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Watch The Big Bang Theory AMZN GalaxyTV Season 12 Episode 17 online in HD on Dailymotion.
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00:01Previously on The Big Bang Theory...
00:03The drug I've been working on for the past five years just got approved by the FDA.
00:06Wow! Congratulations! Was that the decongestant you developed?
00:10No, we had to rebrand that as a solvent for mining equipment.
00:14It's her anti-inflammatory drug.
00:17Yup, three years of testing and no reported side effects.
00:19Yeah, so it works.
00:21Eh.
00:23Well, congratulations. I'm so happy for you.
00:26Yeah, well, I'm happy for you because I want you to head up my sales team.
00:29Really? Me? Don't you want someone with more experience?
00:32Yup, the job's all yours.
00:34Alright, now I'm sure some of you are wondering, who is this woman?
00:37How did she get to be in charge of the sales team?
00:40Is it because she's friends with Dr. Rostenkowski?
00:43Because she is.
00:45Is it because she was Miss Cornhusker, 2001, and still fits in those very same jeans?
00:50Because she was, and she does, and they're actually a little baggy.
00:56And the absence of side effects means that Inflaminex can be taken in conjunction with other medications.
01:01It's a brand new day.
01:03Such a good tagline. I forgot who came up with that.
01:06You did.
01:07That's right, I did!
01:09Okay, I know it's late, I've been working you guys really hard, so I have a little treat for you.
01:13We get to go home?
01:14No, you get to stay here and get vitamin B12 shots.
01:18Oh my god, you guys are still here?
01:22We're happy to be here, it's a brand new day.
01:25It's 1215, it's literally a brand new day.
01:30Everybody go home.
01:33Very fine, go, get out of here. Go on.
01:37I think things are going pretty good.
01:39Are you aware that Dave's in the break room crying?
01:41Yeah, I told him if he's going to be a crybaby, go to the break room.
01:45I just really want to be prepared for this conference.
01:47You're going to do great.
01:49You really think so?
01:49Of course, they're scared of you, you're scared of me.
01:52The system works.
01:55Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state
01:58that nearly 14 million years ago, expansion started way back.
02:02The earth began to cool, the autotrophs began to drew me in.
02:05With all the developed tools, we built a wall, we built a pyramid.
02:08Snap, science, history, unraveling the mystery that all started with a big bang.
02:13Hey!
02:22Hey, Howie, I'm going.
02:24Have a great conference.
02:26Thanks.
02:27Remember, I'm leaving you with two babies.
02:29I expect to see two babies when I get back, and they better be the same two babies, because I'll
02:32know.
02:34I think I'm capable of babysitting.
02:37Don't call it babysitting, they're your children, it's called parenting.
02:41What's the difference?
02:43You don't get paid.
02:46No, the emergency contacts are in their fridge, and I left money for food on the table.
02:50Oh, sounds like I do get paid.
02:54Don't worry, I got this covered.
02:57I know you do.
02:58Quick question, where are the kids right now?
03:01They're upstairs.
03:02They're at daycare.
03:03They're at daycare?
03:03They're upstairs!
03:04Why are you messing with me?
03:14Wow.
03:14That's a lot of luggage for a weekend.
03:16You know, I didn't know what to wear, so I brought a few options.
03:19Was one of the options the option to never come back?
03:24I just really want this weekend to go well.
03:27Doesn't answer my question, but okay.
03:30I love you.
03:31I love you too, and you're gonna do great.
03:33Just relax, stay out of your head, and try to enjoy it.
03:37Aw, it reminds me of what I said to you the first time we slept together.
03:42I'll still use it, it's a mantra.
03:44Yeah.
03:46Oh, thank goodness I caught you before you left.
03:48I'm just going for the weekend.
03:49Just the weekend.
03:50You all heard her say it.
03:52See, your convention is in San Diego, right?
03:54Yes.
03:54Great, I need you to settle a bet for Amy and me.
03:57I say when it's not Comic-Con, no one will be dressed as superheroes.
04:03And I say fewer people will be dressed as superheroes, but still some.
04:08Yeah, a crazy person in a cape doesn't count.
04:11Why not? It counts at Comic-Con.
04:14Also, if you get a chance to sneak into Hall H, last year I left my neck pillow under my
04:19seat.
04:21Third row, second from the aisle.
04:23I'll see what I can do.
04:25At least there'll be one superhero in San Diego.
04:30So Leonard, what are you going to do at Penny Zooey?
04:32I don't know.
04:33Maybe watch a movie with subtitles?
04:36If you're looking for something outside the norm, I have invented a new chess variant where the bishops can also
04:42move like knights.
04:43What do you call that? Bishops be crazy?
04:48First of all, it would be bishops are crazy.
04:51Not if you're being crazy.
04:55Checkmate.
04:58Hey guys.
04:59Hello.
05:00Where are the kids?
05:02I thought they were with you.
05:03What? No!
05:04I'm kidding, they're at daycare.
05:07What about me makes you think my heart can handle that joke?
05:11Hey, you guys wanna come hang out at my place this weekend?
05:15So we can help you babysit?
05:17Uh, it's not babysitting, they're my children.
05:21They're not our children.
05:22Oh, well for you guys then it is babysitting.
05:25No offense, Howard, but I don't wanna spend my weekend around your loud sticky babies.
05:30You can't insult my kids, I am offended.
05:32No, you can't be, I said no offense.
05:34That's like no backsies, but for offense.
05:38What do you say, we'll play some board games? It'll be like a party.
05:40Three guys playing a board game doesn't sound like much of a party.
05:44Someone doesn't remember college very well.
05:49As opposed to the leading non-steroidal anti-inflammatory, our product greatly reduces the risk of ulcers.
05:54So it won't burn a hole in your stomach.
05:56And it won't burn a hole in your wallet either.
06:00I got this.
06:01Thank you for stopping by, it's a brand new day.
06:05See, you're doing great.
06:07Yeah, mediocre actress, great drug pusher, who knew?
06:12Inflamin-X, huh?
06:13So what can you tell me about it?
06:14Well, we have...
06:15Don't waste your time, his name is Danny, he works for one of the other drug companies.
06:19Hey, nothing wrong with checking out the competition?
06:21Aw, we don't see you as competition.
06:24You should.
06:26Our anti-inflammatory is hitting the market this year too.
06:28Well, ours has zero drug interaction risk.
06:31So does an Altoid.
06:34Speaking of Altoids, why don't you go get one?
06:36Okay.
06:38Everyone calm down.
06:39If you can't find a pill for that here, then you're not trying hard enough.
06:43It's alright, I'll go.
06:47I don't know what it is about that guy, but he just gets on my nerves.
06:50Well, you scared the bad man away.
06:52Who's a good girl?
06:57They're still asleep.
06:59Apparently, when I put someone down for a nap, they sleep hard.
07:03That's a weird brag, Howard.
07:07I'll get it.
07:09Bernadette thinks I have poor parenting skills.
07:12Maybe she's basing that on your poor husbanding skills.
07:17Who can say I'm bad at a lot of things?
07:22Hello.
07:23Hi.
07:24Hey.
07:25I didn't think you were coming.
07:26I changed my mind.
07:27I thought it'd be fun to spend some time with your children.
07:30Where are the little scamps?
07:31Scamps?
07:32I'm sorry.
07:33Tykes?
07:33Rugrats?
07:34What is the PC term these days?
07:36What's going on?
07:37Well, we were in the bookstore and I found this.
07:42Experimenting with babies.
07:44Fifty amazing science projects you can perform on your kid.
07:48You can't experiment on his kids.
07:49You're not their father.
07:51You can't experiment on my kids.
07:53Fine.
07:54Can I at least play a game with them?
07:56Perhaps.
07:57How developed is your peripheral vision?
08:00Mine's great.
08:01I saw that.
08:09You know, these experiments are pretty harmless.
08:12There's one where you just put the baby in front of a mirror and you watch them watch themselves.
08:17That sounds adorable.
08:18Let me see.
08:19Well, how come when she talks about experiments on babies you think it's adorable and I do it, everyone gets
08:23upset?
08:25I think I can speak for all of us.
08:27You're just creepy.
08:31No offense.
08:34Hey, this one we can do with both Michael and Halle.
08:37It's called grabby hands.
08:38Wasn't that your nickname in high school?
08:42No, it was mama's boy.
08:43But the joke was on them because I love my mom.
08:47Guys, listen.
08:48You secure them both in car seats and slowly spin a toy at the end of the string above them.
08:53The younger baby tends to reach with either hand and the older baby prefers the dominant hand.
08:58That is kind of interesting.
09:00It's not really experimenting on the kids.
09:02It's more like experimenting with the kids.
09:04Well, I guess if you think about it, it's kind of like playing games with them.
09:08Okay, you know what?
09:08When they wake up, we can try one or two of these.
09:10Yay!
09:14I said yay!
09:18Thank you. It's a brand new day.
09:21Wow, we got a pretty good crowd here.
09:23I know, but not as big as that booth. What's going on over there?
09:26Yeah, that's Chantix.
09:28Ray Liotta is signing autographs until two.
09:34Hey, I thought we weren't supposed to have our phones in the booth.
09:37That's a you rule, not a me rule.
09:41Hey, can I help you?
09:43Actually, I'm looking for the bathroom.
09:44Ah, yes, it's right next to the laxative booth.
09:46It's clever, right?
09:51So, we meet again.
09:52Oh, yeah. Danny, right? How's your launch going?
09:56Good. Is Dr. Rostenkowski around?
09:58No, she stepped out for a call, although I wouldn't be surprised if she's in line to meet Ray Liotta.
10:03Yeah, something tells me she's not crazy about me.
10:05Yeah, something tells me that too, and it was her.
10:09That doesn't matter. I was actually hoping to talk to you.
10:12Really?
10:12Yeah, you've done a terrific job with Inflaminex. We're always on the lookout for great salespeople. I think we can
10:18make you happy.
10:20Thanks, but I'm pretty happy.
10:21Oh, I could be more happy.
10:22Tell it you're shrink, Karen.
10:26Hey, Howie, everything okay?
10:28Yeah, everything's great. I was just wondering if we had any large barbecue tongs.
10:34Uh, bottom-up drawer. Are you guys grilling?
10:36Nope. Just playing games with the kids.
10:39Why do you need tongs?
10:40Love you too. Bye.
10:43I bet Michael grabs it before Hallie.
10:45Not a chance.
10:46Hallie's a year older. You know she's gonna get it first.
10:48I just think he wants it more. Come on. Come on, you got this. You got this, Michael.
10:53Grab it, grab it, Hallie. I believe in you.
10:55Don't. That was so, so close. Just keep on trying.
10:58Hey, hey, hey. You guys want to make this more interesting?
11:01By establishing a double-blind protocol so we have a foundation to publish? Yes.
11:08Look, here's my car. Maybe we can get a drink this weekend.
11:10Ugh, I don't know. I'm pretty busy. I have to inventory all the giveaways.
11:13Hey! Beat it! Shoo!
11:17So what did he want?
11:18Nothing. He offered her a job.
11:20No one likes a tattletale, Karen.
11:24So it's up, traitor.
11:25Damn it, Karen!
11:29Okay, you want to engage the babies.
11:30The subjects.
11:33The babies.
11:33Uh, fine. The babies.
11:36Baby A and Baby B.
11:38Engage them for a minute and take note of their reactions.
11:41There's something familiar about all this.
11:44Okay, go.
11:45Hello, baby. Are you having a pleasant day?
11:48Oh, my God. This...
11:49is my entire childhood.
11:53Leonard, Leonard, you're chaining my data.
11:55It's like word for word.
11:58How much time is left?
11:5935 seconds.
12:00Oh, really? He's not reacting at all.
12:02Sheldon, he's a baby. That's not how you talk to him, okay? Just watch.
12:08Hey, Hallie.
12:10Who's your favorite uncle?
12:14Uncle Coop.
12:16I got a dud. Let's switch.
12:19Keep trying. It's for science.
12:22Is that all I was to her? Just an experiment?
12:25Michael. Michael. You're making me look bad.
12:28Hey, interact with me.
12:29He grabbed my finger.
12:30Oh, he's smiling. I'm doing it.
12:34That's time.
12:35Oh, really? Can we do one more?
12:37I think these guys need to get some food.
12:40By pushing a lever at the end of an obstacle course that we designed?
12:44No, by opening the door to a hangar and letting the airplane fly in.
12:49Although, Sheldon, maybe it could be an experiment.
12:52Are you suggesting we color code their food so we can examine their diapers later?
12:58Sure.
13:00These diapers are gonna be full of data.
13:05Never thought I would see Sheldon enjoying himself around babies so much.
13:10Yeah, how about that?
13:11So he just happened to stumble upon a book about experimenting with them the same day we were hanging out
13:17with Howard's kids.
13:20Yep, don't overthink it.
13:25Oh, my God. At sleepaway camp, my cabin was called Control Group.
13:36I can't believe you took his business card.
13:38I can't believe we're still talking about this.
13:40He handed it to me. What was I supposed to do?
13:42Hand it back to him and tell him to stick it where the sun don't shine.
13:46You're not serious.
13:48Serious is the hepatitis their cholesterol medication gave thousands of people.
13:53Did it?
13:55Maybe.
13:57You're not really considering this, are you?
14:00I don't know. It's kind of flattering.
14:02Please, he's just using you to get to me.
14:04Or he's trying to get to me because I'm really good at my job.
14:08Don't be so naive. They're a number one competitor.
14:11They have a rival drug coming out with a name I wish we thought of. For soothe.
14:16It's got soothe right in it. How do we miss that?
14:19You know, our brand recognition is three times higher than theirs.
14:22And I did that with a stupid product name and no assistant.
14:25You only have this job because I gave it to you.
14:28You know who else was begging you to head up their sales team? Nobody.
14:31Well, you know who's begging me now? Danny.
14:34Can't believe this is how you thank me.
14:36I thanked you by thanking you. And I sent you that fancy box of pears.
14:40What am I supposed to do with 20 pears? I'm a pear party?
14:49Ooh, I'm a juicy pear.
14:54Where are the kids?
14:55Oh, Sheldon's helping Howard give them a bath.
14:58Hmm. So you really think you can trick Sheldon into liking babies?
15:04I slept with him. I married him. You want to bet against me?
15:11Well, you were right, Amy. There were so many valuable experiments to perform on them during bath time.
15:17You don't say.
15:21I do. I tested their object permanence with a rubber duck and we took a run at Archimedes water displacement,
15:27but that went right over their heads.
15:29Well, I'm glad you had a good day.
15:31I did. It's so funny. We did all these experiments on them and they didn't even notice.
15:37I know. I was worried it would be obvious, but it wasn't.
15:44I guess we should go and let Howard get them ready for bed.
15:47Yeah. Do you think he'd let us come back and do some more?
15:49Maybe we could take them to the park.
15:51Smart. There'll be more babies. It's a bigger sample size.
16:01Where did Leonard go?
16:03Just tell me the truth, mother.
16:06Was my whole childhood just one big experiment?
16:10Of course not, dear. It was thousands of small experiments.
16:15So that's all I was to you? A test subject?
16:20No, you were my baby and I found you fascinating.
16:24Really?
16:24Yes, watching you develop, tracking your progress.
16:29I know I'm not the warmest of parents, but it was time we spent together and honestly, those are some
16:36of my fondest memories.
16:40When did you stop?
16:42Oh, I can't tell you. The experiment isn't over.
16:50Xan Gen's a fine company. They got a couple of good drugs, but we control 60% of the market.
16:55Hell, commissions on just our fungal creams will put you in a new Mercedes.
16:59Danny, Danny, look at me. Does his face sell fungal creams?
17:04No. His face is cholesterol drugs and above.
17:08Playing hard to get, huh?
17:10No one's ever accused me of that before.
17:13Look, why don't I just give you a number and see what you think?
17:16Ooh, are you gonna write it on a napkin and slide it over to me?
17:20No, I was just gonna say it.
17:23Aw.
17:24Do you want me to write it on a napkin and slide it over to you?
17:26Yeah.
17:28You got it.
17:31Danny, you rat bastard!
17:34What? I'm just making your friend an offer.
17:36Yeah, he's writing it on a napkin like in the movies.
17:41That's not an offer. Do you know how amazing this girl is?
17:44Aw, you think I'm amazing?
17:45Stay out of this!
17:47I'm serious. Not only is she a hell of a salesperson, she's the hardest worker I've ever seen.
17:51I know. That's why I'm trying to steal her from you.
17:54Well, then you're gonna have to do a lot better than this, because I promise you I'm not gonna let
17:57her go without a fight.
17:58You do not want that. She's a biter.
18:00But just think about it.
18:04You know, I don't have to.
18:05Thanks, but I'm happy where I am.
18:07Let's go.
18:11Can I just see what he wrote on the napkin?
18:13What napkin?
18:20You know, spending time with Michael and Hallie today really made me think about our future children.
18:30Huh. What an interesting and completely unforeseen development.
18:35What are you thinking?
18:37Well, I just can't decide. Either five sets of triplets or three sets of quintuplets.
18:45You know what? It doesn't matter as long as they're healthy.
18:48And divisible by three.
18:51That's a lot of babies, Sheldon.
18:53Oh, only for humans. For frogs, it's just a drop in the bucket.
18:58Well, I'm sorry I'm not a frog.
19:01Oh, don't feel bad, Amy. You're good enough for me.
19:04HARI SELLS
19:12I don't know.
19:37I don't know.
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