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Watch The Big Bang Theory AMZN GalaxyTV Season 11 Episode 17 online in HD on Dailymotion.
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00:02Oh, my God, I can't believe how big Hallie's getting.
00:05Where's Howard?
00:06He's changing, Michael.
00:08All done.
00:09Fun fact, did you know baby boys can pee straight up?
00:13Grown-up boys, too.
00:17Why would we high-five that?
00:19So, how are you guys?
00:21Really good.
00:23Except for when we went grocery shopping, the checkout lady asked when I was due.
00:27But you handled it well.
00:31Well, if you guys need help, I'd be happy to come over.
00:34Oh, thanks, but we're really trying to enjoy this family time before we both go back to work.
00:38Okay, well, we all miss you.
00:40You guys, too.
00:40Bye.
00:43Oh, boy.
00:44Seeing them all together like that has got my biological clock ticking like crazy.
00:50I don't think men have.
00:51I do.
00:55Hi.
00:55Hello.
00:56Hi, guys.
00:57Good news.
00:57We have saved the date cards.
01:00Oh, uh, didn't go with my calligrapher.
01:02Interesting.
01:04What is this picture?
01:06Oh, it's an MRI of our brains photoshopped to look like they're kissing.
01:11Is it too sexy?
01:12It's too something.
01:16Yeah, he's mid-twelve.
01:17That's exciting.
01:18I know.
01:19Do you guys have a location yet?
01:20Because you don't have a lot of time.
01:21Hey, it took us nine months to pick a date and a week to decide if brains can have lips
01:25on them,
01:25so get in the boat and row.
01:26Oh, it's too much.
01:26No.
01:28Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state that nearly 14 million years ago expansion started
01:35way around.
01:36The earth began to cool.
01:37The autotrophs began to drool.
01:38And with all developed tools, we built a wall.
01:41We built the pyramids.
01:42Math, science, history, unraveling the mystery that all started with a big bang.
01:56Michael's out.
01:57So's Hallie.
01:59Oh, my God, he's so cute.
02:01So is she.
02:03Switch?
02:04Yeah.
02:09Oh, my God, he's so cute.
02:11So is she.
02:13I just love him so much.
02:15Me too.
02:17My heart feels like it's going to explode.
02:20Of course, it's full of brisket, so it probably will.
02:24Oh, I didn't even know I was capable of loving someone so much.
02:29What do you mean?
02:32Oh, well...
02:33I'm just messing with you.
02:34I totally love them more than you.
02:36I get that.
02:38I would take a bullet for them.
02:40But I would get seriously mutilated for you.
02:45That's sweet.
02:46But you should know, if you got seriously mutilated, I might dump you.
02:50It'd be crazy not to.
02:52Even I'm mutilated, I'm not prized.
02:57You know, I'm really happy with our wedding date.
02:59The month squared equals the square of the sum of the members of the set of prime factors of the
03:05day.
03:05Isn't that romantic?
03:08Yes, it's like that Shakespeare sonnet.
03:10Shall I compare thee to a day that's also a really weird math problem?
03:15It's a shame you're joking.
03:16That'd be a lovely reading at our ceremony.
03:19Well, we only have two months to find a venue, and I had a thought.
03:23What about the Athenaeum Club at Caltech?
03:25Oh, Albert Einstein was a member there.
03:28It's beautiful.
03:29Yeah, and Albert Einstein was a member there.
03:32It's close.
03:33And Albert Einstein was a member there.
03:35And Albert Einstein was a member there.
03:38Nah, you sound like a woman who wants to get married.
03:43So you're interested?
03:44Oh, of course.
03:45Yeah, but that club's extremely exclusive.
03:48Leonard's been trying to get us in there for years, but no luck.
03:51Well, that's odd.
03:52When I called, they said they'd be excited to give us a tour.
03:54I suppose we can give it a look, and if it doesn't work out,
03:57I hear that there is a nearby Chinese restaurant that Einstein used to frequent.
04:03Or we pick a place we like and don't worry about Einstein.
04:08Well, reality TV is right.
04:10Brides are crazy.
04:15So how's it been being home with two kids?
04:17Oh, tiring, but super rewarding.
04:20Oh, like Pilates.
04:21You got it.
04:23Honestly, it's going to be hard when we both go back to work.
04:27I've been thinking maybe it would be better if one of us decided to stay home.
04:32I don't know.
04:33I was raised by servants, and look at me.
04:38I literally can't tell if you think that's good or bad.
04:41On one hand, they filled my tub with scented oils and brought me honeyed sweets.
04:45On the other hand, I spent my 20s incapable of talking to women, so, you know.
04:50Pros and cons.
04:54Here's my dilemma.
04:55I kind of want to stay home, but Bernadette is a way better parent than I am.
05:00Wait, does Bernadette want to stay home?
05:02I don't know.
05:03She's really invested in her career.
05:04She's doing great.
05:06I think it should be me.
05:08Well, I admire you, Howard.
05:10It'd be hard for me to buck traditional gender roles like that.
05:15Didn't you see Taylor Swift twice this month?
05:21Yeah, because she's hot, not because she sings my truth.
05:28Did Albert Einstein ever sit in any of these chairs?
05:31I think these are fairly new, but Stephen Hawking's eaten here a lot.
05:34Yeah, but he brings his own chair.
05:39Well, it seems kind of perfect.
05:41And it's close enough to your office so you can use the bathroom you like.
05:44I put a sticker over the auto flush so it doesn't startle me.
05:51Here's my card.
05:52Why don't you two talk it over, and I will check to see if our soup spoons are deeper than
05:57they are wide.
06:00What? Too deep as a ladle, not a spoon.
06:05I really like it.
06:06Oh, I must admit, I do as well.
06:09Look at how somber all the men in these portraits are.
06:12I feel like that sets a good tone for our wedding.
06:16Is that Leonard?
06:17Oh, no, no.
06:18These are all dead, accomplished scientists.
06:21Leonard will only ever be one of those things.
06:25I mean, Leonard and Penny are right there.
06:29But he told me he checked on our membership just last week,
06:31and we were still 400th in line.
06:35I'm sure there's an innocent explanation that won't ruin my day at all.
06:40Leonard?
06:41Oh, hey.
06:41Hey.
06:42How did you get in here?
06:43What do you mean?
06:44Leonard's a member.
06:46You told me it was incredibly exclusive.
06:49Yeah, look, about that, I lied.
06:53Hey, wait, you told me it was exclusive, too.
06:55Mm-hmm.
06:56I avoided him and impressed you all with the same lie.
07:00Damn, Hofstetter.
07:01Didn't think you had it in you.
07:03Well, I'm not sure I know how I feel about this place now.
07:06Then don't turn around.
07:08Koopa!
07:13Oh, good.
07:15You're here.
07:15There's something I want to talk to you about.
07:19We're not putting a TV in the bathroom.
07:21That's how you get hemorrhoids.
07:24No, this is important.
07:26Uh, I was thinking maybe one of us should stay home full-time with the kids.
07:31Oh, great.
07:32So I have to give up my job and everything I worked for?
07:35Actually, I was thinking I should stay home.
07:38Oh, so I have to abandon my children and go back to work while you get to stay home and
07:41bond with them?
07:44You just said you didn't want to.
07:46No, I don't want to have to.
07:48But if I want to, I should get to.
07:53Do you want to?
07:55Maybe I do.
07:56What if I also want to?
07:58Well, I don't know.
07:59We can't both stay home.
08:01Don't you think you should go back to work because you make more money?
08:05Don't you think you should make more money?
08:08I think it's pretty sexist of you to say a dad can't stay home with his children.
08:13You know what else is sexist?
08:14The phrase, suck it.
08:16Yet here we are.
08:21I can't believe Leonard lied to me.
08:23What are we going to find out next?
08:25That he's not really lactose intolerant?
08:26Huh?
08:28He's just friends with an invisible trumpet player?
08:33I know you're upset, but if we want to book the Athenaeum, we really should do it now.
08:38And then I promise we'll have our whole lives to complain about Leonard.
08:43Aw, somebody got a head start on her vows.
08:47So do we agree?
08:49Do we want to get married there?
08:50I don't know.
08:51I mean, Einstein was a member.
08:53I like that.
08:54No?
08:55But Leonard's a member, and that really steams my clams.
09:00Oh, I love it when you're folksy.
09:01I'm just going to call.
09:03On the other hand, shaming Leonard during our wedding at the very place he betrayed me does have a beautiful
09:09symmetry to it.
09:12That's nice.
09:12It'll be your first petty act as a married man.
09:17Oh, hi, Kathleen.
09:19Yeah, this is Amy from earlier.
09:21I'd like to go ahead and reserve May 12th.
09:24Although it is our wedding, maybe it shouldn't be all about revenge.
09:30Oh, I see.
09:32Okay.
09:33Thanks.
09:37Someone booked our date.
09:39What?
09:40Who?
09:42Well, well, well.
09:46This is a pickle.
09:49Yes, so if you will just move your birthday party to a different location, everything will be fine.
09:56It's Twinkie.
09:58I don't want to move my potty, but I also don't want to help you.
10:01Oh, wait.
10:02I don't have a problem.
10:06No, I do.
10:07Yeah, you do.
10:17Morning.
10:18Hey, where you been?
10:19Oh, nowhere special.
10:21Just the park, the farmer's market.
10:22Then we hopped on the gold line to Chinatown because it's important for the kids to experience other cultures.
10:28What have you been doing?
10:30It's 8 a.m.
10:32Sleeping.
10:32So are the kids.
10:34I guess they take after you.
10:38You're just trying to prove that you do a better job than me.
10:41You're pretty sharp, having just woken up.
10:45Howard, we both know you can't keep up this pace.
10:48By this afternoon, you're going to be passed out on the couch, and I'm going to have three exhausted babies
10:52to deal with.
10:54Not true.
10:55I got this.
10:56In fact, why don't you take the day off?
10:59Fine.
11:00Maybe I'll have lunch with Penny.
11:01Take your time.
11:03Get a massage.
11:04You deserve it, after all the sleep you've been getting.
11:10Maybe Barry will change his mind.
11:13Oh, I doubt it.
11:14I said some pretty unprofessional things about his work.
11:17I may have even used the S word.
11:22Subpar?
11:24I'm not proud of it, Amy, but I have a temper.
11:28I suppose we could pick a different date.
11:30Well, it took you nine months to choose that one.
11:32I'll pick a different husband first.
11:38Hey, I just wanted to apologize about the Athenaeum.
11:41Why did you lie to me?
11:42I don't know.
11:44It just seemed funny at first, and then the longer it went on, funnier got.
11:51So, yeah, I guess that's why.
11:54That's not much of an apology.
11:56Yeah, because he's not really sorry.
11:57Obviously, he wanted a place to go where I wouldn't be, and apparently all of outside wasn't enough for him.
12:04Come on, I do feel bad.
12:06Why?
12:07Did your best friend hurt your feelings?
12:08What, Sheldon?
12:09Well, look, I only have time to deal with one jerk right now, and that's Barry Kripke.
12:13What?
12:13He has the Athenaeum booked for our wedding date, and he won't give it up.
12:17Yeah, so if you could just please leave before I get angry and say something I will regret about your
12:21face, your height, your personal hygiene,
12:23or the fact that your science, while serviceable, lacks panache.
12:29It's actually one of the nicest things you've ever said about my work.
12:33And now I regret it.
12:34Goodbye.
12:40Hey, there you are.
12:41Yeah, I just wanted to stop in and see my office before we went to lunch.
12:45Just a few more weeks, you'll be back full-time, huh?
12:47Yeah.
12:49Uh-oh, that wasn't a happy yeah.
12:52That was a, hey, Leonard, do you want to go to the gym yeah?
12:56I've just been thinking that maybe I'd rather stay home with the kids and be a mom.
13:01Wow, that's big.
13:02I know.
13:04Dr. Rostenkowski, I'm sorry I didn't know you were back.
13:07Oh, I'm not.
13:07I just came to meet Penny for lunch.
13:09Is there anything I can get you?
13:11Coffee, water?
13:12No, I think we're just gonna...
13:12Coffee sounds good.
13:15Cold brew, almond milk?
13:16Perfect.
13:17Nothing, nothing for me.
13:21It's weird, I've been away so long, I don't miss any of this.
13:26Sorry to bother you.
13:27Dr. Lee heard you were here and had a quick question.
13:29Yeah, fine, put him on.
13:32Gerald, what's going on?
13:33Hope you're not screwing out my research.
13:37You calling for a bike ride?
13:38Because you're backpedaling hard.
13:40All right, fine, email it over, I'll take a look.
13:47Oh, sorry, where were we?
13:49Love your kids, don't miss your job.
13:51Right, right.
13:53There's nothing in the world like holding your sleeping baby, knowing you make him feel safe,
13:58and then, oh, good, you've got the little cookies I like.
14:01I wouldn't mind a cookie.
14:03And he's gone.
14:13Hey, Kripke.
14:14Hello, Hofstetter.
14:17Why are you cleaning that out yourself?
14:19Don't you have grad students?
14:20Come on, I can't make my grad students do every dirty job.
14:24Or so I've been told in whiting by the head of human resources.
14:30Fair enough.
14:31Uh, so, look, I'm here to ask you to give Sheldon and Amy the anthem for their wedding.
14:39Why would I do that?
14:42Because, deep down, Barry, you're a really good guy.
14:47But am I?
14:52Fine, what's it going to take?
14:59Barry, I have come to ask one more...
15:02Leonard?
15:04Why are you doing that?
15:06Because, deep down, Barry is not a good guy.
15:10He's making you clean out barrels of irradiated grease?
15:13Yeah.
15:16I made a deal with him to get you the Athenaeum for your wedding.
15:22Why would you do that?
15:24Because I was a jerk for lying to you before.
15:27And besides, you're my best friend.
15:29I want you to have the wedding of your dreams.
15:32On Mars?
15:37Okay, I want Amy to have the wedding of her dreams.
15:40Well, thank you.
15:42But, I don't want you to do this.
15:44Well, that's okay.
15:45No, it's not.
15:47We're not going to let Barry win.
15:49Well, what are we going to do?
15:50We have a combined IQ of 360.
15:53Perhaps more if that radiation gave you a superbrain.
15:58Yeah, you're right.
16:00If we work together, we can totally outsmart Barry Kripke.
16:11Leonard, my nose itches.
16:12What do I do?
16:18Boy, I really pass out hard.
16:21Ah, tell me about it.
16:22The kids could have screamed bloody murder and you wouldn't have woken up.
16:25Which I know because they did.
16:29I'm sorry.
16:30Why did I think I could do this on my own?
16:33Hey, don't be to yourself, huh?
16:35Parenting is hard.
16:37Like, I've seen and smelled things today that I cannot unsee or unsmell.
16:43Thanks for covering for me.
16:44No, I mean, he only drinks milk.
16:46Like, where are the colors coming from?
16:52What time is it?
16:53It's almost 6.
16:54Okay.
16:56Bernadette's going to be home soon.
16:57We've got to divide and conquer.
16:58I'll make dinner.
16:59You watch the kids.
17:00Kids are asleep.
17:00Great, then you make dinner.
17:06Good news, Amy.
17:08We got the Athenaeum.
17:09Oh, my gosh.
17:10That's amazing.
17:12How'd you get Barry to change his mind?
17:14Well, I couldn't have done it without Leonard.
17:16Boy, you should have seen us in there.
17:18We were like Batman and Robin.
17:21Why do I have to be Robin?
17:22If you have to ask, you're Robin.
17:26What happened?
17:27Well, he scrubbed out some barrels of irradiated grease, rinsed off in the safety shower, and
17:32then told Barry Kripke what is what.
17:35And he just gave in?
17:36Well, we agreed to invite him to the wedding.
17:39Okay, no problem.
17:40And he gets to bring a date.
17:42Well, that's reasonable.
17:43And if she charges by the hour, we have to cover it.
17:49What else did you agree to?
17:51Well, um, you know how Barry has the voice of an angel?
17:57He is not singing at our wedding.
17:59He only wants to sing Volare.
18:02Oh, Volare!
18:06That's what he was saying, but I did not get that.
18:10Guys, I appreciate everything you did, but we can find another location that's just as
18:15good.
18:16Maybe the Japanese garden or the planetarium.
18:19Oh, the planetarium!
18:21I hadn't thought about that.
18:22That's even better.
18:23Wait, what?
18:25I scrubbed sludge for you.
18:27I may be slightly radioactive.
18:30Oh, you're exaggerating.
18:33Don't let him touch the silverware.
18:43Why is Raj asleep on our couch?
18:45I needed some help, so he came by, played with the kids, read them some stories, put
18:49them down for their nap, and made dinner.
18:52What'd you do?
18:54Ate dinner.
18:58Look, I don't think I'm cut out to be a stay-at-home dad.
19:01And since you want to, you should stay home.
19:04I do definitely want to, but I know how much this means to you.
19:08And it was just one day, so don't give up.
19:13You don't want to stay home either, do you?
19:16When I went by the office, they gave me coffee and cookies and no one peed on me.
19:22I miss that so much.
19:24Well, I love the kids, but I also love my job and sleep.
19:32I know, I took a two-hour nap on the couch in my office.
19:35I took a three-hour nap on the floor in the living room.
19:38How do you feel now?
19:40Honestly?
19:41Still tired.
19:43Me too.
19:45I love you.
19:46I love you too.
19:48And we'll figure this all out.
19:49Yeah.
19:53Everyone's asleep.
19:55You want to head upstairs and, you know.
20:01Let's just do it right here.
20:03Oh, I like the way you think.
20:33I like the way you think.
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