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Watch The Big Bang Theory AMZN GalaxyTV Season 5 Episode 20 online in HD on Dailymotion.
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00:02Oh, my God, I love this chicken.
00:04Oh, you know what they say, best things in life are free.
00:09Okay, you're right, I eat your food a lot.
00:11Now, how about this, you can raid my fridge anytime you want.
00:14Oh, that's very kind of you.
00:15Next time I have a hankering to wash down a D-cell battery with a jar of old pickle juice,
00:20I'll come and knock him.
00:22Hey, Raj, you didn't send your RSVP in.
00:25I'm supposed to ask you if you're bringing someone to the wedding.
00:28I'll let you know.
00:29Well, can you make it soon?
00:30There's a battle royale going on over the seating charts.
00:32In one corner, Bernadette's mom and the other three, mine.
00:36I hate wedding receptions.
00:38I wish the bride and groom would take a cue from Bilbo Baggins.
00:41Slip on the ring, disappear, and everyone goes home.
00:45You like Professor Geister's wedding?
00:47They had a make-your-own-sunday bar.
00:50That was a night to remember.
00:52Do you know, on one trip, I just had a bowl of nuts.
00:56Anyway, you've got to let me know if you have a plus one.
00:59Because if not, my mom's trying to sneak in the doctor who sucked the fat out of her neck.
01:07All right, fine.
01:08I'm coming and I'm bringing somebody.
01:10Kudrupali plus one.
01:11Who are you bringing?
01:12Who are you bringing?
01:14He's bringing me.
01:15Who are you bringing?
01:16Wow, what a bunch of nosy O'Donnells.
01:20Come on, who is it?
01:22I'm not telling.
01:23I'm from Asia.
01:24I'm mysterious.
01:25Deal with it.
01:27Howard, are you having a make-your-own-sunday bar?
01:30I don't think so.
01:32Well, you should.
01:3350% of marriages end in divorce.
01:35But 100% of make-your-own-sunday bars end in happiness.
01:39Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state that nearly 14 million years ago, expansion
01:45started way around.
01:46The earth began to cool.
01:47The autotrophs began to drool the end.
01:49With all the developed tools, we built a wall.
01:51We built a pyramid.
01:52Math, science, history, unraveling the mystery.
01:55That all started with a big bang.
02:03Hello, Mommy, Daddy.
02:04How are you?
02:05Pretty good.
02:06Can't complain.
02:08Oh, I'm sure you can.
02:09Just give it a minute.
02:12Listen, there's something I want to talk to you about.
02:15I wasn't ready until now, but I think it's time.
02:19It's finally happening.
02:20You're coming out of the closet, aren't you?
02:23We love you, and we accept your alternate lifestyle.
02:26Sir, just keep it to yourself.
02:30No, I'm not gay.
02:32If anything, I'm metrosexual.
02:35What's that?
02:36It means I like women as well as their skincare products.
02:40Well, if you're not coming out, why did you call us during the cricket semifinals?
02:45I'm tired of trying to meet someone, and I think I'd like you to help me find a wife.
02:53And just to clarify, a female wife.
02:57Yes!
02:59Matchmaking.
03:00Very smart move, son.
03:02Much better than marrying for love.
03:08We married for love.
03:11And it's been wonderful.
03:17Quantum physics makes me so happy.
03:20Yeah, I'm glad.
03:22It's like looking at the universe naked.
03:33Hey, guys, got a minute?
03:34Sure.
03:34What's up?
03:35Well, I was thinking about Sheldon's little joke the other night about me eating all your
03:39food.
03:39Oh, that was no joke.
03:41But I understand your confusion as I am our group's resident cut-up.
03:47I'm sorry, you are our resident cut-up?
03:51Yes.
03:53Prove it.
03:54Knock, knock.
03:55Who was there?
03:56Interrupting physicist.
03:57Interrupting physicist.
03:57Muon.
04:02Anyway, I got a little residual check from my commercial, and I thought, hey, how about
04:06I get the guys a little thank you to pay them back?
04:09So, Sheldon, ta-da!
04:12A vintage mint-in-box 1975 Mego Star Trek transporter with real transporter action.
04:18Hot darn!
04:21Where did you get that?
04:22That's from Stewart at the comic book store.
04:24You went to the comic book store by yourself?
04:26Yeah.
04:28It was fun.
04:28I walked in and two different guys got asthma attacks.
04:33Felt pretty good.
04:35This calls for an expression of gratitude.
04:37Ooh, am I about to get a rare Sheldon Cooper hug?
04:40No, not this time.
04:40Then they wouldn't be special.
04:42Thanks, Penny.
04:45You're welcome.
04:47Don't worry.
04:48I didn't forget about you.
04:50Leonard, I got you a label maker!
04:58A transporter!
05:00Oh.
05:02No, it's great.
05:03It's also a mint-in-box.
05:07And I got you a transporter, too!
05:09Transporter!
05:14Look, it was actually designed for my vintage Mr. Spock action figure.
05:18Oh, that's great.
05:18Let's open it up and put it in there.
05:19No, good Lord, no.
05:22Why, they're just toys?
05:24They're mint-in-box.
05:26Come on, can't we open one up and take a look?
05:28No, no, no!
05:29Once you open the box, it loses its value.
05:32Yeah, yeah.
05:33My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity.
05:38I gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.
05:44Are you sure you want us here when you meet this woman?
05:47Oh, yes.
05:47In my culture, it's expected to have a chaperone to oversee a first date.
05:51Plus, I want to make a good impression and no offense, but with you guys here, I look
05:55like I'm 6'2".
05:58The nuns always chaperoned the dances at my high school.
06:01They used to make us leave room between us for the Holy Spirit.
06:05Now, Hindus do the same thing, except they leave room for a cow.
06:10Listen, I love your charming racist humor, but any chance you could not mock my religion
06:14while she's here?
06:15Yesterday, you made fun of me for eating lox.
06:17It's different.
06:18Your people don't worship lox.
06:19Clearly, you've never been to brunch with my cousins.
06:23So, arrange marriages.
06:24The parents just decide and then you have to get married?
06:26No, no.
06:27I get a say in it.
06:28But I'm sure whoever shows up will be better company than the threesome I've been having
06:31with Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth.
06:36Excuse me, are you Rajesh?
06:38Yes.
06:39You must be Lakshmi.
06:40Nice to meet you.
06:41Nice to meet you, too.
06:43Oh, these are my friends.
06:44This is Bernadette.
06:45Hello.
06:46And this is Howard.
06:47Nice to meet you.
06:48You, too.
06:48Please, have a seat.
06:50I'm thinking double wedding.
06:57Dr. Cooper.
07:01Dr. Cooper.
07:04Is someone there?
07:06Down here, on your desk.
07:13Spock?
07:14I need to speak with you.
07:18Fascinating.
07:19The only logical explanation is that this is a dream.
07:23It is not the only logical explanation.
07:26For example, you could be hallucinating after being hit on the head by, say, a coconut.
07:34Was I hit on the head by a coconut?
07:36I'm not going to dignify that with a response.
07:40Now, to the matter at hand, you need to play with a transporter toy.
07:45But it's mint in box.
07:46Yes.
07:47And to open it would destroy its value.
07:49But remember, like me, you also have a human half.
07:54Well, I'm not going to dignify that with a response.
07:58Consider this.
08:00What is the purpose of a toy?
08:02To be played with.
08:03Therefore, to not play with it would be...
08:06Illogical.
08:07Damn it, Spock.
08:08You're right.
08:11I'll do it.
08:13Sheldon, wait.
08:15You have to wake up first.
08:17Of course.
08:19Set phasers to dumb, right?
08:23Goodie, goodie, goodie.
08:27This is wrong.
08:28This is wrong.
08:29I'm so excited.
08:29But this is wrong.
08:30This is wrong.
08:33I'm going to do it.
08:35I'm doing it.
08:37I did it.
08:42Oh.
08:44That's what I always thought 1975 smelled like.
08:50One to beam down, Mr. Scott.
08:53Aye, aye, Mr. Spock.
08:55Energize.
09:00Energize.
09:12Don't be broken.
09:15Please don't be broken.
09:18What did you make me do?
09:21Okay, okay.
09:23Think.
09:31It's only logical.
09:36My goodness, that was delicious.
09:38Well, I hope you saved room for chocolate lava cake.
09:42Impressive.
09:44What goes into making something like that?
09:46Well, you start out by trying to make chocolate souffle,
09:49and when it falls, you panic, quickly change the name,
09:51and voila, lava cake.
09:54I bet our parents are dying to know how things are going here.
09:57Well, let's see.
10:01Yep, three missed calls.
10:02Four missed calls, two text messages, and a failed video chat.
10:05I win.
10:08So, what are we going to tell them?
10:11I'd like to tell them things are going well.
10:13Me too.
10:14But before we get their hopes up,
10:15we should probably make sure we're on the same page.
10:18Okay.
10:20What page are you on?
10:22I'm on the one where I'm under a lot of pressure from my parents
10:26to get married and settle down and have a family,
10:29and I'm going to do it so they don't find out I'm gay.
10:34Say again?
10:36I'm gay.
10:39Like, dude on dude, but with women?
10:43I know a fake marriage isn't an honest way to live,
10:45but you of all people should know how difficult it is
10:47to come out in our culture.
10:49Why me of all people?
10:51Well, there's a rumor back in New Delhi
10:53that you're, how shall we say, comfortable in a sari.
10:58I'm not gay.
11:00Really?
11:01The chocolate lava cake, the little soaps in the bathroom,
11:04and I'm sorry, but you're wearing more perfume than I am.
11:07That's Unbreakable by Chloe and Lamar.
11:10And for your information, it's unisex.
11:14Fill in the blank.
11:16I love the nightlife.
11:17I like to boogie.
11:18Got you.
11:19With women?
11:20I like to boogie with women.
11:23That's disappointing.
11:25You were exactly the kind of phony baloney husband I was looking for.
11:30And once again, my baloney likes girls.
11:35Wait, wait, wait.
11:36You don't want to put a bite of that in your mouth without trying my homemade Chantilly cream.
11:42Yeah, okay.
11:43That time I heard it.
11:56Oh, dear.
11:58Two suns and no sunscreen.
12:06Hello again, Sheldon.
12:10What is it now, Tiny Spock?
12:13I am very disappointed in you.
12:15You broke your toy and switched it with Leonard's.
12:18You should be ashamed of yourself.
12:20You're the one who told me to play with it.
12:22If I told you to jump off the bridge of the Enterprise, would you do it?
12:26Oh, if I got on the bridge of the Enterprise, I would never, ever leave.
12:32Trust me, it gets old after a while.
12:36You must right your wrong, Sheldon.
12:39Why?
12:39I got away with it.
12:41Leonard has his toy, and he's never going to open it, so he won't know it's broken.
12:45And I have a toy that isn't broken.
12:48Everybody's happy.
12:49Well, I am unhappy.
12:51I thought where you come from, they don't have emotions.
12:54I come from a factory in Taiwan.
12:59Now, do the right thing.
13:00You know what you are?
13:02You're a green-blooded buzzkill.
13:05Hey, perhaps it's time you beam on out of here.
13:07Fine.
13:08I will just use the transporter.
13:10Oh, right.
13:12You broke it.
13:15Very well.
13:16Cooper to Enterprise, one to beam up.
13:20Energize.
13:32Tiny spark, help.
13:39Ready for lunch?
13:41One sec.
13:43Oh, good.
13:44Ma would have killed me if she found out I broke my retainer.
13:49Hey, uh, can I run something by you?
13:51It's about Lakshmi.
13:52Yeah, sure.
13:53How are things going?
13:55We hit a couple of bumps.
13:56She lives over in Manhattan Beach, so it takes like an hour to get there.
13:59And she's a lesbian.
14:03What do you mean, she's a lesbian?
14:04Well, you know, whenever you and I would try to hit on women in bars and they'd blow us
14:09off and then we'd tell each other they were probably gay, it's like that.
14:12Except this time it's true.
14:16Then why did she even go out with you?
14:18She was looking for her husband so she can appear to be straight.
14:21And you know, it sounded crazy to me at first.
14:24But I'm actually thinking about doing it.
14:27Okay, so the reason that might sound crazy is because it's crazy.
14:33Look, Howard, you're in a relationship.
14:35You know you have to make compromises.
14:37Yes, but my compromises are about which bedspread to buy or whose turn it is to do the laundry.
14:43Bernadette's or my mom's?
14:47It's a great deal.
14:49We both get our parents off our backs.
14:51I don't have to come home to an empty apartment every night.
14:53Plus, once I'm married, I can finally eat carbs again and let myself go.
14:59Why don't you tell your parents you want to try to find someone else?
15:03Maybe one who hasn't slept with more women than you.
15:07Because this one wants to marry me.
15:09I might never find another one who does.
15:11So you're seriously thinking about marrying someone you're never going to have sex with?
15:16I can't believe your attitude.
15:17I thought you were in favor of gay people getting married.
15:21Yes, to other gay people.
15:24Do you hear how homophobic you sound?
16:04Yes, thank you.
16:06Oh, I don't want a broken toy.
16:12Nothing.
16:15What?
16:16Nothing. I said nothing.
16:18That was weird.
16:19Really? I don't even notice anymore.
16:23I cannot believe you guys aren't going to play with these.
16:25I told you, you don't. It's mint in box.
16:28I don't know. I just think it's a waste.
16:30No!
16:35Relax.
16:36I'm just looking at the box.
16:38Perhaps you should look with your eyes
16:39and not your muscular Nebraska man hands.
16:43What is your problem?
16:45My problem is that I don't want you to break Leonard's toy,
16:48which you probably did by shaking it.
16:50She shook it. We all saw her.
16:53Leonard, I bought you this
16:54because I wanted you to have fun with it.
16:56I don't want it to sit in this box.
16:59You know what?
17:00You're right.
17:01I mean, it's from you. I'm never going to sell it.
17:04I'm opening it.
17:05Yes!
17:16It's broken.
17:18What?
17:18Oh, nice job, man hands.
17:22I didn't break it.
17:24I guess Stuart sold it to me like this.
17:27Yes.
17:28Yes, he did.
17:29That is a perfectly satisfying and plausible explanation.
17:32Let's all be mad at Stuart.
17:35You know, I paid a lot for this.
17:37Let's take it over there and show him.
17:38Absolutely.
17:42Wait!
17:46It was me.
17:48I opened your toy, discovered it was broken and didn't tell you.
17:55Why would you open mine?
17:57I didn't.
17:57That was a lie.
17:59I opened my own toy.
18:02And it was already broken, so I switched them.
18:06You should talk to Stuart.
18:07I can't, because that was a lie.
18:11Yours was broken in an earthquake, and that's a lie.
18:17What is the truth?
18:20My Mr. Spock doll came to me in a dream and forced me to open it.
18:23And when the toy broke, I switched it for yours.
18:27Later, he encouraged me to do the right thing, and I defied him.
18:30And then I was attacked by a Gorn.
18:37Okay, that I believe.
18:39Leonard, Penny, I just, I want you both to know that I regret my actions towards the two of you.
18:44That's a lie.
18:47So, is that one mine?
18:49Yes.
18:49Well, hand it over so I can open it.
18:51Okay.
18:53And, Leonard, even though I don't have one anymore, I hope you have fun playing with it.
18:58And that's a lie, right?
18:59It's a big fat whopper.
19:02I hope it breaks.
19:08This is a treat.
19:09What brings you guys by?
19:11Raj, Howie told me what's going on with you and Lakshmi.
19:14You told her?
19:16I told everybody.
19:19We believe there's someone out there who'll love you for you.
19:22Well, actually, we kind of agreed to disagree on that one, but we both think you shouldn't marry this woman.
19:28So, while I'm waiting for this mysterious perfect match who may or may not exist, I'm supposed to just be
19:33alone?
19:34Not necessarily.
19:36I think we found someone for you to cuddle with.
19:40Heck.
19:40Oh, my goodness.
19:43Aren't you the cutest little Yorkie ever?
19:48You got him for me?
19:50Her.
19:51We thought you two would hit it off.
19:53I think we already have.
19:55Thank you guys so much.
19:57Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
20:01Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
20:29Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
20:32Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
20:33Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
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