching anything
04:19and everything on television.
04:27A chance meeting of marinara and mozzarella, a manufacturer's warning unheeded.
04:33Now, Garfield the cat finds himself in the wrong end of that cathode ray tube.
04:38Don't touch that dial.
04:40Don't touch that dial.
04:41For your end, for your end, the lasagna is on.
04:50Lightning gives him power, Igor.
04:53Observe as my creation comes to life.
04:56Oh, look onto the face of the monster.
05:00The face that will terrorize all of mankind.
05:06Have you seen where my lasagna went?
05:09Hey, where am I?
05:10And how come I'm in black and white?
05:14I'm in the movie.
05:16Odie, I'm a TV show.
05:18And I think I may be a rerun.
05:20Get me out of here.
05:27Now I'm on another channel.
05:29And I've been colorized.
05:31Well, at least this is better than the monster movie.
05:36And the pack is racing down the field.
05:382,000 pounds of linebackers with a collective IQ of 80.
05:4550, 60.
05:46This is one of the longest touchdowns in history.
05:50Odie, change the channel quick.
05:54Uh-oh.
05:55Looks like a Western.
05:57I'll bet $20.
06:00I'll see your $20 and I'll raise you $30 and a gold watch.
06:05Well, I'll save your gold watch and raise you.
06:08A million dollars.
06:10I'll see your million dollars and raise you a million dollars and the Klopman diamond.
06:15And raise you my horse.
06:23I'll see your horse and raise you a grand cow and the mayor of Devon, Fort, Iowa.
06:31All right, I'll come.
06:33Show me your card.
06:34You got the old maid.
06:36I win.
06:36Why, you lily-livered side-winding lowdown.
06:41Quick, Odie.
06:43Channel change.
06:47This is not much better.
06:49Try again.
06:54Odie, this is the worst place I could possibly be.
07:02Correction, this is the worst place I could possibly be.
07:06Hi, friends.
07:07Chip Tooth here for Chip Tooth's used pet emporium, the city's largest dealer in new and used household animals.
07:12Folks, we're swamped with pets and we've got to clear them out and make room for next year's models.
07:16Here's a 1978 wide-body pussycat with all the standard equipment.
07:20Whiskers, claws, fleas, the works.
07:22Oh, no.
07:23I'm being sold like a used car.
07:26Hope he doesn't try to check under the hood.
07:28Folks, take it home for a free 10-day test drive.
07:30Have your mechanic put it up on the rack and check it out.
07:33And if you order before midnight tomorrow, we'll throw in a free muffler.
07:38A pun.
07:40Oh, no.
07:42I'd better get out of here before someone gives me a smog check.
07:45Odie, help.
08:13Odie, help.
08:14My vertical hold is slipping.
08:17Odie!
08:20Parker?
08:21Garfield?
08:22I knew it.
08:23I knew you'd watch TV all night.
08:26What?
08:26Huh?
08:27Like I told you, one of these days, you're going to turn into a TV.
08:33It was just a dream.
08:35That's all.
08:36A dream.
08:37I didn't wind up in the TV, and Odie didn't break the remote control.
08:47Submitted for your approval, Garfield the cat, lover of fine food, who learned the hard way that there's some TV
08:55dinners even he can't digest, here in the Lasagna Zone.
09:08Imagination is a wonderful thing, guys.
09:10Just concentrate and you can turn a silo into anything.
09:14Anything?
09:14Anything, like Rapunzel's tower, or a giant ice cream cone, or a rocket ship, or even a...
09:30No, the farmer's going to be really angry about this.
09:35That's some imagination.
09:37I'll say.
10:08You've got to do something about Roy.
10:11Gee, Orson, you look terrible.
10:14Yeah, I didn't sleep a wink all night.
10:16I guess our local Sandman made a mistake.
10:19Don't worry, Orson.
10:20We'll find a way to put you to sleep.
10:22I sure hope so.
10:28Oh, wise tales, unlimited.
10:30May I help you?
10:31Nope.
10:32The fairy godmother's booked solid till the end of the year.
10:34Bye.
10:36Oh, wise tales, unlimited.
10:40What?
10:41The Sandman didn't get there to put you to sleep?
10:43Oh, I'm sorry.
10:45A regular Sandman is out sick, so we hired a temporary, and he's new in the business.
10:49A lot of people got skipped last night.
10:52I have a very boring leprechaun I could send over.
10:55Try to give your boyfriend a break, and look what happens.
11:00Okay, that takes care of the president of Brazil.
11:04Orson Pig is next.
11:05Oh, boy, I'm in trouble.
11:07The sun's up already, and I'm way behind.
11:10Orson, there has got to be a way to put you to sleep.
11:14Hey, how about exercise?
11:17That makes people tired.
11:18Yeah, all we have to do is weary out.
11:20Okay, I'll try anything.
11:24Lift up your leg, put it over your head.
11:27What a bizarre exercise.
11:31Now dance on your hands till your face turns red.
11:34Are you sure this is going to get me to sleep?
11:38Lie down on the ground and bounce up with a leap.
11:41Do it over and over till you fall asleep.
12:10One, two, three, snore.
12:11One, two, three, snore.
12:14Lay it down, stretch it out.
12:17Now turn around, run and slay.
12:21Don't you stop.
12:23I'll make you exercise until you drop.
12:26One, two, three, snore.
12:29One, two, three, snore.
12:33Well, feel sleepy?
12:35Not at all.
12:37I...
12:41Okay, so my aim was a little off.
12:46A glass of warm milk always puts me to sleep.
12:49The cows in the dairy barn donated a whole pailful to you.
12:53Just drink this milk and you'll go right to dreamland.
13:03Well, how do you feel?
13:09Okay, I can see this situation calls for drastic measures.
13:15Counting sheep is guaranteed to make you fall asleep, you know.
13:19That's my niece, Shirley.
13:20That's my Uncle Bill.
13:22That's my half-cousin, Ralph.
13:24Okay, everybody out of the barn.
13:26I think I'll do better on my own.
13:30What a mess.
13:32I can't go to sleep until I clean this place up.
13:35Where's the broom?
13:41Nighty-night, Orson Pig.
13:44Oh, no.
13:46Oh, I'm, uh...
13:50Allergic to wool.
13:57Nothing is going to put me to sleep.
13:59I might as well do my chores.
14:05Murray, that pig is still awake.
14:08You're not doing your job.
14:10Oh, you're right.
14:11I'll have him in dreamland in no time.
14:26Mr. Parker is snoozing on the job.
14:29He needs a personal wake-up call.
14:33Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop.
14:59Turn in your sad.
15:00You're history.
15:04Oh, well.
15:05There are other ways to put people to sleep.
15:07I could be an anesthesiologist or a hypnotist or...
15:12I could run a TV network.
15:24I wonder what it would be like to be a wild animal here in the zoo.
15:32If I'd change this stupid sign, I'd look real fierce.
15:39Then I'd scare all the spectators.
15:46It's a pretty convincing performance, if I do say so myself.
16:12The sushi looks, uh, great, Liz.
16:17Raw fish on cold rice, huh?
16:25Huh?
16:27Garfield, what are you doing here?
16:29It's okay, John.
16:30I was getting kind of tired of waiting for him to show up.
16:33That's the armor of a Yojimbo.
16:35Yojimbo?
16:36Mm-hmm, that's a samurai warrior.
16:37He works as someone's bodyguard.
16:39Hmm.
16:39You can eat as much sushi as you like.
16:41Don't mind if I do.
16:44Garfield!
16:47Believe me, you didn't miss a thing.
16:49The rice was okay, but they forgot to cook the fish.
16:58I always felt that samurai warriors were so heroic.
17:02Say, good-looking, can I be your urban samurai?
17:06Samurais are ancient history, which is what you'll be if you don't knock off those corny lines.
17:11Uh, okay, fine.
17:14There ain't room enough in this town for the both of us, Toshiro.
17:19What does this Yojimbo guy got I haven't got anyway?
17:24Okay, so he can see his feet.
17:26Big deal.
17:27I am Yojimbo, protector to all.
17:32Hurry up, Garfield.
17:42Hey!
17:43I can't stand seeing someone so beautiful with someone so ugly.
17:49Gee, I didn't think they're that bad-looking.
17:52Hey, cutie, I was about done with this chicken and taken up with a real man.
17:57Who's a chicken?
17:59John's about to get his drumsticks broken.
18:01You take that back or I...
18:03Shut up!
18:04Why don't you and the fur basketball split and leave me with Chickie-Poo here?
18:10Let's get out of here.
18:11Good idea.
18:14Hey, are you going to let him get away with that remark?
18:18What a wimp!
18:19What a shrimp!
18:20What a wimp shrimp!
18:21What a shrimp!
18:26Boy, if I weren't wearing my good suit, that guy would have been sorry.
18:30It's okay, John.
18:31There was nothing you could do.
18:33I guess the day of the Yojimbo really is gone.
18:37Look at it this way.
18:38Chicken's two bucks a pound.
18:40That means you're worth about $310.
18:45I'd let that guy push me around.
18:48Liz must think I'm a real wimp.
18:52And I'm going to do something about it.
18:56The samurai Yojumbo is reporting for bodyguard duty.
19:00Hey, a wimp like John needs protection.
19:02I'm here to protect John from evil.
19:06And also tooth decay.
19:08Huh?
19:09Garfield, I'm going to take some lessons in the martial arts.
19:12Wait.
19:13Yojumbo will see if it's safe.
19:20Seems to be no danger here.
19:33Welcome to the Sakamoto School of the Martial Arts.
19:36I am Sakamoto-san.
19:38I want to learn to defend myself.
19:40I want to tap my inner strength.
19:43I want to feel the power of the universe within me.
19:46I want to...
19:47Oh, you want to impress pretty lady who thinks you are a wimp.
19:51Very well.
19:52Come.
19:52I shall show you some basic techniques.
20:08Notice the pattern emerging.
20:11To channel your inner strength,
20:14it's necessary that you assume the stuffed vulture position.
20:17Stuffed vulture.
20:19Okay, tell me how.
20:21Okay.
20:22You crouch and put your left arm behind your back,
20:25then shift your weight to the right and see what's left.
20:28I wonder how John's making out.
20:32Gee, I don't know why,
20:34but somehow John reminds me of a stuffed vulture.
20:40You have done well, my son.
20:43How can you say that?
20:44You're still alive.
20:48Thanks for going out with me again, Liz.
20:50You know, if we run into that bully,
20:52you know what I'm going to do?
20:54A four-minute mile?
20:55I'm going to stand up to him.
20:57I'm going to show that baboon what I'm made of.
21:01I have a feeling we're all going to see what John's made of.
21:04Okay, clown.
21:06What are you going to do?
21:07Just one second.
21:11I'm going to call the police.
21:13All right.
21:14Now, are you properly terrified?
21:19Okay, I'm through being Mr. Nice Guy.
21:22Your history, pal.
21:24This looks like a job for Yo-Jumbo.
21:29Hi.
21:34Question.
21:35What am I doing?
21:37Do the words run for your life mean anything to you?
21:41Yo-Yo.
22:02Hey, look out!
22:02Hey, look out!
22:15John!
22:18John, are you all right?
22:20You defeated that tough guy.
22:23Actually...
22:24You are, my urban samurai.
22:28Yo-Jumbo say,
22:29he who do all the work seldom get the credit.
22:32But had better get a big dinner.
22:34Ya-I-I-I-I-I-I-I...
23:07¡Gracias por ver!
23:09¡Gracias por ver!
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