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مسلسل Bob's Burgers مترجم - Episode 8
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00:22Wow. I thought last year's art crawl was terrible, but they really outdid themselves this year, huh?
00:27Yeah. Oh, bad. Very bad. Oh, look at that. Really bad. Really, really bad.
00:35Dad, why does art crawl suck so much? Well, it's just a very loose definition of art, Louise, and don't
00:42say suck.
00:43Don't say suck, please. You're right, though. It does suck. I don't want you kids to think this is what
00:48art is.
00:49We should go to a museum. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah, maybe not. Let's not overdo it. Let's just walk around
00:55and make fun of this stuff.
00:56Yeah. Why don't we just go back to the restaurant?
01:00Because your Aunt Gail is there hanging up her art, which we're not allowed to make fun of at all.
01:04Why can't we make fun of Aunt Gail's paintings? She's family.
01:08Yeah, that means never holding back anything, right, Pitstings?
01:12Am I showing? Let's just say your shirt looks like my underwear right now.
01:16Yeah. Well, look, no one tells Gail anything she can't handle. That's your mom's rule, all right? You treat her
01:21like a mental patient.
01:22Well, I mean, she probably should be one, right?
01:25Yeah. I heard she ate her lipstick once because she wanted to feel red inside.
01:29And she made a dress out of live shrimp and wore it to mass!
01:33Oh, and she shaved her cat.
01:34Come on, Louise. You know none of that is true, except for the cat shaving.
01:38Maybe the shrimp and the lipstick.
01:40Are you kidding me? My kid could paint that.
01:42Wow. It cost $200.
01:44Someone bought that mess?
01:46How rude. Harold. Harold!
01:49What?
01:50There are some poorly supervised children amongst the earth. Get rid of them.
01:54All right. Let's go. Keep moving.
01:56Excuse me. Are you a bouncer? Are you going to bounce my kids?
01:59No, no. Just keep it moving, Chubbs.
02:02Chubbs?
02:02You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here.
02:05Hey, easy, pal, all right? Don't touch.
02:07Come on, Dad. This guy's not worth it.
02:09Listen to your kids, Fatsy.
02:11Fatsy?
02:12Come on. Come on, Dad. Dad, look at me. Give me your eyes, Dad. Give me your eyes.
02:15Take a deep breath. You're a lucky pal.
02:18It's not worth it, Dad. If you hit him, your hand would smell like ointment and pee.
02:23You smell like ointment and pee.
02:25You smell like ointment and pee.
02:27You smell like ointment and pee.
02:29You smell like ointment and pee.
02:30You smell like ointment and pee.
02:33Well, that was awkward. What is that place?
02:36You don't know Reflections? They sell art, not just during art crawl, but year-round.
02:41Reflections.
02:42Sounds like a strip club, the way you say it.
02:44Reflections.
02:45Hmm. So, brace yourself for Aunt Gail's art show.
02:49Mom said Aunt Gail told her they're just adorable animals.
02:52Oh, yeah? That doesn't sound so bad.
02:54Hi, hon. How is our girl?
02:56Hi. Everything's going great here. We're having fun.
02:59Oh, wow.
03:00Lynn.
03:00Gail's here. We hung our paintings.
03:02Look at this one. Look at that one.
03:05Linda, can you just let me see...
03:06Oh, my God!
03:09Yeah! Anuses!
03:14Oh, God. Oh, my God, Lynn.
03:16It's a few days, Bobby.
03:18Linda, there are animal anuses all over our walls.
03:20Just think of them as cute little rumps.
03:22Lynn, they're anuses.
03:23I'm trying to think of worse paintings to hang in a restaurant.
03:26Um, nope. I can't think of any.
03:29Bad monkey!
03:30Kids, stop that.
03:31No! I'm specking the monkey!
03:33No way, Dad.
03:34This is the best thing that has ever happened to us.
03:37Horse butt.
03:38Oh, hello, sir.
03:39Don't look at the pictures of the anuses.
03:40Oh, he already did.
03:41Okay.
03:42You see that, Lynn?
03:42And no one wants to eat with one of those staring at them.
03:45Come on.
03:45You can't seriously think that this is a good idea.
03:47Well, they're not for me.
03:49But we promised Gail she could display her art for the art crawl.
03:52We can't take it back now.
03:53She's fragile.
03:54We have to support her.
03:55She's not that fragile, Lynn.
03:58Oh!
03:59What happened?
04:00What happened?
04:01Gail!
04:01Gail, honey, look.
04:02Look, it's a fork.
04:03Look, it's a fork.
04:05Oh, it's a fork.
04:07Oh, you're killing me.
04:09She's killing me.
04:10Okay, so she's fragile.
04:11And that means we have to be the anus restaurant?
04:13Yes, it means that.
04:15Oh, we can make t-shirts.
04:16It'll say,
04:17Milk, milk, lemonade.
04:19Around the corner, art is made.
04:21Bob, do you love them or do you just love them?
04:25What?
04:26Um, how did you...
04:27Why would you paint this?
04:30The inspiration came to me on a mountaintop.
04:34What should I paint?
04:40Hello?
04:41I'm looking at you.
04:42I see in you.
04:45I see what's inside you.
04:50Huh.
04:51He loves them!
04:56All right, listen up.
04:58All the suckers come out for art crawl.
05:00And they all want to pay money for crap.
05:02So paint some crap and we can sell it.
05:04Wait, you're not painting?
05:05No, I'm management.
05:07You two paint the stuff, I'll do the rest.
05:09I'll be wheeling a deal and I'll be getting my percent.
05:13Okay, let's see what you got so far.
05:15Time's up.
05:16Paintbrush is down.
05:17What the hell is this?
05:18I told you to paint commercial, touristy crap.
05:22I'm sorry I'm not a sellout.
05:24I can only paint what I feel.
05:25And I can only paint the truth!
05:27The robots are coming!
05:29Shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, hide!
05:32Oh, this is great.
05:33You guys want to be real artists, huh?
05:35Okay, that's an angle.
05:37I can sell that.
05:38But if you're going artsy, then you're going all the way.
05:42Someone's cutting off an ear.
05:44I need both of mine.
05:45I wear glasses.
05:46Well, what's your excuse?
05:47Don't got one.
05:48Have at it.
05:49Teddy, what's wrong?
05:50You haven't touched your food.
05:51I don't know, Bob.
05:51It's just the, uh...
05:53The anuses?
05:53Yeah, you know.
05:55Yeah, they're, uh...
05:56I know.
05:56No, they're like Mona Lisa's eyes.
05:58They follow you wherever you go.
06:00Oh, you're right.
06:01Well, I like them.
06:02You like them?
06:03Yeah, what's the problem?
06:05The anus is the window of the butt.
06:07It's true.
06:08I guess she's just painting what we're all thinking.
06:10Well, okay, but, Moyt, would you hang him up in your funeral home?
06:13Of course not.
06:13That would be terrible for business.
06:15I'm not an idiot.
06:16Count to three, but do it on two.
06:18I'll keep it on ice until our crawls over.
06:20Thanks, T.
06:21Here goes.
06:22Now, listen, Gene.
06:23I'm going to have trouble cutting through the cartilage at first.
06:25Mm-hmm.
06:26While I'm doing this,
06:27just think about your art.
06:29Okay.
06:30All right, ready?
06:31Ninja, robot, ninja, robot, ninja.
06:33One, two...
06:35Hey, kids.
06:36Oh, hey, Dad.
06:37I had to get away from those anuses for a while.
06:39You mean Mort and Teddy?
06:40No.
06:41No.
06:41You're Gail's paintings.
06:43What are you kids doing?
06:44What knife?
06:44What do you mean, what knife?
06:45Why are you holding a knife?
06:46Why am I holding a knife?
06:47She's turning me into a real artist.
06:49No, she's not.
06:50Put the knife down.
06:50I want to be an artist!
06:52Like Leonardo DiCaprio!
06:54That's right!
06:55That's Da Vinci, Gene.
06:56No!
06:57This is the only way I can sell this garbage is if I make them legit!
07:00Hey, wait a second.
07:02I have an idea.
07:03You know who loves the stuff you kids draw?
07:05You?
07:05No, your mother.
07:06This crap is like catnip to her.
07:08She can't resist it.
07:09Bring him inside.
07:10All right, we need to get these up before they get back.
07:12Your mom will be so excited to see this stuff,
07:15she won't even notice that I took Gail's paintings down.
07:18Pretty manipulative, Dad.
07:19I see where I get it.
07:21Did you see my taxes?
07:23Uh, what's this supposed to be?
07:24A ninja robot fighting a vampire tape recorder at Stonehenge.
07:27Who's that in the background?
07:28That's my friend Ken.
07:29Why is he like that?
07:30He's an albino.
07:31Oh.
07:32Yeah.
07:32I've never met Ken.
07:33Is he real or imaginary?
07:35He's real and he does improvised hip-hop.
07:37Okay, how old is he?
07:38He's 28.
07:39You can't have a 28-year-old albino friend.
07:41Yes, I can!
07:42All right, I can't deal with this right now.
07:44Tina, what do you got?
07:45It's our dentist.
07:46Dr. Yap?
07:47Why is he nude?
07:48Wait, has he been nude with you, Tina?
07:49I exercised some artistic license.
07:51Uh, I was switching dentists.
07:53No!
07:54I can't deal with that right now.
07:55Let's get him up.
07:58Linda, Gail, how was lunch?
08:00Very interesting.
08:02I think the waiter might have been hitting on me.
08:06Yes!
08:07He was very attentive.
08:09And he asked you a lot of questions about food.
08:11What was that all about?
08:12Uh, Bob?
08:13Where are my paintings?
08:15What?
08:16Uh, I had to take a few down to make room for the kids' stuff.
08:20Bobby, aw, the kids' stuff!
08:22Yeah.
08:22Looks like our wall is a giant refrigerator.
08:25I love it!
08:25Huh.
08:26See, Bob?
08:27If I didn't know any better, I'd think you wouldn't like my paintings.
08:31What?
08:31No!
08:32Aw!
08:32No, no, no!
08:33I know what I'm being lied to, Bob.
08:36It's like when I look at myself in the mirror and say, it's going to be okay.
08:40Fine.
08:41Look, Gail, I'm gonna level with you.
08:43No!
08:43No, Bob!
08:44No!
08:44No leveling!
08:45No!
08:45Here we go.
08:46Gail, the thing about your paintings...
08:48Bobby!
08:48Yes!
08:49Oh, look!
08:50Senior visitors!
08:51Yay!
08:52Oh, ho, ho!
08:53Well, look who it is.
08:55Great.
08:55The art store people.
08:56Oh, Reflections!
08:58I love that store!
09:00I love your yarn.
09:02What can we give for you?
09:03I'm not here as a patron.
09:05I'm here as Edith Crandrinkle, chairperson of the art crawl.
09:09I rush right over here because there are murmurs, whispers and murmurs around town,
09:13that you're displaying certain offensive orifices during the art crawl.
09:19Offices?
09:20Orifices!
09:21Ah!
09:22Not anymore.
09:22I took them all down.
09:24Oh, what a relief.
09:25I'm glad you agree with my decision.
09:27Your decision?
09:28What decision?
09:29That you can't display that type of art here.
09:32Wait, I can't?
09:33Absolutely not!
09:34It's obscene.
09:36Obscene.
09:36Oh, really?
09:37Yes!
09:37I won't allow it.
09:39Excuse me?
09:40You won't allow it?
09:41That's right, Tubbsy.
09:42You heard her.
09:43Who are you two to tell me what I can or can't hang on my wall?
09:46I am chairperson of the art crawl!
09:49Well, I'm the chairperson of this restaurant, and you know what?
09:52They're gonna go back up.
09:53How dare you!
09:54Aw, Bobby!
09:56Jean, Louise, go get the paintings.
09:58Here they are!
09:59Oh!
10:00Step into the butt closet!
10:02I will not!
10:03You should try it.
10:04I will not!
10:05What's it gonna take to get you into this rhino anus today?
10:08You are in direct violation of my wife, Bob.
10:12Oh, I am, am I?
10:13Well, how about this?
10:14Horse anus.
10:16Look at it.
10:17Oh!
10:18Chicken anus.
10:19Oh!
10:20Take a closer look.
10:21Box anus!
10:22Carrot!
10:23Gale, I'm commissioning a new series of anus paintings.
10:26Two words.
10:26Bigger.
10:27And more.
10:29Out!
10:29Out!
10:30I cast you out!
10:38Keep them coming, Gale.
10:40Almost done.
10:41Oh my, I feel like I could fall into this one.
10:45Bob, I thought you didn't want to become the anus restaurant.
10:48Well, I've embraced it.
10:50We are the anus restaurant, Lynn.
10:53Anus! Anus, kids!
10:54Anus! Anus! Anus!
10:57That's right. Go tell your friends.
10:59Or don't. Either way, it's your choice.
11:02Hey, you asked for this, Lynn.
11:04I'm just doing what you wanted me to do.
11:06Support your sister.
11:07Oh, what a crock of crap.
11:09This is about you and your pride and that Edith,
11:13and you just want to provoke her.
11:14Damn right I do.
11:17This one big enough for you, Edith.
11:20Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
11:24Ah!
11:25Fresh from their triumphant debut at Bob's Burgers.
11:28That's right, gallery-quality paintings at sidewalk prices.
11:32Art lover, check this out.
11:34Hey, that's Dr. Yap. He's my dentist.
11:36That's a good likeness in the face, but, uh,
11:39I guess the proportions are off.
11:40No, Ed, the proportions are right.
11:42Well, I'm getting adult braces.
11:44So?
11:45So I should know.
11:46Dr. Yap has short, strong legs and his torso is...
11:48I'm off to do some more roller skating!
11:51You know what?
11:52I've done all I can for you hacks.
11:54You refuse to paint touristy art.
11:56Dad won't let me cut off Jean's ear.
11:57We're through!
11:58We are through!
11:59I'm dropping you as my clients,
12:01and I'm dropping you as my siblings.
12:04Go take some art classes, you wannabes!
12:07Hey!
12:08Andy!
12:09Ollie!
12:09You too, Red!
12:10Come here!
12:12You ever heard of the game,
12:14you guys paint whatever I say and then I sell it?
12:17Does the winner get a hug from Ollie?
12:19Yeah, Andy, you can have one of those any old time.
12:23Now?
12:24Mmm!
12:25Sugar!
12:26All right, stop hugging!
12:27Let's paint!
12:28Let's paint shells and sunsets and crap!
12:30Yay!
12:33Attention, everyone!
12:35This installation is not approved by the Art Crawl Association!
12:40It's obscene and should be taken down immediately!
12:44Well, I'll tell you this.
12:45It doesn't need to be approved by the Art Crawl Association
12:49because this is now a permanent installation!
12:53Permanent?
12:53You'll regret this, Bob!
12:55Oh, is that a threat?
12:56Oh, when I threaten you, you'll know it!
12:58Yeah, when she threatens you, you'll know it!
13:01Okay, was that a threat?
13:02You bet it was!
13:04Is that supposed to scare me?
13:05Definitely!
13:09Yes!
13:12You want some water?
13:14He would never drink your water!
13:16I really need...
13:18He's fine!
13:20You're fine.
13:21Could use some water.
13:22You're fine.
13:23Bob, water.
13:24No!
13:25He'd rather die than drink your water!
13:27I wouldn't!
13:28Yes, he would!
13:29I'd drink it!
13:30No water, Harold!
13:32Please!
13:33Never!
13:33No!
13:47Edith!
13:50Unbelievable.
13:51This is nuts.
13:52I can't believe Edith would do this!
13:54Oh!
13:54My artwork!
13:56It's ruined!
13:57They painted underpants on my beautiful anuses!
14:01Gail!
14:01Gail!
14:02No need to go up the deep end, okay?
14:04You should be flattered, right?
14:06All the great artists get censored.
14:08They do, Edith.
14:09Yes!
14:09Yes!
14:10All of them do!
14:11Every...
14:11All the good ones!
14:12Oh, God!
14:13What a whirlwind we've been on!
14:15I feel like...
14:15Let's just put this all behind us and move on!
14:18I'm going down there.
14:19What?
14:19Where?
14:20To see Edith.
14:21Bobby!
14:21Don't do anything crazy!
14:23I'm not crazy.
14:24They're crazy.
14:25And they're not going to get away with it.
14:29Glue that shell in the middle, Andy!
14:31What are you doing?
14:33My hand is cramping up.
14:34I ate too much glue!
14:36Andy, Ollie, come here.
14:38Listen.
14:38I'm pushing you because you've got talent, babies.
14:43And I'm going to take care of you.
14:44Oh, you better believe it.
14:46But first, you've got to make some money for Mommy.
14:49Okay, babies?
14:50You too, Red.
14:51What's your name, sweetheart?
14:52Kevin Mitchell.
14:53Shut up!
14:54It doesn't matter!
14:55Stop talking!
14:57Start working!
14:58Work!
14:59Shells go in the middle!
15:01There you go.
15:03One-of-a-kind original.
15:05Help support these poor, deformed orphans.
15:08Twenty bucks.
15:11Whoa.
15:12That's pissed.
15:13That's a take five?
15:15For me!
15:16Not you!
15:19Oh, look, everyone.
15:21The town pornographer.
15:23Can it, Edith?
15:24I'm here to get an apology.
15:25For what?
15:26Standing up for artistic integrity and common decency?
15:29There's nothing decent about what you did.
15:32First, you tried to tell me what to put on my walls.
15:34Then, you vandalized it.
15:35Have you no shame?
15:37I have no idea what you're talking about.
15:39And neither does he.
15:40What?
15:41Hit her, Dad!
15:41I'm not going to hit her, Louise.
15:43Hit her, Dad!
15:44Jean?
15:45Tina?
15:45What are you two doing here?
15:46Learning to paint.
15:47We're holding our craft.
15:49Okay, well, good luck trying to polish a turd.
15:51Wait, I thought you hated my kids.
15:53My art workshop is open to all who respect art.
15:56So I'll have to ask you to leave.
15:58Then ask me.
15:59Please leave.
16:00Not before I get an apology.
16:02Not on your life.
16:03Have it your way, art lady.
16:05Hey.
16:06Poker in the eye with the brush.
16:07Oh, I've got a better idea, Louise.
16:09Ha, ha, ha.
16:10Take that.
16:12Oh.
16:13Dad, what is that?
16:14It's an anus.
16:15Oh.
16:16What else would it be?
16:17What has this been all about?
16:19You call that an anus?
16:20It looks just like a black dot.
16:22What kind of anus is that?
16:23Oh.
16:24Well, then, Harold, it looks like I'll need to practice a little more.
16:27I'll say.
16:27I want one right here.
16:29Oh.
16:29God.
16:29And what about here?
16:30Ow.
16:31This one might need an anus.
16:32Ow.
16:33How about this lighthouse?
16:34I have an anus now.
16:36Oh.
16:36Looking good, Dad.
16:38Thanks, teen.
16:39Rip that lighthouse a new one, Dad.
16:41I feel so alive.
16:42This is what God must feel like.
16:44Kids, tell your mother not to wait up.
16:47Use the brown.
16:48Use the brown.
16:54You should have seen it, Mom.
16:56Dad went nuts.
16:57Oh, Bobby, what'd you do?
16:59I got justice, Lynn.
17:00Dad painted an anus on a lighthouse.
17:03Yeah, and on a mountain, and on a sunset, and on a sailboat.
17:07And on Dr. Yap.
17:08And Ken.
17:09Yeah, but sorry I painted on your paintings, kids.
17:11They were in the line of fire.
17:13You painted anuses on paintings?
17:15Where's Gail?
17:16I gotta tell her how I stood up for her.
17:17She's in the basement trying to get the underwear off of paintings.
17:21You shouldn't have done it, Bob.
17:22Are you kidding, Lynn?
17:23It's the best thing I've ever done in my life.
17:26Ow.
17:26See?
17:27That's how you put on handcuffs.
17:28They don't look tight enough to me.
17:30Why are these on me?
17:31Because you anally defaced her property.
17:33But she started it.
17:34Look what she did.
17:35Oh.
17:36I like the new direction and wish I could take credit.
17:38But like I said, I had nothing to do with it.
17:41Yeah, we'll see about that.
17:42I'm pressing charges.
17:43We're gonna take this to court.
17:45Wait, now you're charging her?
17:46This is confusing.
17:48Is Dad going to jail?
17:49I'll wait for you.
17:50Word of advice, Dad.
17:51Don't tell your cellmate what you're in for.
17:53I hope our new dad is a blonde.
17:55I can't take it anymore.
17:57Edith didn't paint the underwear.
17:59I did it.
18:01But you painted all those underpants, Linda?
18:04No, I couldn't help it.
18:05Those anuses were haunting me in my sleep.
18:31You're the one who said we had to support your sister.
18:33I did support her until I figured out a way to destroy her art while preserving her feelings
18:39and blaming someone else.
18:40I thought those looked familiar.
18:42Oh, yeah.
18:43Mom, you painted your own underwear.
18:46What?
18:46How do you know what my underwear looks like?
18:49How don't I know?
18:50She wears it around the house, flaunting it like she's all that.
18:53I do not.
18:54Okay, Bobby.
18:55Let's go to jail.
18:56Wait, wait, wait, wait.
18:57Can I...
18:58Edith, can I just pay for the paintings?
18:59Well, the retail value of what you destroyed was over $1,000.
19:04We'll give you $200.
19:05We haven't sold a burger all week, Lynn.
19:07We don't have that kind of money.
19:08I got this one, Dad.
19:12Are we good here?
19:13Fine.
19:14We'll take it.
19:15Me and you can settle up later.
19:17Where the hell did you get all that money from?
19:18Shh.
19:19Don't ask.
19:20Don't ask.
19:20It's our girl.
19:21But...
19:22Shh.
19:22Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
19:24Please.
19:24Shut your mouth.
19:25What the...
19:25It's our girl.
19:26But I...
19:27Shh, shut your mouth.
19:28Shut your mouth.
19:30I said shut your mouth.
19:31It's our girl.
19:32Come on, Harold.
19:33Let's get out of this ass parlor.
19:35Stinks.
19:35Ah, okay.
19:39You know, Linda, none of this would have happened if you'd just been honest with your sister.
19:42It's true, Mom.
19:43I've been honest with these two since the day Gene got back.
19:46I remember the ice cream sandwich that did it.
19:48I regret nothing.
19:50And Tina, bad breath every day.
19:52Not if you like fish.
19:53See how tough they are?
19:54We've been desensitized.
19:56I'm so numb.
19:57All right, from now on, I'm going to be honest with my sister.
20:00She deserves to know the truth.
20:02I did it.
20:03I did it.
20:04I fixed all the paintings.
20:06I added pants and huge pendulous breasts.
20:09Oh, I'm so excited.
20:11I think it's my best work ever.
20:12What do you think?
20:14I'm not hearing anything.
20:17Oh, my God.
20:19Gail, it's beautiful.
20:20They're great.
20:21They're great.
20:22They're great.
20:24They are very, very...
20:26Yeah, look at that.
20:27I knew it.
20:27I knew they were great.
20:29Here, you hang these, and I'm going to go back down and finish the rest of them.
20:33Oh, I couldn't do it.
20:34I wouldn't have done it.
20:35There's exceptions to the honesty policy.
20:37Yeah, yeah.
20:38I mean, Lynn, you did the right thing.
20:40Oh, thank you for supporting me.
20:42I want to hug each and every one of you.
20:44Come here, all of you.
20:45Come on.
20:54Do you think she's coming back?
20:56I don't know.
20:56I'm so cold.
20:58Cut me open and crawl inside me.
21:00One of us should live.
21:02Okay.
21:03Mama's coming back!
21:05And Mama better see some paintings!
21:08Ah!
21:34Let's get out of this ass parlor.
21:36It stinks.
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