00:03Ladies and gentlemen, if any of you are looking for something to do on Valentine's Day, Amy
00:09and I will be streaming our first ever live episode of Fun With Flags.
00:13You're welcome to join us as we celebrate the timeless love affair between wind and
00:17flapping fabric.
00:19Penny and I have dinner reservations that night, but any other time, no.
00:25Sorry, Bernie and I are breaking in the new hot tub, if you know what I mean.
00:28Not a clue.
00:29Raj.
00:31Spending Valentine's Day with Emily.
00:34Don't sound very excited about it.
00:36No, I am.
00:37I am.
00:38I guess I'm still wondering if Emily and I write for each other.
00:41Does this have to do with that girl you had coffee with?
00:44You mean the strong, sexy angel I can't stop thinking about?
00:47Who can say?
00:49You've been talking about breaking up with Emily forever.
00:52Why don't you just do it already?
00:53Let's get it over with.
00:54Well, you say it like it's easy.
00:56Have any one of you ever broken up with anyone?
01:03No, not really.
01:05You know, once I ordered an Uber by accident, I just got in and went somewhere.
01:12Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state that nearly 14 million years ago, expansion started way around.
01:20The earth began to cool, the autotropes began to drool, meanderthals, develop tools, we built a wall.
01:25We built a pyramid, smart science, history unraveling the mystery that all started with a big bang.
01:39So, you're really going to break up with her?
01:42Yeah, I think so.
01:44Do you have any advice?
01:45Well, I have broken up with my fair share of guys.
01:48I mean, how many times did I break up with Leonard?
01:49I stopped counting at four.
01:53All right, my advice to you is do it at her place.
01:55You can leave when you need to.
01:56Tell the truth, make it quick, and be prepared for tears.
02:00Oh, I'm going to do a pre-cry before I go in there.
02:02Really dry myself out.
02:06She meant Emily.
02:07No, I really didn't.
02:11You're seriously breaking up with me?
02:14Yeah.
02:14And you thought right before Valentine's Day was a good time to do it?
02:19You're right.
02:20Let's talk again in a few days.
02:23Hey, Claire.
02:24Hi, it's Rajesh.
02:26I was wondering if you're free for Valentine's Day.
02:29Sorry, I just got back with my boyfriend.
02:31But I just broke up with my girlfriend.
02:33Right before Valentine's Day?
02:35What an ass.
02:38Please take me back.
02:39I love what it's meant to be.
02:42I'm going to be all alone on Valentine's Day.
02:47You were right.
02:48Tears.
02:51Okay.
02:52And we are live in 22 minutes.
02:55I'm nervous.
02:56I hope people will be around to watch, even though it's Valentine's Day.
03:00People who are fans of an internet show about flags, trust me, they're around.
03:05Boy, speaking of Valentine's Day, I haven't forgotten about you tonight.
03:09What do you mean?
03:10Well, you've become such an integral part of my life, as well as this show, I felt it only
03:15right to include your name in the title.
03:20That is so sweet.
03:22So, from now on, this program will officially be known as Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah
03:28Fowler present Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun with Flags.
03:35Catchy.
03:40I'm going to check the temp on the tone.
03:44Don't make it too hot.
03:45Sorry, but too hot is the only temperature I come in.
03:55Look at that.
03:56You shaved it all.
04:00You're welcome.
04:03Um, question.
04:05This is my first hot tub.
04:06Is it supposed to come with a rat flopping around in it?
04:11Ew, really?
04:12Get it out.
04:13How?
04:14Uh, I wish we had a skimmer.
04:17You turn off the jets.
04:18I'll get a strainer from the kitchen.
04:20I don't know how to turn off the jets.
04:22I don't know where you keep the strainer.
04:27Excuse me.
04:30Bad news.
04:31The maitre d' said it's going to be at least an hour.
04:33An hour?
04:34What?
04:34That's crazy.
04:34We have a reservation.
04:36I know.
04:36So, what did you say?
04:37Thanks.
04:38Sorry to bother you.
04:40But I said it like a badass.
04:45All right.
04:45Well, can't you, like, slip him some money or something?
04:47Really?
04:48Never done that before.
04:49Does it work?
04:49Do people like money?
04:51Is that what you're asking?
04:53A lot of attitude from the woman who thought MC Squared was a rapper.
04:57Now, is that a smart thing to say on a holiday that's basically National Sex Night?
05:02I'm sorry.
05:02You're pretty.
05:03I'm stupid.
05:06Hello.
05:07Uh, just checking again for Hofstetter.
05:10Still going to be an hour?
05:11I'm afraid so.
05:12Okay.
05:13Thanks.
05:16Hey.
05:19I think you may have dropped this.
05:23Oh.
05:24Anybody lose a 20?
05:25I did.
05:38Oh, I took care of it.
05:42Okay.
05:43We are live in five, four, three.
05:47Oh, wait.
05:48Oh, shoot.
05:48I already pushed the button.
05:49Never mind.
05:49We're live.
05:51Hello.
05:52And welcome to a special live edition of Dr. Sheldon Cooper.
05:56And Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present...
05:59Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun with Flags.
06:03Consider tonight's episode a Valentine's Day gift for you, our viewers.
06:09It's also my gift to you.
06:11That was clear, right?
06:12Because you're not getting anything else.
06:15Since we're live, you'll finally be able to reach out to us with your flag thoughts and
06:20flag questions.
06:22Allow us to answer a few quick ones that we get all the time.
06:25Uh, yes, I really am a doctor.
06:28Uh, yes, she really is my girlfriend.
06:32No, I just blink a lot.
06:34It's not Morse code for rescue me.
06:43Oh, uh, okay.
06:45Uh, here's our first call.
06:48Hello, and welcome to Fun with Flags.
06:50What's your question?
06:52What is wrong with me?
06:53Why am I so self-destructive?
06:59Rajesh?
07:00Yes.
07:00Whenever things are going well, I always find a way to ruin it.
07:03You two look happy.
07:05How do you do it?
07:06I think it starts with good communication.
07:08You know what?
07:08That's not a flag question.
07:09Next caller.
07:13I hope you don't think I'm just saying this because it's Valentine's Day, but I love you
07:19so much.
07:20I'm going to put this down your robe.
07:24It's not moving, but I think it's still alive.
07:28Well, should we put it back in there a few minutes?
07:32No.
07:33You know, and it's not a rat.
07:35It's a rabbit.
07:36We need to save it.
07:38How do we do that?
07:40I don't know.
07:41Look it up on your phone.
07:42I'm going to wrap it in a towel.
07:45Taking care of injured rabbit.
07:48Okay.
07:49Make sure it's comfortable and warm.
07:52It's just in a hot tub.
07:53I'm going to say check.
07:55Anything else?
07:56To make sure it's not dehydrated, feed him an electrolyte solution.
07:59If it's not responding, use a warm cloth to wash its face and genitals.
08:05Yeah.
08:11This is ridiculous.
08:13You know, I'm going to go talk to the maitre d.
08:15What are you going to say?
08:16I don't know.
08:17I'm going to flirt with him.
08:19I don't know if I'm comfortable with that.
08:21I'm still sleeping with you tonight.
08:23See if you can get a table by the window.
08:29Hi there.
08:31What's your name?
08:32Glenn.
08:32Oh boy, it is crazy in here tonight, huh Glenn?
08:36Well, you know, Valentine's Day.
08:38Yes.
08:38I bet your girlfriend is super bummed you had to work tonight.
08:42Anyway, look, we have been waiting a while and I just...
08:46With all due respect, ma'am, there's nothing I can do.
08:50You don't have to call me ma'am.
08:52Okay.
08:52I mean, we're basically the same age.
08:55Okay.
09:01How old are you?
09:02I'm 21.
09:03How old are you?
09:05Just shut up, Glenn.
09:08Come on, let's get out of here.
09:09What?
09:10Why?
09:10Because I'm young.
09:11Let's go.
09:15Rajesh, it's perfectly normal to have doubts after breaking up with someone.
09:19You really think so?
09:21You know what's not normal?
09:23Blubbering about emotions during a flag show.
09:26Unless that emotion is excitement over New Zealand changing their flag.
09:31Good luck, you crazy Kiwis.
09:33We're rooting for you.
09:35Your friend is hurting.
09:37No, Sheldon's right.
09:39Emily did say I always talk about my feelings too much.
09:43I suppose that could be a legitimate concern in a relationship.
09:47Perhaps even a red flag.
09:50And speaking of red flags, check out this sexy number from the former Soviet Union.
09:55Hubba hubba.
09:59Oh, uh, we have another caller.
10:02Hi, you're on fun with flags.
10:05I'm on fun with flags.
10:06Hello, I want to talk about how lonely I am too.
10:11Kripke?
10:12Is that you?
10:12Yeah, I'm just sitting here, all by myself, wondering if I'll ever find someone to share
10:17my wife with.
10:19Preferably Asian, 18 to 24, no fatties.
10:24Please, all comments and questions should be flag-related.
10:28All right, is my pole flag-awaited?
10:38I don't see why not.
10:47He's eating, that's a good sign.
10:49You're going to have to wait one hour until you can go swimming again.
10:55He's pretty cute.
10:56He is.
10:58Should we name him?
11:01It is Valentine's Day.
11:03How about Valentino?
11:06Nice.
11:07A classic rabbit name.
11:10Peter Rabbit, Roger Rabbit, Valentino Wolowitz Rabbit.
11:15Oh, look at all that chest hair and overbite.
11:19Of course, you're a Wolowitz.
11:22Son of a bitch, he bit me.
11:25Are you okay?
11:26No, I'm not okay.
11:27Wild rabbits can have rabies.
11:30Oh, why'd you put your finger near its mouth?
11:33Poor judgment, obviously.
11:37He's so little, I'm sure it's fine.
11:39How can it be fine?
11:39I just got attacked by a clearly anti-Semitic wild animal.
11:46It's not what we planned, but this isn't so bad, right?
11:49It's not what we planned, but this isn't so bad, right?
11:50It was freaking amazing.
11:53Well, glad you're feeling better.
11:55I was just hungry and cranky.
11:57And I've never been called ma'am before.
12:00Is that a big deal?
12:01Kind of.
12:02When was the first time someone called you sir?
12:04Sixth grade, but I wore a sport coat and carried a briefcase.
12:10Can you believe when I met you I was 22?
12:13I mean, it's crazy.
12:14Where did all that time go?
12:17You watched The Bachelor a lot.
12:20Go ahead and make jokes, but your 30s are almost over.
12:23No, they're not.
12:24You're closer to 40 than you are 30.
12:27Ha ha!
12:28You married an old man.
12:31Tell you what, let's do something fun tonight.
12:34Won't make us any younger.
12:35Well, maybe not, but someday we actually will be old.
12:38And we'll look back on this night and remember what a good time we had.
12:42Okay, like what?
12:44I know.
12:46Food fight!
12:53I'll keep thinking.
12:57Look, I know you both feel bad about being alone, but sometimes the best thing you can do is take
13:02a little time for yourself, especially when you just got out of a relationship.
13:06Speaking of ending relationships, when British Honduras became Belize, they designed a new flag with a tree on it.
13:16And I would like to hang myself from that tree.
13:25But Amy, when you and Sheldon split up, didn't you start dating someone right away?
13:30Well, I wouldn't say right away.
13:32And actually, it was three different men.
13:35Three different men?
13:37Damn, girl, way to give the milk away!
13:41Aw, looks like we just lost Kripke.
13:44No, actually, I'm still here.
13:47Now?
13:48Yep.
13:49Now?
13:50Yep.
13:51Now?
13:53Aw, looks like we just lost Kripke.
13:56Before, Emily, I was alone for so long.
13:59I don't know if I can do that again.
14:01Well, you know, here is something that might cheer you up.
14:04The flag of the Isle of Man is nothing but three legs sharing a weird pair of underpants.
14:10So, you think you got problems.
14:14I have an idea.
14:17Maybe someone in our audience would be interested in meeting Rajesh.
14:21Ladies, I can attest that he is a kind, handsome, intelligent...
14:25Rich parents!
14:26Don't forget rich parents!
14:30Spoiled astrophysicist who not only...
14:32Oh.
14:34Well, that was quick.
14:37Hi.
14:37You're on fun with flags.
14:39Hey, I think I got cut off.
14:44Hello, Kripke.
14:45I have a flag question.
14:47How many men did you have sex with?
14:53Let's see.
14:53What's young and fun?
14:56Uh, we could go dancing.
14:57Are you actually gonna dance?
14:59Of course.
15:00Yeah, no one wants to see that.
15:02Hey, how about skinny dipping at the beach?
15:05No, I don't need any fish nibbling my business.
15:09Oh, there's a screening of Moulin Rouge.
15:11I heard the crowd sings along and stuff.
15:13That sounds fun.
15:14When's it start?
15:15Midnight.
15:16Midnight, really?
15:19You know what?
15:19Let's do it.
15:21Okay, great.
15:23Oh, wait.
15:24Uh, it's sold out.
15:25Oh, thank God.
15:29It says rabies and rabbits is highly unlikely.
15:32Terrific.
15:33It's not terrific.
15:34Lots of highly unlikely things happen.
15:36You saw what's under this robe, and you still married me.
15:40If you're really worried, we'll take him to the vet and have him tested.
15:43Good.
15:44Okay, there is a test.
15:46All they have to do is cut off his head and check his brain.
15:50Oh, cut off his head?
15:52That's where his little nose is.
15:56He's not showing any symptoms.
15:59I guess I'll just go to the emergency room to be safe.
16:03Howie, this is just your hypochondria.
16:05When I sat on the mute button and thought I'd gone deaf, that was my hypochondria.
16:18We'll find another time to tell him I'm pregnant.
16:28I mean, this is the first time I've ever broken up with someone.
16:32I just, I didn't realize it was going to hurt this much.
16:35It really can.
16:37All right.
16:40Nothing about this is fun.
16:43No one wants to talk about flags, but I haven't spoken in over ten minutes.
16:49So, enjoy your new show, Internet.
16:53Did Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present with?
17:00I'm sorry for bothering you.
17:02I'll hang up now.
17:03Hold on, Rajesh.
17:05You know, you're not being very sympathetic.
17:06You know firsthand that breakups are hard.
17:10Fine.
17:12If you insist on making me a part of this, yes.
17:14I acknowledge how painful they can be.
17:17However, pain has an evolutionary purpose.
17:21It provides information from the environment that behavior isn't good for us.
17:27Like when I fell in love with that stripper and bought her a Prius.
17:33Raj, I'm just going to push all the buttons.
17:37Raj, I'm sorry you're suffering.
17:40When Amy and I were broken up, I also suffered.
17:43And this may sound surprising, but I'm grateful for having gone through it.
17:49Really?
17:51Yes.
17:53I believe our relationship now is stronger than ever.
17:57So do I.
17:58When we were apart, I learned how important you are to me.
18:03And I realize that when two people are in love, sometimes they...
18:08Happy Valentine's Day!
18:13We are young and fun!
18:21I stand corrected.
18:23Fun.
18:32Congratulations on a successful live show.
18:35And a lovely Valentine's Day.
18:40Cleaning up is not young and fun.
18:43It can be.
18:45Confetti fight!
18:52Maybe you should take a break.
18:53I got this.
18:58Did you know the singular of confetti is confetto?
19:03Interesting.
19:04And when would you use the singular?
19:06I'm glad you asked.
19:07Amy, you have a confetto in your nose.
19:11No, no, no.
19:12Other side.
19:13There you go.
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