00:01that's not right that's so unreasonable yeah well if you're going to be like this and I don't want
00:07to talk to you right now either okay I love you bye Amazon customer support no my mother guess
00:18who she's insisting we invite to our wedding Jesus if only my brother wait a minute you didn't invite
00:27your brother to your own wedding he tormented me my whole childhood I don't think I should reward
00:33that type of behavior with a slice of wedding cake in the shape of the Millennium Falcon try
00:39again a slice of wedding cake in the shape of a cake look he may have been mean to you
00:46when you
00:46were kids but you're both grown men now that's right I'm a grown-up and if I don't want to
00:51invite
00:52him to my wedding then I won't okay except I have to because my mommy's making me
00:58our whole universe was in a hot tent state that nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started
01:05wait
01:05the earth began to cool the autotrophs began to drew me and recalls developed tools we built a wall
01:11math science history unraveling the mystery that all started with a big bang
01:25okay so each welcome bag gets a schedule of events a map and chocolate from me and from
01:31Sheldon a bottle of Purell the number for poison control in case someone accidentally drinks the
01:38Purell and a laminated table of elements because the American school system is a failure
01:46how many out-of-town guests are there gonna be I'm actually not sure turns out Sheldon didn't
01:50invite his brother oh now it's starting to sound like a wedding and his mom said she won't come if
01:56his brother's not there well now it's starting to sound like a good wedding hey Bernie how do you
02:03know if someone has pink eye um their eye would be red swollen and probably oozy okay thanks both
02:11kids have pink eye you stop right there I'm getting married in a week you are not giving
02:17me pink eye I don't have pink eye hey hey hey let's step away from the bride okay I'll go
02:25back
02:26upstairs get in the shower and then take those clothes and burn them yeah and all the rest of
02:30your clothes worth a shot so am I gonna be like the only single guy at Sheldon's wedding oh there'll
02:42be a lot of single people there Stewart Amy's great aunt although Stewart's already friended her
02:49on Facebook so better move quick I gotta find a date I don't want to be that sad single friend
02:56that
02:56everyone looks at with pity I'm afraid that ship may have sailed Leonard you have a brother right yes
03:06is he the worst is he an unspeakable abomination does the very thought of him make your skin crawl
03:13laughs at his own jokes but otherwise he's okay Sheldon what's going on I'm trying to invite my stupid
03:20brother to my wedding and he's avoiding my calls you don't know he's avoiding your calls
03:28hey you've reached George Cooper please leave a message unless this is Sheldon again in which case
03:33please try me on my other number 1-800-SUCK-IT see and I know that's not a real number
03:43because why would
03:44it be toll free Sheldon you tried what more could you have done hey why didn't you invite him in
03:50the
03:51first place you don't know what it was like growing up with him I get it I grew up with
03:56lots of brothers
03:57my brother a dude was especially mean really I've never heard you mention a dude sure I have he's the
04:03one who left the door open when your kids and my pet mongoose run away stupid a dude look it's
04:12short of
04:12getting on a plane and flying there what does your mother expect you to do I kept saying no how
04:20am I
04:21here hey did I tell you I found a date to the wedding uh to coffee but if things go
04:29well Sheldon and Amy's
04:30wedding aren't you worried it's a little intense to ask someone you just met to go to a wedding
04:36I'm running out of time why can't there be a service where you can just pay someone to be your
04:41date for
04:42the evening like an escort service no no no you you wouldn't be paying for sex I mean obviously if
04:51things went well it could lead to sex but but the money is for like you know a time companionship
04:56oh I
04:57get it an escort service stop saying that stop meaning it hey Raj remember when you borrowed my
05:07VR goggles the other day yeah probably shouldn't have done that
05:18so wait your brother is dr. tire yes and apparently it only takes half a semester of community college to
05:25get that
05:26particular doctorate we passed three of these stores on the way here why did you say he's just some loser
05:32who sells tires
05:34you're right that was unfair he's a loser who sells more tires than anyone in texas
05:43oh excuse me uh we're looking for a georgie cooper one second I'll check to see if the doctor's in
05:49he is not a doctor only one doctor here and it's me
05:56i'm also a doctor you want to wait in the car i wanted to wait in california
06:04so is this georgie yes and what is he even using that stethoscope to listen to
06:11you i don't know small leak all right that makes sense
06:18what the hell are you doing here hello georgie it's just george now fine george no i don't like
06:26it georgie i see you haven't changed one bit thank you that is a nice thing to say
06:33hey i'm leonard i'm here for for no reason what do you want sheldon why aren't you returning my phone
06:41calls you're supposed to be the smart one you figure it out he's not that kind of smart you might
06:48want
06:48to give him a hint we haven't talked in over 10 years now that you need something you think you
06:54can
06:55just show up at my store well let's just drop everything to accommodate sheldon nice try but i'm
07:01not a gullible little boy anymore i can recognize sarcasm okay you're right i'm i'm i'm sorry tell
07:09me what you need your wish is my command that's better thank you oh my god
07:25yeah i got it too you really can't keep your hands off howard can you i know i have a
07:31problem
07:33i just wanted to make sure you and amy didn't get it well i didn't get it
07:40you infected me a week before my wedding
07:44what am i supposed to do about this wear a veil
07:51that's not funny look at what you've done to me yay it's just like not touch my computer or
08:01like anything else i just oh i don't want to look like that in your wedding photos
08:08there aren't gonna be any wedding photos my fiance's a germaphobe if he finds out i'm contagious
08:13he'll never come back from texas what if we tell him the theme of the wedding is walking dead and
08:18this is our zombie makeup that'll probably work we'll call that plan b
08:26oh well turns out it's gonna come in handy after all
08:35hold up i'm confused you didn't want me at your wedding but now that mom won't come
08:40you want me there i know you don't hear this a lot but that is exactly right good job
08:48not helping sheldon listen here you want me at your wedding all you gotta do is ask nicely
08:58georgie george
09:03i would like you at my wedding thank you sheldon that is so nice to hear
09:11but i would rather swallow a pregnant wildcat and crap out a litter of kittens
09:19it is fitting that you got into tires because you are tiresome
09:25sheldon come on is that too mean no not too mean not too good either
09:38no mother that's not fair but he took yes ma'am but i said yes ma'am goodbye
09:51what'd she say she's not getting in the middle of it because we boys need to work it out ourselves
09:58now maybe it's fine if she doesn't come to the wedding i've got amy now and she can do everything
10:03a mom can do and more say that to her on the wedding night really spice things up
10:10this is all georgie's fault my whole childhood he was mean to me sorry i know what it's like to
10:17live
10:17with a bully your brother bullied you oh i was talking about penny but sure
10:23once when i was eight i was going to dress as my favorite scientist for halloween and georgie
10:28threw my costume away i had to wear a sheet and go as a ghost scared myself all night long
10:37look we don't fly out until the morning why don't i try and talk to him give it one more
10:41shot
10:43all right but if he says nerd says what don't answer him what you are a lamb to the slaughter
10:55so how was your date
10:59it was going well until my eye dripped in her latte
11:05i'm so sorry we ruined your date oh boo hoo his date got ruined i'm about to get married and
11:13look at me
11:16it looks like it's getting better oh does it does it look like that with your two clear eyes
11:23i'm sorry are you mad that i don't have pink eye what do you do yes
11:31uh-huh okay okay listen i hear you i know they're pricey but these are the dallas cowboys of tires
11:40okay and we're talking the troy aikman cowboys not that pretty boy tony romo
11:46all right good call you won't regret it boom wow that was impressive yeah well it's easy when you
11:54love your product and hate tony romo yeah that guy is i said i don't i don't know who that
12:02guy is
12:04if you are here about sheldon's wedding don't bother come on i i know you two have your differences
12:10you mean pretty much everything about us not everything you're both tall have the same last
12:17name maybe i shouldn't have started this like it was a list you have no idea what you are talking
12:24about oh there that that was very sheldon look i i'm sure he was not the easiest brother to have
12:33but
12:33it wasn't easy for him either with you picking on him all the time picking on him is that what
12:40he
12:40told you what about the time he threw away his halloween costume well yeah because he was gonna
12:46dress as some girl scientist madame curie oh i didn't know she was madame
12:57come on he was still gonna get beat up for wearing that dress didn't you sit on his head while
13:03he tried
13:03to watch star trek well yeah but that was hilarious that is pretty hilarious look i mean i always looked
13:13out for him at school i drove him everywhere i apologized to people when he was rude i've done
13:19all that i've also removed all the red balloons from his lucky charms because they weren't irish enough
13:25all right so you know what i'm talking about and has he ever thanked you
13:30not in so many words or any words would it kill him to actually say it no no it wouldn't
13:40kill him
13:45leonard you know how i got the money to open up my first store
13:51i busted my ass for it because all the extra money that we had had to go to sheldon so
13:56he could go to
13:56college and he could go study in germany and you know what he's never said to me danke shane
14:07it's uh thank you in german do you need me to sit on your head
14:13nope after all my sacrifices guess which kid my mom is the most proud of
14:24sheldon too leonard you want a beer yeah i would love a beer there you go
14:33yes can you open it for me no it's a twist off i know
14:49hey got all the beads to the other side
14:53it's not a puzzle honey
14:56do you really want to be touching that do you know how many sick kids you know never mind knock
15:01yourself out
15:05bernadette says they're checking the kids now you know maybe we didn't all need to come
15:09hey whatever kind of pink eye their kids have i have and i need to know and if it's viral
15:15i'm screwed
15:16maybe not yeah i know it's not traditional wedding attire but how about a welder's mask
15:23if you know a welder that could be your something borrowed
15:28great news it's bacterial
15:32what are you doing watch your hands not you
15:40hello room service i'm calling about the club sandwich on your menu
15:45no i i don't want one i just want you to spell it correctly
15:50fine unless the club is the poor typing club
15:54okay now let's discuss this 15 percent gratuity
16:02well that was rude someone just lost their gratuity
16:10sheldon you need to apologize to your brother
16:13i'm sorry yes like that but nicer and that way
16:18i have nothing to apologize for huh i told you this is a bad idea sometimes you can't patch a
16:24tire
16:24you just gotta buy a new one actually that's always the case never patch buy new
16:30while i appreciate your folksy tire wisdom i don't appreciate what you're putting mom through
16:35what would you know about what mom's been through you were never home this is good get it all out
16:40not
16:41shut up you went away to college after dad died who do you think took care of everything
16:46mom did mom always took care of everything mom was a mess missy was a dumb teenager i had to
16:53look after
16:54both of them i talked to mom all the time if she was upset she would have told me she
16:59was protecting you
17:00you idiot just like everyone always does if things were bad then why didn't you tell me because i was
17:07protecting you too
17:11you're my baby brother sheldon i know life has been hard for you
17:17but that don't mean it's been easy for the rest of us
17:22i suppose i didn't think about how it was for everyone else
17:26no that's all right i know you didn't
17:32i'm sorry
17:36thank you and it would mean a lot to me to have my big brother at my wedding
17:46i wouldn't miss it
17:54is it me or did we just patch a tire
18:01he said never patch do you even listen
18:15hey how's it going
18:19really good georgie's going to come to the wedding oh that's great why aren't you looking at the
18:26camera oh you know i'm just working on my peripheral vision
18:31that is nonsense your peripheral vision is fine are those women's magazines making you feel bad about
18:38yourself again
18:41yep that is what's happening
18:44i have told you before those women are airbrushed to make it look like they have good vision
18:52hey i i was thinking now that you and your brother made up there's no reason to rush home
18:58maybe you and leonard could could stay for uh two to three more fun-filled days there
19:07that's a great idea hey leonard good news we do have time to visit the museum of the american railroad
19:17i'd say no but what's the point
19:24oh you might not want to get too close pink eye
19:30me too
19:33bacterial yeah same
19:37i know this is going to sound crazy but would you be interested in going to a wedding with me
19:49um
19:53uh
19:54uh
19:55um
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